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[Doomish]

Forget it.

[lolawesome]

so ... I guess you like to make your characters all batshit insane ... I see now

[Mirage_GSM]

Damn it, I thought you left this phase behind you.
Sorry. Stopped reading after the first two paragraphs.

[Henry Spencer]

This story makes me moist.

[Doomish]

Damn it, I thought you left this phase behind you.
Sorry. Stopped reading after the first two paragraphs.

Well, at least you... I guess, gave it a chance? The irony is that the two paragraphs were originally not in the story, I only added them so I didn't have to start right in the middle of a scene!

(Also, I am unsure what you mean by 'phase', would you kindly elaborate?)

[Bagheera]

(Also, I am unsure what you mean by 'phase', would you kindly elaborate?)

Presumably the "I'm going to have the characters do bloody, stupid, and/or extreme things instead of having them interact like, y'know, normal people" bit. The cast of KS does have their share of issues, but part of the appeal of the game lies in the fact that they've largely come to terms with their disabilities and can be taken as ordinary people with ordinary problems throughout the bulk of their routes. I often feel like you're losing sight of that when you start in with the cutting, gore, and generally extreme story turns.

[Roamin12]

This story is, I'm not sure how to explain it. I guess Doomish's trademark, over-the-top, gory, type of story. And I enjoyed, after all, I am one sadistic bastard.

(Also, I am unsure what you mean by 'phase', would you kindly elaborate?)

Presumably the "I'm going to have the characters do bloody, stupid, and/or extreme things instead of having them interact like, y'know, normal people" bit. The cast of KS does have their share of issues, but part of the appeal of the game lies in the fact that they've largely come to terms with their disabilities and can be taken as ordinary people with ordinary problems throughout the bulk of their routes. I often feel like you're losing sight of that when you start in with the cutting, gore, and generally extreme story turns.

Define "normal". Rika isn't one of the main routes, so we know very little about her, it is entirely possible that some characters have those kinds of fetishes. I knew someone who did, and at the risk of sounding like a suicidal, bat-shit crazy guy, pain does have a sort of release to it. I personally don't enjoy it, but it does have a feeling of calm and clarity once the pain fades, I'm not sure how to explain it.

[Bagheera]

Define "normal". Rika isn't one of the main routes, so we know very little about her, it is entirely possible that some characters have those kinds of fetishes. I knew someone who did, and at the risk of sounding like a suicidal, bat-shit crazy guy, pain does have a sort of release to it. I personally don't enjoy it, but it does have a feeling of calm and clarity once the pain fades, I'm not sure how to explain it.

I'm not saying it isn't realistic, or claiming that such people don't exist, because they obviously do. I'm just noting that Doomish seems unusually fixated on the idea (Misha material aside) and noting that that might have been what Mirage was getting at.

"Plausible" and "realistic" don't necessarily equate to "relatable". Such is not mandatory, of course, but without it you get the sorts of reactions we're seeing here.

[Doomish]

That's one of the whole points of the story, though. Rika isn't relatable to anyone (or, at least, only a small margin). Hisao is the voice of reason for once, he's the one you're supposed to be relating to if anything. The point of Rika as a character in this little one-shot is that even Hisao himself doesn't get her. He plays along because he wants to get her. I was trying not to step into this discussion because it was so interesting without me, but when it boils down to it, this is a one-shot fanfiction about sex with a non-character who has no development outside of "this is a character that exists".

In all honesty, I knew from the get-go I was eventually going to have to make a post explaining myself for this story if not one of my other less applicable to normal human living ones. It's just human nature not to enjoy something like this at face value. I could shrug off all of the criticism I'm getting for becoming the Michael Cera of shock horror fanfiction, but if you're willing to give this one a fair shake just like the others then it means I'm doing something right. Typecasting is another subject for another day, though.

I could have done this with any girl and the response would have been different because THOSE characters already have personalities; we already know Hanako would not do this or Emi would not do this. Rika, we do not. She is, for all intents and purposes, a clean slate for me to etch into with my own hammer and chisel. Eventually she will become as an obelisk, with writings and scrawlings dug deep into what was once a smooth, marble surface, but for now she is literally whatever I make of her. I made her out to be something people don't normally like to see because that's just what the conflict of the story is. This story centers around the fact that Rika asking Hisao to cut her is odd, out of the ordinary; it's a subject a lot of people are not comfortable with. Rika is the antagonist and that's definitely on purpose. It's not insane, it's just 'weird'.

I could write about normal things, sure, but that would require far more than a one-shot would be able to provide. I could develop the hell out of Rika before this scene and AFTER this scene, but I'm not going to do that because I don't need to. Rika is developed immediately in your mind as a reader right from the words "Cut me." After that, it's up to you who she is outside of the text on this page. I don't lose sight of character development when I write one-offs like this one, quite to the contrary; Hisao as the voice of reason was a conscious decision on my part. I could have- and originally did -have him go along with it to please Rika and end up enjoying it himself instead of ending up on the opposite end of the spectrum. That doesn't hold much water considering I ended up taking it in the direction I did, of course, but the point is that it's not like I write things like this just so I can have awful things happen to Japanese teenagers with disabilities. This isn't gore, this isn't shock horror, this is just a story about a would-be scenario about a still fresh tablet I wanted to etch my own lines into.

[Brogurt]

Rika is fat

[Doomish]

Rika is fat

Well, shit, you caught me

[Bagheera]

Rika is fat

C'mon, man, you're not even trying.

Doomish: I think the premise suffers on account of Rikabro's path; your Rika lines up pretty much perfectly with his, and as such she's not as novel as she might be otherwise. Also, Hisao's relatability plummets when he goes along with her request: the proper response there is "you're crazy, lady" followed by a quick exit. The fact that he didn't go that route makes him just as alien to us as she is. Again, not bad, necessarily, but . . . eh.

[DaGarver]

I don't think that it makes him unrelatable at all. I think it casts him as a typical teenager who happens to be lost in the throes of romance. He's willing to try anything to get into Rika's head, to see what she sees. We are socially curious creatures, we long to understand things we don't understand. It just happens that Hisao is curious about Rika.

[Roamin12]

Define "normal". Rika isn't one of the main routes, so we know very little about her, it is entirely possible that some characters have those kinds of fetishes. I knew someone who did, and at the risk of sounding like a suicidal, bat-shit crazy guy, pain does have a sort of release to it. I personally don't enjoy it, but it does have a feeling of calm and clarity once the pain fades, I'm not sure how to explain it.

I'm not saying it isn't realistic, or claiming that such people don't exist, because they obviously do. I'm just noting that Doomish seems unusually fixated on the idea (Misha material aside) and noting that that might have been what Mirage was getting at.

"Plausible" and "realistic" don't necessarily equate to "relatable". Such is not mandatory, of course, but without it you get the sorts of reactions we're seeing here.

I see what you mean, although I believe Doomish made a post regarding some reasons why he writes the type of things he does (He didn't outright say that is why he writes what he writes, I'm just inferring that.), I believe the post was in "With Apologies (To Harlan Ellison)", but I may be wrong on that.

Doomish: I think the premise suffers on account of Rikabro's path; your Rika lines up pretty much perfectly with his, and as such she's not as novel as she might be otherwise. Also, Hisao's relatability plummets when he goes along with her request: the proper response there is "you're crazy, lady" followed by a quick exit. The fact that he didn't go that route makes him just as alien to us as she is. Again, not bad, necessarily, but . . . eh.

I have never really been in a situation like that, but when I am honest with myself, I probably would've done the same as Hisao, much to my own shame.

I don't think that it makes him unrelatable at all. I think it casts him as a typical teenager who happens to be lost in the throes of romance. He's willing to try anything to get into Rika's head, to see what she sees. We are socially curious creatures, we long to understand things we don't understand. It just happens that Hisao is curious about Rika.

I agree with this.

[nemz]

Also, Hisao's relatability plummets when he goes along with her request: the proper response there is "you're crazy, lady" followed by a quick exit.

That probably the proper response to Rika in any context, honestly... assuming one isn't already harboring some deep self-destrctive issues and feels more or less like they have nothing to lose. With the right setup I find this Hisao entirely believable.