I REALLY don't want to get out of bed.
The hammering in my forehead agrees with me.
The day looms ahead of me like a troll under the proverbial bridge. I know I have to cross it, but to do so I'll have to risk the claws and teeth of the monster that lurks below.
Nevertheless, I slowly open my eyes, bleary and sleep filled. I try to look around at my room, but the white walls and open curtains conspire to disorient me with the radiance outside. The mirror over the dresser reflects the light, increasing the majesty of the day to painfully blinding levels.
I groan, I toss and turn, discontentment running through every vein and aching muscle. Don't get up today, they say, It will be a very bad day to leave such a comfortable bed.
I turn to my side and catch the flash of Lilly's hair, her head resting next to me on the pillow. Like a lighthouse, I draw closer to the safety of her presence, resting my head on her shoulder, smelling her hair, breathing in her pleasant night sweat.
“Good morning, beautiful.” I say, kissing her neck.
She turns around in the bed and faces me, her dark eyes glittering.
“Good morning yourself, handsome!” Akira says with a feral grin.
I scream and fall backwards out of bed inside a tangled mess of sheets that grip my arms and trip me up as I land on the hardwood floor, bruising my rear as I do. Breathless, panicked, I stare up at Akira's tiger eyes as she looks down at me, crawling on the bed to loom above me over the edge of the mattress.
I reply, “What.”
Akira raises her arms above her head and yawns, stretching herself like a cat.
“Man alive, Hisao, Lilly wasn't exaggerating when she said you were great in bed! You were an animal last night! I think you may have bitten me a few times!“
“What?”
On her knees now, Akira gives me a long, slow wink. “Don't worry I won't tell Lilly or Hanako. Although, they might like to hear eventually. If we play our cards right, we could get them to join in.“
“What!?”
I am ever the philosopher.
Akira laughs, sitting on the edge of the bed and arranging her pinstripe jacket back into perfect presentation.
“Calm down, Hisao! It's a joke! I'm playing with you!“
I breath in and out for some time before my racing heart lets me sputter out a few words.
“That's not funny, Akira. I have a condition!”
Akira laughs, hopping out of mine and Lilly's bed , walking around the edge towards me. “You deserve it after all that drinking you did last night.“
“I recall you were there right alongside, encouraging me on.“
I stand up and dust myself off.
Akira shrugs, that playful grin still on her face. “How was I to know you can't handle the good stuff? You think just because you and Kenji can down a bottle of crappy whiskey that you can handle a bottle of real booze with a champion like me? Learn your limits, kid.“
I sigh, rubbing my head and back, one from the hangover still pounding in my head, the other from the recent fall.
“What are you doing here? Where's Lilly?”
Akira looks at me as if the answer was obvious.
“It's the big day, Hisao. Reunion time!”
The memory catches up with me and I slap my forehead, eliciting another fresh white hot burst of pain through my head.
“Oh, no! Today? I was going to buy Lilly a gift!”
Akira looks both surprised and pissed. “You didn't get her anything yet? Hisao, that's not like you at all.“
“I know, I'm usually good at remembering dates and things. But with everything that's been going on and your whole family here, it's just been too hectic!“
Akira smirks, moving over to my closet and opening the door. “Then let's get going! There's no way I'm gonna let something like that ruin the big day.“
Akira begins reaching into my closet and pulling out shirts, pants, ties and jackets, discarding them with a nonchalant hurl over her shoulder, littering the bedroom with my clothes.
“What are you doing? You're making a mess!”
Akira laughs. “ Answered your own question, didn't you? I'm finding you something to wear and not the usual rags you sport.“
With a delighted sound, she pulls a long dark suit off the rack with a wine burgundy dress shirt and tie.
“Perfect!”
She holds it out to me triumphantly.
My mouth curls at the end distastefully. “I hate that suit.”
“Well, I like this suit.”
“Of course you do! You bought it for me!”
Akira groans. “There's no accounting for taste in the younger generation. All of your other suits make you look like a science teacher!“
“I am a science teacher!”
“Not the point!”
She shoves the suit into my hands and walks towards the door.
“What about you?” I ask. “Your going to wear that today?”
She looks down at herself and smoothes her jacket carefully. “What? I always wear this suit to all the most important occasions.“
I chuckle a bit to myself. “Given the occasion, shouldn't you at least put on a dress?“
Akira looks at me very seriously, but her lips twitch with amusement.
“Hisao, I'll be dead before you catch me in some frilly dress number. I have a reputation as a cutthroat lawyer and family pariah to uphold!“
“Not even on this day?”
Akira gives me a Cheshire grin before closing the door behind her.
“This day above any other.”
Muffled from behind the door and down the hallway, I hear her call out.
“Downstairs! Ten minutes! It's shopping time!”
----------------------------------------
The shirt collar digs into my neck and I have to pry under my coat to pull at my tie, getting some air flow again. With Akira next to me in her pinstripes and our floor length dusters, we look like a pair of hit men (excuse me, hit persons) on the way to murder someone.
Something as mundane as gift shopping seems a bit of a let down considering how good we look, I have to eventually admit.
“I told you you look good in that suit.“ Akira says with a sly grin.
I roll my eyes.
“So, got any ideas for a gift for Lilly?,” Akira asks.
I shrug helplessly, lost in my pointless thoughts. “No, not at all. I usually don't have problems finding something Lilly will like, but I'm having a lot of trouble this time around.“
Akira shrugs, her slim shoulders lost in the roomy coat she wears. “Look on the bright side, you'll have plenty of opportunity to make up for it if you screw this one up.“
I look at her with an unappreciative glare. “I'm so glad I brought you along for this.”
“That's what I'm here for, Hisao! To make sure you can handle it! You have a condition, after all!“ She playfully slaps me on the back in a comradely manner.
We spend time in a few stores, browsing for something appropriate for the occasion, but nothing presents itself. Every time Akira finds something that Lilly would like, I'm forced to inform her that I had already bought something similar for her on a previous occasion. The task becomes a very tedious process of hopeful discovery and then depressing denial.
By the afternoon, the two of us are exhausted. Sitting on a bench among the walkways and shopping centers, the sun high above and the shoppers swarming around we present the picture of two wounded warriors, beaten on the battlefield and sent back to our camp, our pride and constitution both equally damaged.
“We'll never find anything at this rate,” I note despondently.
Akira, ever the silver lining, smiles and chuffs me on the shoulder. “That's no way to talk, Hisao! Have you ever given up on anything before? Come on, man up! You can get through this!“
“We only have a few hours now! What are we supposed to do?“
My phone chooses to ring at that particular moment, blast it to hell. I groan, not wanting to pick it up.
I decide to nonetheless. It might be Lilly, after all.
Checking the phone, Akira leans over my shoulder. “Who's calling?”
I check the message and find a text instead of a waiting call. The number is familiar to me.
[Where are you?!]
“It's Shizune, just a second.”
I flip out my keyboard and start typing slowly and carefully with my thumbs.
I hate texting.
[Shopping. Why?]
[Lilly is worried. She headed out early and when she called home you were gone. Is everything okay?]
I sigh. I should have left some sort of message for Lilly or even given her a call. Some part of me though still wants to deny that today is happening.
[Tell her not to worry.] I reply, my thumbs ticking away at the phone's keys. [Everything is okay.]
[You're still going to be here, right? Everyone will be here. Don't miss it!]
I begin to respond when another message pops up.
[Lilly needs you here. The rest of the family is getting to her.]
I cringe, the feeling of my heart shriveling up in my chest sending chills up my spine like a bitter winter storm.
I take a while to respond.
[Tell Lilly I'll be there today. I promise.]
A few moments later I get the final reply.
[Good. Misha says 'Hello'. See you soon.]
I sigh and slip the phone into my pocket. Akira pulls away, having loomed over my shoulder the entire time. “You all right?”
“Yea. Just now I feel like I've been avoiding Lilly all day.“
Akira shrugs. “Maybe you were a little bit. Hell, so was I. You and me kid, neither of us get along well with the rest of the family.“
I nod, standing from the bench, Akira following suit. “Yea, I guess.”
Hands in my pockets and shoulders slumped I begin walking, my head down staring at the concrete.
Akira looks a little uncomfortable with my present mood. Thankfully, she quickly changes the subject. “So, tell me something. I haven't gotten a straight answer from the rest of the family yet. Are Shizune and Misha really....you know?“
She waggles her eyebrows alluringly.
It feels good to laugh.
“Yes, they are. I can confirm it.”
Akira's eyebrows dance upwards. “Hisao, you pervert!” She whispers lasciviously.
“No, nothing like that! They're together, that's it. I asked them myself. Lilly doesn't approve, but she'd never say anything. She and Shizune have already patched up too many bridges to start burning them again now.“
Akira nods sagely and the two of us start walking back towards the car.
“Well, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who's walking a non-traditional route,“ Akira says, ”Nice to know someone else takes some heat from the family once in a while. Burdens aren't so hard to bear if you have someone to bear them with, right Hisao?“
----------------------------------------
Back home, I'm sitting on the couch, the TV mindlessly blaring at me. Akira sits on the chair nearby, sipping from a can of beer she bummed from the fridge.
She looks up at me over the aluminum can. “You're still doing it.” She teases.
I look up a bit surprised that's she's still here. “Doing what?”
“Avoiding the issue.”
I scowl. “I don't need to be chastised by you. You're doing the exact same thing.“
Akira sloshes the can and it's contents back and forth thoughtfully.
“Very true. But it's a proven fact I'll be there. You're the one who's attendance is still up in the air.“
“I said I would go, so I'll go. Despite your family. You have as much reason as me to play hooky.“
Akira nods, killing the can off and tossing it to the carpet in front of the TV. “Yea, I guess. Most of the time unless it's about the business, everyone just looks past me as if I didn't exist. They don't like to acknowledge I'm there.“
“Hey, how do you think I feel? Your father has made it very clear to me he thinks I ruined Lilly's life.“
She points at me with her finger like a loaded weapon. “Never buy into his bull! You are the best thing to happen to each other. He just doesn't like to admit that you weren't part of his perfect plan for Lilly.“
Outside a car door slams shut. Akira looks suddenly guilty and peeks out the window.
“Oh, crap! Lilly is home!”
“What? How?”
“Hanako is driving! Quick, hide!”
“I am not hiding from my wife!” I respond incredulously.
Akira ducks through the hall and hides behind the closet door.
“Just don't tell her I'm here! She'll rat me out to the parents in a second!“
I'm not sure whether to laugh or ridicule her.
I settle for whispering 'coward' under my breath as Lilly walks though the front door, her cane tapping the sides of the wall as she enters.
“Hisao?” She calls out, a bit loud so I could hear her wherever in the house I might be.
“Right here,” I say.
She instantly turns towards the sound of my voice and walks towards the couch.
“What's going on? Where have you been all day?”
I start to answer but then I catch the sight of Akira behind the door, shaking her head vehemently, pleading with her eyes.
I laugh a little.
Lilly tilts her head, confused with a concerned look on her face.
“Hisao, are you all right?”
I wave her off. “Yea, yea, I'm fine. It's just, you know, the last few days have been rough.“
Lilly sighs and sinks into the couch next to me, her head easily finding my shoulder. Her hands reach for mine and we hold each other for a few short moments.
“I know. Everything has happened so fast. I'm sorry that my family has been giving you so much trouble. They're just taking their frustration out on you for no reason.“
“I just needed some time to collect myself, that's all. I was going to buy you a present today, but I ended up just wandering the mall for a couple hours.“
Lilly scoots away and looks towards me with a very serious look.
“What?” I say.
“Hisao,” Lilly says sadly, “I know you well enough. You buy me gifts when you feel like you did something wrong.“
I'm ashamed to admit it, but she's right.
“I just thought I could try and make it up to you...“
She wraps her arms around me and squeezes tight.
“You have done nothing wrong. Nothing that has happened is in any way your fault. I don't care what my family may think.“
I nod, kissing her hair. “They really don't like me.”
“That's not it.” Lilly says, shaking her head and touching my cheek. “They just don't understand. They don't understand us. They get this way every time they get together and I'm usually stuck somewhere in the middle of it all.“
When she sighs, I know that emotion instinctively. I wrap her in another hug and Lilly shudders, suppressing her tears.
“I just don't know what I'm going to do now...”
I stroke her hair and whisper to her soothingly. Without knowing it, I begin humming a song that is played by a little music box upstairs next to our bed . I rock her back and forth, comforting her.
I decide then that I don't care about what her Father or family may think about me.
Lilly needs me, so I'll go through Hell itself for her.
Lilly wipes her tears away and cups my face, kissing me deeply.
“Thank you.” She whispers.
I nod, kissing her back. “I promise I'll be there today.”
She nods. “I know you will.”
Lilly gets up, cane in hand. “Hanako is waiting for me. Will you be coming along?“
I hesitate for a moment. “No, I'll drive myself. I still have a couple things left to get ready.“
Lilly smiles at me, steadfastly knowing I'll soon be behind her.
After she leaves, Akira comes out of her hiding place, nervously rubbing the back of her neck.
“Wow.”
I nod, wiping my eyes. “Yea, wow.”
For the first time, Akira looks guilty. “We spent so much time thinking about ourselves we kind of forgot to be there for Lilly, huh?“
The two of us don't need to say anything more.
We're going.
----------------------------------------
The trees above are alive with cherry blossoms and they rain liberally down, blanketing the park's pathways with a carpet of pink and white. The sun is warm but the suit Akira chose for me breathes pleasantly.
I turn towards her, my eyebrow lifted.
“Promise you won't hit me and I'll say you look nice.“
Akira smiles back at me. “Thank you.”
For the first time ever, I see Akira in a dress. The white fabric is simple but tasteful and hangs off her slim shoulders with a pair of tiny straps. Akira is thin but she has a waif-like cuteness to her when she wants to use it. Her hair is down but still styled, her bangs playfully teasing just above her eyes. Over her arm is a small purse with a silver chain over her pretty shoulder.
“Don't stare too much, Hisao. I might have to tell Lilly we woke up in the same bed this morning.“
I laugh, the two of us walking down the path towards the park, blossoms dancing around the pair of us as we go.
“Thank you, Akira.”
She looks at me a bit confused. “For what?”
“For everything.” I answer earnestly. “You've been there for me and Lilly every step of the way. I don't think we could have made it without you on our side.“
She waves me off, laughing. From her bag she pulls out a beer can and pops the top, taking a sip, reminding me that she is still Akira.
“I didn't do anything important.”
“No, you did.” I interrupt her before she says anything more.
Akira looks surprised at the tone of my voice.
“You were there for us, protecting us, shielding us from your family because you knew they would suffocate me and Lilly. They'd kill us without even knowing it. You kept us alive, Akira. Made what Lilly and I have possible. We're still together because you supported us. So thank you and nothing you say will make me change my mind on this matter.“
Akira looks a bit embarrassed. My sincerity must reach her because I can see just a little color rise in her cheeks and she nods silently, only mouthing the words of 'you're welcome'.
She shakes her head and quickly recovers, the Akira I know once again.
“So, you ready to get thrown into the lion's den?”
I nod. “I am, but you seem nervous. You're still drinking, after all. A little liquid courage before the plunge?“
She smirks, taking another long drag from the can. “You're just jealous you can't drink in front of the family. Good impressions and all.“
With a sly look, Akira fishes another can out of her purse and tosses it to me.
With a wink she says, “Save it for later and make it last.”
I slip it into my pocket, wondering how she was able to fit two cans of beer into her tiny purse.
We sit down on a bench and look up at the pink tree blossom canopy overhead.
“Thank you, Akira.”
She smiles. “You already said that.”
I nod. “Yea, but it bears repeating. You've been the voice of reason for me these past few weeks. Helping me understand what's going on. Without you I would have blown my brains out dealing with your family.“
Akira has a smile that is all teeth as she pokes me in the side. “Just you wait till you start having kids!”
“Ughh, don't remind me!”
Akira laughs, finishing off her can and setting it on the bench next to her. “I warned you, kid. I warned you! I said Lilly had always wanted a big family, didn't I? You have to watch out for those Catholic girls. Pretty soon you'll be counting your kids on more than one hand. And every time a birthday rolls around, you'll have to deal with the family. You won't have me around to take care of you.“
I nod sadly. “You'll be leaving again then?”
Akira sighs, hanging her head back, her neck tracing a pretty line. “Yep. When you're called up, you're called up. I won't be able to take care of you anymore.“
I lean forward, hands clenched in front of me. “Good old Akira, always watching my back, right?”
She nods and smiles warmly towards me. “I have too. That lets you have all the time to watch after Lilly, right?“
I sit up and hug Akira, she returning my embrace.
She whispers to me, “You are the best thing to happen to Lilly and me. I know you can take care of each other without me.“
We pull apart and Akira laughs boisterously to cover up the emotion she's showing.
“Now, time to get ready for the family!”
We stand up, ready to face the coming challenge together.
“Yea!” I say, “We're ready for this.”
“Just remember,” she says, “nothing that's been going on is in any way your fault.“
She takes both my hands.
“Ready?”
“Oh yea,” I reply, “I'm ready for anything now. Bring on the stares and the judgment and the men in suits that cost more than my yearly salary, I'm ready for them.“
A timid voice behind me that could only belong to Hanako breaks my concentration.
“What are you talking about Hisao?”
I turn towards Hanako with a smile. “The sheer ridiculousness of the entire situation. Being looked down upon by people who I've never met before and only know my name through bad family gossip, the usual. Standard fare for the new addition in a family like this“
Hanako stays silent for a second, taking in my response.
“Where do you th...think we are?”
“That's what I'm here for, Hisao! To make sure you can handle it! You have a condition, after all!“
“That's no way to talk, Hisao! Have you ever given up on anything before? Come on, man up! You can get through this!“
“Hisao, I'll be dead before you catch me in some frilly dress number.“
“Burdens aren't so hard to bear if you have someone to bear them with, right Hisao?“
I hesitate for a moment before turning back around and finding myself alone.
I'm not sure what happens next but I turn towards Hanako and she gives me her arm.
I'm leaning on her more than I usually would.
Now I'm sitting in the front row, surrounded by men and women in black.
Me and Hanako are on either side of Lilly and she's crying into my chest, her tears staining my tie.
Now I'm crying.
I find myself later standing at the top of the hill. It has to be later, the sun is starting to go down in the evening sky, painting it with oranges and reds.
The blossoms just keep falling.
I reach into my pocket and pull out a lukewarm can of beer.
Popping the top, I take a long, slow drag from it.
“It's bitter.” I say.
I leave the can on Akira's stone and give her portrait one last look.
“Thank you,” is all I can say.
~Inspired by a post in Katawa Shoujo General on/vg/~
