Trouble at the Nakai Shrine (KS x Touhou)

[Smoku]

Actually I'm a major touhou fan (and by major I mean a REAL major. Touhou posters, touhou wallpapers, all touhou games, fan made games, manga, anime and even pronz, hah). Thus I also work on this kind of scenario along with the Mutou fic. It contains youtube links for music essential during reading the fic (music nearly 100% from touhou 12.3 and 10.5, best listened to with headphones on, during nice evenings alone in your room). I hope you'll enjoy as much as I did, laughing my ass of during the writing process.

For newbs: What is touhou? http://touhou.wikia.com/wiki/Touhou lurk and have fun. Or there is no way you'll understand what the fic's about.
For any other weird words ask google. Or that wiki linked above.


( current music in the background – Usual Days)
Summer at the Nakai Shrine. Hisao Nakai was sweeping the footsteps of the shrine he resided in. He especially kept the areas of the donation box clean. “The cleaner the box, the more donations you can get” said the shrine maiden which resided here before her departure.
That's right, Hisao was just a temporary keeper of the shrine. “temporary” as it was, the shrine maiden hasn't returned from her vacation in ages now. Hisao renamed the shrine from the weird name starting on “H” to Nakai Shrine. Everything else tough remained in the same style as it was in the past: Yin-Yang orbs hanging from the ceiling here and there, the old pretty big and brownish donation box right in the entrance of the shrine itself and the miko quarters, suited for only one person to live in, but big enough to invite a few guests for a few cups of tea. And a pond behind the shrine. In the pond was living a gigantic and very old looking turtle. He even had a beard. The previous shrine maiden said his name was Genji and he hasn't spoken in ages. Hisao wasn't particularly sure the animal was even alive as it was rarely moving and it never left it's pond even for a little while. But he fed the turtle still and everything indicated that turtle was alive since his feed was disappearing as Hisao wasn't looking. He tried to catch the turtle at least on eating but he got bored and gave up after a month. Naturally as he arrived here, the other miko had emptied the storage room leaving only turtle food for Genji.
Hisao kept sweeping mostly out of boredom. Nothing special was going on around. Donations he received were always pathetically low. And he never knew who actually was leaving those coins in the box. He rarely had guests who came to pray at the shrine. Mostly lost travelers, weird natives of Gensokyo and...

“Sup, Hisao” the usual voice was heard behind Hisao's back. He got used to it so much he didn't even turn around to greet the visitor.
“Just sweeping, like usual.” he answered with a sigh of boredom.
“Can ya make me some tea, ze?” the person asked. It was also his usual habit to drink tea with Hisao. He seemed like a pretty bored person too.
“Yea, whatever, come inside” Hisao turned around to the visitor as he made his way towards his miko quarters. The person was none other then Kenji Kirisame. He called himself “The ordinary magician” but he was fair from ordinary. He had stupidly thick glasses on his nose (Hisao always wondered if he can actually see anything through those), a black witch's hat tied with a white ribbon, a black vest on a white shirt with a green bow. He also had a skirt on. And a white apron. Hisao was pretty sure Kenji had his Mary Jane's on his feet as well. He came here on a broomstick, which he proudly held in hands.

(switch music to Argue for and Against )
“You look gay” Hisao summarized Kenji while leaving the broom outside his room.
“Says who, you shrine maiden!” Kenji replied. They were talking like this for a few months now since they met each other.
“I am a shrine MAN. Not maiden. A Shrine man” Hisao started brewing tea.
“And who ever heard of a shrine man? You're not even a priest! You're a substitute shrine maiden, bro.”
“blah blah, shut up”
“Well, my family wears aprons and Mary Jane's for generations. This is a traditional, manly outfit, unlike your crap” Kenji pointed out. He unzipped a little pouch he had on his waist and took out a little bag of biscuits. Snacks, how nice.
“Hey, don't mock the shrine man dress. It reveals my arm pits well and the skirt prevents me from overheating on such warm summer days as this. And the ribbon on the head... is enchanted. Tasty biscuits” Hisao took a biscuit out of the bag and took a bite.
“Whatever. Thanks. Rinnosuke also had new some ones on stock today.” Kenji munched on a cookie he got from a weird little package he showed apart from biscuits.
“What are these new ones you speak of?” Hisao got curious. He lost interest in the regular old biscuits. He took a look at the mysterious package:




“Now this is very weird and colorful” You sure it's edible?” Hisao raised an eyebrow.
“Rinnosuke said they're fine. And they taste great. If you don't want any, I won't make you eat one” Kenji already had a greedy look on his face. Looks like the cookies really were good.
Hisao took three before Kenji managed to devour all.
“Interesting” he said as he tasted the well made yet simple cookie. “I wonder what's written on this package”
“I have no idea. If this is kanji or an ancient language, then I haven't seen any of these ever. Doesn't matter since they're damn tasty.” Kenji ate the last cookie. Hisao brought the tea and they drank, having biscuits and chatting.

.........

Evening came, sun was setting slowly behind the shrine. Hisao got up from the ground near the pond, enjoying the feeling of a grassy field in a hot summer day. He pulled out all weeds he came across during this lazy day. His stomach growled. He didn't have a real lunch today since Kenji left.

(switch the music to – Beautiful Nature Sight)

He left the shrine, taking his gohei ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gohei ) along with him. He had little money on him but he was hungry. Surely someone will have some food for the Nakai shrine mai... shrine man. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. His body stayed in the same place, near a path close to the forests, but his sight moved ways up high to sky with great speed. From up high Hisao saw big parts of Gensokyo, but that wasn't enough. His body swung the gohei a few times in eerie circles and his “sight” located in the sky started seeing in infravision. He pinpointed his target, alongside the road not far away. As he regained his sense of sight, Hisao happily went on his way towards his destination.
He started seeing a faint light close to the road just a few hundred meters ahead. As he got closer, he witnessed a stand. It was a grilled lamprey stand, owned by Mystia Lorelei, a Night Sparrow. Hisao was hungry and a grilled lamprey wasn't a bad idea.
The stand was a lonely little place, moving from time to time around Gensokyo, as Mystia lured wandering travelers, causing night-blindness to them, then selling them grilled lamprey, lifting the effect, claiming that it's the food that cured them. Hisao approached the stand nonchalantly, sat down on a free seat and placed his gohei on the ground. Next to him, sitting there was a tall woman, in a light brown shirt, with red trousers and ankle-long white hair with red and white ribbons. She had a bottle of sake and seemed to finish of her portion of lamprey. The very owner of the stand was chatting with her, happily waving her little pink bird wings, in her usual brown clothing and a blue apron. Looks like there's no crowd today.
Mystia turned to Hisao as he came by to her stand:



“A portion of grilled lamprey for you, Hisao?”
“Yeah, I'm hungry. Make it a big lamprey.” I think I shouldn't eat such food but... ah whatever, it's not like my heart will...
“And you got money to pay for it?” She asked curiously. Hisao rolled all his coins on the counter. “That's a little low...” She said with a little sound of sadness in her melodic voice. Hisao looked straight in her eyes.
“You know... Maybe I'd like a fried chicken instead...” he said with an evil grin.
“O-oh, n-n-n-o! It's fine, one big grilled lamprey coming right up” Mystia jumped with fear and turned around to grill a lamprey for the one of the Nakai shrine.
Hisao turned his attention towards the woman next to him. Her sake bottle seemed near empty and she seamed a little tipsy, judging by her look. She took out a cigarette out of a pocket of her overalls and lit it. With fire from her hand. Naturally, as expected from Fujiwara no Akira, an immortal with the power to control fire. And the biggest smoker in Gensokyo.
( switch to Drunk as I Like- )
“Whatcha lookin' at, shrine maiden?” Akira asked as she noticed Hisao staring at her for a bit longer time.
“N-Nothing” Hisao quickly looked in a different direction. He didn't fear Akira. She was just pretty creepy. She rarely talked with anyone. This stand was the only place Hisao ever saw her.
Mystia brought the grilled lamprey and Hisao began to chew on in silence. The Night sparrow went back to Akira and started talking.
“Thanks for waiting. You know, I had this really handsome visitor a few days ago...” blah blah blah. Mystia kept talking on and on. Akira seemed to ignore her, just sitting there, staring at nothing in particular, but that didn't seem to bother the bird youkai at all.
Hisao nearly finished his meal when Akira got up from her seat, leaving her bottle on the counter.
“I'm goin'” she announced to Mystia and made her way towards the woods in the night.
“Oh, okay. See you!” Mystia happily waved to Akira. She seemed to enjoy Akira's company. What a weird type of friendship...
I waved goodbye to Mystia. He waved me back with a little trembling hand.

(Stop the music)

That was another day of the shrine mai... Man of the Nakai shrine.

(Yes, I'm totally into it. To be continued, naturally.)

[Sgt_Frog]

Someone really needs to do drawings of Hisao (as Reimu) and Kenji (as Marisa)

[kosherbacon]

Between this and the buttloads of yuri Touhou comics there are, it seems that I'm really running out of excuses to remain unfamiliar with the games, huh?

Btw, it seems that one of your images is dead.

[Smoku]

Btw, it seems that one of your images is dead.

Fixed.
Yea, try them out. tough the fandom will give loads of more fun when you get back from playing the games with tears/rage of where are ya stuck at. No, really. I haven't passed a single one (except the fighting games, on lunatic...) without loosing one continuation (mind you, winning without failing a continuation means extra stage and unlocking stuff).
Part two coming soon. This is one of the only things I can write and write and write about all day long.

[Leotrak]

I'm wondering how you'll introduce the other KS characters...

[Smoku]

Next part
( – Usual Days. Again)

Morning sunlight had brutally hit Hisao in his face. He woke up with a yawn, rubbed his eyes and got up. Daily chores as always were ahead of him. He lost hope that the previous miko would return so he started feeling here totally at home. Months had passed and he didn't know a lot natives in Gensokyo still. He figured a time to meet them has come. But he wasn't in a hurry.
He made some breakfast. It's a good thing he could buy all he needed from the human village nearby. People respected him tough probably didn't see his dress appropriate for a man. He didn't care. He remembered the day when he was forced to wear this despite his will... by that creepy gap youkai woman, of all people.
She said, on the next day the last shrine maiden left, that I must wear this, because that's the rules. Hisao asked about the rules but he didn't receive a clear answer. The woman looked at him with glowing red eyes and said that the barrier between Gensokyo and the outer world would collapse, destroying both places if he wouldn't wear the ribbon, the dress and all that... And he was pretty sure she wasn't fooling around. Or was she...? Well, Hisao found the dress pretty functional and the job peaceful enough. He was told that he must “resolve incidents” but nothing major happened. He didn't need to manage the human village, because that hakutaku teacher was there, taking care of every little thing that came up. He didn't have to do anything around the forest because the forest trembled each time you said the name “Kenji” out too loud. Just what was the man doing there...?
So what was Hisao supposed to do except sweeping dust from the Nakai Shrine and feeding the old fart turtle? Laze off. And....
“Oh, yoohoo”
... accept weird guests.
A female voice was heard out of nowhere as Hisao swept the shrine.
“Yikes!” he cried when the space in the middle of the shrine started distorting and moving in a weird way. In the very same spot opened a gap, increasing in size rapidly. Hisao dropped the broom and it got sucked into the gap. He wanted to reach for it but he was met with a whole bunch of creepy eyes looking at him from the eerie space inside the extraordinary warp gate. He had no idea who or what was the owner of the mysterious eyeballs but he was slowly expecting of who will come out next.
(Stop the music)
“ “ laughed the voice as Hisao was getting up with a depressed sigh.

(Switch the music to - Sky of Scarlet Perception )

Of the darkness of the gap emerged a woman dressed in an elegant white dress, purple in the middle all the way from the neck down to her legs. She had a stylish umbrella in her hand, fitting the dress. Her long blond her were falling down her slender shoulders in a remarkable play with the morning light. The woman fully came out of the gap, snapped her fingers and the most strange distortion disappeared like it was never there. She checked her white mob cap with a red ribbon tied on it's front and then she took out a small fan, also in the colors of her dress, and started waving a little, probably just for show.
She opened her closed till now eyes, revealing that one was golden and the other- blue. They seemed empty tough. Hisao new well enough that she was blind. But that fact didn't bother her to look straight into the shrine man's own eyes. As if blindness was nothing.
“Lilly Yakumo” stated Hisao.
“Just as you say. Hello there, little shrine maiden” Lilly grinned with an evil look on her face.

(And now to – Swing a Fish to Drive Away Flies)

“Just WHAT did you call me!?” Hisao burst into anger.
“A little shrine maiden. Oh, wait... you are a shrine MAN” Lilly teased.
“Pah” he just shrugged at the mean comment, as his little anger gone away with the wind. She wasn't a bad looking youkai. “Don't surprise me like that, I have a weak heart, you know... What brings you here?” He took a look at the youkai. He stopped his sight at some... particular places here and there.
“My face is up here, Nakai” Lilly couldn't help but smile.
“Oi, aren't you blind?”
“I am. In these two eyes. But who said I see you with them?”
Hisao looked around to find anything suspicious, like mini gaps with eyes, but he didn't find anything so he just decided to go with the flow.
“You didn't answer my question” He said and turned around to make some tea for the sudden guest.
“Tea? How thoughtful of you, thank you. Is this how you greet a fellow co-worker? With shouts and impoliteness?” she still waved the fan as she spoke.
Hisao ignored the question most obviously aiming to tease him even more. He couldn't deny tough that he could call her a “co-worker”. She was THE gap youkai. She had the barrier between worlds under her control and Hisao read in a “How to be a shrine maiden for dummies” manual that one of his jobs is to maintain this barrier stable and functional, avoiding any major dimensional distortion of time and space. The manual didn't say anything about the powerful natives of Gensokyo being able to manipulate godlike powers.
As the tea was made, Hisao took a seat on of the shrine steps and invited Lilly to do so next to him and handed her a cup of tea. She drank the drink slowly, enjoying herself in this sunny summer morning.
“I just dropped by for a visit to see how's it going, mr. Substitute”
“Fine. Any words about the owner of this shrine?”
“Nope”
“Not if that surprises me.” Hisao sipped his tea calmly.
“She has too much fun in the outer world...” Lilly murmured.
“Say what!? You have contact with her?” He looked at the youkai with surprise.
“I have contact with anyone I want, my dear human. With a few exceptions.”
“Like who?”
“She said hi to you and asked if “that bastard gay witch from the forest is still alive”. He is, isn't he?”
“Yeah... What is she doing in the outer world?”
“Enjoying herself. I lent her one of my mansions in a land called Japan and showed her around. She really got hooked on those game and anime things”
“I have no idea what are you talking about but I guess she's alright then. Good to know she's still alive out there.”

Hisao and Lilly finished their tea. They didn't talk much and they liked it that way.
“Oh, she's coming” said Hisao. Lilly indeed sensed something approaching in a great speed towards the shrine.
After a few seconds a woman came flying towards the shrine. She had black crow wings growing from her back and was dressed in a white blouse and a short black skirt with brown leaf motives. She had a black bag filled with newspaper and that little thing to make pictures. Her semi-long hair in the color of her wings fluttered amusingly as she was in sight of the pair.



“Daily Bunbunmaru newspaper!” She yelled as she skillfully threw one of the newspapers towards Hisao's direction. He stood up to pick it up as it lied close by.
The girl in the air stopped for a moment tough, seeing Lilly and immediately pointed the little thing towards the two.
“Oh, a lovey-dovey couple! Say cheeese” and some light flashed at us from her little item.
“Hey, what the-” Hisao pointed his newspaper at her with anger.
“Haha, these'll be on the first page tomorrow!” She announced happily flying around in the air.
“That does it!” Hisao ran towards the shrine, blushing, in Lilly's amusement, and picked up his gohei. He pointed it towards the flying crow girl “Buzz off, Aya, or I'll have roasted tengu for lunch” and a small sized yin-yang orb materialized and quickly flew towards the one called “Aya”.
“Ayayaya, ok, ok, I'm going already! Sheesh! No respect for journalists”
“You mean paparazzis” Hisao pointed out and again pointed the gohei to Aya. She noticed it and flew away laughing and screaming something about tomorrow's first page.
Hisao went back to Lilly “Stupid Shameimaru... *grumble grumble*”. Lilly just laughed everything of.
“Fufufu, you're blushing”
“Sh-shut up” Hisao hid his face from the youkai in the newspaper. He really did blush.
“You're holding it upside down too”
“N-no, I'm not!” He turned around the paper and decided to check out the news.

(switch to Drunk as I Like )

The first page was littered with all kinds of stupid headlines. The main one was “Dirty secrets of the Scarlet Devil Mansion revealed! Page 2”. The article was mostly about suspecting of lesbian relationships between maid employees of a place called the Scarlet Devil Mansion. It included an interview with the head maid as well. Nothing interesting, just another piece of lies brewed by Aya Shameimaru, stupid crow tengu of the youkai mountain.
It was mostly lies but it was fun to read. The paper included even scandalous and embarrassing photos of some of Gensokyo's famous people. Sometimes the tengu came by to the shrine looking for scoops. When she didn't have anything to write on, she wrote about the work at the shrine, about scandalous lazing of of the main shrine maiden (the only one actually and it's shrine MAN).
The paper contained even a corner for items from the outer world. This edition had a box thingy called “a cellphone” which allowed communication with other cellphones. What a useless device. The most simple of spells allow you to communicate with others in many ways without the requirement of possessing such a thing.

Suddenly Lilly let out a strange melody out of herself. It seemed to be coming from her body. Hisao stopped reading and shifted his attention to her. She took out a small box out of her dress, looking somewhat similar tot he one in the Bunbunmaru.
“Hello? Ah, Hello, Ran. Anything going wrong?” Yukari talked to the box. How weird. “How's Chen doing” She asked another question after a while. Hisao heard faint sounds of a voice coming from the box “That's good. I'll be back on time for lunch. See you! Isn't this device fun! Haha, you'll thank me home. Bye” And she hid the thing in her dress again.
“What?” She noticed Hisao staring.
“No, nothing.”

Time passed by lazily as Hisao read his daily newspaper, one of the most interesting parts of a regular days, and Lilly bathed in the sun.
“LOOOOOOOK OOOOOUUUUTT!!!” a loud shout was heard from afar only to see a giant metal object flying towards him with impressive speed. It had a funny grin and eyes drawn on it's tip, imitating a face. And it was closing in fast. Something told Hisao to move, but he wasn't fast enough...

(To be continued)

[Mirage_GSM]

So this is... basically R-Type with a story that goes beyond "kill all the aliens" and many bishoujo characters?
Sounds interesting. Also looks like there's loads of games to choose from.
Any tips where to start as a beginner or where to find the games? Preferably an english version?

Regarding the story... Well, I can't really say much about it, except that I'm pretty lost so far, not knowing anything about the characters or the background.
You switch between referring to Hisao as "I" and "he" a few times and a few tenses are mixed up, but nothing major.

[Smoku]

You switch between referring to Hisao as "I" and "he" a few times

whoops.

To start your journey through touhou it would be best if you'd try out the basic games out there- touhou 1-5 are on a thing called PC 98, which you need an emulator to work. the rest is on regular windows. I recommend touhou 6 (Embodiment of the Scarlet Devil) for a start. Downloading the stuff is officially illegal (but how in the world you'd get that legally...) but finding any links on the internet should be a piece of cake. Among the official works that consist of shooting games (ever played galaxian or something? Then you'll like it), photo-shooting games ("Shoot the Bullet" or "Double Spoiler", which are a basicly a little different type of shooting games) and fighting games ("Scarlet Weather Rhapsody" and "Unthinkable Natural Law" are awesome). English patches available on the Touhou Wiki.
But that's just a little part. To have fun to the fullest you'll need to explore the creations of fans. Touhou gathered a SUPERB amount of fans all over the world. Browse such pages as Danbooru, Gelbooru, Konachan.com for thousands of images of characters.
There's even manga and anime about this (thought the anime is amateur stuff). http://www.mangafox.com/search.php?name=touhou have a read. Some are official work by ZUN- the creator of the games (yup, the games were made just by one guy, solo making EVERYTHING).
Finally, there are fan games. Among the best I ever saw are: Labyrinth of touhou (an RPG game) - http://pooshlmer.com/wakaba/res/467421.html links here, on the OP's post.
Super Marisa World- Super Mario style game
Touhou Pocket War (yet again an RPG but a different kind).

Any other are found on that image board I posted here with the links to Labirynth of touhou.
I believe you want a description of the world and basic characters as well. http://touhou.wikia.com/wiki/Gensokyo this is the world- gensokyo. I see an enormous article here, so I guess that's a fairly good start too. Enjoy.

[Leotrak]

Rut-roh O.o

DUCK!


One thing I keep seeing: "tough" instead of "though" >_> But since that's supposedly a common mistake for non-native english folks, it's not that big a nuisance <_<

[Smoku]

Huh, since I'm sticking in this some art and music maybe I should state something obvious: These are not my creations. They were made by a lot more awesome people then me etc. etc.

(Music to – The Ground is Yellow)
The strange steel thing with a face was dangerously closing in to Hisao's location. As the, uh, shrine man got up and prepared a quick barrier spell in his mind, a gap opened with great speed between him and the strange projectile.
The thing got sucked inside the abyss like dust by a vacuum cleaner. Miko guy took a look behind him just to see Lilly sitting on her spot, hiding half of her face behind her fan, her eyes burning red. There is no way the warp gap wasn't her doing.
“Th-Thanks, Lilly” Hisao quickly thanked her and jumped with his gohei in hand towards the direction where the mysterious missile thing came from. Just down the hill where the shrine was located, he noticed someone on the other side of the road. The person seemed to be a small blue-haired girl in a blue dress with a golden key tied with a few straps on her chest. There were a lot of strange pieces of steel scattered around her, but in her hands Hisao noticed something you could compare to a cannon. It seemed some kind of a mobile, yet big cannon. Either way, there was smoke coming out from it and it looked like it could fit an iron missile thingy, which stated who the culprit of this bold attack was.
The keeper of the Nakai shrine ignored the fact that the girl looked rather surprised and confused. She was pointing that thing at him. Hisao flew, using magical power, down the stairs following to the shrine and without a word let out a yin-yang orb, made purely out of magical energy. It accurately made it's way towards the opponent but finally it didn't reach her. The orb bounced of the girl, revealing that she was surrounded by a strange barrier. She regained her resolve.
“Hey, wait!” she yelled to Hisao, but he didn't listen. His leisure time was brutally interrupted.
She took out an enormously long object out of her backpack, which she appeared to have on her back. It was way longer then the pack seemed to be.



Then she closed one of the item's ends to her right eye, aiming the second end at Hisao. He was trained in shrine maiden arts, but he never saw anything like this before. He surrounded himself using a Nakai Barrier Spell, expecting an attack. The girl's item let out a loud noise, but nothing was seen. At the very second the sound was heard though, Hisao felt an impact on his barrier. An impact so strong, the barrier nearly crumbled as he barely held his concentration. Inside the barrier was a little metal object. Presumably, a bullet. It got stuck inside the barrier, piercing through at least a few centimeters of condensed magical energy. Impressive.
Nakai decided to stop screwing around. A second shot at him would prove dangerous, so he took out a few pieces of paper out of his pockets. These were magically imbued seals, which had many combat-wise uses. He threw three at the girl, surprised that her previous attack hasn't done any damage. Before the seals reached her, out of her backpack came out two steel hands, attached to the pack. The mechanical monstrosities quickly knocked the seals away, letting them explode before reaching the girl and her barrier.
And a second later the girl, searching through the pockets of her dress in panic, disappeared. She just vanished. Hisao, still in air, rubbed his eyes in disbelief. What kind of magic is this? He flew close to the still scattered pieces of metal, where the girl was standing before. Some pieces were different from others, just where did they come from and what were they used for? Suddenly Hisao felt a grip on his neck from behind. The robotic hands came out of nowhere and started strangling him. He started having problems breathing. The hands forced him to turn around showing that they were truly coming out of thin air. And before his eyes the girl practically materialized, showing an expression of anger.
“I told you to stop, are you retarded?” She shook her head in dissatisfaction, shaking her little blue twin tails tied up with small red ornaments. Hisao couldn't speak as the steel hands groped his neck rather hard. He felt his face was turning from red to blue as he was suffocating.
“Hey, are you alright? Oh, damn, I'm holding you too hard!” the girl took out another weird item, a little plate with buttons, and pressed one of them. The robotic hands released Hisao from their titanic grip and the miko dropped on the ground, coughing. He welcomed air in his lunges with happiness.

(switch to Argue for and Against. )
“I... I was the one who fired that missile... Sorry.” She confessed as Hisao was regaining senses.
“Why the heck did you do that for!?” He asked. It appeared that Lilly was slowly coming towards them, down the steps following to the shrine. She wasn't in a hurry and seemed like she didn't want to get involved with this issue.
“I was testing my newest invention!” She presented Hisao with the cannon thing she dropped “The XLMS08 Hand cannon! Well... I need to work on it's homing mechanism still...”
“But why did you shoot that thing at my shrine!?” Hisao raised his hands in anger. He dropped his gohei on the ground, he didn't care about it anymore.
“I was shooting at the opposite direction, at the forest... But it turned around and decided to fly there instead” She pointed at the forest, then at the opposite direction, the shrine.
Hisao smacked his face with his palm. Whatever this girl was... oh, right. Who or what is she? He examined her closely. Except the dress with a golden key and her backpack, she had a green hat on her head. He looked below... and he noticed that her legs were made of steel.
“What... are these?” he pointed.
“Oh, these?” the girl pulled her dress up to show off her legs. “I made them myself. I can move in them. Neat, huh?” She raised one of her metallic legs. They seemed to have some kind of contraptions installed in them. Hisao decided not to dwell on that issue anymore.
“So, uhm... my name's Hisao Nakai, the shrine man of the Nakai shrine, nice to meet you, I guess.” He raised his hand in a welcoming gesture.
“The shrine... man?” She made a surprised face, shaking Hisao's hand in response to his welcome. “Yea... Well, anyway, my name's Emi Kawashiro, the best kappa engineer around, at your service”.
“And... what's this thing you attacked me with in the first place?” he pointed at the long thing.
“Ah, this is a simple FALCON sniper rifle. A pretty cool thingy, isn't it? I upgraded it with a built-in Optical Camouflage device, allowing me to turn invisible, as you probably noticed”
“Falcon...? Doesn't look like a bird to me... Ah, cool magic tough, Emi. Maybe you'd like to join me and Lilly for tea at the shrine?” Hisao showed the incoming youkai to Emi. Lilly's eyes returned to normal as she was closing to the location of the two.
Emi noticed the elegant woman.
“A-Ah, no, thank you... You see, I'm pretty busy with experimenting with new devices. I came here for the first time on field training. Thanks for the offer tough” She said as she hid all her stuff in her tiny backpack. How did all that got in there...?
“Are you refusing his kind offer, little girl?” Lilly spoke and grinned, showing of her white teeth in a wicked smile. Emi felt cold sweat running down her spine as the blond woman smiled at her. She got an impression that her empty eyes would suck her inside at any moment. She even forgot about her missile and didn't bother to ask about it's whereabouts.
She waved goodbye to Hisao and Lilly and ran into the woods.
“Nice job scaring her off, Lilly.”
“Sorry~” She happily replied. She wasn't sorry at all.
“And how am I supposed to socialize with people if they run away in fear, huh?” Hisao passed Lilly and headed back to the shrine. She followed him, enjoying herself.
They had another cup of tea when they got back.

“You know, you could ask your witch friend, Kenji: he could introduce you to a few people so you could get around and get to know natives of Gensokyo a little better” Lilly suggested as they lazily chatted, enjoying the rest of the day.
“Hey, that's not a bad idea. Thanks, Lilly. I'll do so when he drops by” Hisao got fired up. Days were just going to get exciting.

....

(music to “Love-colored magic” - )

Lilly vanished soon in one of her wicked gaps, saying something about supper with her shikigamis and after a while Kenji showed up in his regular manner. He landed with his broomstick near Hisao's living quarters.
“Yo, Hisao. Sup?” He greeted the shrine mai.. shrine man cheerfully.
“Hello, Kenji. I wanted to talk to you”
“Why so serious, ze~?”
“You know, I'm here a while now... I'd like to meet new people around here, see new places...” Hisao talked nearly daydreaming while he brewed some red tea for Kenji.
“I ain't enough for ya?”Kenji seemed a little angry. What, doesn't Nakai have enough friends? He knows the bros of Gensokyo already! He knows him, the Ordinary manly magician. He knows Rinnosuke at the Kourindou shop. He knows that wise ass were-teacher, Kamishirasawa Akio, from a nearby human village. Oh, wait...

“Yea, man, I think I can give you a little tour and meet up with people. Tell me though who did ya met already?” He asked as he drank his tea. Kenji liked red tea, especially the one brewed by Hisao. Was way better then that “instant coffee” crap made by Kourin.
“Well, I know Lilly.” Hisao pointed out
Ah, the gap bitch... Kenji thought.
“Oh, and I met a strange blue-haired girl today. She said her name was Emi and that she was a kappa, whatever that is” Hisao tilted his head.
“The little river engineer. Yea, I know that one. Crafty, artificial legs, cool devices, nothin' to steal...” the magician went on, as he noticed something dangerous slipped by his mouth. Hisao raised an eyebrow.
“W-well! She's not wealthy, yeah, that's what I meant. Ah, saves me the trouble to introduce you! Come on, we have a few people to meet” He jumped on his broom with haste, avoiding further dwelling in his little kleptomaniac interests.
“Oi, wait up!” Hisao flew right behind the not-so-ordinary magician.

They flew above the Forest of Magic were Hisao heard that Kenji lives in.
“I'm gonna introduce ya to my neighbor, Rin Margatroid. She's a weirdo but being with her is a blast” magician filled Hisao in.

Kenji's neighbor, from the Forest of Magic, huh...?

(to be continued)

[Mirage_GSM]

You used a Simple past a few times where past perfect would have been appropriate and "The orb bounced of the girl" needs one more "F".
In the meantime I had a look at one of the games I think it was Part 6...
For one thing it's ridiculously difficult. Even on easy, I wasn't able to get past the second boss.
The "story" was limited to a few sentences of conversation when meeting a boss and half of that was about the weather. ^^°
This weekend I saw an AMV, allegedly with scenes from Touhou... Is there an Anime about it?

[Smoku]

Some people tried making an anime. it had one episode... And they dropped it, cause ZUN didn't like it. no idea where to find it anymore though.

Try doujins. Like, let's say "Koishi the Loving Gourmet" or some original work like http://touhou.wikia.com/wiki/Curiosities_of_Lotus_Asia
or Strange and Bright Nature Deity. They're not focused on combat but rather on different aspects.
Games won't get you far unless you actually win them (which is hell).

[kosherbacon]

Try doujins.

There's probably several hundred Touhou doujins right here.

[Smoku]

I tried to construct a simple guide for someone who wants to know more about this... but it's just impossible. I get continuously charmed by all kinds of fandoms aspects and creations (I also get disgusted by others, but that's another story).

It gets a lot of time to get to know all, like, 150 characters and understand meemees, details... I have no idea how I got to such a state in these few months.

[Dekiel]

My goodness Pieguski!
Now tell me where is the hole to gensoukyou,
it seems everything we need is already there!

A tak na marginesie, nie bylbys Smoku zainteresowany pomocą w polskim tłumaczeniu KS?
[Mamy braki w personelu].