Kenji's Secret Files (upd 20220525 'RedJack')

[brythain]

To: Nakai H.

Operative Nakai, this is Agent Setou.

Kapora, what kind of name is that? Obviously foreign. She lurks on the far side of your class and she looks down her sharp, dark nose at everybody else. She is clearly a pawn of a foreign power. And a feminist too!

This is what I have to say. Her personal name is not the unpronounceable gibberish you think it is. Just call her ‘Moriko’. It’s a good Japanese name, and it’s the one her mother gave to her. Her father is the foreigner, from some place very far south.

Remember that debate we had about Satou’s ancestry? Well, this one is worse. I found out she’s actually exempted from English classes because it is her first language! But she attends them anyway. She scores very highly in all her tests, just rubbing our noses in our inability to handle her cursed but necessary language. She should be as good in her mother’s tongue.

Kapora (ugh, what a terrible name) is terrifyingly augmented. Each step she takes primes her weapons. You can hear them locking on from some distance away. You’ll be sorry if you get in range of those things, I can tell. Some days, she wears properly concealing plastiflesh over her titanium legbones. Some days, she goes without, and pretends they are aluminium. She can’t be that light.

Sometimes you will catch her coolly staring at you. She has optical recording, I bet. You need to find out more, but don’t let her pin you down. She looks capable of anything. And she never smiles.

I wish you all the best in your pursuit of manly excellence.

Honour and power!
Setou K.

Editor's Note: It took me some time to recognize the name of the subject as transcribed by the author. But the location, diagonally opposite where I used to sit, is a dead giveaway. As is the rest of the description. [N, ISS]

[AntonSlavik020]

The last one is the only one I don't know who she is. I don't read every fanfic on this site, so maybe she's from one of them?

[brythain]

The last one is the only one I don't know who she is. I don't read every fanfic on this site, so maybe she's from one of them?

'Molly Kapur' (or 'Moriko Kapora' to give her a more Japanese name) is a side character who's not explicitly mentioned in the VN — if you look at the class photo, the dark girl on the far right hand side as you face the class. She also appears on the right, with a boy, in the good ending to Hanako's route. Meanwhile, Kagami Takahashi is an original character invented by forgetmenot.

[Serviam]

One of her eyes will freeze you in your tracks. The other will heat your balls to bursting point and unman you totally. You can tell which is which from the colours: one is dark brown, a normal eye, until you realize it is darker than usual; the other is golden, its colour ablated by years of dangerously focused radiation. She will sterilize you if she gets the chance, neuter you, vaporize your love-life!

Editor's Note: This editor pondered long and hard over this document. Clearly, to not publish it would appear self-serving. But releasing a matter between people who have become close friends, that is always a difficult thing. Personally, I blush to have been so highly thought of in the past, in whatever misguided ways. [N, ISS]

Ouch. *winces*

And Kenji's description of Molly...sound like Emi as a killbot. That is its own uneasy feeling.

[brythain]

And Kenji's description of Molly...sound like Emi as a killbot. That is its own uneasy feeling.

In my headcanon, Kenji spent a lot of time on research. He may have used his legally blind status as an excuse to examine girls' legs to see if they were fembots or not.

[AntonSlavik020]

The last one is the only one I don't know who she is. I don't read every fanfic on this site, so maybe she's from one of them?

'Molly Kapur' (or 'Moriko Kapora' to give her a more Japanese name) is a side character who's not explicitly mentioned in the VN — if you look at the class photo, the dark girl on the far right hand side as you face the class. She also appears on the right, with a boy, in the good ending to Hanako's route. Meanwhile, Kagami Takahashi is an original character invented by forgetmenot.

I know who Molly is, I just didn't make the connection.

[brythain]

The last one is the only one I don't know who she is. I don't read every fanfic on this site, so maybe she's from one of them?

'Molly Kapur' (or 'Moriko Kapora' to give her a more Japanese name) is a side character who's not explicitly mentioned in the VN — if you look at the class photo, the dark girl on the far right hand side as you face the class. She also appears on the right, with a boy, in the good ending to Hanako's route. Meanwhile, Kagami Takahashi is an original character invented by forgetmenot.

I know who Molly is, I just didn't make the connection.

Sorry I misunderstood you. I guess this is how Molly's name was written in Japanese characters.

[brythain]

This fragment was extracted from Disk 1 and is labelled Fragment 01-17.
Success with Disk 1 took much longer than success with Disk 3, hence the order of extraction.
Apparently, Disk 1 was about food. See below.

To: Self
Re: Mint Jelly

I wake up and I can still taste it.

First you order a Margharita pizza. I think this is how you spell it. Whatever. It’s the one with the plain cheese and tomato. If they put anything else on it, something is wrong. Unless it is pepperoni, or some other thinly-sliced salted meat.

Then you put the mint jelly on top. This is green stuff. I thought it was seaweed at first. This is what happens when you don’t read the label properly.

But good things also happen when you don’t read properly. Mint jelly is cold and sweet, even when it’s warm. It gets into you and you feel tingly all over. Especially if you put a lot on top of the pizza. A lot. It is cool. Green coldness on yellow and red. Somebody’s national flag, although not Italy.

Is delicious. But the next day, you wake up and you are in love. Then you go to the toilet and feel funny.

Honour and power!
Setou K.

[brythain]

This fragment was extracted from Disk 1 and is labelled Fragment 01-03.
Success with Disk 1 took much longer than success with Disk 3, hence the order of extraction.
Apparently, Disk 1 was about food. See below.

To: Self
Re: Blueberry Marshmallows

Today I melted marshmallows over my pizza base after scraping off the cheese. (You can toast the scraped-off cheese until it is crispy, it is very good. But then you have no more cheese on your pizza. I tried butter but it doesn’t work.)

It was all white, with a few brown spots. It looked too plain. I put some mini marshmallows in some places, tried to make snow-people. Damn feminists won’t allow me to make snowmen.

But that’s wrong. So I made the snow-people pregnant. I carved little holes in the little marshmallows. In each one I put a blueberry. You can buy them at the supermarket in little punny things.

Then I put on my foil suit and turned on the microwave. It was glorious beyond expectation. I did not expect the snow-people to explode like that. It was like alien parasites. I must do it again.

Oh yes, it tasted very nice. Not too sweet, but sweet.

Honour and power!
Setou K.

[brythain]

This fragment was extracted from Disk 1 and is labelled Fragment 01-39.
It contains three sections, only one intact and displayed below.
The other two seem to be about blueberries with salmon and wasabi prawns with pineapple, but not enough has been recovered yet.

To: Self
Re: Raspberry & Yellowtail

If you fall in love it’s bad because the feminists have control over your manly parts and that’s not good. But I found a way to get the feels without this happening.

What you do is order a raspberry & yellowtail pizza. The yellowtail is a fish, we call it hamachi. It is a mellow fish, as if you fed it whisky before you sliced it up. The raspberry is a funny fruit that tastes opposite to the fish, so it goes together well. In fact it goes together even better than eating the two separately.

Imagine a faintly delicious fish swimming around your mouth while berries touch the top and bottom of your tongue. It’s like sex, but better because you feel full after doing it, and also happy.

Honour and power!
Setou K.

[brythain]

This fragment was extracted from Disk 1 and was part of Fragment 01-39, but now labelled separately as 01-40.
It is the second of three contiguous fragments.
Formerly thought to be about blueberries with salmon, it is actually something different.
Existence of this item, as with the rest, has been verified independently.

To: Self

Re: Blueberry & Tuna with Yogurt Sauce

There’s an island between my great country and the two-part former colony. On that island is a pizza shop where the ungrateful former colonists somehow make good pizza.

The best one is a tuna pizza with blueberry jam and sour milk sauce. What they do is shred the cooked tuna meat into long crispy chunks, and make a normal cheese pizza with that. Then they take the kind of blueberry jam that has more blueberries than jam and spread it around. Then they place some blobs of white yogurt instead of mayonnaise, and add small salad leaves.

It's red, white and blue. But who cares?

It’s a full meal! It is nutritious, delicious, and good for your adolescent sex drive. That last part I heard about from a classmate.

Honour and power!
Setou K.

[brythain]

This fragment was extracted from Disk 1 and was part of Fragment 01-39, but now labelled separately as 01-41.
It is the third of three contiguous fragments.
It seems to be about a rather revolting variant which the author seemed to enjoy.
Existence of this item, as with the rest, has been verified independently.

To: Self

Re: Jackfruit Hawaiian with Smoked Salmon Pastrami

There’s an island between my great country and the two-part former colony. On that island is a pizza shop where the ungrateful former colonists somehow make good pizza. I have been trying many varieties.

Today I ate a Hawaiian pizza. Let me tell you what 'Hawaiian' means, it means they take thick chunks of American ham and sad pineapple and make a pervert pizza of it. But today's pizza is real Islander: it is made from jackfruit, which has a really strange sick sweet crunchy taste, instead of the pineapple, and real ham made from real cows, which can't be right.

But the topping is smoked salmon slices that have been marinaded in peppercorns until the grease is peppery and the meat is firm. And the cheese is halfway between mayo and hard cheese. That is crazy!

It’s a great meal! If we Japanese made more such pizzas, we would rule the world!

Honour and power!
Setou K.

[Serviam]

Wait, they do that in Jeju?

[brythain]

Wait, they do that in Jeju?

Yes, indeed! And elsewhere. I am still finding new flavours as I follow Kenji's trail through east Asia.

[Oddball]

In the regular files, not the fragments, you present Kenji in an interesting way. He seems less like his typical paranoid self and more along the lines of a Lovecraft protagonist. Somebody calm and serious, but who has seem some real nasty stuff and is slowly loosing his grip. It's an interesting feel for the character.