Part Four:
(
Here’s the trailer for fun)
George raised an eyebrow at the screen, “How is this like the book? We’re in California.”
I shrugged, “I just like this version the most. The Spielberg version gets the whole survivor angle better, and there is a version that was faithful to the book, but that version sucked and Spielberg just fell flat for some reason.”
“When do the Martians show up?” Sarah asked.
“Later,” I replied.
Sarah rolled her eyes and sipped her beer. How she remained conscious I have no idea.
“I wouldn’t mind a proper try at a faithful version,” George remarked.
“I just want the
Thunder Child scene done properly once,” I declared, “and I don’t mean in music form, because so far Jeff Wayne has the award.”
“Yikes,” Kenji griped, “it’s like we’re in Kobe with all these hicks on screen.”
“Now I want steak,” Oji stated.
I raised an eyebrow at him, “How stoned are you?”
“I am very aware of my heart pumping blood right now.”
“Me, too,” Sarah added, “although I don’t smoke –the department does random drug testing in case we’re stealing supplies. And for use in class.”
Kenji grinned, “I know my next article now.”
I sighed and sipped my beer.
==(
Here’s the scene if you want it)
“Oh,” Sarah blanched, “Um… wow.”
George snorted, “Fuck, the Brits did better.”
“They didn’t have shields a century ago,” Oji remarked.
Sarah turned to me, “Are mesons a real thing?”
Oji and I nodded, and I replied, “Yes. They are, in fact, a thing.”
“…Neat.”
“Definitely not an even fight,” George declared.
“’Bows and arrows against the lightning,’” I quoted.
“Fuckin’ aliens,” Sarah grumbled, “always fuckin’ up our planet.”
“Right!” Kenji snapped and pointed at the screen, “This is our planet! If anyone’s gonna fuck it up, it’s gonna be us!”
Sarah nodded and drained her latest drink. She had started swaying in her seat, reminding me a bit of a metronome if it was drunk.
“Speakin’ a’ aliens,” Sarah remarked, “do we ever get to see one?”
I smirked and pointed to the screen, “Soon.”
==
Fortunately Drunk Sarah didn’t fall for jump scares easily, though she did yelp at the reveal of the Martian.
“Huh,” George grunted, “I think I like the book version better. Those things look weird.”
I raised an eyebrow, “And a bear sized octopus monster isn’t weird?”
George shrugged, conceding the point.
“Fuckin’ aliens,” Sarah grumbled, “can’t they just terraform some rock somewhere and call that home? Why invade a planet with a bunch of fuckwits like us already on it?”
“Because aliens are stupid,” Kenji replied, “and they should feel stupid, and will feel stupid when we find them and fuck them up with Apple viruses and a nuke up their ass!”
George opened his mouth, closed it, and sipped his beer.
Sarah nodded and drained her latest beer. Apparently deciding she’d had enough for a while, she asked George to pass her a bottled water.
“So who wants to bet if the nuke will work?” Oji asked.
Kenji drained his shot and snorted. I took a moment to compliment his timing, since scotch up the nose is not a pleasant experience.
“When does the nuke ever work?” he griped, “Didn’t work in
Independence Day, won’t work now.”
Sarah opened the bottled water and remarked, “You guys watch a lot of foreign films.”
“They worked in
New Millennium,” I retorted, “although so did bread mold….”
“Hey,” Oji turned to me, “I just had a brilliant moment of realization: are they why Hanako’s hair is purple?”
It took me a moment to realize what he meant, but when I connected the dots I nodded.
==
“There,” Kenji gestured at the screen, the light from the TV reflecting off his glasses as he triumphantly posed in his chair, “Told you the nuke wouldn’t work!”
Sarah sipped her water, looking contemplative, “Anemic huh. How tiring.”
I glanced at her and raised an eyebrow, “…Did you just make a medical joke?”
Sarah smiled, but said nothing.
“Didn’t take long for civilization to collapse,” Oji observed.
“Mindless sheep,” Kenji declared, “Dangerous for their own stupidity.”
“You know,” George said, “not everything is a social commentary on the failures of the human psyche.”
Kenji glared at George and opened his mouth to retort, so George shoved a slice of pizza into it to save us the diatribe, at least for a minute or two.
==
“Well,” George said as the movie ended, “that happened. I question the idea to twist Wells’ secularism into something so blatantly pro-religion.”
Kenji turned to me, “When was this movie made?”
I shrugged, “1950’s, I think.”
Kenji raised a hand in the air, “Well there you go! Those fuckin’ Commie’s were godless assholes, so the Westerners had to be God-fearing motherfuckers to stop ‘em!”
Sarah nodded, “He’s got a point.”
“Well,” I hefted myself up, “hope you all had fun, and have a good night. Kenji, pass out on the floor.”
“Will do!” Kenji fell out of his chair onto the floor. A few moments later he started mumbling in his sleep.
Sarah ogled the sleeping lunatic with a combination of awe and fear –appropriate emotions both for dealing with Kenji.
“My turn,” she declared, hitting the floor.
Oji sighed, “Could you at least wait until we’ve left?”
Sarah’s snoring was her reply.
George grinned and levered himself up, “I’ll help you get her home.”
Oji smiled, “Thanks.”
The two each grabbed an arm, hefted Sarah up, and headed for the door, drag-walking her along as they went. As the last man standing, I put the disc back into its proper case and collapsed onto my bed.
+++
That seems a fitting end for these shenanigans.
Watching
Them! is a Halloween tradition for me. I have an old VHS copy bought from a Blockbuster used bin, which should tell you how old it is. The tape’s getting a bit worn, so I rented the DVD from the library this year (it continues to amaze me the library’s superiority over Netflix.)
Anyway, Happy Halloween everyone! Please give the Misha story a look-see as well, for if there’s one dead horse I’ll never stop beating, it’s my secret desire to write lesbian romance.
Also, I already have an idea for what I want to do next year. It will be… something (time-space continuum shenanigans and codeine may be involved.)
See you around, folks, remember to check out my non-KS reading if you’re so inclined (points at ebook non-chalantly) and until next time…
/smokebomb