Lost in Translation - A Shizune Prequel

WORDS WORDS WORDS


Identity Crisis
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Joined: Sat May 09, 2015 9:06 am

Re: Lost in Translation - A Shizune Prequel

Post by Identity Crisis »

I just wanted to say that you have a really good, really entertaining handle on Shizune. Your characterisation, particularly in that first chapter but also in the second, really stands out. Your writing seems to flow naturally and makes for easy reading also. I have to admit I'm a bit envious of it.

Really looking forward to the next chapter.
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Gajzla
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Location: England

Re: Lost in Translation - A Shizune Prequel

Post by Gajzla »

I like Shizune’s dry monologue, almost like she was stuck in her own head and was thoroughly put out about it, but being her she refuses to give in and so you get this really interesting character. As I’ve said yours is one of, if not the only Shizune I like. (That i’ve read)

As for flow, well, I never found the other chapters dragging. But then i’m not especially picky if the characters are interesting. Then again if your having these problems at chapter three that could be a bad sign for motivation for the rest of the story.

Here’s hoping you work something out, also does your lab have a sonicator? sonicator’s are awesome.
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Oddball
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Re: Lost in Translation - A Shizune Prequel

Post by Oddball »

It's a shame this never got continued. It started off really strong with lots of interesting material to work with.
Not Dead Yet
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Mirage_GSM
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Re: Lost in Translation - A Shizune Prequel

Post by Mirage_GSM »

Mirage_GSM wrote:..., and since it's from you ... there's a good chance it will be finished, since you've delivered before, ...
Yeah, sometimes my words come back to bite me...
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.
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Blank Mage
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Re: Lost in Translation - A Shizune Prequel

Post by Blank Mage »

Oddball wrote:It's a shame this never got continued. It started off really strong with lots of interesting material to work with.
It is, isn't it? My life was kind of devoured by one-shots, and then actual projects. As it turns out, the boards here saved my chapter 3 draft...

...ah hell, gimme a sec. This might be back on.
And we're back.
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"I wish I could convey to you just how socially inept I am, but I can't."
"I think you just did."
"No, I really, truly haven't."
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