Last August, I played Emi's route, and my natural inclinations led me to her bad ending. Well, just that much pained me deeply. A bit of introspection showed that you have to be outright hypocritical to get that ending; to pry into Emi's problems whilst brushing off Misha's attempt to do the same for you. And what did that make me? The implication was that I wanted my skin to be something of a one-sided mirror—through which no one can look in, but I can look out. I wanted normal relationships with other people, but wouldn't let anyone else have one with me (which defeats any relationships you'd have to begin with). That's another way of phrasing the hedgehog's dilemma, isn't it? Although, that problem seems to be one common to all hedgehogs and humans playing at being hedgehogs; my problem seems to be nothing but a personal failing

That was a year ago. Yesterday, I finally got around to playing Hanako's route, completely blind to its flowchart but vaguely aware through some vague spoiler that there was some sort of parallel to Emi's route—which became evident in Act 2. In each route there's a tragic past hidden behind a compulsive need to keep it hidden. In each route there's the question of why the player needs to know more about that past, and how it should (and shouldn't!) affect the player's relationship with the girl hiding it.
But that was only in a nook in the back of my mind. Every other part of my mind was intent on sending me hurtling toward Hanako's bad ending, just as it had for Emi a year ago.
It's sodding plain as day in retrospect. Hanako is even wearing her street clothes—she very clearly isn't content to "call it a day." Goddamn it. Who the bloody hell gave me the right to decide that there was nothing better for Hanako than to send her off to her room to stew in her own depression?—and who gave me half a mind to think for a second that this was anything close to what Hanako wanted? I mean, she's wearing her fucking street clothes.
I don't get it. Really, this isn't even about KS, and is only symptomatic/emblematic of deeper problems, but I'm posting it here because no one but a KS player would understand much of anything in the last few paragraphs. I s'pose I want a fresh perspective
