Crippling phobias

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SpunkySix
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by SpunkySix »

Disposition wrote:I'm afraid that I will enter a mental state of silent hill. I've come close one time, was not a pleasant experience, I think it was all of my inner thought turned against me, and, while on a large quantity of drugs, my mind was taken to another dimension, where everything is fighting against me, but, in reality it was my own thoughts, and problems, and basically a giant self-allegory, that I wish I could remember so that maybe I could search deeper in my shadow. But, I don't want to go back to that state, apparently my heart was beating at 220 bpms and I was having a panic attack.
I was entirely unaware that something so intensely psychologically horrifying was possible. What did you do after you got out of it?
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Disposition
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Disposition »

SpunkySix wrote:
Disposition wrote:I'm afraid that I will enter a mental state of silent hill. I've come close one time, was not a pleasant experience, I think it was all of my inner thought turned against me, and, while on a large quantity of drugs, my mind was taken to another dimension, where everything is fighting against me, but, in reality it was my own thoughts, and problems, and basically a giant self-allegory, that I wish I could remember so that maybe I could search deeper in my shadow. But, I don't want to go back to that state, apparently my heart was beating at 220 bpms and I was having a panic attack.
I was entirely unaware that something so intensely psychologically horrifying was possible. What did you do after you got out of it?
I was freaked out for a few days, I could hardly leave my room/talk to people. There was a point in the dream where I was beaten for a good few hours and I couldn't stop it, I thought it was real, I thought I was dead, those 3 hour of being stuck in there felt like weeks. I've for the most part gotten over it now, but, sometimes I sense it nearing me.

I woke up, my chest was sore for around 5 days, I don't even know how to explain it. The most terrifying part, when I thought I was dead all I saw was different shades of purple put together to almost create a galaxy. Everything in it seemed so real, that the day after I wasn't entirely sure it wasn't.
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Xaredian
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Xaredian »

Broomhead wrote:
Xaredian wrote: No they're not. Fuck both. Fuck both till both die, please?
Would you be the Lilly to the bee's Hisao?
I don't follow...
Atario wrote:
Xaredian wrote:I'm mentally incapable of being depressed.
You realize you're tempting fate, right?
I tempt fate every passing day.

It is nothing to me.
Khalego wrote:
Xaredian wrote:I'm mentally incapable of being depressed.
Get help immediately.
Why?

I generally forget why I'm sad, or I simply get over it. On the flip side, though. I can't stay happy or mad for long, either. As though I was born without emotions, a Nobody so to speak. You also have the fact that I have Asperger's. I show little emotion, and generally don't see the point in them. So, like many memories, I may toss them aside.

If you believe I need help, that's what you believe. I just don't see the point in being depressed. It be general sadness or chronic, it's just an odd concept that I'll never understand.
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Disposition »

Xaredian wrote:
I generally forget why I'm sad, or I simply get over it. On the flip side, though. I can't stay happy or mad for long, either. As though I was born without emotions, a Nobody so to speak. You also have the fact that I have Asperger's. I show little emotion, and generally don't see the point in them. So, like many memories, I may toss them aside.

If you believe I need help, that's what you believe. I just don't see the point in being depressed. It be general sadness or chronic, it's just an odd concept that I'll never understand.
I have clinical depression, but, I've never been sad. I've been through the deaths of family members/animals, and none of them has affected me emotionally. Depression for me is more self-hate/apathy/life is meaningless, so why waste my time being here having to struggle. I've always had trouble showing emotions/explaining how I feel. I've tested borderline asperger's spectrum, but a lot of the diagnostics don't adhere to me.
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"We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion."

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the kings horses and all the kings men
Couldn't put Humpty together again."
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Atario
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Atario »

Xaredian wrote:I just don't see the point in being depressed.
Are you under the misapprehension that people choose to be depressed?
NB: none of the above is a request

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Disposition
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Disposition »

Atario wrote:Are you under the misapprehension that people choose to be depressed?
I think most people believe that. If don't experience depression yourself, then it has to be a choice for others to do so.

One of my acquaintances thought depression was a thing that only lasted for a certain length of time since both of her sisters got really depressed after break-ups, and the way she gauged that question towards me probably would have offended most others, I don't remember the exact context, it was somewhere along the lines of "why don't you just get over it? My sister's were able to." I just chuckled in response. There is nothing for me to "get over" my depression is for no apparent reason, it just is there.

Depression for me is hereditary, have a lot of depressed/bipolar in my family.
INTP Enneagram 5w4

"We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion."

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the kings horses and all the kings men
Couldn't put Humpty together again."
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Broomhead
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Broomhead »

I don't follow.
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Guest Poster »

Actually, Hisao's to blame too. He carried her to their bed, exhausting himself already, and since he was the one on top, he could have paced himself a little more, but he didn't, mostly because he was too horny. Lilly's fault was merely getting him to that particular stage.
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by SpunkySix »

Disposition wrote:
Atario wrote:Are you under the misapprehension that people choose to be depressed?
I think most people believe that.
HINT: Most people are wrong.
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by brythain »

SpunkySix wrote:
Disposition wrote:
Atario wrote:Are you under the misapprehension that people choose to be depressed?
I think most people believe that.
HINT: Most people are wrong.
Actually I think that there are indeed people who choose to be depressed. Alcohol is a wonderful CNS depressant that lots of people choose to imbibe.

At the same time, there are brain-based conditions that lead to depressive behaviour, and the sufferer has no choice but to be depressed unless drugs that handle the phenomena causing said conditions are available and effective.
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SpunkySix
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by SpunkySix »

brythain wrote:Actually I think that there are indeed people who choose to be depressed. Alcohol is a wonderful CNS depressant that lots of people choose to imbibe.

At the same time, there are brain-based conditions that lead to depressive behaviour, and the sufferer has no choice but to be depressed unless drugs that handle the phenomena causing said conditions are available and effective.
The thing is, the people who drink that much don't do it to be depressed, and if they do, it's because of some other condition. Nobody just goes, "Well, I think I feel like being depressed forever" without something being a little off.
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brythain
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by brythain »

SpunkySix wrote:
brythain wrote:Actually I think that there are indeed people who choose to be depressed. Alcohol is a wonderful CNS depressant that lots of people choose to imbibe.

At the same time, there are brain-based conditions that lead to depressive behaviour, and the sufferer has no choice but to be depressed unless drugs that handle the phenomena causing said conditions are available and effective.
The thing is, the people who drink that much don't do it to be depressed, and if they do, it's because of some other condition. Nobody just goes, "Well, I think I feel like being depressed forever" without something being a little off.
I was using 'depressed' in its two common senses: 1) a lowered level of CNS activity, e.g. after drinking a fair bit; 2) a chronic mental state characterised by a mood of low energy, reduced pleasure, reduced appetite, disinterest and so on. People who drink are effectively CNS depressed no matter why they do it; people who are clinically depressed remain so unless the underlying brain-based condition can be successfully treated.
Post-Yamaku, what happens? After The Dream is a mosaic that follows everyone to the (sometimes) bitter end.
Main Index (Complete)Shizune/Lilly/Emi/Hanako/Rin/Misha + Miki + Natsume
Secondary Arcs: Rika/Mutou/AkiraHideaki | Others (WIP): Straw—A Dream of SuzuSakura—The Kenji Saga.
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Khalego »

Xaredian wrote:Why?

I generally forget why I'm sad, or I simply get over it. On the flip side, though. I can't stay happy or mad for long, either. As though I was born without emotions, a Nobody so to speak. You also have the fact that I have Asperger's. I show little emotion, and generally don't see the point in them. So, like many memories, I may toss them aside.

If you believe I need help, that's what you believe. I just don't see the point in being depressed. It be general sadness or chronic, it's just an odd concept that I'll never understand.
Because being incapable of such a thing is indicative of a deep flaw. Tossing aside present emotions and memories like junk mail is entirely your choice if you're into being a robot, but being incapable is a whole different thing. And being a fan of Kingdom Hearts is just quarantine levels of sick. :P

@Disposition: Not being sad, ever, seems like a ridiculously large red flag...
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Xaredian »

Atario wrote:
Xaredian wrote:I just don't see the point in being depressed.
Are you under the misapprehension that people choose to be depressed?
Not necessarily. But I do think some people do.

Despite my understanding death is an eventually, I don't see life as pointless. I'm generally apathetic towards people I don't know on a personal level (Say, like Robin William. Sure, I understand his death is sad. But I don't feel anything about his death. But, if, say, my grandmother were to die, I'll probably feel quite sad). I'm mostly content.
You also have the fact I look at the glass half full. Though, I actually believe the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Disposition wrote:
Atario wrote:Are you under the misapprehension that people choose to be depressed?
I think most people believe that. If don't experience depression yourself, then it has to be a choice for others to do so.

One of my acquaintances thought depression was a thing that only lasted for a certain length of time since both of her sisters got really depressed after break-ups, and the way she gauged that question towards me probably would have offended most others, I don't remember the exact context, it was somewhere along the lines of "why don't you just get over it? My sister's were able to." I just chuckled in response. There is nothing for me to "get over" my depression is for no apparent reason, it just is there.

Depression for me is hereditary, have a lot of depressed/bipolar in my family.
Interesting...
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I don't follow.
Lilly Spoilers Hosao nearly dies due to Lilly being too ravenous in her 3rd H-scene.
Oh yeah... I forgot about that...
Rather interesting scene, to be honest.
Khalego wrote:
Xaredian wrote:Why?

I generally forget why I'm sad, or I simply get over it. On the flip side, though. I can't stay happy or mad for long, either. As though I was born without emotions, a Nobody so to speak. You also have the fact that I have Asperger's. I show little emotion, and generally don't see the point in them. So, like many memories, I may toss them aside.

If you believe I need help, that's what you believe. I just don't see the point in being depressed. It be general sadness or chronic, it's just an odd concept that I'll never understand.
Because being incapable of such a thing is indicative of a deep flaw. Tossing aside present emotions and memories like junk mail is entirely your choice if you're into being a robot, but being incapable is a whole different thing. And being a fan of Kingdom Hearts is just quarantine levels of sick. :P

@Disposition: Not being sad, ever, seems like a ridiculously large red flag...
Ack, fine. I can feel emotions (Such as love). I've been sad, just never depressed. I equate depression as very deep sadness, which I've never been deeply sad about anything.
As such, I used the wrong words of "incapable of", I should have used "never been". This would be my fault on that accord.
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Munchenhausen
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Re: Crippling phobias

Post by Munchenhausen »

I can see where Khalego's coming from, with emotions.
Like, if I'm at work and shit's hitting the fan, I just remind myself that getting angry does nothing but prolong my work. Just takes some willpower to ignore it all.

That being said, I don't have anything like depression or Aspergers, so I can't really speak for anyone with those.
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