Complete: Hisao X OC 25/2/14

[Comrade]

Chapter 1 – A chance meeting part one
I guess this wasn't such a bright idea after all.

I walk around the town street trying to find my way back to school. I guess I didn't really put my thought on how to get back when Shizune and I parted ways.

Dammit I'm so stupid. I'll be late to class on my first week here…

After taking a couple of turns I find myself completely lost and exhausted from all the walking, and I decide to stop my futile search for the way back and go into one of the small shops here and buy myself a soft drink.

As I'm leaving the convenience store, I look for a place where I can sit down and catch my breath.
After scanning the town for a brief moment, my eyes settle on a small park on the other side of the road with some benches in it.
I take a look at my watch, only to discover the lesson has already started.

"Shit!" I blurt out.
I guess there's no point in rushing back to school now…

I decide to spend the rest of the school day here; maybe if I'm lucky Shizune will come and rescue me, and if not I'll just have to wait for the emergency search party…

The park itself is nothing special. there are a couple of wooden benches scattered around it, and the tall trees provide a nice shade for those who pass the time here.
It reminds me a bit of the lush expanses in my school's grounds, only it seems somewhat less well tended. I guess having a very big budget allows better maintance for such things.
there's a small improvised soccer field a couple of meters away, and I can see a group of grade school children playing.

I spend some time sitting there with my eyes closed and listening to the gentle bird's song and the little children playing in the park, thinking about the situation I've gotten myself into.
I've been having trouble relating to people in Yamaku.
It seems like I can't stop thinking about their disabilities all whenever I'm trying to talk with them.

Sure people have been really friendly to me here, but I still can't put aside Shizune's constant sign language or Hanako's scars… whenever I talk to someone and I catch myself staring I just grind to a halt and feel like an asshole, which makes it really hard to try and have a conversation with someone.

I think back to the conversation I had with Yuuko, and I try to find a solution in her words.
I know I should look behind the superstitious and just accept people as they are, but for the time being, I don't think I can do it.




I am really tired.

All the commotion of moving into a new school and what I've been through this week is finally taking its toll on me.

The sweet warmth of the sun engulfs me in its embrace, and I succumb to the fatigue that has taken a hold of me.
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"Umm… hello?" a tentative voice wakes me from my slumber.

I wake up with a start.

"SorrymutouIwasntsleepingiswear!" Is all my groggy brain can come up with.

Looks like I fell asleep. Only I don't think I'm in school grounds… looks like the sun is already going down.

"Uh, are you okay?" that voice again; Right I'm not alone here.

I wipe my eyes with my hand as I take in the figure that stands in front of me.
A girl with brown waist length hair and young beautiful face returns my gaze with a mixture of confusion and worry on her face.

"Uhh hi…" I can feel blood rushing to my cheeks. Way to go Hisao, you managed to embarrass yourself once again!

"Hey…" she returns my greeting with a similar blush on her face, and then we stand there in an awkward silence for a few seconds.

"Umm I'm Hisao Nakai, nice to meet you. Looks like I sort of fell asleep on the bench" I try to offer a feeble laugh with my introduction to try and break off the awkwardness.

"Hello Hisao nice to meet you too; I'm Yuriko, Yuriko Maki." It is only now that I notice she wears the Yamaku school uniform and that she holds a small paper bag in her hand.

"Wait, so you're a Yamaku student too? Can you help me get back to the dorms? I'm new in school and I still don't have this area figured out." I ask, praying in my heart I won't have to call Misha to come pick me up.

Yuriko looks behind her shoulder and says with an apologetic look on her face

"I'm really sorry; I don't live at the dorms so I don't go back there."

"Oh that's okay…" I don't even make an attempt to hide my disappointment

"I'm really sorry!" I probably should learn how to keep my emotions to myself, looks like I made yet another person worry about me.

"No really it's okay, I'll just have to call my class representative to get me back…"


I quickly dial the number Misha gave me in case I'll need her. Didn't think I'll need it for something like this...

*************************************************************************************************************************************************


"Whahaha Hicchan~! You shouldn't have parted ways with us in the first place! You've missed half of the school day!" I keep my phone an arm length away from my ear to prevent any lasting damage to my eardrum from Misha's booming voice.

"Yeah yeah I know… thank you for coming to get me, and for not telling Mutou I was feeling ill.." I hang up the phone.

I notice Yuriko sat down where I previously had my little nap. She seems to be throwing something from her little bag on the ground… bird food?

I decide to try and strike a conversation with her to pass the time.

"Umm hey Maki… I see you're feeding the birds.." I say in what i hope is a natural voice while rubbing the back of my head. Is that really the best I can come up with?

Yuriko takes a long look at me, as if scanning me for something in particular.
Her gaze rest on my eyes and I can see her own pair of almond brown eyes.
She seems satisfied with what she saw and she gives me a small smile.

"Yes, I am. You can sit down here if you want" she signals to her right and I oblige without much hesitation.

"You can call me Yuriko if you prefer, though most people just call me Maki because it's shorter."

"Then you can call me Hisao."

We sit there for a short while; Yuriko is feeding the pigeons that gather around our bench and I just look at her. She seems really peaceful and practiced, as if she's done this plenty of times in the past.

"Do you want to try?" Yuriko breaks the silence, offering me some pieces of bird food from her bad.

"Umm, ok.." I take what looks like some sort of grain and throw it at the birds, who don't seem to appreciate my gesture and scatter away in a clutter of wings.

Yuriko lets out a short girly giggle, and I in turn let out a sigh.

"You're not supposed to hit them with it, you need to be more gentle." Yuriko explains with hints of contained laughter.

Yuriko throws some more food on the ground, which seems to get the birds' attention and they return to peck at the seeds we offer them.

"So in what class are you, Hisao?" Yuriko asks me, holding her hand out with some food in it.
A little bird lands on her arm and starts pecking at her outstretched palm.

"Doesn't that hurt?" I ask, having a bird bite you doesn't seem like fun to me.

"You get used to it." She answers in a nonchalant almost detached voice.

"I'm in class 3-3 in the science room. What about you?"

"I'm in class 3-4, its on the other side of your floor."

We sit there in silence for a couple of seconds. For some reason, being with this girl is very relaxing, especially in contrast to the stressful atmosphere Shizune and Misha impose.


"So Yuriko… "I try to come up with something to talk about." What brings you here?"

Yuriko points towards a row of simple suburban houses beyond the park's perimeter
"Well, I live right over there, so this is sort of the place I pass my free time. It’s a really good place to relax and it's easy to lose yourself here, as you've found out"
she delivers that last statement with a sly grin and I can feel my face getting hot again for being caught sleeping in public.

I let out a nervous chuckle "Yeah I see what you mean. I guess it really is easy to zone out here. I'm just really tired from the whole ordeal moving into a new school is, and in such a busy time too."

Yuriko hands me some more bird food and tells me to spread my palm. We sit in silence for a few seconds until a small bird lands on my arm and starts to nibble at my palm. The sensation is unpleasant, but bearable.

"You see? Its not that bad." Yuriko says with a smile."And what about you Hisao? What made you come and have a nap at the park?"

"Well I was down at the Shanghai with Shizune and Mish... i mean some classmates of mine, and we sort of split off. As I've said I'm new around here so I kinda got lost and thought it would be a good idea to have some rest at the park…"
I leave out the fact that the reason I wanted to rest is because my heart couldn't handle all the strain I put on it by walking around town. I'm still self conscious about my condition and even though Yuriko really seems like a nice person, I don't think we're close enough to talk about such personal issues.

Yuriko seems puzzled for a moment, but then realization hits her. "Shizune? You mean the student council president? I can't blame you for ditching her. I'm guessing she's trying to rope you into the council or something like that. She tried to do that to me when I joined Yamaku at the beginning of the year."
So she's sort of new here as well. It would be rude and ask what made her join Yamaku, so I don't press the issue.

I decide to try and steer the conversation elsewhere.

"So, I guess you like birds, huh?"

"Hmm yeah. Not just birds, I like animals in general. I have a cat back home, his name is Itai. He's really cute and all, but he's quite the little demon" She answers with a smile, while dropping some pieces of food on my still outstretched arm. I almost forgot the little bird was still there. "I also volunteer at the animal shelter twice a week. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am a big animal lover"

"There's an animal shelter in the town?" I ask, confused. While I have seen a stray cat here and there, this town seems way too small to have something like a fully functional animal shelter.

"It's not in town; it's in the city close by. The city is only half an hour away from here on a bus, and the shelter is about a ten minutes walk from the bus stop"

Ah the city. I've been in it once on the day I transferred to Yamaku. My parents decided it would be nice to stop at a café for a while because we took off early that day and we skipped breakfast.

"That makes sense, the city is really big from what I've seen, so I guess there would be a fair number of animals living in it."

We sit there in silence for a while.

Now when I think about it, as much as I hate myself for doing that , I can't really guess what's Yuriko's disability is. None of her limbs are missing, and I'm pretty sure she's neither blind nor deaf.
She probably has a problem on the inside like me, which makes me think she probably had similar thoughts in her mind when she first saw me.
I guess in some way that makes us lucky, not having to deal with people's stares and be labeled as cripples wherever we go, but I know all too well how some internal defects could be a lot worse than a missing leg or two.


My musing is interrupted by a loud voice calling my "name"

"Hicchan~!!!" I quickly turn my head to the source of the disturbance, which made the bird that until now was peacefully sitting on my arm to painfully claw at my hand and fly away in a blur while Yuriko lets out a startled gasp. Looks like Misha have found me.

She is accompanied by Shizune as usual, and they both run towards me from across the street.

"There you are Hicchan! Didn't we tell you to wait for us outside the park! WHAHAH~!" Yuriko seems very unhappy with the turn of events, and I tend to share her discomfort.
"Well, I didn't think you'll be here so soon! I thought you were at school!" looks like my hand starts to bleed a little from the cut the bird inflicted on me. I'll have to get the nurse to check I didn't catch bird flu or something…

"Don't be silly Hicchan! As soon as we saw you didn’t make it back to school, we realized something must have happened! Whahah! Shicchan was very worried about you, so we went to look for you in town as soon as we finished school! Whahaha~!"

something about that just doesn't make sense. I take a look at my watch.

"Misha, school ended two hours ago, couldn't you have called me when you actually got to town?" though I'm not complaining. I got to rest a bit, and I also got to meet another one of my fellow students.

I look to my left and see that Yuriko wears a very annoyed look on her face, probably for being completely ignored by the pair.

"Well, we figured nothing really could have gotten any worse, so we decided to stop at the Shanghai to have a little snack! And to do some more council work of course~! Whahaha~!"

It is only now that I notice the look on Shizune's face, and I almost get a heart attack from the fright. It is the face of exploding anger from the depths of hell . She would probably look kind of cute right now if it wasn't my fate on the line here.

Shizune explodes into a flurry of hand motions, and Misha translates.

"What you've done was really irresponsible Hicchan! You skipped school to play in the park even though you know how dangerous that could be! And worst of all you made us two really worried!"

If you were really that worried, you would've given me a call. She's probably going to try and blackmail me over this…

Shizune suddenly changes her expression to a sly grin. I don't like where this is going.

"Of course we should tell the teacher why you really didn't come to class~! That would be the responsible thing to do as your class rep! whahah~!"

Goddamit…

"Unless of course you'll come with us and help us finish some festival work! Whahahaha~!"

Well, fun time is over I guess.

I'm about to comply when I hear Yuriko's delicate voice piping up.

"I'm sorry Mikado, but Hisao here was just about to accompany me back to school." Yuriko delivers that line with an innocent smile.

seems like they only just now noticed we're not alone. I am taken aback by her lie, but I am also grateful for my chance to evade more council work.

Shizune glares daggers at Yuriko and I am amazed at how Yuriko managed to not even flinch from it. She begins to sign furiously at her and Misha dutifully translates.

"Miss Maki, I don't recall you ever moving to the dorms! I know for a fact you live in town, and there are no club meetings today, so there's absolutely no reason you should be going to school now! Whahaha~!"

Yuriko doesn't falter one bit and she counters Shizune's argument with an excuse of her own. "Yes I know that, but I kind of forgot my schoolbag back in class, and I need to get it."

"Even if that is true, which is doubtful, there's absolutely no reason you need Hisao to tag along with you. It is settled then, Hisao is ours~!"

Yuriko puts on an impressively convincing mock horrified expression, and answers with a matching incredulous tone.

"Are you suggesting that I walk around in the darkness all alone? Don’t you know horrible people can come and take advantage of a young defenseless girl like me?"

For a second I am completely amazed that she is actually trying that, but I sober up and play along.

"She's right, who knows what could be lurking around the corner here?" I try to sound as convincing as possible.

Yuriko nods in agreement. "And that's exactly why I need someone strong like Hisao to escort to and protect me from harm!" She slashes the air with her finger in a decisive motion, and I can feel myself getting red in the face.

Yuriko grabs me by the arm and starts to pull me away from the park. " Come on Hisao lets go! We don't have much time before they close the school!"

We begin to walk away from the scene, and without looking back I can hear a booming "Whahahaha~!" from behind.

Oh boy, am I lucky.

[Mirage_GSM]

As I'm leaving the convenient store,

It's called a convenience store.

I know I should look behind the superstitious...

Do you mean superficial?

You shouldn't have part ways with us in the first place!

parted

I hope this has better writing quality than zombies had...

I'm quite certain that it will

[AntonSlavik020]

Not bad overall. As I've said before, I'm not a big fan of OCs, I usually end up disliking them more often than not, but they can certainly work if done well. Not much to go on with her yet, but you have my interest.

[Comrade]

Well, I didn't really proofread it before posting, i was hasty
And Kane Anton Slavik, I guess we'll have to wait and see

[Sea]

Ok, overall, its great, I find the first half seemed kinda rushed, just add more detail and more though sequence and you'll be fine, there was no cats, boo, and no hanako, also boo. You did point out Hisao's inclanation to her multiple times, leaving no room for doubt, the rest of the others may have hinted at it (sometimes rather strongly) but you seem to have a singular goal for you character, which he isn't supposed to know about. A key thing to remember here (and i dont mean to patronize you) is that your story and your characters arent the smae thing, the path you lay out for them is influenced by the personalities and characters you insert into your story.

[Comrade]

Hmmm... I see what you mean, I might do some changes to it.

[LorSquirrel]

Interesting start. Although the beginning kind of bugged me with the lack of descriptions of Hisaos surroundings, but other than that Mirage already pointed out the typos I saw, so, uh, keep it up.

[SpunkySix]

It's interesting seeing Hisao paired with an OC. It's one thing to have an OC paired with one of the girls because those tend to be fairly Stu, but this looks to have more potential.

[Comrade]

Ok, I did some changes and fixed the errors I could find, is it better now?

[Numb]

Noticed one small error, you've been calling Mutou 'Moutu'.

Other than that, I can't see any glaring problems; Mirage will probably squash those. Looking forward to more of this, I'm actually a fan of OCs, when used correctly, in a fan fiction environment.

[Comrade]

Instead of being an idiot and posting the second part of the secene on a different post, I merged them on the OP.
feel free to do thr usual error finding and such.

[Mirage_GSM]

I have a cat back home, his name is Itai.

Interesting choice of name... You do realize it means "ouch" or "to hurt", don't you?

"What you've done was really irresponsible Hicchan! You skipped school to play in the park even though you know how dangerous that could be! And worst of all you made us two really worried!"

Well abandoning the new student in town wasn't the epitome of responsibility either...

"Of course we should tell the teacher why you really didn't come to class~!

Maybe he should tell the teacher why he really didn't come to class.
This is almost too good a piece of blackmail to ignore

[bhtooefr]

I have a cat back home, his name is Itai.

Interesting choice of name... You do realize it means "ouch" or "to hurt", don't you?

I once named a cat Scratchy because he scratched me when he was a kitten. (And one of his sisters subsequently got named Itchy, even though that's a name for a mouse...)

[Comrade]

I have a cat back home, his name is Itai.

Interesting choice of name... You do realize it means "ouch" or "to hurt", don't you?

I once named a cat Scratchy because he scratched me when he was a kitten. (And one of his sisters subsequently got named Itchy, even though that's a name for a mouse...)

Sounds good. We'll go with that.

[Sea]

Hmmm, I like part 2 alot, you write really well when you're confident about it. I look forward to see how this will develop, what with stalker Misha and Shizune following Hisao's every move. It seems like you've cut out 1/2 through her route so that the feelings remain and that Shizune is going to be trying to stop Hisao and Maki from being together, which would be awesome, though I'm not sure it's your intent. Regardless, keep on writing!