Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
Don't worry about delays. I agree with the others, quality > quantity any day.
Miki is pretty cool.
I'm writing a thing and would love feedback.
I'm writing a thing and would love feedback.
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
I am so hyped for this ! 
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
There are no brakes on the hype train you know, so be careful.MegaMoto wrote:I am so hyped for this !
Come join the Yamaku Book Club! Where stuff happens and we discuss cripple porn
I come from the outside, do you know it?
I come from the outside, do you know it?
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
Hello, as a fan of fanfics and a fan of life, I would like to know if something has delayed you immensley or if you jave forgotten about this.ni understand you may have very important things to do, but would appreciate an update on your writting.
But please, do what needs to be done first, I love a good fic, not a rushed one.
But please, do what needs to be done first, I love a good fic, not a rushed one.
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SuperfluousU
- Posts: 17
- Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2013 7:39 am
- Location: An American in Canadia
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
I promise I haven't forgotten or abandoned this. I'm trying a few different writing techniques, and it's taking quite a bit longer than anticipated. I'll post another update soon.
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
Good to hear that you're continuing it, and to know that people still defy the Miki curse. Eagerly awaiting your next update, whenever you're able to release it.
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
Just read all this and really enjoyed it so far. Shizune and Misha felt perfectly in character to me (is there an abbreviation for that on these forums? IC?) and I quite liked how both of them, as well as Hisao, were really reasonable in their discussions. Meaning none said or did something unnecessarily stupid just so you could switch to some easy Miki intro-scene. Instead a rather likely issue arose with the ice-cream delivery missing. I appreciate the hectic signing action between Shizune and Misha in regards to whether Hisao should stay or not, which again means they realized that dragging Hisao into all their student council work would be unreasonable. Or well, dunno who of the two wanted Hisao to enjoy the festival instead, could be Shizune because she didn't want to annoy him considering her taking interest in him, but may also be Misha who wouldn't want Hisao to endure the rather strict work ethnic of Shizune at such a day.
Dunno, it was just a minor part but really added a bit more depth to their character, considering that arguments between Shizune and Misha aren't seen that often. Gives the impression that Misha isn't just a mindless drone.
Otherwise I'm impressed at the whole Kenji / Miki agent stuff. I don't remember if any of that was in KS or if I've read about Miki being an agent in another FanFic, either way it felt completely authentic for some reason. You also worked Kenji's roof top drinking scene into your fanfic and change it to advance your plot instead.
It's also nice to see that, for now, Hisao isn't just out of the sudden falling in love with Miki. Their banter is fun to read and Hisao's inner monologue so far... well reasonable again.
That's kinda important to me because I've read too many fanfics where Hisao or whatever character it is about has a way too sudden interest in the person the fanfic is about. For example the huge Akira pseudo route, where Hisao is immediately intrigued about Akira (which is of course fine) but then already can't stop mentioning her in his inner Monologue. Or there was some pseudo OC route with the MC seemingly randomly taking huge interest in Suzu immediately.
Nah, make it believable, like this. If characters do bond very quickly then that better be explained within their characterization or bigger events occurred to justify it. In this case for example it'll be completely expected if Miki will be more around Hisao after pushing him into a second heart attack. I mean disregarding how this plot will actually continue it would make sense that there's a lot to be said between the two now, be it mostly regret on Miki's side after the incident (at first anyways).
The flashback stuff itself seemed fine and kinda interesting as you changed it up a bit but quite honestly didn't feel necessary to me. I don't feel like Hisao encountering Miki in the first week is an issue because it didn't happen in KS. Then again it also can't hurt. As someone else mentioned it seems like Hisao cares more about his parents in your fanfic, which didn't really matter too much yet it seems but could be of interest later on. Either way that's not a change that bothers me. I actually like it because, for as level headed as Hisao always (well almost) is during KS, him not being as thankful to his parents seemed rather weird.
The upcoming scenarios after the heart attack could be potentially rather interesting as nothing quite that severe happened in KS, especially not when the cause for his attack was someone that isn't really that close to him yet. So I'm curious!
TL:DR - I hope you have resilience to the curse ;P
edit: Thanks for the info BlackWaltz, I corrected it.
Dunno, it was just a minor part but really added a bit more depth to their character, considering that arguments between Shizune and Misha aren't seen that often. Gives the impression that Misha isn't just a mindless drone.
Otherwise I'm impressed at the whole Kenji / Miki agent stuff. I don't remember if any of that was in KS or if I've read about Miki being an agent in another FanFic, either way it felt completely authentic for some reason. You also worked Kenji's roof top drinking scene into your fanfic and change it to advance your plot instead.
It's also nice to see that, for now, Hisao isn't just out of the sudden falling in love with Miki. Their banter is fun to read and Hisao's inner monologue so far... well reasonable again.
That's kinda important to me because I've read too many fanfics where Hisao or whatever character it is about has a way too sudden interest in the person the fanfic is about. For example the huge Akira pseudo route, where Hisao is immediately intrigued about Akira (which is of course fine) but then already can't stop mentioning her in his inner Monologue. Or there was some pseudo OC route with the MC seemingly randomly taking huge interest in Suzu immediately.
Nah, make it believable, like this. If characters do bond very quickly then that better be explained within their characterization or bigger events occurred to justify it. In this case for example it'll be completely expected if Miki will be more around Hisao after pushing him into a second heart attack. I mean disregarding how this plot will actually continue it would make sense that there's a lot to be said between the two now, be it mostly regret on Miki's side after the incident (at first anyways).
The flashback stuff itself seemed fine and kinda interesting as you changed it up a bit but quite honestly didn't feel necessary to me. I don't feel like Hisao encountering Miki in the first week is an issue because it didn't happen in KS. Then again it also can't hurt. As someone else mentioned it seems like Hisao cares more about his parents in your fanfic, which didn't really matter too much yet it seems but could be of interest later on. Either way that's not a change that bothers me. I actually like it because, for as level headed as Hisao always (well almost) is during KS, him not being as thankful to his parents seemed rather weird.
The upcoming scenarios after the heart attack could be potentially rather interesting as nothing quite that severe happened in KS, especially not when the cause for his attack was someone that isn't really that close to him yet. So I'm curious!
TL:DR - I hope you have resilience to the curse ;P
edit: Thanks for the info BlackWaltz, I corrected it.
Last edited by Blasphemy on Wed Sep 04, 2013 12:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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BlackWaltzTheThird
- Posts: 595
- Joined: Sun Jan 22, 2012 2:38 am
- Location: Melbourne, Australia
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
Protip: KSG means Katawa Shoujo General, which is the collective title for the Kataw aShoujo threads on /vg/. Shorthand for Katawa Shoujo is just KS.
BlackWaltz's One-stop Oneshot Shop - my fanfiction portal topic. Contains links to all my previous works, plus starting now any new ones I may produce (or reproduce)! Please, check it out!
BlackWaltz's Pastebin - for those who prefer to read things with no formatting and stuff. It's mostly the same as in my thread. Also contains assorted other writing!
BlackWaltz's Pastebin - for those who prefer to read things with no formatting and stuff. It's mostly the same as in my thread. Also contains assorted other writing!
Re: Miki Psuedo Route [Updated 6/21/13]
Thanks man. Just rememberSuperfluousU wrote:I promise I haven't forgotten or abandoned this. I'm trying a few different writing techniques, and it's taking quite a bit longer than anticipated. I'll post another update soon.
DON'T STOP...BELIEVING. Hold on to that feeeeeeeling
But really, appreciate your work sso far, and if I had the time, I'd totally proofread or something. But for now, I shall provide moral support