Former Sisterhood thread
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
By the end of the story I think Hanako was well on her way to recovery. Even if she weren't, I'd be surprised if the doctor just cuts students off once they graduate. She probably has colleagues that she can recommend Hanako's case to.
And if she really needs help, I can certainly see Lilly giving Akira a call and the two of them coming up with enough to cover the cost of therapy.
And if she really needs help, I can certainly see Lilly giving Akira a call and the two of them coming up with enough to cover the cost of therapy.
"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don't always soften the bad things. But vice versa, the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant." ~ The Doctor.
- Markus Ramikin
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Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Excellent story. In-character, well written, interesting to read, and quite satisfying as a happy (but not emptily-so) continuation of the good end. I particularly liked how the sex scenes were sweet but also a real part of the story, in spirit of the original game.
The only thing that I think would improve it is if it had actual narration instead of things like *giggle* and (glare). And that thoughts-in-parentheses formatting was a poor choice.
Among the little things, the reference to the manly picnic made me laugh.
Lilly receiving the "Hanako Bad End" shouting is something I have to commend. Re-using established elements or scenes is not always a good idea, but in this case it felt very appropriate.
Gotta say though, I'd have liked the story more with the therapist less prominent. I wonder what my friend who is a therapist would think of her. Anyway, I'd prefer if Hisao's actions originated less with her advice, and more with his own insights/motivations, and I didn't like how she predicted the good outcome before it happened - it made it feel a bit anticlimactic and "therapist-guided", unlike the Good End in the game. If I were introducing such a character, I'd make her purely professional, limited to taking on the psychological traumas but reticent about her patient's relationships. Maybe it's just me, though.
“Shizune was bored and she convinced them to take you there? I see.” - yeah, totally realistic, repeating a phone conversation for the reader's benefit .
Such a tease with that kiss thing at the end, hehe. What can I say. It's hard to explain to the shipper in me that that would have made no real sense.
Actually, I liked the way the possibility of Lilly liking Hisao was brought up and used earlier. It's the kind of confusion that made sense for Hanako and Hisao to have at that point, when Lilly was being quiet about her parents' summons and her friends didn't know what was going on with her.
BTW, did this part ever get followed up on?
(I wish I could put my finger on why, but that last line annoyed me. It just kinda felt... presumptuous and out of place. I'm not sure I can put into words why, though, but maybe anyone else felt the same way?)
Anyway. Overall, a very good read.
The only thing that I think would improve it is if it had actual narration instead of things like *giggle* and (glare). And that thoughts-in-parentheses formatting was a poor choice.
Among the little things, the reference to the manly picnic made me laugh.
Lilly receiving the "Hanako Bad End" shouting is something I have to commend. Re-using established elements or scenes is not always a good idea, but in this case it felt very appropriate.
Gotta say though, I'd have liked the story more with the therapist less prominent. I wonder what my friend who is a therapist would think of her. Anyway, I'd prefer if Hisao's actions originated less with her advice, and more with his own insights/motivations, and I didn't like how she predicted the good outcome before it happened - it made it feel a bit anticlimactic and "therapist-guided", unlike the Good End in the game. If I were introducing such a character, I'd make her purely professional, limited to taking on the psychological traumas but reticent about her patient's relationships. Maybe it's just me, though.
“Shizune was bored and she convinced them to take you there? I see.” - yeah, totally realistic, repeating a phone conversation for the reader's benefit .
Such a tease with that kiss thing at the end, hehe. What can I say. It's hard to explain to the shipper in me that that would have made no real sense.
Actually, I liked the way the possibility of Lilly liking Hisao was brought up and used earlier. It's the kind of confusion that made sense for Hanako and Hisao to have at that point, when Lilly was being quiet about her parents' summons and her friends didn't know what was going on with her.
BTW, did this part ever get followed up on?
Did I miss something, do we ever find out what the gift was?If you manage to reconcile with Miss Ikezawa, I may have a small gift for her that I’d like to present to you…nothing serious, just something I just thought of.”
“You’re making me curious.”
“All the more reason to try and sort things out as soon as you can, isn’t it?”
(I wish I could put my finger on why, but that last line annoyed me. It just kinda felt... presumptuous and out of place. I'm not sure I can put into words why, though, but maybe anyone else felt the same way?)
Anyway. Overall, a very good read.
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Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Thanks for the feedback.
It could be argued he was repeating it for Hanako's benefit, who was with him but able to hear only one side of the conversation.“Shizune was bored and she convinced them to take you there? I see.” - yeah, totally realistic, repeating a phone conversation for the reader's benefit
It's possible your friend might feel that Yumi's move to give Lilly a ride to the hospital and give Hisao a pep-talk was out of line given her job, since in general psychiatric workers aren't really supposed to take any actions concerning their clients without consulting those clients first. The peptalk was kind of a spontanous action on her behalf as she originally merely intended to get Lilly to the hospital and say hello to Hisao. That said, therapists are humans too and she probably figured that helping to defuse the situation early might possibly save her a headache or two during later sessions.Gotta say though, I'd have liked the story more with the therapist less prominent. I wonder what my friend who is a therapist would think of her. Anyway, I'd prefer if Hisao's actions originated less with her advice, and more with his own insights/motivations, and I didn't like how she predicted the good outcome before it happened - it made it feel a bit anticlimactic and "therapist-guided", unlike the Good End in the game. If I were introducing such a character, I'd make her purely professional, limited to taking on the psychological traumas but reticent about her patient's relationships. Maybe it's just me, though.
The "gift" was the upcoming first aid training that was mentioned in the last part.If you manage to reconcile with Miss Ikezawa, I may have a small gift for her that I’d like to present to you…nothing serious, just something I just thought of.”
“You’re making me curious.”
“All the more reason to try and sort things out as soon as you can, isn’t it?”
Sisterhood: True Edition. Hanako epilogue I wrote. Now expanded with additional chapters.
- Markus Ramikin
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- Joined: Sun May 12, 2013 2:14 am
- Location: Holy Terra
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Oh, I missed it somehow. Thanks.
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Did I just read Acts 5-7?
That was amazing. I also find it very funny how some references to other routes were randomly made.
(" No glasses, no napkins, just a bottle of…" - Keeeennnnjiiiiii!!!)
("that place is a one-way street and will remain so for as long as I live." - Let's practice the alphabet with Emi. Can you think of a word that starts with A?)
("H-Hanako, by ‘comfort’, do you mean COMFORT?" - Yeah...... heh......)
There were a few others, but I can't remember them all. Anyway, great job on this.
That was amazing. I also find it very funny how some references to other routes were randomly made.
(" No glasses, no napkins, just a bottle of…" - Keeeennnnjiiiiii!!!)
("that place is a one-way street and will remain so for as long as I live." - Let's practice the alphabet with Emi. Can you think of a word that starts with A?)
("H-Hanako, by ‘comfort’, do you mean COMFORT?" - Yeah...... heh......)
There were a few others, but I can't remember them all. Anyway, great job on this.
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Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Thanks. Oh and:
This one was also inspired by a quote from Cpl_Crud who, in reply to some fans speculating on Hanako's likes in that area, once replied that "there will never be anything other than poo in Hanako's bum". No shed-event for her, in other words.("that place is a one-way street and will remain so for as long as I live." -
Sisterhood: True Edition. Hanako epilogue I wrote. Now expanded with additional chapters.
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
I didn't know Crud said that. I did know about the speculation though. it seems that for a while "Hanako likes anal sex" was a running gag in the fandom. There are even a few pictures on the shimmie that talk about it. I just figured that's what you were referring to.Guest Poster wrote:Thanks. Oh and:
This one was also inspired by a quote from Cpl_Crud who, in reply to some fans speculating on Hanako's likes in that area, once replied that "there will never be anything other than poo in Hanako's bum". No shed-event for her, in other words.("that place is a one-way street and will remain so for as long as I live." -
Not Dead Yet
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
I guess this is what the devs do in their free time... answer the weirdest questions fans have to offer.Oddball wrote: I didn't know Crud said that. I did know about the speculation though. it seems that for a while "Hanako likes anal sex" was a running gag in the fandom. There are even a few pictures on the shimmie that talk about it. I just figured that's what you were referring to.
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Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Nah. We all know Hanako's kink will be the worst of all. Consensual sex in the missionary posiston. That little Perv!Oddball wrote:I didn't know Crud said that. I did know about the speculation though. it seems that for a while "Hanako likes anal sex" was a running gag in the fandom. There are even a few pictures on the shimmie that talk about it. I just figured that's what you were referring to.Guest Poster wrote:Thanks. Oh and:
This one was also inspired by a quote from Cpl_Crud who, in reply to some fans speculating on Hanako's likes in that area, once replied that "there will never be anything other than poo in Hanako's bum". No shed-event for her, in other words.("that place is a one-way street and will remain so for as long as I live." -
"Misha, I don't think Chocoholism is a real disability."
"But the School's Entrance Board does Hi-Chan. Wahaha~"
"But the School's Entrance Board does Hi-Chan. Wahaha~"
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Negativedarke wrote:
Nah. We all know Hanako's kink will be the worst of all. Consensual sex in the missionary posiston. That little Perv!
With the lights off. After lots of hugging and kissing. Trollop.
"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don't always soften the bad things. But vice versa, the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant." ~ The Doctor.
- forgetmenot
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Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
I bet she'd even have the gall to cuddle afterwards. Quite the brazen one, Hanako is.pandaphil wrote:Negativedarke wrote:
Nah. We all know Hanako's kink will be the worst of all. Consensual sex in the missionary posiston. That little Perv!
With the lights off. After lots of hugging and kissing. Trollop.
I write the Kagami pseudo-route, which can be found here. It's about Hisao falling in love with a violinist.
Also, a small Saki/Rika piece I wrote.
Check out the Yamaku Library Anniversary thread! I contributed one story, but it's chock-full of 'em.
Also apparently I have an art thread now? I'm not an artist.
I also do edits! Need something proofread? Shoot me a PM and we'll talk.
Also, a small Saki/Rika piece I wrote.
Check out the Yamaku Library Anniversary thread! I contributed one story, but it's chock-full of 'em.
Also apparently I have an art thread now? I'm not an artist.
I also do edits! Need something proofread? Shoot me a PM and we'll talk.
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Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Okay, I misquoted him on exact text, but not on message.
More specifically, sober Hanako's kink.Nah. We all know Hanako's kink will be the worst of all. Consensual sex in the missionary posiston. That little Perv!
Sisterhood: True Edition. Hanako epilogue I wrote. Now expanded with additional chapters.
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Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
pandaphil wrote:Negativedarke wrote:
Nah. We all know Hanako's kink will be the worst of all. Consensual sex in the missionary posiston. That little Perv!
With the lights off. After lots of hugging and kissing. Trollop.
Lights on, and her on top for Hisao's birthday. Maybe even a bath together.
"Misha, I don't think Chocoholism is a real disability."
"But the School's Entrance Board does Hi-Chan. Wahaha~"
"But the School's Entrance Board does Hi-Chan. Wahaha~"
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
So basically replaying Lilly's bath scene, and brushing her hair for her afterwards. Adorable.Negativedarke wrote:pandaphil wrote:Negativedarke wrote:
Nah. We all know Hanako's kink will be the worst of all. Consensual sex in the missionary posiston. That little Perv!
With the lights off. After lots of hugging and kissing. Trollop.
Lights on, and her on top for Hisao's birthday. Maybe even a bath together.
"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don't always soften the bad things. But vice versa, the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant." ~ The Doctor.
Re: Sisterhood (Hanako Epilogue) (Completed)
Read this after a recommendation I got upon finishing a different fan work and I'm happy to say I was not disappointed. This was so well written that I never at any point doubted the characters or situations being unreal or out of place. I actually cried after Lilly's phone call to her mother in the last chapter. Kudos.