For Want of a Nail - Misha Route (Updated 11/1/19)

[Mut-Who]

Well, well, well. I have to say, very exceptional work is being done here. I like the way the fic has itself set up here, with Act 2 setting up for the relationship, Act 3 seeing it slowly build but also have slight undertones of future conflict. I think considering the canon Misha I think we all at least somewhat expect what the conflict will largely center around in Late 3 and Act 4, but this fic has been primarily good at both meeting and then exceeding expectations for events, even when it does try (and succeed) at following the three act structure of the other routes, so good work Prof.

As a side note, the humor here in the fic has also been both charming and hilarious. Something important I think to help cushion the blow once things start speeding on the Cerebus Syndrome tracks towards heart-crushing sadness. The fact that it'll be Misha being the terribly sad one here is probably going to make it all the worse.

So yeah, can't wait to see what comes in the future.

[Vekter]

Damn it, I'm already caught up. D:

Hell of a story, Prof. Told you most of my feedback on Steam. Keep it coming, brother.

[Gruntbuggly]

Yikes, we're at almost a month and a week since the last addition. These wait times keep getting longer and longer. You still hanging in there, Prof?

[ProfAllister]

I understand that a lot of people are invested in me finishing this and want me to write faster. I'm one of them.

But I don't want to have to keep repeating myself in between every chapter like this.

I have every intention to finish this. I am not in the slightest bit discouraged or reconsidering or otherwise wavering. If I do start to lose confidence/interest, I will respect you enough to let you know.

I miss writing and posting a chapter every week as much as you all miss reading them. But there's a series of circumstances which has made this generally unfeasible. In short: spouse and I are expecting our first baby in little more than a week; I'm holding down a full-time job; all the extra activity leaves me relatively exhausted when I finally get some free time, making it harder to sit down and write when I need to decompress from the day's stresses; and the Act 3 Scenes have all been longer than all but one of the Act 2 scenes.

So I'm not stressing out. I'm not floundering. I'm not getting discouraged. I'm not at a loss for inspiration. My time has simply become much more dear in the past few months, so I can't afford to put the same amount of time into my writing as I had for Act 2.

Some of it is my fault, admitted. Like most human beings, I tend to procrastinate. So I could be writing faster, if I really had the discipline for it. And for every minute lost due to a lack of discipline, I apologize.

The ultimate takeaway, however, is that I am sticking to the project until it's done. Even if I stop caring about Misha, about KS, and everything else, I consider it my self-imposed duty to (eventually) finish this. I started this project for the specific purpose of seeing a long-term project through to the end.

As far as a status update goes, I'm 6000 words deep into Scene 3. I only have a couple more vignettes left to include in this chapter, but I can't say (at the moment) how long they'll turn out to be. Once I finish this draft, I'll run it by my various editors, then get it out for your reading pleasure shortly after they're done tearing it to shreds.

Assuming the baby isn't early, you'll have a new chapter before I have a new child.

[AntonSlavik020]

That's OK, I figured something to do with real life came up. And congrats on the baby.

[Bagheera]

Fans are pushy, it's the nature of the beast. But pay us no mind; share your story when you're ready and not a moment before. We'll be here.

[ProfAllister]

Looking back at my post, I guess it comes off as annoyed or frustrated about answering the same question over and over. That wasn't the intention.

I'm not new to the internet. I'm very familiar with the project that starts strong, then gradually slows down and fades into nothingness. In fact, that sort of thing has (sadly) become my general expectation. I also know that I have a tendency to be a quitter. I have a countless number of half-finished projects, savegames, etc. Writing this was never about Misha, the fans, the joy of writing, or any of that. Those are all perks, of course. The reason I've been writing is so when that dark cynical voice comes and asks me what I've ever followed through on, I can reply with confidence "I finished writing a full-length cripple porn fanfiction!"

I love receiving the praise, the well-wishing, the constructive criticism (kind of wish I got more of that), and all the rest, so keep it up (provided it's well within the limitations of the forum rules). It's always nice to know that people care.

I just want to reassure you that I'm more than aware of the diminished pace and all the other warning signs. I know what that often implies. So I decided that I should lay all my cards out on the table so you could understand what the reduced pace does and does not mean (and to warn you that, unfortunately, things may slow down a little more once the baby's here).

I'm still here, and I'm still writing. I plan on continuing until this is done. It just might be slower than any of us would like.

[Markus Ramikin]

Well this is nice. Normally Misha triggers my "kill it with fire" response, but your fic is making me kinda like her. A rather enjoyable read.

"You shouldn't be doing naughty things on an empty stomach" made me smile. So did a bunch of other things. Makes me wish I didn't find writing humour nearly impossible.

I hope I'm not being unusually dense, but...

[My name is not Shizune.] - What? I am confused.

[One more thing. You lied to me. - I'm confused again. What did he lie about? That talking to Hanako was "student council business?" Surely it was obvious to both of them that he was just blowing her off (and rightly so). To make a "lie" out of it makes no sense to me, when Shizune and Misha use "student council business" as a general excuse for anything, themselves. Or did I miss something else that he lied about?

[Silentcook]

The reason I've been writing is so when that dark cynical voice comes and asks me what I've ever followed through on, I can reply with confidence "I finished writing a full-length cripple porn fanfiction!"

Well, fuck. Here comes the competition. I knew it was too good to last.

[Helbereth]

The reason I've been writing is so when that dark cynical voice comes and asks me what I've ever followed through on, I can reply with confidence "I finished writing a full-length cripple porn fanfiction!"

Well, fuck. Here comes the competition. I knew it was too good to last.

I sort of only peeked in here because I see SC actually post on a thread, but I have to agree.

*tosses the gauntlet*

I have my own cripple-porn fanfiction to finish, so have at thee!

[demonix]

The reason I've been writing is so when that dark cynical voice comes and asks me what I've ever followed through on, I can reply with confidence "I finished writing a full-length cripple porn fanfiction!"

Well, fuck. Here comes the competition. I knew it was too good to last.

I sort of only peeked in here because I see SC actually post on a thread, but I have to agree.

*tosses the gauntlet*

I have my own cripple-porn fanfiction to finish, so have at thee!

And I have six (that are active) that I have to finish off (two have only just gotten off the ground and one is now in the early phases).

Now, do I throw in just one gauntlet, or one for each of the active fanfictions I have.

[ProfAllister]

Huh? What's all this about competition? I'm only competing with myself. I could care less what you losers are up to. :p

I hope I'm not being unusually dense, but...

[My name is not Shizune.] - What? I am confused.

[One more thing. You lied to me. - I'm confused again. What did he lie about? That talking to Hanako was "student council business?" Surely it was obvious to both of them that he was just blowing her off (and rightly so). To make a "lie" out of it makes no sense to me, when Shizune and Misha use "student council business" as a general excuse for anything, themselves. Or did I miss something else that he lied about?

[My name is not Shizune.] -

This whole exchange requires some understanding of sign language, though I'd like to imagine that I provided the background required to follow that bit. Translating from sign language to spoken language isn't a 1-to-1 proposition. So everything in brackets is essentially run through a translation convention - the meaning is conveyed rather than the actual words (much like the fact that, technically speaking, the characters are all speaking Japanese).

On top of that, Sign language has an unusual relationship with names. There are "sign names" which can be a combination of actual signs or a "nonsense" sign - what matters is that the local community accepts the sign name as representing a specific individual. For individuals without sign names, their names are usually fingerspelled, although this isn't always the case. Complicating matters, Japanese names are, as I understand, a combination of Kanji, meaning actual words (Hanako, for example, is "Flower Child" - or "Nose Child," depending on the Kanji used).

For the purposes of the story, I kind of cheated. I took Misha's quirk of giving people nicknames (Hicchan, Shicchan, etc.) and expanded it into her signing as well. Hisao is "new kid" because he's a Mysterious Transfer Student. As a textual basis, I pulled from "Enter Stage Left"

Misha:
“Ah, and another thing, you don't have to call Shicchan something so formal like 'Hakamichi' or 'class rep' all the time! Just call her Shicchan~!”
Shizune:
“...”
Misha:
“Ahaha~! Okay, maybe that's too casual. Maybe 'Shizune' would be more appropriate?”
Shizune:
“...”
Misha:
“Yup, yup~! 'Shizune' is fine!”

The fact that Shizune corrected Misha indicates that there's some distinction between her signing of "Shizune" and "Shicchan." I decided that this would be Shizune's Sign Name and, for lack of a better term, the "Sign Nickname" given to her by Misha.

Fast forward back to the confusing quote and things will (hopefully) be clearer. Hisao has been learning sign language mainly from Misha. As such, he's picked up that Misha signs a certain sign when she says "Shicchan," which, logically, must mean "Shizune." So, go back to that scene. All the instances of signing "Shizune" are really "Shicchan," but Hisao (the narrator and viewpoint) doesn't know any better. Hence the disorientation.

[One more thing. You lied to me.] -

No, that was the lie. I would dispute your claim that Shizune and Misha use "student council business" as a general excuse for anything. Every time they use the term, it is directly related to matters that concern the Student Council. And Shizune doesn't care that it's a little white lie. A lie is a lie.

[Markus Ramikin]

I see. I think doing it that way is being unnecessarily clever for the story's own good, but maybe it's just me.

And Shizune doesn't care that it's a little white lie. A lie is a lie.

It doesn't come across as a white lie, just sarcasm. Another way of saying "none of your business, Shizune." So her bringing it up like it was some hurtful breach of trust... well, at least I see I'm not the only one in this thread whom it confused.

I was surprised, in fact, that Hisao himself wasn't confused what she's even talking about. It'd be funny if he asked for clarification, and for her to try to be taken seriously while explaining that she thought he meant it when he spoke of "student council business".

I would dispute your claim that Shizune and Misha use "student council business" as a general excuse for anything

Uh, I'd need to dig for it. I seem to remember them being fond of stretching the truth like that - he even calls them a corrupt government at some point, IIRC? What Hisao did there seemed perfectly in character for Shizune+Misha to do to Hisao, except they'd be trying to manipulate him about something or other, while he's just stopping Shizune in her attempt to control who he's allowed to talk to. But maybe I'm wrong. I only played Shizune's route once, and I skip through them in other routes, so I guess I won't pursue this point.

[Oddball]

I would dispute your claim that Shizune and Misha use "student council business" as a general excuse for anything.

They seem to be perfectly fine skipping class and going to the Shanghai under the excuse that it's Student Council business and using left over funds to buy themselves meals on different occasions.

And Shizune doesn't care that it's a little white lie. A lie is a lie.

Misha mentions that they usually just make up their reports, but since Hisao is helping out, they'll at least have relevant topics this time to talk about.

[Helbereth]

I see. I think doing it that way is being unnecessarily clever for the story's own good, but maybe it's just me.

I've encountered problems like this with my story as well, and I think it's just a matter of working with the perspective as it should be. As it's written in real-time, and through the character's eyes, you basically only know what that character knows.

Shizune is signing what he knows as her name, so that's how he perceives what she says; basically, Hisao literally does not know any better, so when she signs what he knows as her name, that's how he understands it... he's confused, so we're confused.

That doesn't happen with omniscient perspective because the narrator is either an over-the-shoulder entity, or one of the characters looking back, and they know everyone's thoughts. If this were a past-tense or 3rd person story, this kind of confusion wouldn't work, but since we're live inside Hisao's skull, it does.

Anyway!

I stayed up last night and read through everything that's here so far. I found a few errors in the second part, but I lost the tab where I had the notes written down. Otherwise, I've really liked this take on the Misha route. I think I read the original chapter a long time ago, and I was even the first one to ever comment, but didn't stay updated (I got busy, so sue me).

I believe I pointed this out originally, but I like how this is a 1-point deviation from the original story. All you did was add a decision point (continue muddling his way back to the school, or go back and ask Misha for help), and that sets him on a path toward romancing Misha instead of Shizune.

This seems like it's only just getting started, as well, as there's a LOT of stuff to still figure out with Misha. Since you have miles to go before you sleep, I offer my condolences, and my encouragement; you haven't even gotten to the hard part yet! Mwahahaha!