A big shout-out to SemisoftCheese for proofing and giving me editing advice. Much love. Go read the Saki pseudo-route continuation! /shamelessplug
Scene 12: Crescendo
I glance at my phone, checking the time- it's 4:00. The bus is late, and it's at least a twenty-minute ride into the city. I hope I'll have enough time to find the address Kagami gave me. I'm starting to regret not asking for a phone with more features when my parents offered to get one for me. I don't think this one does navigation. Or anything besides calls and text messaging. Hopefully there'll be a map stand or something at the bus stop. I want to kick myself for not looking for directions before I left Yamaku. I suppose it's too late now, though.
At 4:05, I finally hear the dull rumble of the bus's engine as it rolls over the hill and into the stop. I deposit the necessary coins into the box and make my way towards an empty seat near the front of the bus. Thankfully, I spot a small plastic box mounted on the wall opposite my seat filled with maps and pamphlets. I pull one of the maps from the box and open it. The city seems a lot larger than what I'd expect for the area, although it's not larger than where I grew up. I suppose I haven't seen much - er, any - of the surrounding area besides Yamaku, which probably contributes to the "smaller" feel I've been getting.
Fortunately, the address Kagami gave me looks like it's only a few blocks away from the second bus stop in the city. Looks like I won't have to hoof it very far, which is good considering Emi upped my morning runs to a mile and a half today. I'm still not sure if I'm going to attend the track meet tomorrow, even though she gave me those puppy dog eyes when I told her as much after she invited me today. I'll probably end up going, as much as it makes me feel like a pushover.
Seventeen minutes later, I'm thanking the driver and disembarking from the bus. The concrete and blacktop surfaces do little to rein in the stifling mid-June weather. I can already feel myself sweating as I check the map one last time for orientation and set out on my way.
Being in the city reminds me of... well, it reminds me of before I came to Yamaku. Before I found out about my arrhythmia. It's nostalgic in a way, even though it's also a place I've never been. Surprisingly, it doesn't bother me as much as I expected. Although, I suppose when meeting a beautiful girl for a dinner date it's difficult to be upset about it.
It takes about ten minutes for me to find my way to the building Kagami's orchestra rehearses in. It's a small building nestled between two taller ones, its black corrugated metal facade clashing with the faded concrete structures on either side. A brightly multicolored marquee on the front indicates that it's the community center for the arts I've been looking for. Kagami doesn't appear to be outside yet, so I cross the street and enter the building.
It's not much cooler inside, unfortunately, even though there's an awful racket coming from the vents overhead. I approach the water fountain to the side of the lobby for a drink. Thankfully, the water is ice-cold, and I'm able to get my thirst under control.
Hm, I wonder where the orchestra rehearses? I cross the lobby to a set of double doors and peer through one of the small rectangular windows. Before my eyes is a pretty large auditorium; there's got to be at least 800 seats in there. This building must be deeper than it is wide. On the stage is a full orchestra. At least a hundred people are up there. This sure seems like a bigger deal than Kagami makes it out to be. They don't seem to be playing right now; the conductor is waving his arms emphatically at the cello section.
Well, it's probably ok to go inside and sit down, just as long as I'm near the back.
I open the door quietly and make my way to one of the red plush seats in the last row. The acoustics in this room must be great: it's tough, but I can make out what the conductor is saying even from all the way back here.
"...all right, once more from letter E, and then we're done. And celli, please remember it's a b-natural at 107, not a b-flat," he says. I think I understood about a quarter of that. The members of the orchestra, however, appear like they've understood every word and raise their instruments to play. The conductor raises his baton, and brings it down forcefully.
I jump a little as I'm assaulted by a wave of brass and timpani. The music is... violent, I suppose. Very violent. But it's performed well. At least, I think it's performed well. It seems more... progressive than what I listened to in the hospital, though.
The loud shrieks of trumpets disappear as quickly as they came, and are replaced with violins repeating the same motif, although it seems higher than it was when the trumpets played it. As I watch the violins, I notice Kagami. She's sitting in the first chair to the conductor's left, bowing furiously. Her eyes dart back and forth from the music in front of her to the conductor's hands above her. Her playing is significantly more impassioned than the rest of the violin section- some of the musicians near the back of the violin section barely look like they're alive. In contrast, she's seated on the edge of her seat, moving in time with the music, her entire body given into some of the notes she's playing. She's far away, but I can see her grey eyes sparking with intensity from here.
Then, as suddenly as it started, it's over. The conductor circles with his baton, and the entire orchestra freezes for a half-second, before a collective breath is exhaled and they all sink back into their seats.
"Good work, everyone. Sorry we're a little late today. I'll see you next week," the conductor says, stepping from his podium and jumping down to the floor below the stage. The musicians begin to rise from their seats, shuffling around to their cases. Kagami remains on the stage for a few seconds, penciling something into her music before she grabs it from the stand and vaults off of the stage in one fluid, practiced motion.
Packing her instrument takes only a few seconds, and before I know it, she's quickly ascending the aisle. I stand up to meet her. She sees me standing and waves.
Kagami looks great in casual clothing. I imagine her dress is mostly because of the insufferable heat outside, but the pairing of a powder blue tank top with a small pair of black shorts is nothing short of flattering. I'm probably staring too much at her long, shapely legs, which are drawing ever closer. Stop it, Hisao. Eye contact.
Luckily, Kagami seems or pretends not to notice my staring. "Hey, Hisao," she calls out in greeting, before looking to me for affirmation that I am, in fact, the person she's supposed to be meeting.
I smile back. "Hey, Kagami."
"Whew," she half-exclaims as she finishes hiking up the carpeted walkway. "Almost didn't recognize you without your school clothes on. I'd say something about all the staring, but it comes in handy for recognition once in a while."
I can feel myself blush reflexively. Kagami laughs. "S-sorry," I stammer.
"Aww, don't get all bent out of shape about it. C'mon, let's get out of here."
I follow Kagami out into the lobby, where we each get one more drink from the water fountain before heading back out onto the street. She pulls her phone out of her pocket and pushes a small keyboard out from behind the screen. It's significantly more advanced than mine, a fact that's highlighted even more when Kagami holds down a small button on the bottom and says, "Ice cream," into the mouthpiece. She looks back up at me, as if to say, "If that's ok with you."
I nod. It's too early for dinner anyway, and ice cream might just be the best way to cool down short of an ice bath.
Kagami's phone beeps as the results of her search begin to populate the small screen. She squints at the first few entries. "Seems like there's a decent place about three or four blocks from here. Sound good?" she asks.
"Sounds good. Let's go," I reply.
As we walk, Kagami turns to face me. "So, how long were you waiting?"
"Oh, not too terribly long. I just heard the last run-through or so."
"Cool. Well, what'd you think?" she asks.
I draw my mouth to one side of my face. I didn't really have time to process what I heard in that auditorium. "Uh... it was loud... and pretty aggressive. You looked like you were enjoying yourself. You play with a lot of... intensity."
"Yeah, I probably look like an idiot. Mr. Ito - he's the conductor - says I'm too expressive sometimes," she explains.
"No, I didn't mean it like that," I reply, not sure how to recover. "You look... passionate. Like you really care about what you're playing. It's a good thing, I promise."
You look beautiful when you play. That's what I want to say to her. However, considering we agreed to be just friends for the time being, I suppose it's a little too forward.
Kagami shrugs. "If you say so. I doubt looking passionate alone will win me the concerto competition, though."
I tilt my head and ask, "Concerto competition? What's that?"
Kagami smiles. "Thanks for taking the bait and giving me an excuse to talk about it," she says, winking. "A few of the third-years in the orchestra had the chance to audition to play a solo piece with the orchestra for the last concert, which is in about two months. The competition was earlier this afternoon."
"Well? How did it go?" I ask, genuinely curious.
"Pretty well, I think. I'm already practicing something for college auditions in the fall, so I just played that," she answers, referring to the piece I've heard her play a few times.
She leans in closer to the side of my face and whispers for dramatic effect. "To be honest, I invited you to the city because I knew I'd either want to celebrate or forget about screwing up, both of which I can do with you." She winks mischievously.
I mock surprise. "I'm not sure I appreciate being manipulated like that."
She retorts by playfully bumping me in the leg with her violin case. "Oh, stop it. You know you like hanging out with me."
It's true, I do. Why wouldn't I want to hang out with a beautiful, funny girl on a Saturday evening?
We arrive at the ice cream parlor, where a significant line has formed. Apparently we weren't the only ones to think of beating the heat with frozen treats. As we stand in line, I continue our conversation from before.
"So, when do you think you'll find out about the competition?" I ask.
"Should have results next Saturday at rehearsal," Kagami replies. "I'm not gonna get my hopes up about it until then. They rarely pick violin players anyhow."
"How come?" I ask.
"We're too common. There's a lot of literature out there for violin, but less for a french horn or marimba player, for examples. Judges tend to favor the uncommon stuff. It's just how they work," she says dejectedly. Kagami really seems down on herself today. I wonder if her audition went as well as she made it seem? In the case of this being either the celebration or the post-failure forget-about-it party, the least I can do is buy her some ice cream.
She cheers up when I hand her a rather oversized cone full of rum raisin ice cream. Kagami begins to set her violin down to get into her purse, but I motion for her to stop. She pouts for a second, but eventually shrugs and makes her way over to the corner of the store closest to the door, while I pay for our purchases and make my way around the small mob gathered around the counter, careful not to drip any chocolate ice cream onto any unsuspecting patrons.
"Thanks for the ice cream, Hisao. You're a gentleman," Kagami says politely as we exit the shop.
I smile. "Least I can do for you. Especially on a day like today."
"I know~" Kagami attempts to say with a mouthful of ice cream. Apparently she just bites it instead of licking around the corners like I do. "Ish too hot outshide."
We locate a bench near a small garden, which smells of freshly cut grass. There must be a park around here somewhere. I look for it over my shoulder as we sit down.
"Um, Hisao," Kagami says, tapping me on the shoulder. "You're... melting onto your sweater vest."
Uh-oh, she's right. I pull the napkin from the bottom of my cone and quickly dab at the front of my vest, but it's no use - there's a large brown stain right in the middle now. Kagami giggles.
"Just take it off, Hisao. It's too hot for sweater vests today anyhow," my companion says as she lazily bites into the top of her cone. Man, she eats ice cream quickly. She extends her hand to take my cone.
I eye her playfully before handing it to her. "No stealing," I fake-chide. She raises her own ice cream cone to her chest in a "who, me?" gesture. Of course, after I pull my sweater vest over my head, I catch Kagami with her tongue extended, barely touching the side of my cone.
"Hey!" I exclaim as I playfully try to snatch my cone back from her.
"What? I was just fixing it. It was dripping down the side," Kagami huffs, crossing her arms and turning slightly away from me before bursting out in a fit of laughter. I can't help but laugh with her.
This is great. All the anxiety from earlier this week is melting away, and I feel just as good as I did at the festival. I think briefly think back to something Emi said earlier this week about relieving stress. Maybe this is how I need to do it- spending time with Kagami eating ice cream. Definitely an agreeable arrangement.
Kagami finishes her cone significantly faster than I do. "Aren't you gonna get brainfreeze?" I ask.
"Nope. Never had it. It's actually kind of weird." She pauses for a moment, reclining on the bench with her hands behind her head, playing lazily with her braid. "So, what do you want to do until dinner?"
"Is there a park around here? We could go for a walk," I suggest.
Kagami narrows her eyes. "You're asking the wrong girl, Hisao. I'd probably need a map even if I lived here."
Oh, right. Nice going, Hisao. For a moment there I totally forgot Kagami even has a disability.
"Sorry, I... forgot," I say without really thinking about it. Kagami tilts her head quizzically. I should probably clarify. "I-I mean, you just work around it so well, it's hard to remember sometimes, I guess."
Kagami sighs. "Fair enough, I suppose. Although to be honest..." She trails off.
"What?" I ask, curious about what she was going to say next.
"It's nothing. Kind of boring, actually. Let's find that park, ok?" she says, standing up and slinging her violin and purse over her shoulder.
I wonder what she was going to say. It's probably best to not push the matter.
I hand Kagami my map, which she unfolds and studies as I finish my ice cream. After a minute or so, Kagami stands up and points to our left. "Good call on that park, Hisao. It's only a block or two from here. That way, I think."
Sure enough, we arrive at the park, which is surprisingly large considering it's more or less in the middle of the city. There's a group of students playing with a frisbee about fifty meters or so to our left, but besides that, there doesn't seem to be that many people here.
I find a trash can and dispose of the napkins that came with our ice cream. As I turn around, I see Kagami bent over, smelling a patch of flowers. I try to avoid staring at her behind, which looks incredible in those shorts. She turns to face me, a daisy in hand.
"So, Hisao," she says as she weaves the stem of the flower into her braid, "you already know what I want to do after graduation. What about you?"
"Honestly, I haven't given it much thought," I reply. "I guess college was always assumed, but... well, I don't really have any idea what I want to do. I haven't had much time to think about it recently, either."
"True, I suppose," Kagami replies. She looks at me like she's getting ready to ask something, but then directs her gaze forward.
I want to know what she's thinking. "What's up?" I ask.
"Well," she starts before pausing for a minute. "Ok, bear with me here. You have a heart condition, right?" I nod in affirmation. "Ok, and you're at Yamaku because you had a heart attack." I nod again. Kagami exhales. "Phew. I'm having trouble remembering everything I was reading this morning, but I got curious and wanted to ask."
"Ask what?" I inquire, wondering what she could be building up to.
"When were you in the hospital? How long?"
"That's it?" I ask, slightly relieved it wasn't something more serious, whatever that might be.
She shrugs. "Just curious, that's all. I promise, no more pressing questions today." She winks, awaiting my answer.
"A couple of months. My heart attack was in January, and I was only home for a few days before coming to Yamaku two weeks ago," I say.
"Hm," Kagami says. For once, it appears she's the one that's lost in thought. Is that how I look when I think? I've got to be less obvious in the future.
I decide to inquire as to what's on her mind. "Why'd you ask?"
"No reason. Just curiosity, like I said." Kagami swings her violin over to her left side, leaving a bright red mark on her now unoccupied right shoulder. She rubs it nonchalantly and turns her head to look at me with those glassy grey eyes. I'm not exactly sure how they can be so reflective yet so piercing at the same time.
We pass the next half hour or so walking through the park, idly chit-chatting about the weather and school and Kagami's orchestra. She's really passionate about her music, although I suppose I'd be just as passionate about it if I were as good as her. Or maybe vice-versa. Maybe her passion is the reason for her skill.
As I think this, however, Kagami gets ahead of me a few paces, so I jog to catch up. The flower in her hair looks beautiful; the bright yellow and white of the daisy contrasts brilliantly with the dark cherry strands of hair with which it's intertwined. The flower follows the motion of her braid as it sashays gently between her shoulder blades.
"Catch up, slowpoke," she calls over her shoulder as I make the last few paces to rejoin my companion at her side. "Getting tired?" she asks.
"Honestly, no," I reply. "I guess those morning runs with Emi are doing the trick after all."
"Emi? Who's that?" Kagami asks.
I falter. I wonder how well she knows her own classmates. "Um, Emi Ibarazaki. She's on the track team, kind of short, strawberry blonde hair..." I forego mentioning she's also a student in class 3-4 for a few moments. Hopefully Kagami will pick up on it.
"Hm. Sounds familiar," Kagami says as she furrows her brow in thought. "Uh... is she a double amputee? Missing both legs?"
I hadn't even thought of mentioning her disability. It seems so thoroughly un-Emi that it didn't even cross my mind. "Yeah, that's her," I say.
"Ok, she's in my class. 3-4. You run with her in the mornings?"
"Yeah, Nurse sort of set it up as a way to get my heart back into... well, not-killing-me shape."
"I suppose that's a good thing." She scratches her chin casually. "So you're up early every morning, trying to get your heart better."
"I guess that's one way of putting it," I say, curious as to where she's going with this line of conversation.
"Hm," she says, pausing for a moment. "I guess I never realized how similar we are, if you're into that whole sappy 'oh-my-god twinsies' thing."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I'm up a few hours before class too. Every day. I... well, I have kind of a crazy complicated system. Long and short of it is that I'm rebuilding my memory from my journal, pretty much every day."
I suppose she has a point. Although given my apparent quick progress, I wonder...
"Has it..." I briefly hesitate before I ask. But Kagami smiles warmly, as if to give me permission to ask, so I do. "Has it gotten better? Your memory? Over time, I mean."
"It has. Not a lot of progress recently, but let's just say I'm a lot better now than I was the first year or two after my accident. The journal's something they suggested in therapy. Then, I couldn't remember anything without its help. Now I can usually fill in the gaps ok by myself, with the proper reminders. My records don't have to be as detailed as they were."
I'm not sure exactly what to say right now, but something seems better than nothing. Kagami's been pretty open today, so I suppose there's no harm in asking. "What all... well, what do you remember of... before?"
Kagami's furrows her brow and scrunches her mouth into a tight pattern, her expression indicative of deep thought. "Bits and pieces I guess. Some things more clearly than others. I remember my old primary school pretty well, violin recitals, weekends with my mother, things like that. We went to the beach during the summers, at least once every year." She pauses, closing her eyes and smiling. "I remember mother yelling at me for swimming too far out into the ocean. Building sand castles and digging moats for the tide to fill. Eating picnics on the beach and getting sand in my sandwiches."
I remember something Kagami said at the Shanghai. "Your father never came with you?"
"Ha," Kagami says bitterly. "Him? No, he was far too concerned with his work to spend time with his wife and daughter. To be honest I never really saw him much, except for family gatherings and holidays. Mother and I were low-maintenance, which I'm sure is what he preferred."
"Were?" I ask, not really thinking about the subject I'm asking Kagami to delve into.
"Yeah, were. After my accident, I... well, I became a liability, which is one step worse than an inconvenience."
"And your mother? She couldn't...?"
Kagami turns and faces me, her expression a mixture of frustration and sullenness. She stares at me for what seems like hours with those deep grey eyes, boring a hole into my skull with her stare. After a while, she lowers her gaze.
"No, she couldn't. She was just another liability for my father to sweep under the rug and forget about. Which he promptly did. I never even saw the asshole after. Just his assistant."
She faces forward again, staring at the cracks in the pavement as we walk.
"Kagami, I..."
"It's not your fault, Hisao," she says wistfully. "I'm not upset with you."
"That's good," I reply inanely.
We continue walking in silence for a moment, but Kagami soon turns to face me and smiles mischievously. Apparently she's snapped out of whatever bad mood I may have accidentally put her in. "You know what else is good?" she asks.
"I have a feeling you're about to tell me," I reply.
"Pizza!" she says, and points across the street to a small awning with the word "Pizza" written across it in green, red, and white lettering. I guess we've reached the other edge of the park. I wonder where we are?
However, that train of thought is quickly derailed by the smell of pizza wafting across the street and my subsequently growling stomach. We can figure it out later; we have a map, after all. Pizza first.
After Kagami and I order, we sit down in a booth in the middle of the restaurant. There doesn't seem to be anyone else here, save for the lone waitress and the cooks. It almost reminds me of the Shanghai, in a strange way. What doesn't remind me of the Shanghai, however, is the particularly large pie that's placed in front of us after about fifteen minutes. It's plastered with pepperoni, green peppers, mushrooms, and onions; this particular combination of flavors is new to me. However, as I bite into my first piece, I can quickly see why Kagami insisted on ordering the pizza exactly as it sits before us. It's delicious.
"Mmm. You were right," I say as I ingest my second mouthful of the delicious food cupped in my hands.
"See? I told you," Kagami says, a smug satisfied look on her face. "I propose there is no better pizza topping combination in the world. Although, if somebody were to tell me about one, I'd actually be ok with it. Better pizza, and all." Kagami takes a vigorous bite out of her slice as she finishes her sentence.
I chuckle in between bites. "I don't think you'd find anyone in Japan who eats enough pizza to challenge you," I say. Although, from what little I've experienced, Kenji could possibly give her a run for her money. I guess he'd be a pizza savant, if in fact he were any kind of savant. Which doesn't seem likely in the first place.
Kagami laughs. "I very much doubt that. But I'm flattered, none the less." I briefly ponder telling her about Kenji, but that's a can of worms that's better left unopened.
We finish what's left of the rather large pizza in a short time, surprisingly. I must have been really hungry. Normally I don't even eat unhealthy food. I suppose one time won't kill me, though.
"I can't believe I ate that much," Kagami says as she leans back against the booth we're seated in. "Sorry I'm so gross."
"It's fine, I ate just as much," I reply, taking a similar position against the backside of my booth. We sit in silence for a short time before Kagami snatches the bill from the table and walks up to the front of the restaurant to pay, leaving me no time to protest. Oh well, I did buy the ice cream after all.
We exit the restaurant into the early evening sun, which is already starting to cast long shadows onto the streets. With minimal discussion, we make our way back to the appropriate bus stop, where we luckily happen upon a bus heading back to Yamaku already stopped beside the small glass enclosure. We pay our fare and take two seats near the back of the bus.
As the bus chugs out of the city, the greenery of the surrounding countryside begins to fill the windows. Kagami's gaze is fixed on the passing scenery blazing past the glass in front of her.
"I had a good time today," I say. "Thanks for inviting me."
"Thanks for coming. I really like hanging out with you, Hisao."
She doesn't avert her eyes, but I can see her smiling in the reflection in the window. "It's different, you know? The country? I never really got outside the city much when I was a kid."
"Neither did I," I respond.
"City kid too, huh?" she asks rhetorically. "I guess that's why I like the city here so much. It sort of reminds me of home, on a smaller scale. At least what I remember of home."
I lean into my seat and think back to our conversation about her family. I wonder what could have happened to her mother. Maybe something happened to both of them in the same accident?
Speaking of which, I also don't have any idea about the specifics of her accident, either. I suppose it's only fair- I haven't exactly been forthcoming about the situation surrounding my heart attack. It'd be too assuming of me to expect her to share it unprovoked. She's been so open with me about things that I'm sure must be uncomfortable for her, asking her about her accident now seems selfish.
But I'm broken out of my introspection by a soft, but constant force on my right shoulder. I glance to my right. Kagami's leaning on my shoulder, her arm pressed into mine, still facing the window. I look in the reflection to see if she's asleep. Her eyes are closed- should I say something? But almost if she can read my mind, she speaks up.
"Is this ok?"
"It's... it's fine." I say, the hints of a smile creeping into the corners of my mouth.
"Good," she replies, smiling, and presses her shoulder deeper into my arm.
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