LordDarknus wrote:Yeah, I think Silent Cook really doesn't like crossovers either (read it somewhere on the forum). Nor does he appreciate huge posts that might "glitch" the forum software (like the one I unfortunately made above ..oh boy). Two things I seem to unintentionally do a lot of actually.
That was all I saw in my head when I read that quote.
I do like how you were able to... base(?) this on the picture at the end. Being able to craft something of a story off of one piece like that I believe is a good skill to have. I hesitate to say easily inspired though, sounds almost condescending. I believe if you had mixed the two worlds a little more evenly (50:50 instead of the 80:20 it feels like) you could have turned the entire story into about the school scenes. That may have been more interesting... or not, as it lacks giant robots fighting. It would definitively be a larger project to work on though, not a quick little thing.
Making it a past tense recollection did kind of mess up what you mentioned about the everyone dies bit. You'd have to pull a Shyamalan (or a Doomish) to get that feeling back. Not that this piece was geared towards that, as far as I can see. It was a fun little piece to read in my opinion. So well done!