Hisao and Kenji- Master Detectives! Conclusion? Update

[Helbereth]

As you said, it's brief.

No blaring errors in grammar to note, so you can relax your tightened sphincter.

My only question is this: Is Hanako going to, at some point, discover that her idiot husband has been gallivanting around the world nearly getting himself killed -by bullets or heart attacks- chasing down heavily armored and fortified secret societies?

I know you can't answer, really, but IMHO, I think Hanako would be great with a Tesla. For some reason, I have an image of her in a skin-tight, black and white outfit with a long silvery cape, her eyes glowing white as she arcs Tesla-assisted lightning bolts into a crowd of terrified Templar troglodytes.

Yeah; I just put Hanako and Storm in the same body.

[Hoitash]

Is Hanako going to, at some point, discover that her idiot husband has been gallivanting around the world nearly getting himself killed -by bullets or heart attacks- chasing down heavily armored and fortified secret societies?

Maybe. I direct you to this fic's use of past tense and the occupation of the Narrator's wife. And you forgot explosions.

No blaring errors in grammar to note, so you can relax your tightened sphincter.

Emi has Mondays, not Saturdays, so my sphincter is naturally tight at this time.

...Uh...

[Helbereth]

And you forgot explosions.

They were implied by the timbre of my statement.

[Hoitash]

They were implied by the timbre of my statement.

Ah, I see. Sorry, then.

[LOL WUT]

Hey Hoitash, You Want These Skittles?

Thafts Tho Bafd, I jufst arte tfhem all.

Those were delicious.

[Hoitash]

Hey Hoitash, You Want These Skittles?

Thafts Tho Bafd, I jufst arte tfhem all.

Those were delicious.

Eh, I'll just find Martin Lawrence and ask him for some.

I've been looking for an excuse to start my TV writing career, anyway, and I already have summer Glau living under my desk.

[Tormound]

So much talk of templars and secret organizations and nothing on the Assassin Order. Although, maybe im just playing to much games. Anyway great writing, not sure if i want more interactions with the girls from Yamaku or more great action scenes. Decisions, decisions.

[Hoitash]

So much talk of templars and secret organizations and nothing on the Assassin Order. Although, maybe im just playing to much games. Anyway great writing, not sure if i want more interactions with the girls from Yamaku or more great action scenes. Decisions, decisions.

Why not have both? I intend for this to run for a while yet.

My summers are very boring.

[Hoitash]

In 2012, a struggling writer escaped from a minimum security apartment after being convicted of a crime he did commit. This writer now survives as a soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, and if you can find him, maybe you can hire… Mr. Hoitash.


Mystery Four: Templar, Templar


Part One: The Plan


There’s something about Saturdays that feel weird to me. Maybe it’s because I spend half the day teaching and the other half in my partner’s office sitting in a chair being useless- or mostly useless, depending. Sometimes I see the appeal of not having classes on Saturdays.

My partner was a private detective. He was also a writer, but he wasn’t doing that very much at the time. Lately he spent his time between cases planning his next move against the Secret Societies that infested the world. Kenji Setou may be insane, but he’s the man for the job, all right. Dedicated, passionate, and better armed then a Mexican drug cartel. He’s also legally blind, so I tended to do most of the effective shooting, which isn’t very good for my heart condition, but I hadn’t had a serious flutter since Kyoto.

Kenji’s office was a nice, well lit room, with hard wood floors, bookcases, green metal cabinets, and an old dark wooden desk that matched nothing else in the room. Kenji was pacing between a couple of iron lamps while I sat in a brown leather rolling chair, reading a book and sipping a shot of whiskey. A half empty pizza box dominated the desk, along with some papers, a laptop, and the blueprint of what looked like an old Buddhist sanctuary. I was afraid to ask Kenji about that- the last time we had gone to a remote location, we almost didn’t get out. That had been about five weeks ago, and I guess he was anxious to get shot at again, because he finally sat down behind his desk and slammed his fist on the blueprint.

“The time has come!” he shouted. I sighed and put my book down.

“For what?” I asked.

Kenji frowned, “duh, man: to kick the Illuminati in the balls and frame the Templars for it. I thought you were paying attention?”

“You lost me when you made the blueprint.”

“This blueprint is the lynchpin of our operation, man!”

“When did we declare war on the Buddhists?” I asked. I was humoring him- I knew the sanctuary was actually an Illuminati listening post. Besides, I wouldn’t deface a genuine structure of my wife’s chosen faith.

Kenji raised an eyebrow behind his thick, round glasses, “very funny, man. You know full well what this sanctuary is. The Illuminati have been trying for decades to oust the Templars from Thailand. This listening post has allowed them to severely hamper Templar operations in south-east Asia. The Templars have been unable to locate the post and take it out, but thanks to the information we acquired from the Freemasons,” he paused for a moment of silence, “we can finally take the fight to them, willingly for once.”

“And you’re going to want my help,” I added.

“Well, are you my partner or not?”

“Only two nights a week. The rest of the time I’m just your best friend.”

“Well, be my best bro and help me kick the Templars in the balls.”

I really, really should’ve known better, but I couldn’t help asking him about his plan, starting with how he planned to get into Thailand undetected.

“That’s easy. Mr. Sarif’s associate at the US embassy, John, says he officially owes us a favor for what we did for him. He can fly us in within a few miles of the base, and from there it’s a short hike up the mountain.”

“And you expect me to survive a hike how?”

“We take it nice and slow, man. Don’t worry, the Illuminati don’t patrol the mountain, and we’ll be camouflaged, Viet Cong style.”

Considering most of the Viet Cong had died, that didn’t reassure me. I said as much, and had to endure a half hour summation of the US/Vietnam conflict. I’m still not sure why. When he was done with that, he went back to his earlier spiel.

“Once we get to the mountain, getting in is easy,” he tapped the south wall of the sanctuary, “this wall is over the edge of the cliff, with a narrow pass under it. The path is pretty dangerous, according to the blueprint, and the wall itself has a crack in it. With some explosives I can make us a hole and a way in.”

“Won’t that alert them to our presence?” I asked. Never mind why they didn’t maintain the pass- only a lunatic would try and blow a hole through the back entrance while on an unstable ledge.

“You bet it will! That’s the point.”

“What.”

Kenji had always been a bit off, but now I was worried he had jumped off the deep end into full time Crazyville, population him. He laughed and leaned in closer to me.

“The idea isn’t that we’re not spotted, the idea is that they spot us, think we’re Templars, and then we get the fuck out before they kill us.”

“Oh, is that all. In that case, count me out.”

“C’mon, man. I need you for this. Who else will watch my back when I swipe the data from their hard drives? Who else will make sure we blow their surveillance equipment? This is a two man op, and you’re my number two! Don’t you want a world free of Secret Societies for your kids to grow up in?”

I groaned- that was below the belt, and he knew it. Literally, actually.

“All right, fine, I’m in. But you’re babysitting next weekend. And never call me your number two again.”

Kenji smiled diabolically, grinning like the Joker when he shot Batgirl. Spoiler alert, by the way, “good man. Don’t worry, I’ve planned for everything. We use our Tesla weapons only, so they’ll think it’s the Templars. The Templar’s will deny it all, of course, but us taking the information will make the Illuminati retaliate to retrieve it. When the two start escalating the war again, the Hospitallers will jump in, and at that point all we have to do is wait for the Freemason agents to finish the job.”

Well, it was ambitious, I gave him that, “you know they won’t make a statue of you for this, right? I think they used that money for the commemorative painting of me and my wife when we sponsored a scholarship to Yamaku. They finally replaced that horrible painting at the end of the hall.”

Kenji frowned at my left ear, “of course I know that, man. This isn’t about glory anymore, this is about ensuring humanity’s survival. The Templars and the Illuminati will cause World War III if it gets them control over the ashes. We have a solemn duty to protect this world from their ilk!”

I clapped slowly, “very good. When were you planning on running for political office?”

Kenji snorted, “and become a tool of the moronic masses? Yeah, right. So you like the plan.”

I nodded slowly, “it seems okay so far. I do have one question- do you have a backup plan if we can’t fry their security footage?” We’d been lucky in that regard a few times, but I didn’t feel like pushing my luck much anymore.

Kenji nodded, “we wear disguises. I’ve found some Templar assassin outfit designs in the info from Mr. Hakamichi, and I’ve managed to have decent mock-ups made. We wear them during the op, and we’re good even if we can’t blow the data.”

My partner, the Asian Rambo Ninja James Bond, “alright, when do you plan on us taking this field trip to hell in a handbasket?”

“Tonight, of course. I’ve already called Hanako that we’re working late, and John has the cargo plane ready and waiting for us.”

“Plane? Are we landing on a road?”

Kenji scoffed, “no, we’re parachuting in, of course.”

…Crap.

+++

Next Chapter

Tuck and roll, man. Tuck and roll.

Could someone explain the Saturday half-day thing for me?

[Helbereth]

Okay, so, in between toying with WoW beta (pet battles are awesome but currently broken), I read through this. Sounds like Kenji is taking chances with their lives, and Hisao might just be starting to like the adrenaline rush. Thank heaven someone finally thought to change that awful painting in the hallway at Yamaku.

There's some off-kilter language use here and there, and a few sentences ending weirdly -some that ought to be hyphenated away from the rest of the text- but the prose is otherwise clean.

I can't wait to be imagining Metal Gear infiltration music while they hike through the jungle and make their way out onto that narrow ledge.

[Hoitash]

There's some off-kilter language use here and there, and a few sentences ending weirdly -some that ought to be hyphenated away from the rest of the text- but the prose is otherwise clean.

Yeah, I fiddled with this part a bit more then I probably should have. I needed the clarity the revisions brought me, though, so it works out.

I can't wait to be imagining Metal Gear infiltration music while they hike through the jungle and make their way out onto that narrow ledge.

Hmm. Your optimism is inspiring

Sounds like Kenji is taking chances with their lives, and Hisao might just be starting to like the adrenaline rush. Thank heaven someone finally thought to change that awful painting in the hallway at Yamaku.

Taking chances? The whole fiasco in the dry cleaner's basement wasn't a walk in the park, you know. As for Hisao, I think he's redirecting his White Knight energy to something more productive then coddling his girlfriend. Death to those terrible paintings! Er, no offense to the KS artists- I'm sure they were meant to look like that.

Okay, so, in between toying with WoW beta (pet battles are awesome but currently broken), I read through this.

God I miss Star Wars Galaxies.

[Hoitash]

Shits goin’ down, someone get tehsmarty!

Previous Chapter

Part Two: Border Descent


As I sat in the back of a cargo plane flying low over the mountains of Thailand in the middle of the night, I made a mental note to beat Kenji to death with a whiskey bottle if we didn’t make it out of this. This was without a doubt the craziest thing we had ever done. Of course, at any point I could have said no, but Kenji was right- didn’t I owe it to my children to ensure them a better world?

I owed them a father who didn’t die in Thailand with no forwarding address, but I didn’t think of that until I was in the damn plane. Except for the two of us and the pilot and copilot in front, the plane was empty. Kenji wasn’t kidding when he said we would be disguised- we were both wearing dark blue outfits that reminded me of a ninja, if he had gone on the crusades. We both had on goggles- who knew they made prescription goggles? Parachutes were strapped to our backs, and it was only when I strapped mine on that I thought to ask him if he knew how to use a parachute. His response was “of course, man. I wouldn’t of planned for it otherwise.”

Considering how screwey this plan was- not to mention how likely it was to get me killed- it was some relief that in the weaponry department, we were both well equipped. We each had six Tesla grenades, our Tesla pistols securely holstered to our belts, and our Tesla rifles strapped to our fronts over our body armor. Our Tesla swords were securely strapped to our fronts, too. I was concerned that our only weapons were based on charges, but the Tesla rifles could fire at least twenty shots in quick succession before overheating. That and their self recharge easily made up for the measly five shots our pistols had. We had strapped their chargers to our belts anyway. All the weight made my heart tense a bit, but during the flight I had gotten used to the load.

Now it just had to get used to parachuting into a foreign country illegally. If I didn’t kill Kenji, my wife just might. The pilot said something in English to Kenji who told me that it was time to go. He had to yell over the noise of the engine as we sputtered along. The plane was so old I was surprised it still flew, but it wouldn’t be the first time a hunk of military surplus kept us alive. Kenji stood up and grabbed the cable that had been hooked up along the right side of the plane, over a row of uncomfortable black padded seats. I stood up and did the same.

“Remember,” Kenji shouted as he hooked the cable with a tether, “you have to pull the chord three seconds after we’re out of the plane, or else you won’t be slow enough when we hit the ground and you’ll splat.”

“Thanks for the image!” I yelled back. The rear hatch of the plane started to whir and groan as it slowly lowered. The air rushed out and if it wasn’t for our tethers to the chairs, we would’ve been flung out the hatch. Which was more or less how we were getting out, just more controlled. I made sure my helmet was secured as we started shuffling along the cable closer to the hatch. The pilot said something and Kenji undid his tether to the chair. Sighing and saying goodbye to the last of my sanity, I did the same. Holding firmly onto the cable, we managed to slide a few more steps before jumping out into the night sky as the tether to the cable snapped off on its own. We were able to aim ourselves correctly, facing down towards the open road leading up to the mountain as the ground got annoyingly closer to us.

I quickly yanked my parachute chord and it unfurled behind me in a whoosh, hefting me back a few inches as I descended. I looked around and saw Kenji to my left and a few feet below me. The parachutes were dark blue, and when we weren’t shot at I figured we had either avoided detection, or a group of very angry Illuminati with large guns were waiting for us in the forest. Kenji had planned for that, of course, and said they’d want us alive for torture and summary execution.

At least my heart wasn’t going off. The fortunate thing about tuck and roll was if you suffer a chest concussion in the process, not only are you doing it wrong, but you’re probably dead regardless of a heart condition The ground came pretty quick, and we both managed to tuck and roll successfully, though I ended up tangled in the parachute in the process. Before I could untangle myself, I was dragged off the road into the trees. I thrashed at whoever it was until Kenji told me it was him.

“Sorry about that,” I said as I finally managed to extricate myself from the parachute lines.

“Don’t worry about it,” Kenji said, “you’re prepared, good job. Now get on the bounce, we gotta go.”

Great, he had read Starship Troopers. Well, if we had Templar power armor, we could be a lot less sneaky, at least. I adjusted my sword to my left side and readied my rifle. Kenji’s rifle was already out and ready as we scanned the area around us. It was dark. There were trees. We were to the right of the narrow unpaved dirt path up the mountain. How exciting.

“Clear,” Kenji whispered. He waited for me to say the same thing before we started moving up. We were at the base of the mountain, and the trees stopped following the path about a hundred meters ahead of us. That was the most dangerous part of the mission, Kenji said- getting up the mountain undetected. Never mind jumping out of a plane or climbing around a cliff, both at night. No, walking uphill was the big danger. Thanks to my running routine, it was probably the least physically risky for me, at least, especially if we kept it slow like Kenji planned.

I wasn’t too surprised when we saw four figures dressed in white armor descending the dirt path. We waited by the edge of the forest, even the various animals around us silent as the four came closer. Kenji pulled out a Tesla grenade and motioned for me to tap him when they were close enough. He may not be able to see, but he has a good arm and disturbingly accurate aim. We were both crouching behind a tree, and the four were taking a long time to look around. I reached towards my belt and brought a pair of night vision binoculars to my eyes. Like I said, Kenji had planned for this very thoroughly.

The four were definitely Illuminati, dressed in white body armor and helmets. Each one had a pair of night vision lenses snapped down over their eyes, and they all had imposing looking rifles steadied as they looked around. Each one had a pistol of some sort and saber- I could tell from the sheath- strapped and holstered to their belts. I wondered for a moment if they had thermal scanning as well. When one of them shot at us, I knew they did.

I ducked down further as a burst of fire went over my head. A warning shot. Kenji groaned and rolled the grenade before ducking down. Before they could fire again the grenade went off, sending bursts and arcs of blue electricity around the four. As the grenade sputtered out they collapsed to the ground.

“Their equipment’ll be fried,” I whispered.

“I know.”

With their radios dead more would probably come after us. One problem at a time, I guess. As we started our crouched ascent up the hill I kept my binoculars out, scanning the forest and the mountainside. Kenji was right about the mountain being devoid of cameras or any remote defenses. Looking up, I could see one of the aging dark stone walls of the sanctuary reaching toward the sky. As we passed the guards, Kenji took there weapons off of them and tossed them down behind us. That would give them something to do on the way out.

“They’ll be pissed when we get back,” I said. Getting out of Thailand was almost as easy as getting in. While the plane that dropped us off was leaving, an old re-fitted helicopter would be coming in from the US embassy in Thailand to pick us up and drop us off in Japan. I tried very hard not to think of all the laws that was breaking when Kenji had told it to me. At least we had a way out of this mess.

The way up the hill took some time, as we paced ourselves to prevent my heart from giving me any problems. At the halfway point I spotted another four figures making their way down towards us, except this time they opened fire as soon as they saw us- we didn’t exactly have anywhere to hide. We did manage to hug the mountainside while they fired at us. We both leveled out Tesla rifles: sleek, dark metal devices with a small glass cylinder filled with blue-purple energy jolting between two poles where the bullet would normally be chambered. I fired first, and managed to hit one just before the arc fizzled out. Realizing they were in range of us they ducked back. My eyes had adjusted to the light, so I could see two of them toss grenades down towards us. Fortunately they rolled by and exploded harmlessly behind us, though the noise hurt for a bit. Kenji fired a couple of wide shots while I tossed a grenade of my own. I was a little high, but the incline of the path made up for that as the grenade took out the three figures.

“We keep this up, every soldier on the base will be after us,” I said.

“Nah, they won’t risk sending anyone else out,” Kenji said, “they’ll want to bolster the defenses inside.”

I rolled my eyes and kept moving; we may have lost the element of surprise, but we didn’t exactly have anything better to do tonight. This time I took care of their weapons, tossing them down the hillside below, after taking a couple of frag grenades, just in case. As we made our way up I was able to see the front gate, a sturdy light wooden structure waiting at the end of the path. I also noticed that the ledge we were supposed to use was gone. It must’ve crumbled away since the data was compiled.

“The ledge is gone,” I said, “now what?”

Kenji grinned and nodded at the barely visible front gate. I glanced back, then at Kenji, and a horrible feeling seeped its way into my balls.

“Oh, no!” I said, “we are not going through the front door!”

“Why not, man? It’s worked every time before.”

“The law of averages is against us, then. Besides, how will we retrieve the data with the entire base shooting at us? Sooner or later they’ll give up trying to take us alive.”

“I planned for that, man. Relax.”

Unfortunately we didn’t have any other choice, so I sighed and signaled for Kenji to move forward. As we got closer, I actually started to admire the aging stone structure. The walls were roughly eight to ten meters high, and the big wooden gate was probably two meters high and almost as wide. The walls looked pretty sturdy, despite their age. From the outside, it looked just like any other sanctuary, Buddhist or otherwise.

I remembered from the blueprints that the sanctuary was a big square, with most of the equipment in the basement. I could just make out the satellite dishes and antennae to our left, surrounded by either natural shrubs or fake ones. Not the best hiding job from the ground, but from the air it probably did a decent job, and this sanctuary was remote enough visitors probably didn’t drop by very often. Fortunately the place didn’t have parapets, or we’d have half the base shooting at us. As it was I heard two dull thunks above us. I quickly scanned the walls and could just make out a slowly rising head on each side of the gate.

“Ladders on the inside of the walls,” I said.

“Book it,” Kenji bolted for the door, easing to the right of the gate. I crouch-ran the rest of the way to the gate’s left just as their fire shot passed us. Sounded like they were using sniper rifles. Kenji grinned at me as he pulled two large clumps of C-4 from his belt. He had enough of the stuff to blast the door, according to him. I nodded and he slammed the two explosives onto the center of the gate just as I heard the grenades drop down around us. He armed the explosives as we bolted for the corners, our only safety from the explosion. I rounded the corner just as the grenades and C-4 went off. The noise ruptured the relative silence of the mountains, and I heard chattering birds having a fit as their night sleep was interrupted. I shook my head and checked my heart. It thudded hard once before calming down. I wheeled around and readied my rifle, peering around the corner. As the dust settled I rushed next to the broken and splintered remains of the gate, Kenji doing the same on the other side.

“You ready?” Kenji asked.

“Sure, why the hell not?” I asked. I readied a grenade at the same time he did, and we both tossed them into the sanctuary. When they were done jolting electricity we stepped into the remains of the gate and inside the Illuminati base.

+++

Next Chapter

Pro-tip, kids: entering a country by parachute is a bad idea. Awesome, but bad.

[Helbereth]

Waiting on a plane:
Introduction

At the gates of a fast drop:
Countdown to Disaster

Freefall and fast landing:
Punching Dogs

Nighttime stealth:
Cavern

!
Encounter

Climbing the hill:
Russian Soldiers from Kasatka

Second encounter:
Battle

Up the hill to the gates:
Discovery

C-4 Party
Yell "Dead Cell"

This time I took care of there weapons

For shame. You were doing so well.

Onward!

[Tormound]

Excellent work again, keep up the good work.

[Hoitash]

For shame. You were doing so well.

You saw nothing. Nothing!

(Thanks, btw )

Onward!

Indeed.

Excellent work again, keep up the good work.

Thanks , I'll do my best.