Stupid Crack "Ideas"

[Roxius]

To free myself of all my stupid little ridiculous "crack ideas", I've decided to just write them all at once...so here ya go.

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"Good morning, Hisao-kun!" Lilly called out from behind as Hisao was making his way to class that morning. How did she know that it was Hisao, though? That's a story for another day.

"Oh, good morning, Lilly-" Hisao was instantly cut off when he realized that Lilly was flipping him the middle finger.

'...HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGHHH!!!!'

Lilly cocked her head to the side. "...Hisao-kun? Is everything alright?"

"Uh..." Hisao wasn't really sure how to respond; why the hell was Lilly giving him the finger? Wasn't she supposed to be a prim and proper kind of girl? What was the world coming to? Had Satan stolen his soul and cast it to some parallel dimension where wrong is right and right is wrong? It was all so confusing!!!

"Hisao-kun, why aren't you answering me?!"

Hisao immediately snapped back to reality. "Ah...ah...s-sorry, Lilly...I was just...just so shocked for a moment there..."

"...Why?"

"You're...you're giving me the middle finger..."

Lilly gasped in horror, and then flames literally burst out of the ground as her rage reached maximum level. "W-WHAT?!! ...OH, THAT LITTLE BITCH HANAKO-CHAN TRICKED ME AGAIN!!!"

Hisao raised an eyebrow and grinned. '...AGAIN? Heh...that's kinky...'


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Hisao Nakai couldn't keep the grin off of his face. This was it. He and Hanako were finally going to have sex for the very first time. He had worked long and hard to get to this point, but he had finally made it. He had...arrived.

FINAL DESTINATION!!!!

"...A-A-Are you r-ready, Hisao-kun...?" Hanako asked, as she unbuttoned the first button on her nightshirt.

Hisao nodded his head, and a trail of drool trickled slowly down his chin. "Yeah...I'm definitely ready for this, Hanako-chan..."

Hanako smiled, and immediately unbuttoned the rest of her shirt, and tossed it carelessly over her shoulder. All she had on left was a white laced bra and a very skimpy pair of panties. Drawing his eyes to Hanako's crotch area, Hisao suddenly noticed something rather strange...

...what was up with that large, pointy bulge?

'Uh...' Hisao scratched his head in confusion. Hanako cocked her head slightly to the side; she was waiting for him to pounce on her.

That was when it came to him. 'Oh! That's a p-'

"HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGHHH!!!!!"

Hisao collapsed onto the floor, and Hanako's boner was officially killed.


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"...MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!"

Misha spun around in response just in time to see Hisao reach out, and grab tightly onto both of her "drills". Shizune would have cried out loud had she not been cursed with being both deaf and mute since birth.

"...THEY'RE MINE!!!" Hisao roared, pulling with all of his might. He had the look of a madman in his eyes.

"Ahhh!!" Misha screamed, tears flowing down her cheeks, "S...Stop it, Hiichan...!!!!"

A loud tearing sound filled the air, and Hisao was now clutching both of Misha's drills in his hands. Misha herself simply stood in place, looking totally traumatized. Shizune opened her mouth in a voiceless scream.

"Ha ha ha..." Hisao chuckled, "I knew...I KNEW they were fake!!"

Suddenly, a spray of blood burst from Misha's mouth, drenching both Hisao and Shizune in the crimson liquid. The pink-haired girl then toppled backwards onto the floor, and slowly shrank until she was about a fifth of her original size. It was Hisao's turn to be traumatized now.

Shizune gasped again, and quickly made hand signs. 'Hisao, you idiot! Those drills are Misha's lifeline! Put them back on now! Now! Quickly! Before she dies...!!!'

Hisao could do nothing but stare with his mouth agape as Misha's body continued to shrivel up like a prune...


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"...You shouldn't have chosen Lilly over me, Hisao..."

Hisao let out a gasp as he spun around to see Hanako standing in the doorway. He had never seen her look so vividly pissed before. It was both frightening and alluring at the same time. Clutching at his chest, Hisao took a single step back.

"I'm...I'm sorry, Hanako-chan," Hisao said, his voice shaking, "B-But...I do love Lilly...you're just a very good friend...I'm sorry if I hurt you..."

"Oh...you DID hurt me...don't worry about that," Hanako took a step closer, and Hisao took another step back. He suddenly hit up against a counter. He was trapped now; his only way out being blocked by a very peeved cripple girl.

"I'll punish you for not choosing me," Slowly, Hanako raised her hand up to her face, and brushed back the hair that was covering her right eye. What Hisao saw next both shocked and disturbed him.

Hanako...possessed the Mangekyo Sharingan in her right eye.

"NOW...DIE!!!!" Hanako exclaimed, and an eruption of black flames burst out of her eye, setting Hisao ablaze.

Hisao died soon after, and Hanako set off to dispose of Lilly in the same manner...


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Hisao had nothing better to do, so he snuck into Kenji's room while the bespectacled boy was sleeping, and drew a small lightning bolt on his forehead with a permanent marker.


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"Go into the kitchen where ya belong and make me eggs, bitch!" Hisao snapped, slapping Rin in the back of the head.

Rin sighed, looking down at the stumps she's called 'her arms' for her entire life. "...I can't..."

"GAAAAAHHH!!!" Infuriated, Hisao let off some steam by bashing Rin around some more.

[PCJedi]

Well that was... random. So random, it made my Delta senses tingle.

[DuaneMoody]

"GAAAAAHHH!!!" Infuriated, Hisao let off some steam by bashing Rin around some more.

I was okay until this part. 10 demerits.

[disturbedthoughts]

Hisao had nothing better to do, so he snuck into Kenji's room while the bespectacled boy was sleeping, and drew a small lightning bolt on his forehead with a permanent marker.

[overmind2000]

Hisao had nothing better to do, so he snuck into Kenji's room while the bespectacled boy was sleeping, and drew a small lightning bolt on his forehead with a permanent marker.

Hahaha, this needs to be in the game.

[spankypants]

you're ideas are bad and you should feel bad

[Snicket]

i dunno i thought some of them were pretty funny

[Roxius]

you're ideas are bad and you should feel bad

Well, don't worry. Now that I got rid of this crappy ideas from my mind, I can now focus on writing more serious things for KS...

[SnigendePind]

Thanks for making my day better AGAIN AGAIN Roxius! =D

[Forever]

Damn! the kenji one almost made me spit out my soda! Couldn't stop laughing for like 2 minutes!

[Roxius]

There's actually one more idea that I need to get out because it's really stupid, and it's mainly revolved around Hisao being forced to crossdress by the Nurse and Muto, and a crazy, drunk naked Hanako with a lampshade on her head...

...so beware.

[lurk moar]

Do eeet.

I guffawed quite heartily.

[Krull]

Suddenly I feel like KS has gone Excel Saga........

Weeeeeeeeird.

[Roxius]

Suddenly I feel like KS has gone Excel Saga........

Weeeeeeeeird.

Really? Never watched that show...although I know about it. I've learned everything about anime from AMVs and wikipedia! :B

[Krull]

Suddenly I feel like KS has gone Excel Saga........

Weeeeeeeeird.

Really? Never watched that show...although I know about it. I've learned everything about anime from AMVs and wikipedia! :B

It's like what you wrote,only worse.

Think of a woman with this disorder-called death,she pukes blood all the time but keeps coming back...and that's just the start.