In Ruin [Hisao, Miki, Lilly neutral end] [now with epilogue]

[Doomish]

Forget it.

[Vekter]

Fuck.

Good story. I feel like Hisao kind of deserved it in a really fucked-up, cosmic way, but no one should have to go through that. Ever.

[Bi-Polar Hernandez]

....


Jesus. Christ.

[Henry Spencer]

Great story, Doomish. Great, but sad.

[Mahorfeus]

Yay, yay, Doomish is on a happy streeeeea-

*reads story*

MY FEELS. NOT AGAIN.

In all seriousness, sorry you had a rough day. It's good that you're able to vent through creativity... frankly, I'm incapable of venting gracefully.

[Scissorlips]

They say to write what you know. While I wish you didn't know the things that helped you write something like this, there's no denying that the story itself is expertly crafted and emotionally poignant. Well done and get well soon, Doomish.

[nemz]

I'm actually more than a little confused here... just what is Lilly's actual motivation? If it was just pointless sex she was looking for she's found it, but it doesn't satisfy her. Then she says she HAS found someone that could replace Hisao, but she just wants sex from him? She says she's stopped loving Hisao, actually seems to hate, yet she's still carrying on desperately hoping he'll come 'fix' her? WHAT?

Either she doesn't have the slightest idea what she wants (entirely possible) or she's making all this up as a defense mechanism because of Miki's utterly tactless approach.

And then again, what is Miki doing here? If she was planning to lie about the depth of the relationship and intentionally sink his lingering strings to Lilly, why would she record it? Even if she does think it's for his own good there's no reason to let him hear that. On top of that, why does she then not immediately drop what she's doing and try to let him down easy instead of tossing him to the wolves like that? That's not love, girl.

[andros414]

I'm actually more than a little confused here... just what is Lilly's actual motivation? If it was just pointless sex she was looking for she's found it, but it doesn't satisfy her. Then she says she HAS found someone that could replace Hisao, but she just wants sex from him? She says she's stopped loving Hisao, actually seems to hate, yet she's still carrying on desperately hoping he'll come 'fix' her? WHAT?

Either she doesn't have the slightest idea what she wants (entirely possible) or she's making all this up as a defense mechanism because of Miki's utterly tactless approach.

Sounds like a few things happened with Lilly: (1) Sex with Hisao was so great that she can't get the same feeling from other men. (2) Akira was trying to set Lilly up with other men to help her get over Hisao, both of which led Lilly to her current state. Some of what she said could be straight up lies, though, in defense against Miki (it's not hard to exaggerate when angry).

And then again, what is Miki doing here? If she was planning to lie about the depth of the relationship and intentionally sink his lingering strings to Lilly, why would she record it? Even if she does think it's for his own good there's no reason to let him hear that. On top of that, why does she then not immediately drop what she's doing and try to let him down easy instead of tossing him to the wolves like that? That's not love, girl.

Miki could've handled the whole thing better, in my opinion. She most likely recorded the conversation so Hisao could hear what Lilly really thinks/feels of not only him, but him and Miki being together without it sounding like a lie. It may have been preferable for her to have kept Hisao's phone until she was ready to confront him with the content of the recording, so she could lead Hisao into it better. Miki's seemingly constant smug/arrogant attitude (or way of talking, at least) wouldn't help much, though. One option could've been for Miki to place the call to Lilly for Hisao and hand him the phone while standing there to make sure that things get said.

Story-wise, I really didn't like the thought of Hisao hitting anyone, no matter the reason. Just the feeling I get of Hisao's personality during the Lilly route. Would've been a fitting moment to, instead, have Hisao suffer an extreme heart attack, putting him back in the hospital for a moderate period of time.



If the bulk of this really happened IRL, damn. Just... damn.

[Doomish]

Forget it.

[Bagheera]

Either she doesn't have the slightest idea what she wants (entirely possible) or she's making all this up as a defense mechanism because of Miki's utterly tactless approach.

I think it's the former. That sort of shit happens all the time, sadly.

And then again, what is Miki doing here? If she was planning to lie about the depth of the relationship and intentionally sink his lingering strings to Lilly, why would she record it? Even if she does think it's for his own good there's no reason to let him hear that. On top of that, why does she then not immediately drop what she's doing and try to let him down easy instead of tossing him to the wolves like that? That's not love, girl.

I don't think she had a coherent plan when she did it, and she was probably high when he called. He yells at her, she says "fine, do whatever you want, shithead," she regrets it and comes over to try to mitigate the damage.

Good story Doomish, but if it really is taken from personal experience . . . that girl? The one represented by Miki? Yeah, you should talk to her. I'm not sure she should talk to you--slapping a girl is never acceptable behavior, bro--but if you can get her to listen it'd be a good idea to try to make amends even if nothing else comes of it. Good luck.

Edit: Oh. Personal experience, not necessarily all at the same time or in that order. In that case . . . never mind, I guess?

[nemz]

Okay... read it again, and it all makes terrible sense now. Lilly does still love him, and even though she met some great guy she could potentially fall for just as hard she still isn't over Hisao yet. She's lonely and has that HASD to deal with, so Akira is setting her up with random dudes, but they don't satisfy because it's just sex, not love. She hates herself for cheating, hates herself for not getting over him yet, and hates him for making her feel this way. Ultimately she's just spreading it around while Hisao is concentrating his relief on one person, but it wouldn't surprise me if he's actually had more indiscretions total.

Miki fucked up, big time. If she'd just let it alone eventually Hisao would have cut things off in a much more civil fashion and returned her feelings in time.

This is a great short fic. The raw honesty you put into this shines through, Doomish. Here's hoping it helped work out your mood in a cathartic manner.

[Bagheera]

Miki fucked up, big time. If she'd just let it alone eventually Hisao would have cut things off in a much more civil fashion and returned her feelings in time.

Possibly. It's also possible he'd have dithered forever and grown to hate everyone involved just as Lilly did, leading to much the same spot everyone's in now. As I see it things with Miki are still salvageable provided she's willing to forgive the violence (she probably would) and he's able to cool off. Yeah, calling Lilly was a dick move, but Hisao's not exactly in a position to be throwing stones, y'know? And she's got a point -- I can see why she might get tired of being used by someone who's done with his previous relationship but can't muster up the stones to cut the damn cord.

But I can't help being an optimist when it comes to these sorts of things so there's that too.

(though I'm still wondering why Lilly and Hisao were even in a relationship at this point given that this is a continuation of the neutral end -- they'd pretty much broken up by that point anyway, and this is months later? Me is confuzzled, but whatevah.)

[nemz]

Nah, no way that's fixable now. Miki is too entangled in the whole mess for him to deal with it now even if he does get over Lilly and she forgives him for the slap. It's all become just one big goridian knot of a problem to be dealt with abruptly.

[DanjaDoom]

Yay, another Doomish stor-

*reads*

D:

[Mirage_GSM]

Writing about personal experiences in fanfictions can be a cathartic experience. I hope it helps you as much as it helped me.