Page 1 of 11

Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 12:45 am
by slagman5
Ok, I am just curious. I'm mainly interested in your opinion if you favored Rin's path, because I think if you didn't, the answer would probably be no to both. But if you actually were captivated by Rin's path like I was, think about in real life, if all of the factors of your relationship was the same, but you're you, no heart problem, no disability school, just that you met a girl that obviously has some really deep emotional and psychological issues like Rin, but she's in love with you and doesn't want to be alone any more. Would you really be able to "put up" with it? I don't want to sound mean, and it's not meant to be, but it's honestly really hard. Even a "perfect" relationship would have some tough moments. Imagine someone like Rin.

Me personally, I would REALLY REALLY hope that I would be up for it, and if she was actually as unique and sweet as Rin (before you argue, yes she is. When you first met within the first week, she gives you a hug because she thought you looked sad. And she trusted you, again, someone she's only known for a few days, enough to fall asleep innocently with. She's definitely a sweet girl in my opinion, just finds it hard to express it properly) and she has shown me that she has feelings for me (Hisao doesn't notice a lot of the things that Rin did especially for him that she didn't do with any others, not even her friend Emi that's known her much longer, and Hisao didn't appreciate it, which is why I always considered him a huge douche in her path...) I would definitely at least try and I think I'm really good at empathizing with her, meaning I won't judge her actions or words based on my own standards, but based on what I know it must mean for her to say or do them...

What about you guys? Would you be willing to give a serious relationship a go? Or would you be too afraid of her mental instability and don't think you'd be able to deal with the extra work and frustration that you'd be bound to encounter in a relationship with her?

And to clarify, the main reason why I pick Rin is because I honestly feel she is the most emotionally scarred. Many people would think it is Hanako, but I disagree. Her issues stem from a physical condition. I honestly believe that even without Hisao's involvement, when she moves on from High School and is surrounded by more mature people, she could very well move beyond her insecurities as she is more accepted. Lilly is fairly mentally stable to begin with, Emi has a tragic back story, but she has proven that she's a strong individual and could do fine on her own. And I'm sure with enough time with her, she will let down her armor eventually without too much drama. I feel it had more drama in the story since Hisao was with her for such a short period of time. So some more drastic things had to happen for her to let down her armor in that time period. Shizune, again, pretty mentally stable, and I would actually say that the runner up to the most mentally scarred is Misha with her blatant suicidal thoughts... And we all know how dangerous someone is if they hide their sadness with laughter. Nobody helps them and they end up going through it alone. At least with Hanako, her sadness was apparent and that caused others around her, such as Lilly, to help her. Rin is in the same boat as Misha, she kind of hides her sadness with non-expression. And I know some of her "aloof" personality is a conscious lie, since when she's really upset, all of a sudden her dialogue and vocabulary becomes very lucid and intelligible. If you play through her route again you'll see what I mean. She has these moments of clarity when she's really upset, which shows to me that some of the way she is the rest of the time is an act to hide her insecurities and her depression.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 12:58 am
by Khalego
slagman5 wrote:some of the way she is the rest of the time is an act to hide her insecurities and her depression.
Why would she hide her insecurities by behaving in a way that causes everyone to misunderstand and/or get pissed off at her? That's silly.

I'd probably yell at her a lot...

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:00 am
by SpunkySix
To be honest, even as somebody who sees Rin as fitting squarely in the "just a really great friend" category, I have a hard time seeing why people find it so hard to "put up with" RIn. She has some serious instabilities, sure, but nothing so bad that the good would be outweighed by it if you're truly in love with her, or even just friends with her. Her qualities are so worth the rough patches to me.

As for her being hard to understand... to me, she isn't. She definitely has a tough time phrasing things, but most of the time I get what she's saying anyways, and I'm more confused by why Hisao doesn't. It's like he's not even trying half the time.

So yes, in the end, I could definitely see Rin being somebody who would make a very loving long-time partner with the right person. I wouldn't be that person because I'm not into her like that, but as a friend, I would be hopeful that she found that person, because she deserves to be with somebody like that.
I'd probably yell at her a lot...
Well, you're not that person then. :|

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:12 am
by Zykes
I think it's easy to talk about dealing with the mental and emotional aspects of a person (in this case Rin) These kind of scenarios aren't exactly uncommon(people have troubles, insecurity, doubts, aloofness and so on.) But those can, with the right person and focus, be overcome.

But to fully take Rin as a person, you also have to include the physical. I think for the average person, who would not see people with missing limbs or scaring or such on a normal basis, wouldn't react completely with tact. In fact it is a huge barrier to pass (because people tend to notice and focus more on the physical.)

People would have to grow accustomed to the sight, the image in their mind before they could move forward onto the emotional and mental aspects of a person like Rin. (And I can imagine it is a very small percent of people.)

I will say that Rin isn't on the top of my list, but she was the most interesting one to read, and definitely one of the top ones to invest my understanding in. (Though I could never do her justice in my writing, for example.) The idea of a person like her is interesting to get to know, but personally I don't know how I would mentally get past the physical barrier in my mind.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:15 am
by SpunkySix
Zykes wrote:The idea of a person like her is interesting to get to know, but personally I don't know how I would mentally get past the physical barrier in my mind.
I feel like the key there is to think of it like she does. As in, almost a non-issue. Surprising at first maybe, but not especially notable seeing as she can do pretty much everything anybody else can do on a daily basis. Might need some slight help here and there, but who doesn't?

Like, okay... she doesn't have arms. Cool, whatever. Let's talk about life while you paint now.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:18 am
by Zykes
SpunkySix wrote:
Zykes wrote:The idea of a person like her is interesting to get to know, but personally I don't know how I would mentally get past the physical barrier in my mind.
I feel like the key there is to think of it like she does. As in, almost a non-issue. Surprising at first maybe, but not especially notable seeing as she can do pretty much everything anybody else can do on a daily basis. Might need some slight help here and there, but who doesn't?

Like, okay... she doesn't have arms. Cool, whatever. Let's talk about life while you paint now.
Easy in theory, not so much in practice. (Of course I am speaking from a real life point of view, rather then looking at it like as if from the VN)

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:19 am
by brythain
I'm quite confident of my ability to find a mental coping mechanism for talking to Rin, for dealing with her communication world, so to speak. What I'm really not confident about is my ability to handle her physical world. It would take time and lots of consideration.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:25 am
by Khalego
I could handle the physical part. I just lack patience for...You know, the rest. The obtuseness and insistent distance.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:27 am
by SpunkySix
Zykes wrote:
SpunkySix wrote:
Zykes wrote:The idea of a person like her is interesting to get to know, but personally I don't know how I would mentally get past the physical barrier in my mind.
I feel like the key there is to think of it like she does. As in, almost a non-issue. Surprising at first maybe, but not especially notable seeing as she can do pretty much everything anybody else can do on a daily basis. Might need some slight help here and there, but who doesn't?

Like, okay... she doesn't have arms. Cool, whatever. Let's talk about life while you paint now.
Easy in theory, not so much in practice. (Of course I am speaking from a real life point of view, rather then looking at it like as if from the VN)
Maybe, I guess it just depends on personal experience. I mean, I've seen people with disabilities in real life and had pretty normal conversations with them without ever talking about their handicap or even focusing on it in my head, so I figure that somebody with no arms wouldn't be that much different than, say, somebody in a wheel chair with no legs. Heck, I talked to a guy with no limbs period once. He was pretty cool, and even gave me a hug.

I think another thing that helps is that I kind of like having my own personal space and staying a little distant, so Rin being so spacey and distant would be okay in my book.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:33 am
by KeiichiO
Sure, why not? I've put up with worse anyways.

Maybe it's been awhile, but I never really thought Rin was that much of a pain. I was annoyed with Hisao more than I ever was with Rin. Plus, her 'strange' behavior really isn't that strange to me, as I find myself acting a lot like her in certain situations. I'm not sure if that's a good thing...

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 3:19 am
by Blanc
If I could make her happy, then I would. To be honest, I found Rin quite ideal. While she's bad at her words (though, I think I understood her), she does things what she thinks is right. It's quite fascinating that her happiness lies on being a social deviant after everything. Regarding physical things, I don't think she's much of a problem since she's that kind that only wants enough.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 5:48 am
by bhtooefr
Really, it's the whole space cadet thing that would make me utterly unable to deal with Rin, not the physical issues. Adding arms, I still would be unable to deal with her.

However, I would find the physical part a bit weird. If I could acclimate to that, I could probably deal with those issues, but not with Rin.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 10:22 am
by Megumeru
Long term relationship with Rin?

Hmm...
would be interesting, again it depends on whether or not you (or Hisao) can handle Rin's eccentric quirky-ness and randomness that floats around her as she seeks for more self-discovery.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 10:40 am
by Mirage_GSM
I don't really mind the quirkyness, and her moods aren't worse than what I'd expect from the majority of relationships...

I probably would give it a try if she confessed, but a girl like Rin almost certainly wouldn't do that in the first place.

Re: Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2014 12:00 pm
by slagman5
Hey, thank you guys for your honest replies. I might be kind of exaggerating how much of a big deal it is to "deal" with her mental state mainly so people who might not want to have to deal with it won't feel insulted. I do understand if you won't. Me personally, I'm ok with it and feel I'm empathetic enough to not have enough of an issue with it that it would prevent me from pursuing a relationship with such a person. Regarding her physical appearance, I honestly would not have a problem with someone who is missing a limb, or two in this case...

Please, keep the opinions coming. I'm interested in hearing everyone's take on this. :-)

Edit: Oh, and yes, I agree 100% that I got more annoyed by Hisao not understanding her than anything she said. I actually find her ramblings and her odd thoughts and reactions (like the shrugging) kind of endearing. And if I knew her in real life I would simply refer to those things as Rinisms and they would be among the things I like about her...