Where The Blame Falls. (OC. Upd. 07-10-15)

[LorSquirrel]

Table of Content.

In continuity posts.

Prologue. (This post.)

Chapter 1.

Chapter 2

Chapter 3
Out of continuity chapters.

Chapter 1-1

Chapter 1-2.

Chapter 1-3.

------------------------------------------------------------


Okay,I was working on the second scene for one of my other Fan Fics when I got the Idea for this one. I've been working on it for awhile and I'm posting the prologue here while I work on the rest of it.


Anyway...



Where The Blame Falls.




Prologue.


This is booooring.


All I’ve been doing for the past three hours is drawing in my coloring book, and now I’m out of pages to color, I’ve looked at the clouds in the sky for so long that I’ve probably see every cloud shape ever, and no one wants to play twenty questions! It doesn’t help that I’m stuck in the car so I can’t even get up and move around


“Mommy.” I say to the front passenger seat of the car. “When are we going to get there?”


She sighs and looks back at me, and I notice that a lock of her dark brown hair is slightly covering her pretty eyes. They’re red; like that crystal thingy daddy got her for her birthday last year.


“Kairi,” she begins in her usual soft tone, “You’ve asked me that twelve times in the past thirty minutes, and every time you ask, I give the same answer, so I’ll give it again. I don’t know yet honey.”


“Would the answer change if I asked a…” what comes after twelve again?


“No. It would not change if you asked a thirteenth time.” Oh right, it’s thirteen.


“Why not?” I ask as I lean back in my seat.


She sighs again. She looks kind of tired, “Because it doesn’t work that way honey.” She states turning back to look out her window.


“Why doesn’t it work that way?” I ask.


“Shut up Kairi.” Yuki says from the other side of the backseat.


“Don’t tell me what to do Yuki!” I yell at him.


“You have to listen to what I say, you little brat!” He yells back at me.


What a jerk!


“No I don’t!” I yell back.


“Yes you do!” He yells back to me.


“Why?” I ask him.


“Because I’m fifteen and you’re only six.” He says pushing up his glasses back in place with a smug grin.


“How does that make any sense!?” I yell as I hear mommy and daddy sigh at the same time.


“Because I’m the older sibling you idiot!” He yells back at me.


“I’m not an idiot you jerk!” I yell picking up my coloring book and throwing it at him.


It hits him right in-between the eyes. “Ha bulls eye!”


“You little!” He yells at me as he reaches over to my seat, grabs my hair, and pulls me over to his side.


“Hey let go of my hair you jerk! That hurts!” I scream, which get the attention of both mommy and daddy as they both look back and glare at Yuki as daddy pulls the car over to the side of the road.


“Heh…” he says letting go of my hair.


“Yuki…” daddy says in an angry tone.


“Y-yes sir?” Yuki replies to him.


“Why did you grab you’re sisters hair?” Daddy asks.


“Only because she threw her coloring books at me!” Yuki replies frantically, picking the book off the floor and showing it to him.


Daddy turns to look at me. “Is that true Kairi?”


“Well yeah… but he called me an idiot!” I reply.


“That doesn’t make throwing the book right,” Daddy replies. “If he says things like that mommy and I will deal with him, you aren’t allowed to throw things at him.”


“Yes sir…” I reply crossing my arms and looking out the left backseat window.


“Good. We’ll talk about this more when we get from uncle Haichi’s house,” daddy says pulling the car back onto the road.


After a few second the car starts coming up on an intersection, there’s a big blue truck coming from the left, and a white van coming from the right. I bring this up because in the few seconds it took us to get this far, I’ve already become bored again.


“Kairi, why didn’t you buckle your seatbelt?” Yuki asks in a bored tone.


“What?” I reply as we get closer to the intersection.


“You aren’t buckled,” he says pointing to the seatbelt.


“I guess I forgot.” I reply.


“Wow, you really are an idiot!” He says flicking the side of my head.



“Shut up you jerk!” I yell at him.


Mommy and daddy both look back at us; “Would you two just give it a r-” daddy is cut off when mommy yells. “Kyo look out!”


Not even a second after; the car hits something, and then everything goes dark.


…


I feel something shaking me, and a voice.


I think it’s saying something; I think it’s saying to wake up.


…


I feel myself starting to wake up and I hear the voice from before say something, “Shin, she’s waking up!” It sounds like a girl’s voice.


I slowly open my eyes, or at least I thought I did. Everything is still dark. I can feel something warm against my skin, and I think I’m lying on a road.


“Hey, Kairi right, are you okay?” The voice asks frantically.


I open my eyes again but everything is still dark so I rub them with my hands thinking that maybe that will help. Everything is still dark.


I start feeling around where I’m laying, to the right there’s just more of the road, to the left I can feel a bunch of rocks and then some grass.


“Hey! Answer me!” The voice asks just as frantically as before.


“Why is it so dark?” I ask picking up one of the rocks and feeling the edges of it.


“What?” The voice asks.


“Everything is dark, is it night time?” I start feeling some pain on different parts of my face, when I reach up to touch where it hurts I feel something wet.


The voice is quiet for a second, “Oh crap! Um… tell me how many finger I’m holding up!” The voice replies in a panicked tone.


I rub my eyes again but I still don’t see anything, “I don’t see anything, everything is just dark,” I notice a pain in the back of my head, and the fact that I don’t hear my mom or dad. “What happened?”


“Oh god, shin she can’t see anything!” I think someone replied to the voice, but I can’t hear it. Everything sounds like it’s fading away.


What’s going on?


-----------


Hope you guys enjoyed. Please leave me you're comments and criticism's below.

[masterchiefr75]

Good so far. Looking forward to more.

[TheCatBeyondSpace!]

Needs more cats!!! But seriously interesting start, it will be interesting to see how you handle a character like this. (On a side note, did you get her character name from the girl in kingdom hearts?)

[Kabuto90]

Interesting and somewhat unique start. Looking forward to more.

[Mirage_GSM]

Intersting, yes.
So it looks like you're going to intoduce another member of Lilly's class.
It might have been interesting to see the enrollment ceremony for new students - most OC stories use exchange students, so this would have been a chance to show something differen - but since you wrote "twelve years later" it seems you're going to jump straight to her third year at Yamaku.

[LorSquirrel]

Needs more cats!!!

Personally I think A giant talking squirrel would make a great comedic foil, but I guess everyone has they're own opinion on the matter...

(On a side note, did you get her character name from the girl in kingdom hearts?)

No, I just found it when I was searching Japanese names, although I have actually played kingdom hearts 1 and beaten kingdom hearts 2.

So it looks like you're going to intoduce another member of Lilly's class.

*Hands internet cookie*

It might have been interesting to see the enrollment ceremony for new students - most OC stories use exchange students, so this would have been a chance to show something different - but since you wrote "twelve years later" it seems you're going to jump straight to her third year at Yamaku.

Yeah, I wanted to do something like that, but with a character like Kairi it would be pretty hard to 'see' the ceremony.

[TheCatBeyondSpace!]

Needs more cats!!!

Personally I think A giant talking squirrel would make a great comedic foil, but I guess everyone has they're own opinion on the matter...

...Infidel!

It might have been interesting to see the enrollment ceremony for new students - most OC stories use exchange students, so this would have been a chance to show something different - but since you wrote "twelve years later" it seems you're going to jump straight to her third year at Yamaku.

Yeah, I wanted to do something like that, but with a character like Kairi it would be pretty hard to 'see' the ceremony.

I 'see' what you did there.


Anyway, I noticed that you have some other fan fictions on the forums, do they all share continuity, or are they all separate from eachother?

[LorSquirrel]

Yeah, I wanted to do something like that, but with a character like Kairi it would be pretty hard to 'see' the ceremony.

I 'see' what you did there.

Anyway, I noticed that you have some other fan fictions on the forums, do they all share continuity, or are they all separate from eachother?

The ones already on the forums? Yes, they are in continuity with eachother. I'm also planning on some experimental one-shots to see what else everyone would like to see.

[LorSquirrel]

Welp, been working on this, and the third scene for a painful past, and this got done first so enjoy and leave your thoughts below


Chapter 1-1: Twelve Years Later.

Twelve years ago… well it won't official be twelve years for another month, and a half, but still... twelve years.

…

I wonder if I should try calling Kyo and Yuki this year…

Wow that's one of the dumbest ideas I've had in awhile, they'd hang up the second they heard my voice. Just like they have the every time I've tried calling them for the past ten years...

"Miss Saito." I'm jolted out of my train of thought by a gruff voice. It sounds like it's coming from the front of the class room so it's probably the teacher, but I can't really remember who was teaching before I zoned out.

"U-um… yes?" I reply to the voice.

"You do realize classes are over, correct?" The gruff voice responds with a sigh. I think it's the English teacher, Mister Suzuki, or "Mister Baldo of Baldimore," as Miki likes to call him.

Wait did he say classes are over?

"What?" I respond in a confused tone.

Another sigh from Mister Suzuki." classes ended ten minutes ago and everyone other than you has left. I just wanted to make sure you are going to leave at some point. I have papers to grade and the sound of you mumbling to yourself is distracting."

"Oh, sorry, Suzuki, I'll get going," I respond.

I reach down to where I left my backpack, I feel around the outside of it until I feel my hand slide over the cold metal handle on my cane, I then proceed to take it out feel around it until I find and press the button that causes it to extend, and then slip my hand through the wrist band attached to the handle. I reach back down again to grab one of the straps on my backpack, and then sling it over my shoulder.

It doesn't take long for me to feel my way around the other desks in the class room and reach the door. I open it with my free hand, and step into the hallway, "Try not to fall down the stairs again, Miss Saito," Mister Suzuki says in a disinterested tone as I step out of the class room.

I don't even bother responding to him, I just close the door to the class room, and walk down the hallway.

He said classes have been over for ten minutes right? Strange, the hallway sounds pretty empty for this soon after classes; it usually takes twenty or so minute for it to get this quiet… Eh, whatever, I think I'll just go back to the dorms give that toy to Molly, listen to some music, and then go to bed.

I start tapping my cane on the ground in little arcs moving from left to right so I don't run into anything or trip and fall from something someone might have left lying around.

As I continue walking I suddenly feel the warmth of sunlight against the entire right side of my body. I stop and take in the feeling. I've always liked the way the sunlight feels against my skin even before the accident, the way it warms my body the second I step into the rays, even through my school uniform, feels so nice.

…

After awhile of standing in the middle of the hallway, taking in the warmth from the sunlight, I guess a cloud drifted in front of the sun, because the feeling of warmth quickly starts to subside, eventually leaving completely.

I let out a disappointed sigh, "Well, it was good while it lasted," I say to myself as I continue walking to where the stairs are.

Actually since there doesn't seem to be anyone else around maybe I could use the elevator like I did last week. Hmm… on second thought I kind of lost my sense of direction when I used it last, and non of the numbers on the buttons are in brail, so I guess I'm stuck with the stairs.

It doesn't take long for me to reach the stairs, and when I do, I retract my cane, put it back in the outside pocket of my backpack, grab the railing leading down the stairs, and start taking slow careful steps so I don't fall.

As I slowly make my way down the stairs, I start counting every step, I started doing this the first year I came here, I was bored and I didn't have any friends, and slowly walking up and down the stairs always seemed to take forever, so I started counting the number of steps for ever set of stairs I came across, it helps make it seem like its go faster. I also discovered that the number of stairs from the first floor to the third is one hundred twelve.

After about two minutes I finally reach the first floor, so I get my cane back out and continue to the front doors of the school.

As I walk through the hallway the only sounds I hear are some distant muffled voices that sound like they're coming from the cafeteria, and the rhythmic tapping of my cane against the tiled floor. It's actually pretty relaxing, especially considering how noisy it usually is at this time of day. It's a nice change of pace.

My cane hits against something metal. I reach to feel what I've hit, and I feel the cold metal frame of the school's main entrance. I push it open and am greeted by a gentle breeze, and the scent of flowers coming from the school's garden.

I'm about to step outside before I hear a very loud noise.

CLANK CLANK CLANK!

Hmm… If my intuition is right, which it usually is? Then that's the sound of…

"Hello Kairi," The always lazy sounding voice belonging to my friend Molly, says the second the clanking stops.

"If you keep running like that those prosthetics are going to break again," I say as I raise my hand, and waggle a finger in mock disappointment in the direction of Molly's voice.

I hear a quiet shuffling noise coming from Molly's direction which usually indicates that she just shrugged.

"Eh. If that happens again I'll just have you carry me to the nurse's office again," She replies a small amount of playfulness coming through her lazy tone.

"Once you lose a couple pounds maybe. It felt like my arms were going to fall off you were so heavy," I say sarcastically as I rub my arm as if it were sore.

"Hey! I can't be much heavier than that backpack of yours! I swear it's like you have an elephant in there!" She says the sarcasm in her voice perfectly matching mine.

I have an idea.

"How did you know I have an elephant in here?" I reply with a confused tone while trying to keep a straight face.

"Wait, you actually have an elephant in there?" Molly replies in an amused tone.

"Sure do! Want to see?" I ask with a grin.

"But of course miss Saito!" Molly replies bombastically.

"Okay," I reply as I take off my backpack, and lay it on the ground in-front of me. "Stand in-front of me,"

"Sure," Molly replies cheerfully.

I hear her move in-front of me, but I reach out and feel around for her blouse just to make sure.

I kneel down, and start unzipping the main pocket, "By the way. Close your eyes."

"What?"

"Just do it."

"Why?

"Because other wise I'm not showing you the elephant!"

"Okay, okay. There closed now."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I'm sure.

"Pinky swear?" I bring up my hand closest to her, and raise my pinky finger.

"Pinky swear," she replies wrapping her pinky around mine.

"Ha! Gotcha!"

"Darn it!"

"Seriously close them now."

"Okay. They are sealed shut now."

"Good."

I finish unzipping the main pocket, and immediately feel a small plushy elephant trunk bump against me hand.

I pick it up, and hold it out towards where I remember Molly being.

"Eye's still shut?"

"Yup!"

" Someone's getting excited! "

"Oh. Stop singing and let me open my eyes!"

"Okay. On the count of three open your eyes."

"Got it!"

"One… Two…." I let out a fake cough just before saying three to mess with her.

"Hey!"

"Had something in my throat, anyway. One… two…. three! Open your eyes!"

Molly gives a little gasp, and snatches the toy elephant out of my hand.

"This is adorable!" She shouts so loud I'm pretty sure the people in the cafeteria heard us.

"So you like it then?" I ask picking up my backpack back up.

She gives me a pretty big bear hug during which I notice that she's wearing raspberry perfume.

"Are you kidding me?" she joyfully says as she puts me down. "If we were dating I would so kiss you right now! You know… if I did that kind stuff with girls,,,"

"Okay then… anyway what are you doing for your birthday?" I ask with a chuckle.

"Why are you asking about my birthday? It isn't for like three weeks." She says in a confused tone.

Seriously Again?

"Molly. What day do you think it is today?" I ask patiently tapping my foot.

"Thursday, Duh," She replies.

"I mean what do you think the date is today?"

"The fourth,"

I sigh, "Today is the thirty-first. YOUR birthday genius!"

"Really? Why didn't you guys tell me?"

Honestly I don't know why Miki, Suzu, Ikuno, Kyoko, or I thought that that she would remember this year. I guess we thought it was impossible to forget your own birthday three years in a row, but somehow Molly manages it.

"We figured you would actually remember this year, that's why!" I say tapping my cane against what I think is her prosthetics judging by the "Twang" sound I just heard.

"Well what gave you guys that idea?" She asks.

"I honestly don't know… anyway. You want to get something at the Shanghai? I think they still do the thing where you get a free slice of cake for your birthday," I ask with a sigh.

"Actually I was thinking of the Chinese diner, they let you get any of the desserts on the menu free of charge no matter what, or how big!" She replies cheerfully again.

"Sure. You want to invite some people?" I ask picking my backpack up and putting my arm through one of the straps.

"Yeah! Let's invite Miki, Suzu, Ikuno, Kyoko, Hayato, and… let's also invite that Akito guy that Miki's dating," She says the last part with a chuckle.

"They aren't dating, dork. She just showed him around town," I explain.

"I know, but I just like annoying her with it," She replies with another chuckle.

"According to her the only ones you're annoying are Kyoko, and Akito." I reply in a disapproving tone.

"Okay I think I saw Kyoko, Hayato, and Suzu in the cafeteria, but where would Miki, Ikuno, and Akito be…?" And she's ignoring me now. I don't know anyone else who can go from full on conversation to ignoring the person they're having the conversation with like Molly does.

"They're probably in the room for that detectives club that Ikuno's in,"

"You know the way there?"

"Yeah wh-"

"Okay I'll go get Kyoko, Suzu, and Hayato from the cafeteria. While you go get Miki, Ikuno, and Akito from the detectives club room, and we'll meet back here in twenty minutes. Okay? Great! See you in twenty minutes!" I don't even get to respond before I here the clank, clank, clanking running towards the cafeteria.

Okay time to head to the detectives club.


Whoa! I almost had two thousand words this time!





...Shizune is a mean panda...

[Mirage_GSM]

I wonder if I should try calling Kyo and Yuki this year… Wow that’s one of the dumbest ideas I’ve had in awhile, they’d hang up the second they heard my voice. Just like they have the every time I’ve tried calling them for the past ten years...

Kyo is her father, right? Ten years ago she was about eight years old... An eight year old girl did something that would make her father shun her for such a long time? Some kind of father he is...

“Oh, sorry, Suzuki, I’ll get going,” I respond.

She should probably call him "Mr. Suzuki."

After awhile of standing ...

Missing a blank here.

and I might get in trouble if I’m seen again

Why should she get in trouble for using the elevator? The elevators are there to help the students who have problems with stairs, aren't they?

I also discovered that the number of stairs from the first floor to the third is one hundred ninety-four.

More than 60 steps between two floors? How high are those ceilings?

a specially considering how noisy it usually is at this time of day.

"especially"

I didn’t have any friends (still don’t have any)
...
The always lazy sounding voice belonging to my friend Molly...
Honestly I don’t know why Miki, Suzu, Ikuno, Kyoko, or I thought...

Seems she has a lot of friends now...

as I take off my backpack, and lay on the ground in-front of me

lay "it" ?

With all that out of the way...
Well, lots of reasonably fresh, little used characters and a few OCs that show no signs of being Mary Sues so far.
Looking very good so far.

[LorSquirrel]

Oh god. I could have sworn a fixed all of that before posting last night. Thanks for the heads up mirage. *Opens up Microsoft word and starts working*


As for these...

“Oh, sorry, Suzuki, I’ll get going,” I respond.

She should probably call him "Mr. Suzuki."

That's just the way she chooses to address her teachers.

I wonder if I should try calling Kyo and Yuki this year… Wow that’s one of the dumbest ideas I’ve had in awhile, they’d hang up the second they heard my voice. Just like they have the every time I’ve tried calling them for the past ten years...

Kyo is her father, right? Ten years ago she was about eight years old... An eight year old girl did something that would make her father shun her for such a long time? Some kind of father he is...

Oh. If only you knew what was to come..... *Evil chuckle that soon turns into a full on maniacal laugh.*

[Mirage_GSM]

That's just the way she chooses to address her teachers.

But... That's incredibly rude!

Well, at least now I know how she managed to alienate her father that much

[Steinherz]

That's just the way she chooses to address her teachers.

But... That's incredibly rude!

Well, at least now I know how she managed to alienate her father that much

Or perhaps it's just her own personal quirk? Being a bit more casual than normal?

[LorSquirrel]

That's how it was intended.

[Mirage_GSM]

Well, I'm not sure about Squirreltopia, but where I come from, if we had called our teacher "Smith" (or the German equivalent name) that would have caused an immediate reprimand.
I didn't go to school in the US, but I ssume the reaction there would have been similar.
In Japan, the going custom is to append a honorific to the name of even classmates. Adressing a teacher without honorific is unthinkableexcept for the worst delinquents. Your character doesn't seem to be a delinquent from what I've read so far, so it strikes me as odd.
If you don't have a very good reason for this and a very good reason for the teacher to let it slide in the story, I recommend you give her another "quirk."