Katawa Ball Z Kai condensed
Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2012 11:23 pm
This is what happens when you're sleep deprived and you've finally snapped because what you write is poorly received anyway;
One day, Iwanako flew to Yamaku, beat up the Nurse and challenged Hisao.
She reveals that they were all Saiyans, a proud fighting warrior race. From Space!
Iwanako also reveals that she is Hanako's little sister, whom Hanako never knew survived.
Iwanako takes Hanako hostage, forcing Hisao and the Nurse to man-up and go have a smack-down with Iwanako.
The Nurse accidentally kills Hisao, but manages to off Iwanako, but she reveals that two more godly-powered Saiyans are already coming for them.
The Nurse in turn "kidnaps" Hanako and embarks on a gruelling training regime with her. (He forced her to)
One Year Later, Hisao was wished back to life by the Katawa Dragon, when Emi came back from her Amazing Race World Tour, having gathered all 7 legendary Katawa Balls, as per The Nurse's instruction.
Hisao uses the second wish to grant him superb fighting skills, and the third wish to bring the two godly-powered Saiyans immediately to Yamaku. (instead of immortality)
Shizune and Misha are revealed to be the godly Saiyans.
Shizune and Misha start beating up everyone, The Nurse and Hanako came back to save Yamcha from getting killed, but despite The Nurse being incredibly stronger and Hanako having the ability to unleash bursts of immense power, Yamcha still dies.
Misha be Firin' her Laser and kills The Nurse. Hanako almost gets killed but Hisao saved her by blocking Misha's pink drill laser, and wasn't the least harmed by it.
Shizune's glasses are revealed to be scouters, and she uses them to analyse Hisao. Turns out Hisao's power level was over 69 thousand Raditz. And they were very sexy Raditzes.
Shizune tells Misha to back down, but Misha accidentally reveals she was betraying Shizune. Misha was a double agent working for Jigoro. Shizune almost kills Misha, but forgives her, letting her live.
Shizune and Hisao fly out to Yamaku's backyard Grand Canyon to have a final showdown. Which was always there in Japan.
Hisao starts his "Kenji-ken", going up to x2, and pushing himself to x3, finally putting himself on equal footing with Shizune's fighting skills.
But it wasn't enough, Hisao can't really defeat Shizune, so he uses his secret technique; The Kata-hame-wa energy attack, which launches a massive stream of energy at Shizune, but Shizune counters it with her own energy beam attack, but it doesn't stand up for long against Hisao's Kenji-ken x4 boost.
So Shizune gets launched into space.
And everyone lived happily ever after for about two seconds before Shizune fell back down to earth and continued beating everyone up. Some giant monkeys were involved.
Rin accidentally reveals about the Nursians home planet; Nursek. And Shizune immediately steals Mutou Jetson's space-pod and flies there to wish herself immortality. Since Earth's Katawa-Balls were rendered inert by The Nurse's death at Misha's hands (and pink drills).
Hisao and gang chases after her on Rin's magic carpet, but it takes a while, so he trains Lilly and Hanako and Emi en route in the ship, and does his best to resist thinking dirty thoughts and getting a heart flutter. (he's cramped on a tiny strip of carpet with sexy sweaty girls in sports bras)
They finally land on planet Nursek, and all the Nursians look a like.
The only horrifying thing is that Jigoro is there too, having heard Misha's loud voice declaring about Nursek's Katawa Balls from all the way in Saitama.
Jigoro too wants the Katawa Balls for immortality, and fights everyone for it. But since Jigoro is actually an alien, he transforms into a giant werewolf, then a demonic vampire, and finally a small big-headed thing with red lipstick. (yeah)
He kills Shizune, just as Shizune manages to use Nursek's bigger balls to wish The Nurse back to life. (she tried wishing Jigoro into the sun, but Jigoro was powerful enough to resist it, apparently)
Jigoro kills the Nurse too anyway. Forgetting that Earth's Katawa Balls will be rendered inert. Again.
Jigoro kills Emi. And that finally pushes Hisao to the limits.
So he goes Super Saiyan.
Jigoro was surprised and reveals how he blew up Planet Shizune, the Saiyans' home planet. Which is basically his own home world. Because he's That much of a jerk.
Super Saiyan Hisao starts fighting Jigoro, and their mutual dislike blows up the core of planet Nursek as they fight.
Rin sneakily uses the distraction to wish herself a magic hat, then to wish everyone not evil-hearted back to Earth.
http://shimmie.katawa-shoujo.com/post/view/2562
Everyone, all the Nurseks and their little dog was magically teleported to Earth. Only Jigoro was excepted, and Hisao too, since Hisao wanted to kill Jigoro for killing Emi. So they fight. Until the planet blows up and no one really wins.
Back on Earth, Rin uses her magic hat to pull a revived Shizune, a revived Nurse and a relieved Yamcha out from the spirit realm. But she put Yamcha back. Rin pulls a revived Emi back out instead and they hugged.
Using the Big Balls of Nursek's last third wish, they wish for Hisao back and alive. But Hisao was too powerful and refuses, saying that he can't come home just yet.
So they use the third wish to send all the Nursians to Planet New-Nurseks, where they all lived happily ever after.
Bam! Bionic-Jigoro came back to Earth and wanted to use the Katawa Balls, again. This remembering that if The Nurse dies, his balls will be rendered inert.
But then some other Super Saiyan dude came and banished Jigoro, by brandishing Jigoro's own giant sword and making mince meat out of his Cybertronic parts.
Hisao came back too, and reveals that he "learned how to think with Portals". So there was no real danger as he could have just tele-portaled and fought Jigoro off. (or so he says)
But they don't all live happily ever after, as the new Super Saiyan dude reveals that his name is Hikaru, the son of Hisao and Hanako.
Hisao nearly had a heart attack hearing it, but keeps his composure and listens carefully, as Hikaru reveals that Kenji has gone nuts and is building bionic fighting machines. Two of these bionics have utterly destroyed the future, and Hikaru came back to try and change the past.
Hisao and company immediately go to Kenji's dorm room, but they were too late, and Hikaru lost his keys to his time machine. So they all end up fighting Perfect Kenji.
Apparently, Hikaru came from an Alternate future, as Kenji had picked up Hikaru's keys when he dropped it fighting, and used it to screw up some parts of history (The French Military actually won some battles here and there) and steal future technology to make himself into a Perfect bionic.
Now it's everyone vs Perfect Kenji. But Perfect Kenji is too strong, and smacks the arrhythmia back into Hisao's chest, forcing everyone to pitch in and save Hisao, as Perfect Kenji goes on rampage destroying Gucci retail stores.
Hikaru reveals he has light powers (his effeminate name means 'light' or 'to shine'), and Hikaru monotonously chants "Dende" as he heals Hisao.
Hanako goes off on her own to stop Perfect Kenji, challenging him to a game of Chess, but that only made P-Kenji laugh. So she proposes that everyone challenges P-Kenji one on one, in a series of battles. If P-Kenji wins, they will all join his army, if P-Kenji loses, he stops blowing up fashion outlets. And people too. Because that's important.
P-Kenji accepts, and so they give it their all in their battles, Hisao jumped in the first turn to try and tele-portal P-Kenji into a black hole, but he failed.
Then it's Shizune's turn to go toe-to-toe with P-Kenji, but P-Kenji reveals his secret power; "OPTIC BLAST!"
http://shimmie.katawa-shoujo.com/post/view/2419/
Finally... only Hanako is left standing, and she nearly dies fighting off P-Kenji from killing Shizune, despite Hanako herself achieving Super Saiyan Level 2.
Sensing the imminent doom, Hisao tele-portals himself into P-Kenji, somehow fusing them together and tele-portals their mangled fusion into a black hole. Destroying both of them and ending the threat.
They don't all live happily ever after though, when P-Kenji teleportaled back, claiming that he's now Super Saiyan P-Kenji, even more powerful than before, and completely pissed off.
As a last ditch effort, Hanako and Lilly sacrifice their individualities and merge into a new being;
http://ern-cockworthington.deviantart.c ... -296147929
HanaLilly!
And she fights P-Kenji with all her might, fueled by grief and anger, and in a stroke of luck, when Hisao momentarily overpowers P-Kenji from within him, HanaLilly delivers the final blow. Ending the threat and restoring peace on earth.
The End.
One day, Iwanako flew to Yamaku, beat up the Nurse and challenged Hisao.
She reveals that they were all Saiyans, a proud fighting warrior race. From Space!
Iwanako also reveals that she is Hanako's little sister, whom Hanako never knew survived.
Iwanako takes Hanako hostage, forcing Hisao and the Nurse to man-up and go have a smack-down with Iwanako.
The Nurse accidentally kills Hisao, but manages to off Iwanako, but she reveals that two more godly-powered Saiyans are already coming for them.
The Nurse in turn "kidnaps" Hanako and embarks on a gruelling training regime with her. (He forced her to)
One Year Later, Hisao was wished back to life by the Katawa Dragon, when Emi came back from her Amazing Race World Tour, having gathered all 7 legendary Katawa Balls, as per The Nurse's instruction.
Hisao uses the second wish to grant him superb fighting skills, and the third wish to bring the two godly-powered Saiyans immediately to Yamaku. (instead of immortality)
Shizune and Misha are revealed to be the godly Saiyans.
Shizune and Misha start beating up everyone, The Nurse and Hanako came back to save Yamcha from getting killed, but despite The Nurse being incredibly stronger and Hanako having the ability to unleash bursts of immense power, Yamcha still dies.
Misha be Firin' her Laser and kills The Nurse. Hanako almost gets killed but Hisao saved her by blocking Misha's pink drill laser, and wasn't the least harmed by it.
Shizune's glasses are revealed to be scouters, and she uses them to analyse Hisao. Turns out Hisao's power level was over 69 thousand Raditz. And they were very sexy Raditzes.
Shizune tells Misha to back down, but Misha accidentally reveals she was betraying Shizune. Misha was a double agent working for Jigoro. Shizune almost kills Misha, but forgives her, letting her live.
Shizune and Hisao fly out to Yamaku's backyard Grand Canyon to have a final showdown. Which was always there in Japan.
Hisao starts his "Kenji-ken", going up to x2, and pushing himself to x3, finally putting himself on equal footing with Shizune's fighting skills.
But it wasn't enough, Hisao can't really defeat Shizune, so he uses his secret technique; The Kata-hame-wa energy attack, which launches a massive stream of energy at Shizune, but Shizune counters it with her own energy beam attack, but it doesn't stand up for long against Hisao's Kenji-ken x4 boost.
So Shizune gets launched into space.
And everyone lived happily ever after for about two seconds before Shizune fell back down to earth and continued beating everyone up. Some giant monkeys were involved.
Rin accidentally reveals about the Nursians home planet; Nursek. And Shizune immediately steals Mutou Jetson's space-pod and flies there to wish herself immortality. Since Earth's Katawa-Balls were rendered inert by The Nurse's death at Misha's hands (and pink drills).
Hisao and gang chases after her on Rin's magic carpet, but it takes a while, so he trains Lilly and Hanako and Emi en route in the ship, and does his best to resist thinking dirty thoughts and getting a heart flutter. (he's cramped on a tiny strip of carpet with sexy sweaty girls in sports bras)
They finally land on planet Nursek, and all the Nursians look a like.
The only horrifying thing is that Jigoro is there too, having heard Misha's loud voice declaring about Nursek's Katawa Balls from all the way in Saitama.
Jigoro too wants the Katawa Balls for immortality, and fights everyone for it. But since Jigoro is actually an alien, he transforms into a giant werewolf, then a demonic vampire, and finally a small big-headed thing with red lipstick. (yeah)
He kills Shizune, just as Shizune manages to use Nursek's bigger balls to wish The Nurse back to life. (she tried wishing Jigoro into the sun, but Jigoro was powerful enough to resist it, apparently)
Jigoro kills the Nurse too anyway. Forgetting that Earth's Katawa Balls will be rendered inert. Again.
Jigoro kills Emi. And that finally pushes Hisao to the limits.
So he goes Super Saiyan.
Jigoro was surprised and reveals how he blew up Planet Shizune, the Saiyans' home planet. Which is basically his own home world. Because he's That much of a jerk.
Super Saiyan Hisao starts fighting Jigoro, and their mutual dislike blows up the core of planet Nursek as they fight.
Rin sneakily uses the distraction to wish herself a magic hat, then to wish everyone not evil-hearted back to Earth.
http://shimmie.katawa-shoujo.com/post/view/2562
Everyone, all the Nurseks and their little dog was magically teleported to Earth. Only Jigoro was excepted, and Hisao too, since Hisao wanted to kill Jigoro for killing Emi. So they fight. Until the planet blows up and no one really wins.
Back on Earth, Rin uses her magic hat to pull a revived Shizune, a revived Nurse and a relieved Yamcha out from the spirit realm. But she put Yamcha back. Rin pulls a revived Emi back out instead and they hugged.
Using the Big Balls of Nursek's last third wish, they wish for Hisao back and alive. But Hisao was too powerful and refuses, saying that he can't come home just yet.
So they use the third wish to send all the Nursians to Planet New-Nurseks, where they all lived happily ever after.
Bam! Bionic-Jigoro came back to Earth and wanted to use the Katawa Balls, again. This remembering that if The Nurse dies, his balls will be rendered inert.
But then some other Super Saiyan dude came and banished Jigoro, by brandishing Jigoro's own giant sword and making mince meat out of his Cybertronic parts.
Hisao came back too, and reveals that he "learned how to think with Portals". So there was no real danger as he could have just tele-portaled and fought Jigoro off. (or so he says)
But they don't all live happily ever after, as the new Super Saiyan dude reveals that his name is Hikaru, the son of Hisao and Hanako.
Hisao nearly had a heart attack hearing it, but keeps his composure and listens carefully, as Hikaru reveals that Kenji has gone nuts and is building bionic fighting machines. Two of these bionics have utterly destroyed the future, and Hikaru came back to try and change the past.
Hisao and company immediately go to Kenji's dorm room, but they were too late, and Hikaru lost his keys to his time machine. So they all end up fighting Perfect Kenji.
Apparently, Hikaru came from an Alternate future, as Kenji had picked up Hikaru's keys when he dropped it fighting, and used it to screw up some parts of history (The French Military actually won some battles here and there) and steal future technology to make himself into a Perfect bionic.
Now it's everyone vs Perfect Kenji. But Perfect Kenji is too strong, and smacks the arrhythmia back into Hisao's chest, forcing everyone to pitch in and save Hisao, as Perfect Kenji goes on rampage destroying Gucci retail stores.
Hikaru reveals he has light powers (his effeminate name means 'light' or 'to shine'), and Hikaru monotonously chants "Dende" as he heals Hisao.
Hanako goes off on her own to stop Perfect Kenji, challenging him to a game of Chess, but that only made P-Kenji laugh. So she proposes that everyone challenges P-Kenji one on one, in a series of battles. If P-Kenji wins, they will all join his army, if P-Kenji loses, he stops blowing up fashion outlets. And people too. Because that's important.
P-Kenji accepts, and so they give it their all in their battles, Hisao jumped in the first turn to try and tele-portal P-Kenji into a black hole, but he failed.
Then it's Shizune's turn to go toe-to-toe with P-Kenji, but P-Kenji reveals his secret power; "OPTIC BLAST!"
http://shimmie.katawa-shoujo.com/post/view/2419/
Finally... only Hanako is left standing, and she nearly dies fighting off P-Kenji from killing Shizune, despite Hanako herself achieving Super Saiyan Level 2.
Sensing the imminent doom, Hisao tele-portals himself into P-Kenji, somehow fusing them together and tele-portals their mangled fusion into a black hole. Destroying both of them and ending the threat.
They don't all live happily ever after though, when P-Kenji teleportaled back, claiming that he's now Super Saiyan P-Kenji, even more powerful than before, and completely pissed off.
As a last ditch effort, Hanako and Lilly sacrifice their individualities and merge into a new being;
http://ern-cockworthington.deviantart.c ... -296147929
HanaLilly!
And she fights P-Kenji with all her might, fueled by grief and anger, and in a stroke of luck, when Hisao momentarily overpowers P-Kenji from within him, HanaLilly delivers the final blow. Ending the threat and restoring peace on earth.
The End.
