Kudos to whoever gets the wordplay in the title this time. It's more obscure than usual.
Storycodes: li mi shi nosex
QUEENS OF THE LAND
---
'Unfortunately, school regulations clearly require discussion by a joint committee formed by the student body and the administration staff, including the Principal, before non-private, student-promoted projects can be allowed. As Satou-san well knows, the principal is currently on sick leave, and the temporary substitute's privileges do not allow this level of decision-making.'
'Er... Hakamichi-san says...'
'So it is. Nevertheless, the event would enrich our school environment, and improve Yamaku Academy's public image considerably. It would be good for all of us, and I would gladly shoulder any outstanding costs. It would be shortsighted of Hakamichi-san to stand idle and let this opportunity slip.'
'...' *sign sign*
'I am not going to bend the rules to accommodate Satou-san's whims and let an involved student play patron, especially not over school-related matters. Procedure must be followed properly.'
'Shicchaaan~... um... Hakamichi-san says...'
'My, I understand. Mikado-san, please convey to Hakamichi-san my regrets over her chosen stance, and about the lack of progress in these talks, caused by her lack of flexibility.'
'Waaahh~...' *sign sign*
...This kind of dialogue has been going on for the better part of two hours now, with only minor variations from both parties. If I don't find a way to keep these two from each other's throats, it's going to kill me.
Lilly Satou has been pushing her proposal for a public classical music event through the layers of Yamaku's bureaucracy until she hit a rock: Shizune's dislike for her. As the leader of the student council, she can and did find ways to bog down the process in red tape and technicalities.
Therefore, these 'talks', requested by Satou. With me performing as a translator for them.
I assume she was thinking that she could smooth her way through with, well... a large enough bribe. Or, as she put it earlier, a 'generous donation'. I would be surprised if something like that wasn't what got her this far, this fast with convincing the school administration. That only shows exactly how much she doesn't understand Shizune's way of thinking. As long as we're spreading blame, though, Shizune is only doing this to spite her in the first place, which is really rather petty.
I'm not going to tell either of them, though. I'm way too young to die.
But still, I have to think of something. Being the go-between in this politely-worded, venom-laden, third-person exchange makes me feel like an overcharged fuse. And I don't wanna melt, thank you very much.
I sigh. Being in this unfamiliar room is not helping matters either. Since the student council room is currently closed off because of renovations ongoing at the Main Building, we have been granted use of this one near the Principal's office. The neutral ground is just making us all a little bit edgier, albeit for different reasons. And this song and dance number is making us run very late, it's been dark outside for a while already. I'm so tired~. Dealing with these two has been sooo exhausting...
...Uh oh, Shizune is glaring daggers at me. I let my attention wander, and must have missed her reply. Time for distraction tactics!
*koff* *koff* 'Ahem. I'm sorry, my throat has gone dry. I need to get something to drink, I'll just be gone a minute. Would either of you like something as well?'
I swear I just felt the temperature drop a few degrees. Damn me and my big mouth.
'...Okay, I'llberightbackthen. Excuse me~...'
Beating a hasty tactical retreat, I slip out of the oldfashioned, massive wooden door and carefully pick my way down the badly-lighted stairs. In no time at all, I'm getting a few coins out of my pocket and sending them clunking down the vending machine's mechanical innards.
I let out another long sigh, this time out of relief. Plopping down on the bench set up in a secluded corner near the vending machine and taking a swig out of the cool drink feels so much better.
***
The silence is thick enough to be cut with the proverbial knife. I am incensed, and would dearly love to fidget a little to physically relieve a bit of that irritation, but I can't. I'm not going to show any emotion in front of her. Which in turn, irritates me even more, creating a vicious circle.
I imagine Hakamichi sitting ramrod-straight in front of me, doing her best not to make the slightest noise for the exact same reasons I have. It would be funny, if she weren't so ridiculous - and not in an entertaining way.
That girl is such an impossibly naive, uncompromising idealist. So what if she has a little bit of control over the student body? She's being unreasonable and misusing that control for her own personal, wrong reasons. Here I'm trying to perform a service in the interest of the school's reputation, and what do I get from her? Technicalities and obstruction instead of gratitude, that's what. If nobody ever does anything for the school, it can't be helped if anybody doing something gets noticed. It's not as if I'm actively looking for acclaim...
Wait. What was that?
I cock my head in the direction of the exit, and frown. That noise sounded like... clanking? It didn't seem like something that should have been caused by Mikado. ...And she's been gone for a while, certainly time enough to get a drink and come back.
A quick check of my watch tells me it's really very late. Nobody should be around at this hour... well, not even us, but that's a different story. This requires investigation. I stand up abruptly, and start wending my way towards the exit.
***
I'm SO going to murder her. No tribunal would ever find me guilty. Who does she think she is? Of all the conceited, high-handed, harebrained schemes...
It's at times like this that I most resent my inability to utter sounds. I want to scream in frustration at the tall, golden girl sitting in front of me. Her attitude infuriates me beyond all reason. I'm relieved by the fact that she can't see me - if she could, I am sure she would have made a crack about my scowl and the risk of my face permanently setting that way.
Satou is evidently used to getting her way by charming or outright buying out all opposition. Well, bad luck for her this time. I can't be bought by the likes of her for any sum, and as for the charming - ICK. Everybody in Yamaku has heard THOSE stories, but not even I can believe she'd stoop that far.
...Anyway, that's neither here nor there. Yamaku doesn't need any grandstanding, pretentious display of wealth. She's going to flaunt herself over my own dead body. And speaking of newly-dead bodies, where has Misha sloped off to...?
...HEY! What the hell does she think she's doing?
After briefly looking displeased with something, Satou stands and tries to exit the room. More as a reaction than anything else, I jump up in turn and grab her by the arm, trying to prevent her from leaving our battleground.
She looks surprised and annoyed at my stopping her, shakes her head impatiently and says something, pointing towards the general direction of the door.
...Well I KNOW she wants to leave, but why... oh.
Still looking sour, she points at her ear then at the door. Crossly jerking her arm away from my grasp, she walks off. I follow her outside.
***
The corridor is quiet. The sound of my and Hakamichi's steps is muffled by the carpeting, giving me further reason to believe that the odd noise I heard was somehow out of place. I turn left, waving my cane in front of me. I've been up here enough times not to need following the wall for safety.
It takes very little time before I hear Hakamichi overtaking me and then some rattling sounds. Seconds later, my cane probes the obvious obstacle.
'Seems like someone locked this door...'
I say that aloud, even though I know it to be a doubly futile gesture. Once the rattling and expected pounding noises stop, I try the handle myself. I don't find it any less locked than Hakamichi did, but I am not going to miss checking for myself to make a point to her.
I sigh. This is going to be an annoyance. Probably an overzealous worker or janitor thought to close up things for the night, in order to prevent bored insomniacs from wandering around the areas under renovation and getting hurt.
Which would be admirably scrupulous, except we're now being prevented from leaving as well.
Giving up on this, I turn around smartly and go towards the opposite end of the corridor. This time I take more care. I know what's supposed to be there, but I have never actually gone this way...
I'm disappointed again by the clacking of my cane. Another door - yes, just as locked. This is... starting to get hairy.
The echo of quick steps from behind me announces the arrival of Hakamichi as well. I step aside to let her try for herself, and pat myself down to check.
Oh dear.
***
The corridor here is just as dimly-lit as its other end. Only what light filters from the room we were in, and a little from the outside, allows me to see Satou's shape. This isn't normal... even though it's late, the Main Building should be at least minimally lighted all over. Instead, every light switch I tried so far remained stubbornly unresponsive. The door here does not yield any more than the other one did, either.
Satou is frowning and saying something. Fat lot of good THAT is going to do.
She's holding out her hand, palm up.
I shrug. Right after doing it, I feel like kicking myself. Damn it, it's like I'm getting infected by her stupidity.
She sweeps quickly her arm in the air between us, making me jump a little bit. Looking even more annoyed, she points in my direction then repeats the gesture.
Maybe... I hold out my left hand myself.
Making a quick, sweeping motion again she contacts my arm with hers and holds it by my wrist. I nearly jerk it away again in reaction to her touch, but I stop myself, wanting to see if she wants to do what I'm thinking.
I was right. Checking my hand and finding the palm, she starts tracing lines on it with her finger.
P H O N E ?
...I was wrong before. Wanting a voice for screaming at her wasn't the highest point of my desire. I want one to laugh in her face now. The stupid bitch didn't think to carry hers along! Grinning, I shove my free hand in my pocket and...
And...
...
...And I write, reluctantly, in turn:
MISHA HAS MINE
Pride goes before the fall indeed. Satou shakes her head resignedly, and sighs.
S L O W E R
M I S H A - H A S - M I N E
...And fix your writing, you idiot, I add in my mind.
That was stupid of me, giving Misha my cellphone to hold. I have kept some building keys on me, but there's no need to mention this irrelevancy now. They wouldn't open doors in the administration section anyway, except for the room we were in.
She nods and leans back against the wall, looking thoughtful. I consider the situation as well.
We could sit tight and wait for morning to come, but it would be an uncomfortable night, and we would both look like idiots. Our reputation would suffer. ...Mine probably even more than hers. Those stories. EW.
Misha being gone is much more worrisome. She wouldn't just up and leave, on the contrary she would be trying to reach us. So she might even be more in need of help than us.
No way, waiting is out of the question. So, how do we get out?
We're on the third floor. There's no way either of us could climb down from here.
It's long past curfew, so even if we... no, even if Satou tried to shout for help, it's pretty unlikely we'd be noticed. Also, that'd be still embarrassing.
That leaves only one option: reaching the stairs by ourselves somehow.
I look upwards and ponder. Let's see if this might work.
W H E R E - D O E S - T H I S - L E A D ?
2 N D R Y - S T A I R
Y O U - S U R E ?
She nods.
W A I T
Without waiting for a response, I run to the lighted room and start dragging one of the chairs back with me. I bat Satou's hands away when she gets near me. Explaining would take more time than doing what I have in mind, and I don't need her help, even though the chair is heavy.
Once I have it in position, I pull her out of my way. Finally, I ask her.
G I V E - M E - Y O U R - C A N E
Satou looks puzzled and unhappy. Still, before I can do more than huff in exasperation, she hands it to me with a nod.
I blink in surprise. I was expecting her to put up much more resistance. Well, whatever.
I stand on the chair, take careful aim, and thrust the cane's tip as hard as I can towards what she couldn't know about...
The decorative glass half-circle above the door shatters after my second blow. I try pushing the resisting parts and sweeping the frame with the cane so as to make all the glass shards fall outside the door. It's not a perfect job, but it will have to do.
Hopping down, I hand the cane back to a smiling Satou. I suppose all the noise I must have made has told her all she wanted to know. Now for the last step.
B O O S T - M E - U P
She shakes her head. I - A M - T A L L E R
How the hell does she know... B R O K E N - G L A S S
She grimaces halfway through that, and nods. T H E N - W H A T ?
I bite my lower lip. I have no neat answer for this.
T H E N - Y O U - W A I T
Let's see what you are made of, Satou.
There's only the briefest pause before she nods decisively.
We move purposefully next to the door, taking our time setting everything up and, in Satou's case, familiarizing with distances and positioning. Finally, everything is to our satisfaction. Satou half-kneels on the chair, turning so as to present her interlaced hands towards me. I gingerly place my foot in the 'stirrup' she makes.
On my touch of three, we try.
...And we almost try too hard. I fairly fly up - I didn't expect her to be this strong. Desperately trying to change my course, I end up nearly halfway through the arch instead of hanging by the doorjamb with my arms through like I was thinking.
I hiss in pain. Since I couldn't pick my landing spot as I wanted to, I'm getting splinters in my belly. Damn it, I might as well have left this to Satou.
Grunting, I get rid of what remaining glass I can reach before trying to swing through.
That proves easy enough, since I am already this far past.
I get a glimpse of Satou's smiling face looking up at me before dropping down feetfirst on the other side.
***
There are a few satisfactory thumps and sounds of trying the door's handle from the opposite side of the door before Hakamichi's steps trail down and away beyond my hearing.
Well, well. How interesting.
I settle down in the chair and prepare myself for a wait. The only question is, how long will it be...
Hakamichi could very well decide to get away on her own, leaving me stranded. But if she does that, I think it will be infinitely better than any alternative. She'll have to remember that she betrayed the trust put in her. I might not understand her very well, but by all accounts, this SHOULD bug her to distraction.
Maybe I will not even mention her involvement in this if she doesn't, for maximum effect.
She might not manage to do anything. In that case, well... we're neither better nor worse off than when we started. Except for a massive door separating us. Yes, I think that should count as a minor benefit after all. I let out a little chuckle.
And finally, the third option: she gets us both free... because of my help.
Victory, draw, draw. Sorry, Shizune-chan, you can't win this one.
My reverie is shattered by steps and rattling sounds climbing closer. It has been only a few minutes, what could she have found...?
I get back on my feet, as the noise sets itself up right outside the door. More clomping ensues, until finally I hear a quick doubletap against the door, ahead of and a little higher up than my face.
And sure enough, reaching my hands in that direction, I find a hand waiting for me.
Getting through the aperture is unpleasant, but I manage to get by without more than a few scrapes and a little loss of dignity, thanks to Shizune's help. The stepladder she has on her side helps even more.
Dusting myself off, I stand near her. We are both breathing hard from our effort, and a faint aroma of sweat hangs in the air. I feel her twitch as I reach for her hand once again.
T H A N K S - L A D D E R ?
C O N S T R U C T I O N
I nod. She must have found access to one of the zones being renovated.
C O M E - N O W
I smile and nod again. I'll be glad to get to the end of this.
Getting downstairs is a cakewalk compared to what this night has been so far. Counting the steps and flights as usual, I realize that we're going all the way down to the ground floor. That's good, it'll be easier to find some means of egress this way. If need be, I'll gladly shatter a window myself and pay for it twice over.
Shizune has gone a little further than me down the stairs, and I'm not surprised when I hear some clinking and rattling sounds in front. She must be opening the door at the bottom.
What surprises me is that she's stopped right in the middle of the doorway when I make my way to it. Reaching out, I find that she's facing inside, and not moving.
She traces the letters almost harshly. C O N S T R U C T I O N - S I T E
A pause. P I T C H - B L A C K - F U R T H E R
A longer pause. I am nearly decided on saying something myself, when:
Y O U - L E A D - Y O U - A R E - B E T T E R
She thrusts something into my hand - a key chain, I quickly find out - and steps out of the way and slightly behind me, placing a hand on my shoulder.
...My my.
She rethinks her position one last time.
D O - N O T - G E T - U S - I N T O - A - P I T
I giggle at this last. Yes, Shizune, NOW we're talking.
The walk is not really all that hard. I take it extremely slowly and carefully, considering that we could be into hazardous territory, luckily though nothing much obstructs our process. Constantly tapping my cane in front, up, down and sideways like a feeler, I occasionally knock down what I assume to be leaning detritus or tools, but the sounds are almost comforting. Whiffs of dusty smells rise up now and then, but I don't disturb anything noxious.
I don't have to wonder how Shizune is taking this though.
Robbed of the most important sense to her, she has only me as a reference. Her hand doesn't tighten on my shoulder one single time, but I can feel her jittering, and my shoulder getting damp from her palm.
Finally, I prod something solid in front. The hand I'm using to follow the wall touches the inside of a corner, then a jamb. The door is locked, but this time, trying Shizune's keys in turn does the job.
I open the door, and hear her release her breath explosively. We must be getting into a lighted area. Getting out of the door and dangling the keys out to my side confirms it, as she quickly steps ahead and grabs them.
S T O R A G E - N E X T - T O - T H E - C O U N C I L - O F F I C E
W E - A R E - H O M E - F R E E
I nod, but I don't smile. Her mentioning the student council makes me recall our argument all over again.
Now that we are no longer in a tight spot, there's no reason for us not to revert to type.
*SNXXXXXXXXXX*
...AND WHAT IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT'S HOLY WAS THAT?
I jump back and scream a little. All this time without hearing any living sounds beyond those I make myself has left me weary enough to let my control slip. What could it have been? Some kind of beast? A maniac that is toying with us?
A couple of quick knocks near me make my scare recede. Right. Shizune. We're in two, and she can't hear it. I reach for her.
W H A T ?
A L I V E N O I S E
W H E R E ?
I point in the right direction. I hear Shizune's steps going that way. ...I am torn between letting her get eaten and helping her against this menace. DAMN, she has the keys. I follow.
We close on the source. I can't hear that horrible noise any more, but there's some movement ahead. And it's not Shizune. I reach her, or more precisely I bump into her back as she stops suddenly.
***
'Mmmmnyum~?'
I am awoken by some sort of ungodly clatter. Blinking my eyes sleepily, I can see an empty drink can slowly rolling to a stop on the floor in the glow of the vending machine's light. I right myself from the uncomfortable sleeping position I had assumed on the bench, and let out a huge yawn while stretching mightily.
'Oohhhh, I am going to get cricks from this... huh?'
Something is not right.
Scratch that: something is DEFINITELY not right AT ALL. Shicchan and Satou are looking - well, I guess 'looking' isn't right in the case of Satou, but still - at me wearing the most dumbfounded expressions possible. They both also look a little worse for wear. Maybe they had a catfight?
Then again, maybe not... I mean, the way Satou is giggling and holding on to Shicchan's shoulder isn't something you would do with your enemy.
'Umm, what is so funny? Ah - hey, I'm sorry... I must have dozed off for a few minutes just after getting my drink. I'm such a ditz~. Sorry that you two had to come look for me.'
I'm desperately signing as I speak, trying to make light of the incident. Doesn't look like it's going to be much use though, as Shicchan is turning away. Uh... her back is quaking?
'Er, Satou-san, maybe you could tell me if... jeez, could you PLEASE stop laughing so hard...? What is...? Oh, whatever. Don't mind me.'
Clearly there's a big joke involved, and I'm not going to be let in on it. I stand up and try to stretch the kinks out of my spine, letting those two support each other to avoid falling down.
***
'It has been quite an interesting night, Satou-san. We had better adjourn for now.'
'Yes, I agree entirely, Hakamichi-san. My, it's gotten quite late, hasn't it?'
'Indeed. Misha, you are dismissed. We'll talk later.'
Wincing, Misha bids us goodnight and scampers away quickly.
We are left in front of the Main Building, wind plucking at our clothes.
Just one thing left to be done.
I extend my hand, wearing my brightest smile.
I clasp the proffered hand, in a friendly handshake.
My other hand moves to the back of the hand being shaken.
B I T C H
W H O R E
We turn our back on each other, and go quietly into the night.
-SC
