Flowers in my mind
Posted: Sun Oct 03, 2010 12:46 pm
Since some of the FFs here really impressed (and motivated) me and writing is kind of a hobby for me, I finished my own FF now.
It focuses on Hisao and Lilly.
Well, I do not think there is much to say. I hope it is readable and does not include too many ugly grammar mistakes.
Maybe some of you will like it.
Of course I appreciate any kind of critic.
Flowers in my mind
Usually I am not the type who gets fascinated by the aura a flowerbed can create. But right now I am just amazed. The brightness which comes from hundreds upon hundreds of flowers right in front of me includes such a beautiful and kind atmosphere that I just can not help it but to get overwhelmed by this gorgeous presence. There are yellow blossoms as bright as the sun which harmonize with the azure blue glance of their neighboring blossoms like the sun does with the ocean. There are tremendous amounts of purple flowers which build a remarkable contrast to the powerful light the orange ones send out that almost looks like a blazing fire. There are white flowers enclosing the whole breathtaking scenery. I could talk in that dizzy way all the day and I would not get finished with the description of this unearthly view. If I think about it, it might just be impossible to put such a sight into words. I do not waste my thoughts on thinking how I might have come here or where such a place could actually exist. My mind is completely devoured by the stunning sight reflecting itself in my eyes. I can not say how long I have been standing here already doing nothing but observing the flowers and their movements caused by the wind. A few hours maybe? A day? A week? I can not tell. Still caught by dizziness I wonder how the flowers look like if you walk right through them. Slowly and hesitating I take one step after another and approach the sea of flowers. My heart starts beating faster with every step I take. Now I am near enough to count the leafs of the first blossoms. Only one or two more steps separate me from them. With shivering hands I reach out to those wonderful blossoms and......
BUMM!
All the flowers vanish with one single blow and my vision turns completely dark. While I am still thinking whether there was an announcement to demolish the school or if it could be that guy I open my eyes and find myself in my bed not looking at some beautiful flowers but at my pretty unspectacular ceiling. Then without hesitation my question answers itself.
"Hey! Are you in there dude?!"
BUMM!
I wonder what Kenji is doing out there causing such a magnificent noise.
"Kenji! What the hell are you doing there?"
Well, if I think about it, it is unnecessary to ask....
"I am preparing for the arrival of the enemies forces you idiot! What else should I do here?"
Yeah, that is the answer I expected, but still....
"What is that horrific noise out there? Do you know how early it is?"
For a few seconds I do not hear any reply. Then I notice that Kenji is chuckling. This is a bad omen....
"Kenji? What are you up to?"
His answer sounds a bit maniac since he is still chuckling.
"May I present my new weapon to you? The ultimate Omega Distortion Mjöllnir!!!"
I sigh in relief. It seems he just bought a new tool or something which he uses to make an....wait a minute! Mjöllnir? He is not really.....
BUMM!
I jump out of my bed and run towards the door despite the fact that I am still wearing my pyjamas. As I open the door I see my premonition confirmed. Kenji is holding a hammer almost larger than himself and lunges out for a new strike.
"Are you insane!!??! Wh-what is the meaning behi....no I do not want to hear it. Just stop immediately and get the hell back to your room!"
I just can not believe it. What on earth must be going on in the mind of a boy who strikes the walls of a school with a hammer in the morning? Kenji does not seem to be shocked about my little explosion. Actually he looks amused for some reason.
"So it works, huh? I am sorry dude, but I needed a test subject for my precious Mjöllnir. Hm...I guess if even you get shocked by its power the enemy should not stand a chance against it."
He smiles viciously. I take a deep breath and suppress my anger with all my might.
Finally I answer: " So, if you say Mjöllnir....are you saying that you actually consider yourself a god?"
Kenji frowns before he smiles and answers.
"Heh, that is a good idea man! I did not think about that until now but now that you mentioned it...."
....guess that was the wrong question. Suddenly I hear steps coming nearer. Oh oh, I was so angry that I forgot the fact that not only me but the half school must have heard Kenjis "test".
"Damn, that is bad. I can not let them take my trump card yet."
And with those words he hurries back into his room.
I follow his example since I do not want to get involved in this whole thing anymore. Covering myself with my blanket I pray that they do not knock against my door. Guess I should consider myself really lucky since Mjöllnir did not break the wall.... *Tap tap tap* The steps become more silent until they completely disappear. A big sigh of relief escapes my mouth while I stand up and change into my school uniform. There are still two hours left until my first lesson starts so I guess I will take a little walk and get something for breakfast.
Emi would be happy if she could see my breakfast. It is a simple salad with some carrots, tomatoes and peppers in it. Well, it is not that delicious but better than nothing. I take my bowl and go out to the school yard with it since I need some fresh air and do not want to eat in the cafeteria. As I leave the building my eyes focus on a little flowerbed with many roses on it. That reminds me of the strange dream I had this morning. It really was strange since I never had that kind of dream before.
"Kind of stupid...", I murmur to myself while sticking one of the carrots into my mouth.
"My my, could that be Hisao?"
I almost drop the bowl with the salad after hearing that familiar voice all of a sudden.
"L-Lilly, it is you...", I stammer and quickly slug down the carrot. The beautiful girl looks a bit worried.
"I am sorry. I did not mean to startle you. Are you okay?"
"Oh, it is nothing, really. I was just...spaced out a little."
I laugh nervously. Lilly looks still a bit uneasy and takes a few more steps towards me until her cane touches my left food.
"Spaced out you say? And why is that?"
"Well, it is a bit complicated, you see...."
She smiles and folds her hands about the cane.
"Then why do not you tell me? There is still some time left until classes are about to start. So there is enough time to share your story with me."
She frowns for a moment as she adds: "Or do I bother you?"
"Of course not! It is just that....um..."
I just feel a bit uncomfortable to tell her. It would be pretty awkward to talk about this dream. And even if I do tell her, what would be the meaning of it anyway? I mean there is no point about telling her that I am dreaming of a gorgeous sea of flowers and that this flowerbed here reminded me of it.
Lilly sighs but does not put off her wonderful smile. My mumbling must really sound stupid. She turns around, apparently with the aim to leave.
"If you do not want to talk about it I guess it can not be helped. Have a nice day Hisao."
And with those words she returns to the building leaving me behind like an idiot. Well, to be honest I acted like an absolutely idiot. Lilly is trying to start a conversation with me and everything I do is stumbling like an idiot. Angry about myself I slurp back to my room.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I do not follow Mutous words after all since I am still in a bad mood. I started my first lesson without any motivation and there has not come up any of it during the day so I doubt this will change now in the last 10 minutes of my last lesson.
"Nakai, are you listening?"
Damn! He must have noticed my glance to the clock.
"Uh...sure."
Mutou does not look mollified.
"Then I am sure it will not be a problem for you to present the homework next lesson."
He turns to the rest of the class.
"Of course everyone of you has to do it. Sum up the theory of relativity in your own words and use it on the example given in your books."
The whole class sighs at once as the bell announces the end of the lesson. I leave the class room even more depressed. Who on earth can understand only one thing that crazy Einstein is saying? Geez, that is going to be really....
Suddenly I notice a girl with long golden hair who is leaving the building and obviously heading to the garden. That is it! Since the beginning and the central part of this day have been pretty bad until now, I will try to make at least its end a good one. I follow the girl silently and as soon as we are out I tap her shoulder.
"Excuse me, Lilly."
She twitches as she feels my finger touching her out of nowhere but as soon as she recognizes my voice she begins to smile.
"Hello Hisao. Is there anything I can do for you?"
"Well, yeah.... Do you....do you mind if we continue our conversation from this morning?"
First she looks a bit irritated but then she seems to remember and smiles even broader.
"So you want to tell me about your little dizziness at last?"
"Sure, if you do not mind...."
"Of course not. I am the one who wanted to know, right?"
I smile back to her, happy that she still wants to talk to me.
"Shall we talk in the garden then?"
"Sure."
We leave the building and head to the central of the school garden. I see a bench there right next to a pretty flowerbed filled with roses and daffodils. Before I can ask Lilly whether we should sit down there she approaches the bench by the navigation of her cane and takes a seat. She must know this area really well. Still wearing her beautiful smile she signs me to sit down next to her. I follow her order and take a seat a few centimeters next to her since I do not want to seem intrusive. We sit there quiet for a while and look right to the flowerbed. It is a bit sad that Lilly can not see such pretty flowers whose beauty is even obvious for an amateur like me who never had a green thumb or something like that... While I am still watching the flowers in silence Lilly suddenly interrupts my thoughts.
"They are beautiful, are not they?"
I turn to her irritated.
"Uhm, yes they are. But how...I mean, well..."
Great, I start babbling again! But fortunately, Lilly does not look annoyed.
"You wonder how I can tell?"
"Well....yes."
She closes her eyes and is obviously enjoying the wind blowing through her hair. The sight of her golden hair moving around that lovely cheeks makes my heart beating faster. I hope I do not have to visit the Nurse after this little talk...
"I may not be able to see them but I can still imagine their beauty in my mind."
Well...that is not convincing. I can imagine a bunch of roses too but it is just not the same as to look at them with your very own eyes. Lilly seems to feel my doubts as she continues.
"I guess you do not understand. I am not just imagining some random images of roses. I create a completely new picture with the hints I have got."
"Hints?"
"Correct. Do you feel the wind right now Hisao? That is one of these hints as well as the shape of the blossoms over there. I visit this place many times so it is not like I never had the chance to touch them. I know exactly what they feel like. And if I recreate their form in my mind considering the wind then it is like I would......see them right through my eyes."
Silence. After this little explanation there is nothing to hear except the quiet whisper of the wind which is now whirling around some of the rose petals. This silence lasts for a few seconds until....
"You are amazing Lilly."
It slipped through my mouth before I could do anything to stop it. Lilly turns her face to my direction and seems both, surprised and a bit awkward. I guess I should add something before this situation gets really uncomfortable.
"It is just that....you have such a confident kind to handle things despite your....disadvantage. I could never handle my life that easily although I do not have such a problem! Since I came to Yamaku I was absolutely clueless how to go on and that has not changed until now. To be honest, it will never change. I just do not know what I should do! I just feel that I do not belong here. Everyone here seems to do fine despite his handicaps and I am the only one who just can not handle it. What on earth am
I supposed to do? I can not.....I just can not come up with a solution, damn it!"
All the sorrow that had tortured me since I came here bursts out with a single explosion. I am shivering and do even feel a tear running down my cheek. Great Hisao! Great! That is the way to make things more comfortable! How pitiful. I am about to cry in front of the girl I began to develop feelings for since the school festival. Well...maybe....maybe that is just the proof that there are worlds between me and her which will never allow me to reach her. Yeah, I guess that is.........wh-what? Suddenly I feel a pleasuring warmth covering my hand. I look down to my right hand and see something that I just......can not believe! Lillys hand is holding on firmly to my own. Her slender fingers embrace my palm in a firm but gentle way which causes a feeling I can not describe with words. Before I get the chance to ask something she already begins to speak.
"Hisao....there is no need to be that precarious. I thought I have already told you that some days ago."
Yeah, she did. But still...
"You are still not used to the academy. So it is no surprise that you are not in control of your heart and all the other new things yet. Do you really think everyone here was able to manage this new lifestyle in a couple of days? That is not the case."
She strengthens her grasp even more. My heart makes a jump by the cause of the pressure that comes from her fingers as well as from her words. She has a point there. But still....
"Hisao, please listen to me. If you continue to think like that you will never become happy here. And.....I do not want that to happen. So please, try to leave your stupid doubts behind you. If not for yourself then please do it for me."
I stop breathing for a moment. Is she really worrying about me? The most beautiful girl in Yamaku cares about a stupid newbie who is completely lost in his new lifestyle? That can not be real. But the sensation coming from the pressure of Lillys fingers is telling me something different. She has stopped talking now. We sit there again in silence for a moment until I finally ask her the question that is haunting in my mind.
"Lilly, why do you care about me that much?"
I expect her to look uneasy and annoyed. It would not even surprise me if she takes her cane now and leaves after such a stupid question. But her reaction is completely different. She...yeah, she is actually smiling right now! As I look at her in astonishment she finally responses.
"Because I like you, Hisao."
Amazing what kind of effect such a simple answer can cause on a humans body. The sorrow that had captured me until now is instantly making way for a flood of amazement and happiness. I am not shivering anymore and I can not feel any new tears either.
"Lilly...thank you."
That is all I manage to say. I want to tell her so much more but right now I can only come up with these words. But Lilly seems to understand me since she squeezes my hand slightly as an answer, still wearing that beautiful smile that I love so much. A few minutes pass by while we are sitting there enjoying the wind tingling around our faces. Then suddenly Lilly asks me a question.
"So, did not you want to tell me about your dizziness from this morning, Hisao?"
Geez, she is right. I completely forgot about that in the course our conversation had taken. And so I tell her about the dream I had this morning. I tell her every single detail I remember from the wonderful flowers I saw and how this whole sight affected me. When I am finished the sun has already set. The orange glow is engulfing Lillys face which looks a bit tired now. I guess it is time to go back to the academy.
"That is really an interesting dream you are talking about. But...you know, if I think about it, maybe it gives you an idea of the way I am able to see things that are right before me. That is...kind of pleasant if you ask me. Hehe."
"Yeah, I understand what you mean."
I say so with a smile on my lips. Who knows? Maybe Lilly can see even that with her special eyes.
"The sun has already set. Shall we go back now?"
"Sure."
We leave the garden and head back to the school building. When we reach in the main hall I say goodbye to Lilly. She nods in response and as I turn around:
"That was a wonderful day Hisao. Please make sure to keep the flowers we saw together in your mind."
I smile as I answer.
"I will. Good night Lilly."
"Good night Hisao."
As soon as I am back in my room I fall onto my bed and look up to the ceiling still smiling. So this stupid day was finally able to turn into a wonderful one. Lilly, let us talk again.....tomorrow.
It focuses on Hisao and Lilly.
Well, I do not think there is much to say. I hope it is readable and does not include too many ugly grammar mistakes.
Maybe some of you will like it.
Of course I appreciate any kind of critic.
Flowers in my mind
Usually I am not the type who gets fascinated by the aura a flowerbed can create. But right now I am just amazed. The brightness which comes from hundreds upon hundreds of flowers right in front of me includes such a beautiful and kind atmosphere that I just can not help it but to get overwhelmed by this gorgeous presence. There are yellow blossoms as bright as the sun which harmonize with the azure blue glance of their neighboring blossoms like the sun does with the ocean. There are tremendous amounts of purple flowers which build a remarkable contrast to the powerful light the orange ones send out that almost looks like a blazing fire. There are white flowers enclosing the whole breathtaking scenery. I could talk in that dizzy way all the day and I would not get finished with the description of this unearthly view. If I think about it, it might just be impossible to put such a sight into words. I do not waste my thoughts on thinking how I might have come here or where such a place could actually exist. My mind is completely devoured by the stunning sight reflecting itself in my eyes. I can not say how long I have been standing here already doing nothing but observing the flowers and their movements caused by the wind. A few hours maybe? A day? A week? I can not tell. Still caught by dizziness I wonder how the flowers look like if you walk right through them. Slowly and hesitating I take one step after another and approach the sea of flowers. My heart starts beating faster with every step I take. Now I am near enough to count the leafs of the first blossoms. Only one or two more steps separate me from them. With shivering hands I reach out to those wonderful blossoms and......
BUMM!
All the flowers vanish with one single blow and my vision turns completely dark. While I am still thinking whether there was an announcement to demolish the school or if it could be that guy I open my eyes and find myself in my bed not looking at some beautiful flowers but at my pretty unspectacular ceiling. Then without hesitation my question answers itself.
"Hey! Are you in there dude?!"
BUMM!
I wonder what Kenji is doing out there causing such a magnificent noise.
"Kenji! What the hell are you doing there?"
Well, if I think about it, it is unnecessary to ask....
"I am preparing for the arrival of the enemies forces you idiot! What else should I do here?"
Yeah, that is the answer I expected, but still....
"What is that horrific noise out there? Do you know how early it is?"
For a few seconds I do not hear any reply. Then I notice that Kenji is chuckling. This is a bad omen....
"Kenji? What are you up to?"
His answer sounds a bit maniac since he is still chuckling.
"May I present my new weapon to you? The ultimate Omega Distortion Mjöllnir!!!"
I sigh in relief. It seems he just bought a new tool or something which he uses to make an....wait a minute! Mjöllnir? He is not really.....
BUMM!
I jump out of my bed and run towards the door despite the fact that I am still wearing my pyjamas. As I open the door I see my premonition confirmed. Kenji is holding a hammer almost larger than himself and lunges out for a new strike.
"Are you insane!!??! Wh-what is the meaning behi....no I do not want to hear it. Just stop immediately and get the hell back to your room!"
I just can not believe it. What on earth must be going on in the mind of a boy who strikes the walls of a school with a hammer in the morning? Kenji does not seem to be shocked about my little explosion. Actually he looks amused for some reason.
"So it works, huh? I am sorry dude, but I needed a test subject for my precious Mjöllnir. Hm...I guess if even you get shocked by its power the enemy should not stand a chance against it."
He smiles viciously. I take a deep breath and suppress my anger with all my might.
Finally I answer: " So, if you say Mjöllnir....are you saying that you actually consider yourself a god?"
Kenji frowns before he smiles and answers.
"Heh, that is a good idea man! I did not think about that until now but now that you mentioned it...."
....guess that was the wrong question. Suddenly I hear steps coming nearer. Oh oh, I was so angry that I forgot the fact that not only me but the half school must have heard Kenjis "test".
"Damn, that is bad. I can not let them take my trump card yet."
And with those words he hurries back into his room.
I follow his example since I do not want to get involved in this whole thing anymore. Covering myself with my blanket I pray that they do not knock against my door. Guess I should consider myself really lucky since Mjöllnir did not break the wall.... *Tap tap tap* The steps become more silent until they completely disappear. A big sigh of relief escapes my mouth while I stand up and change into my school uniform. There are still two hours left until my first lesson starts so I guess I will take a little walk and get something for breakfast.
Emi would be happy if she could see my breakfast. It is a simple salad with some carrots, tomatoes and peppers in it. Well, it is not that delicious but better than nothing. I take my bowl and go out to the school yard with it since I need some fresh air and do not want to eat in the cafeteria. As I leave the building my eyes focus on a little flowerbed with many roses on it. That reminds me of the strange dream I had this morning. It really was strange since I never had that kind of dream before.
"Kind of stupid...", I murmur to myself while sticking one of the carrots into my mouth.
"My my, could that be Hisao?"
I almost drop the bowl with the salad after hearing that familiar voice all of a sudden.
"L-Lilly, it is you...", I stammer and quickly slug down the carrot. The beautiful girl looks a bit worried.
"I am sorry. I did not mean to startle you. Are you okay?"
"Oh, it is nothing, really. I was just...spaced out a little."
I laugh nervously. Lilly looks still a bit uneasy and takes a few more steps towards me until her cane touches my left food.
"Spaced out you say? And why is that?"
"Well, it is a bit complicated, you see...."
She smiles and folds her hands about the cane.
"Then why do not you tell me? There is still some time left until classes are about to start. So there is enough time to share your story with me."
She frowns for a moment as she adds: "Or do I bother you?"
"Of course not! It is just that....um..."
I just feel a bit uncomfortable to tell her. It would be pretty awkward to talk about this dream. And even if I do tell her, what would be the meaning of it anyway? I mean there is no point about telling her that I am dreaming of a gorgeous sea of flowers and that this flowerbed here reminded me of it.
Lilly sighs but does not put off her wonderful smile. My mumbling must really sound stupid. She turns around, apparently with the aim to leave.
"If you do not want to talk about it I guess it can not be helped. Have a nice day Hisao."
And with those words she returns to the building leaving me behind like an idiot. Well, to be honest I acted like an absolutely idiot. Lilly is trying to start a conversation with me and everything I do is stumbling like an idiot. Angry about myself I slurp back to my room.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I do not follow Mutous words after all since I am still in a bad mood. I started my first lesson without any motivation and there has not come up any of it during the day so I doubt this will change now in the last 10 minutes of my last lesson.
"Nakai, are you listening?"
Damn! He must have noticed my glance to the clock.
"Uh...sure."
Mutou does not look mollified.
"Then I am sure it will not be a problem for you to present the homework next lesson."
He turns to the rest of the class.
"Of course everyone of you has to do it. Sum up the theory of relativity in your own words and use it on the example given in your books."
The whole class sighs at once as the bell announces the end of the lesson. I leave the class room even more depressed. Who on earth can understand only one thing that crazy Einstein is saying? Geez, that is going to be really....
Suddenly I notice a girl with long golden hair who is leaving the building and obviously heading to the garden. That is it! Since the beginning and the central part of this day have been pretty bad until now, I will try to make at least its end a good one. I follow the girl silently and as soon as we are out I tap her shoulder.
"Excuse me, Lilly."
She twitches as she feels my finger touching her out of nowhere but as soon as she recognizes my voice she begins to smile.
"Hello Hisao. Is there anything I can do for you?"
"Well, yeah.... Do you....do you mind if we continue our conversation from this morning?"
First she looks a bit irritated but then she seems to remember and smiles even broader.
"So you want to tell me about your little dizziness at last?"
"Sure, if you do not mind...."
"Of course not. I am the one who wanted to know, right?"
I smile back to her, happy that she still wants to talk to me.
"Shall we talk in the garden then?"
"Sure."
We leave the building and head to the central of the school garden. I see a bench there right next to a pretty flowerbed filled with roses and daffodils. Before I can ask Lilly whether we should sit down there she approaches the bench by the navigation of her cane and takes a seat. She must know this area really well. Still wearing her beautiful smile she signs me to sit down next to her. I follow her order and take a seat a few centimeters next to her since I do not want to seem intrusive. We sit there quiet for a while and look right to the flowerbed. It is a bit sad that Lilly can not see such pretty flowers whose beauty is even obvious for an amateur like me who never had a green thumb or something like that... While I am still watching the flowers in silence Lilly suddenly interrupts my thoughts.
"They are beautiful, are not they?"
I turn to her irritated.
"Uhm, yes they are. But how...I mean, well..."
Great, I start babbling again! But fortunately, Lilly does not look annoyed.
"You wonder how I can tell?"
"Well....yes."
She closes her eyes and is obviously enjoying the wind blowing through her hair. The sight of her golden hair moving around that lovely cheeks makes my heart beating faster. I hope I do not have to visit the Nurse after this little talk...
"I may not be able to see them but I can still imagine their beauty in my mind."
Well...that is not convincing. I can imagine a bunch of roses too but it is just not the same as to look at them with your very own eyes. Lilly seems to feel my doubts as she continues.
"I guess you do not understand. I am not just imagining some random images of roses. I create a completely new picture with the hints I have got."
"Hints?"
"Correct. Do you feel the wind right now Hisao? That is one of these hints as well as the shape of the blossoms over there. I visit this place many times so it is not like I never had the chance to touch them. I know exactly what they feel like. And if I recreate their form in my mind considering the wind then it is like I would......see them right through my eyes."
Silence. After this little explanation there is nothing to hear except the quiet whisper of the wind which is now whirling around some of the rose petals. This silence lasts for a few seconds until....
"You are amazing Lilly."
It slipped through my mouth before I could do anything to stop it. Lilly turns her face to my direction and seems both, surprised and a bit awkward. I guess I should add something before this situation gets really uncomfortable.
"It is just that....you have such a confident kind to handle things despite your....disadvantage. I could never handle my life that easily although I do not have such a problem! Since I came to Yamaku I was absolutely clueless how to go on and that has not changed until now. To be honest, it will never change. I just do not know what I should do! I just feel that I do not belong here. Everyone here seems to do fine despite his handicaps and I am the only one who just can not handle it. What on earth am
I supposed to do? I can not.....I just can not come up with a solution, damn it!"
All the sorrow that had tortured me since I came here bursts out with a single explosion. I am shivering and do even feel a tear running down my cheek. Great Hisao! Great! That is the way to make things more comfortable! How pitiful. I am about to cry in front of the girl I began to develop feelings for since the school festival. Well...maybe....maybe that is just the proof that there are worlds between me and her which will never allow me to reach her. Yeah, I guess that is.........wh-what? Suddenly I feel a pleasuring warmth covering my hand. I look down to my right hand and see something that I just......can not believe! Lillys hand is holding on firmly to my own. Her slender fingers embrace my palm in a firm but gentle way which causes a feeling I can not describe with words. Before I get the chance to ask something she already begins to speak.
"Hisao....there is no need to be that precarious. I thought I have already told you that some days ago."
Yeah, she did. But still...
"You are still not used to the academy. So it is no surprise that you are not in control of your heart and all the other new things yet. Do you really think everyone here was able to manage this new lifestyle in a couple of days? That is not the case."
She strengthens her grasp even more. My heart makes a jump by the cause of the pressure that comes from her fingers as well as from her words. She has a point there. But still....
"Hisao, please listen to me. If you continue to think like that you will never become happy here. And.....I do not want that to happen. So please, try to leave your stupid doubts behind you. If not for yourself then please do it for me."
I stop breathing for a moment. Is she really worrying about me? The most beautiful girl in Yamaku cares about a stupid newbie who is completely lost in his new lifestyle? That can not be real. But the sensation coming from the pressure of Lillys fingers is telling me something different. She has stopped talking now. We sit there again in silence for a moment until I finally ask her the question that is haunting in my mind.
"Lilly, why do you care about me that much?"
I expect her to look uneasy and annoyed. It would not even surprise me if she takes her cane now and leaves after such a stupid question. But her reaction is completely different. She...yeah, she is actually smiling right now! As I look at her in astonishment she finally responses.
"Because I like you, Hisao."
Amazing what kind of effect such a simple answer can cause on a humans body. The sorrow that had captured me until now is instantly making way for a flood of amazement and happiness. I am not shivering anymore and I can not feel any new tears either.
"Lilly...thank you."
That is all I manage to say. I want to tell her so much more but right now I can only come up with these words. But Lilly seems to understand me since she squeezes my hand slightly as an answer, still wearing that beautiful smile that I love so much. A few minutes pass by while we are sitting there enjoying the wind tingling around our faces. Then suddenly Lilly asks me a question.
"So, did not you want to tell me about your dizziness from this morning, Hisao?"
Geez, she is right. I completely forgot about that in the course our conversation had taken. And so I tell her about the dream I had this morning. I tell her every single detail I remember from the wonderful flowers I saw and how this whole sight affected me. When I am finished the sun has already set. The orange glow is engulfing Lillys face which looks a bit tired now. I guess it is time to go back to the academy.
"That is really an interesting dream you are talking about. But...you know, if I think about it, maybe it gives you an idea of the way I am able to see things that are right before me. That is...kind of pleasant if you ask me. Hehe."
"Yeah, I understand what you mean."
I say so with a smile on my lips. Who knows? Maybe Lilly can see even that with her special eyes.
"The sun has already set. Shall we go back now?"
"Sure."
We leave the garden and head back to the school building. When we reach in the main hall I say goodbye to Lilly. She nods in response and as I turn around:
"That was a wonderful day Hisao. Please make sure to keep the flowers we saw together in your mind."
I smile as I answer.
"I will. Good night Lilly."
"Good night Hisao."
As soon as I am back in my room I fall onto my bed and look up to the ceiling still smiling. So this stupid day was finally able to turn into a wonderful one. Lilly, let us talk again.....tomorrow.