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Smoku wrote:

kosherbacon wrote: Lilly x Kenji bromance, mabye?

noooo! don't destroy my Lilly image with that drunken moron!

Sorry in advance. Yep, another long-ass conversation. It's three in the morning, I had this crazy ass idea that just needed to get out of my head, and I was in the mood for crack pairings and character derailment.

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Lilly sat in the tea room facing the window. Obviously she wasn't actually looking out the window but she was doing the same sort of spacing out that sighted people do when they mindlessly stare at the outside world from within. She had much on her mind but was in no mood to actually grab a hold of any given thought and dwell on it. Being alone in the room was reminder enough that her friends had abandoned her for the day to go on a date in town. Hisao and Hanako invited her to come along but she knew better than to impose on them. Not wanting to be reminded of her solitude, Lilly did her best to forget her feelings and just bask in the sunlight. Well, it's probably sunlight anyway.

"I'm happy for them. I really am." she said to herself, chasing away a pang of loneliness. Was she really happy? When she and Hanako first met, she found a kindred spirit and they fast became close friends. Somewhere along the line, however, Lilly had forgotten that without Hanako, she was almost as isolated from the world as Hanako was. She had no problems interacting with most people, but somehow they all seemed to be a world apart. Was it her disability? Her attitude? Her family background? Or maybe people were put off by her foreign looks. That last bit was especially hard to comprehend.

Fortunately for Lilly, her depressing train of thought was interrupted by a visitor barging into the room.

"Yo Hisao, you in here? I'm going to..." Kenji flinched at a familiar blonde blob in his vision. "YOU!! Satou! What'd you do to Hisao?"

"Oh hello Kenji." Lilly smiled. She was quite familiar with Kenji's eccentricities and had long gotten over any animosity towards him. "I'm afraid that Hisao and Hanako are in town right now. They won't be back until this evening."

"Hm. So you had your girlfriend dispose of him. I'm afraid you'll find Hisao isn't a chump that'd go down easily." Kenji straightened his glasses as he calmed down.

Lilly laughed, "Well, I guess my gir-" Something tugged at her heart. For the first time in a perhaps years, something Kenji said managed to press one of Lilly's buttons.

"K-Kenji, what'd you just say? About my.."

"Girlfriend? Aren't you and Ikezawa like, totally gay for each other?"

"Who said we were?"

"Approxomately... everyone." Kenji said with a grin. Maybe THAT was why everyone has been keeping their distance from Lilly. Did she feel love for her? Did it really show?

"Oh, well. I'm afraid there isn't much substance to that rumor anymore." Said Lilly, followed by a forced laugh. Now was not the time to shut down and brood on that revelation, especially not in front of Kenji.

"Was there something you needed Hisao for? Perhaps a message I can relay to him?"

"Eh? No. None of your business. I was just passing through and I know he comes here sometimes."

"You miss him too, huh?" She said with a sigh. "It seems that we've been widowed by our friends' romance. I guess all we can do is watch from afar."

"You'll WHAT from afar?" Kenji said, clenching up from the possibility that Ms. Satou had been faking her blindness all along.

"It's just an expression, Kenji." Lilly, replied, finally smiling. "I can't literally watch them." Something about Kenji's minor freakout made her laugh, loosening the binds of her melancholy cell.

"You've been feeling up too many romance novels Satou."

Again, Lilly laughed, surprised that she wasn't finding Kenji's presence distasteful. "Oh my! Where are my manners? Would you like some tea? I don't have any ready but if you wait a couple minutes..."

"Hrmph. Thanks, Satou, but I'd rather not be poisoned."

"If you're worried, I'll have some with you."

"For all I know you've built up an immunity to whatever the hell you put in your tea. Or maybe it's something that wouldn't affect you like a testicle-eating virus."

This time, Lilly laughed with a decidedly unladylike snort. She honestly couldn't tell if Kenji actually believed the words that came out of his mouth.

"Besides, I've got some of my uncle's moonshine with me if I get thirsty" he said, audibly tapping a hip flask hidden in his coat pocket.

"Oh? Perhaps you'd like to share some?" asked Lilly, holding up an unwashed teacup from earlier this morning. "Perhaps with me or... maybe with one of the staff on the disciplinary board?"

Already regretting falling into that trap, Kenji took the flask out of his pocket and opened it. Letting his guard down like that was an amateurish mistake. Even if Lilly wasn't a girl, she WAS still his class rep and flaunting contraband in front of a council rep is never a good idea.

"This is blackmail, you know" he grumbled, pouring about a shot and a half worth into the teacup. "This is top notch firewater anyway. It's your funeral, man."

Immediately, Lilly downed the cup's contents and wiped the edges of her mouth with a napkin. "It's quite smooth actually."

Somewhat impressed that she didn't go down in a fit of choking and coughing, Kenji crept closer to Lilly, until he could smell the booze on her breath. This was the first time he's ever actually gotten a good look at her.

"Hm. Interesting" he said, disapprovingly.

"Hm?"

"You know, Satou, you're not terrible looking..."

"Oh, why... thank you!"

"...so why the hell are you in here cooped up like that Elephant Man guy from the movies? You're not a lunatic and you don't seem to be a colossal bitch so what the hell are you doing?"

Stunned that Kenji would compliment her, even in his own eloquent way, Lilly let the truth spill out, her voice cracking. For all his faults, Kenji was a straightforward, honest man, and he'd appreciate the truth if he was presented with it. Besides, she figured, if she said anything too candid now, she could blame it on the alcohol, which had yet to kick in, if ever.

"I guess I'm lonely. I want Hanako back. I know it's a cruel thing to say but sometimes I just wish I could have her to myself. Hisao too. I just wish they didn't have to leave me behind."

"Wow, Satou. You women are pretty fucked up."

"Excuse me?"

"Man or woman, all you skeezers want is control. You'll latch onto something with your vagina teeth and suck the life out of it until it's dry, then you'll move on to another poor sap. Hisao might be a damned traitor for going out with your girl but I'm not going to be all vagina monster and tell him what to do with his life. If he wants to be someone's bitch, then it's life to throw away."

"I-I know. I know I should be happy for them but I can't help it." Lilly had always known that getting tough love and letting it all out was therapeutic but she was usually on the receiving end of someone else's issues.

Kenji crept closer, and to his surprise saw that Lilly was still smiling, but with tears welling up at the corner of her eyes. A moment earlier he was bracing for a hefty slap to the face he usually gets from giving a woman a piece of his mind. He thought about asking her if she was okay but he knew better than to let the enemy think he's trying to empathize with her. Lilly needed to be told what's up but he couldn't help but feel sorry for making her cry.

"Say, Satou. Do you know what time it is?"

Lilly pressed a button on her wristwatch. A disjointed electronic voice crackled "Eleven. Thirty. Six. A. M."

"Why do you ask?"

"I came in here earlier to offer Hisao some pizza. He spotted me some money a while back and I thought I'd repay him. Since he ain't here, I need someone to help me finish it. They cut off the power to the boys' dorms you see, so they can replace the listening devices and.."

"I'd be delighted to have lunch with you. What time?"

"Pizza should be here by noon."

"Great! I'll prepare some tea and get some dessert from the cafeteria. Will you bring some more of your family moonshine?"

"Yeah, whatever. Hey, Satou. Just to be clear, I'm not going to sleep with you, okay?"

"That's too bad."

"What."

noooooez!
How can she ever manage that Kenji crap ><


not bad of a story anyway

HOLY SHIT. THAT WAS AWSOME FOR SOME REASON. You actualy made me hate Kenji less. That was well done. Great job.

Part 2 where?

Swx wrote:Part 2 where?

Right here, yo I've learned recently that I almost never spell mabye correctly without a spell check. Oh, there I go again. May-Be. There.

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"Wh-why is it so dark in here, Hisao?"

"Oh, they cut off the power to this building earlier. Something about replacing the fire alarms or something. The note outside said that it'd be fixed by sundown."

It was only five in the afternoon but indeed the hallways of the boys' dorms had gotten quite dark. The halls don't have much in the way of windows, so without artificial light, the inside of the building had gotten dark not long after midday. Hopefully in a couple hours it'd be dark enough to put Hanako in the mood. Or at least it would soon be gloomy enough for her to want to hold on to him. Getting her to come back to his room took a feat of conversational acrobatics. Hisao was quite proud of himself.

"Hey, Hanako, is it okay if I check on my neighbor really quick? He doesn't do very well in unusual situations." Hanako nodded in approval. Poor Kenji must have been having a nervous breakdown this afternoon. Without his computer and surveillance equipment, he must have thought that the world as he knew it was coming to an end. Hisao did feel sorry for him but there was no way he could be talked into keeping Kenji company today. Not when he had a date, anyway.

"Hey Kenji! It's Hisao. You okay, bro?" Hisao yelled outside of the door, flinching at the last word. When exactly did Kenji become Hisao's "bro?" Still, he hoped that the half-assed attempt at camaraderie would calm the lunatic down.

A series of locks clicked and the door swung open, revealing Kenji's trademark striped scarf draped around a most unexpected neck.

"Hisaaaaooo!" Lilly slurred, practically falling out the doorway. "You're back!" Her hair was a tangled mess and was without her usual bow. It took a couple seconds for Hanako and Hisao to realize just who they were looking at.

"L-L-Lilly?? What are you doing here?" shrieked Hanako, realizing that she should have never left Lilly alone today.

"Oh! Oh! Hanako! Would you like some pizza?" Lilly's face was glowing red, bright enough to light up the dim hallway. "I was just checking on my classmates from homeroom."

"Psst," Hisao whispered into Hanako's ear. "Lilly's totally wasted, you should bring her home before someone sees her like this."

"Um. Lilly, I think you need to get some rest. Y-you don't look well." That was an understatement. Lilly was obviously shitfaced.

"You're so good to me, Hanako." Lilly grinned, after slumping herself around Hanako's shoulders. "C-can you stay with me for a while in my room?"

"Sh-sure Lilly." Hanako turned to face Hisao. "S-sorry about tonight. Mabye we can hang out in your room some other time." The two girls shuffled away, with Hanako visibly laboring to drag Lilly along. Hisao had hoped that he and Hanako could pick up where they left off after dropping off Lilly but it seemed that things weren't going to happen that way anymore. Perhaps telling Hanako to take Lilly home, no, checking on Kenji to begin with was a fatal mistake.

"Un-fucking-believable," Hisao thought to himself. Cock blocked again. Hisao wasn't any more perverted than any other kid his age, but damn it, he deserved something for all the dancing on eggshells he's been doing trying to get Hanako to open up to him. There would be hell to pay for this, but now for the obvious question: What was Lilly doing drunk in Kenji's room? And where was that twerp anyway?

"Allright, Kenji," Inquired Hisao as he pushed his way through Kenji's door, which was impeded with what seemed to be trash on the floor. "What's going on here?"

"Don't know what you're talking about, man." Kenji was standing by his desk, looking deeply satisfied.

"What did you do to Lilly? If you took advantage of her, so help me God..."

"Lilly who?" he smirked.

"Lilly Satou, moron. From your class! What was she doing in here?"

"Satou? Here? Impossible. No woman could possibly get past my countermeasures. All that happened here was pizza and whiskey."

"Dude, she was wearing your scarf and everything."

"My scarf?" Kenji started frantically feeling around his own neck. "MY SCARF! IT'S GONE!"

"Ugh, whatever." Hisao surrendered. There was no way he was going to get a straight answer out of Kenji without beating it out of him. For all he knew, nothing happened. Maybe Lilly had gotten drunk earlier and had wandered into Kenji's room while it was unlocked without him noticing. Between the darkness, Kenji's eyesight, and his own brand of crazy, it all seemed shockingly plausible. "I'll be in the library if you need me."

"Yo, keep an eye out for my scarf," Kenji grunted, locking the door behind Hisao. "Sorry bro, but you couldn't handle the truth" he said to himself, paraphrasing some foreign movie he only remembers for that soundbite.

Kenji neglected cleaning up the mess on the floor and crashed onto his bed to digest the new intel he gathered this afternoon. After sorting out some details he came to a grim conclusion.

Lilly had used him to get over Hanako. He had seen similar emotional recoveries outlined in Feminazi propaganda films(AKA romantic comedies) involving a rituals such as "girls night out" and "retail therapy." Today didn't happen like that, though. There were no fruity drinks, no man hating while getting pedicures, no mountains of freshly bought shoes. It was like being with another guy, just drinking, eating, shooting the breeze, and some other things... And that last thought process brought him to an even scarier conclusion.

He didn't mind it at all. Not only that, but he did actually have fun hanging out with Lilly. He wasn't friends with her, was he? Was it respect he was feeling? Was she a worthy opponent that who deserved admiration, like General Patton's Rommel? These thoughts were confusing but oddly, not upsetting. Whatever he and Lilly had, it probably wasn't love. Kenji's scientifically designed checklist of romantic symptoms told him that it wasn't. Or was it? For now he settled on friendly adversaries.

"Lilly, you magnificent bastard, what have you done to me?" Kenji asked himself with a smile while wiping the sweat off his brow with a rather soft and fancy feeling handkerchief Lilly left on the floor, possibly as collateral for the scarf she took. He tried folding it up properly to put it in his shirt pocket when he discovered that the handkerchief in fact did not have any corners, just an elastic band and a pair of large holes.

"You're one bold broad, I'll give you that. But you won't get me that easily."

She did have a nice rack, though.

I like it, but please lose the honorifics.

THE HORROR

keep going, don't be shy

Escalator wrote:I like it, but please lose the honorifics.

Good catch. Fix'd for consistency.

Man...You suck for makeing Kenji likeable. Also DRUNK CRIPPLE SEX WOO WOO~

People should start using "you magnificent bastard" in everyday speech.

PharaohSauron wrote:People should start using "you magnificent bastard" in everyday speech.

My goal in life is to earn that as an epitaph. Or at least "Class-hole."

They didn't do anything though, even though the ending was WTF and I had that sudden urge to rush Katawa's production.

Xuan wrote:They didn't do anything though, even though the ending was WTF and I had that sudden urge to rush Katawa's production.

Who didn't do anything?

Lily and Kenji?

I guess you could say Lilly was
*puts on sunglasses*
...blind drunk.
"YEEEEEEEAAH!"

I know, horrible pun.

You have sparked my interest, please continue.