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Hey guys! Remember the magician? Well I decided to go further with the idea.

Thanks to Sharp-O, I most likely wouldn't have written this if he didn't lend a helping hand.

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Parts:

Part 1 (This Post)
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7

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Blurb:

A world of intrigue, tricks and magic. How far will Hisao follow the rabbit? Will he fall into wonderland? How many times is he going to have his wallet lifted off him?

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Characters:

Ayumu Koharu - The messy magician. If she hasn't got a deck of cards in her hand then she's making coins disappear, eating lunch or sleeping. Ayumu had a seizure when she was younger, it debilitated almost all of her motor functions. One year into her rehabilitation the doctors suggested learning sleight of hand tricks to increase the motion in her fingers, she took this to heart and is now considered Yamaku's sole magician.

Images: Rika Shiguma from Haganai: Sharp-o did that art for this one!

Aki Chiyo - Energetic and Lighthearted, spends most of her time flirting or winding up the brothers. She also works a part time job that she only got because she's missing a leg, because of that she's usually the one that's forced to buy dinner for everyone else.

Images: Chiho Sasaki from 'the devil is a part timer'

Arata "The thick one" Taichi - The younger brother. He's convinced that he can beat Ayumu's record for most wallets lifted in a year so he can usually be found in detention. Nobody but Shin knows why Arata's in Yamaku, it's a card he's kept very close to his chest.

Images: Kurenai ouji from 'Crimson Prince'

Shin "The big one" Taichi - The older brother. He's the rep of his class and usually the one to walk his brother to the principals office. Even before the brothers met Ayumu, Arata was a troublemaker. Because he was being shipped off to a far away school, his parents used their influence and a fair amount of cash to have Shin transferred to Yamaku as well.

Images: Jin Mitaka from 'Sakurasou no Pet'

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Magician's Tricks!

"Roll up, Roll up!" The girl stands proudly with a comically large cape almost drowning her small frame. "If you can figure out my trick, then you can win a prize!" She announces, challenging any passerby who dare try their luck, however, nobody seems to care. Feeling a small amount of empathy, I stride up to the counter.

"Hey there." She greets, removing her leg from the chair and placing both hands on the table, leaning forward ominously.

"Afternoon." I return. "So I just have to figure out your trick, right?" I confirm, temporarily dazzled by the rather adorable tiny magicians hat placed on top of her rather unkempt brunette head.

"100 yen each time you want to see it." She smirks, a smirk that says "challenge me, I dare you." without saying a word.

"Deal." I thumb around in my pocket and find a spare coin, placing it into her palm before taking a seat opposite her. As we sit, she withdraws a deck of cards from the top pocket of her vest and begins shuffling them.

"Marked deck?" I quip, hoping to figure out the problem before it's presented, instead she grins and hands me the cards. Flicking through them shows no sign of tampering, so I cut the deck myself a few times for good measure.

"Pick out any card you like and remember it." She grins, re-entering her "show" mode with a loud and clear voice and over the top motions. Two of hearts. She takes the rest of the deck and shuffles it before separating it into three piles before asking me to place my card atop any of the piles. I go for the rightmost, and she nods to herself before combining the three stacks into one again. While slowly flipping the cards out of her hand and onto the table, she strikes up a conversion.

"So you're new around here?"

"That I am, how could you tell?" I return.

"You looked lost." She shrugs, temporarily stopping to begin a new stack of face up cards, stopping on the eight of diamonds.

"Lost?" I mirror, hoping to find some explanation.

"Everyone here has looked like that as some point." She chuckles weakly.

"Well I'm glad to know I'm not alone, at least..." My voice trails off as I begin to re-concentrate on the cards, the next one flipped over is the two of hearts, my card.

"You don't have to worry about that here, there is bound to be somebody willing to be friends with you." She giggles, still flipping over cards after starting a third pile. "Unless that's your problem... not being able to make friends?" Her giggle turns slightly sour as she realizes that she could have stepped on a disability landmine.

"No, nothing like that." I assure her, raising my hands in an effort to increase the sincerity of my words. At this point she flips over each of the redundant piles and moves them back into a single deck again, rather strange.

"Guessed as much." She shrugs, a small strand of hair poking our of her head flicks about as her head bobbles slightly. "Alright, your card is..." She begins flipping out the cards, this time face down.

"the... t-w-o-o-f-h-e-a-r-t-s..." Each letter she flips down a card, and as she finishes spelling, flips out one last card, the two of hearts.

"Impressive." I give her a small round of applause as she leans back in her seat, waiting for my response. Luckily I'd had her figured out pretty early. "The eight of diamonds." I declare. "It was on the bottom of one of your three decks, so you placed it next to my card meaning you could find it when you started flipping cards face up." I lean back into my seat, now matching her grin with one of my own.

"Impressive." She mirrors, taking a hand to her chin in thought.

"So what's my prize?" I question, hoping that it's not a ten foot teddy bear that wont fit in my dorm or something.

"Hmm... how about some food?" She leans forward again, sending locks of stray hair bouncing around adorably. She's messy sure, but messy in that way that just looks right.

"Food?" My face contorts into confusion.

"Yep, since you're the first winner, it's my treat!" She stands proudly, shrugging off her magicians cape and making her way around the desk. "What should we get?" She interrogates me, now holding on to my right arm with both hands, gripping to my shirt.

"U-Uh... how about some Yakitori from class 1-2's stall?" I quickly recall seeing them grilling stuff earlier, that might be nice.

"Sounds great to me... um...?"

"Hisao. Hisao Nakai."

"Great, nice to meet you Nakai." She grins, now tugging me along behind her; I don't fail to notice how she failed to introduce herself either.

"You're still wearing the tiny hat, you know?" I goad.

"Am I? Good thing it's cute then." She turns her head slightly, only to show her mischievous wink.

---

"Motor skills, huh?" I mull those words over, now observing the girl attempting to pick at her chicken with shaky hands and an unsure grip.

"Mhmm." She nods before carefully placing the chicken into her mouth carefully. "Seizure did a number on my brain." She continues, her cheek full of grilled chicken. It's strange to hear someone be so... forward about their problems.

"I didn't notice it during the trick." I attempt to recall my memories, but remember nothing regarding her hands.

"That's because... repetitive motions, or so I'm told." She explains, moving her hands as if laying out cards on the table while still chomping down on her food. "What about you? What landed you here?" She asks the question I'd been dreading since the start of this conversation.

"I... Uh..." I stutter, before taking my breath and steeling my resolve. She told me hers, I have to tell her mine; besides, I have to get over this someday, might as well be today. "Arrhythmia... It's a heart condition." I force out the words through gritted teeth.

"That's a rough one." She shrugs before returning to her meal nonchalantly. "How'd you find out about it?" She asks the second question I'd been dreading.

"That's a story for another time." I chuckle, hoping that some effort to keep the mood high will help me somehow. I don't think I'm ready to let her know that just yet, I don't even know her name.

"Nooo! Hisao!~ now you got me interested!" She playfully punches me in the arm while complaining loudly, drawing the eyes of several passer bys.

"If you can figure out my trick, then you can win a prize!" I wave my arms wildly and do my best impression of this girl as I can, and as I do her face constricts into confusion, then laughter.

"Pahahahah! Ass!" She bursts into laughter and I find myself joining in. It feels slightly foreign to be smiling again, but nice at the same time. It's a nice feeling, a warm one that lodges itself right in your ventricular.

"Hey... are you doing anything tomorrow, after school?" I ask, almost out of nowhere, hoping that I'll have my answer before my nerves catch up.

"Hm? Why do you ask?" She retorts, a confused expression covering her face.

"Want to hang out some more?" I ask, my nerves slowly beginning to figure out the situation as she catches on and begins to think about it.

"I don't know..." She sighs as she checks her watch. "You already got your prize..." She turns to face me, her face locked into a serious expression.

"Oh, well..." I stutter, back-pedalling as hard as I can.

"Nah, I'm just kidding." Her facade breaks with a giggle and she pats me on the head. "That'd be sweet, Hisao."

"On one condition." I raise my hand, the other rested on my chest and measuring my now elevated heart rate. She tilts her head in question, so I continue.

"What's your name?"

I like her! She's a scamp Fantastic introduction to the character and very well written.

Nicely written and a well crafted character? Swampie you're a magician yourself. But yeah, nicely written and beautiful as a one shot. Though you wouldn't hear me complaining if it wasn't as you seem to contemplate yourself.

When I read the words 'she removed her leg' I immediately thought it was a prosthetic. I may be reading too many fics . I quite like this character. Would read a full fic with her if one was created.

I forgot to add this since I posted the chapter at like 1am, but the trick she shows if is real.

Watch the trick here.

Anyway, glad you guys enjoyed it!

I liked this alot. She seems like a very fun character. Looking forward to more.

"What's your name?" I ask, and she visibly shrinks into the collar of her uniform, instantly making me feel like I've trodden into territory that I shouldn't have. Each second passes by slowly until she finally breaks the silence.

"Ayumu Koharu" She whispers just quietly enough that I can't hear her.

"Huh?" I completely miss her name and have to ask again, I hate it when that happens.

"Ayumu Koharu" She murmurs her name once again, but I can't make it out over the din of the nearby festival goers.

"Sorry?" I ask again, any more and this will get awkward.

"Ayumu Koharu!" She announces loudly, almost blowing out my eardrums. "Yeah, it's a guys name and if you make fun of it then I'll be super mad!" She jumps to her feet and point a finger at me, a threat for my life.

"I won't make fun of it, I promise." I raise my palms towards her, hoping that my white flag of surrender will calm her down, luckily it does as her raised arm makes it's way back to her side before being quickly pulled up to her torso and crossed with her other arm.

"Good." She huffs before dropping back into her seated position.

"I like it, actually." I finally grab some words from the mess that is my brain and throw them out, causing her to smile for a fraction of a second before her face falls back into line.

"Good!" She turns her face away from me with both arms still crossed in front of her. Friendly then cold? That's some serious deretsun right there... like tsundere but backwards? Perhaps i'm putting to much thought into this and she just doesn't like talking about her name.

"I'll call you Koharu if that'd make you feel better?" I offer, once again hoping to defuse the tension now filling our little bubble. She turns to snap at me but stops herself, her face contorted into the expression better known as "Thinking."

"That'd be good, actually." She smiles a smile that warms my metaphorically cracked heart.

"Koharu it is then." I smile back, now feeling the slightly chilled air of the night crawling over me. We each sit in silence, simply enjoying the cooling atmosphere and quiet sounds of people enjoying a festival in the distance. It won't be long before the fireworks go off, I consider letting her know but decided it'll be funnier if she jumps at the sudden explosion.

"Want a drink?" I ask through my parched throat.

"That's one of the worst pick up lines I've ever heard, Hisao. Try better next time." She winks. Instead of finding a response, all I do is blush while I lift myself from my 'seat' in the grass. While making my way over to the stall that was selling coffee I carefully run through the events of the day.

First I woke up late, then Emi tried to force me onto her diet, I'm lucky I dodged that one. Now I think about it I'm surprised that the student council haven't been looking for me, maybe they're enjoying the festival as well? No, it's far more likely that they're cramped up doing paperwork or somesuch.

After I dodged Emi I visited Lilly's stall and she asked me to find Hanako, that lead me to the library where I found my violet acquaintance buried in a book. Rather than disturbing her I decided to leave her to the lunch box she was nibbling away at and just let Lilly know that she was doing okay.

After that was dealt with I ended up at Koharu's stall. It looked like she'd been sitting there all day given the various cans of coffee and energy drink scattered just out of sight, but I suppose that's what you get when you're the only person in Yamaku who can perform magic tricks, at least to my knowledge. Hopefully she hasn't burned out on coffee.

Now holding two warm, but cooler than i'd like, plastic cups of coffee I begin making my way back over to the tree we had taken for ourselves. Who exactly is this Ayumu Koharu? I haven't seen her anywhere in the time I've been here, and her style is not forgettable in the slightest... maybe she is magic, and was just invisible this whole time. Either way, she's sitting right in front of me now.

"One coffee, made specially for you." I hold out the cup towards the mess head of hair below me.

"Thanks." Her large eyes meet mine as her thanks leave her mouth.

"Huh." I sigh to myself as I reclaim my seat. "I thought you'd crack a joke."

"My mommy told me not to take drinks from strangers." She obliges, raising her voice an octave and tilting her head to the side, making her look like a lost child.

"Christ that makes me feel bad." I place a hand over my heart in mock pain.

"That's the point, silly." She smiles into her cup as she takes a sip. "This isn't the best coffee I've ever had." she admits, furrowing her brow.

"It's a little cold." I agree after taking my first sip. The flavor is there, even though it's obviously convenience store coffee bought in bulk, but the temperature ruins the whole cup.

"Ah well, can't let that ruin the festival." She sighs before leaning her head back and sipping at her drink.

"I don't think one bad drink could ruin a whole day, let alone a festival." I smirk, remembering the eclectic taste of acquaintances I've found in the short time I've been here.

"Well.... just be sure, I'll grab us something else." She speaks proudly before levering herself from the ground with help from the tree we'd been leaning on. "Got any change?" She offers an open palm, the question was more of a courtesy than an actual query.

"Sure." I silently curse my inability to hold onto my own money and quickly empty my pocket of shrapnel change into my hand before emptying my hand into hers.

"One coin?" She inspects her palm, now only holding a measly 100 yen coin.

"You must have dropped some." My gaze shifts to the ground only to find grass; no coins. Then I catch on. When my gaze has risen back to Koharu, I see that each of the fingers on her hand has a coin perched on it's tip, the rest gathered in a small pile in the center of her palm. "Fancy." I admit, amazed by this girls sleight of hand despite her problems.

How did she even manage that?

"Just don't let em' start the fireworks without me." She adds with a wink while closing her hand into a fist and collecting all the coins while turning on her heel and strutting away like a true Vegas stage performer, clearly proud of the trick she must not get to show people much unless they're shoveling change at her.

"How am I meant to do that?"

"Yahallo, Hicchan!" The small speaker in my phone almost blows out from the violently exploding sound.

"Hey mom." I sigh, still lamenting that nickname. It's nice to hear her so cheery again though, that's the person I remember, not the one that visited me in hospital. She started getting happier during the few days I spend in the house before moving out here, but she hadn't really recovered emotionally. Neither had I, really. 'Cheerful till the end' as dad would say.

"How are things for my widdle baby boy?" She continues, making my head feel heavier and heavier by the second.

"Things are fine here. How's it going back home?"

"Oh the usual, your father and I are working hard as always!" She sounds cheery, but it sounds incredibly forced at the end. It's not my tuition, most of that was covered by the school, actually, so at least I know she's not unhappy with me. Not like she'd show it if she were. My dad, on the other hand, would be letting me know the second I picked up the phone.

"I hope you're remembering to eat." I sigh, remembering the numerous, countless times that she and dad would trudge in at 1am and flop into bed without eating, hoping their breakfast would cover it. Maybe that's why I always eat so much breakfast?

"Of course, of course! So have you met any giiiirls yet?" She purrs, and I feel uncomfortable instantly.

"... I'll talk to you later, mom." I sigh, hoping to avoid that conversation until I truly figure out what Koharu and I really are.

"Nooooo!' Hicchan, you've gotta' let me know all the juicy details!" She continues her relentless assault. If we continue this defense then I'll surely fall, given time. The only way to get out of this with even a shred of confidence left is to surrender. Or perhaps is Seppuku?

"All seven of the people I consider friends are girls." I sigh, admitting defeat. I'm sure all of our neighbors will know about this before sundown.

"You're building a harem?~ Thata' boy!" She exclaims in excitement before moving the phone away from her face and shouting. Dad. Shit.

"Mom! Don't tell dad, he'll kill me." I exclaim, hoping that she heard it despite the phone being nowhere near her face. After a second of tense silence, she returns to the conversation.

"So who was the lucky gal' to accompany you to the festival then?"

"You know about the festival?"

"Mhmm! It was all over the website, you know." I can almost hear her permanent grin through the phone. Dad must have told her that, she's useless with any technology that isn't a phone or a microwave.

"Well I ended up wandering around with this girl after I figured out her magic trick." My words begin to flow freely as the used to on the one day a week that mom got home early and dedicated her to listening to my week's story. She was almost like a diary for me, in a way.

"You figured out her magic trick? Does that mean I've got grandchildren on the way?" I can hear her lean into the phone as she speaks.

"Mom! It was a card trick! Like... magic!" I exclaim as my face grows hotter at the mention of fornicating with someone that I've known for less than a day. Trust mom to bring up grandchildren; That must have been the first thing that she asked the doctors about when I wasn't in the room, knowing her. Her intentions are innocent, but the methods are not so innocent.

"Oooh, a magician, ehh?" She ponders.

"Don't you dare say anything about a 'magicians fingers!' or something." I sigh, predicting her move correctly as she inhales sharply.

"Awh... I've got to go Hicchan, but I'll be sure to let Jin know that you're doing well."

"Thanks, don't tell him about the 'harem' though! Love you, mom."

"We love you back, Hicchan!" She exclaims before the line goes silent, along with the room. Not for long though, as someone has begun pounding on my door and shouting.

"WHO'S GETTING KILLED?"

"What do you want, Kenji?" I call through the door, hoping to get him to leave without having to open my door.

"THEY'RE ATTACKING!" He screams, still banging on the door like it's a zombie apocalypse

"What?" I respond, utterly baffled as par for the course when talking to Kenji.

"Hisao, have they got you at gunpoint?" He whispers, as if the 'dangerous women holding me hostage' wouldn't hear him. I decide that the easiest way to get him to leave would be to show that I haven't been taken hostage by the feminist forces.

Lifting myself from my bed I begin walking over to the door, halfway expecting him to barrel through it. It'd probably go down too, it seems pretty flimsy. I've even considered kicking through Kenji's door just to see what he's got hidden in there, but decided against it in fear of psychological damage.

"Kenji." I call his name as I open the door, my voice dripping with venom. "What?"

"Woah, what's the the cold attitude all of a sudden man?" His fists drop from fighting position and swing idly by his sides. I take a deep sigh to calm my nerves, rubbing the bridge of my nose in the hope of feeling less angry.

"Is there anything you need, Kenji?"

"No man, I just thought you were getting attacked by feminists. Luckily you seem like the type of guy who can defend himself." He admits proudly, even though he's talking about me and not himself. I've have enough of this.

"Night' Kenji." I declare and swing the door shut, not stepping back until it clicks shut, then adding to the sound by swiftly turning the lock into the 'don't let Kenji in' position.

What an eventful ending to my night. Sigh.

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Author notes:

Parents! Hisao's mother is pretty much Misaki Kamiigusa, and his father... we'll get to know him eventually eventually.

A chapter that doesn't have our heroine in it? What is this sorcery?

Why did I break up part 2 and 3? Because I felt like it.

This is extremely entertaining. I'm in!

Good work and good luck with the rest, Swampie!

I'm liking what you've done so far, Swamp.

Hmm. It seems I forgot to comment on chapter one...
Rectifying that, the story is very good as expected from you.
Considering Hisao has known his mother all his life he seems pretty defenseless against her ways I do hope she won't be too prominent in your cast as she already gets on my nerves... Or maybe it's Hisao's defenselessness against her that gets on my nerves? With characters like her I always hope someone will tell them in no uncertain terms to shut the hell up and I'm disappointed when it doesn't happen^^°

Anyway, two grammar issues:

remembering the numerous, countless times that her and dad would trudge in

"she and dad"

It looked like she'd been sat there all day...
Either way, she's sat right in front of me now.

This one popped up twice, and I've seen it a few more times recently...
The verb "sit" can be used transitively and intransitively, but if you use it transitively the meaning changes to "someone made her sit there" (compare meaning 1 and 2 vs. meaning 10).
So every time I see this I wonder who sat her there...

I'm glad you guys are liking it so far!

Mirage_GSM wrote:Rectifying that, the story is very good as expected from you.

Thanks man!

Mirage_GSM wrote:Considering Hisao has known his mother all his life he seems pretty defenseless against her ways I do hope she won't be too prominent in your cast as she already gets on my nerves...

My way of thinking is that he's tried, many, many times but had no success. Either way, it'll most likely be an "inbetween" kinda thing where Hisao updates his mom every once in a while, plus I'll only be posting the important conversations, the others will just be mentioned.

Mirage_GSM wrote:This one popped up twice, and I've seen it a few more times recently...

I'll learn one of these days... Thanks for letting me know (again)

swampie2 wrote:

Mirage_GSM wrote:Considering Hisao has known his mother all his life he seems pretty defenseless against her ways I do hope she won't be too prominent in your cast as she already gets on my nerves...

My way of thinking is that he's tried, many, many times but had no success.

I wasn't suggesting that he should try to change his mother just...
Well, since he knows her, telling her that he has not one but seven female friends was not the brightest of moves...

It appears I have another fan fic that I need to subscribe to . Good luck with your future chapters .

"It's over... It's done..." Miki squeaks as Suzu carefully pats her head, as if to say 'there there, it's okay, Miki.' I release a stifled giggle at the married couple and begin my treacherous journey out of the classroom. Seeing both Misha and Shizune stand from their seats rather forcefully while staring me down only makes me walk faster.

"Hicchaaaaan!~" Misha waves as I begin to contemplate my excuse, luckily, I don't need one though, as a shining angel falls from heaven and lands at the door to class 3-3.

"Necktie, we've got stuff to do, remember?" Koharu states proudly to the dismay of the student council. Feeling a burst of confidence from Koharu's flashy entrance, I turn back to sweet and sour.

"Sorry ladies, I've got plans." I state, causing Misha's face to contort into interest, while Shizune seems about ready to grab my by my tie and interrogate me.

"Ooooh~ We wouldn't want to put your date off~" Misha purrs while grabbing Shizune by the collar and holding her back from tearing my arms off. I get the gist that she's actually trying to help me out this time.

"Thanks Misha, I'll help you out when I've got the time." I give a small bow and make my way towards my savior, the mysterious magician.

"We're gonna' go meet my buddies from second year." She explains while we walk.

"Second year?"

"Not many people in our year like me..." She trails off, this seems like a topic that I should avoid if possible. "These guys don't really care though, so they're cool." She sighs in relief.

"Hope they'll like me." I murmur, my social skills still haven't recovered from my time in the hospital.

"I'm sure they will." She pats me on the back heavily, causing me to wince. "Just be like you normally are."

"Hey, Koharu. Please don't do that again." I sigh, pointing to my chest and the dull throbbing coming from my heart. She seems confused for a second before her eyes open wide in shock.

"Ohmygod, are you okay?" She stops dead, now frozen solid.

"I'm fine, just try not to hit me in the chest." I smile, rubbing the back of my head. It's a shame I had to scare her like that.

"Man, now I feel bad." She extends her hand towards me, in it lies my wallet.

"You..." She lifted it off me while I was distracted...

"Yeah... sorry about that. That's part of the reason the third years don't get along with me much." She palms her face and sighs heavily.

"Well then you'll have to find a different method to peek in my wallet." I chuckle while pocketing my retrieved wallet. My joke wasn't too great, but it seems to have cheered her up a little bit.

---

"New meat!" The girl screams before rushing over and wrapping both arms around me. Taken by surprise, I almost fall over. Koharu quickly steps to our side and introduces us.

"This is Aki Chiyo, Aki, this is Hisao Nakai."

"Great to meecha'" She exclaims. "I hear you figured out one of Ayu's tricks, riiiight?~"

"I suppose I did, yeah." I giggle nervously, since she's still wrapped around me like a snake.

"You'll have to teach me that one." A male voice interrupts. "You can let go of him now." He sighs.

"Ah, Nakai, this is Shin Taichi." Koharu states.

"Or as we like to call him, Shin the big one." She winks, temporarily removing her face from my chest. I take the opportunity and place a hand on Aki's shoulder before giving her a light push off of me. She stumbles backwards a step, but still announces her reasoning proudly.

"The big one?" I question, looking back at him and catching a reflected ray of sunlight from his glasses.

"Right! 'Ta' means big or thick, and Ichi means 'one'!"

"I see..." I chuckle as I seat myself next to him on the bench.

"I'm guessing Arata's got detention again?" Koharu questions Shin as she seats herself.

"Correct. He tried to lift a purse off some girl and got called a pervert." He sighs, his face now held by the two fingers rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Arata is my brother, he's determined to beat Koharu's record of forty eight wallets in a year." He returns his gaze to me.

"Sounds like a character." I return as I consider my lack of lunch. "I'm gonna go grab something from a vending machine."

"We'll be waiting for you, you stud you!" Aki purrs as I stand, causing both Koharu and Shin to facepalm. That seems like a reoccurring theme with these guys. They seem eager enough to get to know me though, so I'm glad about that.

Aki seems like the overly energetic third of a love triangle in some manga, while Shin seems to be the 'straight man' who works out all the issues everyone has. But that still leaves Koharu without a space in the manga character scheme, as well as myself. I suppose I'm the 'transfer student' from the second season or something. Either way, my lunch is waiting for me in a vending machine somewhere, I've got to liberate it.

---

With the introduction of new characters, I'm going to be keeping a list of them in the OP so things don't get too confusing.