Re: A Painful Past (OC). Scene 2 is up.
Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 5:37 am
Huh, odd, I thought I did comment on this. Must have forgotten to click submit...
Anyway, the only thing I thought was strange was the amount of spacing out in this scene: Not only does your OC space out in the middle of his conversation with Akio, but apparently Akio spaces out at the same time and doesn't notice he has stopped walking until he is out of sight - which would take Akio longer than most.
They were just talking to each other, so this feels slightly off.
Anyway, the only thing I thought was strange was the amount of spacing out in this scene: Not only does your OC space out in the middle of his conversation with Akio, but apparently Akio spaces out at the same time and doesn't notice he has stopped walking until he is out of sight - which would take Akio longer than most.
They were just talking to each other, so this feels slightly off.