Tomorrow's Doom ~ Up: 04/30/16 ~ recommitted to completion.

[Minion of Chaos]

Another great chapter, man. Though I feel like Aiko seems more distant and detached in this chapter than others, which is perfectly fitting given what's coursing through her introspection and hypothetical situations (something I can relate to). It was a nice touch, if intended.

[Kyler Thatch]

I'm only at Chapter 19 at the moment (this has been the longest game of catch-up ever), but congratulations on being the first piece of fanfiction to invade my dreamspace. The details got away from me when I woke up, but I distinctly remember Amaya being in it. I really do wish I had more to tell than that, but you know how slippery dreams are.

[Helbereth]

Another great chapter, man. Though I feel like Aiko seems more distant and detached in this chapter than others, which is perfectly fitting given what's coursing through her introspection and hypothetical situations (something I can relate to). It was a nice touch, if intended.

A large part of what's going on in this is her being swept up with Yoko, so that's essentially the intent. She's being kept in the dark about some details, and the conversation with Yoko's father is largely just between father and daughter. That leaves Aiko to observe and internalize more than usual.

I'm only at Chapter 19 at the moment (this has been the longest game of catch-up ever), but congratulations on being the first piece of fanfiction to invade my dreamspace. The details got away from me when I woke up, but I distinctly remember Amaya being in it. I really do wish I had more to tell than that, but you know how slippery dreams are.

If it ever comes back to you, I'd like to hear what my devilish little pixie has been doing.

As for an update, I'm working out kinks still. That may be a more literal update than I intended, but since I just got my last wisdom tooth pulled this morning, I'm just gonna pass it off as a resulting from the Vicodin-induced haze.

[Riakai]

Phew.
Just copy-pasted this all into a notepad on my iPad to read on my way back home.
Hopefully 6 pure hours of nothing but reading'll let me catch up.
I'm on chapter 30a atm.
And I saw how big the chapters were.

WISH ME LUCK.

[Mournful3ch0]

WISH ME LUCK.

Best of luck. And make sure to keep prying eyes off of the coming pages... for reasons.
You may have some explaining to do.

[Helbereth]

Phew.
Just copy-pasted this all into a notepad on my iPad to read on my way back home.
Hopefully 6 pure hours of nothing but reading'll let me catch up.
I'm on chapter 30a atm.
And I saw how big the chapters were.

WISH ME LUCK.

Does the site not work on your iPad, or are you just predicting areas with no service?

WISH ME LUCK.

Best of luck. And make sure to keep prying eyes off of the coming pages... for reasons.
You may have some explaining to do.

Aww, but it'd be so much more fun if the 80-year-old Grandmother in the seat behind him happened to be reading over his shoulder right at the best parts...

[Riakai]

Phew.
Just copy-pasted this all into a notepad on my iPad to read on my way back home.
Hopefully 6 pure hours of nothing but reading'll let me catch up.
I'm on chapter 30a atm.
And I saw how big the chapters were.

WISH ME LUCK.

Does the site not work on your iPad, or are you just predicting areas with no service?

WISH ME LUCK.

Best of luck. And make sure to keep prying eyes off of the coming pages... for reasons.
You may have some explaining to do.

Aww, but it'd be so much more fun if the 80-year-old Grandmother in the seat behind him happened to be reading over his shoulder right at the best parts...

My iPad doesn't have 3g or anything like that, it's not on a Data Plan or anything.
And I made sure to. My aunt tried faking reading it, and I was like "WAT WTF NO GTFO MIEN BERK"

[Riakai]

Hisao is getting laid.

I would so kick his ass at Mario Cart...

There are only a few of them hiding among the anime, science fiction, action, and drama films, and they're all modern classics, but I seem to be dating a hopeless romantic, and, honestly, there might be one of those inside of me.

If not, there will be soon...

You do not understand the amount of rofl that ensued after I read these lines.

[Mournful3ch0]

Hisao is getting laid.

I would so kick his ass at Mario Cart...

There are only a few of them hiding among the anime, science fiction, action, and drama films, and they're all modern classics, but I seem to be dating a hopeless romantic, and, honestly, there might be one of those inside of me.

If not, there will be soon...

You do not understand the amount of rofl that ensued after I read these lines.

Ahh, too late. I hope our friend on the iPad read through that part before reading that. Heh. Or maybe I spoiled it.

We shall see.

[Helbereth]

Ahh, too late. I hope our friend on the iPad read through that part before reading that. Heh. Or maybe I spoiled it.

We shall see.

Considering he's the one who was reading on his iPad, I think we're in the clear.

[Kyler Thatch]

Okay. Finally. All caught up now. I'm glad you started breaking up the chapters into shorter posts. I think I may be able to endure longer reading sessions with the frequent rest stops in between. I'm kind of curious about where you decide to split the chapters, though. I notice that it doesn't always occur at a narrative break (or whatever the term is for a point where it feels natural to put the metaphorical book down and get a glass of water).

Re: Aiko's dream sequence, I half expected something resembling a Shadow Aiko to show up at some point. I'd say I've been playing too much Persona 4, but it's been months since I last touched the game.

Also, it was probably intentional, but you really had me confused as to whether the things that were happening were actually happening. So if that was the intended effect, then mission accomplished.

I can't believe she likes trashy visual novels

Hm... now I wonder what Yoko would think of a certain cripple porn game. Hypothetically speaking.

[Helbereth]

I'm kind of curious about where you decide to split the chapters, though. I notice that it doesn't always occur at a narrative break.

If you mean the separate parts within a chapter, those splits are based on word count. Each section of this last chapter was 2500-2800 words in length. It's just to prevent the pages from going on for too long, which, according to Silentcook, can break some browsers.

Also, it was probably intentional, but you really had me confused as to whether the things that were happening were actually happening. So if that was the intended effect, then mission accomplished.

Wholly intentional. All the previous dream sequences have been in italics to indicate as such, and I wanted the reader to think it was just the regular exposition starting. Going into it, the scene is so mundane that Aiko doesn't realize she's dreaming right away, though I did leave a few bread crumbs--her being unable to read the phone has more to do with it being a dream than her glasses being missing. Part of the plan was for Aiko and the reader to both start questioning reality at about the same time, which is why Hisao starts out being believable, but quickly goes OOC.

I can't believe she likes trashy visual novels

Hm... now I wonder what Yoko would think of a certain cripple porn game. Hypothetically speaking.

This was an intentional dig at the romance genre on the whole, actually. It's not my genre of choice, to put it mildly. That aside, I think Yoko would approach KS from a position of moderate offense, but would probably enjoy the read if she could get past the premise. Amaya would probably groan at the premise and decide to read it out of spite, enjoy it thoroughly, then deny having ever liked any part of it. Aiko, on the other hand, would probably laugh at anyone reading that crap, though she might secretly enjoy the hell out of it if she gave it a chance--especially the dirty parts.

Strange thought: Imagine if someone wrote Katawa Shoujo in the world of KS some years later, basing the story on their experience at a similar academy for disabled youths...? Talk about meta...

[bhtooefr]

I actually had half a mind to write something where Hanako was a KS writer (maybe even writing her own route), but decided that I'm not in the right position to do that.

I may have also tried to make it so Hanako was the artist of the infamous chocolate comic, but decided against that. Way too OOC.

[Sunburnt Vampire]

Just want to say I'm loving your story, found it late last night, just got up to date late tonight. Took a good deal of my day, but I regret nothing! Look forward to chapter 43, even if it takes a while I'm sure it will be worth it.

[Helbereth]

Just want to say I'm loving your story, found it late last night, just got up to date late tonight. Took a good deal of my day, but I regret nothing! Look forward to chapter 43, even if it takes a while I'm sure it will be worth it.

Well, thank you and welcome to the forums--seems you lurked for a couple weeks or so before commenting. Anyway, I'm still smashing my face on the keyboard trying to get this done, though lately I've been distracted with other activities--like smashing my feet, legs, buttocks, and other unnamed body parts on the keyboard.

Anyway, thanks for reading! And commenting, even... double whammy, that... I should probably go to bed since I'm starting to find myself funny.