I'm going to put portions of my own story here... However, it is not a tough story like a lot of people have mentioned here so far.
First things first: As Beoran knows (through IRC), I'm deaf and I've been that for as long as I can remember. But I'm not deaf in the same way Shizune is, as I have a very minimal residual hearing capabilities (though it is so minimal I literally can't hear thunderstorms or fireworks without hearing aids). I have a Cochlear Implant for almost 10 years now as well as a hearing aid on the other ear (directional hearing). In quiet surroundings I'm capable of understanding about 90% of the sentences in Dutch this way... But add in more noise and it goes significantly backwards to the point that it is hard to understand sentences. Or speak English and you’re almost guaranteed that I can’t understand what you are saying. That is why I have access to interpreters as well, paid for by the government. They’re not sign language interpreters though, I prefer interpreters from spoken to written text which allows me more choice in what I’m doing instead of having to focus on the interpreter all the time, as I can read back a small portion of the text already interpreted. It is one-way interpretation though, I can speak fine for myself in Dutch.
I’m currently at university doing Gametechnology (a derivate of Computer Sciences) and enjoying it so far, being capable of doing so as well. And that describes the majority of my life as it stands right now: I’m happy with how everything is going (aside from the government idiots, but that is a worldwide issue
). And as it stands now, I’m enjoying university much more than my previous schools due to two reasons: The first reason being that I’m enjoying what I’m actually studying and the other reason being that everyone is much more friendly and willing to talk with me. Maybe I’ve just matured in the right way, opening up more but to me it feels like everyone else on my faculty is more open to being friendly. Where I used to know multiple assholes on my previous schools I haven’t seen anyone at my faculty that I could consider being an asshole… Of course, the world is not as black and white as ‘friends and assholes’ but you get the idea.
But now my history: When I was young (from 3yo till 10yo or so), I was at a special school for children with language difficulties and hearing problems (not heavy hearing impairments though, how I got placed there though is interesting but not relevant here). Recounting the people I could consider friends, I wouldn’t be able to go past 5 friends in all my years there. The majority were neutral, I didn’t know them but they weren’t bullying me either. I barely got bullied either, as far as I can recall I had in those years less than five bullying incidents. However, the school was not really suited to my intellectual needs, I sometimes got work others didn’t have to do yet (which was annoying for me back then, feeling quite unfair but in hindsight I now know they were just trying to give me the education I needed at my level). That is why halfway I started going to a regular school for a day in the week. As high school got closer, in the penultimate year of primary school I started going more days in the week and the last year I fully transferred to the regular school. And again on that school I learned to know a handful of friends which I now never talk to anymore. One of them I could consider a good friend until we drifted apart on high school. But I got bullied more often on that school and that created anger, a lot of anger. It got so bad I sometimes lashed out quite badly. During playing, I accidentally tripped someone, which hurt his knee… I apologized for that but got harassed by one guy whom kept following me for several minutes, nagging all the time. The pent-up anger exploded and I didn’t think, lashing out badly and attempting to strangle him… Of course I didn’t seriously harm him but it scared them badly as well as the teacher and my parents. I have to mention that until the penultimate year I didn’t have any interpreters at and even in the last year I barely had any interpreters.
It wasn’t the only incident but it was the worst incident (in a couple other incidents I also lashed out badly but nothing as close as strangling). It didn’t end in the first couple years of high school, seeing as the majority were on the same school as I was (again a regular school). So as you probably can guess, I lashed out again a couple times. One time I had a pocket knife with me, which I seriously considered to use thinking that if I showed my bite was worse than my bark, they would back off… It sounds so naïve afterwards but that is what I really used to think. And because I had next to no friends while the bullies did, it was always my word against several others. It didn’t help that I was deaf which they used as an excuse, saying I heard/interpreted it incorrectly (I still think their actions were pretty clear). On a positive note, on high school I had practically every day an interpreter, in the first year mostly student interpreters though (there were barely any interpreters then so I took whatever I could). But at the end of the first year, I got a lot of request for a fixed single day in the week so I picked some and gave them a single day in the week. Some of them still are an interpreter for me at university, others took different assignments but almost every interpreter I had was a nice person, with exception of one stuck-up asshole that didn’t come 2 out of 3 assignments he got from me, neither times notifying me at all (that asshole isn’t getting any recommendations nor assignments from me).
Halfway high school we got moved to another school (nothing weird about it, it was just that the old high school didn’t offer the higher years, almost everyone in the same year got moved there) and I made a new friend, one that I can consider a quite good friend. I still am in contact with him regularly. Guess what, he’s a bit of a shy person (which is why I approached him, seeing that he didn’t have anyone he talked to on the introduction days) but we shared interests, mainly in gaming. A year later, a guy with a bit of Asperger Syndrome moved to my school, sharing my first name and being friends with both my friend and me. I talk less to him but I still do stay in touch with him. Also, because it was a bigger school and such, I had less problems with bullying. But of course there are the idiots standing in front of your locker and not wanting to move, to which I didn’t use a diplomatic approach. But those situations were rare and I never got in any trouble for that. I didn’t lash out badly anymore… And then I got my certificate for completing high school and got access to university (at this point I have to mention that the Dutch system for high school and beyond is split in 3 levels, a practical, a mixed and an academic preparation level on high school. I did the academic preparation level, all bullies as far as I know did either practical or mixed…). So there I am at university, studying Gametechnology, being with a group of students and reasonably good friends with at least half of them, one of them I’d consider a true friend.
Oh and if you wondered why I didn’t have friends from outside school, that was because due to my deafness I couldn’t be bothered to go to playgrounds and such having no good friends. Nor do I have any friends from the deaf community, because the one time I got introduced to them was a notoriously bad experience for me with another bully resulting in a fight… I do know a good friend with a hearing impairment though but I don’t have any ties to the deaf community at all nor do I feel any need to… Because of that and because of using interpreters that interpret to written text, not sign language interpreters I don’t have a good grasp on sign language (though I can read it reasonably well and grasp the meaning, my sign vocabulary is very limited). If I start getting in touch with the deaf community again, I’ll probably take sign language classes.
And recently Beoran recommended me to read Katawa Shoujo. It was my first VN (and so far the only VN I finished, the story actually compelling me to keep reading). I first did what I would do in the storyline, ending up with Emi and the awkward scenes. I then moved on to Shizune’s storyline and man, I can see similarities between her and me. Her need to manipulate people around her and the nagging, the stubborn attempts at understanding what is being said if Misha isn’t around to interpret, because she (and I) want to keep the control about what is happening (though she is more excessive in that). She doesn’t want to lose any information and does that by becoming in essence the Game Master in her surroundings. Using notes and other alternatives requires people to put effort into copying everything they’re (wanting to) saying, but people will summarize a lot, leaving out details, deciding on their own what is important and what not, or even saying that it wasn’t important anyway. I dislike that and I think Shizune does as well, refusing to use such alternatives unless forced to. It looks stubborn but using those alternatives removes a layer of interaction, the personality, the intonation. In sign language, the intonation of the voice is replaced by the expression of the signer. A piece of paper doesn't have the same possibilities.
Just yesterday morning, really around this time yesterday I went a walk since I was feeling depressed and wound up at my ex gf's house at 2am EST. I talked with her mom for some 3 hours, I felt SO happy after that convo... I even got to see my "Hanako" again. (Didn't want to wake her up so she never knew I even came to vists...)
And even then I still think you don't have the same possibilities on paper as with speaking/signing, unless you're watching their expression while they're writing (and so the study on handwriting analysis would be superfluous...