Re: Meet the Hakamichis –A USM Summer Series Updated 8/04
Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2014 10:49 am
Because when you get people together with a similar interest in a niche field, they’re gonna have a good time.
Even if the terrain is textbooks and cell phones.
Previous Chapter
Chapter Eight: Alternate Strategies
On a barren world on the spinward edge of the Eastern Fringe, a group of Eldar Rangers hunkered behind the ancient ruins of one of their ancient cities, built before humanity even learned to swing a bone like a club. Across the wasteland, a veteran squad of Imperial Guardsmen moved from cover to cover, attempting to bring their plasma guns to bear against the xeno foe. Another squad was attempting to flank the Rangers, but the eldar had spotted them. Bringing the humans into their sights, the Rangers opened fire on the flanking veterans.
“Son of a bitch,” Lynda grumbled, “It’s crap like this that put us on the endangered species list.”
Hisao looked down at the dice rolls of one’s and two’s, “Wow, that’s conscript level failure, right there.”
Lynda sighed and grabbed the dice, “I miss my Seers.”
After a particularly exhausting tutoring session, Hisao had recommended the two play a killteam game using the models they had bought in town. Fortunately Hisao had glue and snippers handy.
Finding a place to play had taken a bit more thinking, but, remembering her stepbrother’s dedication to the game, Lynda recommended the basement. Once they were down there, all it took was a card table, some books, and a couple plastic cups, and they had a viable, if somewhat small, game space.
The basement itself was full of boxes and shelves of boxes, and while some were labeled, most weren’t. Lynda had a suspicion that most of the unlabelled ones contained the possessions of the late Mrs. Hakamichi, but was unwilling to voice her suspicion. In the end it didn’t really matter; the two had a place to play each other using dice and overpriced plastic and metal models.
Communicating during the game was its own challenge, but the two had developed a pidgin of sorts composed of Japanese, English, and sign language. Fortunately, angry, incoherent nerd rage transcended all languages.
“So assault phase,” Lynda rolled her eyes, “Your turn. Come at me, bro.”
“If by ‘come at you’ you mean ‘Rapid Fire range’ then yes. Yes I will.”
“I hope your plasma vets blow themselves up.”
“They will,” Hisao stated, “It’s what they do.”
Hisao grabbed his tape measure and started moving the plasma veterans forward, out of the cover provided by one of the books so that some of them could take shelter behind a plastic cup. Once those actually holding one of the precious weapons was safely behind cover, Hisao quickly shuffled the remaining six soldiers and their powerfist armed sergeant out into the open. When that was done, he did the same with the other squad, though they were completely exposed, the cover of a cell phone only a few inches away.
“Shooting phase,” Hisao declared, “Melta vets are gonna run….”
Hisao rolled a single D6 and grumbled when it rolled a two; the cell phone was at least three inches away. Hisao carefully measured the movement of the Guardsmen, to get them as close as possible to the cup. The lasgun toting cannon fodder were in front of their meltagun armed fellows and their chainsword wielding sergeant. Having moved the flanking squad of veterans, Hisao turned to the other squad, whose plasma guns were poised to rip a killteam style volley of death upon their xenos foe.
“Firing plasma vets,” Hisao said, and, having declared his target, used the tape to confirm that the Rangers were in range.
All three Vets were within twelve inches, and Lynda sighed, “This is gonna hurt.”
“Hopefully,” Hisao stated.
The first plasma gun was equipped with killteam cheese, and fired two large blasts over the hunkered eldar squad. The first blast went wide, nearly vaporizing the melta vets, but the second blast was right on target. Half of the surviving eight Rangers were under the blast.
Fortunately the Rangers were Shrouded and Stealthed, and so as long as Lynda avoided rolling a one for cover saves, she was fine. The second plasma vet, however, cared nothing for cover, and easily blasted one of the Rangers to atomic oblivion. The third veteran blew himself up, as his weapon overheated in his hands.
Hisao sighed, “You know, the sad thing is that that’s still a net gain for me.”
Lynda nodded, “Lasguns?”
“My kingdom for an officer,” Hisao remarked.
None of the lasguns managed to down any of the eldar, and when Lynda asked if Hisao was going to declare an assault, he just chuckled and waved for her to go.
“Screw moving, time to return fire,” Lynda declared, “Thanks for recommending this, by the way.”
“I thought you were a bit stressed out lately,” Hisao said, grimacing as the xeno snipers ripped through his veterans, “this seemed the best way to help that didn’t screw with your meds.”
Lynda chuckled and nodded, “Your turn.”
“We’re at turn… three?”
Lynda nodded again as she grabbed her dice and set them aside, “You know if you assault me I’m fucked, right?”
Hisao smirked, “Maybe~. So, what do you think of Hakamichi Manor?”
Lynda smirked at the nickname and thought the question over while Hisao moved both veteran squads –what was left of them, anyway- closer to her precious eldar.
“Well, it’s certainly not boring,” Lynda declared, “I never knew such a large house could feel so crowded.”
“Getting cabin fever?” Hisao asked, “Melta vets are gonna shoot their melta guns and the Sergeant’s plasma pistol only.”
“Crap,” Lynda said, “And kinda. I mean I like it here –you guys are great, and Hideaki is… Hideaki, and Mr. Hakamichi… is he deliberately trying to be here as little as possible?”
Hisao nodded, “It’s his way of being supportive. Speaking of, it sounds like you need some space from this place. Wow, that was terrible.”
“That’s BS 3 for you,” Lynda stated, “and maybe. Guess I’m used to being a city girl; staying at a house all the time feels weird. Even if we are going into town, it just seems… off, somehow.”
“May I make a suggestion?” Hisao asked, “Besides die under the overwhelming firepower of the Imperium, I mean?”
Lynda nodded, “You gotta hit me first.”
“Go out on a date. Just you, Misha, and a nice, quiet restaurant in town. Also, plasma vets are firing.”
“Shame you didn’t have the points for shotguns.”
“Right, ‘cuz that woulda made the difference. Rolling to wound.”
“Ow, my fragile space elf bodies. Cover saves. That sounds like a good idea, actually. Gives us an excuse to dress up before we pull off our clothes.”
Hisao coughed and watched as the eldar evaded the searing pain of plasma fueled vengeance, “I can recommend a place, if you like. Assault phase, melta vets are charging.”
“Over watch, and fail your damn Pinning Test this time.”
“I’ll do my best,” Hisao quipped.
“What day would we go? And don’t forget your Fear test.”
“Friday? I’ll have to work on that. And I gave the sergeant Zealot, remember?”
“Right, forgot. One hit with Overwatch.”
“Armor save… crap. Poor Jenkins. Rolling charge distance… I’m an inch short, aren’t I?”
Lynda used her tape measure to check the distance between Hisao’s melta vets and her hunkered eldar.
“…Yeah, just shy.”
“Stupid Imperial system,” Hisao grumbled.
Lynda grinned, “Oh the irony. Oh, and thanks. For the advice and help, not for failing your charge like bitches. Although I appreciate that, too.”
Hisao nodded and ended his turn. Lynda was preparing to unload a volley of sniper rounds into the plasma vets when the basement door opened and Hideaki’s head appeared.
“Dinner’ll be ready in a couple minutes,” he declared.
“What did Mr. Hakamichi make?” Hisao asked.
“Takoyaki and grilled salmon,” Hideaki replied, “He said my tako-less takoyaki was an insult to the family name, and the only way to regain our lost honor was for me to wax the SUV. Twice.”
“Well, I liked it, for what that’s worth,” Lynda declared.
Hideaki nodded once and retreated, closing the door as he left.
Hisao looked at Lynda, “To be continued?”
Lynda nodded, “Sure. Although as soon as you get in Assault I’m fucked.”
“Maybe, but I gotta get there first. While we’re up there I’ll see what I can do about the restaurant.”
“You don’t have to go to any trouble,” Lynda said.
“I know this town,” Hisao retorted.
“…Fair point. Thanks.”
“No problem,” Hisao said, and headed for the door.
+++
Next Chapter
Because I’m so much better at writing date scenes than gaming scenes…
I’m not sure if that was sarcasm or not. That’s how far gone I am.
Ah well.
Even if the terrain is textbooks and cell phones.
Previous Chapter
Chapter Eight: Alternate Strategies
On a barren world on the spinward edge of the Eastern Fringe, a group of Eldar Rangers hunkered behind the ancient ruins of one of their ancient cities, built before humanity even learned to swing a bone like a club. Across the wasteland, a veteran squad of Imperial Guardsmen moved from cover to cover, attempting to bring their plasma guns to bear against the xeno foe. Another squad was attempting to flank the Rangers, but the eldar had spotted them. Bringing the humans into their sights, the Rangers opened fire on the flanking veterans.
“Son of a bitch,” Lynda grumbled, “It’s crap like this that put us on the endangered species list.”
Hisao looked down at the dice rolls of one’s and two’s, “Wow, that’s conscript level failure, right there.”
Lynda sighed and grabbed the dice, “I miss my Seers.”
After a particularly exhausting tutoring session, Hisao had recommended the two play a killteam game using the models they had bought in town. Fortunately Hisao had glue and snippers handy.
Finding a place to play had taken a bit more thinking, but, remembering her stepbrother’s dedication to the game, Lynda recommended the basement. Once they were down there, all it took was a card table, some books, and a couple plastic cups, and they had a viable, if somewhat small, game space.
The basement itself was full of boxes and shelves of boxes, and while some were labeled, most weren’t. Lynda had a suspicion that most of the unlabelled ones contained the possessions of the late Mrs. Hakamichi, but was unwilling to voice her suspicion. In the end it didn’t really matter; the two had a place to play each other using dice and overpriced plastic and metal models.
Communicating during the game was its own challenge, but the two had developed a pidgin of sorts composed of Japanese, English, and sign language. Fortunately, angry, incoherent nerd rage transcended all languages.
“So assault phase,” Lynda rolled her eyes, “Your turn. Come at me, bro.”
“If by ‘come at you’ you mean ‘Rapid Fire range’ then yes. Yes I will.”
“I hope your plasma vets blow themselves up.”
“They will,” Hisao stated, “It’s what they do.”
Hisao grabbed his tape measure and started moving the plasma veterans forward, out of the cover provided by one of the books so that some of them could take shelter behind a plastic cup. Once those actually holding one of the precious weapons was safely behind cover, Hisao quickly shuffled the remaining six soldiers and their powerfist armed sergeant out into the open. When that was done, he did the same with the other squad, though they were completely exposed, the cover of a cell phone only a few inches away.
“Shooting phase,” Hisao declared, “Melta vets are gonna run….”
Hisao rolled a single D6 and grumbled when it rolled a two; the cell phone was at least three inches away. Hisao carefully measured the movement of the Guardsmen, to get them as close as possible to the cup. The lasgun toting cannon fodder were in front of their meltagun armed fellows and their chainsword wielding sergeant. Having moved the flanking squad of veterans, Hisao turned to the other squad, whose plasma guns were poised to rip a killteam style volley of death upon their xenos foe.
“Firing plasma vets,” Hisao said, and, having declared his target, used the tape to confirm that the Rangers were in range.
All three Vets were within twelve inches, and Lynda sighed, “This is gonna hurt.”
“Hopefully,” Hisao stated.
The first plasma gun was equipped with killteam cheese, and fired two large blasts over the hunkered eldar squad. The first blast went wide, nearly vaporizing the melta vets, but the second blast was right on target. Half of the surviving eight Rangers were under the blast.
Fortunately the Rangers were Shrouded and Stealthed, and so as long as Lynda avoided rolling a one for cover saves, she was fine. The second plasma vet, however, cared nothing for cover, and easily blasted one of the Rangers to atomic oblivion. The third veteran blew himself up, as his weapon overheated in his hands.
Hisao sighed, “You know, the sad thing is that that’s still a net gain for me.”
Lynda nodded, “Lasguns?”
“My kingdom for an officer,” Hisao remarked.
None of the lasguns managed to down any of the eldar, and when Lynda asked if Hisao was going to declare an assault, he just chuckled and waved for her to go.
“Screw moving, time to return fire,” Lynda declared, “Thanks for recommending this, by the way.”
“I thought you were a bit stressed out lately,” Hisao said, grimacing as the xeno snipers ripped through his veterans, “this seemed the best way to help that didn’t screw with your meds.”
Lynda chuckled and nodded, “Your turn.”
“We’re at turn… three?”
Lynda nodded again as she grabbed her dice and set them aside, “You know if you assault me I’m fucked, right?”
Hisao smirked, “Maybe~. So, what do you think of Hakamichi Manor?”
Lynda smirked at the nickname and thought the question over while Hisao moved both veteran squads –what was left of them, anyway- closer to her precious eldar.
“Well, it’s certainly not boring,” Lynda declared, “I never knew such a large house could feel so crowded.”
“Getting cabin fever?” Hisao asked, “Melta vets are gonna shoot their melta guns and the Sergeant’s plasma pistol only.”
“Crap,” Lynda said, “And kinda. I mean I like it here –you guys are great, and Hideaki is… Hideaki, and Mr. Hakamichi… is he deliberately trying to be here as little as possible?”
Hisao nodded, “It’s his way of being supportive. Speaking of, it sounds like you need some space from this place. Wow, that was terrible.”
“That’s BS 3 for you,” Lynda stated, “and maybe. Guess I’m used to being a city girl; staying at a house all the time feels weird. Even if we are going into town, it just seems… off, somehow.”
“May I make a suggestion?” Hisao asked, “Besides die under the overwhelming firepower of the Imperium, I mean?”
Lynda nodded, “You gotta hit me first.”
“Go out on a date. Just you, Misha, and a nice, quiet restaurant in town. Also, plasma vets are firing.”
“Shame you didn’t have the points for shotguns.”
“Right, ‘cuz that woulda made the difference. Rolling to wound.”
“Ow, my fragile space elf bodies. Cover saves. That sounds like a good idea, actually. Gives us an excuse to dress up before we pull off our clothes.”
Hisao coughed and watched as the eldar evaded the searing pain of plasma fueled vengeance, “I can recommend a place, if you like. Assault phase, melta vets are charging.”
“Over watch, and fail your damn Pinning Test this time.”
“I’ll do my best,” Hisao quipped.
“What day would we go? And don’t forget your Fear test.”
“Friday? I’ll have to work on that. And I gave the sergeant Zealot, remember?”
“Right, forgot. One hit with Overwatch.”
“Armor save… crap. Poor Jenkins. Rolling charge distance… I’m an inch short, aren’t I?”
Lynda used her tape measure to check the distance between Hisao’s melta vets and her hunkered eldar.
“…Yeah, just shy.”
“Stupid Imperial system,” Hisao grumbled.
Lynda grinned, “Oh the irony. Oh, and thanks. For the advice and help, not for failing your charge like bitches. Although I appreciate that, too.”
Hisao nodded and ended his turn. Lynda was preparing to unload a volley of sniper rounds into the plasma vets when the basement door opened and Hideaki’s head appeared.
“Dinner’ll be ready in a couple minutes,” he declared.
“What did Mr. Hakamichi make?” Hisao asked.
“Takoyaki and grilled salmon,” Hideaki replied, “He said my tako-less takoyaki was an insult to the family name, and the only way to regain our lost honor was for me to wax the SUV. Twice.”
“Well, I liked it, for what that’s worth,” Lynda declared.
Hideaki nodded once and retreated, closing the door as he left.
Hisao looked at Lynda, “To be continued?”
Lynda nodded, “Sure. Although as soon as you get in Assault I’m fucked.”
“Maybe, but I gotta get there first. While we’re up there I’ll see what I can do about the restaurant.”
“You don’t have to go to any trouble,” Lynda said.
“I know this town,” Hisao retorted.
“…Fair point. Thanks.”
“No problem,” Hisao said, and headed for the door.
+++
Next Chapter
Because I’m so much better at writing date scenes than gaming scenes…
I’m not sure if that was sarcasm or not. That’s how far gone I am.
Ah well.
