Katawa Shoujo Forums

Raffyk wrote:We appreciate both the compliment and comment, but remind that we're not striving to have a plot based entirely focused on working around the Japanese system of drug laws and how to approach it, but merely something dedicated towards an inspiration from both the intricate and in our opinions well crafted plots of Breaking Bad and Katawa Shoujo. It's been great cowriting this fic with Dreamcastin', and I hope you'll give us a break and look at our work with an open mind

I'm enjoying the fic! Desperately suspending my disbelief!

brythain wrote:

Raffyk wrote:We appreciate both the compliment and comment, but remind that we're not striving to have a plot based entirely focused on working around the Japanese system of drug laws and how to approach it, but merely something dedicated towards an inspiration from both the intricate and in our opinions well crafted plots of Breaking Bad and Katawa Shoujo. It's been great cowriting this fic with Dreamcastin', and I hope you'll give us a break and look at our work with an open mind

I'm enjoying the fic! Desperately suspending my disbelief!

We're glad that you're enjoying what we are writing! We honestly appreciate it, and hearing that makes us love doing this that much more. Hope to see what you have to say when we get down to releasing the next chapter.

but merely something dedicated towards an inspiration from both the intricate and in our opinions well crafted plots of Breaking Bad and Katawa Shoujo

It's like taking a really nice stew and pouring it over some icecream. They're not exactly two great tastes that taste great together.

Both stories are heavily drama based, and require a strong level of believability to actually work. Right now, your story requires pretty much the same level of disbelief as a Bugs Bunny cartoon.

Chapter 6: It Can Be Done With A Bullet


I give a glance to my surroundings, taking it all in. At this point, Akira has been showing me around the lab a bit. She almost has a proud tone to her voice as she shows off every facet and gadget of my new workspace to me. It’s understandable Akira would be somewhat proud of this operation. I mean, it must be a nice feeling to know you’ve earned enough trust and prestige to have so much control over something like this. I wonder if I can ever have something to be this proud about in my future.

“Hey you paying attention? I’m not going to go over any of this over and over for you.”

“Oh what, sorry Akira. Just sort of organizing everything mentally. Anyways, what was that thing again?”

I ask about some sort of rack fitted with lights. Hopefully me asking questions assures her that she has my full attention. I guess I haven’t been paying as much attention as I should, but I feel comfortable enough with the lab that I could probably figure out most of the machines.

“So when are we actually going to get down to making our um, product?”

She gives me a response that’s tinged with an almost fierce tone.

“Be patient Hisao, this isn’t as simple as you think. This is a risky process that’s dangerous. Besides the fumes, do something wrong and it could even explode. You’ll be producing once it’s absolutely clear you can cook without error. Until then, we’re going to take our time to make sure you get to that point. You should be glad, not every day does a teenager get swept into something like this and be told to take his sweet time to learn his job. I wish I had that luxury.”

We continue on after her brief on how I will be getting into my role. It’s nothing as complicated as I would of thought it to be. We’re making methamphetamine. Most of the machinery had long names and wordy functions, but in reality it’s basic chemistry. I feel pretty confident about this, well at least confident enough that when we cook I won’t blow everything up.

“Alright Hisao, now that you’re up to speed with most of the lab tech, let’s show you where all the materials will be. I’m sure you’ll find this section of the tour easier.”

I shrug at her as we walk past the spacious area filled with the assortments of various equipment essential to meth-making. The building’s quite huge, almost on the terms of being a third larger than a normal gymnasium. It’s bright lighting and tall ceiling almost give off an open and welcoming feeling. Quite the opposite of it’s exterior, with hardly any windows and bleak bleached walls of concrete surrounded by thick shrubbery and trees. I'mguessing any of this was done on purpose. A discrete and non-glamorous sight would make perfect sense for a meth lab capable of spewing out enough product to supply half of the planet. Even the open and energetic feel of the interior made sense. I remember reading once that schools often would light up everything and use certain shades of paint to subconsciously give students a calming and productive feel to the atmosphere. Maybe when Akira’s father or whoever had been in charge of it's desgin thought it would be a good idea to do something similar for their brand new super lab. After all, who wouldn't want their lab to nearly scream productive.

While we’re discussing about which barrel to use during production, a loud buzz comes from one of Akira’s pocket. She turns away, quickly pressing a button to answer the incoming call from her cellphone.

“Hey I have to take this, just wait here. I shouldn’t be long,” she says as she opens a metal door into some sort of office.

Being alone with all of our supplies, I take in the bulk of it all. There’s shelf after shelf of containers filled with chemicals. and even a set of lockers next to another doorway. Turning away from the set of barrels we had been focused on, I head towards the set of lockers. At first it just seems like a normal set of lockers, with two holding a set of uniforms probably meant for wear during a cook. I nearly walk away, but I see two more lockers. Out of curiosity,I go to peak at if anything is even inside them. Some sort of metal objects fill both lockers, which at first I assume to be some sort of lab gear. For whatever reason, I decide to open one of them. Lab gear certainly isn’t what’s in them, but a whole cache of rifles. Lots of rifles. I didn’t want to sift through a locker in a meth lab filled with assault rifles, but if I could take any guess there had to be at least a dozen.

“Hisao? Where did you go,” she ask while walking out of the nearby office.

“Um Akira, what exactly is all of this?”

“Shit you weren’t really supposed to see these yet. I was hoping I didn’t have to explain this part so soon.”

“Why do we have all of these? I, I can’t do these kind of things.”

“It’s just a precaution Hisao. You’re a smart kid, you should understand that. It’s not like we’re in the safest business here. One day we might need these, for whatever reason that might be. I mean one day the police or god knows what is going to come through and break down these doors. We have to be ready to strike back immediately if the need be.”

I know I've realized that this isn't bright skies and easy sailing, but it somehow hits me yet again what I've gotten myself into. I shouldn't be surprised, hell I should expect guns to be in a meth lab, yet I still am. I guess I just sort of skipped over the part about having to pick up a gun and murder people when I thought about entering the business of producing meth. I guess I better forget that thought for now, and just focus on actually learning how to do this so I can get what I came for; getting paid.

“So, while we are on the subject, I suppose you don’t know how to shoot.”

I snap out of my thoughts, quickly trying to respond to her question

“I just need to step outside for a minute and clear my mind right now. This is an aspect I haven’t even thought of.”

I try to ignore everything that I pass on the way out, every machine that’s apart of this and every piece of gear just reminds me more of what I’m getting into. Finding the door, I manage to stumble outside before my mind gets even more jumbled.



After bursting out from inside the building, I look for a spot to sit down. I’m struck with all sorts of feelings and need a minute to catch my breath so to speak. Turning to the left side of the concrete building, I follow the blacktop surrounding the front until I come up to a small curb with a cherry blossom near by. It’s a fairly stereotypical calm scene, leaves blowing in the wind, a nice view of the cloudy sky. I quietly sit down. As if I needed a spot to clear my mind of anything, this spot seems like an optimal spot to do it.

I let out a deep breath while taking in the serenity. I feel conflicted in so many ways. I know I need the money and this is the one of the best solutions;but every time I notice all of the actions I might have to take in the future, I wonder is this really worth it. I mean, is it really worth paying for my treatment and medications if I have to give up my humanity along the way? There’s so much I guess I just haven’t considered. I saw a chance to make money and went for it. I've always considered myself to be a somewhat mature person, but damn, meth making. It’s almost funny, I’m thinking about all of this like I still have a choice. It’s too late to back out, besides the fact that I’m in this deep enough to be killed if I even suggested I want out. I don’t have any other ways to make the money either. I can worry as much as I want now, but the fact is this is the path I have chosen. I can’t say it’s the best one for me, hell is any path the best option really? I might as well live with my choice now. Maybe that’s a large part about being more of an adult, living with your choices, no matter how great or terrible those choices are. God this eighteen years old thing sucks.

I slowly get up from my new-found curb of thought, and turn for the way back in. I’m sure if I could see my face, it would have a new look of it. Whether it be one of some sort of new found determination twinkling in my eyes, or a more permanent look of gloom then I already have I can’t say for sure.

After entering back into the lab, I see Akira writing away at a clipboard with a few papers attached. She turns to me after hearing the door shut behind me.

“You okay kid? Not gonna have a bitch fit on me or something are you?”

“No nothing like that, just well sort of thinking.”

“I can probably guess what about. Look, I’d love to chat about your probable feelings of uncertainty, but the faster we teach you to cook the faster you get paid.”

I sigh at her straight forward response. Instead of going with her to handle the rest of our business I simply lean against one of the vats. I almost expect her to say something to try and get me back to it, but she just walks over and leans next to me. Akira lets out a doubtful sigh much like mine.

“You know Hisao, I understand what you’re feeling right now. I understand it almost all too well.”

“Why do you do all of this Akira?”

“To be honest, I’m not entirely sure. Maybe for power, maybe for a little fun, hell maybe I just want to impress my dad. It doesn't matter Hisao. It doesn't matter why either of us are here. They must both be some pretty damn good reasons if we’re both here, reduced to this. What I’m trying to say here is, I guess don’t worry about it so much. You’re a smart kid, it would make sense for you to be scuffling at this. There’s nothing you can do about it now though, just suck it up and push on. I know I've seen your brighter side, and I've certainly heard about it from my sister and even more so from Mutou. I doubt something like the reality that you've become a drug chemist has drowned all of that out."

I playfully roll my eyes at the bit of dark humour she let’s out near the end of her “don’t think about how much your life sucks and get back to work” speech. To be honest I hadn't even thought about Akira’s thoughts that much, let alone something like if she ever feels doubtful about any of this like me. I feel like an ass, she probably has it worse then me;being the daughter of the kingpin of this whole thing. I chose to get involved with this,but she’s been apart of things like this her whole life most likely. Jeez, who would of thought becoming a meth cook would be dramatic with life lessons about growing up and understanding others sprinkled in.

I give off a cocky smile as I reply to her.

“So when do I get to learn how to shoot one of those?”

She punches me in the shoulder at my sudden change of attitude. We both walk back towards the lab’s chemical supply. She points to one of the lockers with a cooking uniform and gas mask.

I give a nod as we take turns changing into our lab gear. We both look like full fledged meth cooks with our orange one pieces and gas masks. Part of me almost wants to say ,”Let’s get to cooking”. Thankfully I keep that last bit to myself as we get started.


The hours of learning how to make meth go by fairly quickly. I would of never imagined it, but all those chemistry lessons with Mutou make this pretty easy. It might sound cliche, but it’s really just basic chemistry. We don’t even have to worry about that trademark cat piss scent that follows the making of meth, the building is decked out with the best of ventilation and our safety gear takes care of the rest. At the end of the day, it’s just Akira, me, and the meth. We've accomplished quite a bit, getting the chemistry part down and we’re good to go on how to apply the recipe to the machines for production.

“So when do we bust out the bulk and get to the real production?”

“Glad to see the work ethic, but one day at a time Hisao. It’ll be sunset soon, let’s pack this up so it can get shipped and made sure it’s in accordance to my father’s expectations. After that we can get you back to your dorm.”

“Sounds good to me Akira.”

After a minute of fitting the meth into a large sealable bag, we quickly change back into our clothes and close up shop so to speak. It doesn't take long before we’re already driving back towards the dorm.



It’s a quiet drive back to the dorm. It’s been a long day, and I’m sure Akira wants to get home as much as I do. Once we arrive, it’s not much more than a simple goodbye as I get out of the car. Just as I start walking away, Akira calls out to me.

“Hey Hisao, hold on. I want you to know something. Don’t let all of this change you. That’s what’s really wrong with all of this. You do it for one reason or the other, a way out to solve a problem. But then it just absorbs you, and melts you into something else. Before you know it, you’ll be like me, head way below the water. If you ever want to walk out of this and be able to say it was worth it, make sure you stay who you are as much as possible. This world doesn’t need anymore monsters.”

“I’ll be fine Akira.”

My half-assed response seems suffice for her as closes the door and drives off. What she was saying does make a lot of sense though. There’s no point in me doing this to pay for medication that keeps me alive if I lose who I am to do it. Will I really be fine? Hopefully I’ll remember this if it ever comes to that.

It’s a quick walk to the dorm as I pass Rin’s mural and into the quiet hallway of where I live. Thankfully Kenji isn’t about, the last thing I need today is more feminist conspiracies. More silence as I open the door to my room. I’m almost not used to the lack of noise as I sit down on my bed with the lights off. It’s almost peaceful, within a few minutes I’m falling alsee-

The loud ringing of my cellphone jolts me awake. I should of known to trust silence, I doubt I will ever know true peace and quietness at this point. I take my phone out of my pocket, and with a slight yawn answer the call.

“Hello?”

“Evening, Nakai,”an authoritative voice with some sort of obvious voice modulation answers me back.

“Um who’s this, if you don’t mind me asking.”

“I don’t have time for small talk. Let’s make something abundantly clear. You belong to me now. If it wasn’t for my daughters I would have you chained to that very building. Be grateful you get to receive any payment at all. There’s no more of what you want. You feel like backing out, then it can be done with a bullet. What you do for me is now your top priority. Forget school, friends, or even your parents. If you’re told to produce, you’ll do it. If you’re commanded to do anything, you’ll do it. Don’t and I’m sure you can understand the lack of life you’ll have soon after. I have eyes everywhere Nakai, remember that. Enjoy the last evening of your former life.”

I slump against the wall on my bed. I’m quite nearly speechless. Someone speaking like that had to be Lilly's father. I know I’ve been mentally slapped every time I see the real life parts of this and should be used to it by now;but yet after it just happened again I’m still frozen in my tracks. There’s no escaping that fact now; whatever my life was is over now. I want to be optimistic and see this as some sort of turning point in the transition of boy to man, but I can’t seem to peg that perspective on the fact that I’m a human pawn now. I’ll just have to be like every person to have existed and procrastinate life’s issues into tomorrow. Me losing out on sleep isn’t going to change anything.

With one final sigh, I force myself into drifting to sleep.

Well, I'm loving the Fic, I cannot wait to see how faithfully you play to both the BB and KS Source Material. (I can see it now: Hisao Nakai, meth-slinging kingpin who literally wouldn't survive the first guy who calls him on his [censored].)
Regardless, I can't wait to see how this progresses.

Secondly, I dunno if this is your plan, but I do think it would be a very... Interesting, to say the least, implication should Hisao decide to pursue Lilly. Kind of like a royal 'F***k you!' to her Dad. Bonus points for, if Hisao's already adopted a 'Heisenberg' persona, when Mr. Satou calls him on it. ("I'm sorry, Mister Satou, but if you think you can take me down, I have news for you: I can harm you just as easily as you can harm me! Your daughter literally will not see it coming!")

Good show, can't wait for the next one.

Thanks for the feedback! RaffyK and I are working as hard as we can on the next chapter.

Hey everyone, we're working on the next chapter. Just to check in, we should be getting on a more regular schedule with posting. Please stay tuned, we have a great deal planned ahead.

Final note yay: Hey everyone, it may not seem like it at the moment but this fiction is apart of a route and is also it’s own route. Never fear if your crack fic detectors are going off, hopefully in the next few chapters both Hisao will have some time to deal with the normal parts of his life at Yamako. This should include some normal route plots and our own added takes combined to allow our own route to naturally grow into itself. So if there is anything I might ask for compensation of this it shall be you, the reader’s patience.- Raffyk

Chapter 7: Around the Block

I slowly awake to yet again, someone rapping at my door intensely. Oh crap, I forgot about Emi.

“Hisao, the Nurse needs to see you. It’s very important, you can’t avoid him this time.”

I walk over to my door and unlatch the lock. I slowly open the door to see Emi giving me a death stare.

“Alright, alright. I’ll head there in a few.”

“Don’t skip it Hisao.”

“Got it.”

And with that I close my door. I stand in front of my sink and splash some water on my face. I barely slept at all last night. All I could think about was Mr.Satou’s chilling statement. You feel like backing out, then it can be done with a bullet. Those words came from him cold and serious.

I walk over to my dresser and knock back my pills. As I go to open my door, my phone goes off. I answer it but say nothing.

“Hisao, it’s Akira. I heard what my father said to you last night and I feel compelled to give you an apology. What he said was way too blunt. In apology I have arranged something for you, so meet me at the gates at noon.”

“I’ll be there.”

I flip my phone closed. What could that mean. A gift, maybe.

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I walk to the Nurse’s office in a distracted pace at best. After nearly bumping into his door upon arrival, I give a shake to try to clear my thoughts.

“Hisao! They’re you are, I was wondering when you would get here. I guess important isn't clear enough?”

I nervously smile at him, trying my best to seem honestly embarrassed.

“Well, I've just just been um busy. School and all can get pretty overwhelming.”

“At this time of the year? You never seem to have trouble even around exams.”

Crap, his usual suspicious wink and questions already are starting to scan me. All though how with things have been, he’s probably think I’m just confused about a girl or something. He’s not a fool to think that though, it seems like girls are always confusing me, meth making not included.

I give him a sigh and nearly carefree shrug. Thankfully prying doesn't seem to be on his agenda today, so he simply shrug back at me before going to the corner of the office for our usual checkups.

“Well, your blood pressure seems to be a bit higher Hisao. It’s nothing serious yet, but I’m going to have to watch that. I don’t know if you being busy is giving you stress, but it’s crucial we keep that down for your heart. I’d like to avoid throwing more pills at you after all.”

I give the usual nod and smile, acting like what he is talking about is important. I almost wish I could bark out that maybe being abandoned by your parents and becoming a meth-making slave in disguise might be the least bit stressful. But I guess the whole point of what I am doing is to keep myself alive and try to hold onto whatever my life was. With what Akira’s father said, I wouldn't be surprised if the Nurse was just another pawn in place to torture me further.

I nod my head and say “Is that all?”

The Nurse nods back and says “Take it easy Hisao.”

After walking out from the Nurse’s office I peer at my watch. It’s about noon, so I head towards the gates.

I see Akira standing near a Lancer Evo. I wonder what she has to show me considering the sight. Funny, I thought she drove an Audi.

I walk up to Akira, who quickly notices me coming towards her.

“Hey Hisao! I told you I had a something for you right? Well check this out.”

She throws a pair of keys to me. I awkwardly manage to catch them. Looking down in my hands I can see they belong to the Evo.

“Keys? What’s the big deal about keys Akira.”

“For a smart kid you would think it would be obvious. Hisao, what do you use car keys for?”

I stare at her for a moment, pondering the simple question.

“Ohhh, wait seriously? Are you giving me that car?”

“Why indeed I am. It’s all yours now.”

“Wow, um thanks Akira. That’s awesome, but I don’t have a license or anything. With what we do aside, I’m not sure breaking the law anymore is a good idea.”

“Oh please, what do you think I am? I already have you covered.”

She hands me a freshly new licence, it’s laminate gleaming brilliantly with my picture occupying it. It’s no cheap fake, this thing could probably be run through the system and still verify. I guess my ability to drive is important to the business if it means such an expense like pulling a license out of thin air and supplying me a car.

I pocket the keys and license. Turning back for class, Akira grabs me by the shoulder.

“What’s wrong? Is it not good enough for you Hisao?”

I laugh nervously, avoiding eye contact at first. With my mind so busy even I forgot the most important part about having a car; driving it.

“Well um, you see Akira, I can’t-”

“You can’t drive kid?”

I continue looking down as she laughs at my lack of driving skills.

“Hey don’t worry about it, it’s not that big a deal. You’re a pretty busy guy, I’m sure driving has been the last thing on your mind. Why don’t I just show you how? Yeah, how about that. I already have been showing you everything, maybe it’s time for some everyday life teaching.”

I look up at he with a little less of an embarrassed look. She smiles at me; she has a burning look of determination in her eyes. She almost seems larger than life with her pocketed hands and fierce gaze. I’m a little thankful that my crime mentor and driver instructor is at at least the opposite of reluctant to helping me.

“Let’s teach you to drive Hisao.”

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After unlocking and getting into the driver seat, I stare at the interior to the Evo. It’s not like I've never been in a car before, but only until now have I actually payed attention to the actual sections of operation. I feel even more embarrassed as I realize that almost none of this I’m comprehending.

Akira immediately notices how lost I am. Pointing at the side of the steering wheel, she smiles calmly.

“It’s fine Hisao, television might make it look easy but even then it’s not as bad as you think. First put the key in the ignition, and turn it all the way to the right.”

Inserting the key, I give it a small turn. The engine responds within seconds and the car roars to life. The vibrations throughout the seats almost surprise me. So this is what it feels like to be in control.

“Now I’m sure you get the basic principles of how a car works, you move and turn the wheel to direct it. Now to do that, just put it into that gear by moving this and press your foot all the way down on that pedal, that’s the brake by the way.”

I feel the car struggle to stay in place as I press the brake, and the lurch as I switch gears almost startles me.

Akira grabs the wheel from the passenger seat, showing me to just focus on the pedals while she worries about navigation for now.

“Now, since we don’t want to kill anyone with your newbie driving, I’ll get us to an abandoned part of town while you make sure to get the hang of the brake and gas pedals.

As I release on one pedal and press the other, I feel the power of the car start to take shape. As I slowly put more pressure and release, we start to move forward until we get to a decent speed. It’s empowering to see objects move by so quickly because of my own doing.

Akira confidently handles turning the wheel as we continue on the quiet road, she doesn't even worry about the fact that I could floor it or break suddenly. She’s really got the instincts that someone needs for the business we’re apart of.

We come up to an empty looking part of town, with lawns that need cutting and windows that are boarded up. It’s a fairly empty part of town, with economic struggle and the need to move allowing a few blocks to be private. At least if we crash the car it will be into an empty house and not a kid playing ball.

After showing me some use of accessories, among other car functions we finally graduate me to handling the wheel. It’s really not as bad as I would of imagined it to be, even breaking and turning quickly seem to be in my reach. Too bad I make meth now, I might of had a chance racing instead.



After a couple hours, we've been driving around trying out all sorts of driving formations. From parking to turning Akira patiently shows me. After enough time has passed, I decide to drive Akira home. For once I feel proud of myself, I’m a fully fledged eighteen year-old with a car who can drive.

As I turn down a road filled with abandoned homes, the setting sun blasts rays across the blacktop. Shadows dance across the lawns as the car moves forward. Something moves in the corner of my eye, more so than any moving shadow. I stop the car abruptly.

Looking at one small house near the end of the street, I see a young girl quickly dart in. Her panicked pace evokes no question when I see two large men come from around the corner and see the open door. They carry two knives and a pair of sinister smiles as they look for the girl. Seeing a door in the house slightly ajar, they slowly walk forwards from the curb as they investigate.

I stop the car, and stare intently at the house. I look at Akira. She stares back with a questioning gaze. I silently stare back at the house, gripping the steering wheel tightly. Gritting my teeth, I press the gas pedal harshly.

“Let’s just go,” I mumble.

As we speed away, Akira stares at the house. I feel her glance at me as I keep my attention focused solely forward. I silently will myself into avoiding both looking back and at her.

I’d rather just forget.

“You okay kid?”

“I’m fine.”

“You don’t look like it.”

“Whatever.”

“Where are we going?”

“I don’t know, home I guess.”

“My place isn't that close, just let me off over there. I’ll call a cab or something.”

I immediately pull over to a lonely bench near a park. While reaching for the door handle Akira stares reluctantly at me. I can tell she thinks that I want to talk to her about it, that maybe she thinks I trust her with all of my feelings or something. That worried look says it all. She’s wrong if she thinks that way. All we are is partners in business, teacher and student, right?

“I get it if you need some alone time.”

I break the tense atmosphere by flashing a fake smile.

“Oh I’m fine Akira, just ready to get back to the dorm. Just call me once you’re ready for our next job.”

Her instincts must be keen because she certainly doesn't drop the expression she’s wearing. I’m not for her to worry about, as long as I get the job done what does she have to worry about.

“I don’t know if you trust me or not Hisao, but give me some credit kid. If there’s anyone you can trust, you would think it would be the person who’s been your partner through all of this. Not just that, I consider you a friend Hisao. I know you would have my back and even my sister’s.

I maintain my fake look of laxness, but it almost shocks me when she says that. I can’t deny that I feel a bit close with her, but she actually thinks of me as a friend? I thought maybe she was just trying to be nice because we’ll be working together so much, but the fact that she might have some sort of emotional connection to me feels a little surprising. Nonetheless, this is my problem. I’d rather just avoid having to deal with all my problems and another person’s feelings. Typical me, better to suffer alone than deal with confrontation.

“No really Akira, I’m fine. I appreciate that though, calling me your friend. I’ll see you later.”

“Stop, before you go Hisao, I wanted to give you this.”

She reaches into her suit pocket, pulling out a small piece of paper. She hands it to me folded. I almost assume it’s some sort of number for a therapist or something. Avoiding problems is one thing for me, but I’m not about to turn meth cook crying his problems to some guy who only wants my money.

“That’s my number Hisao, my personal number. Work may be one thing, but if you ever just want to talk call me on that.You could always talk to Lilly sometime too if you wanted. I’m serious about that Hisao, you’re not just a coworker to me.

I take the slip with a casual smile, nodding my head in thanks.

“Well um thanks I guess, maybe I’ll call you at some point.”

After I take her number, she gets out and waves me off slowly as I reach over and shut her door. As I drive away, I almost smile while looking in the rear-view mirror. How odd she looks in that suit standing with such a straight posture waving to me with a serious face.

“Friends or not, you’ll always seem like a businesswoman to me Akira,” I quietly mumble.

It’s a quiet drive home full of me trying to suppress my feelings after that.

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I manage to park the Lancer nearby, silently getting out and making my way to the dorm. At this point I’m fairly tired and my thoughts seem to be drawing more blanks as time goes on.

After a quiet few minutes of walking,I walk up to the front door and enter. Thankfully excluding Kenji, most of the other guys in the dorm are in the common room. It seems most are talking and just generally socializing. The noisy environment seems like a nice place to hide my thoughts, so I pull up a chair and just stare at the TV.

One person noticing it switched to a music channel, picks up the remote and switches it to the news. I’m not even paying attention to this until I hear the first thing that comes up on the news.

“A young girl has been found brutally raped and stabbed three times in the heart today in one of the abandoned house in Akita. It is currently unknown who the victim is, or even who might of performed such things to her. With lack of witnesses or forensic evidence it’s very likely that this crime will be easily solved, let alone discovering the identity of the girl. If you have any information ple-”

I instantly turn off the television after hearing the fate of the girl that I watched trying to escape. Ignoring the complaint from one of my dorm mates, I get up and rush to my room.

I know it wasn't my problem to be involved with and the situation was too risky for me and Akira to handle safely, but I still feel this pit of guilt within myself. I should be brutal and uncaring, that this girl’s life should mean nothing to me, but it does mean something to me. I allowed another human being to suffer and die because I was more concerned about myself. Forget being a meth chemist, I’m a monster is what I am.

I fall back on my bed, trying not to almost vomit from what I feel. I almost wish selling my soul for money meant selling my conscience as well. I don’t know what’s worse, being responsible for the death of someone or having to live and pretend everything is normal amongst everyone along side that fact.

I wonder if Lilly’s father will call in with his perfect timing to harass me with the most venomous of words. I could imagine he would do something as twisted as set this whole thing up to further stab at my sanity.

His call never comes though, I’m just left to my confused thoughts and staring up at the ceiling in silence.

I take out my phone and the paper with the keys and toss them onto my desk. Turning my head towards them I stare at the white folded paper. I wonder if I’ll ever take Akira up on that call she offered me. Even monsters need friends they can actually trust I guess. I’m not sure if I can trust Akira though, whether she performs with me or not. She is her father’s daughter after all, a crime boss's daughter that is a criminal herself. I have no way of knowing if she really wants anything to do with me or if she’s simply doing what her father is asking of her. For all I know she could be trying to get close to me just to control me and understand my weaknesses. It wouldn't be a stupid idea, it would surely allow her father to have an even greater upper hand on me.

I sigh when I think about the girl running into that house again. She tried to escape whatever life she was involved with and look at what it got her. Raped and then stabbed in the heart. I wonder if that’s all my life will be, me dealing with all of this and only left to have a heart attack when I try to get away. As dark as that may sound, I think I’d rather take my heart giving out then whatever Lilly's father would do to me if I tried to escape from this.

“Hisao Nakai, the monster of a meth chemist with a conscience.”

I sigh at my statement. If that’s really true then it’s no wonder Lilly’s father sees me for what he does.

I can only hope my usual luck with girl troubles gives me mercy tomorrow, as I have this feeling my meth related activities won’t be getting any calmer. Although I’d probably trade girl troubles with an angry or concerned Akira. At least with one I have less chances of getting shot.

I glumly turn over in bed, trying my best to get comfortable. I’m too tired to continue thinking about all of this. Sleep comes easily as I close my eyes.

Never fear if your crack fic detectors are going off, hopefully in the next few chapters both Hisao will have some time to deal with the normal parts of his life at Yamako.

You say that, yet every chapter is more crackfic-like than the last^^°