Katawa Shoujo Forums

lolawesome wrote:Meanwhile, Aura is seducing Hanako ...

Who's the person who keeps spoiling the Director's Cut?!

Yeah, Brogurt, stop spoiling it

Chapter Five- Across the World
I wave Emi off as we depart to our dorms. Somehow she's been able to hold back her energy until now and she sprints faster on those legs than most would with regular.
Walking back to the boy's dorms I realise that I've spent quite a long time hanging with Emi; the sun has moved quite a bit. Like earlier said, it doesn't really matter. I'm on a break, I should have fun.
As I walk through the corridors of the dorm building I can barely hear a sound. That makes sense, since most people left in the last few days, and even those who're still here are probably out enjoying the weather. Can't blame them, I did the same thing myself until just a few minutes ago.
Upon entering my room I feel that something isn't right, like things aren't lying where they were when I left. Someone's been in my room. I start looking around to see if anything's missing, but everything's there, things just aren't where I left them. Then I open my desk drawer.
A letter.
Who would break into my room, put things around and leave a letter? I guess I'll see. Curiosity fills me as I grab the envelope and open it. The paper inside is easily dragged out and unfolded.
”Dear Hisao

When you're reading this, I am (assuming Shizune does her job right) already in Scotland.”
Lilly? She wrote this before she left?
…
She made Shizune break into my room?!
I sigh and continue reading.


”Dear Hisao

When you're reading this, I am (assuming Shizune does her job right) already in Scotland.
I know this might seem strange, but I have to do this. I know I've always locked my thoughts inside and I know that I would just get scared if I tried to say this to you face-to-face, so here I am, telling my sister to write my (former, I guess you would say) boyfriend a letter.
I'm sorry for doing this to you and Hanako, it's a decision I hate making, but now it's come to this and I can't change it any more. If you're reading this it means that you didn't stop me from going, and it saddens me that you didn't.”
That thought didn't enter my mind before hours after you'd left. I had to take care of Hanako, you know.
”I can't blame you though. Like I said earlier, I'm used to locking my emotions up, and I wouldn't be surprised if you had seen it as a situation where you had to let me do what I did. Not even right now, as I'm telling Akira to write this, am I sure if I did what's right. I can say that what we had was just a teenage love, nothing that would ever last, but of course it doesn't feel like that. I guess it never would, even if it was.
I'm sorry if I hurt you, Hisao. I love you, and I have tried to change myself, but it's hard. I'm still trying, mind you, and I want you to help me, whether I'm in Scotland or not. Since I don't want this letter to run too long I'll just say that on the bottom of this page you'll find my new the number to the new cellphone my father has decided that I should have as a “Coming Back”-gift. The man might be an idiot, but I think he only really wants the best for me and Akira. (You're just too trusting, sis. - Akira)

Hisao, there's so much I want to say, but I can't. I love you.

Lilly”

The last sentence is written with the writing of the blind girl I love. Lilly...
It takes a few moments for me to actually gain my mind back. I take my cellphone from my pocket and enter the number I see on the letter. I can't press the call button, so instead I save it as a contact, before putting the phone on the desk.
I reread the letter. Then again. I then just reread the the part Lilly wrote herself. “Hisao, there's so much I want to say, but I can't. I love you.” I don't know why, but this sentence just seems to sum up the entirety of Lilly in a single sentence.
“We're just two children pretending to be adults, aren't we?”
I feel myself losing balance, so I take a step back and fall onto my bed. The fall blurs my sight, and when I focus again can see the block on my wall. Three. Lilly should at least be off the plane by now. If lucky she could possibly be home.
Eight hours. A third of a day difference. She's not a morning person, far from, but I guess she would have to be awake to make it home. Should I call? Would it be bad? She wants me to. She wouldn't lie about that, that's something I know for sure. Just a few buttons and we can talk.
Riiiiiing.
The sound takes me by surprise.
Riiiiiing.
I rise from the bed and make my way to the desk.
Riiiiiing.
On my phone see a single name: Lilly.
I guess that solves that problem.
Riiiiiing.
I answer the phone.
“Hisao Nakai here, how can I help you?”
“Hisao...”
Her voice gets right to me and I lose my sense of balance. The fall is stopped by the seat of my conveniently placed chair.
“Hi Lilly,” I say, mostly by instinct. The line remains silent for a few seconds.
“I got the letter. Shizune's good at making you find things.” I can't come up with anything else to say.
“Look Hisao, I'm sorry if I hurt you and I-” I stop her.
“Don't be sorry, Lilly. You did what you felt you had to do. I could have stopped you, but I didn't. I did think of it, although to late.” It seems like mentioning Hanako crying would not be a good thing to do right now.
“How is it, anyway,?” I ask after another silence. I'm not usually the one to lead our conversations, so I know there's something on her chest. I assume it's the stress of what has just happened.
“We just got back from the airport. I'm in my room right now, and it's been decorated since last time I was here. I wasn't able to get any sleep on the plane, and I couldn't focus on reading. It's just...” She sighs to end her statement.
“I know this is a lot of stress for you, Lilly. You made a hard choice, but I think you did the right one. Sometimes you have to put your needs over those of your friends. This was one of those times.” I'm not convinced in what I'm saying myself, but right now I want her to feel good even if it hurts myself. I love her, I really do, and I'll put her feelings above my own right now.
We go silent again.
“How did Hanako...?” She doesn't end her sentence, but of course I understand exactly what she means. I guess I'll have to tell her, even though I don't want to.
“She was sad. Very sad. She cried for quite some time, but I think it's better now. Her trip will definitely make her feel better.”
“...How have you taken it?” Her question takes me off guard, but this is exactly the thing she really called for, wasn't it?
“To be honest I haven't felt anything. I know I love you far beyond what I would've though was possible before I came to Yamaku, but when I want to feel saddened about you leaving I just feel empty. It might be my mind that forces away some kind of hatred I've developed, but I guess that hatred is partially to myself, too, since I let you do everything on your own. I could have helped you, but I didn't. And now we're as far from each other as if we were on different planets.” As I say these words I hear something on the other line. Sobs. Lilly's crying, and I can't be there to help her now, even though this is my fault. Lilly's tears finally brings my switch over the edge and I feel the tears gathering in my eyes.
“I'm so sorry Hisao, for doing all this, I love you so much and now we're so far from each other and I just wish I could be with you now and-”
“No, this is all my fault, I should have made you stay and I'm the one supposed to feel bad-”
“Hisao, I knew you wouldn't be able to stand up against my judgment. Even if you wanted to I haven't let you decide anything, I locked you out and now you're the one who has to pay-”
A trigger inside me finally snaps, and as the tears roll down my face I nearly shout into the phone.
“Don't you realise that what you've done is better for the both of us? You tried to make me tell you what I felt but I didn't and now I will pay for it. Lilly, you have the most amazing sister in the world who'll help you with anything. She'll be able to make you feel better. Don't worry about Hanako, I'm taking care of her, and even that doesn't seem to be needed for much longer. You're blaming yourself for something I've done and that's something I cannot let you do.”
The line once again grows silent, and I realise what I have just said. We just listen to each other breathing for what feels like an eternity but is probably more in the way of a minute or two.
“Neither of us are at our best right now, we should both get some sleep. Look, if you really feel like you have to take this weight upon your shoulders, at least let me help you carry it. I'm not perfect, Lilly, but from my view you are, and helping you brings me closer to that.”
We once again sit silent for a few seconds.
“Hisao?”
“Yeah.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, Lilly.”
“We should both get some rest.”
“We should.
“Goodbye, Hisao.”
“Goodbye, Lilly.”
Sitting with the phone against my ear I again hear her breathing. I assume she does the same. After about ten seconds of this she ends the call, presumably to follow my advice. I put the phone back on the desk before going back to my bed and falling into a position I don't have the stamina to get myself out of. I don't even turn the light off before falling asleep.

Interesting turn of events.

Elcor wrote:Interesting turn of events.

No kidding. This is the most bonkers not-quite-breakup-but-SO-EFFIN'-HOSTILE-BREAKUP in a minute.

Oh, man.

If you're reading this it means that you didn't stop me from going, and it saddens me that you didn't.

Geez, and I thought the end of that route pissed me off before. She not only has built this relationship up to fail knowing she was on a clock the entire time and tried to hide this inevitable conclusion until the end, but now she's intentionally turning it into one of those idiotic unspoken tests and putting the blame on him for not reading her mind and letting her leave? Good riddance.

My thoughts exactly. And not only doesn't Hisao tear up the letter in a rage, he actually accepts the blame, telling her she's perfect...
Forget the bitch already.

what is this? a chapter without a girl embracing hisao in a hug?

I feel a tad of irony here, since the popular consensus on the forums seemed to be that Hisao was a total tool for just letting Lilly leave like that.

However, seeing her actually point it out like that makes me want to punch a hole in the wall.

Mahorfeus wrote:I feel a tad of irony here, since the popular consensus on the forums seemed to be that Hisao was a total tool for just letting Lilly leave like that.

Popular consensus among Lillybros, maybe. I was actually annoyed that I got her good ending first, as she really pissed me off at the end. So did Hanako and Emi in different ways, which is why they have found themselves tied for bottom-tier in my book.

All comments regarding Lilly's letter: I agree. Lilly's a total bitch.

Chapter Six - The Runner
I wake up with a start. Lying down, it takes a few moments for me to remember the events of the time before I fell asleep. I check the time to see that I have slept for nearly fifteen hours. I guess a few hours of sleep on the bleachers weren't enough for my body to rest.
The cafeteria opens at 6:30 during the summer break, in fourty minutes. I wonder how many people will be there when it opens. None, I'm guessing.
Lilly...
I relay the events of yesterday in my head. I ran, I ate, I walked. And then Lilly called.
No, I didn't do this alone. I depended on Lilly, and now I don't have her here. I know that I can't go through this alone, but I have Hanako, and Emi, too. Lilly has her family, I'm sure Akira will be able to cheer her up, like I might have to do with Hanako. But Hanako is strong, I know that. She will let me help her if she she needs it... I can't say the same for myself, though.
“That offer to come visit us is still open for acceptance.”
Did she mean more than she said? Is this an invitation to more than just a visit? I'll ask Emi about that later. Considering we're supposed to go running every morning from now until Sunday, it's not like I'm out of opportunities.
The bigger question, I assume, would be whether I would want it to be more than that. My (former) girlfriend is in Scotland. I still love her, and from what I heard from her yesterday I can assume that she does the same. But that doesn't change the fact that we broke up.
Looking over at the clock again I notice that time has passed faster than I thought: It's already a quarter to seven. I take my time to get up and get to the cafeteria.


To my surprise I'm actually not alone. There's a boy sitting at a corner table reading as I enter the cafeteria. From this distance I can't see any title, but the book seems fairly thick.
I walk up to the counter and order a bowl of miso soup and some steamed rice. Nothing original, but I'm not in the mood to take anything special. Especially considering what the special dishes here usually taste like.
I glance around the cafeteria. It's uncommon for it to be this empty, but I guess that's how summers here are.
That reminds me of something else: How am I supposed to tell my parents that I don't want to go home over the break? It even sounds awful to myself, but I don't have anything binding me there anymore; I'm an outsider there now. A freak who can't run without getting a heart attack.
Arrhythmia. A group of heart problems that will cause your heart to be unstable and easily shocked. A hit in the chest could kill you. A regular workout could turn out fatal.
It still feels foreign to me. I've accepted the fact that I probably won't live as long as most, it doesn't bother me. Just knowing that I need to be taken care of as a doll, however, does.
I flinch when I'm handed my tray. It seems I've flinched a lot the last few days, but I try to ignore that. I'm just off, now that I don't have Lilly with me anymore. It's that easy, nothing weird. I hope.
I sit at a random table and drift into distractions again, now while eating steamed rice. Barely tastes anything, and that's compared to rice. I'm pretty sure the soup won't be any better, but I wouldn't be surprised if I were to start a fire if I tried cooking right now.
What am I doing? My girlfriend left two days ago and I'm trying to move on, even though it's clear we both love each other. Hell, I've accepted an invitation to stay a girl's house. I'm trying to rush through time like it's a tsunami behind my back. I'm heading for tomorrow missing whatever is today.
My thoughts are interrupted when I hear the entrance open. I look up to see Shizune coming in, alone. Either Misha's left the school or she's sleeping. I decide not to guess.
When she notices me I put up my hand as to say hello. She seems start the process of doing the same, but stops and instead walks up to the counter. Apparently the woman behind the counter knows sign language, because Shizune doesn't appear to have any problems ordering. She's quickly given her breakfast and she walks to the table I'm sitting at, taking a seat in front of me.
I look down to my tray to realise that I've finished my breakfast. Looking over to the wall a clock tells me it's ten past seven, so I have plenty of time.
“Hello,” I say, even though I know she can't hear me. She seems to understand what I mean and her mouth turns to a small smile before going back to her regular catlike self.
The girl in front of me broke into my room to leave me the letter. Should I be angry or happy?
I decide on the latter.
Opening my mouth she seems to understand that I want to say something. She puts a finger to my lips to silence me before taking out a small notebook from a pocket. She hands me the notebook and a pen she seems to have had in the pocket, too.
“Thanks,” I write before handing back the notebook and pen. She looks at it before writing something herself. She hands the notebook to me, again.
“What did it say?” I'm surprised at how direct she is, even though I've seen this behavior before. I think for a few seconds before taking the pen from her hand and writing.
“Don't you think that's a little to intimate for you to know?” As Shizune reads what I just wrote her face looks more and more like that of a cat. She wants to play a game. I take the notebook and pen from her.
“If you're that serious about it I'm better off just telling you. She told me what she felt, what she wanted. More than that I can't tell you.”
Her face is still that of a cat's until she looks up at me when done reading. Apparently I'm showing some kind of sad emotion, since she herself looks slightly saddened by it. I don't know what it really is. Pity? Wouldn't surprise me.
“Sorry, I was just curious.” She hands me the notebook with a smile I'm assuming is mostly there to try to give me one. It doesn't help, but I at least try to look better. I seem to be quite the actor, since she goes back to the Shizune I'm used to seeing, the one without any mercy. She starts to eat as I drift away into fantasy.


After leaving Shizune at the cafeteria and changing clothes I make my way to the track. I'm not surprised to find Emi there early.
“Early!” She turns her head and notices me. I raise my hand in a wave and she does the same. I jog to her.
“Before we actually start I just need to ask you: That invitation you gave me, it's nothing more than just that, right?” Emi looks at me, slightly confused, before she realises what I mean. I seem to have offended her.
“Of course not! What do you take me for, some boy-stealing pervert?” She seems to misunderstand whatever I show afterward as sadness, since she shows me the face I fear: Emi's “sad puppy”-pout. “I just don't want you to be sad.”
“Don't worry! Don't worry! Just don't do that face, please?” I can hear the desperation in my voice. At least this statement turns her back into her regular self. She sticks out her tongue at me.
“Let's warm up!” She starts running the track at a pace I can follow myself. I can say that I won't be able to go much faster, though, since it seems that whatever filled me yesterday left with Lilly's call.
As we run I quickly feel myself getting tired. I feel my hard and fast breathing, and Emi seems to giggle.
“Did you lose your lungs or something? I know you can do better than this, Hisao!” She seems to have forgotten the heart flutter that followed yesterday's running and she speeds up. I follow for a while, but I can't continue for long. I slow down to a pace that I find better fitting and continue there.
Emi passes me as I make the halfway-point of my first lap. This girl is fast. I look at her and notice something: She looks so calm. It's like there's nothing in the world besides her and the track, and she's going to master it. I barely notice myself speeding up when I continue. That face of hers is encouraging, I can tell you that.
My lungs feel like they're filled with lead, but I continue. If Emi wants me to get better health I can't let her down, she'll pout at me if I do. I don't think anyone would do anything knowing those as the consequences. I cross the halfway-point for the fourth time: Half a lap more and I can rest. Emi passes me again, and I have no idea how many times she's done that by now. Not that I stand a chance against her, not now, not ever. Maybe if she were to sleep for a hundred years during which I did nothing but run, but not likely.
Finally. I pass the starting-line for the last time today. I feel like I should fall over and die, but that would get Emi angry at me, and I wouldn't dare an eternity of being scolded by her in a potential afterlife.
I gasp for air, and the fictional lead in my lungs finally takes me to my knees. My throat feels like it's been filled with cement, and I'm sure that my chest will explode. Maybe I should have taken it easier? Not that I can change the past.
A shadow takes form on the ground in front of me. I look up to see Emi smiling at me with a smile worthy of gods. She gives me her hand, which I grab, and she helps me back to my feet.
“Thanks,” I say with the voice of someone who's smoked for fifty years straight. I give a small laugh at this realisation, and Emi gives her trademark giggle.
“You don't have to thank me, it's my job. I'm like your mentor!” I turn my head to face her and notice that she's still smiling. I guess she likes to smile.
“I thank you with all of my heart, Emi-sensei. Although it's not much of a heart.” Bowing as I say this, Emi goes back to giggling.
“Now follow me, student, for I will take you to the shaman who will heal your body.” She tries to give off a serious impression, but fails extremely. Laughter flows out of my mouth as we take off towards the nurse's office.

This story is so damned frustrating, and I don't mean just the content. Stop it with the italics already and doublespace your paragraphs... making the story physically harder to read is a bad plan.

nemz wrote:This story is so damned frustrating, and I don't mean just the content. Stop it with the italics already and doublespace your paragraphs... making the story physically harder to read is a bad plan.

Can't you people decide what you want? First I'm told to doublespace my paragraphs, then I'm told not to. Supposed to change the way I write dialog, and now get rid of italics.
I'm sorry, this is just the way I've been taught. Can't change what's already written, but I'll try to change it up a little in the future.

Wetterl wrote:Can't you people decide what you want?

It seems to me that the suggestions have been entirely consistent:

Either ALL thoughts are italics or none of it should be (preferably the latter).
Doublespace between paragraphs.
Start a new paragraph when changing speakers.
Use proper spelling, punctuation and grammar.

I love Lilly, just like the other girls but in this...I'm finding it hard too.
I can't help but see Emi having it out with Lilly in someway.