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Re: KS Writing Club: Cherry Blossoms (Updated 07/24/15)
Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2015 12:42 pm
by brythain
That's almost like a good ending. Nicely done. But there's more?
Re: KS Writing Club: Cherry Blossoms (Updated 07/24/15)
Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2015 5:05 pm
by Mirage_GSM
But there's more?
Uh... That's what I wanted to ask as well...
I know he said that this is supposed to be the last chapter, but it gives no explanation at all for Hanako's behaviour for the rest of the story, for her reluctance to talk to Hisao about university and everything.
There's a lot of build-up for some earth shattering revelation about some problem coming up, and now the resolution is basically: "Oh, and by the way, I want to go to the same university as you."
Re: KS Writing Club: Cherry Blossoms (Updated 07/24/15)
Posted: Sun Jul 23, 2017 2:00 pm
by Oddball
Yeah, the whole thing feels like it's building up to some great conflict or revelation and it never actually comes.
Likewise the characters and even time of year feel dramatically different between writers. It makes it harder to get into the story.