Katawa Shoujo Forums

brythain wrote:It's about strong female POV and male co-agonist taking on a monster. Wait, there's some connection to KS, let me go find it. Ah yes, the names of the individuals concerned…

You kinda have to read Hisao and Kenji: Master Detectives to understand the established connection. Hoitash has created a sort of AU where Hisao and Kenji basically became supernatural detectives in the years after Yamaku - several years later, actually - minus the super powers. Their tribulations have included encounters with the Yakuza, Illuminati, Templars, Masons, Xenomorphs (Predator), and assorted legendary creatures like werewolves. All of this while maintaining a family life, raising kids, and going to great lengths in preventing the wife - Hanako in Hisao's case - from finding out what their part-time detective agency really does.

It sounds more complicated than I think it is...

Sea wrote:You all may begin Also there are now bears, I totally wasn't wrong.

That should supply the “bear” necessities.

Anyway, I thought that the writing was campy, which is a good thing in this case. I like it when stories like these do not take themselves too seriously. I was glad that the writing was not in script format, as I have seen in many fan fictions. Pacing was consistent, and later on accentuated the “shock” factor.

Had a good setup with the characters and their backgrounds, but I felt that even though it emphasized what was at stake, it felt like too many characters being introduced at once. I was somewhat overwhelmed with the amount of new characters; had to re-read in order to keep track of whom was who. Then again, that is just my opinion.

As for the protagonists, they did not seem too out of character, though I would have thought that Hisao most certainly would have died being rag dolled in the manner described. There is enough external information coming in to make me satisfied with how both Akira and Hisao reacted to the situations in front of them, though. Definitely helped when the author put in subtle references to Kenji and Akira’s love of alcohol, just to remind us that it was not two random people taking on a werewolf.

The plot is not that memorable. The story makes meta-references to avoid standards, but it definitely follows the standards, which works anyway. Comic relief is not too blatant, and comes in handy. A couple plot points are definitely interesting (the Akira giving up scene), and the gravity of the situation is apparent.

I did lose my sense of immersion a couple times with snarky references to other media. My favourite being “Emperor on Earth, shoot the damn thing!” That got a chuckle out of me.

Overall, Hisao and Akira - Terror in the Night was not a bad read. The author took plenty of care in editing, and it was definitely interesting and new to see the characters deal with a werewolf.

EDIT: Just noticed the author posted. Thanks for the story, Hoitash.
EDIT #2: Oh, it's a part of a series. That would make more sense in regards to other characters. It works well enough by itself though.

Hoitash wrote:

brythain wrote:It's about strong female POV and male co-agonist taking on a monster. Wait, there's some connection to KS, let me go find it. Ah yes, the names of the individuals concerned…

And it takes place in Hokkaido, a place visited in one route.

We must be accurate about our lambasting, after all .

One natural consequence of advancing a timeline is that the link to Yamaku is weakened.

Very true, speaking as one who has suffered similar lambasting recently. I enjoyed (btw) HK:MD when I first read through your epic series a couple of months ago. So, an entertaining AU.

Velitation wrote:The author took plenty of care in editing...

I give my editor a great deal of credit in that regard. Helbereth is exceptionally adept at taking the semi-coherent pith I produce and molding it into decent writing.

brythain wrote:I enjoyed (btw) HK:MD when I first read through your epic series a couple of months ago. So, an entertaining AU.

Thanks, I do what I can .

I do sometimes get a little carried away with my references. These days I either work to rein it in or put my work in a setting where it's more fitting (like say, college.)

Hoitash wrote:

Velitation wrote:The author took plenty of care in editing...

I give my editor a great deal of credit in that regard. Helbereth is exceptionally adept at taking the semi-coherent pith I produce and molding it into decent writing.

Remember back when you handed this one over for editing? The main villain was a clown on meth, rather than a werewolf, and two-thirds of the story involved an insipid bar crawl through the seedier parts of Tokyo. As interesting as that all may sound, it was really just pointless - kinda like the HIMYM finale.

This is another one of those "well-written, not my cup of tea" stories. Hoitash is very good at those .

I will say that I did enjoy the first two chapters, where we get a small glimpse into the family lives of the characters. After that...well, I had a harder time suspending my disbelief and feeling like these were actually the characters we've all come to know and love, which would have probably helped me to overcome my aversion to the genre of the work. It's why I much prefer Road to Tokyo to the MD-verse. Still, I can't deny the quality of the writing or the editing, with which I rarely, if ever, have had a problem with either Hoitash's or Helbereth's work.

The story kind of had me as far as characterization goes up until Hisao started channeling Van Helsing. Granted, I have never really tried to read a Hisao and Kenji story before. The overall premise never really drew me in. Of course, that means I've missed out on a lot of character development, so I don't know how he grew to become a hardened monster hunter. Either way, I guess this is another case of Hisao becoming something I just can't picture him becoming.

Helbereth wrote:Remember back when you handed this one over for editing? The main villain was a clown on meth, rather than a werewolf, and two-thirds of the story involved an insipid bar crawl through the seedier parts of Tokyo. As interesting as that all may sound, it was really just pointless - kinda like the HIMYM finale.

You... you aren't serious, are you? Also, I have that DVD.

I was glad that the writing was not in script format, as I have seen in many fan fictions.

We discourage that pretty strongly here. I don't think any story in script format made it past chapter one here...

it felt like too many characters being introduced at once. I was somewhat overwhelmed with the amount of new characters;

To be fair they weren't all introduced in this story but in the prequels to it, though I have given up on keeping all of their kids' names (or even their numbers) straight as well.

It's why I much prefer Road to Tokyo to the MD-verse.

You do realize that Road to Tokyo is part of the MD-verse?

@Mahorfeus You... you aren't serious, are you? Also, I have that DVD.

I only needed to watch that movie once. That was enough for a lifetime. The fridge... sheesh.

This reading has also got the song Thriller stuck in my head, followed by Werewolves of London. In that order.

@Mirage_GSM

Yeah, I read the stickies. Figured as much. I'll keep it in mind if I ever write anything here.

Mahorfeus wrote:The story kind of had me as far as characterization goes up until Hisao started channeling Van Helsing. Granted, I have never really tried to read a Hisao and Kenji story before. The overall premise never really drew me in. Of course, that means I've missed out on a lot of character development, so I don't know how he grew to become a hardened monster hunter. Either way, I guess this is another case of Hisao becoming something I just can't picture him becoming.

That's probably Hoitash's biggest weakness. Almost right from the start he made Hisao and Kenji into pop-culture referencing gun-toting action heroes. There's been more than just a time or two that he had to be reminded that the character he was writing where supposed to have disabilities. Seriously.

Anyway though, other than the new characters that I just can't keep track of and frankly don't care that much about, this story was probably one of the better in his Action-Universe. It was pretty well paced, more in-character than a lot of his stuff, and didn't feature an entire army of people with advanced weapons and power armor getting mowed down by a guy with a heart condition and another guy that's (legally) blind.

Mirage_GSM wrote:

It's why I much prefer Road to Tokyo to the MD-verse.

You do realize that Road to Tokyo is part of the MD-verse?

I do forget that at times, because the connection feels tenuous. Insert a "rest of" in the appropriate place and it's all good .

Yeah, I've moved away from writing action KS fanfics (except for my Halloween Specials, because I enjoy those too much to give up) in favor of stuff more like Road to Tokyo because it's better received and fun to write.

I have other outlets for my action genre writing nowadays, thanks once again to Helbereth .

Hoitash wrote:I have other outlets for my action genre writing nowadays, thanks once again to Helbereth .

Interesting...do you have a link? I'd be interested in reading it, because I have a feeling I'd enjoy your action stuff more if I wasn't being distracted by it involving (alleged ) KS characters.

Moving right along to:

The Fireman Author: Mehkanik Etc.

So yes! i alluded to this along time ago and realized i never did anything with it so now it has returned! This is probably my favorite piece of KS fanfiction that doesn't use the viewpoint of the girls or Hisao, or indeed anyone going to Yamaku, its a refreshing change4 and the writing is phenomenal. Good readings to you all and I'll see everyone on the 20th.

Just thought I'd poke my head in, seeing that you're reading The Fireman

I fucken LOVE this one.
It's just really nice to think that there was someone who cared about ol' bacon tits.
A guardian angel of sorts.
Fantastic fic, it really is.