Long term relationship with Rin? Be honest...

[slagman5]

I've just been reading a bunch of the replies to what i've said.

Maybe I can say something like this.

We talk about getting past it. But it the first step (unless your blind, then of course its not an immediate thought.)

You will see this person, before you talk to them, before you learn about them. You will make a pre-judgment. a Decision based a bunch of factors (one of the main ones being their physical appearence.)

"Oh look at this girl, she is..." (you will analyze what can gather, and from there, you will make a decision whether or not to approach her.) You will make the decision if you noticing the fact she doesn't arms will deter you from making first contact or not. (At this point, as I've mentioned, most people would feel deterred by it due to the abnormal nature of the person. Of course some would and could not be deterred, from that point we can add emotional and mental aspects of an individual into the later decision for furthering a relationship.)

This kind of thought process isn't just about people, its about anything, We pre-judge food just on appearance, before tasting it. "ugly" looking food is avoided because it doesn't look appealing, even if it could be really delicious.

Ok, but what does all of that have to do with what I'm asking? I'm asking if all other aspects are the same about the relationship except now it's you and it's in real life, you already know Rin, you already grew close to her, and she's already confessed to loving you... Where does first impressions and all of that come into play here?

[slagman5]

So, quite apart from the assertions that love is blind or doesn't think about practical concerns, what do you really think of having a long-term relationship with Rin?

For me, it would have to be. You'd have to be in it for the long haul or not at all. I don't think I'd be deterred by her physical appearance. The problems of daily life would come later, and I'd be concerned by her physical limitations. It's not that she can't do many things for herself: there's ample evidence that the armless can do many things (even most things) with their legs. But they're inherently more vulnerable given the nature of the world. I agree that if you love someone, you will try to make it work. I'm just not confident I'd be able to do that, being as honest as I can.

Hey, and that's all I'm asking, your honest opinion if you think YOU will be willing to do it. There's no "right" answer here, asking for your own personal opinion in how you'd treat this situation. Just because I say I won't mind her physical disability doesn't mean that you won't mind it. And neither of us are more right or wrong than the other. We all approach things differently.

[Zykes]

Ok, but what does all of that have to do with what I'm asking? I'm asking if all other aspects are the same about the relationship except now it's you and it's in real life, you already know Rin, you already grew close to her, and she's already confessed to loving you... Where does first impressions and all of that come into play here?

You made the point that the scenario, there is no heart issues, no school or anything like that, but it's in real life.

How would you met a girl like Rin? What would bring you to a situation that could create a relationship?

Hisao was thrusted into a position of going to Yamaku due to his condition. And his eventual connection to Rin was built upon something that started out of his control.

If it's not the same as him, then the first sight of Rin is important to the decision. Looking at Rin from the VN, She is appealing, but her missing her arms doesn't way on my mind because there is no grasp of reality to it.



This took me quite a time to find, but she is a real person, and she is i'd say rather attractive, but I find myself in the end deciding against an attempt at a relationship due to the simple physical aspect. Of course better men then I would make an effort I am sure.

but I made the decision based on a realistic view point based on the scenario you gave at the begin, and I just wanted to point out, that others could look at it from this point of view to make a more objective decision.



I'm sure it's not as difficult to look at this and make the same choice.

[SpunkySix]

Am I crazy for:

1. Not even noticing that girl's lack of arms until I read the post properly

and

2. Not even thinking about the physical difficulties?

Like, that girl is cute, and if I met her, the thought of having to deal with her arm troubles wouldn't have even crossed my mind.

Honestly, and this might come off as an insult to somebody so please don't take it that way, but if you want to get to know somebody, yet the thought of having difficulties dealing with their physical limitations makes you turn away, then you probably don't actually care all that much about them and you shouldn't ever even start a relationship with them, let alone try for the long term.

[Zykes]

Honestly, and this might come off as an insult to somebody so please don't take it that way, but if you want to get to know somebody, yet the thought of having difficulties dealing with their physical limitations makes you turn away, then you probably don't actually care all that much about them and you shouldn't ever even start a relationship with them, let alone try for the long term.

Very true.

however, Just like any animal in the world, we are seeking an ideal partner and of course, we may not realize it, but physical traits matter to all creatures while seeking a mate, for one reason or another.

[KeiichiO]

Honestly, and this might come off as an insult to somebody so please don't take it that way, but if you want to get to know somebody, yet the thought of having difficulties dealing with their physical limitations makes you turn away, then you probably don't actually care all that much about them and you shouldn't ever even start a relationship with them, let alone try for the long term.

I agree, wholeheartedly.

[slagman5]

You made the point that the scenario, there is no heart issues, no school or anything like that, but it's in real life.

How would you met a girl like Rin? What would bring you to a situation that could create a relationship?

Hisao was thrusted into a position of going to Yamaku due to his condition. And his eventual connection to Rin was built upon something that started out of his control.

If it's not the same as him, then the first sight of Rin is important to the decision. Looking at Rin from the VN, She is appealing, but her missing her arms doesn't way on my mind because there is no grasp of reality to it.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/07/ ... 33x303.jpg

This took me quite a time to find, but she is a real person, and she is i'd say rather attractive, but I find myself in the end deciding against an attempt at a relationship due to the simple physical aspect. Of course better men then I would make an effort I am sure.

but I made the decision based on a realistic view point based on the scenario you gave at the begin, and I just wanted to point out, that others could look at it from this point of view to make a more objective decision.

http://www.katawa-shoujo.com/res/char/char_rin.png

I'm sure it's not as difficult to look at this and make the same choice.

And do you think she has to go to some "disabled people" school? Both my middle school and my high school had a few people missing limbs who attended there. I never met one missing both arms, but I think that's more to do with chance than them not ever going to a normal school... The girl in my highschool was missing both her legs, but she didn't wear prosthetics like emi, but had a motorized wheelchair...

[slagman5]

Am I crazy for:

1. Not even noticing that girl's lack of arms until I read the post properly

and

2. Not even thinking about the physical difficulties?

Like, that girl is cute, and if I met her, the thought of having to deal with her arm troubles wouldn't have even crossed my mind.

Honestly, and this might come off as an insult to somebody so please don't take it that way, but if you want to get to know somebody, yet the thought of having difficulties dealing with their physical limitations makes you turn away, then you probably don't actually care all that much about them and you shouldn't ever even start a relationship with them, let alone try for the long term.

I would agree that she's an attractive young lady, but I'll stop there, because she looks young, like very young, lol.

[SpunkySix]

I would agree that she's an attractive young lady, but I'll stop there, because she looks young, like very young, lol.

Does she? She looks at least 18 if not then very close to it, and I'm 19, so... ??

Eh, whatever. I mean, she's cute, but not like, smoking or whatever, so it's not really a problem either way.

[Zykes]

And do you think she has to go to some "disabled people" school? Both my middle school and my high school had a few people missing limbs who attended there. I never met one missing both arms, but I think that's more to do with chance than them not ever going to a normal school... The girl in my highschool was missing both her legs, but she didn't wear prosthetics like emi, but had a motorized wheelchair...

Well I was never specific on where, cause it really doesn't matter too much.

And the point I'm making is like, with the girl in the wheelchair, would you have considered dating her honestly? You haven't gotten to know her yet, but you see her, would you over look the fact she was missing her legs and bother to get to know her, despite the options to date others who aren't in the same boat as her?

[Zykes]

I would agree that she's an attractive young lady, but I'll stop there, because she looks young, like very young, lol.

Does she? She looks at least 18 if not then very close to it, and I'm 19, so... ??

Eh, whatever. I mean, she's cute, but not like, smoking or whatever, so it's not really a problem either way.

Based on the article I got it from, she was 16 in 2011, so she'd be 19 or 20 now, so no worries.

[SpunkySix]

And do you think she has to go to some "disabled people" school? Both my middle school and my high school had a few people missing limbs who attended there. I never met one missing both arms, but I think that's more to do with chance than them not ever going to a normal school... The girl in my highschool was missing both her legs, but she didn't wear prosthetics like emi, but had a motorized wheelchair...

Well I was never specific on where, cause it really doesn't matter too much.

And the point I'm making is like, with the girl in the wheelchair, would you have considered dating her honestly? You haven't gotten to know her yet, but you see her, would you over look the fact she was missing her legs and bother to get to know her, despite the options to date others who aren't in the same boat as her?

I know I wasn't asked, but personally I'd say yes. I can't know for sure, but I think I'd hate myself if I was that put off by a wheelchair that I threw out what could potentially be one of the happiest times of my life just because I didn't want to deal with her annoying handicap. There are plenty of people not in wheelchairs, sure, but most of them suck and if she doesn't then that weighs in her favor, not theirs.

And okay, good to know with the age, I suppose.

[slagman5]

And do you think she has to go to some "disabled people" school? Both my middle school and my high school had a few people missing limbs who attended there. I never met one missing both arms, but I think that's more to do with chance than them not ever going to a normal school... The girl in my highschool was missing both her legs, but she didn't wear prosthetics like emi, but had a motorized wheelchair...

Well I was never specific on where, cause it really doesn't matter too much.

And the point I'm making is like, with the girl in the wheelchair, would you have considered dating her honestly? You haven't gotten to know her yet, but you see her, would you over look the fact she was missing her legs and bother to get to know her, despite the options to date others who aren't in the same boat as her?

Um, why not?? I don't have a weird fear of wheelchairs or anything... And if the "hot" girls walking on their own feet are stuck up air-heads and the girl in the wheel chair is completely cool and is really interesting to talk to, I honestly don't even see a dilemma there at all...

But regardless, my original question doesn't have anything to do with that, do you just really really not want to answer the question already asked or what? lol.

[slagman5]

I would agree that she's an attractive young lady, but I'll stop there, because she looks young, like very young, lol.

Does she? She looks at least 18 if not then very close to it, and I'm 19, so... ??

Eh, whatever. I mean, she's cute, but not like, smoking or whatever, so it's not really a problem either way.

Based on the article I got it from, she was 16 in 2011, so she'd be 19 or 20 now, so no worries.

Ok, but I was right, in that photo, she's 16...

[Zykes]

Well in the long run, if a person can weigh it out in a realistic manner, rather then seeing the drawn image and use that as a basis for their decision. Thats all really the ends of it. (Based on the original criteria of the question.)

And I apologize to Slag in sense. My "point" does comes off as somewhat antagonistic (though there is no intention with that.) I can understand something that can be described as a deep-rooted desire is not something anyone wants tarnished in any manner.

Rin isn't my number one, but I can say she isn't anywhere near the bottom of the list. (This list being of all girls, not just the main route ones.)

She is very interesting on both an emotional and mental level, even with some form of abrasion with her conversations. But I don't find her physical attractive. So she would make a great friend, at best for me.