(Where's the Walkthrough?)
https://ks.fhs.sh/
So Emi's dealing with phantom limb pain, huh?
Poor girl.
Those dizzy spells our main man is having are concerning as well, I wonder why Emi ended the phone call like she did, guess I'll have to keep reading to find out 
Great to see an update! As I mentioned before, I find your handling of the reunion pretty interesting. Please kindly allow me to reference your work in mine, especially on the BY high school friends part.
Edit: Potential error in the Karaoke picture. There should be 3 boys (Shin, Takumi, Hisao) and 3 girls (Mai, Kai, 'Nako). But there are 4 girls in the photo. Also the positions don't match. The description says, "I take a seat at the end of the bench on the far side next to Mai. Next to her is Fushiharu, and with enough space for the other two is a gap with Shin on the other side." So, before 'Nako and Takumi went back to their seats the order should be: Shin, x, x, Kai, Mai, Hisao, next to the EXIT. After Hisao and Kai go to the stage, the order should now be: Shin, Takumi, 'Nako, x, Mai, x. Now let's say 'Nako took Hisao's original seat (i.e. Shin, Takumi, x, x, Mai, 'Nako), then it also doesn't make sense as you said "Kai is smaller than Iwanako, who herself was pretty short", so she shouldn't be taller than Mai as the picture illustrates. (However, in the Scene 3 photo, 'Nako looks to be almost taller than Hisao, so there's another potential inconsistency.)
I really liked this chapter - or these three chapters?
Anyway a really nice flow of scenes with a good progression - and not a single mention of PTSD
Not even much to comment on:
“Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” by names I don’t recognize and can barely read.
Guy doesn't even recognize Elton John... Philistine!
...silences that used to hang over us when it was just him and Ime.
Before I got to responding to the comments, I wanted to give an update on how the Scenes will look in the future. After some deliberating and bits of feedback I think it's in the best interest of everyone here that going forward I try to avoid larger posts such as Scene 4. As much as I enjoy larger Scenes, it means longer wait times between posts and makes it harder to find the time to read it in one go which can be frustrating. So going forward I will be posting Scenes in parts I'll call "chapters" The goal is to keep them relatively short compared to everything so far, but Ideally this'll mean less time between posts and a more readable experience for everyone. Thanks for reading and I hope to see you all in the next one as well!
hdkv wrote: Sun Mar 10, 2024 7:06 amOh, so maaaany things have changed since the last update! It's good to have some sense of stability and it was very good continuation of the story.
Moments of stability are definitely something that's been scarce for Hisao. Even when the stability comes with some... difficult conversations.
hdkv wrote: Sun Mar 10, 2024 7:06 amI guess the real conflicts of the story are ahead of us, and I'm really worried for Emi.
Glad to see you enjoyed the newest Scene! Hope you're ready for what's to come next.
Peorth wrote: Mon Mar 11, 2024 10:12 pmSo Emi's dealing with phantom limb pain, huh?
Poor girl.
Those dizzy spells our main man is having are concerning as well, I wonder why Emi ended the phone call like she did, guess I'll have to keep reading to find out
Phantom limb pain seems like actual hell to have to deal with. As for everything else, well I'll just agree that you'll indeed have to keep reading . Thanks for reading and glad you enjoyed!
ShizuneFan2019 wrote: Wed Mar 13, 2024 2:08 amGreat to see an update! As I mentioned before, I find your handling of the reunion pretty interesting. Please kindly allow me to reference your work in mine, especially on the BY high school friends part.
Feel free to reference it if you think it'll add to your story! Happy to be a source of some inspiration and happy to see you enjoy it.
As for everything noted here, I'll try to respond point to point.
1: All members are present and accounted for. Takumi has a slimmer build and longer hair than usual. He's on the right next to Shin. Though this image's depiction of him does have slightly longer hair than I would've gone with.
2: Positioning. The exit in the image (I think) is meant to be something more like a fire exit. Honestly, if I were to ask for a revision to this piece it'd probably just be to remove it. As for the positioning, as far as I can tell it's consistent with the description. If the exit to the main building is behind the camera on the right (or just off screen), that'd mean the order is Shin, Takumi, X (Kai), Iawanako, Mai, X (Hisao), with their exact positioning being morphed for visual clarity. Specifically Iwanako would probably be more to the left, I just didn't want her blocking Hisao/Kai off in the image. As for heights, the other 4 not on stage are sitting down, otherwise Kai would easily be the shortest. As for the differences in Iwanako's height, I'll have to chalk it up to different artists and perspective playing a roll. In the other image referenced, she's closer to the "camera".
Mirage_GSM wrote: Sat Mar 16, 2024 6:45 pmI really liked this chapter - or these three chapters?
Anyway a really nice flow of scenes with a good progression - and not a single mention of PTSD
Mirage_GSM wrote: Sat Mar 16, 2024 6:45 pmNot even much to comment on:
“Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” by names I don’t recognize and can barely read.
Guy doesn't even recognize Elton John... Philistine!
Hisao needs some culture in his life, for sure. Glad you enjoyed the update and had little issues with it!
StealthyWolf wrote: Mon Mar 18, 2024 3:28 amAs for everything noted here, I'll try to respond point to point.
1: All members are present and accounted for. Takumi has a slimmer build and longer hair than usual. He's on the right next to Shin. Though this image's depiction of him does have slightly longer hair than I would've gone with.
2: Positioning. The exit in the image (I think) is meant to be something more like a fire exit. Honestly, if I were to ask for a revision to this piece it'd probably just be to remove it. As for the positioning, as far as I can tell it's consistent with the description. If the exit to the main building is behind the camera on the right (or just off screen), that'd mean the order is Shin, Takumi, X (Kai), Iawanako, Mai, X (Hisao), with their exact positioning being morphed for visual clarity. Specifically Iwanako would probably be more to the left, I just didn't want her blocking Hisao/Kai off in the image. As for heights, the other 4 not on stage are sitting down, otherwise Kai would easily be the shortest. As for the differences in Iwanako's height, I'll have to chalk it up to different artists and perspective playing a roll. In the other image referenced, she's closer to the "camera".
I see your point right there.
Looking forward to your next update, and I'll adjust accordingly.
ShizuneFan2019 wrote: Wed Mar 20, 2024 2:36 am[snip]
Looking forward to your next update, and I'll adjust accordingly.
I would operate under the assumption that the image in not 100% representative of the actual story. It's meant to be a visual, done by an artist not familiar with the material. With that said, if you do use the image as reference just make sure to give the artist the same credits I did.
Scene 5: Unwelcome Reflections and the Girl Left on her Own
Chapter 1: Prelude to Doubt
Ugh… I don’t wanna wake up. Stupid alarm, waking me up at the same time you have for the past few years now. Don’t you know I can’t go- Ah… right, I can’t go on morning runs right now; I don’t need to grab my blades. The urge came and went so quickly today… Am I getting used to this arrangement? I hope not.
I don’t like wheelchairs, and I really don’t like to wake up this early if I can’t go on a run. “Keeping a schedule is the right thing for you to do right now, Emi.” His words taunt me as I recall our last conversation. Still deciding if that was Shige talking to me, or Nurse to one of his students. I mean, I know it’ll help if- when I get back to running, buuut that’s easier said than done.
Besides, I’m certain that advice wasn’t for the sake of my physical health.
There was something going on today though. Right? Right! Hisao’s leaving today and I want to at least say goodbye to his face. Why does he have to live four hours away in the far end of the Saitama Prefecture? Phone calls are fine and all, but they aren’t the same and this’ll be the last time we can see each other for two weeks.
Right. Let’s go.
“Ow!” I sit up a little too quickly and a jolt shoots up my left leg. Gingerly, I maneuver myself to the foot of the bed and transfer into the waiting wheelchair. To keep my hands free, I balance a little basket on my lap which I quickly fill with my outfit for the day (which is cute as hell), a fresh roll of gauze, and everything else I need, then I head to the bathroom.
Once I’m there, I set the basket aside, brush my teeth, then start the careful process of showering without legs. I’m proud of how quickly I can get it done these days but I hate that it's necessary at all.
First thing to come off is the shrinker on my right leg, then the wrap and gauze on my left, and lastly the rest of my clothes. Then I move the stool for the shower out of the way and unfold the chair on the wall. I transfer onto it, hook the basket onto the back of the wheelchair so I have a place to put everything as I finish using it, and carefully tuck the wheelchair behind the separating wall – safely outside of the splash-zone.
I take a deep breath and remind myself there’s no better way to wake up a fogged-up brain than this. Get it? Fogged, like fuc-c-c-KING COLD! “Sh-shit, that’s f-f-freezing!”
By the time the water warms up, I’m wide awake and shivering. It would be more comfortable to warm it up before turning it on myself, or even getting in, but this way guarantees the wheelchair doesn't get wet.
Speaking of which – which being nothing since I was never speaking about it but it still crosses my mind – I haven’t heard Mom moving around yet. She better not have slept in today of all days. I won’t let her hear the end of it!
Or… maybe not. I should go a little easier on her, after everything that’s happened. But I really don’t want to be late today.
Aaand there goes my leg.
It’s still difficult to put too much weight on it or let it hang for too long so unless I do a careful dance in the shower with my positioning it’ll become painful and stay that way for a couple hours. There’s always the option to get something more comfortable than this basic chair, but at that point I may as well roll outside and shout ‘hey World! I give up!’ and Ibarazakis do not give up.
After I finish the shower, re-wrap my leg, and slowly dress myself, I reach for my hair ties.
Should I just stick with the yellow ones because they’re cute and work well with my usual outfit, or should I try a new color again? Shige gave me a multicolor pack a long time ago for a birthday, and the last couple times I tied my hair up with the blue ones to see if Hisao would notice, he didn’t. The first time was when we were gonna go on that hike and I might have caught him glancing at them, but he never said anything so it’s hard to tell if he actually noticed or was just staring off into space. He does that a lot.
Then I tried again when we went for that picnic a few days ago, but he was pretty damn distracted - which is fair, I think, considering everything going on. We were in a car crash, he almost died, Lilly and her sister showed up, yadah, yadah, yadah. So of course he didn’t notice; it was a busy and exhausting week.
He almost died.
Bad Emi. Hair ties. Pink. Pink is a loud color. And he knows how I don’t really care for the color, so maybe he’ll comment this time. Hopefully. Yeah, I’ll go with pink.
They’re stiff with disuse and I’m surprised they don’t snap when I put them on. Alright, that should do it. And it looks… good? Might even be cute. I wonder if Hisao will think so too…
Shit, even after all this time the thought of Hisao calling me cute still makes me blush. Then the warm feeling vanishes and a frown plants itself on my face. It’s been a long time since he said something like that. I think the last time was the day after he woke up from the crash. Obviously I don’t hold it against him… but you can’t blame a girl for missing it either, right?
When I open the door to leave, Mom is walking past towards my room. She smiles, yawns, then says, “So you are awake. Fantastic.”
“I never sleep in!”
“I don’t know about that~ ”
“Says the woman who is still rubbing the drool from her face.” There are bags under her eyes too, but I don’t say anything about them.
“Do as I say, not as I do. Never said I was a shining example.”
“But at least you tell the truth. Hurry up and get ready! Hisao will start his morning walk in about an hour and I want to surprise him on his way back to his room.”
“Hmmm, but a nice lo~ ong bath sounds so relaxing right about now!”
I glare at Mom and she knows it since she locks her eyes on the bathroom door, feigning a dreamy expression.
“Mom, I know where you sleep.”
She turns back to me with squinting eyes and a goofy smile. “That’s exactly what I want you to think.” She’s way too proud of herself.
Making sure she sees my exaggerated eye roll, I push past her towards my room. “Just hurry up already!”
As I close the door I hear her shout from the bathroom, “Oh~ daughter of mine! You forgot to fold your chair up, again!”
Whoops.
~ ~ ~
As we turn into the parking lot at Yamaku, I spot Lilly and Akira standing behind one of the only other cars here. Before the crash, I barely interacted with Lilly, let alone Akira, but as I roll down the window I realize I’m happy to see them.
“Lilly! Akira! Hiiiii!” I wave to them, my head half out the window. Akira waves back, then leans over to Lilly, who giggles at whatever her sister said. Seeing them laugh together like that gives me a pang of jealousy as I think about what it’d be like to have a close sibling like those two have – or close… anyone.
My mom slaps the arm that’s still in the car. “Are you a dog? At least wait until we park the car.”
Luckily they’re only parked a couple spaces away from the dedicated wheelchair spaces, so we wind up next to them. I open the door to talk while Mom sets up the wheelchair, though it’s mostly Mom and Akira chatting at first.
Akira is in her boring ‘all work, no play’ mode since Mom is here, and the two quickly jump into a back and forth about as stale as they can be. They mostly talk about the new car and our recovery from the crash and something about insurance. Akira makes a point of reminding us to reach out if we need anything else, preferably to herself or her father.
While Mom and Akira are distracted I’m tempted to mock all the official talk by making faces behind their backs, but Lilly obviously wouldn’t see it and even if she could, I doubt she’d appreciate the joke as much as me. I settle for impatiently and ostentatiously tapping my fingers on the armrest.
Eventually, Akira takes the hint (my mom, if she noticed at all, just ignored me as I knew she would). She throws the last bags from the trunk over her shoulder and hands one to Lilly. “Can we walk and talk? We’ve got some stuff to drop off.” We nod our agreement and Akira offers an arm to Lilly, which the latter accepts. I for one am eager to be off because Hisao’s walk should end soon and I’d hate to miss him, but I didn’t want to rush them any more aggressively than I already am.
Lilly waits until we get into a rhythm, then asks, “If you don’t mind me asking, what brought you two to the school? I presume you aren’t staying here for the summer, Emi.”
I shake my head. “Nope. Just here to see Hisao off. What about you two?”
“I’m unpacking my belongings back into my room as the school finally approved my return. This is the last of it here.” Lilly lifts the bag she’s carrying to underline the point. I notice the bags Akira’s carrying look noticeably lighter.
“I can’t wait to see Shizune’s face after she sees you back at school!”
“Unfortunately I’m going to have to disappoint you: my cousin already knows of the change in plans.”
“Awww! It’s too bad we couldn’t have been there to give her the news. Imagine it! I bet she would have been speechless!”
Lilly laughs delicately while Akira brays. Dad would have been proud.
Lilly adds, “I’m sure it was quite a shock to her. I for one would only want to be there if I had hearing protection from Misha’s reaction.”
“No kidding!” Akira catches her breath. “My ears are already ringing just imagining it!”
Lilly, Akira and I share another laugh, leaving Mom out of the loop. When she remembers Mom’s here, Akira clears her throat, straightens herself out, and calms down. It takes Lilly and I a few more seconds to do the same, then Lilly asks, “So you’re here to see Hisao off then? Is he going anywhere special?” Akira’s nose flares as she glances at Lilly. She doesn’t say anything so I answer Lilly.
“Just home.” If Akira has something to say I’m sure she’ll say it.
“How long is he going to be gone?”
“He’ll be back in two weeks.”
“And where is his home?”
Why is she digging for so many details? She’s probably just making small talk but it feels intrusive. “... Down in the Minuma Ward of Saitama.”
“Oh my, that’s quite the distance. Will you be visiting him at all during that time?”
I’d like to, just not now. I shake my head again, then realize that Akira is the only one of the two able to see that. Small talk, Emi. Small talk. “Nah, I want to properly meet his parents on my own two legs, not wheels. Besides, I hear all of their bedrooms are on the second floor of his house. Not exactly wheelchair accessible. Have you been doing anything exciting since last time we talked?”
Akira tries to discreetly tug at Lilly’s arm, and she would’ve been successful had I not been looking at her directly.
Lilly doesn’t seem bothered. “Unfortunately much of my time has been spent ensuring affairs are in order. As it turns out, undoing a mid-year transfer whilst in the middle of said transfer is quite the undertaking.” She makes it sound like she’s taking care of a funeral. “It’s a shame that you won’t be able to join Hisao. You two have been quite inseparable for some time now. Will the two of you be alright?” Are we playing twenty questions or something? This is starting to feel much less like small talk and a lot more like an interrogation, especially with how quickly she moved on from my question.
We reach the splitting off point for the two dorms and Mom and I come to a stop. Akira notices and slows down as well. She also puts her hand on Lilly’s shoulder, like she’s trying to restrain her.
Speaking of Lilly, does she think we can’t manage ourselves on our own? “We’ll be fine. Hisao’s not a lost puppy anymore so I think he’ll be okay, and we’ll talk on the phone most nights. Do we really seem that fragile to you?”
Lilly and Akira have stopped to face us. Lilly frowns and narrows her eyebrows for a moment, like she didn’t expect such a dry response. “Sorry, I meant no offense. I’ve… always struggled with the idea of a long-distance relationship.” Before I can respond, she pulls her arm from Akira’s grasp and shakes her head, then the smile returns. “It sounds like a lovely arrangement. If I may, how’s his recovery going?” And she’s right back to the questions, though at least this one’s out of concern for his health.
Akira shifts uncomfortably, but for now I let the subject drop. I’ve been tense lately, Lilly’s just being polite, and my mom has put a hand on my shoulder and is sending through all the admonishing energy she can without outright saying anything. “Good! He’s been out of the hospital for a few days now, and his talking is pretty much back to normal, but he can’t run for a couple weeks - doctor’s orders.”
Mom butts in, “And he’ll actually take it easy and obey them because he’s a good boy, unlike someone I know.”
“Who could that be?” My sarcasm earns me a pinch on the arm. “Ow! Hey, that was mean!”
Lilly and Akira chuckle at my expense, then Lilly’s smile fades. “So Hisao’s okay with the separation?”
Okay seriously, what’s with all these questions? It’s starting to really annoy me. “He seems to be fine with it. Besides, I just said we’ll be talking every night.” Wow, okay Emi. calm down, it’s not that deep. She’s just being Lilly and is worried about him.
“Of course. Hmm.” Lilly nods, then seems to go deep into thought.
Akira notices and puts her hand on Lilly’s. At first I thought she was just holding it, but even in my anger I can see she’s squeezing Lilly’s hand rhythmically. By the time I realize what’s happening I’ve missed the first letters and can only catch the tail end – “__op it st-” Lilly snatches her hand away, scowling at her sister.
I’ve had enough of this.
“Stop what?” I ask coldly. It was guesswork to pin down exactly what she was probably saying, but it seems to have paid off because Akira and Lilly both look deliciously surprised that I know Wabun. Any other day I’d love this moment, but I’m too mad right now.
“Why is Lilly asking me so many questions? What’s going on?”
Akira recovers first, holding her hands up peaceably, like she’s worried I’m going to attack. And maybe I will. I can feel myself shaking with anger and my mother’s hand on my shoulder has tightened.
“I… don’t know if you want to know, to be honest, Miss- ah, Emi.”
“I think I do.”
“Knowing everything doesn’t always make you happier, you know. I’m speaking from experience here.”
“Do not talk down to me right now.”
“My apologies - I didn’t mean it like that.” Akira takes a second to carefully shift gears. “Would you take my word that based on what you’ve told us, you’ve absolutely taken the bottom out of my sister’s unfounded theory?” Lilly’s scowl could curdle milk, but Akira pays her no mind. Neither do I.
“Of course not! If I don’t even know what this ‘theory’ is, how do I know you’re not in on it?”
“I’m not, but I take your point. If you’ll let me-”
“No. I won’t let you! Tell me what’s going on!”
Mom sighs. “Emi dear, I’m sure they’re just worried about his well-being, is all.”
Why is everyone working against me here? “He’s my boyfriend - I just want to know!” I shriek.
Not even the wind dares interrupt the stone-cold silence. I hate the knowing, pitying look in Akira’s eye. It’s as though my little display just confirmed something for her. Then she abruptly nods to herself, wiping the look from her face, and clears her throat. “As mentioned before, my sister has a… theory she's been worried about since we initially spoke to Hisao-”
“Thank you for respecting attorney-client privilege,” Lilly scowls at Akira. Even through my own rage I recognize that Lilly can be very cutting when she wants to be. Then, back to the pretty, nice princess-girl act in an instant. “Akira’s summary is accurate. I was worried about Hisao but now I’m not. Your answers have made me feel much better.”
And yet I only feel worse. “What about Hisao worried you?”
“I’m certain it’s nothing worth making a fuss over at this point.”
I think it’s a bit late for that. “Then it won’t matter when you tell me, will it?”
“I wouldn’t want to make you stress over what’s likely a baseless assumption on our part.” Lilly slightly turns toward Akira, who seems unbothered her sister has incriminated her.
“Enough with the games, Lilly. If it really is nothing it won’t matter, but either way I need to know.”
Mom’s hand tightens again on my shoulder, but she says nothing.
Lilly doesn’t seem convinced and hesitates to respond. I’m about to start shaking the answers out of her when Akira steps in. “It’s only fair, Lilly – think of it as compensation for prior emotional distress.”
Lilly sighs. “I’m still not sure what value there is to be gained from this, but if you’re certain… As best as we could tell when we visited him in the hospital, it seemed like his thoughts and mind were preoccupied. Like he was worried and that something was bothering him - that’s all. As I said, probably nothing.”
Ah – “Was… was that it?”
“Yes. I apologize that my presumptions caused you undue stress.”
“No, no…” It’s like I’ve fallen flat on my ass after the rug’s been pulled from under me. I sag into the chair and Mom must notice since her vice grip on my shoulder loosens dramatically. “I shouldn’t have blown up at you like that. Sorry. As for Hisao being worried, well, that was probably my fault.”
Lilly cocks her head and looks concerned that I answered in spite of myself.
But it’s true. I couldn’t talk to him about my leg in the hospital, not there. I wanted to wait until we were both out at the very least. It bothered him a lot more than I hoped it would, but I guess waiting a whole week in the hospital with nothing to do but worry would do that to him… or anyone, really. Still, he never seems to stop worrying, even when I tell him not to. “Thanks for not telling him about my leg sooner. Sorry I got you involved.”
Lilly gives a warm smile. “I don’t mind. There are some things others should not interfere with. As for earlier, it’s only natural you’d get suspicious of us given the situation.” Her expression falls back to a neutral one. “However I- err…” It’s rare to see Lilly pause mid-sentence like this.
Akira nudges her shoulder. “Out with it, then.”
Lilly turns to Akira and nods. It seems like they’ve talked this out before already. “I don’t believe that’s what was on his mind. Of course, he was very concerned about your condition and did an extraordinarily poor job hiding that fact, but there was something else.” Something else? “I’m not sure, maybe I was just imagining it, but he seemed… I don’t know…”
Akira finishes the thought. “I believe your earlier description of it was that he was ‘lost in his own head,’ right?”
“Yes. Something along those lines.” Lilly smiles at her sister.
Akira rubs her forehead. “I’m still not convinced. Forgive me for being so forward, but he’s young, was in the hospital with a life-threatening condition, and is going to be separated from his girlfriend for a couple weeks. If you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras.”
So this isn’t a new conversation for them. I wonder how much time they’ve spent going back and forth in private. It’s nice to know others share my feeling that something was off with Hisao, but what could be bothering him?
I’m pretty sure I talked about everything going on with me at the picnic, and Hisao also talked about a lot… but then again he still seemed off for the rest of the day. He was unusually quiet, and kept trying to help me with busywork when I told him I was fine. At the time, I thought he was tired (and with good reason), but if Lilly noticed something even that far back…
“Sorry Emi. I didn’t mean to pry, it was just-” Lilly pauses and tilts her head to the side a little. “It seems as though we have company on the way.”
Speak of the devil. I wave him over. “Hisao! There you are.” While Hisao starts walking towards us I turn to Lilly and say, “I’m sure it’s nothing! Just as you said.”
“I’m sure…” She seems far from convinced, but drops the subject as Hisao joins us.
Table of Contents | Previous Scene: Scene 4: One Step Forward | Next Scene: Scene 5 - Chapter 2: Building Tension
First off, thanks to Stiles as always for the stupendous work and feedback you've given me. I love the way the story is coming together and improving under your advice.
As for this post, thus ends the shortest post for Uncertainty so far. After posting Scene 4, getting feedback on it, and honestly as the result of a lot of thinking about it both before and after that, I realized that posting a 20k word update was my breaking point. I don't want to make such large dumps all at once that it hinders the enjoyment of the story, and no amount of splitting posts will make up for the fact that it is all under one single "Scene" post. But I also didn't want to break up "Scenes" into separate Scenes because I felt it would harm the thematic ties I wrote them with.
Solution: Posting Scenes in parts labeled "chapters". These will happen at natural pausing points in the story while also giving distinctive breaks between the long Scenes as a whole. On top of that, it will hopefully lead to a smoother posting schedule. If things work out as I hope they do, the massive breaks between Scenes shouldn't be as massive in the future. But I make no promises and the only time a schedule will happen is when you see a date after "coming" for the next Chapter/Scene.
This Chapter is on the shorter side, but not by much for what I want the average chapter length to be. Some may still be on the longer side, but barring special exemptions I do not plan make a single post over 10k words going forward. If you're reading my new story "Saying Goodbye to Tomorrow", I am also using this method for posting that as well.
On to this chapter! I knew from the beginning of writing Uncertainty that I wasn't going to stick to just Hisao's POV. This was for two reasons. One, this isn't just Hisao's story; it's Hisao and Emi's. Writing Emi's perspective was and has been a nice change of pace and exploring another perspective and side of the story helped a lot of what I want to write click into place. I can't say whether or not there will be other perspectives as well later on, but it's not off the table . This perspective change is also why I described Scene 4 as the "end of 'chapter 1' of Act 1" last time, though the new naming scheme makes all that more confusing. Basically, think of it as a slight shift in stages for Act 1, of which I think there'll be 3. Not that any of those semantics matter...
Anywho, thanks for reading and see you next month for Chapter 2!
Guessing by the next chapter here: the central conflict of the story, here we go!
Maintaining relationships is harder than getting into relationship in the first place (divorce rate may bring your faith in humanity into very low points lol). I wonder how it will be resolved.
Looking forward for the next chapter!
I've been looking forward to your update! I must say, the way you write Emi's POV is so good that I feel like you either have the same personality as her, or your partner does.
As I have mentioned, I have been trying to align my story with your content, and I've given credit to you and the artists. As for the update rate, I agree that a sudden burst of reading material every like half a year or so isn't that great of an idea, mainly because by the time you post the next update, people most likely have forgotten about the contents of previous chapter, and have to read it again just to review the context, which could be annoying (especially for someone like me who's writing my own story and also reading a few others). Monthly updates, even if short ones, are probably better.
And I'm gonna adopt your Emi's ex-boyfriend's name (assume that it is) into my story, if you don't mind.
hdkv wrote: Mon Oct 28, 2024 3:50 pmGuessing by the next chapter here: the central conflict of the story, here we go!
hdkv wrote: Mon Oct 28, 2024 3:50 pmMaintaining relationships is harder than getting into relationship in the first place (divorce rate may bring your faith in humanity into very low points lol). I wonder how it will be resolved.
Looking forward for the next chapter!
I felt like, of all the relationships in the base game, the only one that had a smooth path forward after the good ending was Hanako's. Which, funny enough, is the one I think was still in the earliest parts of it and was least developed (romantically, at least). Every other relationship was more likely to run into issues down the line, IMO. I think Emi's was probably in second place behind Hanako's, but even Hanako's was still likely to have issues, so...
ShizuneFan2019 wrote: Thu Oct 31, 2024 3:21 amI've been looking forward to your update! I must say, the way you write Emi's POV is so good that I feel like you either have the same personality as her, or your partner does.
That's an amazing compliment, but I'm sad to report that I neither have a partner nor Emi's personality lol. I think I'd like to believe I have aspects of Emi in my personality (particularly the sarcasm and playfulness there within), but it'd be hard for me to further compare myself for a multitude of reasons.
ShizuneFan2019 wrote: Thu Oct 31, 2024 3:21 amAs I have mentioned, I have been trying to align my story with your content, and I've given credit to you and the artists. As for the update rate, I agree that a sudden burst of reading material every like half a year or so isn't that great of an idea, mainly because by the time you post the next update, people most likely have forgotten about the contents of previous chapter, and have to read it again just to review the context, which could be annoying (especially for someone like me who's writing my own story and also reading a few others). Monthly updates, even if short ones, are probably better.
I think the new update schedule will work better, so I'm happy to see others agree.
ShizuneFan2019 wrote: Thu Oct 31, 2024 3:21 amAnd I'm gonna adopt your Emi's ex-boyfriend's name (assume that it is) into my story, if you don't mind.
I'm not sure what name that would be (To be frank, I'd have to re-read most of what I've written in drafts to even know if I have settled on a name for Emi's ex). If you're referring to "Shige", that is Nurse's name in this story. See the start of the chapter connecting his name to actions of Nurse.
In any case, glad your enjoying and sticking around!
I felt like, of all the relationships in the base game, the only one that had a smooth path forward after the good ending was Hanako's. Which, funny enough, is the one I think was still in the earliest parts of it and was least developed (romantically, at least). Every other relationship was more likely to run into issues down the line, IMO. I think Emi's was probably in second place behind Hanako's, but even Hanako's was still likely to have issues, so...
Agreed, and the issue of a relationship with Hanako is described extensively in Sisterhood. And Sisterhood didn't even account for the family aspect of the problem (i.e. the role of Hisao's family in their relationship), which you've been addressing in your story (with Emi) and I'm going to do the same with mine.
That's actually quite shocking to me, because I believe it's always best and most comfortable to write for a person if you have the personality (or similar) of that person. For example, I'm a stoic, hard-working, and efficient person, so writing Shizune is easy for me. Meanwhile, I encounter big trouble when writing for Emi's sarcasm and playfulness. I can do a few paragraphs, but won't be sustainable. So, being able to write someone that doesn't suit your personality is awesome!
If you're referring to "Shige", that is Nurse's name in this story. See the start of the chapter connecting his name to actions of Nurse.
That's exactly what I was thinking! Now that you spoiled it, I can see that it makes some sense for it being the Nurse's name instead. I probably misunderstood it as a first name rather than last name because you didn't put "Mr." in front of it. In the original story, even though the Nurse seems to be closer to Emi than other characters, I don't see them go beyond a staff-student relationship, to the point that she can address him with first name and be given birthday presents, both of which the role is much more suitable as a boyfriend. My suggestion is, in order to avoid confusion, you might want to indicate the Nurse's name by, say, Emi reading the plate on the door or the name plate on his uniform.
Read first chapter of this while engorging on SGtT.
StealthyWolf wrote: Mon Feb 13, 2023 9:31 am“She hasn’t had other boyfriends?” Wait, Why’d I ask that? I must be more exhausted than I realize because that was a really stupid thing to ask.
Since Emi told Hisao about her ex-boyfriend in the game, is Hisao just meant to be exhausted to the point of some memory loss?
ShizuneFan2019 wrote: Mon Nov 18, 2024 10:09 pmThat's actually quite shocking to me, because I believe it's always best and most comfortable to write for a person if you have the personality (or similar) of that person. For example, I'm a stoic, hard-working, and efficient person, so writing Shizune is easy for me. Meanwhile, I encounter big trouble when writing for Emi's sarcasm and playfulness. I can do a few paragraphs, but won't be sustainable. So, being able to write someone that doesn't suit your personality is awesome!
Well, I do consider myself to be rather sarcastic and lighthearted in nature, so maybe I have more in common with Emi than I think, but my energy levels are definitely way below hers lol. Thanks for the compliments! I always try to make the characters I write as true to themselves as possible.
ShizuneFan2019 wrote: Mon Nov 18, 2024 10:09 pmThat's exactly what I was thinking! Now that you spoiled it, I can see that it makes some sense for it being the Nurse's name instead. I probably misunderstood it as a first name rather than last name because you didn't put "Mr." in front of it. In the original story, even though the Nurse seems to be closer to Emi than other characters, I don't see them go beyond a staff-student relationship, to the point that she can address him with first name and be given birthday presents, both of which the role is much more suitable as a boyfriend. My suggestion is, in order to avoid confusion, you might want to indicate the Nurse's name by, say, Emi reading the plate on the door or the name plate on his uniform.
Nurse's relationship to Emi can certainly be taken a lot of different ways. In general I like the idea of the two of them having a closer relationship (as explored on my Christmas short earlier in the year). In the case of Uncertainty and Emi's route in general, I think it's a relationship that would inherently be explored more as time goes on.
Hope your enjoying them both and will be back for more!
crimeedge wrote: Wed Nov 20, 2024 7:42 pmSince Emi told Hisao about her ex-boyfriend in the game, is Hisao just meant to be exhausted to the point of some memory loss?
Man's just clinically died for the second time in his life (in less than a year, no less). Yeah, he's exhausted af right now. I don't think he'd specifically recall that small part of what was a really big conversation unless he was thinking about it, which he definitely wasn't - especially in this moment.
Scene 5: Unwelcome Reflections and the Girl Left on her Own
Chapter 2: Building Tension
It’s amazing how a lot of really small concerns can build and build and build. After Hisao joined in, the four of us had a short conversation before Mom reached her limit and went back to the car, then Lilly and Akira left to finish unpacking.
Hisao and I took a short walk through the campus garden together and that’s where things got weird. Hisao seemed perfectly normal, which was nice until it wasn’t. In a flash of clarity that all but ruined the afternoon, I realized he was doing what I did - do? - when things were bothering me: act perfectly normal when clearly nothing is until whatever’s bothering you vanishes with the wind.
He called me cute, which was really, really nice but the sinking feeling only got worse when he made a joke about being his parents’ “broken son”.
I got pretty mad about that, but I think I hid it well. I was hopeful that maybe that was what he was hung up on but he apologized and moved on so quickly that I knew it wasn’t.
As I’m getting in the car I look up to say goodbye to Hisao and my heart stops. Why’s he so pale? I squeeze his hand reassuringly, “Hisao?”
He glances up at me. His eyes are unfocused and he seems lost in another world, just like Akira said. He forces a smile after catching onto my worry. “I’m fine. Just gonna miss you is all.”
I want to believe him - I really, really do - and hearing him say that makes my heart skip a beat, but then it sinks. I know that fake smile, and that look, and that tone.
I know that lie.
“You sure?” A vain attempt.
He nods. Hisao’s clearly hiding something. The question is, what? “I’ll call you after we get back to my house.” Just about everything he is doing feels extremely forced. It can’t be his heart, can it? He’d say something if it was.
I thought – no, hoped that maybe Akira was right and that Lilly and I were just worrying too much, but he’s not telling me something. He’s not talking to me. Why won’t he tell me what’s wrong? Or at least that something is wrong.
I do my best to give him a genuine smile. “I’ll be waiting,” and I will be. His eyes flicker towards the ground. He can’t even look straight at me. It was just a momentary slip-up, but it confirms everything. He’s hiding from me. Or hell, maybe I’m reading into it too much now. I don’t know. This is stupid.
I roll the car window shut. Hopefully I held back the tears long enough that he didn’t see them.
We start pulling away and he yells something from outside, but I don’t catch it. I glance at him one last time before we go over the crest of the hill. He hasn’t moved an inch. What aren’t you telling me, Hisao?
I thought we were past this.
I lean my head back, and look at the roof. Then I pull my knees towards my stomach and hug them.
Doesn’t he trust me?
Resting my head on my legs, I turn to look out the window. I watch as trees and benches and lamp posts and buildings and bus stops and everything else speed by in a growing blur of color.
I trust him. I finally trust someone on the outside again.
So why…“Why can’t he trust me?”
Mom’s hand rubs my back, and the dam breaks. I don’t even know what exactly I’m crying about. I hate it. I hate it, I hate it, I fucking hate it. This is what I get for letting someone in. Or maybe this is just punishment for everything I’ve done until now. Maybe I deserve this.
It hurts.
It hurts like hell.
The rest of the ride home is quiet. By now Mom knows whether I need space or if I need someone to talk to and this is definitely the former.
After we get home I retreat to my room and she doesn’t stop me. I wonder if Mom thinks it’s all just because he’s going to be away for a while or if she’s caught on to what’s really going on and I don’t know which I’d prefer.
I take off my carefully-chosen outfit and drop it on the floor. The last thing to come off is the pink hair ties. I stare at them for a moment before throwing them across the room.
He didn’t even notice. This is all so stupid. I think I just want to sleep.
My eyes crack open and I rub them clear. I grab my phone to check the time and for any missed calls. Nothing yet, but Hisao should be home at this point. He said he’d call me when they got back so I guess I’ll just have to wait.
There’s about an hour until the sun sets. Normally I’d be leaving to go on my evening run right about now.
That’s depressing.
…
I shake my head. No more of this shit, Emi! You don’t lie around all day wallowing in self pity, not anymore. Could it be better? Of course. But it could also be hell of a lot worse, and you know that more than anyone. You don’t deserve this. That’s fucking dumb.
I was probably- definitely overreacting to everything with Hisao earlier.
Thinking back to that first crash all those years ago, I was pretty exhausted too. Obviously I had to deal with recovery for my legs and well… not having Dad around, but those were draining in completely different ways. That’s probably all it is; it’s been a long couple of weeks, Hisao’s a little shaken, and just plain tired. I get that. I’m sure he’s fine. We’re fine.
It’s also probably why he hasn’t called yet. Chances are he fell asleep. The alternative is that he forgot, which is unlikely, or his parents surprised him with dinner, which is also not likely since he mentioned they had work tonight.
I was asleep for a lot longer than expected so I’ll be up for whenever he finally calls. Speaking of the time, I bet Mom’s back from shopping.
I could call her name but I don’t want her to worry and the encroaching evening commands silence. I wheel myself into the living room and find my mom, slumped over in her chair. I taste bitter fear for a moment before I see her chest rising and falling rhythmically.
In the twilight-filled kitchen beyond, an army of grocery bags clutter the floor. Sifting through them, it looks like Mom put away the perishables before taking a nap of her own.
Jeez, Mom. You need to take care of yourself too.
I get to work, putting things away. It feels like I’m running an obstacle course as I pick my way through the crowded kitchen, but the job gets easier as I clear more and more of the floor. At first, I thought about going to get the basket I use for showering but I just used an empty grocery bag, which works just as well for moving several small items around at once. The big ones I balance on my lap and the heavy ones, like the bag of rice, can stay right where they are. It takes me far longer than I’d like but I get to the last bag just as Mom stirs a bit in her chair.
She smiles dully at me, eyes half-shut. In a voice thick with sleep she says, “You didn’t have to do that, honey. I was going to get to it once I was done resting my eyes.” She’s looking better than earlier at least.
I shrug. “I needed something to do anyways.” Usually I’d make a jab at her about being lazy, but it doesn’t feel right today.
Mom stretches some more, stands up, then comes to the kitchen. “I’ll finish up here.” She reaches for the bag, but I hand her a single thing instead. She doesn’t say anything, but I catch a yielding smile as she turns away.
Together, we put away the rest of the groceries. I hand things to her and she puts them away on the shelves I can’t reach. Soon, I tell myself.
“You feeling better now?”
“Yeah, I’m fine now.” I stare at the last item from the bag: a jar of spices that goes in the upper cabinets.
“Want to talk about it?”
“Not really.”
“So, I’m assuming it’s more complicated than it seems.”
I nod.
Mom offers her hand. “Then I’ll be here when you’re ready.”
“Thanks, Mom.” I hand her the jar to put away.
She smiles and puts it away, then pulls out a pan. “How’s omurice for dinner sound?”
“Good! If you can manage to keep the omelet in one piece this time, that is.”
“Oh you shush, I’m the one cooking remember?”
“Dead man’s switch. If I don’t personally report back in two hours time they’ll be locking you up for good.” That’s what a dead man’s switch is, right?
We glare at each other for a moment, then burst out laughing. I’m glad we’re able to joke around with each other like this already. It took a lot longer last time.
I gather what ingredients I can reach, then return to my room to let her cook in peace.
Still no Hisao.
To pass the time I pull out the sci-fi book he hyped up a few days ago. My eyes glide over the words blankly and I spend more time re-reading than making any actual progress. This happened last time I tried too. Sorry Hisao, I don’t think this one’s for me.
Setting the novel aside, I turn to my old flame: manga. I’ve been trying to get caught up on my second favorite series so I can start the next volume.
I just hope it has a better ending than the anime-adaptation that finished last year. They had to do an “anime original” ending since the manga’s not done. It was okay, but something was missing. The manga’s path is already a lot better though. Maybe they’ll remake the anime one day with this version of the story. I hope so.
If prosthetic limbs were as advanced in real life as they are in that world then life would be a hell of a lot cooler. I can already picture the school filled with half-metal students. We’d have to have an entire building dedicated to the mechanics needed for their maintenance. I giggle at the image.
I mean, just imagine what I’d be able to do with full-metal legs that flexible! Imagine what Rin could paint! Actually… she’d still probably use her feet and mouth and just use the hands to move stuff or hold coffee. She’d be like an octopus!
The plot of the current volume has slowed down, which I don’t mind because I can tell they’re laying the groundwork for something big.
I’m looking forward to the payoff, but tonight I’m not feeling it. My own mood is somber and I don’t want to read about reflections of war, even if my favorite character’s sister is about to be introduced.
Instead I pick up something more comforting. A series called, ‘The Magician's Code.’
Considering one of the main target audiences for it are mahō shōjo fans, it tends to have a lighter mood, and that’s just what I need right now. It does have its more serious moments due to the fact that it’s not explicitly a mahō shōjo, as it’s more along the lines of a typical fantasy with magical girl elements at the forefront, but we’re not in one of those arcs right now.
The main draw is its power system, which has all the typical layers of complexity you’d normally expect, but then there’s this one final aspect to it that I especially like. Above all else, if a skilled enough magician in the story is able to coordinate their attacks in a specific rhythm, they can cast an even stronger spell by the end. A spell within their spells. And how do they do that? Through Wabun. As the reader you can even catch on to what type of spell they’re casting if you pay close enough attention, so I decided to learn it for that specific purpose. Sometimes it’s the type of spells they’re casting that’s the hint, or it’s hidden in the sound effects around the page, or it’s based on the speed of their attacks and so on.
Who knew I’d ever get to use it in real life?
Just as I start to get into it my phone rings. I close the manga and take a look outside. The sun is getting low in the sky. I pick up the phone and tease, “Took you long enough, Hisao.”
“Sorry to disappoint, but I am not your boyfriend.” Her voice is very different over the phone, so much so I almost don’t recognize it.
“Lilly! Sorry- I was expecting…”
She titters. “Don’t worry, that much was clear. I figured I’d take you up on the offer to hang out if it still stands. How’s this weekend sound? If you’re free of course - I don’t want to impose.”
I collect myself after the surprise. “Oh no, I’m not busy. What were you thinking? A run perhaps?”
I can almost imagine the pout on her face as she says, “Please tell me you weren’t taking my sister seriously.”
“Hahaha! Don’t worry. I‘m just kidding. Probably.” I know others don’t find running as fun and therapeutic as I do. Few do, and Lilly probably isn’t one of them so forcing her to do something she wouldn’t enjoy seems wrong. “Did you want to meet at the Shanghai or something?”
“I like the Shanghai, but I was hoping we could do something more… intimate.” My heart skips a beat and I flush a little. Something about the way she said that word, which she definitely doesn’t mean in any way beyond familiar and private… close and together – at which I shiver again. She knows I’m in a relationship! I know I’m in a relationship! Besides she doesn’t… and I don’t…
“If you would prefer the Shanghai,” while I’m cooling myself down, Lilly keeps talking, “... we can – of course – meet there. I thought it might be nice to have a tea party in my room–” another squirm – “Hanako tells me they’re quite nice.”
Her and Hanako…? No! I need to lay off Mimuro’s manga recommendations – this is completely innocent.
“A t-tea party?” And speaking of Mimi- Ah! Later!
“Does it sound that scary?” She giggles. “You don’t have to wear a fancy dress; Hanako and I usually wear our pajamas.” A pause in which my stomach turns over. “You can think of it as a sleep-over where we happen to be drinking tea, if it helps.”
No, no it doesn’t!
Lilly must take my silence for reluctance. “I know it’s out of the way for you, but Akira can pick you up. She can even take you home if you do not want to stay. She said she should have the night off so she’ll be able to join us.”
I give my head a shake and pull myself together. All we’re talking about is a tea party. There’s nothing else happening except someone who seems to want to be my friend inviting me to a tea party. And what the hell, why not? “Sure then, I’d be happy to join you. Sounds like it could be fun. Do I need to bring anything?”
“All you need is to come dressed in something comfy.” Which means something casual. Nothing more.
“Then I’ll do that.” I can hear Lilly beaming into the phone. As we settle the when and where, I am reminded that Lilly is just a floor below myself and Rin.
Speaking of Rin, I didn’t check on or even see her earlier. I think that must’ve been the first time in a long time I had been on campus without running into her, deliberately or otherwise. I wonder how she’s doing. Without me nagging her to do the laundry she tends to forget. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s run out of clean clothes or – more likely – she got so focused on a painting again that she just ends up sleeping in her clothes. The thought makes me giggle.
The phone must’ve picked it up because Lilly asks, “Did I say something strange?”
“No, no, sorry. Just had a funny thought. You haven’t seen Rin at all, have you?”
“Hmm. No, I haven’t run into Rin yet,” Lilly says after a pause, “but Ooe and I were discussing who had stayed over the summer and she did not mention Rin. Do you want me to go looking for her?” Ooe? That name sounds familiar, but I can’t place it. Lilly’s insistence on using people’s family names even at Yamaku would be less annoying if she were at least consistent with it.
“Nah, I’m not worried about Rin. She knows what’s what and I’ll visit her sooner or later.”
“Oh? Perhaps you have an idea as to where she went in that case?”
Since when was Lilly interested in Rin’s whereabouts? I wonder if she’s ‘adopting’ Rin and I now, the way she did Hanako. On one hand it’d be a welcome boost to our social status, on the other I’m not sure I like the picture it’d paint. “She said she might visit her parents over break – that, or she went and worked on that art exhibit she was talking about.” I know which I’d have preferred but I wasn’t going to force her.
“And she didn’t tell you before the break started?”
I giggle. “She didn’t tell me because she probably didn’t know for sure yet what she wanted to do. If she is visiting her parents she’ll probably be back soon.” It’s probably not worth thinking too hard about.
“And what about the art exhibit? I did not believe she was… interested in exhibiting her art.”
“Well, she wasn’t at first, but her teacher really wanted her to do it. He said it’d be a good thing for Rin, so I tried knocking some sense into her.”
“Hopefully in a reasonable way and not the same way you knocked something into Hisao.”
“Oh- you actually remember that?” I forgot Lilly was there for that. Not my proudest moment.
Lilly laughs. “He brought it up last week when Akira and I visited him.”
“That jerk. He’s definitely gonna get it for that!”
“Please don’t hound him on my account. It would be difficult to forget seeing as it’s one of the few times we’ve talked.”
“If you say so.” My cheeks burn a little, but I continue, “So Saturday it is then? Looking forward to it!”
Either Lilly doesn’t catch my change of subject or she lets me get away with it. Knowing her, I have a feeling it’s the latter. “Yes, Saturday works wonderfully for me. And you won’t have trouble getting here by four?”
“I don’t see why I would; there’s a bus around then. Which means it’s officially a date!”
“Oh my! What would Hisao think?” Damn, I was hoping she would be more flustered by that comment. That must’ve been too vanilla. I was playing it safe because it’s Lilly I’m working with here and I didn’t want to overstep, but it looks like I’ll have to step up my game instead. Also, is she okay with that sort of thing then? Maaaybe it was just too tame either way…
“He’s screwing around with the Nurse, so it’s just payback.”
“What!” There it is! Lilly’s voice cracks, which must be a first. Not to mention that reaction time. Must be a record for Lilly!
I explode into a loud fit of laughter. Lilly doesn’t make a sound on the other end of the line and I worry maybe I went too far after all, so I force myself to calm down. “I’m kidding, it’s an inside joke.”
“I’ve never heard such jokes about the Nurse like that.”
“Then you haven’t been around him enough, so you can count yourself lucky.”
“Well, in that case I look forward to our… revenge party, Emi. Thank you for accepting the invite.” Lilly’s taking it well it seems. I was worried for nothing. We might be able to get along after all.
“Thanks for inviting me! This’ll be fun.”
“I certainly hope so. Speaking of your boyfriend, weren’t you expecting a call from Hisao?”
I look out the window. The sun’s dipping into the horizon. “I think he might’ve fallen asleep but yeah, I was expecting a call.”
“Well then, I best not keep the line busy too long. Until Saturday!”
“Thanks Lilly, see you then!”
We hang up and I reach for my manga. I’m halfway through the first page when my phone rings again. This time I make sure to look at the number before picking up. There he is. “You’re late, Hisao...”
Turns out Hisao has had a hell of a day too. His dad dropped ‘a bombshell’ – as Hisao described it – on him: his friends know he’s in town and Hisao thinks they’re gonna show up at his doorstep. It might be a good thing for him to talk it out with them.
I hope it goes well for him. I’ve seen it go both ways for people at Yamaku.
As the call goes on we start teasing each other and the nagging sensation that something is wrong comes back. It feels normal. Too normal. Is this how Hisao felt before we talked about Dad? A growing, invisible tension building up in the background with every word. I can’t relax at all. And this is what I put Hisao through? Maybe… maybe I really do deserve all of this.
And the fact I did this and then some to… well, I can’t imagine going through this for months on end.
Hisao comments that Lilly and I are an odd couple and I have to hold back a snicker from our earlier joke. We just never ended up talking much since she was on the student council and I am- was- will continue to be on the track team. Not to mention being in two entirely different classes.
Plus she has Hanako to deal with, though she did that to herself. Lilly’s motherly streak meant Hanako latching onto her like a child was almost inevitable. Wait, wasn’t Lilly planning on leaving? Where would that put Hanako? I mean, they’ve only been friends for the past year and a half so Hanako was getting by without Lilly, but I don’t think I ever saw her talk to anyone before then. Who knows, maybe she’s changed since then.
This weekend will also give me the chance to see what Lilly’s like outside of school too, which is exciting. She’s always so measured and slow at school! She walks slowly and talks slowly but I know she’s not thinking slowly. It makes me feel sleepy, like what I think hypnosis would feel like, and then she hits you with something sharp and wakes you right up.
I suspect there’s more to her than that; there’s always more to learn about people, as I’m discovering the hard way.
I’ve been involuntarily tapping on the desk for a while, but stop once I find an opportunity to tease Hisao. I playfully snap back at Hisao. “Oh shut it. Jerk. I can be friends with whoever I want.”
“I never said you couldn’t?” He chuckles nervously.
“Exactly!”
“Okay?”
“Yep.” I declare having rightfully won the conversation. Hisao starts to laugh and I can’t help but join in.
And yet… something is off. Maybe I’m just overthinking everything. I should just come out and ask Hisao what’s going on. Chances are it’s nothing and I’m sick of sitting here all day worrying for no reason. “Hey, Hi-”
His laugh peters off suddenly. “Huh?” He cuts me off in a way that makes me think something else caught his attention. I guess we’re not talking about it tonight then…
After he doesn’t elaborate for a few seconds I ask, “What is it?”
“Something just…” He pauses for a moment longer and my eye twitches. “Ahh. I see now.”
Has he forgotten I’m on the phone? My leg starts shaking impatiently. His inability to keep me in the loop is starting to get a little irritating. Am I still talking about this conversation? “I don’t.”
“I think I have visitors.” Hey, an answer! Huzzah!
“Oh?” Translation: Give me literally any more information.
“Mai and Shin are outside tossing rocks at my window.”
Like, in a movie? I thought that only happened in shitty rom-cons, kids movies, and really old books. “That seems… archaic.”
“It’s what we always used to do.” Also, doesn’t that scratch the window? I’m sure his parents can’t appreciate that too much.
Either way though it’s time for him to finally confront them. The fact they approached him first is a good sign, I think. “Looks like you’re gonna be going then.”
“Seems like it. Wish me luck?” I wince and force myself to forgive him for using that expression. He doesn’t know why I don’t like it and it’s commonplace and appropriate for the circumstances, like asking about the weather. Still doesn’t make it sting any less.
Whatever else is eating at the back of my mind can screw right off. “Don’t rely on luck. You’ve got this, Hisao!”
“Thanks. Talk to you later then?”
I really hope so - and I mean really talk. I guess ‘she’ really is awake again. “Yep. Love ya!”
“Love you too.” The line goes dead and I lower the phone onto the desk.
Then I raise my hands in front of me, inspecting them closely. They’re still dry from this past week’s weather and healing all those scratches. I move them to the sides of my head, then clap them onto my face hard enough to clear my head.
What am I on about?
I shake away the stinging in my cheeks. Hisao and I are fine. He’s got a lot on his mind, his body is in shambles, and he’s probably worried about me. I’m still not used to having someone worry about me like that beside Mom and Shige, but I’m starting to like it so long as it’s coming from him. And it’s not like it’s unjustified this time either. My leg is pretty jacked up and the last time he saw me in a wheelchair I was a mess.
Point is we are fine and I need to stop whining.
The urge to go for a run is hard to ignore when I start getting like this. How the hell do people sit inside and do nothing all day everyday? It’s been a week and a half and I feel like I’m going crazy already.
Reminds me of when I was going through physical therapy all those years ago and had no choice but to sit around doing nothing. I could barely sit still and it started affecting my mood. I had a short temper and would get frustrated more easily. Mom picked up on it, since it was around then that she brought me a stack of well-worn manga on a whim - or so I thought. She didn’t tell me at the time, but the truth is they were Dad’s. Apparently, he would hide in his little office nook and read them late at night when nobody was awake to interrupt him, so Mom thought it might help keep me busy and that I might like them too.
The one Mom brought me was the start of a popular Shonen Jump series about a goofy pirate crew searching for a specific piece of treasure, or something like that. It’s been a while since I read or watched any of it.
After that, It didn’t take long for me to get hooked on the stuff. I guess that first manga is probably where I got the idea of writing “pirate” down for my career survey. I think that one is still going at this point, and I’m probably a few hundred episodes behind in the anime. I guess I wouldn’t mind getting back into it now that I have some free time. Plus it helped distract me, which manga seems to still be able to do. That reminds me, I need to finish the first one I was getting into before the calls and this whole train of thought.
Just as I open the thing I am interrupted again by the sound of my mother calling me for dinner. I had almost forgotten about that. Almost. I shout back at her and close the manga for a third time tonight. I’ll get back to it later.
Table of Contents | Previous Scene: Scene 5 - Chapter 1: Prelude to Doubt | Next Scene: Scene 5 - Chapter 3: Dinner and a Late Night Talk
Thanks to Stiles for editing! And special thanks for pushing the conversation with Lilly in a direction that I think is much more fun than I had it originally play out! I love how that scene came together and the implications/effects it does/will have.
This was also shorter chapter compared to what came before - about the same length as the previous one - and as I said, going forward this is about the length you should expect for the most chapters, but that being said, the next one will be a big one! Again, still a far cry from the earlier chapters, but it approaches my new "max length" that I intend to enforce going forward. Usually chapters of this length are reserved for chapters that have important conversations or events that simply can't be split up further. Hope you look forward to it!
As for this chapter, we finally get to see Emi's side of the phone conversation from Scene 3! This wasn't originally in my plans, in fact there was a point where I hadn't even necessarily planned alternate POV's, but I've said it before and I'll keep on saying it: this isn't just Hisao's story. I don't plan on repeating conversations and such often, in fact I want to try to keep that to a minimum, but sometimes there's enough of a difference from the other perspective to make it worthwhile and I believe this is one of those times. I believe it also helps keep the timeline easier to keep in order. Though, again, it is a technique I plan to use as sparingly as possible. It'd be somewhat hypocritical of me to do otherwise. Just wanted to get ahead of that, if anyone who had read my comment on Developments is here.
In any case, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and are ready for the next, and final chapter of Scene 5! Thanks for reading and all the fun comments! It's always a joy to see what people have to think on the events of the story.
I believe a given name is one's first name, you're thinking of surnames/family names.