Beyond The Haze : A Lilly pseudo-route - II-14 added 13-10-2024

[Razoredge]

I can't believe I do such mistakes once again. Thanks for pointing this out.
For what you said after, in fact, I have a plot written for every scene, and my plot is written until the end of act III for now. I don't want to justify what I have done, but, you see, I don't write a scene after someone told me to do something. I should do it, it may be better, I don't know. But, trust me, this condition will be useful for the final plot.

Any review will be useful to rewrite the plot if needed. I know where I want to go, I know what I want to say, but maybe I don't write it the right way. That being said, I didn't mean to rewrite a Hisao scene.

But yeah, I don't know what to say, but thanks, and I will take any review to rewrite my plot. And I hope it will be better for everyone. Because I want to improve.

[Mirage_GSM]

I don't write a scene after someone told me to do something. I should do it, it may be better, I don't know.

As a general rule you should not write any scene just because one of your readers tells you to. You're the one who knows your story and where you want it to go.
A reader can tell you what did and what did not work (and most of the time that will be subjective). At best they can make a suggestion on how to fix a problem - but you shouldn't let anyone tell you where to take your story.

[Razoredge]

I don't let anyone told me what to do with my stories, don't worry

But I take reviews seriously to improve myself, that's what I wanted to say.

[Razoredge]

For this chapter, here's a little piece of art I got from Rtil, I have to say I really like this piece. Thank you, buddy, in the event that you're potentially reading something like this.



Warm reunion

The last week was pretty boring. At least, I tried to do my best to avoid doing stupid things since the tournament. Luckily, Saki isn't mad at me anymore, and that's all that matters to me.

I still feel a residual pain in my chest, but it's usual when you're dumb enough to deny your own limits. It will pass, I need some time for that. It can't be painful forever, but patience is not my strength sometimes. I have to deal with it anyway.

I woke up later this morning, just because Nurse told me to avoid swimming for a few days. So, my entire day is free, but I don't know what to do this morning. However, I'm hungry, so it could be a good idea to get something to eat. I put my clothes on, and I leave the dorm to reach the refectory. The weather isn't nice at all, but nevermind, it's just a quick walk.

There's a lot of students in the refectory, and that's normal given how late I woke up. But it doesn't matter because I have all my time. In the queue, I can choose collectedly what I want to eat. And for once, I will change my habits, a bit.

I will take a miso soup, a bit of salmon and some cucumber and everything will be fine. Salmon is my favorite fish, even if I'm not really fond of these things. When my turn comes, I choose what I want to eat, and I look for an empty seat. I don't recognize anyone there, but this is not a problem for now. Sometimes, I like to eat alone, but not so much, so I try to avoid it as much as I can.

I begin to eat, and I already know that everything will disappear in less than 15 minutes. It's a fact, I eat quickly, even Saki often tells me to eat slower, but I can't change my habits like that.

While I'm eating, I wonder why I can do this afternoon. I don't really want to read a book, so hanging out with Saki or Lilly would be a good thing. Nevertheless, I have to finish my breakfast before doing anything. The fish is delicious, even if it's not a big piece. I should have taken more of it, but I think this is enough. Then, I take a sip of my soup. Not too warm but not cold at all. I don't really like to eat soups, but this time, I can make an exception.

In three or four swallows, my bowl is empty. For my taste, a little bit of salt would have been fantastic, but I have to avoid it for the sake of my heart. Last but not least, the cucumber is a bit vinegared, but I love this taste, so it doesn't matter. It may be weird, but I eat cucumbers only in a salad, it's a habit I've had since my youth. A bit more of vinegar would have been great, but I have to deal with it.

When my plate is empty, I take my tray, and I leave this table. On my way to the dorm, I wonder what I can do this afternoon. Mom didn't call me this morning, but maybe she's busy at home, so I'm not worried at all.

That being said, the simple fact to take my uniform off is a real pleasure. I don't really like this thing, but I have to wear it every day because the rules are the rules. I already know what kind of clothes I want to wear today. A light blue tank top with blue jeans and sneakers will be a perfect choice. Some students stroll with their uniforms, the others wear casual clothes. Everyone does what they like after all.

In my room, I toss my uniform on my chair. In underwear, I go through my locker to find the clothes I want. When I put my jeans on, someone knocks at the door. I don't bother to pull my tank top on, I'm in my room in the girls' dorm, I have nothing to fear.

I open the door and see a girl in front of me. I'm still a bit tired, so I don't remember her face, but something catches my attention. I know that smell, it's Saki's perfume. I know her smell by heart, and I know I can't make a mistake on this subject. But today, her hairdo is a bit different, I don't even know why. At least, this is what I see, even with her usual haircut I can't recognize her without her smell.

She hugs me frankly and comes into my room. Saki seems that she wants to tell me something, so I let her speak.

"It seems that you're ready. Great, I hope you have nothing to do today because I have something for you."

"I guess you don't want to tell me what you want to do because you would have told me already. Go ahead, I follow you." I answer to her.

I take my wallet anyway, and we leave the dorm. I have no idea where we're going, but I trust Saki. As we leave the school, we see two adults next to the gate. When we reach them, they pass from being unknown to well-known people.

I know this perfume and the woman who wears it. She's my mother, this fragrance with lime can't lie. The man next to her has a necklace with a silver pearl, and it makes me smile greatly. He's my father, and I pounce on him instantly. I missed him so much, and I'm glad to see him. Now, I understand why Mom didn't call me this morning, they prepared a surprise for me. It seems that Dad takes his day off just for me. I don't want to know why, I'm just happy to see my parents.

"Dad, you finally came. I have a lot of things to say, you know."

So, we are going to town together. On the way, I speak a lot with my parents, while Saki walks next to me, arm in arm with me. They ask me a lot of questions about school. When dad asks me how it goes when I swim, I stay quiet for a few seconds, looking at Saki with a worried air. I don't really want to worry my father about my heart problems and my own stupidity. However, I want to be honest with them.

"I screwed up last week, we had a swimming tournament, and I pushed myself too hard. So, my heart failed..." Obviously, they are very worried, it's only because of me.

"However, I gave her a lecture, and she understood, so everything is fine." Saki, with her words, achieves to calm my parents down. I admire her a lot in this matter.

When we arrive in the town next to the school, my parents are looking everywhere. In three years, they never came here, and it seems they're happy to be there.

We do some window shopping, and when we reach a book shop, Saki keeps me out. I know her by heart, and she does something like that to buy me a present. Anyway, I'll do the same, so whatever. When she does her shopping, I ask a lot of questions to my father. How it goes at work, at home, if he sleeps well, that kind of things. I know that he's worried about me, but I'm concerned about him too.

I would have liked him to take care of himself, but he's kind of stubborn. Like father, like daughter, and there's nothing we can do about that. Notwithstanding, I'd like him to listen to me, sometimes.

I also told them that I met a girl. Mom looks at me with a kind smile because she's aware of my orientation. I think she's making assumptions, but I'm not sure, I'm not in her head. At least they're happy that I meet some new friends.

Saki takes her time in the shop. She always takes her time while she buys something to me as if she wants to buy the perfect gift. I have nothing to say about that, I can spend an entire hour looking for a specific figurine or book for her. She leaves the shop after fifteen minutes, and hide something behind her back. However, she doesn't waste time and tells me that she has a book for me. My best friend's smile can't lie, she's happy to give me a gift.

Saki gives me a book about Japanese mythology, my favorite subject aside from Japanese history. I'm glad to receive this gift from her, and I hug her frankly. She puts her head against my neck as I hold her tight. She knows me by heart and knows how to please me, so I'm pleased. Any excuse is good for hugging her, I can do it whenever I want. While I'm hugging her, I wonder what I can buy to her in the future. I don't owe anything, but I want to please her too.

I kiss her on the forehead as I thank her. I don't have enough money for her gift, so we'll have to wait a bit. My book under my arm, I want to show the city's park to my parents. I love this place, it's a spot where I like to go alone or with Saki. It's a peaceful and lovely place, with plenty of shade. During the summer, you have to go there if you want to cool off a bit.

When we reach the park, we sit down under a sakura. These cherry trees are beautiful, and I won't miss their bloom for anything in the world. The weather is pretty nice, and I lay down in the grass like I did when I was younger. When I do this with people I love, I lose track of time. I don't know what time is it, and I don't give a fuck, I just want to enjoy this moment. A light breeze blows, as Saki asks questions about my childhood. She's curious, and that's pretty cute, I have to admit.

So, she learns a lot of things about my childhood. The cartoons I used to watch when I was a child, the food I liked to eat, or even the type of books I read. She seems to be very interested in these details, as much as I am interested in further information about her childhood too. We talk a lot about my childhood and some other stuff. I love laying down in the grass, but all good things must come to an end, and we have to go back to the school. However, I want to take my time, there's no reason to hurry.

On our way back, my parents give me some pocket money, as they usually do. I never asked for it, but it's a habit for them. I thank them as much as I can, even if I protest a bit against this particular amount. They need their money much more than I need it, and they know that.

I was thrilled to see my parents, and especially my father. They gave me a nice surprise, and that's why I love them. When we reach the school, I don't want them to leave now. Nevertheless, I'm not a child anymore, so it's time for me to say goodbye. I hug both of them as much as I can, but I've got to let them go. Mom promises me to call me every Sunday, and dad promises me to come more often. As they leave, Saki smiles.

"I like your parents, they're nice, I have to say," Saki says to me with a cute tone.

"And they like you a lot. Every time I speak with them, they ask how you are doing." I answer, with a smile.

"You're lucky to be their daughter. And they're lucky to be your parents. You're so cute when you are together."

I already know what to do now that we're alone. Spending my evening with my best friend. It is an excellent program, in my opinion. I've never been disappointed while spending time with her. And I cherish every second we spend together, because of our mutual condition. We have to look straight ahead, and that's what we do every day.

[Razoredge]

Try not converted

Spending time with my parents made me happy, and thanks to this, I can start the week in the right way. We have an entire week free before starting the festival's preparations. I really like to help my classmates during this preparatory process, as much as I can. Sometimes, when I have some free time, I offer my help to the other classes. This week, however, we have some exams, but I'm confident, I work as hard as I can.

I have three exams. History, English, and Science. I'm only afraid of the science exam because I've got significant gaps in this matter, even if I try my best. For the other matters, I'm still confident. Everything will start this afternoon with the History exam. I'm not stressed at all, there's no reason to fear anything. If I work hard, I can do it, that's all.

I reach my classroom earlier than the majority of students. When I enter the room, we are just 4 or 5 people, nothing else. Learning kanjis early in the morning is not my strong point, I have to say. But if I want to read a newspaper with ease, I need to know how to read these signs.

Twenty minutes later, the lesson begins. This week, we continue to learn how to read and write the same ten kanjis than the last week. I write down a kanji stroke by stroke, following the writing direction. Then I write some examples to know how to use it in a sentence, with the pronunciation.

The teacher gives us sheets with writing exercises, with today's kanjis and previous ones. My level is not as good as I wanted it to be, but it's quite okay for now. For some signs, I have to read my notes to answer questions. But it's not a shame, some students need to do this too, I can see it in the classroom.

Nevertheless, I love to do calligraphy, especially at home; for me, it's beautiful. My calligraphy skills are not that great, because I'm not good with a brush in hand. Although if I try my hardest, it's a total mess.

My neighbor asks me for help because she sees that I'm three steps ahead of her. She doesn't understand the meaning of a specific kanji, and I give her some examples. It takes less than a minute for her to understand, and she thanks me with a smile.

The teacher picks up random sheets for grades, and she takes mine. My exercises are done just a few minutes before the end of the lesson. Not my best work, but I did my best, that's all that matters. The other classes of the morning are science, Japanese literature, and maths.

Maths is a pain in the ass for me, I don't know why but I hate this subject. During this kind of lesson, I'm counting every minute until the end because maths bores me. I'm a wordsmith, after all, not a scientist.

............................

After lunch, the real fun begins, with our History exam. I still come earlier than the other students, and I'm preparing myself mentally. I do it every time I need to pass an exam, it's a simple habit. Everything will be fine, I know that, but you can't change a habit that easily.

When everyone is here, the test begins. We have to answer questions by developing each answer. The period covered is wide, but it's not a problem for me. I start to answer these questions when the teacher gives me the sheet.

I have to name a few eras, and why they're called like that. It's pretty easy, and if you work a bit, these are easy points. It becomes a bit harder when we have to explain the primary trigger of specific wars. I don't know everything, of course, but I try to answer these questions with my own words. The last questions are harder than I thought, and I can't answer two or three of these. But I think I did a good job, I don't have to feel ashamed. Four or five minutes before the end, I'm done, and I surprise myself daydreaming.

When the English teacher comes into the classroom, I hope that this exam would be reading comprehension. And thank god, when she gives us our test, we have to read a text and answer questions. However, I have to admit, at first glance, this text is a lot harder than the previous ones. But this is the principle of a test, testing our knowledge and understanding. After reading, I pluck my courage to answer these questions. I try to understand one question after another.

The first ones are pretty easy, that being said, but it gets worse after the fourth one. I try to gather my knowledge, and I'm progressing slowly. If this exam is a total mess, the next one will end me. At least, I'm trying my best, but I already know that it won't be enough. At the end of the test, I was able to answer only ten of the fifteen questions we had. Though my last answers are short to save time, it won't work, I know that. I sigh when I return my copy to the teacher. I'm not proud of myself, but what's done is done.

Just a few moments before the Science test begins, I look around me. Fortunately, I'm not the only one who seems to be helpless. I work as hard as I can, but sometimes, it's not enough to fill my gaps.

When I see the topic of the exam, I'm astonished. We saw this subject in class, that's a fact, but I didn't understand a thing when we saw it. I already know that this one will be a total mess. However, I have to try a bit; otherwise, I won't be able to do it later. Calculations are harder than I expected, given that I'm failing science and maths, it's a nightmare for me. At least a few questions are easy, but it won't give me a good grade. Most of my classmates are as lost as I can be right now.

Time is running out quickly, a little too fast from my point of view. I get confused a bit, and I make some mistakes, without realizing it. That happens a lot in this matter, even though I'm trying as hard as I can. At the end of the test, I answered only half of the questions, which isn't a good thing at all.

Luckily, I can make up later, it's not over yet. The year is not over, and the most important exams will arrive later. I have the time for their preparation, and I will work a lot on that. Thankfully, it's over for today, and now, I can do what I want.

I go back to the dorm to put my school stuff on my desk. Today, I have to give a book back to Yuuko, and I won't borrow a new book. Saki bought me a nice one, and I have to read it. On my way, I wonder which grade I will receive for each test.

Notwithstanding, something draws my attention in front of the dorm. A guy leaves the building and acts strangely as if something or someone was against him. I've seen him before, but I don't know who he is, for me, he's just a random guy with glasses and a scarf. I wonder what happened as he runs to the main building. That was weird, but these things happen sometimes. When I reach my bedroom, I put my stuff on my desk, and I take my book. Now, time to head for the library.

I get there quickly, and the first thing I do, before giving back my book, is talking a bit with Yuuko. She has a lot of work at the Shanghai, a part-time job for her. I admire her because I already know that I won't be able to do such a thing.

I give the book back to her, and I leave her because, behind me, students need to borrow books. Roaming in the library, I look for an empty table to sit down a bit, unsuccessfully. Sitting down with someone I know would be a good thing, but with my trouble, it's not really easy.

I'm looking for a familiar face, in vain. In fact, details are more important for me than an entire face, because this is the only thing I can remember. And obviously, sometimes, I remember details, a name, and a few days later, I can't remember this name anymore. Suddenly, I see a blonde hair girl with a black ribbon in her hair. I know her, and above all, I like her. Sometimes, I have her name on the tip of my tongue, but it won't come out. If I want to remember her face, it's a lost cause, I will never be able to do it.

For example, Saki's face is a total blur to me, and my parents' faces too. Nevertheless, I sit down in front of her quietly, but she notices it and smiles kindly.

" Hi, Lilly, I'm glad to see you." Today, her name comes out instantly.

" Hello, Kaori, I'm glad you're here too. How was your day?" She asks, with a concerned tone.

" Not so good. We have three tests today, and two of these were a total mess. Especially the science one, the English test was not so bad." I sigh a bit, peeved.

" You know, you don't always have to do everything right. Mistakes are useful to allow you to progress. You can't make a mistake if you never try, so consider it a good thing." She says to me with a smile.

As we are in the library, we speak with a quiet tone, so as not to disturb the other students. I have to say, Lilly is kind to me, and I like her for that.

" I know that, but I'm still annoyed. I work as hard as I can, and sometimes, it's not enough. And I don't know what to do when it happens."

" You need help, that's all. I'm pretty sure you'll find people inclined to help you, as I do in English when you need it." She's right, and I know that.

" Yeah, you're right. But, you know, sometimes, I'm too proud to ask help on a particular subject. Even if I try to make an effort, I can't change this state of affairs." I'm not complaining at all, she needs to understand some facts.

" That's why friends are there for you. They understand, and at least they try to help. You can ask me whatever you want, I'll try to help you if I can." She answers me with a motherly tone.

" You can ask me whatever you want too, it's the least I can do for you in return," I declare, and she thanks me for that.

" Do you know what your class will do for the festival?" She asks me as if she already knows what they'll do.

" I don't know yet. However, I'll help my classmates as usual. Even our class delegate, although I don't like her. I can't remember her face, notwithstanding I remember all her acts. " It seems that she knows her well, given how much she sniggers.

" It's the right mindset, you should be proud of yourself. Some people can't put their disagreements aside, but at least you try." She smiles at me as she changes the subject of our conversation.

Like that, Lilly informs me that her class will run some food stands. It's a good idea which always works. A festival without food isn't a real festival, in my opinion. We'll have a very full schedule next week to prepare the festival.

" If I have enough time, I'll help you if you want. I'll do it for Saki this year, so feel free to ask me something." Offering her my help makes sense to me, and she thanks me again.

Then, we stay quiet, talking just a bit about insignificant things, until we leave the library together. On our way to the dorm, she tells me that her sister would come soon. Asking some questions, I learn that her name is Akira and that she's a lawyer. I'm actually impressed, I have to say. It's a very difficult job, and I already know what I won't be able to do something like that. I'm the only daughter of my parents, so I'm a bit envious. Saki is the closest thing to a sister for me, even if it isn't the same thing.

Before we split, she tells me that her tea invitation still stands. I wonder if this invitation hides the fact that she wants to see me more often. That being said, I want to see her more often, so it's beneficial for us. Saki would push me to do it anyway.

When I reach my room, I lay on my bed, and I start reading my new book bought by my best friend. When the first pages grab my attention like that, I know that my reading will be a real pleasure. I was never wrong about that.

[Razoredge]

Class support

Thankfully, we had only three tests last week. This week is different in every way because we have some work to do for the festival. Therefore, we will have half of our afternoons free, which is useful to work on our class projects. Our homeroom teacher tells us what we will do this year. It seems that our stands would be varied, which is an excellent idea to me. I like to do different things and always try to fight routine. That being said, I have to admit that I have a routine sometimes.

Then our science lesson begins. My science test was a total mess, so I'm taking notes even more than usual. Getting bad grades is a thing, but I want to improve, and I'll do everything I can in that direction.

During the class, I ask some questions, like a few students. The teacher seems to be really happy to see students who are interested in his matter. I'm not a scientist, I know that, but I love discovering new things. I still don't understand some things, but I can ask some questions to the teacher later, he's inclined to help us as much as he can. When the lesson is over, I learned a few things about geothermal energy, which was the aim of the teacher.

When our English teacher comes, we know that today's lesson will be dedicated to oral expression. I curse my accent, which is literally awful. Even if I try my best to improve my pronunciation, I can't manage to do such a thing. We have an Indian student in our class, I think, and I have to admit, her pronunciation is almost perfect, with a cute accent. Such as Lilly's accent, even if it's not the same.

The teacher gives us a text to read. The Indian student begins with the hardest part of the text, and I'm the second one who reads. And as expected, I'm butchering everything with my accent, but the teacher helps me to pronounce some words. I understand what I read, that's not the problem, but sometimes, I don't know how to read some words, even if I know what they mean. As I finish reading, I keep a low profile, blushing with embarrassment.

Lilly told me that I don't always have to do everything right, and these words persist in my head. Maybe I won't be able to get rid of my accent, it doesn't matter after all. Learning English is essential for me because one day I could leave Japan and work abroad.

At least most of the students in this class have the same accent, so I'm not alone in my embarrassment. When the last student has read the last sentence, the teacher asks us some questions about this text. The first ones are pretty easy, so I let my comrades trying to answer. However, the last one is the hardest, but I want to try this time. In my own words, I try to explain how the character is affected in his life by the death of his father. However, I miss a few things, but at least I tried. I will make progress only if I try to participate in class.

During the other lessons of this morning, we have some exercises to do. I have to say, I like to do exercises in class, it allows us to make some progress over time. Nevertheless, this time, I take my time to do things well. This morning was not so bad, and we have a lot of work to do this afternoon.

............................................................

After only one lesson, we have some free time to work on our class projects for the festival. I already know what I'll do today, the same thing as the last year, in other words working on the stands. I'm not a handywoman, but everyone's help is appreciated.

While some boys begin to work on some boards outside, I take a black paint jar to write things on a white streamer. No fancy stuff, just the name of the products sold there, written in big characters to be seen from far away. I do my utmost to make a clean and nice streamer. This is the easiest thing to do, and in an hour or two, all our streamers are done. Some of these are beautiful, I have to say, but not the ones I did. Someone tells us that the boys outside need some help with the boards, and I offer my support, just like some students.

Nailing boards together is not a hard thing to do, but you need help to line these boards up, especially when they're heavy like these. Everybody plays his part in it, but it'll take time. Our class delegate waves her hands for supervising our work. I really don't like her, but I need to help her because she's one of my classmates. I want to do well, therefore I put my principles aside for now. My parents didn't raise me to feel hate and anger against someone. But sometimes, I can't get rid of it, in particular when someone sees me as a weakened woman.

As we work together, we advance a bit slower than I thought, but nevermind. We have a whole week to prepare our project, and it will be necessary because we don't have the same pace as the other classes. Thankfully, we can get back into the main building a few moments before it starts raining. Somehow, I didn't see it coming, maybe because I was absorbed into my work. It rains a lot, and I fulminate against the weather because I would have to run to reach the dorm.

However, just a few moments before I reach Lilly's classroom, her friend asks me if I could come with her. Sometimes, I can remember her name, but not today. Naturally, I say yes to her, and we take our time on our way. She looks down as if she was felt embarrassed by something. I know that I have to handle her with kid gloves, but I don't know what to say to cheer her up. I don't even know how Lilly manages to do things with her without frightening her.

When we reach Lilly's classroom, everyone is busy, and it seems to be a big mess. Notwithstanding, it appears that everything is in its place because I can't see anybody looking for a particular thing in the classroom. I guess blind people have their own sense of order.

The girl with dark purple hair runs towards Lilly when she sees her. I smile while they're hugging, it's pretty cute, I have to say. I watch my steps, I don't want to walk on their streamers after all.

"Hi, Lilly, glad to see you."

"Hi, Kaori," Lilly says. "What can I do for you?"

"Nothing. I'm here to help you a bit, as I promised you."

"That's really nice of you, thanks." She answers me, smiling.

She seems to be really happy to know that I'm here for her. I see her as a kind of friend, so for me, it's normal to do things for my friends. I ask her what I can do, and she asks me to give her some stuff. I roam in her classroom, looking for a big brush, a red paint jar, sheets of paper, and a pair of scissors. When I give her everything, she explains to me what I can do with the paper and the scissors. With a pencil, I write some prominent characters on the paper before cutting holes. Like that, I give Lilly a template to allow her to paint her streamer.

She can't make a mess because it's big enough to do a clean banner. I was afraid that she would take this really bad, it's silly, I know, because she told me to do so. Then, Hanako asks me to paint some things with her to help Lilly. Yeah, it seems that her name is Hanako, I don't even know why I forget it sometimes. With Lilly on her side, she's happy, and above all, she smiles. And I have to admit, her smile is as Saki's smile, a precious little thing.

With our help, her work gets somewhere a bit faster, and Lilly thanks us for that. It's not a big deal, but it seems that it means a lot to her. I'm pretty sure she would have done the same for us.

"Do you want me to do something else?" I ask. "I still have some free time."

"You know, you helped me a lot, you've done enough for today," Lilly answers, smiling with her eyes closed.

"We could... have some tea... if you want to..." Hanako adds, with a small voice, maybe because she realizes that I'm here.

"What a nice idea." I declare. "Drinking tea with nice girls is always a good thing."

Lilly snorts with amusement, and we leave her classroom a few moments after because she had to do some things for her classmates. I don't know why, but it seems that some students see her as a second mother. I find this cute, I have to admit.

On our way, Hanako is silent, looking at the floor, and walking next to Lilly. I guess it's unimaginable to think that she could survive a school year without Lilly. In fact, it's the same case for me, I couldn't survive a year without Saki.

When we reach our destination, I intend to make some tea. The girls tell me their favorite tastes, and I cope with the teapot. A vanilla scent tea for Lilly, and a standard black tea for Hanako. I'll take a blueberry tea to change a bit.

"Oh, Lilly, we'll have a new student this week." Hanako addresses to her friend. "I don't know exactly which day, but Mutou told us to be nice to him."

"A new student? Nice, I wasn't aware of that." I blurt. "Maybe I was daydreaming when he informed us."

"You don't have to be ashamed. Mutou is an excellent teacher, but sometimes, he is a bit soporific for some students." Lilly chuckles.

When our tea is finally ready, I join them around the table, waiting for my drink to cool off. I can hear the rain intensifying outside, and I'm glad to be there with them. When my tea is drinkable, I take a sip, enjoying a taste I didn't have for years.

" Have you seen your parents recently, Kaori?" Lilly asks with nosiness.

" Yeah, they surprised me to come when I didn't expect it. I had a good time with them and Saki, they like her a lot. What about you?" I ask in return.

Lilly takes a sip of tea and closes her eyes. " My parents live in Scotland, so it's hard for them to come to Japan. To be honest, I don't think that they would even want it to happen." she murmurs.

I look at my feet, once again, feeling ashamed. " I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ..."

" It doesn't matter, Kaori. Akira visits me sometimes, it's the only thing that matters. I have friends with me, a sister that loves me, I don't want anything else."

She smiles at me, showing that she's not mad at me at all. But I still feel a bit ashamed, thinking that it was a dumb question to ask. However, we chat while drinking our tea, which is a pleasant moment. I lose track of time with them, enjoying every moment in their company.

" So, your class project is about food, right? I will remember to buy you something at the festival." I say with a smile.

" As you wish, but it's nothing fancy, you know." Lilly chortles. " This year, I'll try to enjoy the festival a bit."

I don't answer, but I foresee to do things with her and Hanako, maybe Saki too that day. I don't say anything to keep it a surprise. She deserves to have a good time with others, given how hard she works for her classmates.

That being said, I have to know what I can do for her that day. There's still time, but the sooner it is done, the better. While taking another cup of tea, I have the impression of being a part of a tea club. That idea isn't disturbing at all, I don't have any club for now.

I think that I become very attached to Lilly, and a bit to Hanako too. And I have to say that I like this idea. However, I don't know where does that leaves me. It would be a pleasant surprise, I don't expect anything.

[Razoredge]

Entrance

I wake up one hour and a half before the first lesson of the morning because I have to start swimming again. Fortunately, I didn't lose my habits too much, get a habit back is a pain in the ass. Outside, the sun has barely risen, everything is quiet while the vast majority of students is sleeping. After waking up, I take my swimming suit that I put under my school clothes, as usual. In my sports bag, I put my underwear to get changed later, and a towel. I'm ready, and I can leave my bedroom, putting my school stuff next to the door.

I wonder what I can eat for breakfast as I head towards the refectory. A soup would be nice because the weather is pretty cold today. A few eggs with vegetables would be perfect too. I can't swim with an empty stomach, and when I'm hungry like that, I can't cogitate without eating anything. I hurry up because I start shivering, and I don't want to come down with something.

Waiting in the line, I yawn because I'm still a bit tired, the night was too short. I have slept for only four hours, but I've done worse in the past. Usually, I don't have to wait for a long time, about less than ten minutes. When it's finally my turn, I take a miso soup, three eggs, and some greens with a cup of tea. In fact, when I try to change my habits, I'm still doing the same thing. I find an empty table, and I begin to eat quickly, as usual. I eat too fast, but I can't help myself. In ten minutes, my tray is empty, and I clear my table before I head for the pool.

Swimming will help me to digest my meal, half an hour would be enough, but I'll try to swim longer if I can. There are only two or three students in the water, it seems to be an all-girls party. That's not disturbing at all, even if a bit of diversity would have been great. I undress quickly, and I put my stuff in a corner.

On the diving board, I take a deep breath. The water surface looks like a mirror, and every time I see something like this, I always feel the need to dive. This is what I do, and underwater, everything is quiet, like a peaceful world. However, even if the water seems to be calm, danger lurks into darkness, especially in the ocean. In a swimming pool, the main threat is tiredness, you always have to be careful not pushing your limits. I did it because I was dumb, and I don't want to suffer the consequences.

Today, my warm-up will be longer than usual, a few more laps should be enough. I swim at a reasonable pace, I must not push myself too high. Maybe it's not a good idea, but I try to swim underwater as much as I can, in order to improve my stamina. After fifteen minutes of a proper warm-up, my real training begins. I swim a lot slower than usual because I need to retrieve my old habits. If I swim for half an hour today, it would be nice, I'm not asking for anything else.

Swimming doesn't tire me too much, but I have to be careful. I wonder which other sport I could do without training for a long time to get a reasonable level.

Each time I'm about to touch the pool's wall, I turn over underwater. When I was young, I wasn't able to do such a thing, but now, I do it every time. For the last lengths of the day, I swim a bit faster, but not too much.

That was a good training today, even if I could swim a bit longer. After getting out of the pool, the first thing I do is to sway my head back and forth. It allows me to get rid of the water on my hair before getting dry. In the lockers room, I get dressed, and I go back to my room to take my school stuff. Just before entering the classroom, I see our teacher head for the stairs quickly. I look at this whole scene with curious eyes, and I wonder what happens. Maybe my classmates could give me the answer I need to understand.

" What's wrong with the teacher?" I ask my neighbor. " He seemed to be in a hurry."

" He forgot that the new student comes today, and he has to greet him because he's our homeroom teacher." She answers me while doodling on a sheet of paper.

I gasp, everything makes sense now, and I totally forgot it was today too. A lot of questions pop in my head, and right now, I can't answer any of these, which is annoying. The only thing I know is that this student is a boy, that's all. Not very useful information, but this is the only thing I have in mind about him.

Some excitation takes hold in the entire classroom, with a lot of questioning. Nevertheless, we have to be patient, all the answers will come in a few minutes. A few minutes later, the teacher comes back into the classroom with the new student. At first sight, his disability isn't perceptible, such as a lot of students in this academy. After a little presentation from the teacher, everyone applauds, just like me. Then, the new boy begins to speak about himself.

" Well, hello everyone, I'm Hisao Nakai." He shivers while speaking in front of us. " I'm fond of reading and playing soccer, and I hope I will get along well with everyone here." Then, he turns silent.

Everyone applauds once again, and to allow him to include the class group, we'll have to work in groups. While everyone is moving, I get up, and I go towards the back of the classroom.

" Hi, Hanako, would you like to work with my neighbor and me? We would be happy to work with you, you know." I smile while asking her to work with us.

It takes her a while to answer because she seems to be too shy to do such a thing. However, with some patience, I manage to have an answer from her.

" Y... yes, why not? Thank you... Ka... Kaori" At least, she remembers my name, which is significant.

She didn't look me in the eyes, but this is not a problem, I can understand the fact that she's shy because of her disability. When everyone is ready, the teacher gives us the work to do. At first glance, this is not too hard, but it will take a bit of time to be done correctly.

The first questions are pretty easy, and in five minutes, we can answer five questions. The following items are way harder, and I need to turn things over in my head more. Also, I need to help my neighbors when they don't understand some words or concepts. I'm a wordsmith, not a scientist, but I can help them by explaining these words in my own way. At least, I try to do it simply, using comparisons. Hanako writes on another sheep of paper the meaning of the words she doesn't understand and that I try to explain to her correctly.

During the rest of the lesson, we answer the questions as much as we can, even if this work won't be graded. The other teachings of the morning won't be as fun as this one, unfortunately.

.................................

Waiting in the queue of the refectory, I wonder what I can for lunch. Notwithstanding, I can't cogitate anymore because of someone who poked my ribs. I jump with surprise, trying to find whose responsible. In front of me, there's a girl with red earrings, and it makes me smile.

" Saki, don't act like that, sweetheart. Do you really want to kill me with surprise?" I laugh, as I calm down my heart.

" At least, I have all your attention now, and I won't let you eat alone. I want to know everything about the new student." She answers with a candid smile.

" How do you know..." I'm surprised, it seems that news travels fast. "... Anyway, I don't have anything for you apart from his name and what he likes." I add, shrugging my shoulders.

Taking our meal, we search for an empty table to eat together. As we start to eat, Saki wants to know some things about him, which is logical, given that she's curious.

" Well, I told you that I don't know anything about him except his name, which is Hisao Nakai, and the fact he likes reading and playing soccer. That's all I have for you today, I can't satisfy your curiosity passion." I burst into laughter while she gives me a nudge.

" You should be curious too, Kaori, it's good for you. At least, it won't kill us, as far as I know." Saki laughs too, trying to eat a bit.

As usual, during the meal, we talk about insignificant stuff while eating. I have to say the food here is far way better than in my previous school. However, my mother's cooking is unbeatable, and sometimes, I really miss it. When I'm eating with Saki, I try to eat slower than usual, because it worries her. Instead of eating in ten minutes, it takes me twenty minutes to finish my dishes.

Spending time with Saki before returning in classes is a thing I'll cherish as long as I can. Outside, we walk around, talking about her class projects for the festival.

When we walk together, I always hold her hand in mine. I acted like that since she's my best friend, and I won't change my habits. It may be weird for some people, but it can help her when she feels a bit weak. That being said, I don't have to justify my behavior, especially when it's cute and helps my best friend.

The weather is beautiful, and a bit warm, which is enjoyable. Summer will be hot this year, I won't lie. Now that I'm with Saki, I don't want to work this afternoon, but nobody asks for my opinion. This said I know she thinks the same thing, in fact, we think about the same things sometimes. It's sad, but we have to split and go back to our respective classrooms. At least we can work on our class projects this afternoon.

...............................

After our lesson, it's time to work a bit. We have made some progress, but there's still a bit of work to do. With some girls, I work to paint new streamers, much more colorful than the previous ones. We have to make the guests want to buy food or little objects.

For me, the festival is the best time of the year at school, with holidays, of course. And this year, I could spend my time with some nice girls, I have nothing to complain about. On my streamer, I paint some sakura flowers, for a stand that sold products made with cherries. These flowers are one of the few things I can draw with a blindfold. My classmates remember this fact, and each year, when we have to sell cherry products, I paint the flowers. I really put my heart into this work, and without being conceited, I love the result.

In my previous school, we also had a festival, but the students were less involved than in this school. It seems that this festival is well-known in this region, so we have to do a lot of work every year, but the result's worth it. It takes two hours to do today's work, and we made a lot of progress. Maybe, this year, we'll be in advance, especially if we go on like this. I can't wait to spend my time with Lilly, Saki, and Hanako for the festival.

I already know that Saki won't take the same university curriculum as me, and we have to enjoy our last year together. Of course, I'll be visiting her as much as I can, but we'll see each other less. I prepare myself mentally for that, even if it's pretty hard.

Now, we have some free time, and for me, it's time to read. Sometimes, I feel like I'm a bookworm, but it's not disturbing at all. I prefer to read rather than watching TV or something like that. I can't live without a book in my bedroom, and I don't want to live without any book in my entire life.

[Mirage_GSM]

You know, you're the only person I've ever seen use the words "refectory" and "cogitate".

Anyway, try to watch your pacing a bit:
You don't have to feel obligated to tell us in detail about every time she goes swimming or about all of her lessons and lunches. For the last few chapters you have had plenty of such scenes, but nothing much actually happened to advance the story. The last half dozen chapters could have been shortened by at least half without losing anything.

[Razoredge]

In fact, I use these words a lot since the first day I've learned English, I really like these words, so, in my mind, it was obvious to use these.

That being said, thanks for the advice, I'll try, for the next chapters, to cut off these "insignificant" scenes to add more plot and more things to advance the story.

[Razoredge]

Musical stroll

After a dull day, working for our class project for the festival is a release. There're three days before the festival, and there's still some work to do to be ready. I help the boys nailing the last boards together outside, and then, we can start painting our stands with various colors. I must point out that Hanako helps me without any request, which is really appreciable. There's still a lot of work for me to win over her shyness, but she makes a lot of progress, I have to say. Maybe Lilly had something to do with it.

There's a lot of agitation outside. Every class works on their stands, even the first-years, which is a glorious mess. Some students talk about their projects for the festival's day or what they'll do when their parents will come to school. Speaking of parents, I still hope that my own parents would come this day, but I'm not sure of anything right now. Maybe they won't tell me anything to keep the surprise until the end. They had already done it, and I'm betting that Saki was behind this.

I try to work as fast as I can because I want to go to the city with Saki late in the day. I have enough pocket money to buy a fine acoustic guitar, and I think she would like to come with me. When the first stand is fully painted, we tackle the second one. Each stand has its own colors, according to what it sells. Food stands are painted in red or white, depending on the kind of food. Stands that sell cherry products are painted in pink, and so on and so forth.

When today's job is done, I slip away, looking for Saki. Luckily, one of her classmates notices that I am potentially looking for her, and he tells me where I can find her. She seems that she's still in her classroom, helping her classmates. I would expect nothing less from her, she's always kind and helpful with the other students.

I can't even enter her classroom, she instantly runs towards me when she sees me. Sometimes, we act like children towards each other, but it's another reason that explains why we're friends. I tell Saki what I want to do, and then we head for the dorm because I have to take my wallet.

Also, it's the perfect moment to give her some clothes that I don't wear anymore. It may be a bit big for her, but I know she likes to put my clothes on sometimes. I give her two black tee-shirts, one white tee-shirt, and a pajama. I really hate to throw out my old clothes, so I try as much as I can to give them to charity or to Saki if it sizes her well.

She runs towards her bedroom to put her new clothes on her wardrobe, and we leave the dorm. On our way to the city, she finally tells me some good news.

" Remember the boy I told you about? I said it didn't go anywhere, but things have changed. He came back to me, and I think I'll give him a shot." She cheers, and that's exactly what I wanted to hear from her in this regard.

" Finally, it's about fucking time, but he finally understood. Well, I hope that it's going to be ok."

" What about you, did you managed to say anything to Lilly?" She nudges me while laughing. And I have to say, I'm bursting out laughing too.

" I really like her, it's true, but I don't know how if it's love or anything else." She smiles while I'm trying to explain what my feelings are. " However, I would never say no to her, to be honest." I had, smiling a bit too.

" So, you like her more than what you try to say, it's fine, you know." She chuckles gently.

"Maybe, I can't even explain, the only time I felt something more than a plain and simple friendship, you became my best friend, remember."

As an answer, she takes my hand in hers, and she softly cuddles up against me. I'm pleased to be her best friend, and I try to enjoy each moment I spend with her, as much as I can.

On the road, she also talks about what she'll do for the upcoming holidays. She'll return to the fold, such as me, even for a week. Maybe we could spend our Christmas holiday together with my parents if her parents agree with it. Then, after a little trip, we reach the music store, and the first thing I do there is looking for the guitar I wanted to buy a while ago. Fortunately for me, it's still here, and its price is still the same. Without asking myself any questions, I buy this guitar with a bag and a little tuner, and we go back to school.

On our way, we meet a few students who are heading for the school too. A pretty common thing there that you can see every day.

......................................

After dinner, we go towards my bedroom, she seems to be keen to hear me playing. The first thing Saki does when she comes into my bedroom is jumping on my bed to lie down. I hate playing guitar on a chair, so I sit down on the floor.

However, I can't start tuning my guitar yet, because I need setting up the strings a bit. Each time I change my electric guitar's strings, I pull them horizontally to untighten them. This way, the strings are way less elastic, and the tuning holds longer. This is precisely what I do on this guitar before tuning it.

It takes me almost 5 minutes to tune my strings because I'm a bit maniac on this matter, I have to say. When it's done, I play an easy piece, just to check that everything is perfect. But the pièce de résistance comes shortly after when I'm playing and singing one of my own compositions.

This is a song that talks about a geisha who falls in love with a soldier during the war. Unfortunately for her, he dies during a battle on an island in the Pacific Ocean, and she suffers from depression before killing herself to join him in death. It seems that Saki likes it, given that she moves her head in rhythm. Also, when she looks at my fingers like that, it means that she's fascinated, which means a lot to me.

Initially, this song is a Black Metal song, only made to be played on an electric guitar. But I also did an acoustic version with clean singing, to be able to play it whenever I want without any amp. That being said, it's not the only song I want to play for her. Suddenly, it starts to rain outside, which is the perfect time for me to play a folk song about rain. I began to learn to play guitar with folk songs, especially kids' songs. Saki laughs as I'm singing with a weird voice, which is a habit for me when I'm playing kids' songs.

I really like the sound of this guitar, it's bright and clear, for a crazy low price. I play two other songs for her, one song about Japanese mythology and one song about a strong friendship, just like ours.

When I'm lying down on my bed, I'm cuddling up to her without a word. She's gently stroking my hair, which is one of the things I find the most relaxing. When it's raining outside, I'm glad to stay inside, especially under the covers.

" I hope you have nothing planned for the festival, I want to spend my day with you, and with Lilly and Hanako too." I yawn. " At least a part of the day, I don't want to impose my will on you," I add, yawning a bit more.

" I don't feel forced, you know, it'll be my pleasure. I'm just asking you to wait until the beginning of the afternoon, my classmates need my help." Saki answers as she begins to massage my hair.

" You'll see, one day, they'll start calling you mom." I joke while laughing.

" This will be the next logical step, you see me as a kind of sister, do you?" She expresses with a cute tone.

"That's right, but this is because you're more than a friend to me, and you know that." I approve, laughing a bit more. " However, I want to be informed about every little step with him."

" And I want to be informed too about everything you did with Lilly. And don't try to tell me that you don't understand which relation you have with her. " She pats my head as she's making fun of me a little bit, but not in a hard way.

Outside, the rain intensifies, as night fell quickly. I don't want her to leave my bedroom, this is really childish, but I like being with her. But all good things must come to an end, and before she leaves my bedroom, I hug frankly, kissing her on the forehead.

Before reading, it's time to take a shower and brushing my teeth. The bathroom is empty now, which is a bit unusual because usually, a lot of students are taking their shower at this hour. I throw myself in an empty shower, and when the hot water pours on my skin, I breathe a sigh of relief. I catch myself dozing a bit, a fact that some cold water wipes away. I didn't sleep well last night, and I think I won't read tonight. I brush y teeth and get back into my room. Putting my pajama, I throw myself under my covers.

I'm tired, so I'll prepare my school stuff tomorrow morning. The rain won't help me to sleep better, but I think that tiredness will end me. Surprisingly, I fall asleep quickly, even if the noise of the rain is loud. Luckily, it's not stormy outside, so I have nothing to fear.

The festival is fast approaching, and I can't wait for that day, as every year. But this year, I will finally spend my day in a girls' group, which is way better, even if I love to spend my time with Saki on our side.

[Mirage_GSM]

" What about you, did you managed to say anything to Lilly?" She nudges me while laughing. And I have to say, I'm bursting out laughing too.

" I really like her, it's true, but I don't know how if it's love or anything else."

Wait, What?
I know it's in the title of the story, but in the story itself your character has not even once said anything to Saki about having feelings of any kind for Lilly. She has not even thought about it! (I just went over the previous chapters just to make sure I didn't miss a chapter somewhere.)
I've been wondering for some time when the story would finally go in that direction, but this is completely out of the blue...

[Razoredge]

I forgot to tell something in my previous chapters, so it may sound paradoxal, I know that. In fact, Saki knows a lot of things, and Kaori too. So, sometimes, they don't need to talk to each other about things to already know these things. Though, Kaori lies to herself in their feelings, just like she lies to herself about the feelings she had for Saki before she became her bestfriend.
I don't try to justify myself, I forgot to write things clearly, so, I understand that it sounds weird or something like that.
(I remembered that I forgot things after I've posted the chapters, so, yeah, I'm guilty, and I hope everything will be better in the future)

So, for now, I have to tell that she lies to herself about her feelings, and don't know what to do about that.

[Mirage_GSM]

A basic example of how someone lies to themselves about their feelings:

I almost jump as someone slams shut the door. How long have I been staring in her eyes now? What have I been doing? Why? Could it be that I... Nah...

The strongest reaction your MC has had about Lilly so far:

She's really nice.

[Razoredge]

Shopping trip

The only exciting lesson of the day was Japanese history, as usual. We talked about the situation of Japan a few years after the war, in an objective manner. History must be seen with a neutral vision, even if it's difficult to talk about these things without taking side. The history of my country is one of the reasons why I want to become a history teacher. I like sharing my knowledge, especially with kids and my friends, so becoming a teacher is natural for me. But there're lots of obstacles to overcome before teaching things to kids.

Our class project for the festival is officially over, and now, we have some free time, which is perfect for me to do some shopping. I need to buy some food and snacks for weekends and evenings. Even if I eat well, sometimes, two or three hours after the last meal, I'm hungry.

It'll be a pleasant little stroll too, especially if Saki wants to join me. There's no reason that she tells me no, she's always ready to go somewhere with me. It rained yesterday, but today, it's sunny and hot.

I already know what I want to buy, some cherry and chocolate cakes, and some lemon candies. Maybe some other things, but nothing is decided for now. Luckily, the convenience store next to the academy sells a lot of cheap products.

Back to the dorm, I take my backpack and my wallet, and forecast to head for Saki's bedroom. However, when I knock on her door, nothing happens. It sounds weird because, at this hour, she should be in her room, or at least outside, but I haven't seen her today. So, my first mission for today is to find my best friend in the academy.

Outside the dorm, I ask a student if he sew Saki, but he answers negatively. His mate tells me that she has been looking for me for 15 minutes. Sometimes, I need to think like Saki does, in this way I should be able to find her in cases like that. It seems that she's in the main building, looking for me. It tooks me about 5 minutes to find her, on the ground floor, but thankfully, I found her in the hall, when I was about to get back outside. Seriously, we really have to establish a strategy to see each other sometimes.

" Finally, you're here, I've been looking for you for 20 minutes, you know." Saki chortles, sticking out her tongue.

" Such as me, we really have to establish a strategy, sweetheart. Looking for each other like that is a waste of time." I answer in a serious yet kind tone.

" So, what can we do about that? I mean, I can send you some messages, but I never think about it." Saki admits, looking at her feet a bit.

" Me neither, but that's logical because we spend all our time at school. Now, you're here, how about shopping with me?" I show my wallet. " I need to buy some food," I add, smiling at her.

In this way, we head for the convenience store next to the academy. I take her hand in mine to help her because she has trouble in the climbs or in downhills sometimes. I have to say, my heart hates climbs too, which is understandable, and I have to be careful about that.

" I think my parents won't come this year, mom didn't call me to announce their visit." I sigh, a bit sad.

" This time, I had nothing to do with it, I assure you." Saki is concerned about my sadness and tries with her actions to soothe me.

" I know, sweetie, but you know what it is, I miss them a lot. Luckily, you're there for me, and I won't thank you enough for being such a friend."

Saki is everything for me, apart from my parents, and I try everything I can to thank her every day for being there for me. I try to be a beacon for her when she's not fine, a shoulder to cry on when she needs to. One day, we'll be separated, however, we don't think about it. On our way to the store, we find Lilly, at least it must be her. Tall blond girls are not ordinary people there, so I can't get wrong. I don't want to come as some sort of surprise, so I call her, which makes her smile when she hears my voice.

" Oh, hello Kaori, I'm glad to see you." Lilly beams. " Are you heading towards the convenience store too?" She adds, with a radiant smile.

" Yes, I need to buy some food, and I thought that Saki would be happy to come with me."

As soon as I mentioned Saki, Lilly greets her too. On our way, we talk about insignificant stuffes, such as some of our lessons or the school's food. They confess to me that some lessons are pretty boring, like me with maths. Nevertheless, Saki strikes when I'm not expecting it, with her mischievous look.

" You know, I'm happy to see that Kaori has a new friend." Saki cheers. " I was afraid I was the only one who meets new people between us."

I blush while I try to say something, but not a single word comes from my mouth. I know that Saki tries to tell that I'm a good friend for her, but she's as clumsy as me, to be honest. But it seems to work, as Lilly laughs a bit with a cute tone.

" I'm sure she'll become a good friend for me, as she is for you. Maybe she'll become something else one day." Lilly giggles and Saki strikes again.

" That'll be the first time for her, you know. I'm sure she can become a good girlfriend. " Saki gives me a nudge while laughing.

" Oh, Saki, please..." I laugh a bit too, but I'm still blushing.

" Really? That's cute, I thought you had some chances before, you had nobody in your life before?" Lilly asks me with a cute concerned tone.

" Never... But it was a choice." I desperately try to justify myself, but it sounds like a lie, and it was obviously a lie.

I never had the chance to get someone in my life, Saki is like a sister for me, but I never felt love for her, such as her. I know that Lilly and Saki were joking, but... I don't know, it was cute, not mean. Lilly was really kind to me since I met her, but I don't know, it seems that she tries to be something more than a kind girl with me. Maybe my brain is playing tricks on me, perhaps I'm right, I don't know what to think right now. I should admit that Saki doesn't help me at all while joking like that.

" You also have the choice to fall in love with someone you're close to." Lilly smiles, and Saki approves what she said.

" Maybe one day, I'll think about this option, it could be great, I have to say." I hum, looking at my feet.

Now, I'm disturbed, I don't know what to think anymore. What Lilly said has obviously a double meaning, but I'm not sure what it really means. She's a good friend to me, it seems that she likes me a lot... But I don't know why, I'm pretty sure that she's thinking about something else.

At the convenience store, Saki does her shopping alone, and Lilly gently grabs my arm to stay with me. It must be because she needs help, but she didn't ask me anything. Everything she does today troubles me, and because of that, I ask myself a lot of questions. Why does she act like that? Does she want to tell me something in another way? How does she see me? I don't have any answers to my own questions. Maybe time will answer my questions, but for now, I'm stuck in my own questioning.

On the shelves, she asks if I can pick some items for her, like tea or some cookies. She's not looking for fancy stuff, just like me, so I do my shopping while helping her.

When I take cookies, I give her some other cookies, asking myself how she cans like a taste like that. But she could think the same thing about me, so I have nothing to say, everyone has its own taste after all. My mother loves sakura's flower taste cookies, and she hates dark chocolate with cherries when I love it.

Then, Lilly asks me if we can go to the vegetable section. Suddenly, a question pops out in my mind, and I want my answer.

" There's a lot of fresh products in your basket, do you cook everything at school?" I ask, a bit curious.

" Hum, yes. The academy's food is not my taste to make it simple. So I try cooking everything myself as much as I can." She hums, smiling at me. " Also, I cook a bit for Hanako, too, because she doesn't really like the refectory," Lilly adds, and it makes sense, given that Hanako seems pretty shy when she's alone.

" I should cook for myself too, but I'm only able to cook some ramen and an egg, I wouldn't get very far with that." I grin, laughing about my own clumsiness. It makes her laugh too, so that's a good thing.

" Maybe I'll teach you how to cook some meals too in the future. I'm not that good, but I'm doing it quite well if I may add." She pauses a bit before continuing to speak. " You owe me something in return, nothing is free, you know." She has a mischievous look that I found beautiful, I have to say.

" Whatever you want, I need to learn how to cook, so I'll figure something out to pay off my debts." She gently holds my arm as she smiles more.

" I have a great imagination, you know, be careful, I could take you up on that." Lilly chirps as we end our shopping and head towards the checkout.

" I'm fine with that, Saki acted like that with me before, and now we're best friends. So I'm not afraid about what you could ask me."

When I'm waiting for Lilly, I see that some people look at her with a weird look, as if she was an alien or something like that. Students like us are a common thing here, but not for everyone, apparently. Keep calm Kaori, they don't deserve that you get angry because of them. Saki notices it and takes my hand to calm me down, which works like a charm. I can always count on her, and that's a reason why I will never let her down. Luckily, we leave this place quickly, so I don't need to get mad at them.

On the way back to the academy, Lilly talks about the student council because it seems that the president is mad at her for some reason. She's quite vague about that, obviously because she doesn't want to expose the real reasons behind that. When I'm offering my help to her, Lilly gently rejects it, saying that she wants to fix this alone.

Students' stuff is not that easy to understand sometimes, and it's better not asking some questions. She has her personal problem, and, naturally, she wants to fix her problems alone, I usually act the same way after all.

But, somehow, I want to help her, because she acts with me precisely like Saki did in the past before she became my best friend. However, I can't impose things to her, even with the best of intentions. Maybe, in the future, she will be a close friend, and hopefully, she will open up, but I'm not a mind reader.

The only thing I understood today was that she acted differently with me than before. I don't even know why, maybe I should ask some questions. Nevertheless, I find that it's just wrong, my mind yells at me that asking these questions is bad. Perhaps I just have to wait to see how it'll go in the future.

[Mirage_GSM]

The grammar seems to be getting worse in this chapter, especially in the dialogues...
Which makes it a bit hard to tell what is supposed to be intentional innuendo and exactly what just accidentally sounds like it.
The overall effect is that Lilly does not coe across as very Lilly-like in this chapter.
I would love to point out specific examples, but it's more of an overall impression...