Hanako's Broken Heart Club

[pandaphil]

I hope getting all that down in print helped you feel a bit better Parliament. *Bro hugs* Welcome to the board!

[YZQ]

I identified with Hanako being bullied, although mine was a very minor one compared to hers. I tried to think "What if she decided that people are bastards?" due to the bullying, and stood up for herself/lashed out earlier... It was not pretty.

[Parliament]

thank you pandaphil, now it is time to end the wallowing and begin the fixing =)

theres a thousand stories like mine may as well make it one of the good ones.

[Torric]

Torric, what is fate?

In reality we can see that causes have consequences. But there are also uncaused events, like radioactive decay. The web of causality and reality is so intricate that it is very hard if not impossible for any human to know what the future will be like. So even if the future were set in stone, it does appear to us as if it is not so. I want to live as if my choices matter, even if it may not always be so. I don't see much point in trowing up our hands and giving in to fatalism.

So, basically action/reaction? You don't believe that some people are pre-destined to be miserable and alone?

[YZQ]

Torric, what is fate?

In reality we can see that causes have consequences. But there are also uncaused events, like radioactive decay. The web of causality and reality is so intricate that it is very hard if not impossible for any human to know what the future will be like. So even if the future were set in stone, it does appear to us as if it is not so. I want to live as if my choices matter, even if it may not always be so. I don't see much point in trowing up our hands and giving in to fatalism.

So, basically action/reaction? You don't believe that some people are pre-destined to be miserable and alone?

"Tendency to", yes. "Pre-destined", no. I think Dr. Viktor Frankl puts it best in his masterpiece, Man's Search for Meaning. For that matter, many of his quotes.

[Walrusfella]

Pleasure to meet you Parliament, and thanks for posting your story. For a roundhead you seem like a decent sort.
 
Don't worry at all about how subjectively difficult your circumstances were in comparison to anyone else here. I had the same worries when I first posted what was bothering me, but I was set straight. There isn't anyone here who's suffering is more "legitimate" than yours.
 
It was a long time ago for me, but I remember that slow, sickening feeling when you realise that some of the people you call friends aren't hanging out with you because they like you or want your company. You certainly don't need people like that, and it's good that you're well shot of them. Your friendship is valuable, and should only be shared with people who deserve it.
 
As for girls, there are plenty out there that are constant and true, and I have faith that you'll find one. It will be up to you to be the same for her.
 

[Kutagh]

Pleasure to meet you Parliament, and thanks for posting your story. For a roundhead you seem like a decent sort.
 
Don't worry at all about how subjectively difficult your circumstances were in comparison to anyone else here. I had the same worries when I first posted what was bothering me, but I was set straight. There isn't anyone here who's suffering is more "legitimate" than yours.
 
It was a long time ago for me, but I remember that slow, sickening feeling when you realise that some of the people you call friends aren't hanging out with you because they like you or want your company. You certainly don't need people like that, and it's good that you're well shot of them. Your friendship is valuable, and should only be shared with people who deserve it.
 
As for girls, there are plenty out there that are constant and true, and I have faith that you'll find one. It will be up to you to be the same for her.
 

It has never been stated that there was a requirement on how badly you must be suffering. The only implicit requirement is honesty, since if you can't honestly tell us how you're suffering then you're not honest towards yourself either about the suffering (This doesn't mean you need to tell us everything though, but as much detail as is relevant and appropriate is very welcome).

And I strongly agree that you're better off without people acting like your friends. I've encountered them too and since halfway through high school I kept myself to a core group of two real friends (which has since then expanded though). Real friends last longer despite seeing you not so often

[Parliament]

Tyvm both of you, I had never really told anyone about how those events made me feel before. Just thought about it alone, to myself. In retrospect that isn't really a healthy way to cope. Neither is anonymous forums but it'll have to do for now lol
Even though you don't know me in real life getting it all down in once place that isn't my head has been very refreshing.

@Walrus I actually am not much of a parliamentarian, I was just listening to this when I made my account =)

@Kutagh If honesty is the only requirement then I fit the bill, I've got that in spades. Maybe not everything in my story is relevant or necessarily appropriate, but I needed to get it out somewhere and now I did =)

[YZQ]

Tyvm both of you, I had never really told anyone about how those events made me feel before. Just thought about it alone, to myself. In retrospect that isn't really a healthy way to cope. Neither is anonymous forums but it'll have to do for now lol
Even though you don't know me in real life getting it all down in once place that isn't my head has been very refreshing.

@Walrus I actually am not much of a parliamentarian, I was just listening to this when I made my account =)

@Kutagh If honesty is the only requirement then I fit the bill, I've got that in spades. Maybe not everything in my story is relevant or necessarily appropriate, but I needed to get it out somewhere and now I did =)

Telling someone about your situation is almost always the first time to recovery, as you acknowledge that there are issues that need airing.

[Kitsune Spirit]

So I just had this thought again:

I often wonder why no one ever bothers to respond to anything I ever write (on other sites, FB namely, and sometimes DA). Am I really that boring, or am I just such a non-entity that they can't even remember that I exist long enough to see what I have to say? It doesn't bother me often enough that I get depressed, but sometimes I notice it, and it makes me feel like a nobody. I really feel alone then as stupid as that may sound. Other "friends" on my accounts - some of whom I actually consider friends and not just "people I know" even if they are internet-friends - have multiple people responding to things they post, while I might only have one comment, if that.

This happens offline to, I get treated like an afterthought, like I'll be in a group of people and the usual automatic "hi how are you" gets passed around and I will get ignored, or they will notice me and this "I guess I should say something to this person too" look briefly comes across their face before they ask me.

I'd make an excellent spy since I seem to be so forgettable...

[Exbando]

So I just had this thought again:

I often wonder why no one ever bothers to respond to anything I ever write (on other sites, FB namely, and sometimes DA). Am I really that boring, or am I just such a non-entity that they can't even remember that I exist long enough to see what I have to say? It doesn't bother me often enough that I get depressed, but sometimes I notice it, and it makes me feel like a nobody. I really feel alone then as stupid as that may sound. Other "friends" on my accounts - some of whom I actually consider friends and not just "people I know" even if they are internet-friends - have multiple people responding to things they post, while I might only have one comment, if that.

This happens offline to, I get treated like an afterthought, like I'll be in a group of people and the usual automatic "hi how are you" gets passed around and I will get ignored, or they will notice me and this "I guess I should say something to this person too" look briefly comes across their face before they ask me.

I'd make an excellent spy since I seem to be so forgettable...

It happens to me as well. My FB posts almost never have any comments. For me, though, people notice me offline if I'm at work, because I'm the guy that's stocking the shelves, therefore I know where everything is and how all of the beer tastes.

On another note: You're in Michigan too?

[Pyramid Head]

I've noticed we've got a few new members. Welcome to Hanako's Broken Heart Club. Do not let my presence alarm you, regardless of what the shit movies and American spin-offs might suggest i do not attack unprovoked.

[Torric]

So I just had this thought again:

I often wonder why no one ever bothers to respond to anything I ever write (on other sites, FB namely, and sometimes DA). Am I really that boring, or am I just such a non-entity that they can't even remember that I exist long enough to see what I have to say? It doesn't bother me often enough that I get depressed, but sometimes I notice it, and it makes me feel like a nobody. I really feel alone then as stupid as that may sound. Other "friends" on my accounts - some of whom I actually consider friends and not just "people I know" even if they are internet-friends - have multiple people responding to things they post, while I might only have one comment, if that.

This happens offline to, I get treated like an afterthought, like I'll be in a group of people and the usual automatic "hi how are you" gets passed around and I will get ignored, or they will notice me and this "I guess I should say something to this person too" look briefly comes across their face before they ask me.

I'd make an excellent spy since I seem to be so forgettable...

I know that feeling. I'd probably reply to some of your posts if I actually had drive to stay on a site for longer than maybe a couple minutes until I decide "Why bother?" and log off. I mean - hell - I only use FB just to play a couple games (which only takes about 10 minutes to do what I need to do then stop). My news feed is mainly filled with my friends and "friends" with updated statuses on how they're having an awesome time, and I'm stuck at home wallowing in my self-loathing and misery. I'm even borderline debating on just cancelling my FB because of it.

[Kitsune Spirit]

I only have facebook because of the few friends that I actually consider friends, and they live too far away for me to call them or text them. If it wasn't for them I would logoff and leave.

[Torric]

I only have facebook because of the few friends that I actually consider friends, and they live too far away for me to call them or text them. If it wasn't for them I would logoff and leave.

Tell me about it. All the friends I do have on there aren't that close to me anymore, and now it just seems more of a hindrance than anything.