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Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2012 4:05 pm
by Torric
Beoran wrote:Hi Torric, welcome, and thank you for your story.

ah, clumsy teenage sex that went wrong, or in this case, went nowhere. I may be wrong, but from hat you say, it seems that you were both just going to "hop into" having sex with each other without having done anything else before that. Just "hopping into sex" only works if the two partners know each other well and/or and already have had a lot of sex. It won't work out well for virgins. You gotta take your time to build it up over the course of several days, weeks or even months. First some dating, romancing, roses, a dance, singing, and perhaps then then and indirect kiss as you share food and drinks, then a direct kiss when the mood feels right, then holding hands, deep kisses, hugging, fondling, rubbing, petting, .... there are so much possibilities for exciting sexy things you can do to build up the tension. Only when you're both red hot and ready, you should go for it. And seriously don't forget to wear your rubber jacket in the rain.

Don't let what happened then scare you or hold you back now. Look for a lady you love and who loves you, and be honest to her about your worries. If she's the right one for you she will listen and help you, and as long as you take it easy and don't try to jump at it it will work out just fine.

Or if no such a person is on the horizon, then that look for an older, experienced lady who is willing to teach you the ropes. Like that you can get some practice and then get ready to look for the love of your life with confidence. Break the chains of the past that bind you!
I understand what you're saying, but it wasn't so much as the lack of experience (on her part, anyways) or the tension, but rather the excitement that made me have my... episode (for lack of better words). That's something that I hope I don't have to go through again, despite having gone through that ordeal before, but a first in this particular situation.
As for just "looking for another lady", unfortunately its not that easy. I have this obnoxiously bad habit of shying away from someone I find even remotely interesting, and usually need a friend as an ice breaker.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2012 7:49 am
by lvrr325
I didn't know who my best friend was... It was someone I knew, but we had a lot of fights over just plain stupid things. We started to get along better and both grew up a lot, but then she moved away. About the time I finally realized she was in fact my best friend was and accepted it and let go of my last trust issues, her remaining kidney decided to just about stop working and after years of medical stuff she's not going to do dialysis.

So a while back, I drove 800 miles one way in a 21 year old car just to see her one more time for a few days; I'm not sure I'll be able to see her again before the kidney quits completely and takes her with it.

On a goofy note, I found KS and started playing it and at some point told her about it - the first time through I went the Emi route to the good ending, not planned, just picking the best choices. It turned out she'd lost her legs in about the same place and hadn't told me yet. Nevermind that she's always been in a wheelchair, she was worried what I might think. So when I told her about KS, she thought I was, no pun intended, pulling her leg and already knew or something. Once I showed it to her, we had a good laugh about it.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2012 1:38 pm
by Beoran
Torric wrote: I understand what you're saying, but it wasn't so much as the lack of experience (on her part, anyways) or the tension, but rather the excitement that made me have my... episode (for lack of better words). That's something that I hope I don't have to go through again, despite having gone through that ordeal before, but a first in this particular situation.
As for just "looking for another lady", unfortunately its not that easy. I have this obnoxiously bad habit of shying away from someone I find even remotely interesting, and usually need a friend as an ice breaker.

Hmm so I misjudged what happened then... did you get too excited and explode before you could even get started? If you love each other then she should be understanding. Don't doubt yourself. Also You're older and wiser now. As for your shying away, that's certainly a habit to break. The next time you find someone remotely interesting, force yourself to go atat it. You may fail, but you will learn. And again and again until you get the hang of it... thing can only change if you actually do something.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2012 11:19 pm
by Torric
Beoran wrote:Hmm so I misjudged what happened then... did you get too excited and explode before you could even get started?
Lol! No, nothing like that, I assure you.
If you love each other then she should be understanding. Don't doubt yourself. Also You're older and wiser now. As for your shying away, that's certainly a habit to break. The next time you find someone remotely interesting, force yourself to go at it. You may fail, but you will learn. And again and again until you get the hang of it... thing can only change if you actually do something.
It's not that I don't want to find somebody, it's that it just keeps getting harder to muster up that much courage to force myself to even talk to someone. I'm 29 now, and it seems to be more of a "Why bother?" more than anything.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2012 5:19 pm
by Beoran
I was 29 when I met my wife. It's never too late for love! Get out of the fake comfort of living alone. Only very few people can live without love. Most of us and I think you too need love to give and to receive much more than we know! :)

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2012 6:27 pm
by Xanatos
Beoran wrote:I was 29 when I met my wife. It's never too late for love! Get out of the fake comfort of living alone. Only very few people can live without love. Most of us and I think you too need love to give and to receive much more than we know! :)
And how old are you now? Meeting is the easy part. Maintenance is where life becomes a pain. :lol:

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Thu Dec 27, 2012 9:06 am
by Beoran
Oh, I'm in my middle thirties. Yes, maintenace can be hard, but I think it's worthwhile! :)

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2012 12:17 am
by Yoh_Komori
First time poster to the main HBHC, long time lurker though.

I met someone I could say I "love" for the first time when I was 5, I didn't know it then but this girl and I would see more of each other in years to come. She was nice enough then, and shared juice with me at lunch. I didn't think anything more of that girl until much later though.

I grew up went to school and did as most kids do, made friends and hated homework. :P about grade 6 we were pushed to pick up an instrument, I decided on the tuba as it seemed easy enough to play. and there I met what can only be described as a shy, closet okatu with a seriously kind heart and a obsession with inyusha. she played baratone and we had to learn similar parts. Her Name was Nicole, and she and I realized we like a lot of the same music and anime. We became good friends and "band geeks" till in grade 8 when I realized I just could not keep up practice with the tuba. We parted ways and said our goodbyes, as she would be moving away for a year or more, but not before we kissed after the recital at the end of the year. She looked lovely in that turquoise dress and ribbon hair do she was "forced" to sport( in retrospect, she looked like a loli had under gone a time-skip to legal age :P). Her braces bit me, but In didn't care, we were happy to have had such good times and happy both of us shared these feelings.

Grade 9 passed by like a frigging slug and grade ten started no different, until I seen it. The bubble gum pink hair, the jack skellington-hello kitty sweater, those hazel eyes and that smile. Nicole had changed, she was still as tall as she was in band those almost 3 years ago, but wow....the titty fairy came to her house twice in 1 night @.@. she had to be no taller than 5'4" but had at least 35-40 D cup, and her looks had undergone a real punk rock do over. she was no longer a closet okatu, she wore it on her shoulder (literally) the over-done make up, the puppy dog eyes, the metal bands and the "school girl uniform" teeshirt. It was goofy, geeky and such a damn turn on all at once. We became fast friends once again. We even started work on my comic. Her artistic skill had blossomed since I knew her last, and her passion for drawing in the eastern styles had only improved her skill further.
We eventually dated, and on one eventful day her mom decided to do what a girl like her would only consider treason, and bring forth the baby pictures. she was embarrassed, and I tried to console her while faining interest and then we seen a picture of that happy little girl shairing juice with a boy who's had looked too big for his body. "god, mom don't show him that I look like I'm retarded" she said, but I could only blurt out "wait" as she turned the page. She froze, "what are you a peedo or something, it's just me in preschool, what's so special about it." It was special to me, I turned back the page and asked about the boy. "I don't remember much but I always used to-" I cut her off "-share his juice box every day." with a smile. Her eyes went wide, I could only smile as my eyes grew wider. she had a look that was 1 part deer in the headlight, 1 part amnesia patient realizing her lost memories, and 1 part of the girl from king kong as she was grabbed and carried up the empire state building. "how do you know that, you can't possibly know that...." both her and her mom said, "..unless I was that kid, right" I said quietly, now realizing how embarrassed I felt to be known as that kid.
When she started to cry I felt like I should never had even shared my juice back all those year ago, let alone speak of it today, but then she hugged me crying "you mean you were that kid. the only one who was nice to me in kindergarten?" I replied, only hugging her back and nodding. "you kept Nikki going" her mom said now quietly closing the book, "she was bullied all through school, but she kept remembering that nice kid and her friend from band, those 2 kids kept my girl going through the bad time's in her life" "Mom, he IS my friend from band, don't you get it! there one in the same!" she said through teary eyes, make-up running and all. she hadn't told her mom about us as friends in band, at least never mentioned my name or introduced me to her mom. now it was her moms turn for that doe-eyed look. It had dawned on her that for years her daughter had kept having a crappy life, but kept being befriended, and "saved" by the same caring boy. she quietly muttered "thank-you" and left us. Nicole cried on my shoulder for what felt like eons, then brushed off the tears and said blushing "I probably don't seem anything like the girl you thought I was before I became a bawling mess today. you probably don't want to date-" I cut her off. "-don't say that. You are every bit the girl I've known this year, known 2 years back for 2 years and known when that picture was taken. why would the knowing make me not like you?" we kissed and hugged and she smiled that million watt smile of hers. Knowing for better, or worse, we had found, forged, and realized we had never lost our friends through all the years.

As the school year went on, we remained as close as ever, drawing for each other, sharing music, and doing all that teen angst stuff together that 2 closet okatus would love to do. when grade 11 ended though, she was finish her schooling. She was after all, a year ahead of me in school, despite being in the same class all those years before. We parted ways on nothing but a smile and a wave. We're both bad at goodbyes and cry when we lose friends like that, so it ended as best it could.

We never said to each other once that we loved each other. even to this day, the best we can muster is "hello" and a catch-up conversation over coffee, or ideas for m comic she is still faithfully drawing for when ever she manages to find time. We've moved on, and found other people who we care for deeply and commit to, but both of us, every time our eyes meet, see all the feelings we had for each other still there. I found a someone I could say I "Loved" at age 5, and in spite of 17 years of change occurring, it seems all I can do is just take heart in knowing I found it, we found it, together.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2012 1:57 am
by SemisoftCheese
Yoh_Komori wrote:First time poster to the main HBHC, long time lurker though.

We never said to each other once that we loved each other. even to this day, the best we can muster is "hello" and a catch-up conversation over coffee, or ideas for m comic she is still faithfully drawing for when ever she manages to find time. We've moved on, and found other people who we care for deeply and commit to, but both of us, every time our eyes meet, see all the feelings we had for each other still there. I found a someone I could say I "Loved" at age 5, and in spite of 17 years of change occurring, it seems all I can do is just take heart in knowing I found it, we found it, together.
Dude this story broke my heart. I'd say to you to go and find your girl and make it work.

If you love her and she loves you, what's there to miss? I know there's obstacles left and right, money, time, travel, current relationships, etc.

But if I had to die tomorrow, I would have liked to know I would have died trying. That's what love is. And if you really, truly feel that way about her, there's no other option but to go fot it.

So send her a message, meet up for coffee, ask her what's up. Best of luck dude.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2012 10:24 am
by Yoh_Komori
SemisoftCheese wrote:
Yoh_Komori wrote:First time poster to the main HBHC, long time lurker though.

We never said to each other once that we loved each other. even to this day, the best we can muster is "hello" and a catch-up conversation over coffee, or ideas for m comic she is still faithfully drawing for when ever she manages to find time. We've moved on, and found other people who we care for deeply and commit to, but both of us, every time our eyes meet, see all the feelings we had for each other still there. I found a someone I could say I "Loved" at age 5, and in spite of 17 years of change occurring, it seems all I can do is just take heart in knowing I found it, we found it, together.
Dude this story broke my heart. I'd say to you to go and find your girl and make it work.

If you love her and she loves you, what's there to miss? I know there's obstacles left and right, money, time, travel, current relationships, etc.

But if I had to die tomorrow, I would have liked to know I would have died trying. That's what love is. And if you really, truly feel that way about her, there's no other option but to go fot it.

So send her a message, meet up for coffee, ask her what's up. Best of luck dude.
I couldn't even if I tried. she's with someone(as am I), were in different timezones, different cities, different states in life, and to top it all off she's having success in life, and I am really not currently. I care for her too much to drag her down by trying to uproot her from her life just to have her more in mine. I have someone I love now. It may not be this person I am talking about, but I did say I found someone I loved then, I didn't say I haven't found one now. So take heart knowing that sad story may not have a happy ending , but my "story" in general does. ;)

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2012 12:21 am
by SemisoftCheese
I guess this place is as good to spill my story as any.

I met her over this past summer. It was a classic--I was on a cruise of the mediterranean with my family, and while my parents spent the nights attending shows on the ship, I was free to roam around with my cousins.

I met her by chance at a ping pong table. She was playing with my cousin, who isn't good at ping pong, and I asked to cut in and play, because she looked half decent at the game. We finished the game and then we just sat and I realized what I was sitting next to.

Her name was Nina, from Russia, and she was everything I ever wanted in a girl. She was a 10/10 for looks (I mean it--long red hair, tall, skinny, facial features of a goddess), classy, elegant, spoke english in a terribly attractive accent, and enjoyed art. She was always drawing--a stray lick of hair would fall into her eyes and she would bat it away, in her own world of pencils and ink. A renaissance girl with a modern kick.

I spent 10 nights chasing after her. One night, she and I were alone and just spoke and played cards until 2 AM. Just two spirits wasting time.

But she always shied away. She carried around this dog embroidered purse, and inside of it were pictures of the suicide of a metalhead--Per Ohlin. Not like sewn in or anything--just folded computer printouts. And with it were normal things--cosmetics, lipstick, anything a girl would carry. She was normal in every single way, except for that. She loved card games, and would play until the end of the sun. Or chess-every Russian plays chess, and she wasn't half bad.

And she was ok with personal questions, like who her teachers were or who her friends were, but was gun-shy about anything serious. She would back away from questions about the future, or the past, or anything that could possibly bring up something rocky. Almost like an Emi. I can't really ascertain if she was an orphan, or adopted, but she certainly wasn't hurting for money.

So 10 days passed, arguably the best 10 days of my life. I saw her every evening--some days she dressed up in the latest fashions (Gucci was a favorite), and I felt like a million dollars with her on my arm, dressed in evening finery with the prettiest girl in the world.

But 10 days passed, and I had to return to life in New York. So I flew back over, and as I watched the sun filter over my window, crossing the atlantic, wondering where the time had went. She lived in Moscow, and I lived in New York. A relationship was out of the question.

So we talk every now and then, about innocent stuff like the Russian language or the latest news. She's living her life over there, and as I see it, there's no way for me to go over there or for her to come over here. Maybe someday she'll come over, but it'll be a friends thing.

I'm young. There are many fish in the sea. But I'll never forget my ten days in the deep blue sea of the Mediterranean, staring at the waves break on the dark Italian coast.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2012 11:37 pm
by Yoh_Komori
SemisoftCheese wrote:I guess this place is as good to spill my story as any.

I met her over this past summer. It was a classic--I was on a cruise of the mediterranean with my family, and while my parents spent the nights attending shows on the ship, I was free to roam around with my cousins.

I met her by chance at a ping pong table. She was playing with my cousin, who isn't good at ping pong, and I asked to cut in and play, because she looked half decent at the game. We finished the game and then we just sat and I realized what I was sitting next to.

Her name was Nina, from Russia, and she was everything I ever wanted in a girl. She was a 10/10 for looks (I mean it--long red hair, tall, skinny, facial features of a goddess), classy, elegant, spoke english in a terribly attractive accent, and enjoyed art. She was always drawing--a stray lick of hair would fall into her eyes and she would bat it away, in her own world of pencils and ink. A renaissance girl with a modern kick.

I spent 10 nights chasing after her. One night, she and I were alone and just spoke and played cards until 2 AM. Just two spirits wasting time.

But she always shied away. She carried around this dog embroidered purse, and inside of it were pictures of the suicide of a metalhead--Per Ohlin. Not like sewn in or anything--just folded computer printouts. And with it were normal things--cosmetics, lipstick, anything a girl would carry. She was normal in every single way, except for that. She loved card games, and would play until the end of the sun. Or chess-every Russian plays chess, and she wasn't half bad.

And she was ok with personal questions, like who her teachers were or who her friends were, but was gun-shy about anything serious. She would back away from questions about the future, or the past, or anything that could possibly bring up something rocky. Almost like an Emi. I can't really ascertain if she was an orphan, or adopted, but she certainly wasn't hurting for money.

So 10 days passed, arguably the best 10 days of my life. I saw her every evening--some days she dressed up in the latest fashions (Gucci was a favorite), and I felt like a million dollars with her on my arm, dressed in evening finery with the prettiest girl in the world.

But 10 days passed, and I had to return to life in New York. So I flew back over, and as I watched the sun filter over my window, crossing the atlantic, wondering where the time had went. She lived in Moscow, and I lived in New York. A relationship was out of the question.

So we talk every now and then, about innocent stuff like the Russian language or the latest news. She's living her life over there, and as I see it, there's no way for me to go over there or for her to come over here. Maybe someday she'll come over, but it'll be a friends thing.

I'm young. There are many fish in the sea. But I'll never forget my ten days in the deep blue sea of the Mediterranean, staring at the waves break on the dark Italian coast.
And you say I should go run to my love, eh gads man go find this person if you have such a connection. You hit it off and connected, right? I'm the worst person to be telling a person who loves someone what to do to attain it (given my last posts here) but at least I know if I really wanted to I COULD go find my love and confess to her I do indeed love her. you said it yourself, there are obstacles, but you shouldn't let distance be a factor in determining love...at least not the sole factor.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2012 3:28 pm
by Xanatos
Yoh_Komori wrote:go find this person if you have such a connection.
Unfathomable as it might seem, impromptu trips from New York to Russia aren't exactly feasible for 99% of the population of this planet.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2012 7:07 pm
by Yoh_Komori
Xanatos wrote:
Yoh_Komori wrote:go find this person if you have such a connection.
Unfathomable as it might seem, impromptu trips from New York to Russia aren't exactly feasible for 99% of the population of this planet.
very droll, Of course I am aware of that.

Re: Hanako's Broken Heart Club

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2012 7:10 pm
by Steinherz
Yoh_Komori wrote:
Xanatos wrote:
Yoh_Komori wrote:go find this person if you have such a connection.
Unfathomable as it might seem, impromptu trips from New York to Russia aren't exactly feasible for 99% of the population of this planet.
very droll, Of course I am aware of that.
Stuff like that makes you wish you had a teleporter huh?
(my friend had a problem like that as well, but he's in Canada)