Katawa Shoujo Forums

Reese8 wrote:This thread got quiet rather suddenly.

I never thought of thread as being particularly noisy. Yarn, on the other hand, will keep you up half the night chattering about the smallest of details.

...

Okay, now that I've satisfed my urge to Rin-ifcate, I would like to say that I've enjoyed the read so far.

I don't really know what to say exept that I liked the last chapters, and the revision for the last one.
Now let me go back for another thousand years slumber

I can't wait to see how a conversation between Iwanako, and Rin, goes.

TheCatBeyondSpace! wrote:I can't wait to see how a conversation between Iwanako, and Rin, goes.

I am dreading writing that. It will happen; soonish, even, and it will be more than just a one-time thing, but I'm pretty sure Rin fans won't think I'm giving her enough credit.

I also looking forward to her first meeting with Lilly. Something tells me they will get along quite well.

Mirage_GSM wrote:I didn't have any problems with the previous version, but if you ask me, this is better.

Aw shucks. Now I feel like one nitpicky bastard. Me and my editorial, perfectionist tendencies.

That's the last time I reply without getting any sleep first.

AntonSlavik020 wrote:I also looking forward to her first meeting with Lilly. Something tells me they will get along quite well.

TheCatBeyondSpace! wrote:I can't wait to see how a conversation between Iwanako, and Rin, goes.

I think I've speculated on these two somewhere on my long-winded babblings a few pages back. Something about the problem being in Iwanako's bra? Which, in a way, it is. But still.

Leaty wrote: I am dreading writing that. It will happen; soonish, even, and it will be more than just a one-time thing, but I'm pretty sure Rin fans won't think I'm giving her enough credit.

If it's of any consolation, this sentence reads fairly Rin-ish already. Or at least, it reminds me of when Rin procrastinates over the mural. Getting into character so soon, are we?

Bad Apple wrote:

Miracle_GSM wrote:...

Aw shucks. Now I feel like one nitpicky bastard. Me and my editorial, perfectionist tendencies.

Miracle?

Well this is honestly one of the greatest concepts i've come across. There is something similar I've found called Katawa Otome, what do you think http://ks.renai.us/viewtopic.php?f=52&t=5819

(deadfic)

EDIT: sorry

I'm an idiot.

Leaty wrote: So, my question is: how important is the shock of the first chapter to a reader's enjoyment of the fic? As the writer, I don't personally know this. When I wrote it a year ago, it was just a proof-of-concept, so the stinger was fairly important, but now this is becoming a full-fledged fic, and I'm wondering if maybe I should stop fooling myself. Should I be more open about the fact that this is a story about Iwanako having Hisao's condition?

Err, it's still important to first-timers I guess, I think keeping the shock / twist is still the best.

For those who already know, they should try to hint and say "Plot Twist", but when people ask "come on, what plot twist man? Tell me,", and they can like "yeah okay, it's about someone else in Hisao's shoes."

And if they keep going like "who?", then maybe hint that it's Iwanako? ..I guess?

In the end it doesn't matter, revealing the twist versus not revealing it both have their good points and bad, and each individual case should be judged accordingly.

As long as the story is good, it shouldn't matter much. The whole story doesn't rest on a single plot twist.

If you want, i will put the remark in a spolier

I don't want anything done right yet. I want to hear what people think.

As you wish

Leaty wrote:So, my question is: how important is the shock of the first chapter to a reader's enjoyment of the fic? As the writer, I don't personally know this. When I wrote it a year ago, it was just a proof-of-concept, so the stinger was fairly important, but now this is becoming a full-fledged fic, and I'm wondering if maybe I should stop fooling myself. Should I be more open about the fact that this is a story about Iwanako having Hisao's condition?

…I never suspected that it was meant to be a shock, sorry; I thought that it was a device to make people think about the story and thus be slightly drawn in before even reading it. I mean, the wording of the description is a bit vague, which always makes one suspicious, and the title is Divergence; by themselves, the title could maybe imply just a non-game route and the description that the story was written from the other party's perspective, but the association of the title with the description lead me to immediately assume "Oh, neat, a fic where Iwanako was the one with the heart condition". Opening the story was just confirmation and the nice discovery that the interesting concept was paired with good execution (something that is sadly not universal, and I always hate finding out that a fascinating idea was wasted more than discovering that the author of "Uthornamealay the 17-year-old war hero/firefighter/pro gamer goes to Yamaku and gets all the girls" has never heard of commas).

Leaty wrote:I don't want anything done right yet. I want to hear what people think.

For me, the shock comes when you see how differently the problem effects Iwanako versus Hisao. Going into the story, you realize what's happening after the first few paragraphs, so having that particular detail in the description doesn't take much away--at least I don't think it does, anyway.

"Uthornamealay the 17-year-old war hero/firefighter/pro gamer goes to Yamaku and gets all the girls"

Ah, the penultimate iteration of wish-fulfillment fan fiction, complete with an unflappable social genius possessing a 4.0 GPA, who won the Olympics twice in a row and got sent to Yamaku because of a stubbed toe, as interpreted by a literary-inept teenage underachiever with delusions of grandeur--we should all strive to write such amazingly predictable, completely meaningless drivel.