Katawa Shoujo Forums

This guy is awesome. I'm going to post in this thread just so that I'll look completely humble in comparison.

Weeeell fuck. There goes that idea xD
I was gonna use Lilly though, not Emi.

Maaaaybe I'll still do it. XD

Riakai wrote:Weeeell fuck. There goes that idea xD
I was gonna use Lilly though, not Emi.

Maaaaybe I'll still do it. XD

I'd shay you should. Using Lilly would provide a different enough of a perspective where it would still be interesting. You're call though.

English really needs something similar to a Temherte Slaqî.

AntonSlavik020 wrote:

Riakai wrote:Weeeell fuck. There goes that idea xD
I was gonna use Lilly though, not Emi.

Maaaaybe I'll still do it. XD

I'd shay you should. Using Lilly would provide a different enough of a perspective where it would still be interesting. You're call though.

Yeah. I'll have to re-read Alice in Wonderland, which is still a fresh read. Been at least a year since I last read it.

Neverbloom wrote:
I'm off now; off to write deeper, darker things. Don't expect diligent replies to your comments as I may never come back

How delightfully pleasant, spoken like a true gentleman.

Might want to show a little respect to your audience, it's like saying "I don't give a crap what any of you think " It's not just this line that really highlights a lack of care and respect for the very people whom you are trying to target.

Pretty silly don't you think?

<3

Neverbloom wrote:“So you just have no name?”

“Does it matter?”

Emi gave up; choosing instead to follow behind with her head drooped.

Entirely off topic, I'd love to see what Shizune would do to the poor little man in this situation. Unyielding challenge to the insane little man who will deftly parry logical attacks like a child's musings. The resulting fury would be a most enjoyable read.

So far, enjoying it quite a bit. While I'm not too much of a fantasy reader, this works well enough. Good job.

... that said you need to work on your people skills.

Oddball wrote:So, you don't like fanfiction, you insult your own work, you insult the works of others, and you say you might not ever come back or reply to comments.


Why should anyone even bother reading your story?

There's not very many new stories on the KSF right now that are of a size beyond that of a one-shot/scrap, barely a handful if that, anything new is often interesting, a change of pace if nothing else.

Ah, what just one line can do to your audience.

Right, let me clear this up. I said 'don't expect replies' because I don't usually hang out on this forum, because as I said, I'm not into fanfiction. I wrote this line so that if you say something, and I don't reply, it's not because I'm purposely ignoring you. Don't be offended, I just didn't see it.

Next, this story is inspired by Alice in Wonderland, not a crossover with. Emi is not currently in the world of Alice, just another random world I have made up. The point of this fan fiction is to do something different; I understand the characters deviate from the visual novel slightly. I wanted to run them through different situations, and show a different perspective to them. That is my reason for the different world; you will see that it is different to ours in more than visuals, and it carries with it different challenges.

Also, I did NOT insult the work of others. I can't get into fan fiction - I'm not saying fan fiction is bad. My friend is into it and he has shown me KS fan fics I felt were well written, provocative and interesting. I just find it impossible to suspend belief and accept something the author has not written. Personal preference. If you like fan fiction, great, I'm not criticizing you or it.

Lots of the things I have said have been taken out of context; let me set it straight. I wrote this fan fiction because it was amazing fun. It is not the best ever - that was a joke - but I do believe it is worth the read.

By the time Emi and Rin had emerged from the mountain, the sun was low on the horizon, painting the open field in all manner of orange hues.

“I just realized!” Emi cried. “We are going to be so late back to school. Everyone is probably already searching for us.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” Rin carried on walking.

“Well, we should really be getting back.”

Rin looked reluctant to leave, and Emi could understand why. It wouldn’t be easy going back to the real world, the world where having no arms was a disadvantage.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Rin walked over to a nearby bush. Sweeping the branches to either side, she revealed that ubiquitous door, nestled away once again. “See ya on the other side!” she yelled before stooping through the triangular doorway. Emi blinked and her friend was gone. Well, here goes nothing she thought. For the second time that day, Emi walked blindly through a small door, and it took her to a very strange place indeed.

…

As she stepped out of the small door, Emi was greeted by an equally beautiful sunset, cascading down upon the roof of Yamaku. She surveyed the rooftop; everything was as she left it. Walking back to her room, Emi was hit by a wave of exhaustion, and lent against the wall to prevent collapsing. Just as she turned the knob on her door, a voice rang out behind her. It was Miki.

“Hey Emi! Where have you been all-

“Ohgottogo” Emi ducked in before Miki could catch her. Diving straight into bed, she was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

…

The cool sheets felt good as they ruffled under Emi’s hands. She awoke slowly to silver strands of light filtering through her blinds; celestial flashlights beaming into her room. One glance at her clock revealed it was 3 AM; she hadn’t managed to sleep through the afternoon and night. She sighed and sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Well, this was bad. Her sleeping pattern had been severely thrown off by her adventures in the other world. ‘THEOTHERWORLD!’ she thought. The memories of the past day came flooding back. The Red Man, Fop, that strange small door, and most of all: Rin. Emi imagined her now, presumably curled up in her bed, her arms gone once again. She smiled. Kicking her legs off the side of the bed, she revealed a large dirt patch, a result of her laziness to remove them. Oh well, that could wait. Being as silent as she could, she grabbed her coat and headed for the roof.

…

Emi’s return to the other world was spotlighted by a large beam of moonlight, cutting through the trees to bathe her in soft white light. She gasped. The pine forest looked even more beautiful at night. The light that cut through the tree tops made the whole forest look like nature’s dance floor; the moon a still disco ball during a slow dance song. She walked through the forest, the calm silence bringing her a stillness she had never experienced before. Bursting out into the field she stopped, unable to take in the view that greeted her.

The heavens panned out above her like a painter’s canvas, littered with bright stars. The stars were so common that night; it seemed more like the sky were silver, dotted with black stars. The focus of this heavenly artwork was the moon itself, a bigger moon than Emi had ever seen. It bathed the whole world in dull white light, making vision almost as clear as day. Emi walked a few steps, her eyes glued upwards. Laying down she nestled in the soft grass, resting her neck and taking in the full view.

As she took in the moon – that bright, beautiful moon – her eyes began to close. Not from tiredness; this was a simple silence, calmness, stillness. Soaking in the moon’s rays, she felt the world give way around her; she gave up the world and all the weight bearing her down. She paused, suddenly worried. The world really had gone out from underneath her. She looked down, to see a field of silver far below. Oh, never mind. Wait! She rolled over in panic. The earth lay far below her; she was staring at a hundred meter drop.

Just as the panic set in, she began to fall. The wind rushed around her, whipping up a roaring sound that blocked out her thoughts. She screamed, only to have her voice stolen away. As she rocketed towards her death, she closed her eyes, trying to tame a fear she had never experienced before. Suddenly, an all too familiar sound filled her ears. She wasn’t in this other world anymore; she was sitting in the passenger seat of a small four-seater. Her screams, her fathers and those of the tires all mixed together, to form a horrific soundtrack. She curled into a ball as the approaching car grew ever closer. Right as that cold hard hand of terror gripped her heart, one image came into her head. Clearer than anything, her mother appeared before her, sitting at their dinner table, her heartwarming smile lighting up the room. Emi relaxed. Every muscle in her body gave way. She gave up.

Opening her eyes she found herself on the ground again. Well, almost. Emi stood thirty centimeters off the ground, floating. She looked down at her body. The white light that bathed her was not only the moon, but thin wisps that surrounded her. Fingers of light held her in their tight grip. The light originated from her back, and at the tips dissipated into the air like smoke. It took her a moment to realize what they were. They were wings. This would seem stranger, if she was not in such a serene mood, and had she not seen her friend bearing the arms of a lizard not twenty four hours earlier.

Embracing the calmness, she felt herself float further upwards. This time she was ready for the sensation. The more she shed her fears and worries, the lighter she became. Soon she was soaring high above the tree-tops, laughing in bliss. She had finally joined the birds in their private experience. The ground rushed beneath her, as did the wind around her, and for the first time in many years she felt free; free from any physical restraint. Free from the world.

After soaring for what seemed like hours, Emi gracefully descended. Taking a few steps, she decided to float back, gliding through the forest, dodging the trees like corners in a Yamaku hallway. When she finally came to a halt in front of that small door, a smile lit up her face so bright the moon had reason to envy. Boy, do I have something to show Rin!

…

Emi sat in her place on the roof, a place where she had shared so many times with Rin, and watched the orange and pink light of the sunrise appear over the horizon. Even after all she had seen in the other world, this sight remained powerful. It was just another painting; a different canvas, but equally beautiful.

TheGoatman wrote:There's not very many new stories on the KSF right now that are of a size beyond that of a one-shot/scrap, barely a handful if that, anything new is often interesting, a change of pace if nothing else.

*Insert shameless self advertising here*

“Umm, are you listening Emi?”

“Wha, what?” Emi drearily opened her eyes, much to their own protest.

“Or sleeping?”

Emi lifted her head to see the whole class watching her, every face wearing a wide grin. She blushed in embarrassment. It was only ten in the morning and she was asleep in class.

“You know, if you need to go to the Nurse I can send you. I’m trying to make this class as interesting as possible, but you’re going to need to pay attention to keep up."

You’re going to have to try harder Emi thought to herself as she opened up her book. Mathematics wasn’t exactly what she did for fun on weekends; in fact, the only reason she took it was because at least one math class was compulsory. She had to balance her head on her hand to keep it from hitting the desk, her eyes only stayed open by sheer willpower. Scribbling on her book she only barely stayed awake through the class. Her only motivation came from wanting to meet up with Rin, and going back to the other world.

As soon as the bell rang Emi was up and out of her seat in a flash. She had stored all her energy - God knows it hadn’t been going into equation solving - and she was first out the door. Stopping by her room to pick up her lunch she immediately made her way to the roof, hoping Rin would already be there. She had last seen her that morning, when she had helped Rin dress, and when Emi had been less helpful than her; hobbling around from lack of sleep much to Rin’s amusement. When she burst through the door a familiar sight greeted her; Rin standing against the fence, her auburn hair and tied off sleeves fluttering in the wind.

“Hey Rin” Emi said cheerily. “I’ve got something to tell youuu” she said in a sing-song fashion.

Rin didn’t turn from the fence. “Let me guess, you discovered your power?”

Emi scowled. “Yeah, how did you know? Anyway, last night I was lying there, and then all of a sudden, I mean, yeah, first I was, no, yeah at first I was lying in the grass and then-

“You started to fly?”

“Whaaa? Ruin all the suspense!” Emi moaned.

For the first time Rin turned away from the view, a slight smile on her face. “You told me everything this morning Emi.”

“Oh.” Emi slumped down on the chair with a sigh, the exhaustion taking over her body. “Yeah.”

“Like how handsome the Red Man is.”

Emi sat bolt upright. “I never said that!”

“Yeah, I’m joking” Rin laughed. “C’mon, you should probably get some sleep. You could just have the day off and tell Nurse you’re tired. He would let you; after all, you guys are best buddies and everything.” She sounded rather reluctant to give this advice.

“No. Not today Rin. The only thing that can boost my energy is some more adventure!” Emi could tell this was the response Rin was hoping for. “We still have half an hour, if we leave now we can spend some time in the other world before the next class starts.”

Rin’s expression returned to its normal blank state. “Well, last one there’s disabled.”

…

“Woohoo!” Emi soared through the air, hollering in delight. Racing forwards she would dodge quickly left and right, before blasting high into the sky, only to speed towards the ground like a falling star. Everywhere she went she would leave a trail of silver behind, the ashes of her smoky wings. Rin lay nestled among the vines and ferns, dozing underneath a large tree.

“Yeeehah!” Emi blasted off before returning to the ground once more, floating softly to Rin’s side. Rin opened her eyes lazily.

“Rin, why don’t you have any arms?” Emi asked, confused. Rin just smiled. Suddenly the ground around Emi’s feet came alive with movement. As Emi looked down in fright the roots and vines underneath her snaked up around her ankles. She flew into the air.

“Hey, no fair!” She cried. From up here she could truly see the extent of Rin’s power. Flowing from her shoulders were growing, twisting vines, sprouting growths as they moved. They slid across the fern like gnarled green snakes.

“Eww, what the hell Rin” Emi said, screwing up her nose. Rin grinned. With apparently no effort she sent the vines launching into the air, aimed directly at Emi. Emi dodged nimbly, flying to the side laughing.

“You’re going to have to do better than that” she taunted.

Rin leapt to her feet, her arms blurring for a moment before morphing into huge gorilla arms. Muscled beyond belief; they were far too big for her body.

“Haha, forget your big strong arms now! You can’t get me from down there” Emi said, twirling in the air and laughing blissfully. She spoke too soon. Just as the words had left her mouth she realized Rin’s idea. Rin ran at the large tree she had been sleeping under. Gripping the trunk with her huge hands she climbed quickly, reaching the top where she threw herself off, right at Emi. Twisting in the air she caught Emi with one arm and brought them both down to the ground. Emi squealed with excitement. Rin absorbed the shock and they rolled; a mess of laughing, squeaking, gorilla and girl hair.

Coming to a halt they lay there next to a large boulder, panting and sweating, trying to breathe over their laughter.

“You were saying?” Rin asked with a raised eyebrow. Emi giggled. Rin lifted the huge boulder next to them and spun around, hurling it behind her to smash against another, causing a huge boom. She flexed her hairy arms and they both roared with laughter.

As Rin stood, flexing in every bodybuilding position she could imagine, Emi stopped laughing. The joy drained from her face, slowly replaced by fear.

“Um, uh, Rin?” Emi lifted a trembling finger, pointing over Rin’s shoulder.

“Oh, yeah right, like I would fall for that.” Rin continued to flex.

A deep growl resonated from behind her, filling her body with cold terror. The growl was so low, so deep and primal, it shook the very foundations of her being.

“HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM”

Emi could see what Rin could only hear and imagine. Rising up behind Rin was a huge creature, not one of flesh and bone, but a monumental figure forged from living rock. The creature was humanoid, two legs and two arms, standing head and shoulders above Rin. Green tree roots spread over its limbs like sickly veins, pulsing venom. Purple smoke wafted out of the sockets that seemed to be its eyes. Both girls stared, frozen in shock.

Rin made the first move. Shoving the rock-figure with all her might, she brought Emi back into the real world. Emi’s eyes lit up, and before the figure could react, both she and Rin were taking off in a flash of silver light. However, much to her surprise, just as she was passing over the monster’s head, it recovered and reared up, grabbing them both and throwing them to the ground. They groaned and rolled aside. Rin jumped to her feet. In a flash two flaming, molten rods of magma smashed into the creature’s chest, sending it roaring backwards, flailing its pillar arms. It crashed to the ground with an almighty boom. This time Emi was ready to act. Grabbing Rin under the arms, she launched them both into the sky. When she was satisfied they had gone high enough, she dropped Rin.

By the time they had reached the top, Rin had realized Emi’s quick thinking. As she hurtled towards earth, with the massive creature staring up at her, she morphed her arms into two, pin-sharp steel spikes. Right as she was above the creatures head, she shoved the rods deep into the cavity where its head and shoulders met. In a split second the ends of her arms blurred, exploding from the tips outwards. As Rin fell onto it, it exploded with her arms, showering the area in rubble.

From above, Emi saw her friend disappear in an earth-shattering explosion. She raced downwards in panic. Much to her relief the dust parted to reveal Rin, crouched under a shield of iron. Emi breathed a sigh of relief.

“Stupid thing” Rin said, dusting off her uniform. “As dumb as you, thinking it could take me on."

“Hey, I helped” Emi said, hands on her hips.

Rin clawed the air with her now-tiger arms, her sharp talons raking the air. “Yeah, whatever.” She walked over to the pile of rubble, the remains of their once-fearsome attacker.

“What do you think it was?” asked Emi hesitantly.

Rin shrugged. “Doesn’t really matter now.” She turned to face Emi. “We should probably be getting back to school. Especially if you want your arm checked out before class.”

“My what?” Emi looked down at her left arm. The white cloth was stained with blood.

“Oh, yuck” She cried. She rolled back her sleeve to reveal a long thin red line running down her bicep.

“Yeah, I would suggest seeing Nurse about that” Rin said nonchalantly.

“Yeah, yeah probably” Emi replied with slight annoyance.

They dusted off their uniforms and returned to school, Rin disappearing to art class while Emi made her way to the Nurse, her mind churning out a viable excuse.

Welp, since half the forum has decided to hijack another fanfiction thread on such short notice, I might as well ask.

The only real travesty here is: "Why are you posting such short chapters every few hours if the fanfiction is complete?" I get there's a word limit per post but you're not posting Lord of the Rings here; the number of words posited could have been posted well before 48 hours. Furthermore I've read single posts in this forum by multiple authors of enough length to dwarf everything you've posted so far, and said posts were devoted to one chapter. This isn't Tumblr. Are you attempting to invent some new marketing ploy, like sexhoratium serials™ or something?

Better yet, why share this at all with us? Not the story, but the OP caveat. It has no bearing on the story written. Unless you're trying to fish for interest in your original fiction in the most passive-aggressive way imaginable, I don't quite see the point. "I might not respond to criticism after I publish this" would have sufficed.

On the other hand I find this entire pissing contest perpetrated by everyone involved quite schadenfreude so do carry on

“WHA!”

Nurse was on the verge of explosion. His head resembled an over-ripe tomato.

“First I’m telling you not to run in the halls, and now you come in with some gash on your arm?”

Emi realized this was going to be a hard sell. Placing her hands in her lap she unleashed her cutest puppy dog eyes. “Don’t worry abou-

“Don’t tell me not to worry!” the Nurse sputtered. He went quiet and dumped his head in his hands. His voice started back up, accompanied by a slight tremble. “Emi, I just really don’t want anything to happen to you. If you were to get hurt, I don’t know what I’d-

It was Emi’s turn to interrupt. She rolled her chair forwards and put her hand on his leg. “Nurse, it’s just a scratch, these things happen. I’m not going to die on you anytime soon."

“Promise?” Nurse looked up, his red eyes glistening. Emi was taken aback.

“No. Not ever.” She stated firmly, her lips pressed together tightly.

This seemed to ease his tension. He heaved a long sigh and straightened up. “You’re right, I’m overreacting” he sniffed. “It’s just, I’ve already…. Well, I won’t worry you with that. Just be safe ok?”

Emi nodded.

“Very well, let’s get you off to class. Here, show me that arm.”

…

Emi trudged over the sports field, her mind still dwelling on Nurse’s strange outburst. She felt bad for making him so emotional; she promised herself she would take more effort to stay safe, at least until whatever was bugging him got under control. She took her place on the far lane, head down, ready to out run her thoughts.

“Hey Emi, you wanna race?” It was Miki.

Emi felt her competitive spirit rise. “Sure, why not” she said, a devilish grin spreading across her face.

Miki returned an equally excited expression. They took places next to each other and waited for another track member to call the start. GO! And they were away.

Racing as fast as she could, Emi realized again why she loved running so much. Sure, flying was exhilarating, but there was something special about propelling yourself forwards, being in control of your body. Something that couldn’t be replaced. Every time her blades hit the ground, one needless thought would leave her head. The rhythmic impacts would draw her out of her mind, into the present moment.

When Emi saw Miki start to pull in front of her, she doubled her pace. Coming down the home straight she ran at a phenomenal pace, blasting past Miki. Realizing she would win by a large margin, Emi tried to slow down. Instead, her inertia carried her forwards against her best efforts, sending her tumbling to the ground. She groaned and rolled over. A hand came into her field of view. It was Miki.

Accepting her help up, Emi dusted herself off.

“Great race Emi” Miki said with a hint of reluctance. She knew Emi would have easily beaten her if she hadn’t have fallen.

“Yeah, you too” Emi replied. Turning to leave, she heard Miki pipe up.

“You know, you should let me bandage that knee, I don’t think the teachers would like blood on their seats.”

Emi looked down. Sure enough, the fall had grazed her knee, leaving a trail of blood running down her sock. Well, there went her promise.

….

Emi closed her door behind her, looking both ways down the hallway.

“Hey, have you seen Rin anywhere?” she called out to a passing dorm mate.

“No, no not recently. She said something about going ‘sculpting’? Just muttered it when she walked past” the girl said.

Emi grinned. She had just changed out of her running clothes; the school activities were over for the day. Obviously Rin had the same idea as her: there was no better place to spend your free time than the other world. Emi made her way up the stairs to the roof, making an effort not to bend her knee too much and crease the bandage. The pain from her graze continued to annoy her until she stepped through that perfect little door, and walking no longer became a necessity.

She made her way to where she expected Rin to be, and the pounding sound echoing through the mountain confirmed her suspicions. Emerging into the main cavern she saw her friend standing at that pillar once more, her furrowed brow expressing her concentration, swinging at her ‘sculpture’ with her huge iron arms. Emi had to admit, she had made progress. Although it still didn’t look like anything – at least to Emi it didn’t – Rin had sure battered it down to size.

“Hey Rin” Emi called from the cavern entrance.

Rin turned, a calm look on her face. Raising a now-bear claw, she waved back at her friend, before returning to her work.

Emi smiled. A familiar voice came from behind her.

“Ah, Emi dear, what a surprise seeing you here” the Red Man said pleasantly.

“Oh, hello” Emi replied, turning back to the entrance. “Um, I havn’t seen you in a -

“My dear, what happened to your arm?” he rushed forwards, grasping her forearm firmly. Too firmly.

“Oh, nothing.” Emi said, trying to wriggle free of his grip. “Just a cut, that’s all.”

“Are you going to live?”

Here we go again.

“Yes, yes I’ll be fine. Just a scratch.” Emi said, doing her best to settle his concern.

The Red Man narrowed his eyes. “Wait, how did you get this?”

“Some huge rock thing attacked us.”

Rin appeared behind Emi, the flames from her arms casting dancing patterns on the walls. The Red Man’s eyes widened in what appeared to be fear and disbelief. He turned away, covering his mouth and muttering to himself.

“Why, it can’t be.” He paced back and forth, constantly looking over his shoulder as if something were about to jump out at him.

“What? What is it?” Emi asked desperately. The tone in the room had become suddenly quite solemn.

The Red Man’s eyes locked on Rin. “Tell me more. Tell me everything about what happened.”

As Rin recalled the story of the fight, the Red Man continued to pace backwards and forwards, stopping to pause in suspense at a crucial moment, and wince at the gory details. Rin was quite the storyteller. It was the final detail that sent him over the edge.

“You defeated it! All by yourself?” He stared in disbelief. “Emi, I now understand the weight behind your wounds. Why would you not what to show them?”

Emi didn’t understand. “What? We told you the story. It’s a big ugly red line, who wants to see it?”

The Red Man grabbed Emi by the wrists and pulled her close.

“Emi Ibarazaki. Bear your scars in the open, so that all may admire your courage.”

Emi blushed at the passion in his speech. He saw her reaction and let go of her hands, backing away.

“May you be a beacon of bravery for all to see” He paused, bowing deeply before looking sincerely into Emi’s eyes. “For if Emi is smiling, what excuse have we?”

Emi looked away, baffled by the Red Man’s words. Rin stepped in.

“So, is there a reason we can’t peacefully frolic without being interrupted by rock-men?”

Emi took the hint, and thanked Rin in her head. Stepping out of the conversation, she steadied herself, trying to think of what the Red Man had said.

“I didn’t want to believe it at the time, but now it seems I have no choice. People around this world have been speaking of strange elemental figures rising up from nothing. I suppose your story confirms my darkest fear.”

“Surely it’s not that weird?” Emi said. “I mean, you know two girls who are pretty strange right? At least the thing can’t fly.”

The Red Man paused. “Yes, you two are quite unique. But it is not the figure’s build that makes it strange, it is its behavior. For nothing in this world is aggressive dear Emi, nothing would attack two calm girls. Never before has something threatened the peace of this land. All I can think is that by coming here, you two have introduced some foreign threat.”

“You mean it’s coming from our world?” Emi asked.

“What? Of course not” Rin snorted. “It might not be weird here, but it sures’hell is back home.”

“Well, we’ll help. I mean, we have to do everything we can to fix this right?” Emi looked pleadingly at Rin. She rolled her eyes.

“Your help would be much appreciated” said the Red Man. “After all, you do possess certain, uh, how do I say, abilities, that would be of great service.”

“We would be happy to help” Emi exclaimed, snapping to attention. Rin maintained her casual slouch.

“Yeah, I guess I’m in too then. God knows Emi will need someone to protect her.”
Emi pouted in protest.

“Very well then, it is settled. Together, we shall form an adventurer’s guild, and quench this threat from the earth.” The Red Man said, striking a grandiose pose. Emi pumped her fist in excitement. Rin rolled her eyes.

The Red Man’s eyes glinted with excitement. “We shall meet again soon, until then, farewell.”

Before Emi could open her mouth the Red Man had disappeared, back from where he came. A sudden silence filled the chamber.

“Hey Rin?”

“Yeah?”

“Why does he not seem to care about how I look? I mean, since the day I met him he has never seemed bothered by my legs.”

Rin scratched away at a rock with one big claw. “Have you seen the people that live here?”

The question took Emi by surprise. “Um, other than him, no.”

A wide smile spread across Rin’s face. “Tomorrow afternoon I will take you to the Town. Maybe then you will understand that we aren’t as strange as you think.”

Bad Apple wrote:Welp, since half the forum has decided to hijack another fanfiction thread on such short notice, I might as well ask.

The only real travesty here is: "Why are you posting such short chapters every few hours if the fanfiction is complete?" I've read single posts in this forum by multiple authors of enough length to dwarf everything you've posted so far, and said posts were devoted to one chapter. This isn't Tumblr. Are you attempting to invent some new marketing ploy, like sexhoratium serials™ or something?

Better yet, why share this at all with us? Not the story, but the OP caveat. It has no bearing on the story written. Unless you're trying to fish for interest in your original fiction in the most passive-aggressive way imaginable, I don't quite see the point. "I might not respond to criticism after I publish this" would have sufficed.

On the other hand I find this entire pissing contest perpetrated by everyone involved quite schadenfreude so do carry on

The work was written in chapters this size, just out of personal preference. I understand I could mash them together but in my opinion it would flow strangely as they were not written to be read that way.

As for the introduction - I don't understand the problem with it. It was just to introduce the work and give you a background on what I was thinking when I wrote it. I think it is quite unique, and assumed people here would to, so I wanted to explain to them that is was meant to be something they weren't used to.