Elcor wrote:One such fan fiction that mentions Niji was written by chaix called Flurries, a Flower, and crazy Females. It is a great story, personally I would recommend reading A Demon's Visit before hand.
And don't feel to bad about making Akira into an incestuous female who is also into boys who could be mistaken for a girl, and might be getting her rocks off more at the fact that her own sister could be listening in. If it makes you feel better there is an old saying, "As the world turns..."
I'll check 'em out. Heh, and while I don't plan on making this thing a vile pit of decadence (LAWL not yet, hahah; maybe, we'll see), I'll keep that in mind.
What I HAVE decided to do, though, is to extend this nonsense. You've only yourselves to blame. Here's a part two. And remember to be merciless in the condemnation of my writing and record collection.
***
"Your pain has no credential here
It's just a shadow of my wound."
-
Godflesh, "Mothra"
Sometimes standing out is the best way to blend in.
When people see my scars, the cruel ones point and laugh, while the crueler ones put me out of sight, out of mind, and talk about how bad it must be to be me when they think I can't hear them. Like I'm invisible, but not quite all the way. Like the cartoons I used to watch back at the orphanage when someone who was invisible was surrounded by a human-shaped dotted line. Like they can't see me but know that I'm standing right there.
When people see my scars, they often are so busy trying to desperately look away and act natural that they don't realize that I can see all of theirs. You can tell a lot about a person that way, how they react to something or someone like me, how they try to smooth over their curiosity or hide their disgust.
I don't really like people that much. It's not just because of my scars and how they react, though that's a big part of it. No, it's that most of them are liars. They keep up fronts that are more transparent than the dotted line girl I become, which is kind of a lie in itself, and one I'm not very happy about.
That's why I like... No, love Lilly so much. It's not because she's so nice to me, it's not because she can't see how ugly I am, it's not because she needs me as much as I need her. It's because she's honest. There's not a single hidden thing about her. Lilly is Lilly, all the time. She never turns into a monster like everyone else or an invisible girl like me.
That's why I like Hisao, too, even if he is kind of slow. He means well, and I think that of all of us, he has the best reason for being a good person. I don't think he'd let himself live with ever lying to any of us, or himself, because the next day, he might not even be alive. It scares me to think about things like that, but I'm good at hiding things like that.
I used to think that that was why I liked Akira, too.
Akira had taken Lilly and I into town to go shopping, along with their cousin, Hideaki. I remember that the first time I met him, I couldn't believe he was Shizune's brother; I also couldn't believe he wasn't actually a girl. He wasn't anything like her. Much more relaxed, maybe a bit more in his own world than I was comfortable with, and very analytic. He asked me point-blank how got my scars and why I was at Yamaku. Lilly scolded him and told him it was kind of a bad subject for me. He just nodded and left it at that.
A lot more blunt of a person than I'm used to, but he wasn't obnoxious about it. More importantly, he was honest. I don't think Hideaki even knows how to make a fake Hideaki, much less does he have one. So while I wasn't exactly comfortable with him, he was a good person.
We were about to cross the street to browse through a book store I had my eye on, when Lilly's phone started ringing. She excused herself and answered, talking very animatedly with someone, more than likely a classmate about the upcoming festival. I took a seat on a bench and glanced at the book store, then over to Akira and Hideaki holding hands.
I'd seen them do this before, and didn't think anything of it, aside from how much I envied gestures like that. It's one of those things that not having a family any more does to you.
But this was different. In that brief second they glanced at each other, I knew it was something else. They weren't looking at each other like my mother used to look at me. No, they were looking at each other like I'd seen the couples back at Yamaku look at each other, like how pretty much everyone looks at Lilly. I gasped a lot more loudly than I had wanted to, and they turned heads toward me.
I'd never wanted to be an invisible girl more in my life.
Hideaki seemed to tense up, and he looked up at Akira almost uncertainly. Akira then looked me straight in the eye, eyebrow raised.
I'd seen this look before. It was the same look she gave anyone else whenever she saw they noticed my scars. It was a look that cut me to the core and asked "What are you going to do about it?"
Later that day, as Akira dropped us off back at Yamaku, I tugged at her sleeve and told her that I wouldn't tell anybody. She grinned and winked at me, and asked "About what?"
Akira is a good person. She's not always honest, but the secrets she does have... I'm not sure I'm comfortable with them, but they aren't bad ones.
"If you wish to conquer pain
You must learn to serve it well."
Although it could be used for comedic effect (you know, the whole lovely "trap" thing), it's too awkward. I'm prolly way better off changing that.