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New Experiences Ch 5

And before I get any complaints, Pyjamas is spelled the British way, and coulée is a sauce you put on desserts. In this case it's raspberry

By the time we get back to the inn its 8:30 in the evening. It's not that late but I'm not much of a night owl anyway, and I doubt Hanako is either. We could both use some relaxation time.

We dump our items on our cases and proceed to take off our shoes. It feels great to let my feet breathe, rather than sweating away inside my shoes.

After walking around for almost ten hours, it feels good to relieve the pressure on my feet. We sat down when we had food, but apart from that my tootsies have been working full throttle for hours. Apart from getting our dinner later, I doubt we'll be going out tonight.

"It's good to be of my feet." I let out a relaxed sigh.

“Yeah, we've been walking around all day.”

“At least we get to relax before we get our dinner. It's open until 9:30 right?"

“I think so, but we should probably go soon. We're cutting it a bit fine...”

“I guess you're right, hope there's still some decent food left”

We make our way down to the restaurant for our meal. I pretty hungry now that I think about it. I wonder what kind of food they’ll have at the restaurant. Lobster? Steak? Rich, creamy pasta? I look towards the menu on the wall, which is written roughly on a chalkboard at the eateries entrance. Maybe I was bit optimistic in terms of what food would be available at a place that was this cheap.

“Pork ramen or beef stew? Could be worse I guess...”

“You get a starter or a dessert free with the main course though.” I look further down the menu for the dessert and starters.

“Carrot and leek or potato soup, or raspberry cheesecake.” I love raspberries and cheesecake!

“I'm getting the cheesecake and ramen.”

We make our way into the restaurant, which, like the rest of the Inn, is simple and quaint. There isn't really anyone here. There are a few people spread out among the various tables, but I imagine it's much busier early in the evening. We take a seat at the table near the entrance and wait to be served. A rather portly woman eventually comes to our table and asks what we want. She's wearing a rather regular waitress uniform, and fetches a pen and paper from a pouch around her waist. I tell her my order, after which she turns to Hanako.

The waitress stares for a second longer than she should, but asks for her order nonetheless. Hanako decides to order the cheesecake as well, except she orders the stew for her main course. She stutters while she does so, but doesn't seem to let it bother her. The waitress then gives us a bow and heads off to what I assume is the kitchen.

Our meal comes in good time and we heartily enjoy our main courses. It's surprisingly good, compared to what I thought I would be getting, and Hanako seems to enjoy her stew, despite it looking rather unappetizing. When we finish, the same waitress brings out our cheesecake. And it is awesome. The biscuit base is just solid enough to not crumble under my fork, and the creamed topping has hints of raspberry laced through it, as well as the coulée and actual raspberries that were adjourned on top. Hanako seems to full to finish hers, and pushes it to the side. I ask her if she wants the rest just to be sure, and upon her acknowledgement I devour her cheesecake as well.

After we finish, we thank the waitress for the meal and head for our room. Once there, I once again remove my shoes, this time to relax for the night. I decide to take my socks off as well. Hanako then does the same, wiggling her toes as her feet are free of her .shoes and socks.

“Today was a good day.” I let out a content sigh, full after my helping and a half of cheesecake.

"Yeah, I enjoyed it too."

"I'm not surprised, you found out your best friend isn't moving away. Who wouldn't consider it a good day."

"Not just that though, I mean before that. Going clothes shopping and stuff. I enjoyed it."

"Well you’re very welcome, considering it was just me dragging you around different stores even though I just bought a hat." Which is so cute by the way.

"But if there was somewhere I wanted to go, you'd come with me, right? So it's fine...really."

I still feel a bit bad, then again she is right. I stifle a yawn and rub my eyes. I'm not that tired but I wouldn't mind at least getting ready for bed. I open the cupboard next to the bathroom and pull out the futons and bedding. It's just a plain white futon with blue pillow and duvet, but it feels soft enough. I set them both out on the floor, although we may need to move the table if we want more space between them. Standing up from the table, Hanako speaks up.

“I'm going for a quick shower, I'd prefer not going to bed dirty when I can” Giving myself a quick once over, I realize I should probably have a shower as well. It wasn't that warm today, but we have been walking around for most of it. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that I'm a little covered in sweat.

As Hanako steps into the bathroom, I get my towel and shower supplies at the ready. I'd like to avoid the awkwardness I may have created this morning. I have some self-control, but when I eventually tell her I'm gay, I don't want her to think that I gave her a once over every time she stepped out of the shower. Not that I wouldn't if we were...together. She's cute, but I just don't feel right doing that to a friend who, in all likelihood, thinks I'm straight.

I nervously wait for the shower to stop and when it does, I wait for her to step out. When she does, once again in nothing but her towel, I wait until she's stepped away from the door and, without looking at her, walk into the bathroom. I hear her mutter something under her breath as I close the door, but am glad that I at least didn't stare at her this time. If I just fucking told her, I wouldn't have to do this. We could sort something out. Like, she could get changed in the bathroom, or tell me too close my eyes. She probably just thinks I'm rude now. I have to tell her soon.

After washing of the soap and rinsing my hair, I wrap myself in my towel and brush my teeth, then step out of the bathroom. I head for my case and fetch my pyjamas. Hanako is lying on her futon reading a book, the small light from the corner table sitting next to her, presumably to give her a better light for reading. After pulling out my pyjamas and expertly putting my bottoms on under the towel, I face away from Hanako and button up the top. I loudly yawn and get under the covers of my futon. I finally notice that Hanako has moved the table to the edge of the room to give us more space for the futons.

"Thanks for moving the table."

...I don't get an answer.

"Is something wrong? Did I..."

"It's fine, really. I'm just tired, we walked around a lot today."

"If you say so." I still think something is wrong though. Then again, I can't force her to talk. Maybe I should change the subject.

"What that you're reading?"

"Wuthering Heights. It's a sad book."

After giving me a rough outline of Heathcliff and his exploits on the moors, conversation quickly dries up. It doesn't seem like she wants to talk. As Hanako marks the page in her book, we both decide it's time for bed. With the light off, darkness envelops the room. The moonlight seeps in through the curtains and the sounds of the city surround us. I can make out Hanako's soft breathing in the middle of it all, and after deciding that starting conversion wouldn't bear fruit, I fall into my dreams.

I hate it when people try to make conversation with me when I'm reading. It's even worse when they try to start a conversation about the book they see me reading. I want to read my book, not stop reading it right in the middle so I can tell you about it!

edit: Also, Naomi you are clearly weirding Hanako out by trying too hard to not weird her out. Get your act together!

Typo warning: to be off my feet

New Experiences Ch 6

I wake up to the sounds the city outside. It's not any louder than any other city, but after living at Yamaku for some time now, I guess I've gotten used to the quiet of the country. The room is reasonably bright despite the curtains being closed, and is probably also somewhat responsible for waking me up. I groggily search the floor around me for my watch, and upon finding it discover it's only 9:40. I don't need to get up yet. Good thing too, I didn't sleep that well last night

I relax back into my futon, but soon realise that I probably won't fall back asleep. I instead turn my attention towards the only other point of interest in the room. Much to my annoyance though, Hanako is still asleep. Not that I have the heart to wake her up. Just because I'm awake doesn't mean she has to be. Since it's light I might as well find something to do, so I pull a manga out of my bag.

It's not light enough to see too clearly, but it's still readable. It's a comedy manga about a girl who has to pretend to be a guy in a really prestigious school. I would have preferred one of my yuri manga books, but this one will probably make me seem less perverted when I come out. A little while after Natsume had gotten used to the idea that I was gay, she slept over in my room like we used to. She saw I was reading one and she starting getting a little uncomfortable. To ease her worries, I tried to compare myself to a guy friend reading a romance story, but the way I worded it didn't help my case. It sounded like I was chatting her up.

Trying not to think of how awkward I could make my and Hanako's friendship, I instead try to focus on something else. I continue reading my manga, but after around ten minutes, I find my line of sight continuously wandering towards Hanako. I don't want to think of her this way. I really shouldn't. I'm not even sure exactly how I feel, but what I am sure of is that it's not as close to the friendship mark as it should be.

I try to get back into my manga, but it’s pointless. I just lie there, thinking about how wrong it's going to go when I tell her. I'd known Natsume for a long time, of course she'd take it well; we were best friends. And she knew that if wanted to try something, I probably already would have. Me and Hanako have only been good friends for a few weeks, a month tops. I've known her longer, but we never talked; I could easily be seen as a closet pervert. Maybe she'll think that the whole reason I came on the trip was to look at her ass in the shower. She might think I think she's easy. Or maybe she won't talk to me anymore. Not every girl is okay about sleeping in the same room as a lesbian. But Hanako isn't like that...is she? She doesn't seem like the kind of person who'd want to lose friends. But Lilly isn't moving any more. If she doesn't accept me, she could always go back to her. And she has Hisao as well. Two people she could be with rather than the lesbian who wanted to look at her while she changed. Why am I getting stressed over this? I was so confident yesterday. It isn't like I have looked at her or anything. I haven't got anything to be ashamed of. And I'm a nice person. She won't think I'm suddenly a bitch if I come out. But what if she does? No, that definitely won't happen; she isn't that shallow. But everyone has limits to what they accept, even Hanako, and she...her eyes are open.

Shit. How long was I looking at her? Did she even notice?

“Morning Hanako.” Really? Is that all you could think of? Well done, Naomi, well done.

She takes a second to reply, but eventually returns my greeting. In a happy voice too. Crisis averted.

“Morning Naomi."

“Have a good sleep?” I'm not actually that inquisitive, but I ask to keep the conversation flowing.

“Y-yeah, these futons are actually pretty comfy.” I have to agree, but I still couldn't sleep. Not that I was this worked up last night; it was just one of those nights where I couldn't sleep.

“What time is it?”

“9:54” I reply. She gives the same kind of sigh I gave ten minutes ago. She mustn’t be a morning person either.

“Not a morning person, Hanako?”

“I don't mind getting up early, but today we don't have to.”

“I agree. Why bother getting up at the crack of dawn when we have no reason to do so.” I emphasize my point by lying back down and closing my eyes. I open them to see Hanako looking at me, but I can't quite place the emotion on her face.

“You okay?” In hindsight, I was just staring at her face, so maybe I should have kept quiet. My question seems to bring her out of a daze. She blinks.

“No, it's nothing. I'm fine.” Naturally, this would make one more interested, but I follow my previous line of thought and stay quiet.

She stands up and does a cute little stretch, announcing with a yawn that she's going to the toilet. I settle back into my futon and snuggle into the covers. Maybe I shouldn't be so worried about telling her. I didn't worry this much when I was thinking about telling Natsume, then again I didn't think I might have feelings for her. I should just try and relax. Focus on the bad stuff only if it happens. Or when it happens.

The flush of the toilets announces Hanako has finished, and shortly after she walks out of the bathroom. She briefly looks at me with that strange look again before planting herself on her futon. She takes her book from the floor next to her and begins to read it. Feeling that there's nothing better to do, and that she'd probably rather read her book than talk, I announce I'm going for a shower. She gives me a quick nod and turns back to her book.

After stepping into the bathroom and closing the door, I begin undressing from my pyjamas and get my shampoo from the side. I turn on the shower and enjoy the feeling of hot water as it hits my skin. I wonder if Hanako's upset with me. We haven't talked much since yesterday, and even last night we barely talked. I asked her about her book to lighten the mood, but she didn't talk as much as she usually would about it. Maybe I'm just looking into this too much.

After turning off the shower, I reach for my towel and dry my hair. I then wrap myself up in my towel, and after grabbing my pyjamas I head out the bathroom. After I'm back in the main room and fishing through my suitcase for my clothes, Hanako says she's going for a shower as well. I reply with an “okay” and a smile, and she heads into the bathroom.

Once I've chosen my clothes and gotten dressed, I wait for Hanako to get out of the shower. Having already gone for my shower, I realise that I can't avoid her getting changed today like I usually do. This isn't good. I could just turn around when she gets dressed, but I'm not one hundred percent sure that I could contain myself. It isn't my fault that I'm a healthy eighteen year old lesbian in a room with a pretty girl. A naked...pretty girl.

Getting back to the problem at hand, I wait patiently for Hanako to open the door. After the shower stop, I ready myself to leave the room. I'll just say I'm going to the toilet, I have no reason to go out into the hall, and apart from the bathroom there's nowhere else for me to go. Besides, I actually do need to pee, so it isn't like I'm lying. Once the door finally opens, and Hanako has moved towards her suitcase, I walk towards the bathroom and tell her I'm going to the toilet. I'm almost through the door when she quietly speaks out to me.

“Hypocrite.”

“What?”

“Hypocrite!” She repeats herself, almost spitting at me as she says it.

“Why am I a hypocrite?” Does she...does she know?

“I thought you w-were my friend! The least you could do is t-tell me you're...u-uncomfortable.” Wait, what. What?

“What do you mea...”

“Don't lie to me! While we were shopping, you even called m-me pretty. And I-I believed you!”

“Please, calm down Hanako” What's happening, what did I do. She knows, shit. Does she hate me. Oh god, she hates me. “It's not that big of a deal, it was just so I didn't see you getting changed.” Please understand...please. My voice...I'm having going to...have...

“And how do you think that makes me feel!” She's crying, but her anger isn't dying down. Why is she so angry. What else was I meant to do. Please stop.

“You're horrible! How could you e-e-even think that was okay. I feel b-bad enough as it is without you p-pointing out how horrible my body is!”

Wait. She isn't...she's not talking about...me? Shit...I need to...sit for..the seizure...

“I'm...I'm sor..sorry Hn...Hanako, I tho...I didn't mean it. I'm hav..havi..” Shit, I don't...Am, am I crying? I have to..move...

“What?! How can you say you didn't mean it?! I s-saw you. You were even gawking at my f-face when you thought I was sleeping!”

I need to sit...sit down.

“Why w-would you...why d-did you avoid me...what made you think it would help me?!

"Beca...I..I'm gay! I'm...”

Gone.

Just when things were getting interesting, what a perfectly annoying yet predicable cliffhanger.

Guest wrote:Just when things were getting interesting, what a perfectly annoying yet predicable cliffhanger.

Yeah, well, it had to happen eventually. Was either this or she got hit by a bus.

scott1and wrote:

Guest wrote:Just when things were getting interesting, what a perfectly annoying yet predicable cliffhanger.

Yeah, well, it had to happen eventually. Was either this or she got hit by a bus.

Very true. It had to come out one way or another. This time it was good ole confusion and misinterpretation, plus it adds to the drama. I liked this chapter.

well_this_is_awkward.jpg

edit: The seizure honestly seems like overkill.

xaolindragon wrote:Very true. It had to come out one way or another. This time it was good ole confusion and misinterpretation, plus it adds to the drama. I liked this chapter.

Confusion and misinterpretation seem to be a constant problem for Hanako, don't they?

CNB wrote:The seizure honestly seems like overkill.

When planning out the story, I actually thought this for a few early versions.

But ultimately, Naomi is at Yamaku for her epilepsy, and since people with epilepsy can generally attend regular school, I surmised that hers may be worse than average. This can't be proven, but it seems likely, and since some epileptic people can have stress or fear induced seizures, I thought it worked out for the story.

Something I didn't think about when I first read the chapter:
I think epileptics don't usually lose consciousness when they have a seizure. But as you said her case of epilepsy is apparently more serious than usual...

Mirage_GSM wrote:Something I didn't think about when I first read the chapter:
I think epileptics don't usually lose consciousness when they have a seizure. But as you said her case of epilepsy is apparently more serious than usual...

I found it really hard to write this bit. I have a friend who has epilepsy, but she said she can't remember what happens before or during a seizure. Epileptics can and do lose consciousness, but it differs from person to person.

In the end, I decided that Naomi does tend to lose consciousness, as well as her symptoms afterwords and how long it takes her to recover, but that's for the next chapter.

And I did do my research on this beforehand. If you read the beginning, she hasn't had a good nights sleep, nor has she taken her medication. These both make a seizure more likely to occur, and hers may not have happened if she'd slept better and taken her meds.

Well... I'm hooked.

scott1and wrote: “Why w-would you...why d-did you avoid me...what made you think it would help me?!

"Beca...I..I'm gay! I'm...”

Gone.

And that? Fantastic.

I first noticed your fanfic on Fanfiction.net and a small criticism that was levied at it was that it seemed implausible to have Hanako stay in presence of Naomi with only a towel on, as she didn't seem to have progressed enough to feel comfortable that way. After the latest chapter, however, I can interpret that as a conscious effort by Hanako to try and overcome her fear to be judged on her burn scars alone, an attempt to try and be comfortable at least with the friend she travels with. As her reaction (although due to a misunderstanding of Naomi's attitude) shows, it's still going to be a long road for her but, little by little...

Zoram wrote:I first noticed your fanfic on Fanfiction.net and a small criticism that was levied at it was that it seemed implausible to have Hanako stay in presence of Naomi with only a towel on, as she didn't seem to have progressed enough to feel comfortable that way. After the latest chapter, however, I can interpret that as a conscious effort by Hanako to try and overcome her fear to be judged on her burn scars alone, an attempt to try and be comfortable at least with the friend she travels with. As her reaction (although due to a misunderstanding of Naomi's attitude) shows, it's still going to be a long road for her but, little by little...

Yeah, I wanted to show Hanako was trying to get more comfortable with Naomi, but also testing her to see if she would still be her friend if she saw her scars at the same time.