I step out of the upstairs corridor and steps down the stairway. I'm greeted by deafening dance music, but, at the foot of the stairs, I'm also greeted by Mio and a friend of her, a tall girl with electric blue hair.
We can't talk, but she seems genuinely happy to see me. For a moment, I forget about Rin, or at least I try to. After all, why should I turn my back on Mio to care for someone else's girlfriend? Can't I deserve to be a little selfish too?
Apparently, I'm not good at it, because when the dance music dies down, and the DJ asks us to stay for Ken, she asks me with a frown:
"Something's wrong?"
"Not really," I force myself to smile.
It's not that difficult, looking at her. She's really cute.
My smile stops when I find myself on all fours on the dirty ground, feeling pressure on my back before someone rolls down beside me. Someone far above me, possibly Mio gasps while I check my heart. A bit accelerated, but stable. Good. I slowly picks myself up, and look at who has tackled me down in the process.
It's Rin.
And it looks like she's having trouble with her balance, as she struggles to stand again. I end offering her my hand. Instead of making any move to accept it (although now, I'm not sure what would count), she just stares at me with wide eyes. With fear?
She manages to wobble back on her feet and steps toward me, lounges forward, and end in my arms, the side of her head directly on my chest.
She frowns a bit before straightening up and looking directly at me. I still have a hand on her shoulder, and I feel the need to keep it there and steady her.
"Is your heart okay?" She asks. "I can't tell." She frowns again, visibly annoyed. "I don't know if it's the pills or the sake, but something's messing with my ears."
From the way her speech is slurred, I'd say it's the sake messing with her brain. Where she was and where she found it will remain a mystery, I suppose.
I notice she's still looking at me with wide eyes, and I take the time to confirm I'm okay. She sighs and lower her gaze, and I feel her shoulders relax.
My beer is still on the floor, forgotten.
Rin tries to step away, stumbles, and both Mio and I need to reach out to keep her from falling.
"We'd better bring her back to the dorms," she says.
I see her pouting while she says that, looking at Ken setting up. Her friend seems frustrated too. But I can't disagree with that, seeing how I was the one who felt he shouldn't leave Rin alone, even when she was stable.
In the end, I propose to do it alone, and after making sure Rin is okay with that – a question that's answered with a simple nod – Mio agrees. She then proceeds to teach me the route to the dorms, waiting for me to be able to repeat it entirely before letting us go. Rin tries to interrupt our conversation once, but after looking alternatively and Mio and I, mutters "never mind" and lets us finish.
That's how I end, one hour later, having to remind Rin that we've reached our stop and should get out of the train. She's been silently leaning on me during the whole trip, and I can still feel the heat in my side. But I choose not to over-think it. With Rin, I know too well that physical contact doesn't necessarily mean anything. After all, she's the first (and only) girl I ever led to orgasm, and she shut me out of her life soon afterwards.
I lead Rin to her door, and fishes her keys in her pockets – she's wearing one of those tactical pants full of easy reachable pockets, it takes me time to find the right one.
I open the door, and Rin enters the room. It's tiny – I guess Yamaku's expensive accommodations and the available space in my country university gave me high expectations about what a dorm room should be? But it's really tiny, I think it's smaller than my bedroom at Yukio's place. Or it's because it's cluttered with paintings and books? Anyway, it looks more like a corridor with a bed, a small desk, and a small window, than a proper bedroom.
Rin sits on her bed with a contented sigh, then lies down, and closes her eyes for a second, before she bolts upright, staring at me.
"What's wrong?" I ask.
"The room is moving too much when I close my eyes. It's scary."
She leans her back against the wall, raises her feet, now naked, on the bed in front of her, and keeps looking at me – or through me.
"First time you drink so much?" I ask.
"I don't know," she shrugs. "But tonight, I don't think I'll be able to evacuate it on a painting. My feet are too fuzzy. Maybe it's the sake. I have to remember: sake is not as fun as beer. Instead of making the head bubbly, it makes the feet fuzzy."
I nod. "Will you be okay?"
"Don't go."
"What?"
"Please."
I sit by her side on the bed, in the darkened room. Which is not that dark, the public lighting outside the window is quite strong, and the curtains are opened. As the silence stretches, I find it hard not to try to break it, but can't find anything worthy of it, so I just let my thoughts wander.
Plus, I'm not sure Rin's brain is in a state where she can have a meaningful discussion with me. She finally relaxes on my shoulder, but when I think she might be able to sleep, she suddenly stands, step away, and fumbles with the door handle.
I regain my senses and quickly help her, and she dashes to the bathroom. I follow to find her kneeling in front of the toilet. The sound and smell of her vomiting hit me hard, and finish to wake me up. I step in to help her, supporting her head with a hand on her brow and trying with the other to get her hair out of the way.
Rin's exhausted by the retching when she finally gets up, and I have to help her remain upright while I clean her face and give her some water. When I bring her back to her room, she lies on the bed and closes her eyes. Soon, she's even snoring lightly.
I look at her for at least five minutes before I decide to act and put her to bed properly. I remove her dirty pants. The long-sleeved t-shirt will make an acceptable pyjama, and is acceptably clean. I wonder a bit about her bra, but can't find it a good idea to undress Rin completely to remove it, so I just tuck her under the covers like that. She looks so peaceful, now, that I have to refrain from giving her a good-night kiss.
And now, I'm trapped. I really don't feel like going back outside now. Plus, Rin's last coherent talk was to ask me to stay. I also remember how I had decided, what seems ages ago, that she shouldn't be left alone tonight. In the end, I just lie on the floor against her bed, and try to catch a little bit of sleep.
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Scene 4 this way
