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It’s the next day. I texted Daiki last night and asked him for one more day before we meet. I felt bad, but I still don't know what to do. He was very sweet and patient about it.

As important as responding to his confession is to me, I also have some other concerns right now. I need to try and fix things with Akane, who has ignored all of my text messages since last night.

And I need to get Chiyo and Akane to talk to one another. I don't know what happened between them. But Akane said they haven't spoken in two years. So they've never talked about whatever caused them to stop being friends. I think they will both feel better if they do.

Akane seems willing to talk to her based on what she said yesterday before she got upset. And I think if Akane would avoid being rude, Chiyo would talk to her too. They used to be best friends, so they can't really hate one another. Not entirely. Can they?

I have a plan to make that happen. I'm not very clever, so it’s pretty simple. But I think it could work.

First though, I need to get Akane to talk to me. I'm standing in front of her door now. This is hard and I'm worried she won't want to be friends anymore, but last time she left my room upset, we just talked it out and things were okay. I'm nervous, but I have to do this.

I whisper, “Dorayaki,” to myself and knock on her door. There's no response.

I knock again and say, “Akane…i-it's Nagisa. I just…I want to talk to you, if you'll let me.”

When she opens the door, she looks more bashful than anything, which surprises me, “H-hey.”

“H-hi,” I look down at my feet, “I just…wanted to apologize.” I look back up at her, “I’m very sorry for making you feel like you aren't my best friend. B-but…you are, you really really are. I promise. That won't change e-even if I have a boyfriend.”

She sighs, “I already felt like a terrible person. Watching you apologize all earnestly like that and looking at me with your cute little face makes me feel like even more of one.”

She opens her door and invites me in, and we sit down on the bed together.

“You don't have anything to apologize for. I do. It's all me messing things up again. Like always.”

“Y-you didn't!”

She laughs bitterly, “You're too nice to say it, but I did. Didn't what I did upset you?”

I think for a moment, “Well…yes. I was worried about you.”

She shakes her head in disbelief, “But not mad?”

I shake my head.

“Well…I'm mad. At myself. And so embarrassed and ashamed for acting how I did. That's why I didn't respond to texts or anything. I didn't know what I could possibly say. I accused you of treating me differently for being gay when you never ever do. That…that wasn't right of me.”

She takes off her glasses and pinches the bridge of her nose, “I'm just…out of control sometimes. You know that, by now, I guess. Yesterday I had…lots of feelings about everything and it just overwhelmed me and I took it all out on you. I’m so sorry. I…I need to work on myself.”

“I-It's okay. What kind of feelings?”

“Well…it was scary talking to Chiyo for the first time in two years. And the Daiki thing caught me off guard, and then there was lots of jealousy.”

“Huh? Who are you jealous of?”

Her eyes get wide for a moment and then her face relaxes, “Oh. Um…Chiyo. I meant Chiyo, because she knew about Daiki and I didn't.”

“You should know…she figured it out on her own. I guess…because Daiki asked her about the Great Dango Family, and asked her and Ken to leave early so he could confess in the club room at lunch. So, when I was at home, she texted to see if he had confessed and I told her she did. But that was all she knew.”

Akane smiles softly, “You don't have to explain yourself. You’re not obligated to tell me everything before you tell her. I don't have a monopoly on your friendship. I'm just…a crazy person. And I hate that part of me.”

I hug her, “Y-you aren’t crazy. And you shouldn't hate any part of yourself. I don't.”

She sighs and hugs me back, “Maybe ‘crazy’ is a strong word, but I had lots of intense ugly feelings and doubts swirling around inside me and I let them get the better of me instead of acting like a grown up. It happens to me more than it should.” She laughs wryly, “My therapist calls it ‘emotional hijacking.’”

I break the hug, “W-well…it's okay to get upset sometimes. It was a hard situation. You didn't know Chiyo would be there. And I can see why it would upset you that she knew about Daiki before you did.”

She smiles , “I'm very lucky I have such an understanding friend. How can I ever repay you for continuously forgiving me every time I do something stupid and impulsive?”

This gives me an idea.

“W-well…normally I'd say, ‘You repay me just by being my friend,’ but…there is something I really want you to do…Something I think you know you need to do.”

Akane sighs and bows head, “Yeah, okay, fine. I'll do it. I'll talk to her. And…I'll keep my emotions in check. Hopefully.”

…

After I got Akane to agree to talk with Chiyo, I called Chiyo and asked her to come by at 4 to talk about Daiki. She doesn't know Akane will be here too. I feel bad about lying to her, but I don't think I could have convinced her to come otherwise.

Akane's on my bed with the dango, and I'm sitting at my desk.

Once I tell Chiyo to come in, she sighs when she sees Akane and then looks at me, “I had a feeling you would do this. Especially with how nervous you sounded on the phone.” She rolls her eyes, “You're an awful liar. But…I came anyway.”

“Um…h-hey, Chiyo.”

Chiyo ignores Akane and looks at me. I think she wants me to explain myself.

“I-I'm…sorry for tricking you. But…I just want you to talk about what happened between you. I just want you to be friends again. I-if it's possible. I want to be able to be with both of you at the same time. Even if that can't work out…you two need to talk about it. Whatever it is.”

Chiyo sighs and sags her shoulders and sits down on the bed, but as far as possible from Akane, “What do you think, Akane? Should we listen to her? She's done alot for me, so I'm willing to do this for her. What about you?”

Akane sighs and squeezes the dango, “You're… making it sound like this is a competition for who is the better friend to her.”

“Yeah, well. Maybe that was on purpose. What's your answer?”

Akane chuckles, “I'm willing to do it for her too. But…we should do it for us too. Bury the hatchet…before we graduate, at least.”

Chiyo nods.

I smile, glad to see they are willing to try. “Okay…I will leave you two to talk about it.”

I stand up and they both look at me with desperation in their eyes. Chiyo says, “You have to stay.”

Akane nods, “We need you here to moderate. We have tried talking about this before…and it…got violent.”

“V-violent?!”

What do they think I can do if that happens? I'm much smaller than both of them.

Chiyo nods, “I-It's been two years though. We're further removed from it. And more mature. So it probably won't go that way. But we need you here to intervene just in case. You'll snap us out of it.”

Akane nods in agreement and gestures for me to take a seat.

“Okay. I'll stay.” I sit back down at my desk.

Chiyo looks to me, “Which of us should start?”

“Wh-what? I don't even know the subject of the argument…how can I choose?”

Akane nervously says, “I-I’ll start. Since, the thing I did is what…led to us not being friends.”

Chiyo nods, “Okay, can I ask a question to get you started?”

Akane gestures for her to.

“Why the hell did you dig through my student records behind my back to find out about my health?”

I try to stifle a gasp, but don't succeed.

This is what she didn't want me to know about. I understand why now.

Akane looks at me with some serious shame and embarrassment on her face, and then bows her head to Chiyo, “I…thought you weren't being honest with me. You said you had anemia. But you got so nervous and depressed any time health stuff came up. I was really worried about you, but you wouldn't let me in. And it hurt my feelings.”

Chiyo hisses, “Oh, your poor feelings.”

Akane frowns, “I know it's dumb. I was also really worried about you. That you had something…fatal, and I wanted to know so I could help.”

Chiyo crosses her arms and clenches her jaw, “Do you understand now why that was bad?”

Akane nods, “I knew it was wrong then. But…when I found out you were lying, I lost it. I just…couldn't believe you didn't tell me. It hurt a lot. I got irrational. You…know the rest.”

“Yeah, you showed up at my door and yelled at me for lying to you, even though you had done something horrible. You weren’t even trying to comfort me after what you found out. You were just berating me. So I slapped the shit out of you, slammed my door shut, and never spoke to you again.” She nods towards me. “Until Nagisa.”

Akane sniffles and nods, “Yeah. A-and that brings us to today.”

Chiyo seems surprised that Akane is tearing up, and some compassion shows on her face, “I am sorry I lied to you. I wanted to tell you. So many times. But I just…couldn't. I have so much shame about it. I still do. That's why it hurt me that you went behind my back. It's my body. It was up to me to decide to tell people or not and I didn't want to.”

Akane starts to cry more openly, “Y-you're right. I'm so sorry, Chiyo. It wasn't right, what I did.”

Chiyo sighs, “I-it's okay. Thank you for never telling anyone else about my situation. Even after I hit you. Hell, you could probably have gotten me expelled.”

Akane smiles and wipes her tears, “You didn't turn me in either, even though I broke a ton of rules and was a complete bitch.”

Chiyo laughs, “Let's agree we were both bitches. Although…you were more of one. 75-25 at least.”

Akane chuckles and nods, “Agreed.” She pauses for a moment, lost in thought. “There is…one thing I want to know, before we put this all behind us.”

A hesitant Chiyo says, “Okay…”

“Why didn't you think you could tell me? I wouldn't have thought less of you. You had to know that.”

Chiyo sighs, “It's more about me than you, Akane. I just didn't want anyone to know that I can't ever be pregnant. That’s all that matters.”

Akane's eyebrows shoot up and she looks over at me, “Sh-she knows?”

Chiyo nods, “She's the first friend I ever told. And that was two years later. That's how long it took for me to feel ready to tell someone.” She chuckles, “And I only told her because she's an angel.”

Akane smiles at me, “She kind of is, isn't she?” Akane sighs, “But I still…don't understand why you didn't trust me. We were best friends, weren't we?”

Chiyo bristles, “So, still not past this, huh? I’ll say it one more time. I. Didn't. Want. Anyone. To. Know. We just have to leave it at that. I shouldn’t have to explain myself to you any more than I already have. If you can't accept that…” She trails off and shakes her head.

“Um…Akane…”

She snaps at me, “What Nagisa? I thought you were staying out of this unless we got out of hand.”

“I-I know…but, can I see you for a minute?”

She sighs and comes over to me with a scowl on her face. I gesture for her to come closer, and I whisper, “Did she know…back then, about…y-your thing you don't want everyone to know?”

Akane’s frustrated face dissolves into a surprised one. Then she looks ashamed. She nods, and goes back to Chiyo on the bed.

When she does, Chiyo laughs, “What was that about?”

“I'm gay.”

Chiyo’s eyebrows shoot up so far they are no longer visible beneath her hair. Then she looks at me and back at Akane.

She points from Akane to me and back again. “Ohhh…and you two are…?” She turns to me, “Wait, is this why you're unsure about Daiki?”

Akane and I both laugh, then Akane says, “No. J-just friends.” She pauses for a moment and then grins, “Though…we did kiss once.”

I feel my face flush, “A-Akane!!!”

She laughs, “Sorry! I'm trying to rebuild a broken friendship, okay! This is what you wanted! So I'm sharing some secrets!”

Chiyo smirks at this information, and then thinks for a moment, “Wait, so why did you tell me this now?”

“Because…I knew I was gay back then, and I didn't tell you. Or want you to know. Even as my best friend. It was because I was worried you'd look at me differently.”

Chiyo nods, “Exactly.”

“Yeah. That's what Nagisa just made me realize. I did the same thing. So…I understand now, why you didn't tell me. I…forgive you, and I'm so sorry for everything. I was way more in the wrong than you ever were. I’m…messed up. I feel like…I’m not good enough all the time - for my family, for my friends - and it makes me crazy sometimes.” She nods towards me, “I even got super angry at this little angel yesterday because I felt that way.”

Chiyo sniffles, “I forgive you too. And I’m sorry too. I should never have hit you…and we probably should have talked it out at some point in the last two years. I’m the reason we didn't.”

The two of them scoot close and then briefly hug each other as they both sniffle.

Then Chiyo smirks at me, “So…now that we’re friends again…tell me about that time you kissed Nagisa.”

Well, at least they're friends again. Even if I wish Akane wouldn't tell this story.

…

I just went to dinner in the cafeteria with Chiyo and Akane. There's definitely still awkwardness and tension between them, but it isn't suffocating like it was. For one thing, they aren’t calling each other names. Now we’re back in my room. We’re going to do what we originally intended: Talk about Daiki.

I’m laying on the bed and holding my dango. Akane is sitting at the head of the bed and Chiyo is at my feet.

Chiyo asks, “Is it because he’s so big? You’re like…the tiniest girl here, apart from maybe that second year girl on the track team. And Daiki might be the biggest guy in the prefecture.”

“N-no. It isn’t because of that.”

Akane scoffs and says, “Seriously, Chiyo. Do you even know Nagisa? Do you really think a guy's medical condition would keep her from liking him?”

Chiyo narrows her eyes at Akane, and so do I.

She looks down, “Um…s-sorry. This is taking some getting used to.”

I pat her on her shoulder, “I-it's okay. But try your best to be nice, okay?”

She nods and looks at Chiyo, “It's embarrassing to say out loud but…I'm jealous that you two are close. A-and that's why that happened. I'll do better.”

Chiyo laughs, “It’s okay. I pretty much feel the same. You two actually seem closer, so I think I'm probably more jealous. It does take some getting used to.” She looks at me, “Anyway, to be clear - it isn't because he’s big.”

I shake my head, and then quietly say, “Um…I think…I k-kind of like it.”

Akane laughs and Chiyo says, “I missed that down here.”

Akane grins, “She likes that he’s big.”

I frown, “I-Is there something wrong with that?”

Chiyo giggles, “Whatever butters your biscuit, you know?”

I sit up in confusion and look at Chiyo, “B-butters my…huh?”

Akane and Chiyo exchange a look and start laughing. I’m lost, but I smile because it's the first time it's been easy to believe that they used to be best friends.

Once they are done laughing, Chiyo says, “Anyway, so it's not his looks.”

I shake my head and smile, “He’s really handsome. And I really like his big hands. And arms. And chest. I guess…I like his big…everything.”

Akane and Chiyo exchange the same look from before and start laughing again.

This time I sigh about not getting the joke.

Akane notices and pats me on the head and says, “Sorry, sorry. You're just very innocent and it's cute. We'll stop laughing.”

Chiyo nods, “So, you think he’s attractive. Does that mean you are unsure about something else about him? Personality wise?”

“I…don't think so. He's cranky sometimes I guess, but I don't really mind. I think he’s really sweet, and I like that he loves animals, and he’s really smart, and funny. And I feel…happy and warm and fuzzy-”

Akane interrupts, "It really sounds like you like him.”

Chiyo nods, “Agreed. You sound pretty damn sure about it to me.”

“I-I do?”

Akane says, “Everything you’re saying would normally mean that, yeah. But you’re still unsure?”

I nod.

Chiyo says, “Hmm…the only thing I can think is you’re still in love with that dumb boy from back home.”

I sit up and say, “H-he’s not dumb!” with more force than I meant to.

Chiyo laughs and rolls her eyes, “If you're still reacting like that to that joke, you must still love him.”

I lay back down. “But…I barely think about him any more. I haven't spoken to him in months.”

Akane looks serious for a moment, “Well…there isn't anyone else, is there? Anyone you feel…a special kind of close to? Who makes you feel warm and fuzzy and happy any time they are around? Maybe…maybe that’s why you’re unsure?”

I shake my head, “There isn’t anyone else like that.”

She nods, “I see. Um...well then…you should really think hard about that boy from back home. And Daiki. And figure out how you feel about both of them.”

I sigh, “I was hoping you two would just give me an answer for him.”

Chiyo smiles, “Love…is a complicated thing. It can be hard to have a clear answer.”

Akane nods, “We both agree it sounds like you like Daiki. But if you’re hung up on this other boy, you aren't ready to be with him. Only you can figure that out.”

…

I'm in my room alone now.

After talking with Chiyo and Akane, and thinking it over, I think I've decided that I want to be Daiki's girlfriend.

I'm putting the Great Dango Family phone strap he got me on my phone. I hadn't yet, because it felt like doing so meant I accepted his feelings.

I smile at the phone strap and think about the person who got it for me. He’s so sweet to me and a really great guy. And I think he’s handsome. And he’s smart. And I like the idea of being in his big arms.

Just as I’m blushing over that last part, my phone rings in my hand.

Flustered, I answer, “H-hello?”

“Nagisa! Hey, it's Tomoya.”

My heart starts beating very fast.

“T-t-tomoya?!”

He laughs, “Yep, that's me. Your caller ID should have told you that, though.”

I laugh awkwardly, “I…forgot to check. Not too used to it yet.”

“Ahaha, that sounds about right. Anyway, I hadn't heard from you in a while and was thinking about you, so I decided to give you a call.”

He was…thinking of me? I didn't think he would be doing that. Does it mean something?

“You there? Is our connection bad?”

“I'm…here.”

“Good. How are things up there?”

“Good. It's…so nice to hear from you.”

“Yeah, nice to hear you too. So they treating you right up there? You been healthy?”

“Well…I got sick, but my medication and the nurse, and my friends here helped me. It was only a little over two weeks.”

“That's great, Nagisa. I am so happy to hear that. Great that you have some friends to help, too.”

“Yeah. I'm…better at making friends this year. I learned from last year.”

“Awesome.”

“Oh! And, I'm in drama club.”

“Yeah? Wasn't sure they would have that kind of thing.”

“They do! Only four members, but we’re doing a play in a few weeks.”

“That's great! Sounds like things there are going really great for you, better than at our school.”

“Yeah…in most ways, that's true. I miss all of you, though. How are things for you?”

“They are decent. Cram school is pretty tough, but Kotomi is making sure I'm on top of things.”

“That's good. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

“I will. Hey, listen, Kotomi and I will be back home this summer. Are you going home?”

I want to see him so badly. But…I don't think it's a good idea. This conversation isn't either. I could talk to him for hours like this. But I shouldn't.

“U-um…I might be. I'll let you know. Hey, I've…gotta go. Thanks for calling.”

He says goodbye and I hang up. I sit in silence for a moment, staring at the wall. Then I take the Great Dango Family phone strap off of my phone. I pick up my dango plush, get in bed with it, and I cry.

I invited Daiki to my room today to respond to his confession. He’s going to be here any minute. I'm sitting on my bed right now tightly gripping the fabric of my comforter.

I'm dreading doing this, but he deserves an answer. I think I feel a little something for him, but my call with Tomoya last night proved I'm not over him. And I can't ask Daiki to wait around while I try to work through all that.

He's already waited patiently for far too long.

Just as I'm thinking about all this, there's a knock on the door. I open it and invite Daiki in. When I turn around and see him smiling at me, I know I can't wait any longer.

“I…I'm so sorry, Daiki.”

He frowns, “So, you don’t feel the same?”

I shake my head, “I'm in love with someone else. A boy from my old school.”

He bows his head a little and his shoulders slump, “I see.”

“I know how it feels, to have feelings for someone and not have them returned. I would never want to make someone feel the way I feel about him. I wish I could stop loving him. I wish I loved you instead. More than anything right now. Then neither of us would have to hurt. But…I d-d-don't feel that way….” I lose my composure and start to bawl.

To my surprise, he hugs me. Well, ‘picks me up’ might be more accurate, since my feet aren't quite touching the ground. His arms and chest pretty much envelop me. And he's warm. It's very comforting. It brings back memories of hugging my dad when I was little.

“Don't cry. I'll be okay.”

I really am pathetic. I shouldn’t be crying like this. I just hurt him. The person I just rejected is comforting ME.

I hug him back as best I can. But my arms don't really reach around him.

He puts me down and I look up at him with a smile, “U-um…thank you. That helped. Y-you're a good hugger. Thank you for…understanding. I hope we can be friends.”

He nods, “Of course we can.” He hands me a handkerchief.

I use it to wipe my tears.

He smiles at me, “I hope…even though we didn't work out, you'll remember what I told you when I confessed.”

I nod, “I do. Y-you…said I'm…the prettiest girl you've ever known. And…that I am an amazing woman. It's hard to forget.”

He laughs, “Good. Remember that about yourself. That's important to me.”

I nod, “I will. I…hope you know too, that you're an amazing man. I know…you probably don't want to hear it from the girl who just turned you down, but…”

He laughs, “No, go on. I like hearing nice things about me.”

I giggle, “Well…you're handsome, and the smartest person I know, and so caring and sweet. Any girl would be lucky to have you. I would be lucky to have you, if I wasn't so…hung up on Tomoya.”

He smiles, “Thank you.” He pauses for a moment with a furrowed brow. “Does that mean…you think you might feel the same some day?”

I wring my hands, “I…I don’t know. I can't make any promises. S-so…don’t wait around for me. Please. I want you to be with a girl who feels the same way you feel about her.”

He nods, “Okay.” There's an awkward silence for a moment. “Well…I think I'll go. See you in class?”

I nod and do my best to smile at him, and he leaves. When he does, I sigh and sit down on my bed. Not long after he left, there's another knock on my door. I know who it is. This was the plan.

“Come in.”

Chiyo and Akane come in and sit down on either side of me.

Akane puts an arm around me, and I rest my head on her shoulder.

“Did it go as crappy as you look?”

I sit up and frown at her, “Do I look that bad?”

Chiyo laughs, “She just means you look…devastated. Almost like you're the one who got rejected.”

I shrug, “I didn't like hurting him. He doesn't deserve it.” I hug myself and look down as I start to get choked up again, “H-he's a wonderful person who deserves to be with the girl he loves...”

Akane says, “If you really think that, are you sure you shouldn't have given him a chance?”

I shake my head, “I'm too uncertain. My feelings are all confused. I-it would be like you and Mi-...” I stop myself, realizing what I almost let slip. Chiyo knows she likes girls, but not her dating history.

“You can say her name, Nagisa. Chiyo won't tell anyone.”

I look at Chiyo, who nods. Then I turn back to Akane, “Misha really hurt you, by giving you a chance when she was in love with someone else, didn't she?”

Akane sighs, “Yeah, she did. You’re right. If he's with you and then you break it off, it's worse than rejecting him now.”

“Yeah…that's why I can't do it. I feel bad for hurting him now. But it would be worse if I was just using him to get over Tomoya.”

Chiyo frowns, “That does sound worse. Sorry you had to deal with that, Akane.”

She shrugs and pats me on the head with a goofy smile on her face, “I made it through thanks to Nagisa.”

After her hand lingers a little too long, I push it away, and Akane gives me a silly pout in response.

I turn to Chiyo, “Anyway…now that that's over, we should talk about you.”

She gets a look of panic, “M-me?”

“Yeah, you and Ken.”

Akane nods, “I thought he was your boyfriend for a long time. I was surprised when Nagisa told me he wasn't. What's the deal there?”

Chiyo shoots a glare at Akane and clenches her jaw.

Akane looks away, “S-sorry. It's none of my business. I-if…you want to talk to Nagisa alone, I can go.”

I look at Chiyo and do my best to calm her down with a smile.

Chiyo sighs and her jaw relaxes, “We can…maybe talk about it some time. But I'm not ready to confide in you just yet.”

Akane nods with a frown on her face, “Y-yeah…understandable. I'll go.”

Chiyo shakes her head, “You don't have to. I don't want to talk about it right now.” She dumps some nail polish out of her bag, “It's a boy-free kind of night, I think. So, no talking about boys again until tomorrow.”

Akane playfully clears her throat and looks around at Chiyo expectantly.

Chiyo looks confused and annoyed for a moment and then her eyes get wide, “Shit. S-sorry. Um…Romance free zone? Does that work?”

Akane laughs as she gets out an impressive array of sweets from The Shanghai and spreads them out on my desk, “That works. It’s not really a big deal. I mostly just wanted to get you flustered.”

Chiyo smiles, “I'll do your nails first, as recompense.”

Chiyo and Akane sit down on the floor opposite one another while I start munching on a dorayaki that Akane brought. Akane picks out a royal purple color. That definitely suits her.

Just before she gets started, Chiyo says, “Wow…your nails are really short. They didn't used to be. Do you bite them now or something?”

Akane laughs awkwardly, “Um…no.”

“Just like them really short these days, then?”

“Yes. Yes I do.”

Chiyo raises an eyebrow, “That's all you'll say? That's weird. You’re being weird.”

Akane sighs, “Fine. But when it gets awkward, remember you asked for it. It's a lesbian thing.”

Chiyo says, “Huh!? How is it a lesbian thing? Why would lesbians need shorter nai-” She stops for a second and then says, “Ohhhhhhh.”

Akane laughs, “Now you get it. It's actually one of the sneaky ways to scope out if a girl is gay. There's not a 100% chance she's gay if she has short nails, but it's definitely more likely.”

Chiyo starts painting Akane's nails, “That's kind of sad though, not being able to really glam up your nails. It would be hard for me.”

Akane shrugs, “It's worth the trade off.”

Chiyo laughs, “You know, I can see how it would be.”

I pick up another dorayaki and munch on it with a smile on my face as I watch my two friends.

It was hard turning down Daiki. I know I hurt him and it's hard for me to feel good about that.

But it helps a lot having these two as friends.

It's nice seeing the two of them talk so naturally. I think having someone else that Akane can be her real self with is really good for her.

Even if I don't understand why her nails are so short. Or what it has to do with being a lesbian. Maybe I'll ask her later.

Drama club is very loud today.

We finished planning out the set design yesterday, and today we have started construction. We cleared out a long section of the room and have set up a little workshop.

The set mostly consists of the little house where Chiyo’s character lives. Almost every scene takes place there. So it was important for us to make sure that part of the set looks great. Daiki decided he wanted to build three wooden walls of the house, with a window looking out into Hiroshima. Right now he, Ken, and Chiyo are making the window.

Daiki is using some sort of tool to make sure angles are straight and using a saw to cut wood.

Chiyo is mostly there to help Ken. She’s handing him tools and guiding his hand to the spot where Daiki left a mark for a nail. Once she does that, he’s very good at hammering the right place over and over.

I tried to help but they shooed me away and told me to work on rewriting the last couple of lines for my character that I haven't figured out yet. I feel a little bit left out, but it's true that I need to finish. But, I think they are also worried that if I push myself too much I'll get sick.

So far they have liked all the changes I made to my lines, with little criticism. It has been challenging to do, because the ghost of the father in the play says many things that would not make sense coming from a mother. And I also need to make sure what she is saying now is in the same tone and spirit as the original line. Some of Chiyo’s lines need to be changed too, since she’s now talking to her mother instead of her father. It's hard, but I’ve also found that I really enjoy doing it.

For example, right now I’m struggling to find a way to rewrite the following conversation:

CHIYO’S CHARACTER: ...you would lure as many women as you could with cigarettes and rice and take them to some hot springs resort and that's when Nobu took those secret photos of them that he showed to those officers and then you...

MY CHARACTER: (interrupting) That very same Nobu now sells little jellies that he gets from God knows where.

CHIYO’S CHARACTER: I know.

MY CHARACTER: Such talent as a photographer and he wastes it peddling black-market jellies!

CHIYO’S CHARACTER: Serves him right for taking nude pictures in the hot springs!

It doesn't help that I laugh every time I read it. It sounds like a conversation I would have with my dad. But that's kind of the problem.

Maybe the mother could be complain-

BANG BANG BANG

It’s loud enough that I’m having a hard time concentrating. Just as I’m thinking about telling my clubmates I’ll go work in the library, I see a frustrated Chiyo coming my way.

“What’s wrong?”

She sighs, “Ken wants you and me to go to art club to see about getting a poster made.”

“Oh. That's a good idea. Why are you angry about that?”

She sighs, “I dunno. Felt more like he was trying to get rid of me. Both of us, actually.”

“Maybe he wants some boy time with Daiki?”

“Yeah. Maybe.” She thinks for a minute, “Actually, you're probably right. He mentioned something the other day about wanting to talk to Daiki about how he's doing.”

“Oh, no. Is his knee bothering him?”

Chiyo laughs, “No, silly. About…the thing with you.”

Since the day I had to reject him, Daiki and I act like we always have. I still feel bad for doing it, but I was relieved to see he didn't seem upset. But, maybe he is and I didn’t notice.

Chiyo prods my cheek, “Stop frowning. He's doing okay, I think. But it is good for him to talk about it with someone. I'm not sure he has. He's not exactly a social butterfly, you know?”

“R-really? He seems social to me.”

“I guess he isn’t the obviously socially awkward type, huh?” She chuckles, “Well, apart from the cat thing.”

I frown, “I like the cat thing.”

Chiyo rolls her eyes, “I know, me too. I'm just trying to say…he doesn't really spend time with people outside of class and clubs. I think we’re his only friends. And maybe Akane? Helping take care of you was the most I’ve ever seen him outside of a ‘school’ setting. We used to invite him to stuff and he always said no, so we gave up.”

I frown, “I d-didn’t know.”

Chiyo sighs, “Don't feel bad about it. Some people like keeping to themselves…I'm just trying to say, I think Ken wants to check on him. So I shouldn't be so frustrated.”

I nod, and then stand up. “Okay…let's go to art club.”

When we’re about halfway to the school building, I realize something.

“Do we have any idea what we want to do for the poster?”

Chiyo nods, “Daiki and I came up with a design.”

“What kind of art do we need?”

“Hmm…someone who can do realistic-looking people, I guess? A portrait. No abstract stuff.”

…

When we get to the art clubroom, there's no teacher in sight and only a handful of students. They are all working and don't even look up at us.

The student closest to the door is a girl with short red hair, but that's not the first thing I notice about her. The first thing I see is that she's painting with her feet.

She's holding a paintbrush and using it with more skill than I ever could with my hands. She’s using vibrant reds and oranges, but I can't really make out what her painting is supposed to be.

I find myself captivated by her movements. I only stop watching when Chiyo pokes me in the arm.

I look up at her and she mouths, “Stop staring!”

Only now do I notice that this girl doesn't have arms. Her shirt sleeves are tied into knots. I was so amazed by how well she could paint with her feet I hadn't stopped to think why she uses her feet. I can see why staring is bad.

Chiyo steps forward and says, “E-excuse me. Do you know where the art teacher is?”

Without looking up from her canvas the girl says, “Yes.”

After it becomes clear she's not going to continue, I chime in, “Can you tell us?”

“Somewhere.”

Chiyo replies, “...where is that, exactly?”

“Not here. That's what makes it somewhere.”

“Okay, but uh…what exact place might I find him?”

The girl tilts her head to the side and thinks for a moment, “Japan.”

Chiyo sighs in frustration, “That's…not an exact place.”

“Seems exact. We’re in Japan, right? It's exactly where we are.”

Seeing Chiyo’s growing frustration I step in, “I-is he on campus?”

“Dunno. Have thoughts I need to paint.”

“O-okay. Sorry for disturbing you. Thank you.”

We step back in the hall where Chiyo says, “Well…I guess we can just try talking to students. I thought he might point us in the right direction. We aren't talking to her again, though.”

I nod and we go back into the art room and survey things a little.

Chiyo nudges me and whispers, “What about her? Her work looks like what we want.”

Chiyo nods towards a girl and I'm surprised to see a familiar face. She seems to be painting a portrait. It looks like a red haired girl with green eyes and twin tails. She seems to be using a photograph of the girl as reference. It's one of the two of them together at the beach. She must be her friend.

Why is she here, though?

“S-Saki?”

She curtly says, “Just a second.”

I think I learned today that artists really don't like to be interrupted.

She puts down her paintbrush and turns to me with an annoyed face that quickly dissipates, “What is i-? Oh, Nagisa! What are you doing here?”

I laugh, “I was going to ask the same thing. Aren't you in band?”

She laughs, “I am. But art club too.”

“Wow…you must work very hard.”

She sighs, “Yeah. Too hard.” She sighs, “Our adviser is making us all submit work to a little art show in town next weekend, but he only sprung it on us today.”

That explains the mood in here.

Chiyo pointedly clears her throat, making me realize I haven't introduced them.

After introducing the two of them and explaining that Chiyo is in drama club with me, I say, “We wanted to make a poster for our play. And we thought maybe we could commission someone here to do it.”

Chiyo adds, “We don't have much of a budget…but we can pay a little. We need it in like a week.”

Saki nods, “Well…I don't know if any of us will have time. What are you looking for, exactly?”

I look to Chiyo whose smile looks more than a little mischievous, “Nagisa in her costume, but like…turning kind of transparent, since she'll be playing a ghost.”

I turn towards Saki with raised eyebrows, “Wh-what!?”

My surprise makes Saki laugh and Chiyo joins her.

“Shouldn't it be you? Y-you look like a model!”

Saki smirks at Chiyo and looks her up and down, “I mean…she's not wrong. I hadn't met you before, but everyone knows who you are. The guys who don't know your name call you ‘That really hot third year.”

Chiyo blushes and then shakes her head and looks at me, “The play is called Living With Mother, and you're playing the ghost mom. Makes way more sense for you to be on it.”

Saki nods, “She’s right, given what the play is called and who you are playing, it has to be you.” Saki pauses for a moment and taps her finger on her chin, “This is probably going to go the best for you if you use a photograph and then have someone edit in the transparent stuff and the title of the play. I think that would look best.”

Chiyo nods, “That sounds good, but who can do that?”

Saki says, “Well…we have cameras here and we did some photography last year, so I could take the pictures. It should just take like 30 minutes, so I have the time.” She grins at me, “We can have a little photo shoot. Sounds kinda fun actually.”

“O-okay. But what about the computer part?”

“You might try newspaper club. They probably have the software and the know-how.”

After setting up a time and place for Saki to take photos of me (this Sunday evening), we head down to the first floor of the school building to see if the newspaper club is in session.

…

We are in the school newspaper's club room, but it appears to be empty. It's an empty room with a few computers. A stack of this week's paper is on one of the tables.

There are two offices off to the side, though. I check one while Akane checks the other. It seems I've found yet another computer and an empty room. The lights are even turned off.

I flip the light switch and hear, “Mmn…trying to nap…turn off.”

My eyes open wide and I'm scared for a moment, and then I see there's a boy hunched over the keyboard and laying his head on the desk. Just as I'm about to turn the light off and leave, he opens his eyes and sleepily says, “N-nagisa?”

Now I see that this sleepy boy has a familiar face.

“Ichiro? You're in newspaper club!?”

He sits up and rubs his eyes, “Yeah. Akane have you thinking I’m a lazy good-for-nothing?”

“U-um…”

He laughs, “I only joined this year, to be fair. Realized I’d need to if I want to go to university.” He gives me a welcoming gesture and says, “Come in, come in - you don’t have to stand on the threshold.”

I nod and approach him. When I’m close enough he takes my hand and bows his head towards it, “To what do I owe the pleasure, fair Nagisa?”

I feel my cheeks flush, “U-um…”

Chiyo steps into the room saying, “Is someone actually in here?” Then she sees me and Ichiro and steps towards us and forcibly separates our hands, “Don't let this creep touch you, Nagisa. He’s the worst.”

Whoa, she sounds like Akane. I guess they hated him together their first year.

He grabs Chiyo's hand now and grins, “Ah, ‘tis the fairest maiden of them all.”

Just as his lips start to move towards her hand she rips it away, “Shut up, Ichiro. And don't touch me.” Then she huffs and says, “God, you’re still this much of a creep?! I haven’t missed this.”

Ichiro's shoulders slump, “I was just messing around. I'm not a creep anymore. Tell her, Nagisa!”

“U-um…he's not a creep. H-he's really nice.”

“See?”

She scoffs, “Like I can believe her. She doesn't say bad things about anyone. Even when they deserve it.”

He sighs, “Fine. I’m still a creep. But less of one, okay!”

“That I can believe. Anyway, are you the only one here?”

“That's right. We just finished the week's paper and everyone went out to celebrate but I was too tired.” He yawns and then smiles, “So…just the three of us. Whatever will we get up to?” He winks at me playfully.

“If you do something creepy one more time…I swear…I'm gonna…”

Chiyo trails off so I say, “W-we'll bring Akane in here to scold you!”

He sighs, “Damn. Bringing out the big guns, huh? Fine, fine. I'll behave.”

Now he puts on an over the top professional voice, “How might I be of service to you two young ladies today?”

Chiyo rolls her eyes and says, “We are making the poster for our play. We need someone who can do…computer photo editing…stuff. Is there someone like that in the club?”

He gestures for us to walk around him and look at his computer screen. There’s an article about a recent track meet on the screen, titled “IBARAZAKI SHATTERS SEVERAL PREFECTURE RECORDS.” Beneath it, there's a photo of a smiling girl in twin tails throwing her arms up at the finish line. There are several medals hanging around her neck. One says, “Women’s 100m,” and the rest list her other records.

Chiyo says, “You did this? You added all those medals and text? They look so real. Not sure I buy it.”

He sighs and clicks on something, and the photo without the medals appears on the screen.

“Believe me now? I make all the graphics in the paper. Even some of the ads.”

Chiyo goes back to the main club room and brings a paper back with her. She starts flipping through it.

Chiyo sighs, “I hate to admit it but…you’re good.”

“Thanks. I've been doing it awhile. Taught myself Photoshop when I was 13 so I could make pictures of hot celebrities in the n-...” He clears his throat, “...in the natural world.”

Chiyo rolls her eyes, “Nice save creep.”

I ask, “W-would you be able to make a person look transparent and ghostly?”

“Yeah, I could swing that, I think.”

Chiyo looks at me with concern, “Are you really sure you want this guy to have your picture? Sometimes these things go over your head. So I want to make sure - you know what he was about to say a minute ago, right?”

I nod, “Y-yes…he's like the father in the original version of our play.”

Chiyo laughs, “Pretty much. The modern version of that.”

“B-but…he won't do that with my picture. I know he won't.”

Chiyo shakes her head, “Look at the blind trust this pure maiden has in you, Ichiro. That alone should set you straight. But if you betray that trust…I think I know at least two people who would kill you. Both of them are in your class and know where you live.”

Ichiro frowns, “I would never do that, okay! I did that when I was a kid. And never with girls I knew. Promise!”

Chiyo smiles, “Good boy. Well…we’ll bring you a photo on Monday that we’ll need your help with. We can pay a little.”

He waves his hand, “I’ll do it for free. To make up for being a creep.”

“Well…I’m not sure that can ever be made up for, but it's a start.”

Author Notes:

I probably should have mentioned this several chapters ago when Nagisa and the drama club chose the play they would perform. Living With Father is a real play! In Japanese it’s called 父と暮せば, (Chichi to Kuraseba), which literally means, “Living With Father". It was written by Hisashi Inoue in 2001. In the west it’s often known as “The Face of Jizo,” but I liked the literal translation of the name more for this particular story. The lines that have appeared in the fic so far are from Robert Pulvers’s English translation. It’s a really great play that I recommend you read, especially if you’re interested in Japanese depictions of World War II. There’s also a film version that is also called The Face of Jizo in the west. More of the play will be appearing later in the fic, so don’t read/watch if you don’t want some spoilers!

Oh! So you post chapters here a day early! This is very useful information +v+

For the nitpicky part of my comment, "Choyo" speaks when I think Akane is supposed to and Ichiro grabs Akane's hand in a scene where Akane isn't around.

As for everything else, that was lovely as usual. Think it'd be funny if the father character was rewritten into a somewhat problematic lesbian. Nagisa would get flustered at first, but I think she could do it. (Assume you already have a plan in mind though.)

MagicalMelancholy wrote: ↑Sun Aug 18, 2024 10:18 am

Oh! So you post chapters here a day early! This is very useful information +v+

For the nitpicky part of my comment, "Choyo" speaks when I think Akane is supposed to and Ichiro grabs Akane's hand in a scene where Akane isn't around.

As for everything else, that was lovely as usual. Think it'd be funny if the father character was rewritten into a somewhat problematic lesbian. Nagisa would get flustered at first, but I think she could do it. (Assume you already have a plan in mind though.)

Yeesh, apparently I had a hard time with keeping names straight in that chapter. Those errors are fixed now, thanks!

“Alright, we’ve got a deadline now so we better finish your costume.”

Chiyo and I are in the club room on a Wednesday afternoon. So far we’ve kind of put off my costume because it's the hardest. But now we need it in a few days for the photo shoot for the flier. We have two halves of a checkered purple and cream kimono on the sewing table and we’re trying to decide the next step.

I nod, “Are you still thinking we’ll be able to finish the monpe? Wouldn’t it be easier to go with one of the other kimonos?

Chiyo shakes her head, “There’s no way this woman would have been wearing a nice kimono or dress in 1945, though. You’re the one who told me that, remember?”

I nod, “Times were hard a-and the government wanted women to reuse old clothing. But maybe she just kept her old clothes in really good shape?”

We found lots of kimonos and other traditional clothing in the clubroom, but no monpe made from kimono.

Chiyo sighs and looks down at the checkered purple and cream fabric, “That will be Plan B, I guess. If we don't pull it off. But I think I can do this. It doesn’t even need to look perfect. It is actually more realistic if it looks a little sloppy.”

I learned in my research that a monpe were pants that women who worked on farms wore well before the war. But during the war, women were expected to make an entire outfit from their old kimonos, including monpe and a jacket-like top.

It’s most likely what my character would have worn. But, Chiyo’s right that it doesn’t need to be perfect. Poor women usually made their own, and even back then it isn’t like every woman was an expert seamstress.

“Have you tried the top on, yet?”

I shake my head and put it on over my uniform. It’s basically like the top part of the kimono, with the bottom chopped off. This part wasn’t too difficult.

Chiyo looks at me and nods, “That looks pretty good, at least. We probably don't need to fuss with it too much.”

Chiyo is looking at the women’s fashion book I got from the library. She’s looking back and forth between the image of a woman wearing a monpe and the half of a kimono in her hands.

“Somehow…I have to make pants out of this.” She laughs softly, “It’s too bad there isn’t an instruction manual.”

“A-actually…the book says that in women’s magazines at the time, there were instructions for how to make them.”

Chiyo looks at me with a smirk, “Yeah? Have any women’s magazines from the 1940s?”

I bow my head, “No.”

The door to the club room opens and closes, and I turn, expecting to see Ken or Daiki, but I’m surprised to see Mr. Suzuki instead. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen him around anything club-related, even though he is our adviser.

He smiles at us, “Hello ladies. I thought I would check in as the date approaches.” He sees what we’re doing and says, “Ah, working hard on costuming, I see. Carry on, I’m just observing. Pretend I’m not here.”

We both greet him, and then he begins to hover around us. He looks at me, still wearing the top of the monpe, then at the fabric on the table, then at the book that we have open next to it. It's pretty hard to continue to work normally with him watching.

He smiles and looks a little misty-eyed as he looks at the photograph in the book, “In my earliest memories, that’s what my mother was wearing. I had forgotten that.”

Chiyo says, “R-really? She wore monpe made from kimono scraps?”

He nods, “I was born in 1941, so I remember a little of the war. Unfortunately, I don’t have any advice on how to make them. I was just a little boy, and my mother has long since passed away.” He laughs, “Even if she were still alive, I don’t think she would have wanted to help you. I remember her happily throwing them away when my father got her new clothes after the war. She didn’t think they were very flattering.”

I laugh with him, “That’s a really nice memory.”

He nods, “It is. Thank you two for helping me remember it.”

“S-sir…do you know if the library has women’s magazines from the time of the war?”

He smiles at me, “Ah, good thinking.” He strokes his beard for a moment while he furrows his brow, “I doubt they have any of the original magazines here…but they might have some microfilm. Would you like me to go look for you?”

“O-oh…you don’t have to do that, sir. We can go and do it.”

He shakes his head, “I’d be happy to. I’m feeling nostalgic now. It will be nice to go and look for the magazines my mother used to read. I also happen to know how to view microfilm. Do either of you?”

Chiyo laughs, “I don't even know what microfilm is.”

She looks at me and I say, “Me neither.”

“Okay. I’ll go do that. And I’ll have any information about monpe printed out and bring them back to you.”

Chiyo and I exchange a look, and I know we’re both thinking – Is he going to wander off and forget about us?

Still, in the end I say, “Th-that would be really helpful sir, thank you.”

After he leaves, I help Chiyo put the finishing touches on her own outfit for the play, a plain blue western-style dress that women were wearing in the post-war period. Luckily this is a much easier task. We had plenty of dresses that would have worked in the club room. The only thing left to do is bring out the bust a little more for her, because right now the dress is a little too tight.

However, once we finish with that task in a few hours, we start to worry that Mr. Suzuki hasn't returned.

Chiyo says, “I guess…we can go and look for ourselves tomorrow. Was probably a mistake to think that he would be reliable.”

I nod, and we start to get things ready to lock up the club room. But just as I'm about to turn off the light, Mr. Suzuki comes through the door.

He smiles, “Hello again, ladies. Sorry I was gone so long. I got a little distracted reading some of those old articles. It was quite fascinating. There was even some old poetry that I found quite-”

He notices that Chiyo and I are staring at him anxiously, causing him to chuckle, “Oh. Silly me. I should have led with the good news. I found what you were looking for. There were actually quite a few different articles about making monpe from kimono, but this one has step-by-step photos, so I think it will be most helpful.”

He hands Chiyo a few of pieces of paper and she quickly flips through them. As she does, her smile gets wider and wider.

“I-I can do this! Thank you, Mr. Suzuki!”

He smiles, “It's no problem. I am the adviser after all. About time I contributed something, isn't it?”

I laugh, “Thank you sir.”

He smiles, “I must commend you both for going to such lengths for accurate costuming. You two do good research.”

Chiyo puts the papers down and claps me on the back, “Nagisa did the research. And yeah, she did a great job. I had never even heard of monpe.”

He smiles at me, “I look forward to seeing the finished product. Have a good evening, you two.”

He sees himself out as Chiyo pores over the microfilm printouts some more, “I can do it. But this is going to be tough, and might take multiple tries. I think we’ll need Saturday afternoon and all day Sunday until the shoot. Are you free? I could use the help.”

“O-of course!”

I want to say something about how beautiful it is that we are working so hard towards a common goal, but I know I'd get laughed at.

Saki puts the camera up to her face and points it at me while she looks through the viewfinder, “Alright, I think I have all the settings where they need to be. Are you ready?”

“U-um…I think so.”

It's time for the photoshoot with Saki. I'm wearing sandals, a purple monpe and a head scarf over my hair.

Chiyo and I only finished the monpe pants about two hours ago. We (mostly she) figured it out on the second try, but that also means we had to use two different kimonos. So my top has a checkered purple and cream pattern, while the bottom is a solid purple. But they match well enough. Luckily, we found out that monpe weren't always matching. Women just had to work with what they had on hand, after all.

Ken and Daiki also finished making the back wall and the window for the set. We moved it to the stage so there would be good lighting for the pictures. I'm standing in front of the window, unsure how I should pose.

Akane rolls her eyes, “You look like the prettiest little World War II wife ever. Stop being so bashful.”

Both Akane and Chiyo are here too. They are standing on either side of Saki. Chiyo makes sense because she knows how she wants the flier to look. I think Akane is mostly just here to tease me. She did bring snacks for later, though.

I feel kind of alone on my side of the stage, with the three of them examining me.

Chiyo nods, “It's true. You look great.”

Saki nods, “Agreed. So…let’s do a few of you standing by the window inside the house. And then I think it might be neat to do a few where I’m taking pictures from the outside and you’re in the window. Sound good?”

Chiyo nods, “Works for me.”

“U-um…how should I stand?”

Saki looks to Chiyo who says, “Well…we should do our best to capture your character’s essence. How do you think she would have stood?”

I think about it for a moment, “M-maybe…like this. It’s how I stand for most of the play.” I move so my shoulders are square with the camera and fold my hands across my lower abdomen.

Chiyo nods, “That works. What about her face? What’s her emotional through-line in the play?”

“Um…she's v-very worried about her depressed daughter who she loves very much. But also very hopeful that she has found love. And that it will help her heal.”

Chiyo smiles, “I've seen that face in rehearsal. Should we do a few lines to get you in character?”

I look at Akane and Saki and feel a little nervous. But that's silly. They are my friends. And before long I'll have to do this in front of strangers.

I nod, “Um…okay.”

“How about the anpan conversation?”

I nod.

“Okay, let’s start.”

I look at Chiyo sternly and wag my finger at her as I say, “Ya know, he wouldn't give ya an anpan if he hadn't taken a shine to you.”

Chiyo sighs and shakes her head, “You see too much in a pastry, mother.”

I laugh wryly, “Even a pastry can carry a lotta weight.” I point at her and narrow my eyes, "It's you who should have the courage ta look into it a bit more deeply.”

Chiyo looks away from me and frustratedly sighs, “Mr. Kinoshita gave it to me to thank me, mother, that's all.”

I scoff at her, “There's another hidden meanin’ in that anpan, I'm convinced of it. Call it a mother’s intuition.”

Chiyo stomps her foot and with a loud, shaky voice says, “WILL YOU PLEASE STOP BRINGING UP THE ANPAN!?”

I'm quiet for a moment, looking on in shock at how upset she is about this. I soften my voice and give her a small smile, “Look, sweetie. This thing is crucial for you and I'm not goin’ to rest until I get to the bottom of that anpan.”

Chiyo smiles and in her normal voice says, “There, that's it! Hold that face!”

I do as I'm instructed, but to my surprise Saki isn't immediately ready. She laughs, “S-sorry! I got caught up in all that.”

Akane laughs, “Me too. I kind of forgot we were even taking pictures.”

…

We just finished the photoshoot. Saki thinks she got some good ones for Chiyo to choose from. I feel very relieved. Between working on the monpe and the photoshoot, it has been a tense weekend. But now I feel like I can rest.

The four of us are sitting on the edge of the stage now chatting and eating some snacks Akane brought.

Saki says, “Thank God you brought some anpan. I really wanted one after that little showcase.” She smiles at Akane, "The on-theme catering is impressive.”

Akane laughs, “I actually didn't know about anpan being in the play. But I did know Nagisa loves them.”

I nod as I much on one of them, “I-it’s true.”

We all laugh about the coincidence.

Not long after, Saki sighs and stands up after finishing her anpan. In a very dejected voice she says, “I guess I need to get back to painting. But before I do…” She looks at me and runs her hand on my sleeve, “Where did you get this kind of outfit? I’ve never seen anything like it. I want it. Or well…one my size, anyway. Don't think yours will fit. Where did you even get it?”

Chiyo responds, “We made it from two old kimonos. It's what lots of women wore back then.”

Saki looks at Chiyo with eyes that are practically sparkling, “You have…vintage clothes in your club room?! And you know how to do alterations!?” She pauses for a moment and taps a finger on her chin, “Hmm…can I be in three clubs?”

Chiyo laughs, “I thought you might be into fashion with the outfits I've seen you in. And you always have on cute bracelets.”

Saki nods and thumps her cane on the ground, “I even accessorize with my cane.” She holds out a yellow flowery bracelet that is connected to her cane and looped around her wrist.

“Well, we have nothing but vintage clothes and old costumes in there from the old days of the drama club. So, we were able to find enough period clothes for three people. Took some digging, though.”

“Well jeez, now I want to do some digging.”

Chiyo laughs, “Hmm…our club probably won't exist next year. If it doesn't, I'll make sure I leave you the key so you can do a little shopping. It's the least I can do for your help with this.”

What?!

Saki's face lights up, “That would be cool. Alright, I've gotta go. I'll get you the pictures later tonight. Email works?”

Chiyo gives Saki her email address and then we say our goodbyes to her.

Once the three of us are sitting down again, Akane pokes my cheek, “Why do you look all sad all of a sudden?”

I look at Chiyo and say, “There…won't be a drama club next year?”

I must have sounded upset, because the playful mood from earlier is suddenly gone.

Akane says, “Well…you're all third years, right?”

Chiyo nods, “Right now the whole club graduates in the Spring, Nagisa. I'm sorry…I shouldn't have brought it up right now.” She smiles softly, "I'm…glad you like the club so much that you're upset it won't be here though.”

I frown, “I…hadn't really thought of next year yet. I think it would be so sad if there isn't drama club next year. What if someone wants to join and finds that it's gone?”

Akane puts an arm over my shoulders and says, “That's what happened to you at your old school, huh?”

I nod, “I w-was so excited to join and…then there wasn't a club. I don't want that to happen to someone else.”

Chiyo nods, “Well…we will see what we can do after the play. Maybe we'll find people who want to continue it.”

“I hope so…maybe the play will get people interested.”

Chiyo smiles, “Yeah, maybe.”

Akane chimes in, “If you two perform then like you did tonight and I think you'll have a whole lot of people interested.”

“Now then…if I remember correctly, you wanted me to make her clothes transparen-Ow!.”

“Y-you didn't have to hit him, Chiyo.”

Akane and I are in the graphic design room for the school newspaper. Ichiro just opened the photograph of me that we emailed to him. I’m wearing my costume and look very motherly. In fact, I've seen the look on my own mother's face many times before. Especially any time we went to the doctor, hoping for answers about my condition. That's probably where I got it from.

Chiyo scoffs, “I just flicked the back of his head. And he should be lucky to get off so easily. If I were Akane he probably wouldn't have a head left.”

He sighs while rubbing the back of his head, “Yeah, yeah. I knew the risks and I still made the joke. Anyway…give me like 30 minutes.”

“R-really? That's all it will take?”

“I think so. I just have to isolate you from the background, lower the opacity, and then put you back in. Might also add an outer glow to make it a little more…spectral.”

Chiyo and I exchange a look as if to say - Did you understand any of that? I can see that neither of us do.

He laughs at us, “I can add in the play's title and stuff too, if you leave it all with me.”

Chiyo writes everything down for Ichiro. Then the two of us head to the cafeteria for a snack while we wait for Ichiro to do his work.

…

We just finished our snacks, and I find I’m curious about something.

“Do you really think Akane would kill him for joking about my clothes being see-through?”

Chiyo grins, “Probably. She…really cares about you.”

“You care about me too. And you only flicked him.”

She laughs, “Did you want me to kill him?”

“N-no! Of course not. I think flicking him was too much.”

“Then…what are you saying?”

“I'm saying….why do you think her reaction would be different?”

“U-um….I don't know for sure…but I think maybe…she cares about you a little differently than I do.”

“What do you mean?”

Chiyo fidgets with one of her braids and then strings words together so quickly I have a hard time keeping up, “I dunno. She just has a temper, you know? A-and you two are closer than we are. I dunno. I'm far from an expert on her these days. I don't really know what I'm talking about. I was mostly just trying to scare Ichiro.” She looks at the time, “W-we need to go back.”

“It's only been 15 minutes.”

“Yeah, well…we need to make sure Ichiro is doing his job! You know how he is.”

I'm at a little shop at the bottom of the hill. It’s across from The Shanghai. It mostly looks like an antique shop. I suppose that's the most fitting place for an art showcase in this little town.

There are several Yamaku students milling about, as well as several older people. There isn't really an in between. I think I heard that the people who live in this town are on the older side. That's certainly how it looks every time I come down here.

Eventually, I find the student I’m looking for.

“Nagisa? What are you doing here?”

I smile, “Hi Saki. I wanted to come see your painting.”

She smiles, “Aw. You’re the sweetest.”

“Well…you took photos for the drama club and wouldn't let us pay you, so…you might be sweeter.”

She laughs, “I don't think that's possible. If I were any sweeter than you, I’d have diabetes.”

“SERIOUSLY?!”

I’m startled by the very loud outburst of a girl nearby, who is now approaching us.

That's a voice that could rival Misha.

She’s about as tall as Saki, with brown eyes and short dark brown hair in a bob kind of like mine.

Saki laughs and smiles at the girl, “Sorry. I couldn't help making the joke with you in earshot.”

She crosses her arms and grumbles, “Come to see your art and what do I get in return? My medical condition mocked.”

I frown at Saki, “Th-that wasn’t very nice of you.”

Chisato looks at me, “Trust me, Nagisa. She’s not as sweet as you. Miso soup is sweeter than she is.”

Saki laughs, “Nagisa, this is my best friend, Chisato.”

She scoffs, “Former best friend.” She walks over to me and loops arms with me, “I think Nagisa's my best friend now. My blood sugar is low from being around you too much. I could use the sweetness.”

I laugh while Saki sighs and asks, “Are you really upset with me?”

“A little, yeah. You don't hear me making jokes about your condition, do you?”

Saki frowns, “You're right. I was just being silly and wasn't thinking. I'm sorry.”

Chisato unloops her arm with mine and gives Saki a steen look, “It's alright. I forgive you.” The next instant she looks around excitedly with a smile on her face, “Now…I think Nagisa and I are both here to see a painting!”

Her level of energy rivals Misha too.

Saki laughs and guides us to the painting. It's the one I saw her working on in the art room. It’s a beautiful brown-eyed girl with red hair in twintails.

Chisato says, “Sh-she looks….so good, Saki.” She half-laughs half-sniffles, “She would be embarrassed you painted her.”

Saki laughs, “Yeah. I thought the same thing. I thought about painting her to look embarrassed but then I thought she’d hate me if I did.”

As the two of them talk more about the girl in the painting, I approach it to look at it more closely. Then I look at the little card on the wall next to it. The title is just a name - “Kayoko.”

“You painted her in her favorite outfit too – the one she got during our first shopping trip in the city together. Th-that’s…a nice touch.”

Saki laughs, “She never liked shopping quite as much as you or I though, did she? She was always more pumped about where we’d eat.”

Chisato laughs, “You should have painted her scarfing down a bowl of ramen.”

As I continue to listen to Saki and Chisato talk about her, I realize they are only using past tense. And while they are both composed, they are both also very emotional.

I think back to when I saw Saki using a photograph of the two of them together as reference when she was painting. Saki looked pretty much the age she does now in the same photo.

I put that all together and come to a sad conclusion.

Kayoko passed away. And recently. It sounds like it used to be the three of them all the time. It would be like…if Akane or Chiyo passed away.

I hadn't really thought about the fact that some students at Yamaku, some of my classmates, have conditions that could shorten their lives. That’s…

“-nk, Nagisa?”

Oh, I think Saki’s talking to me.

“Huh?”

Saki raises an eyebrow, “I said…sorry, we've been leaving you out. What do you think of the painting?”

“Oh…it's…she's…very beautiful.”

Saki smiles, “Thank you. It helps having a beautiful person to paint. The date of this little show just happened to be her first birthday since she…passed. So…I thought I’d make her a painting.”

I should let the three of them be alone. As alone as they can be in a public place, anyway. They will feel like I need to be included in the conversation otherwise and they shouldn't have to do that.

Plus if I stay here I’m probably going to cry. And I don't want to make this about me.

I reach into my bag and pull out a flier for the play, “Um…here. I wanted you to have this. To see how it turned out. We’re putting them all up tomorrow.”

Saki takes the flier and looks at it with a smile, “It looks great. I’m glad that all worked out. It helped having a pretty subject in this one too. I'm excited to see the play.”

“Thanks again for your help.” I look at the painting and then at each of them and say, “I’m…very sorry you lost her.”

Chisato nods, without looking away from the painting, “We are too.”

Saki adds with a soft smile, “Thanks for coming.”

AUTHOR NOTES:

It probably seems like I made up the whole scene about anpan in Living With Father. After all, it’s a food Nagisa is always eating in CLANNAD. But it is a real scene in the play! Nagisa rewrote some of the scene of course, but the elements of the conversation are the same. The young woman’s suitor really does give her an anpan, and while her father is convinced that it means he likes her, the young woman doesn’t agree. I knew I had to find a way to include it here after I read it.

Did you choose that play just for the anpan? Lol

I actually didn't! I had read it a long time ago but didn't remember that detail until I reread it while I was writing this. Maybe it was subconscious?

guthrum06 wrote: ↑Sun Aug 25, 2024 7:42 pm

I actually didn't! I had read it a long time ago but didn't remember that detail until I reread it while I was writing this. Maybe it was subconscious?

Or maybe it was destiny.

If not for anpan, why did you pick this play? (Perhaps it's a question that can be answered by just reading the play though.)

Also I forgot to comment on other stuff. The way you're writing these guys' steps towards preparing for the play is really engaging! And your Saki fanservice is always nice (especially now that I've actually read her fic).

I am left wondering how Nagisa and Daiki interact (or avoid interacting) when they see each other now though.

MagicalMelancholy wrote: ↑Sun Aug 25, 2024 7:50 pm

If not for anpan, why did you pick this play? (Perhaps it's a question that can be answered by just reading the play though.

I think once you see more of the play performed -- and some of the character's reactions to it -- you'll figure out why I chose it.

I've spent the afternoon putting fliers for the play up on campus. I just finished putting them up outside the auxiliary building, and I'm stopping to use the restroom before heading to the athletic fields.

Just as I'm about to leave my stall, I hear someone else enter the bathroom. She turns on the faucet and the hand dryer, confusing me at first. But then I hear the faint sound of her sniffling.

She's trying to make sure people outside don't hear her.

Should I just stay here and let her have her privacy? Or try to help?

Just as I'm thinking about this, I accidentally drop my bag.

“I-is…someone in there?”

I sigh and push open the door, “Y-yes.”

The girl I see by the sink looks very familiar but I can't place her. I'm also surprised to see that she's shorter than I am, not something I see very often. She has bright green eyes and light brown hair in twin tails. She looks younger than a high school student but she’s wearing a Yamaku athletic outfit, so I know she is one.

I also quickly notice that she has some kind of prosthetic on both her legs. But they don't look like legs like most of the ones I've seen on other students. They are curved and very thin.

She crosses her arms, “Normally this bathroom is deserted in the late afternoon. It's not very nice to hide in there when a girl is trying to have some privacy.”

“I-I'm sorry. I wasn't sure if I should come out or leave you alone.”

She sighs and turns off the faucet and air dryer, “It’s fine.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I'll be fine. Got in a fight with my boyfriend and…going to have to dump him. Kind of sucks.”

“O-oh…do you…want to talk about it?”

To my surprise, she snaps at me, "Talking won't solve anything. It isn’t something you can fix.”

Then she smiles broadly like it never happened. With exuberance she says, “I'll be just fine. I always am.”

Now that she's smiling, I know who she is.

“U-um…okay. Congratulations, by the way.”

She makes such a confused face I can almost see floating question marks around her.

“For…dumping my boyfriend?”

I laugh, “No. Your track records.”

“Ohhh. Uh, thanks. Do I…know you?”

I shake my head, “I just recognized you from the newspaper.”

“Oh, right. Hmmm…” She looks closely at me, “I've been thinking you look familiar this whole conversation. What's your name?”

“Nagisa. You're Ibarazaki, right?”

She nods, “Just Emi is good. So we've never met? Even though you look familiar?”

“Nope.” I pause for a moment, “Oh!” I reach into my bag and pull out a flier, “You might have seen this somewhere. My clubmates and I are putting them up today.”

She snaps her fingers and then takes the flier from me, “That's it.” She studies the flier, “You're a ghost and I met you in the bathroom.” She giggles, “I'll have to tell Rin I met a very different Hanako, today.”

“Huh?”

She waves her hand, “Nothing, just a stupid joke with a friend. Okay well…maybe I'll try to come to this.” She sloppily folds up the flier and bounds towards the door. I now see the prosthetics she’s wearing are very springy.

“Nice meeting you!”

You'd hardly know she was so upset a minute ago.

I'm in Akane's room. We're about to walk to class like we do every morning. She's putting on her shoes.

“Can I go to lunch with you today?”

Akane’s eyebrows shoot up, “Of course. Why, though? Feeling nostalgic? Or…did stuff with Daiki get awkward after all?”

I shake my head, “Things are good with him. I just wanted to invite your friends to the play in person. A-and it's been awhile since I’ve seen them.”

She nods as she stands up from putting her shoes on, “I was probably projecting a minute ago. Because stuff with my friends right now is awkward.”

“I-it is? Because of…unrequited love?”

She laughs, “Maybe that's a little bit of it. But…the main thing right now is…Lilly and Shizune got into a huge fight the other day.”

“Oh. About student council?”

Akane grins, “You only ate with us for like a week and a half and picked up on that little conflict, huh?”

I nod.

She sighs, “I shouldn’t be surprised. It’s been an ongoing thing with them. They've always bent without breaking in the past, though. Said sorry to each other and moved on. But now…Lilly quit the council. I don't know the details, but they are both very stubborn people. One of them finally pushed the other too far – probably Shizune, if I had to guess.” She shakes her head, “Anyway, Misha is trying to repair things and Shizune is mad that she’s trying to do that. She thinks they should just focus on the festival and forget about Lilly.”

“Wow. That’s…so sad. Shizune and Lilly are family. They should make up.”

We leave Akane’s room and start heading towards class, “I agree. And maybe they will? But I wouldn’t count on it any time soon.”

…

Akane warned me about this, but nothing could have prepared me for it. Things in the cafeteria are very different than they were at the start of the trimester.

First, there's Misha's new hairstyle. She has bubblegum pink hair that is styled into spirals that hang over her shoulders. I had seen a pink-haired girl on campus from a distance but I had no idea it was her.

But even more surprising than that is how quiet everything is. Shizune and Misha greeted me when I got here and we exchanged basic pleasantries. But since then no one has tried to say anything to anyone. In sign language or otherwise. We're all just sitting quietly and eating. There is one less girl here, but Lilly was hardly the source of most of the noise.

Every now and then Shizune looks up at Misha, but as soon as Misha tries to return her gaze, Shizune looks away.

Just as I'm thinking this might be a bad time to invite them to the play, Akane pokes me in the side and gestures toward them.

I guess she still thinks I should do it. And she knows them better than I do.

I get out two fliers from my bag and say, “U-um…I wanted to invite you both to the drama club's play.”

I slide the fliers over to them, and Shizune looks up while Misha signs to her. They both pick up their flier and Misha immediately grins. She puts it down and signs while she loudly says, “You're even on the flier. You're gonna be famous! Wahaha~!”

I laugh, “I don't know about that.”

Akane pats menon the back and then signs to Shizune when she says, “Yamaku famous, at least!”

Shizune signs something and Misha says, “Shicchan is glad you found a club and are participating in Yamaku school life so much. She was worried about you at the beginning of the trimester. Aw, you were Shicchan? I guess I missed her first few days.”

I nod, “I was having a hard time back then. But I have really enjoyed drama club and Yamaku too. I…don't think I would have gotten off to such a good start without you two. Thank you so much.”

Shizune smiles and starts signing and Akane laughs and rolls her eyes while Misha relays the message, “Shicchan says she was right about you. Your hard work in drama club proves you would have been a good addition to the student council. Your talents would have been very welcome.” Shizune's hands stop for a moment and then she resumes, “But she's very happy to see that you're doing so well. Adjusting can be hard.”

“Th-thank you, Shizune.”

She nods and smiles before signing again, “Shicchan says she wouldn't be a good student council president if she didn't go to the play. So we’ll be there.”

“I-I'm very happy to hear that.” I frown when I realize something, “Will it be…hard to follow?”

Shizune gives me a small nod and starts signing, while Misha says, “Shicchan says that me and Akane will keep her in the loop, but acting is about a lot more than words, isn't it?”

“I-it is. You're right. But…if I could get you the script, that would probably help, wouldn't it?”

Shizune nods and then Akane claps me on the shoulder, “Hey, that's a really good idea!” Then she signs to Shizune, “We’ll make sure there are scripts for all the hearing impaired students.”

I nod, and Shizune gives Akane and me a thankful nod.

The bell rings and we start to gather up our things. Akane gets close and whispers, “That was the least awkward lunch in a week. Thank you.”

I laugh, “You're welcome. Should I ask Misha about Lilly?”

Akane nods, “She is the only one who knows where she’s having lunch.”

I turn around and see that Shizune has left but Misha is still packing up her things. That's good, because I didn't want to upset Shizune by talking about this.

I approach her and say, “Misha, can I ask you something?”

She smiles ear to ear but I also see a little concern in her eyes, “Sure!”

“Do you know where Lilly eats now? I wanted to invite her too.”

Misha frowns and then sighs, “She's been eating in an empty classroom on the second floor. By the library. If you go tomorrow you'll find her there.”

“Okay, thanks, Misha. I'm sorry things are tough right now for the council. Hopefully you can get them to make up.”

She frowns, “Hopefully! They are both soooooo stubborn, though. I don't like my chances.”

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm standing outside what I think is the room where Lilly has been eating her lunch. There's only one way to find out though.

As I slide the door open I hear Lilly say, “Hanako?”

Didn't I hear that name somewhere else recently?

“U-um…no, Lilly. It's Nagisa.”

Now that I'm in the room I see that she is sitting at a table with her back to me. She has a tea set in front of her. The room has a window with a nice view of the woods outside campus.

“Ah, my apologies. I had invited someone to meet me here. Unfortunately, I don't think she’s coming.”

“Oh. Do you want me to see if I can find her? Maybe she's trying to find the room?”

“That's quite alright. There was only a low chance she would come, I think. Come in and have a seat. Would you like some tea?”

I take a seat in front of her and say, “Um…sure.”

She starts delicately moving her hands until she locates the tea set in front of her.

“I…can do it, if that helps.”

“Nonsense. You’re my guest, and I’m quite capable, I assure you.”

She locates a cup and loops her fingers around the handle before moving it to the side. Then she picks up the tea pot and pours the tea into it. Somehow, she stops when it's just the right amount of full.

She picks up the cup and places it down in front of me with a smile, “There is milk and sugar. Help yourself.”

“Thank you.”

I notice the tea smells quite different from the Japanese teas I am used to. Then I remember Lilly’s western heritage.

I’m not sure I’ll like this.

I put as much milk into the tea as I can without overflowing the cup and take a drink. Even with all that milk, it has an earthier, more bitter taste than I am used to. I am probably making a face, but I am glad Lilly can't see it. However, she’ll notice if my cup is still full when I leave, so I just have to drink it.

“It has been some time hasn't it?”

I put my tea cup down, “Y-yes. It has.”

She smiles as she sips some tea, “I suppose you have a reason to seek me out here.” Her voice sharpens ever so slightly, “Did Misha decide to send someone else to try to get me to come back?”

“N-no. I’m not here for that.”

Lilly sighs in relief, “Thank goodness.”

“I wanted to thank you for being so welcoming when I got here. During my first few days, you and…the other girls really helped me adjust.”

She smiles, “You’re very welcome.”

“I also wanted to personally invite you to the drama club’s play.”

I hold out the flier. She searches for it with her hand and she takes it with a bemused grin.

“I…just realized that the flier isn't very useful for you. Sorry.”

We should probably make some Braille ones.

Lilly laughs softly, “Yes. It feels like a very nice piece of paper, though.” She puts it down and then folds her hands and says, “Why don't you tell me what's on the flier?”

“U-um…well, it's me in my costume for the play - a purple monpe made from kimono scraps. But I'm a little transparent. My character is a ghost.”

“Interesting. So it's a ghost story?”

“Um…sort of. But it isn't the scary kind.”

“What's the play called?”

“It's called Living With Mother…based on a play by Hisashi Inoue called Living With Father. It's about a young woman who survived Hiroshima, but her family didn't. The play mostly focuses on this woman falling in love, and trying to sort out her feelings by talking to the ghost of her mother.”

Lilly nods thoughtfully, “It certainly sounds compelling. Who else is in the cast?”

“Chiyo Asashi is playing the young woman, and Ken Oribe is the man she's in love with.”

“Sounds like a good cast. I know Ken a little. Which also means I know Chiyo, of course.” She laughs softly, “It doesn't sound as if their roles will be particularly challenging for them, though.”

Does everyone at this school know they are in love? I guess it's pretty obvious. Even when you can't see.

I laugh, “You…might be right.”

“When is it?”

“It's at 5 on the day of the festival. In the auditorium.”

“Okay. I will be there. Thank you for the personal invitation.” She smiles warmly, “I'm very glad you got to do a play like you wanted.”

I can't help but smile back, “Me too. Um…will watching a play be hard for you?”

“It's true I can't watch it the same way most can. I suppose it's more like listening to a radio drama for someone with sight. But I actually quite like plays, especially the classical English ones. And this one sounds very interesting.”

She looks like she's weighing something for a moment and then she says, “This may sound a bit strange…but we’re friends and I think it will help me during the play. Would you let me feel your face? It's…really the only way I can experience what you look like. And I will be able to better perceive your facial expressions while you're acting.”

I feel a little taken aback by her request at first, but then feel a little flattered that she thinks of me as a friend.

“Oh. U-um…of course.” I get up and sit in the chair next to Lilly. She turns towards me and gently outstretches her hands. They end up on top of my head, and I laugh. So does she.

With a smile she says, “You're…quite small, aren't you?”

“Y-yes. I am. Especially compared to you.”

“Why don't you guide my hands to your face, so we can avoid any further mishaps.”

I take her hands and slowly guide her fingers to my cheeks.

Smiling all the while, she slowly moves out from them, sometimes pausing for a moment as her hands pass over different parts of my face. This goes on for a minute or two and then she takes her hands back and nods.

It's hard to even imagine how she perceives the world. I wouldn't have thought touching someone's face would be that useful to her, but I guess it's the best way for her to get this information.

“You are quite pretty, aren't you?”

I didn't expect her to say that, so I feel flustered, “U-um…I don't…think so.”

She smiles, “Well, I think you are. You have very nice skin and delicate facial features.”

“Th-thank you. Um…you’re very pretty too. I thought so the moment I met you.”

Lilly’s cheeks flush ever so slightly, “Thank you, Nagisa.”

I look around the lonely room where Lilly is eating and it makes me a little sad. She's so friendly and outgoing but eating here all on her own now.

“I-if…you want to, I think you'd be welcome to eat lunch with the drama club. Especially if you already know Ken and Chiyo too.”

Lilly smiles, “I'll think about it. I'm actually trying to make a new friend that I hope will eat me with here. I chose this place with her in mind.”

I nod, “I understand. Well, the invitation is always open.”

I've managed to personally invite everyone I wanted to to our play, with one exception. So, right now I'm on the way to the library. When I walk through the door I'm very happy to see the girl with long, beautiful dark hair sitting on a bean bag.

I slowly approach her, before standing in front of her and saying, “H-hi there.”

Like last time, she holds her book in front of her face like a shield. Only this time, she's already shaking a little. I must have scared her. I tried to move slowly so I wouldn't startle her. But maybe she was engrossed in her book.

“Sorry. I'm…that girl from a while back. The one you told about Living with Father.”

Her body seems to relax a little. But the book stays in place.

She whispers, “D-did you…like it?”

“I did. I'm in drama club, and we're going to do it on stage at the festival. I…wanted to thank you for suggestion. And invite you to come.”

I hold out the flier. But then realize she can't see me. I slowly slide it in front of her book. She doesn't object, and the book moves slightly as she holds the flier with one hand.

Then, to my surprise, she closes the book and puts it in her lap. I think I catch a glimpse of violet eyes before the flier takes the book’s place.

She whispers, “L-living with…Mother?”

“Yes. We had to change it a little because we had two girls and one boy.”

“Y-you're…the mother?”

“That's right.”

She lowers the flier so that I can see her dark fringes and the top parts of her right eye. Now I know they are definitely violet. I think she’s examining me.

She quietly says, “I…like your c-costume.”

“Thank you. One of the other drama club members made it.”

She pulls the flier back up and whispers, “I…I want to come see it b-b-but…I…” She takes a sharp breath. I know enough about crying to know she’s close to tears and doing everything she can to hold them in.

This would be really hard for her. There will be lots of people. She has a hard time even looking at me. I’m so stupid.

“I-it's okay. I understand. I just wanted you to know you inspired the drama club.”

Just as I’m about to give up and leave her alone so she can relax, an idea comes to me.

“I-if you wanted to, you could come to our last dress rehearsal. The night before at 6. It will pretty much be the same as the day of the play. It will just be the three of us on stage, our director, and maybe our adviser.”

The girl whispers, “U-um…U-um….I’ll…think about it. Th-thank you.”

She looks down, folds up the flier, puts it in her bag, and then quickly puts her hand over the right side of her face, before looking down and opening her book again and holding it in front of her face. I guess the conversation is over.

“You’re welcome. I-it…was nice talking to you.”

I start to walk away and hear a faint whisper. I was too far away to know for sure, but I think she said, “N-nice talking to you, too.”

There's one week until the festival.

My drama clubmates and I are standing together in the aisle of the auditorium, looking up at the stage.

We just finished putting our set together. It only took a few hours. Daiki is much stronger than I realized, because he was able to carry the wooden walls with only a little help from the rest of us. It worried me a lot, because he wasn't using his cane. But at this point I know I can trust him to know his limits.

He and Ken rigged the walls so they would stay in place. Just like he wanted, there are two walls on either side of the stage, and one about four meters back, with a window.

Chiyo and I put down some tatami all along the floor of the little house. We also put in a futon, a chabudai, and a counter space near a prop oven for her kitchen.

It really does look like a cozy little home for a single woman in the post-war era. It makes me miss my family home a little too, since we sleep in futons and use tatami.

I guess we’re a little old-fashioned. I'm glad I get to see my parents in a week.

Daiki says, “Well…now that we have the set how we want it, we need to think about how it’ll change in between scenes. Luckily, we don’t have that much to move.”

Ken nods, “Yeah, can we nail that down tonight? I know we’re all tired but…I’m a little anxious about that.”

Daiki nods, “Sure. I think we’ll probably leave the kitchen area and chabudai alone, but we should move the futon around some to show that time is passing. We could even hang it out the window to air out and stuff.”

I nod, “That’s a good idea!”

Daiki laughs, “I’m glad you like it, because it will be your responsibility to move it, since Chiyo is in every scene and never leaves the stage. We’ll find a couple spots where you come in with the lights down and you’ll have time to move it.”

I nod, “I-I can do that.”

Chiyo nods, “Great! We'll practice that a bunch so we can do it seamlessly.”

After that, we practice how we'll enter and exit each scene several times. And when and how to move the futon. This is most important for Ken, who has to get used to the dimensions of the set and where the furniture is located.

Akane and I are in my room quietly doing some homework. Well, I am. She already finished hers while I was at drama club. So she's on the bed with my dango plush and standing by in case I need help.

Before long, Chiyo drops by. This has been how most evenings go since she and Akane make up. After she and Ken part ways for the day, she comes here and does homework with us and we chat about our days.

Today, though, she doesn't have any homework with her. And she has a look on her face that I would describe as desperate.

Before I can say something, Akane sits up in the bed and says, “Everything okay?”

“I need…to talk about Ken.”

Akane nods and starts to get up to leave, but Chiyo waves her hand at her, “You can stay.”

Akane smiles, “Really?”

“Yeah, yeah, I trust you again. And could probably use multiple perspectives. Don't let it go to your already very large head.”

Akane's smile gets wider in spite of the insult, “O-okay.”

I ask, “D-did…something happen?”

Chiyo sits down on the bed and sighs, “Not really. That's the problem. But it's getting to the point where I can't stand touching him or being alone with him without k-kissing him and stuff. Normally I'm just happy to be with him. But right now it's driving me crazy.”

“Well…you’re going to tell him soon, aren't you? After the play?”

“I…don't know.”

Akane raises her eyebrows, “Being around him makes you want him, but you don't want to tell him and then…actually have him?”

Akane clasps her hands together and shakes her head. She is uncharacteristically quiet when she says, “I…I’m just so scared.”

Akane scoots closer to her, “I get…being scared to tell him. But he’s crazy about you too. I can see it. He’s always walking arm and arm with you for a reason.”

Chiyo scoffs, “Yeah, because he needs help.”

Akane shakes her head, “You might be as dense as he is.”

Chiyo glares at her, “We only very recently became friends again. I don't know if I'm in a place where I want to be teased by you.”

Akane sighs and says, “Nagisa, take over.” Then she pretends to zip her lips shut.

“Um…what she means is…he might be asking you for help for reasons other than needing help. After all, he never asks anyone else to help him. I've never seen him walk like that with anyone else. He uses his cane when you aren't around.”

She smiles, “Ohhh. You're right.” She turns to Akane, "Why couldn't you just say it like that?”

Akane sighs in response.

Chiyo laughs and looks back at me, “So…you're saying…he wants to touch me?”

Akane says, “Bingo.”

Chiyo scoffs, “That zipper didn't last long.”

“Well, I won't say anything else insulting. Promise. Especially now that you finally got there.”

Chiyo laughs, “Way to immediately contradict yourself. But whatever.”

Akane points at Chiyo’s chest, “Look, all we're saying is that he's walking arm in arm with you as often as possible to touch your boobs.”

“Akane! Th-that's not-”

Chiyo interrupts me with a flushed face, “Th-that a move you use, Akane?”

Akane blushes a little, “I…have, yeah. Works nicely on busty girls.”

Chiyo cracks up laughing and so does Akane. I can't help but join in, even if I don't agree that Ken's doing it to touch her chest. At least, that's not the only reason. He just likes to be close to her.

After she stops laughing, Chiyo says, “I get it. There's a good chance he likes me. And I'm glad he wants to touch me. Nagisa has helped me feel more confident about all that too. But…that's not what scares me. Not the main thing, anyway.”

Akane looks dumbfounded, “Huh? Are you a commitment phobe or something?”

I haven't filled Akane in on this part of Chiyo’s relationship concerns. I assumed it was something Chiyo would tell her when she's ready.

Though I am a little surprised she didn't figure it out, given their big falling out.

An exasperated Chiyo locks eyes with Akane, “You know why. Think about it. Remember why we had our fight?”

Akane's face slowly morphs from confusion, to realization, to sadness.

“You're right. I do. I’M the dense one now.”

Chiyo nods, “Agreed.” Then she frowns and puts a hand on her lower abdomen and starts to get choked up, “Even i-if he likes me…he likes a Chiyo that he thinks can have children one day. B-but that…that's not me.” She starts to tear up a little, and Akane hugs her before I can. Chiyo hugs her back.

I say, “I-I know that's hard. And neither of us can ever understand how hard. But…I think Ken will understand.”

While still hugging Akane, Chiyo tearfully says, “B-but…what if that's important to him? What if he always imagined having a pregnant wife?”

Akane says, “He’ll adjust his imagination. He loves you, Chiyo. Deeply. And truly.”

Chiyo breaks the hug and looks Akane in the eyes, “How can you be so sure?”

“I’ve seen you two together enough to know. Even when we weren't talking and I saw you two, I could tell he loved you.”

Chiyo flashes a mischievous grin, “That can't be everything, though. Maybe you know a little something about friends falling in love? That's why you can spot the signs?”

Akane gets flustered and is speechless for a second before she says, “I…I do know something about that. I fell in love…with Misha, you know?” She smiles, “That's the busty girl who I walked arm in arm with after all.”

With a twinkle in her eyes, Chiyo replies, “You seem like too much of an expert. Is that the only time you fell in love with a friend?”

Akane’s face turns red and she looks away from Chiyo. I don't understand why.

Maybe she is having feelings for Misha again? That would make this hard to talk about.

Chiyo puts her hand on Akane’s shoulder and smiles, “Sorry…I shouldn’t have brought that up. Now I’m the one who was teasing but went too far.”

Akane smiles back and looks a little less embarrassed now.

Chiyo continues, “But anyway…maybe you’re right he’d accept it. Because of love.” She looks at me and then back at Akane, “But…how should I even approach it? How do I tell him?”

I reply, “I think…just confess first.”

Akane nods, “Talking about the future will start pretty quickly, with graduation coming. Tell him about your health then.”

Chiyo nods and purses her lips thoughtfully, “It won’t be…misleading not to tell him right away? It'd be like…selling him damaged goods.”

“D-don't say that!”

Akane shrugs, “I dunno, Nagisa. She's kind of right.”

Chiyo says, “I…am?”

I feel a rare emotion bubbling inside of me - anger. I jump to my feet and raise my voice, “Sh-she's not damaged!”

Akane assertively says, “I think she is. But so are you. And so am I. So is everyone. No one tells their partner everything in the early days of a relationship. And no one's perfect.” She turns to Akane, “There's probably something about Ken that will surprise you down the road.”

My anger fades away and now I feel a little embarrassed about my reaction. Akane laughs, “I might have to make you angry more often. It was pretty cute.”

I need to take a class on how to be angry and intimidating. Daiki basically said the same thing. Hopefully I'm more convincing on stage.

I sigh and disregard her comment. Then I turn to Chiyo, “She's right…and because you and Ken love each other…you'll understand and accept his…damage, i-if you have to call it that. He will accept yours too. I know he will.”

Chiyo sighs, “Damn. You two are both that sure about this?”

Akane and I exchange a look and then I turn to her and nod and I say, “Do you think we're wrong?”

Chiyo shakes her head and then looks down and grips the hem of her skirt so tightly her knuckles turn white. She’s quiet for a while, then she looks up at each of us, “Okay.” She takes a deep breath. “Okay. I'm going to tell him. At the festival. After the play. You're both right…I…I have to do it. I won't back out this time.”

I smile at Akane, who smiles back at me.

I couldn't convince her to go for it on my own. I'm happy that we convinced her together. Especially because I think it means Akane and Chiyo are truly friends again.

Three days until the festival.

We are doing our first dress rehearsal. And the first few scenes have gone really well.

As I’m walking off the stage with the lights down after one of my scenes and feeling very good about things, I suddenly remember I was supposed to move the futon. I whirl around and open my mouth to say something, but it's already too late.

Ken trips on the futon and lands on it. Luckily it gave him a soft landing and he looks unhurt. I'm very relieved. I messed up, but I won't make that mistake again.

Because he looks okay, I'm very surprised when he slams his fist on the ground and angrily bellows, “DAMMIT! WHY THE FUCK WAS THAT FUTON THERE!?”

I flinch at his outburst and find myself at a loss for words, with my mouth helplessly opening and closing like a fish gasping for air. I end up clenching my eyes shut.

I've never seen him get even slightly upset before. He's normally so reserved and calm.

My mistake must be much worse than I realize if he made him react that way. He’s yelling and cursing at ME. And I deserve it.

I hear Chiyo walk over and say, “Are you okay, Ken?”

He curtly responds, “Yeah. Fine.”

He still sounds so mad. I can't open my eyes and see that.

Then I hear Daiki, Ken, and Chiyo talking quietly together at the front of the stage.

They're talking about how I messed up. I know they are. Ken probably wants to kick me out of the play. He could have gotten hurt. It's my fault

Now I hear Chiyo and Ken coming towards me. I brace myself, anticipating the worst.

Now they are right in front of me. Chiyo says, “Something you want to say, Ken?”

“Um…yeah. Sorry, Nagisa. That was…uncalled for.”

I shake my head, with my eyes still sealed shut, “No! I-it wasn't! I messed up. I-I'm…I'm so sorry.”

He says, “Mistakes happen. It's okay.”

I open my eyes, and he still looks annoyed. But not angry.

“Just…make sure it doesn't happen when we have an audience, okay?”

My heart starts beating very fast.

What if I DO mess it up again?

Chiyo says, “Ken!” and slaps his arm. And they have a conversation, and I think they both said something to me. And I nodded. But it's all a blur. All I can think about is what will happen if I make the same mistake.

I can't do this.

The rest of rehearsal after that is a disaster. I regularly forget my lines, where I am supposed to be on stage, and when I'm supposed to be on stage. Each time I make a mistake, the doubts in my head get louder.

I can't do this. I CAN'T DO THIS. I CAN'T DO THIS!

After the rehearsal I intentionally take my time changing out of my costume. Chiyo and Ken leave when I tell them to go on ahead, and when I get out of the dressing room I don't see Daiki either.

That's a relief, because I've been on the verge of tears since my first mistake and now that I'm alone, I can finally let them go.

I head to the club room and I sit down at the table where we eat our lunch and I lay my head on my arms and I cry.

Why did I EVER think I could do this? Ken and Chiyo are so good and I'm ruining everything. Why do they even put up with me? Why did they let me join drama club? Why did they let me on the stage?

Why did I EVER think I could do this? I have no experience. I have no idea how to be a good actress. I'm ruining this play that Ken, Akane, and Daiki have worked so hard on. I'm going to make a fool of myself in front of everyone and it's going to make them all look bad.

Why did I EVER think I could do this? Why did I invite so many people? My parents are coming! What if I make a mistake with them watching? My dad was such a good actor and I'm TERRIBLE.

I don't know what to do. I-

Suddenly, the club room door opens and the light comes on.

I sit up and hastily wipe my tears away on my sleeve. I hear Daiki’s deep voice, “Someone in here?”

“U-um…yes.”

“Nagisa? Why were the lights-”

Once he’s close enough to see me, he stops talking and walking and I can see on his face that he’s very worried about me. I guess I didn't do a good job hiding that I was crying.

“Is everything okay?”

“Y-yeah.”

I must not have been convincing. He frowns and takes a seat in his throne chair next to me, “Anything I can do to help?”

I shake my head.

He gently puts his hand on my back, “Okay. You let me know if there is. I can also leave you alone if that's what you want.”

He's so sweet. And so good at comforting me. And that's what I need right now. That's what my instincts are telling me.

“Th-that's not what I want. Stay. Please.”

“Okay, I'll-”

While he’s still mid-sentence, I bury my face in his chest and I start to sob again. He puts his arms around me, and it makes me feel very safe. And it keeps my thoughts from getting quite as negative as they did when I was alone.

This goes on for a few minutes until I feel hollow from crying so much.

Once I do, I feel a lot better. I'm still anxious and scared, but it's more manageable now.

I sit up and see that Daiki has a few tears on his face.

“A-are you okay?”

He laughs and wipes his tears, “Says the girl who just sobbed for several minutes. I’m fine. You already know I’m a bit of a crier, don't you?”

I nod, “But…that was for Tortie.”

He shrugs, “And this was for you. I'm only crying because you are. And I can see you’re having a really hard time.”

I nod, “I…am.”

“Is it…what happened tonight with Ken?”

I nod, “Y-yeah. I just…don't want to mess things up for Chiyo and Ken. I don't even know what I'm doing out there. Especially after tonight. What if I make those mistakes at the festival?”

Daiki says, “I know Ken got upset. But it wasn’t with you. Mostly, at least.”

“H-he should be upset with me! I'm the one who was supposed to move the futon when the lights went down and I messed it up!”

“You're right. You did. But mistakes happen. And yours was a small one for most actors, who would just walk around the futon. That's what frustrated Ken the most. His own limitations.”

I sigh, “I should be even more careful because Ken can’t see.”

“Nagisa…you’ve done it right in every other rehearsal. And I bet you’ll do it right every other time from now on, too.”

I shake my head, “It isn't even just the futon. I feel like…I just weigh them down on stage. I don't belong up there with them.”

“That's not true. You’re great. You have the hardest role in this play and you’ve been amazing.”

“I was horrible tonight. D-don’t lie to me.”

“Okay. I won't. You were bad tonight.”

I clench my eyes shut and bow my head.

Even though I told him to be honest, it's hard to hear him say that.

“But you've been doing great on the whole, Nagisa. Really. You only had a bad night because of what happened with Ken. You're doing a great job overall, okay?”

I open my eyes and look up at him, “Thank you but…is that what they think?”

Daiki looks confused, “They…both told you that tonight after Ken apologized.”

“R-really? I didn't really hear them…b-because I was so upset with myself.”

“Really. I’ll make sure they tell you again tomorrow.”

“Y-you don't have to…”

“As director, it's my job to make sure you are feeling as good as you can about things. So, that's what I’m gonna do. If they knew you were feeling this way, they would want to tell you, anyway.”

“Wh-what if…I have a bad night…the night of the performance?”

“You won't.”

“Y-you can't know that!”

He sighs, “I can't know for sure. But I'm very confident you won't. I've seen you nail it too many times. You're great in this role. Today was an aberration.”

“Aberr…ation?”

He laughs, “One-time thing. We'll do everything we can to make sure you feel good about stuff. As much practice as it takes for you to feel confident again. We can start right now if you want to.”

“What about Chiyo and Ken?”

He grins, “I'll play both of their roles, of course. I'm actually the best actor in the club, just didn't want to intimidate all of you. I could even do all three roles.” He looks off thoughtfully, “Maybe a one-man version of this play would work. Hmmm…yes. I would look good in monpe.”

I don't know if it's because I’m so tired from everything or the deadpan way he said it, but I crack up laughing. I laugh so hard it's a little hard to breathe. Apparently it's contagious, because Daiki starts laughing too.

Once we come down from our laughing fit, I put my hand on his arm, “Th-thank you, Daiki. I feel much better thanks to you. But um…I’m…sorry I…tackled you and cried like that.”

He gives me a big smile, “I’m not. Helping you is important to me. And not just because I’m the director. I’m your friend. Helping you feel even a little bit better means a lot to me. Whether it's holding you when you cry or just…helping you see how great you are. I’ll always be happy to do it.”

I smile at him, “Th-thank you, Daiki. I hope you know I would do the same for you. B-but…you don’t fall to pieces all the time like me.” I giggle, “And…I probably can't quite hold you, anyway.”

He laughs with me, “No, I don't think that would end well. But…I do know that you would do anything for me or your other friends. That's part of why I l-...Why I'm happy we're friends.”

I feel a small pain in my chest.

I'm almost certain that he almost just said he loves me.

It hurts to know he still feels that way. Especially because I just relied on him so much. I shouldn’t have gotten so physical. It probably hurts him.

I was hoping he would move on since I can't be with him. I don't want him to hurt.

But…it also feels good to know he feels that way too. He's such a great person. And he loves me. It makes me feel happy and warm in my chest.

There’s just also pain.

And the warm feeling makes me think of Tomoya too. Who I know I'm still in love with.

My feelings are so jumbled.

I smile at him and say, “I'm happy we're friends too. Thank you for helping me.”

After that, we walk back to the dorms together, with me feeling much more confident about everything. I still have some anxiety, and it’s going to be hard. But Daiki gave me the push I needed to see that I can do this. I'll do my very best.

We’re about to start the last dress rehearsal. Last night's went off without any problems and I feel much better. I’m still a little worried, but I have something else to distract me from it.

I’m standing on the stage looking towards the door.

I hope she comes.

Daiki says, “Nagisa, we should probably get started. I know you wanted her to come, and we gave her some time, but we need to start or we’ll be here really late.”

I sigh, “Yeah. I know. I wasn't sure she would come anyway. Let's get started.”

…

Tonight's rehearsal went really well too.

Just as the house lights are coming back on, I look to see if anyone is in the auditorium. I smile when I spot a flash of dark hair going through the door.

I hope she liked it. She stayed the whole time, that's a good sign.

…

After I get in my pajamas and I'm about to get in bed, there's a knock on my door. It's probably Akane, wanting to know how rehearsal went.

I'm shocked when I open the door and see the dark-haired girl from the library. Now that she's standing, I see that she is much taller than I am. I have to look up at her.

Without any greeting, she quietly says, “I-it was…good.”

She doesn't have a book in front of her face this time, but the lighting in the hallway isn't very good. So I still can’t see much of her face.

Like I thought I had glimpsed before, she has purple eyes. She also has lop-sided bangs that hang over the left side of her face. She puts her hand up over that side of her face and looks away from me when my eyes linger.

“Th-thank you. I'm glad you made it.”

She nods with her hand still covering half her face, “...th-th-thank you for letting me come.”

“You deserved a special screening. Since you gave us the idea.”

She smiles softly and her voice get a little louder when she says, “I-it's…a very special story to me.” I think I see a few tears make it down her cheeks and then she barely audibly says, “I-I…think I like it even better…with a mother.”

She says the words so quietly it takes me a moment to understand them.

She seems upset. But also happy. This play really IS special to her. Personal even. If that's true, her life must have been very hard.

“Thank you.” I take a small step towards her, “Would it be okay if I hugged you?”

She shakes her head violently, and a look of panic creeps across her face. She takes a large step backward and looks down the hall.

I should have known better than to ask that. I just want to comfort her somehow. But I know I can't.

Feeling she might run away, I quickly say, “Okay. I won't. I promise.”

She relaxes some, but doesn't come any closer to the door.

I smile at her, “Thank you so much for telling me you enjoyed it. I've been a little anxious about tomorrow. A-and hearing that someone who knows the play so well enjoyed my performance…i-it makes me feel so much better. I will sleep well tonight, thanks to you.”

Her eyes get wide, “Y-you…get…anxious?”

I nod, “This is my first play. And I…made some mistakes in rehearsal recently and it has made me worry. But…you saw it tonight and liked it. So I feel much better.”

I think I see a soft smile on her face, “I-I'm g-glad I could help. Y-you were really really g-good.” She pauses for a minute and continues, “I…cried specifically because y-you were so good as the mother. I…I know everyone else will like it t-tomorrow. I w-would watch it again i-if I could.”

That's by far the most she's ever said to me at once. I know it wasn't easy for her. And she did it because she's trying to comfort me. She's such a sweet girl.

Just as I start to get choked up by her praise, she abruptly and quietly says, “I…have to go,” before turning and heading down the hall.

I call out, “M-my name's Nagisa.”

She stops for a moment, and without turning says, “H-Hanako,” before continuing on her way down the hall.

I close my door and get in bed with a smile on my face.

Hanako!!! Also Nagisa getting into a spiral of messing up and then feeling bad about herself is such a mood. Glad Daiki was there to help.

It's the day of the festival. And the day of my first performance in front of an audience.

I woke up with lots of butterflies in my stomach.

Some of them are excitement butterflies. I'm very excited to see my parents. They’re going to come to the play and afterwards we’re going to enjoy the festival together. I miss them so much.

Some of them are nervous butterflies. I’m very nervous about the play.

I'm feeling far more confident after the last two rehearsals and Hanako's praise last night, but even though I'm confident, I can't help but feel some anxiety. Chiyo told me she's nervous too, and that made me feel a little better.

Luckily, right now I have something to distract me from all those butterflies. Akane, Chiyo and I are going to the band’s festival concert.

Chiyo and I are walking out on the quad and it’s amazing seeing it transformed. There are dozens of food and game booths, since every class and club has to do something for the festival. And there are many more people on campus than usual, including student family members and people who live in the town at the bottom of the hill.

“D-do you think all these people will be at the play?”

Chiyo laughs, “Doubt it. Not everyone wants to go to a play, you know?”

I nod.

“But I think we'll have a really good audience. We were better at advertising this year than last year, and they will announce the play over the loudspeaker later too, which will probably get a few people to come.”

“Th-that's good.”

“Are you nervous there will be too many people?”

I shake my head, “I'll be nervous no matter how small the audience is. I don't think it's worse if there are more.”

Chiyo and I are on the way to my class’s booth to pick up Akane. As class rep, she is in charge of our booth. She’s already been working for a couple of hours, but she’s taking a break for the concert. And another one later for the play.

When we get to the booth, we see that there are a few people in line. Akane is working the cash register and Madoka and another of my classmates, a boy named Aoi, are grilling yakitori.

Akane sees us and smiles and waves. We wave back. After about 10 minutes, the line is gone, so Chiyo and I approach the booth.
A tired Akane sighs and takes off her apron, “I'm glad that rush is over. I was worried I wouldn't make it to the concert.” She looks at Madoka, “Is it still cool if I cut out for 30 minutes or so?”

Madoka walks up to Akane with a smile and a nod “We got a lot grilled that we can keep warm. So I can work the register if need be. And reinforcements are coming soon. So, take your time.”

Akane gives her a thankful nod, “Thanks.”

…

We were running a little bit late. So, when we got to the outdoor stage where the concert is, it was hard to find three seats together, but we found some just as the music teacher is announcing the program. We take a seat right when the music starts.

I don't know very much about music. But I like the sound of what they are playing. It sounds…peaceful and elegant, whatever it is.

I try and find Saki, but before I do, I see her friend Chisato. She's the only one playing piano, so it is easy to spot her. I hadn't realized she was in band too. She is playing with a confident smile on her face and seems to be enjoying herself.

I go back to looking through the band for Saki, and I find her sitting next to a couple of other violin players. As I'm watching her and enjoying the sound of the band's music, suddenly she is the only one playing.

She must be really good if she has a solo.

I recognize the music. It's what I heard her playing both other times I heard her play. I cross my fingers and watch her intently, remembering that those two performances didn't end the way she wanted them to.

While I don't know for sure what it's supposed to sound like, I think I know Saki well enough now that I'd be able to tell from her face if she made a mistake. She finishes her solo and the rest of the band joins her. I breathe a sigh of relief and once I relax I notice my entire body was tense.

Akane is looking at me with a raised eyebrow. She mouths the words, “Was it good?” And holds up a tentative thumbs up. I smile and return her thumbs up and she looks similarly relieved.

I hadn't thought about the fact that music without words is probably more difficult for her to enjoy. She told me one time that she can hear rhythm and words but not notes. With this performance, she only has a rhythm that she can hear. It's really sweet of her to come support Saki despite that.

When the concert finishes, Akane has to run off to her booth. Chiyo and I don’t have a ton of time ourselves before we have to report backstage, but we wait for the crowd to thin out and wave Saki down when she steps off the stage.

She smiles and comes up to us, “Hey you two! Thanks for coming.”

I nod, “O-of course. It was really good. Akane was here too, but she had to run back to her booth.”

Saki sighs, “Tell me about it. I'm about to go back to my booth, too. But it's kinda fun, we are doing the fishing game.” She smiles, “I'll be coming to the play later, though. Chisato is covering for me.”

Chiyo says, “Great! I hope we perform as well as you just did.”

Saki scoffs, “I'm sure you will. I'm still amazed by the little part I saw at our photoshoot!”

…

I just finished changing into my costume. I leave Chiyo behind in the changing room and when I step out I see Daiki leaning against the wall. He smiles when he sees me.

“How are you feeling?”

“N-nervous but…a normal amount I think.”
Daiki nods, “Yeah, I'm nervous too and all I do is flip some switches.”

I laugh and poke his arm, “That’s not all you do. You're the director. And you designed all the lights and sound. And you made almost the whole set!”

He smiles, “That's true. But that work is all done now. For this performance, I seriously just flip switches.”

“I…guess that's true. Some of it has to be timed just right though!”

He laughs, “I appreciate you trying to tell me I'm working just as hard you guys today, but it just isn’t true.”

Ken and Chiyo come out of their changing rooms at almost the same time and bump into each other, prompting an awkward laugh out of each of them. With flushed cheeks, Chiyo wraps her arm around his and they walk up to us.

Daiki checks his watch and says, “20 minutes until curtain.”

Chiyo and Ken nod confidently, but there is definitely some anxiety on their faces too.

Daiki smiles and says, “I was just telling Nagisa that all I have to do tonight is flip some switches. You three have the harder job tonight for sure.”

He smiles a little wider, “But I know we're all going to do great.”
…

So far, everything has gone really well. And from what I can tell we have a large audience. There has been laughter at the funny parts and silence and even a little sniffling during the sad parts.

The play is almost over. I'm standing just off stage watching the scene when Ken’s character confesses to Chiyo. But I’m only half-listening as I mentally prepare for my last scene.

It's kind of funny watching this when I know that Chiyo is planning to confess to Ken later.

I hear my cue. My final scene is next. It is also the most important for the entire play because it resolves everything. I take a deep breath as the lights go out and Ken walks off the stage.

I CAN do this.

Dorayaki.

The lights come back on just as Chiyo has gotten into her futon. I walk out of the shadows and kneel next to her. She has her back turned to me.
I playfully say, “So…I was right about the anpan after all, wasn't I? He confessed to ya today, didn't he?”

Chiyo sighs and rolls over in her futon to look at me with knitted eyebrows, “Ya come here outta the blue and go on and on and won’t shut up about a stupid anpan. How am I supposed to think straight?”

I click my tongue at her and say, “Ya can't think straight because ya fancy that fellow. It's love at first sight, for the both of ya, and it won't be long before ya won't have eyes for anybody else. Hard as a rock on the outside but drippin' with sweetness on the inside. Your heart is just one big anpan!”

Chiyo groans and covers her eyes, “Ugh! You watch me tomorrow, mother! Watch me tell Mr. Kinoshita in no uncertain terms never to speak to me again! Maybe then you'll leave me alone!”

I sigh dejectedly, “There's no harm in fancyin' the fellow, dear. You're keen on him an' he's keen on you. Get yerselves together an’ live happily ever after.”

She sits up and yells at me, startling me, “I can't ever be happy, so just stop talking, mother!”

I study her for a moment and then say, “Ya silly little thing. What do ya mean ya can't be happy?”

“You…know why, mother. You were there.”

The lights turn off for a moment. With them off, Chiyo gets out of the futon and I lay down on the tatami. She kneels next to me and holds my hand.

The lights comes back up, now with an orange tint to them. Daiki did something to make them flicker, too.

I say, “I saw it full on, two suns of blazing fire.”

Chiyo sniffles, “Mama…”

I continue, "It was…a great ball of fire, blindingly white at the center with a weird kinda yellow and red outline.” I look at Chiyo, “What happened then?”

She bows her head, “I was…shielded from the heat coming from the fireball by our stone lantern.”

I laugh softly, “Oh, that big stone lantern! It cost us an arm and a leg, but it was sure worth every penny.”
I look at Chiyo again and give her a soft smile, “Then, ya came to me and ya tried to cover me by layin’ on top of me. An’ over and over again you put out the flames that came off me. I was grateful, but I knew that we'd both die if ya just kept on doin’ that, so I said to you, ‘Get outta here, Mitsue!’ You said, ‘No, I won't!’ and stayed, and we just repeated that over and over again, ‘Get out!’ ‘No, I won't!’

Chiyo shakes her head with a grim smile, “Then you said, ‘Okay, let's play rock paper scissors. I'm gonna put out rock, so you don't have a prayer of winnin'.’

I nod and say, "Ready or not, here I go!"

We both hold out a fist.

“I see through you, mother.”

I shout, "Here I go!"

We both hold out our fists again.

“You're not gonna get away with it, mother!”

"And let's go!"

We both hold out fists again.

“I've been on to ya since I was a little girl, mother.”

I scoff and say, "Ready, let's go!"

We both hold out fists again.

I sigh in frustration and hold back my tears, “Why won't ya put out paper, eh?! Can't you see that I want ya to win an’ get outta here? Now stop bein’ such a bad girl. Show a little respect for yer mother, will ya!”

I start gasping for breath, as the heat and pain becomes too much.

“Do as yer…mother…says for this one last time, I'm beggin' ya, Mitsue. If ya…don't run away right now…”

The lights go down and Chiyo and I return to our original positions. Her in the futon, and me kneeling next to her.

The lights come back up and Chiyo tearfully says, “I…left you there. But I should have died beside you.”

I raise my voice, “What on earth makes ya say such a thing!?”

She bows her head without looking at me, “I don't deserve to live.”

I pound on the floor with my fist and grit my teeth, raising my voice even higher, “Don't you EVER say a thing like that!”

She sits up on her knees on the futon and reaches out to me, “Listen to me, mother!”

I scoff and shake my head, “I'm not gonna listen to a word of this.”

Chiyo crosses her arms and doubles over with her hands around her abdomen, tears streaming down her face.

She’s so good that it makes my job a lot easier, because I can’t see my friend looking like this without having an emotional reaction myself.

“All of my friends are gone! Etsuko died while standing in a fire-prevention reservoir. Kaori was just walkin’ along, her tongue swollen outta her mouth like she was chewin’ on a huge eggplant. Fumiko had gotten married just after graduation...and she died with her baby at her breast. The baby, too, went to the other world soon after, pressing its little face to her breasts, without even an inklin’ of what this world is like.”

She pauses and sobs for a moment, her shoulders shaking violently. Then she looks up at me, tears still streaming down my face.

“A-and Michiko, my friend at the telephone exchange. Two of her coworkers were too scared to move, so she put her arms around ‘em and told ‘em to be brave 'cause she wouldn't leave ‘em. She protected ‘em until she died, too, right there. And there's you, too, mother…” She pauses to sob a few more times before continuing, “To die in Hiroshima was the natural thing to do. To survive here is unnatural. That's why my bein’ alive now is wrong. I…I shouldn't be here.”

There are tears on my face now too. I make a move to try and comfort her with a hug, before being disappointed that I'm only a ghost, so I can’t. So, I do my best to comfort her with a smile and my voice, “Well I can tell ya, we dead people don't see it that way. I'm perfectly at peace with what happened to me, sweetie. So…just try an’ find happiness, will ya?”

She shakes her head without hesitation, “I don’t deserve to be happy! I don't even deserve to be alive. But I don't have the courage to die either. So I'm just goin’ to live a quiet life and, when I get the chance, leave life just as quietly. Alone.”

I start to get desperate so I strain my voice, “Listen to me, will ya! Have you forgotten my last words!?”

The lights go down again, and we switch places again with me on my back and Chiyo kneeling next to me and holding my hand. The lights come back on with the orange tint.

Chiyo looks devastated as I look up at her and say, “Please…Mitsue…Live. Live your life for the both of us. Promise me.”

She nods, sniffles and says, “I-I will…” Then she stands up and backs away from me, before turning and running off the stage.

The lights go down. Chiyo comes back and we switch places again.

Then the lights come back up and I smile at her and say, “I was so relieved that I finally got ya to leave and so happy that you would survive. So, ya see, ya will go on livin’ because of me. An’ all the others.”

She looks at me in confusion, “Because of…all of you?”

“Yes. Go on livin’ so that the world will remember that tens of thousands of people have had to say goodbye like that and it's inhuman.”

She gently says “Okay. I…I can do that. I’ll live. But I can't ever love. Or be happy. N-not without you, mother! N-not when all of you are gone. It wouldn't be right.”

I smile softly at her, “Ya can love. In fact I happen to know ya do love this man. I know he’ll make ya happy. And ya should be happy. Me an’ all the others you loved want that for ya, sweetie. More than anythin’. An’ he loves you too. All ya have to do is accept him and be honest about how you’re feelin’.”

Chiyo sits in silence for a moment and then nods. She reaches out to me, and our hands get as close as they can without actually touching. “Y-you’re right. I…think I can be happy with him. If that’s what you want. I would be lettin’ you and all the others down if I’m not, wouldn't I?”

I give her a confident nod.

“I-is there anythin’ else I can do for ya?”

I think for a moment and then smile mischievously, “A grandchild...would be nice.”

Chiyo and I look at each other in silence for several seconds, both of us teary-eyed. Then she wipes her tears and asks, “Will I see you again?”

I smile, “Depends on you.”

Chiyo smiles for the first time in the entire play, “I think…it will be a while. Thank you mother. I love you.”

The lights go down and I walk off the stage, passing Ken as I do. When the lights are up again, Ken is standing where I was, and the two of them embrace each other.

Then the lights go out, and the audience starts applauding. It's so much louder than I expected it to be.

A smile forms on my face, as I get with the other two cast members and walk to the front of the stage. The lights come up and the three of us bow together.

Now that I see the audience, I see that the auditorium is crowded. It isn’t entirely full, but there must be a hundred people.

And all of them keep clapping. Many of them are standing and cheering. I think I can hear my father saying my name, but I can’t seem to find him in the crowd. Some boy I don’t recognize comes up to the edge of the stage and gives Chiyo a bouquet with a note in them. She takes them reluctantly.

Probably a confession.

I gesture for Daiki to come and join us on stage. He does so after I won't take no for an answer. I take his hand and then the four of us bow.

Now that we’re all here I look out at the audience with a smile and let the applause wash over me, I enjoy every minute of it. And I know my club mates do too.

We did it. We performed our play. And people enjoyed it. We worked together towards a common goal and we did something wonderful. I’m so happy.

…

The four of us in the drama club are backstage. Chiyo and I are in one of the changing rooms getting out of our costumes. Surprisingly, we haven't said anything to one another so far. But we haven't stopped smiling since we left the stage.

I finish changing first and as I wait I say, “You were really good tonight. I mean, you were good in rehearsal, b-but tonight was…even better.”

She smiles as she finishes tying the bow on her uniform, “Thanks. You too. It’s the adrenaline I think. I think we all did…so well. It was our best performance yet. Perfect time, too.” She takes a deep breath, as she makes sure her uniform looks right in the mirror, “Now I have to do something else even more nerve-wracking.”

“So, you're going to tell him tonight for sure?”

She nods, “Yep. Just like I told you and Akane. No more excuses.” She smiles, “You know, tonight I realized that I’m kind of doing what Mitsue was in the play. Not letting myself be happy because of something bad that happened to me.”

She hugs me, “And just like in the play, you helped me realize that was silly. So thank you.”

I smile as I hug her back, “You’re welcome.”

The two of us leave our changing room to find Daiki and Ken waiting for us. Both of them are smiling too. After congratulating one another, we head out into the lobby.

When we all get there, I'm surprised to see many people are still in the lobby. They all applaud us when we come out. I recognize many of the faces, including my parents and Mr. Suzuki, but I didn't expect this many people to still be here with the festival going on. I thought they would go outside to join the festivities.

Before I have time to really look around the crowd, I’m suddenly wrapped up in a tight hug.

“You were soooo good! That was the best play ever! I should have brought flowers. You deserve them way more than Chiyo.”

I laugh, “Th-thank you, Akane.”

When she releases me from the hug I notice that she's with Misha and Shizune.

Misha has a big smile for me as she signs and speaks at the same time, “It really was good! Shicchan even cried!”

Shizune glares at Misha and starts signing, “Shicchan says she…only had a tear or two, that's not the same as crying!” Then she turns to me and continues signing and this time Akane translates, “It really was very good. I was a little nervous having this be part of the festival, but now I'm very glad we did!”

I smile, “Thank you. I'm glad you both enjoyed it.”

Shizune nods and Misha says, “We're off to check on some other festival stuff. See you later!”

After those two head out, I'm able to get my bearings a little. I see Daiki talking to his parents and Ken and Chiyo talking to an older man. Probably the director of the acting troupe.

Then, I locate my parents. My dad looks like he wants to dash over here, but my mom has his arm tightly looped with hers and is patting him on the hand. It's like she’s trying to calm down a young child and telling him to wait his turn. I’m thankful she is, because it would have been embarrassing if he ran over here with his usual level of excitement.

With a smile I turn to Akane and say, “Want to meet my parents?”

She nods with a big smile on her face.

As I start to walk across the lobby to see them, Akane says, “Hold on.” And goes off somewhere. I stop and watch her to see where she's going. Then I see a familiar tall blond girl on the other side of the lobby. She’s using her cane to feel around, but looks very uncertain.

Akane says something to her and Lilly takes her arm and they return to me.

“H-hi Lilly. Thank you for coming.”

Lilly says, “I’m happy I did. You were wonderful, Nagisa. Your voice was so different that for a moment I was very confused! My apologies for not coming to congratulate you sooner, but with all the people in here I wasn't sure I would find you. I’m glad Akane saw me, I was about to give up.”

“I-I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

She nods and smiles, “I’d like to talk to you more about it some time. But for now, I should probably retreat.”

I smile, “Okay. I’ll come see you at lunch soon.”

She nods, “I’d like that.”

Then Akane leads Lilly to the exit before rejoining me, and we walk towards my parents.

Once we’re close enough, my dad breaks free from my mom and wraps me in a hug much like Akane did. He sounds surprisingly calm and serious when he says, “You were absolutely incredible.” He let's me go and then my mom hugs me too and says, “I’m so happy for you.”

I smile at her, “I-I’m happy too. It was fun and…really amazing.” I gesture towards Akane, “I want you both to meet Akane, she’s my best friend I’ve told you about.”

Akane suddenly gets very stiff and bows her head, “I-it's very nice to meet you both, Mr. and Mrs. Furukawa.”

My dad responds, “IT'S VERY NICE TO MEET YOU TOO!”

Well, at least she knows she doesn't need to be so formal now.

Akane flinches as my dad yells in her face, but she somehow manages to keep smiling.

“Dad…you don’t have to do that. Just talk normally.”

“But I thought you said-”

Akane steps in and taps on her ear piece, “I'm deaf, but when I have these on I'm…basically not.”

My dad narrows his eyes and nods, “Ohhhh.”

My mom smiles at Akane, “Would you like to come with us to the festival? I’d like to get to know my daughter’s best friend a little.”

Akane nods eagerly.

“You don't have to work the booth some more?”

Akane shakes her head, “Madoka said she’d cover for me, surprisingly enough. She…even said I should spend time with you at the festival. Seemed a little weird, but who am I to argue?”

“Oh, that's great!”

Just as the four of us are leaving the performing arts center, I hear, “Hey Nagisa, wait!”

Akane and my parents stop and so do I. I turn around to see Chiyo and Ken with the older man that I saw earlier.

Chiyo smiles, “This is…Mr. Fujita. From the acting troupe in Tokyo. He wanted to meet you.”

He nods, “Hello Ms. Furukawa. I really enjoyed your performance tonight. I was absolutely captivated. I was shocked when these two told me it was your first play.”

I feel my face flush, “O-Oh. Um…thank you, sir.”

I’ve gotten a lot of praise tonight. But I know for sure that this man isn't just my friend or my parents telling me I did a good job.

My dad claps his hand on my shoulder, “It's in her blood! I used to be an actor.”

Mr. Fujita nods, “I see. That certainly helps.”

“Are you interested in her for your troupe?”

“D-dad, that's not-”

Mr. Fujita smiles, “As a matter of fact, I am.” He pulls out a business card and hands it to me, “I don't want to interrupt your family time at the festival, but give me a call sometime if you’re interested.”

I nod, “O-oh. Um…okay. Th-thank you, sir.”

He nods and then goes off with Ken and Chiyo. Chiyo shoots me a big smile and a thumbs up as they leave. I think it has more than one meaning.

…

We just finished eating some really good yakisoba at the fair. Once my dad is finished, he gets up from our table and runs over to the game booths and yells, “Nagisa! Come watch your dad win you a stuffed animal!”

Akane laughs and whispers, “Does…your dad think he's on a date with you?”

I sigh, “Kind of. We are very close and…sometimes he gets kind of needy like this. It’s…not as weird as it sounds.”

Akane giggles, “If you say so.”

My mom, who I didn't know could hear us laughs, and says, “It's a little weird. But I suppose we should humor him. He’s been such a good boy so far.”

All three of us start giggling as we throw our trash away as my dad impatiently bounces up and down in front of one of the game booths.

When we get closer I see that he’s settled in front of a booth where you throw balls at little figures. The more you knock down, the bigger stuffed animal you get. My dad is staring into the booth with a serious glint in his eye, “I'm going to get you that big stuffed cat. I promise. You deserve it after your play.”

I notice Akane grinning and say, “Dad…why don't you try to win one for mom instead?”

My dad frowns, “But I always win you something at fairs.”

“I…I know but-”

My mom chimes in, “Nagisa, I don’t mind. Don't you want that cat?”

Akane looks like she's barely holding a laugh in as I feel embarrassed. But I sigh and say, “Yes.”

This makes both of my parents smile, while Akane giggles at my embarrassment.

I do kind of want him to win me one. Maybe I'm weird too. I hope Akane doesn't think I am, though.

My thoughts must have been on my face. Akane nudges me, “Hey, it’s cute you guys are so close. You know cuteness makes me laugh sometimes - like with the dango song. I didn't mean to make you feel embarrassed.”

“Th-thanks.”

Akane, my mom and I watch as my dad loosens up his arm like he does before playing baseball. Then he dramatically slams a 100 yen coin on the booth counter. The poor student running the booth awkwardly takes the coin and gives my dad three balls.

My mom cheers, “You can do it, Akio!”

My dad confidently looks at the three of us, “I have three beautiful women watching and cheering me on. I can't let any of you down.”

My mom and I are used to this kind of thing, but Akane isn't. She blushes and looks away from him, making me smile.

My mom and I also aren't surprised when my dad knocks a figure over with all three of his throws. My mom and I cheer for him, but Akane sounds truly amazed when she says, “Whoaaa!”

My dad hands me the stuffed cat and smirks at Akane, “Impressed?”

Akane laughs, “Yeah, kind of. But I bet you can't do it again.”

“Tch. I can, and I will. I'll win you a cat this time!”

Sure enough, my dad goes through the same routine, handing Akane a cat this time. Akane smiles at him, “Thank you. But…now you have to do it for your wife.”

He turns to my mom and points at her dramatically, “Sanae! It's your turn!”

My mom claps and smiles at him, before my dad quickly wins another prize.

…

My dad has played just about every game at the fair and at this point, we have more prizes than we can carry. We each have our plush cat from the ball game, as well as costume jewelry bracelets, yo-yos, and a box of sparklers.

However, there's still one game booth I want to visit.
“What about this one, dad?”

He scoffs, “The goldfish game? That's for babies.”

Akane laughs, “And what, ring toss was really manly?”

The two of them have been having silly banter all night. It's been fun to watch. I'm glad she gets my dad's weird sense of humor.

My dad narrows his eyes at her, “It is manly, because I won prizes for my women. There's nothing manlier!”

Akane snorts, “Please don't tell me you're including me as one of your women.”

My dad grins, “Well, if you're not one of them, I'll take your prizes back.”

Akane turns away from him and clutches them to her chest, “No! They're mine!”

My mom smiles at her and cheerfully says, “Then no complaining, dear!”

I laugh at this whole exchange and say, “I don't really want you to play. But our friend is here, and I wanted to say hello.”

Akane turns around and says, “Oh yeah! Saki.” She shoves her prizes into my dad’s arms and says, “Hold these for me.”

I follow suit, leaving my dad looking stunned and a little sad.

As we approach the booth, we see that there aren't many fish left. Just as I'm thinking Saki might have already left, I see her sitting in a chair behind the water tank. When she hears us she looks up with a fake looking smile, which turns into a real smile when she realizes it’s us.

“Oh, hey! Here for some fish?”

I shake my head, “We have too many prizes as it is. I just wanted to come say hello.”

She nods, “Hey, your play was pretty amazing. I had super high expectations too, and I was still blown away.”

Akane pats me on the head, “I know, right? And she was the star!”

Saki laughs, “Yep, you were really amazing. I’m pretty sure half the auditorium was crying during that last scene.”

I smile, “Th-thank you. I guess we both had a good day performing.”

Saki smiles and nods, “I’m really glad our bodies didn't let us down today.”

…

After we talked to Saki, there was an announcement that the fireworks were going to start. My parents, Akane, and I had fun watching all the different colors and we lit some of the sparklers my dad won us.

We just saw my parents off at the front gate. They are staying in a hotel at the bottom of the hill. They leave tomorrow, unfortunately. But we’re meeting them for breakfast at The Shanghai tomorrow morning before they leave.

Akane and I are walking back to the dorms with our prizes in our arms. Even though she teased us all about it, she seems pretty happy my dad won her a plush too. And all of her other prizes.

As she squeezes her stuffed cat to her chest with a smile she says, “I can see how you ended up so nice. They barely know me and made me feel like family.”

I laugh, “My dad is pretty silly though. It's embarrassing.”

Akane laughs, “That’s true. But it comes from a place of love, I think. So it's okay. It certainly makes him fun to be around.”

I nod and smile, “You’re right.”

As Akane and I get to our hall, I see something I've never seen before. Someone is sitting down next to my door. I think I know who that someone is, but I hope I'm wrong. I look at Akane, who I can tell is thinking the same thing.

When we get close enough, our fears are realized. Chiyo is sitting next to my door with her knees pulled to her chest and her arms wrapped around them.

Akane manages to say something first, “Ch-Chiyo?”

She looks up at us, and I flinch. Her face is tear-stained and she looks furious. She clenches her fists and stands up. Akane drops all of her prizes and gets between me and Chiyo with her arms outstretched. I don't understand why.

Through gritted teeth Chiyo says, “H-he… rejected me and told me we can't be friends. So… thanks for ruining my life! Y-you’re such good friends!”

Akane replies, “I-I'm sorry, Chiyo.”

Chiyo takes a step closer to Akane and with a shaky voice she says, “Shut up! I don't want your pity! It's your fault! I bet you wanted it to happen like this, you…you bitch!”

Just as she says the last word, she slaps Akane so hard that she grunts in pain and part of her hearing equipment flies off and hits my door.

Chiyo really put her body into it, so she loses her balance and falls towards Akane, who catches her and pulls her into a hug.

Chiyo struggles to get free of her grip, “L-let me go!”

But Akane doesn't listen. After struggling a little bit longer, Chiyo puts her arms around Akane and rests her head on her shoulder. She starts to sob. Just like she did earlier tonight, in the last scene of the play. Only this time it's real.

All of it happened so fast that I haven't moved. Now that it's clear it is what she needs, I walk around and hug Chiyo from behind.

This was such a great day.

But now one of the worst possible things has happened. One of my best friends had her heart broken. And Akane and I made it happen.

Damn, now I wanna read this play.

Always happy to see Nagisa's parents, and I'm happy that the director liked her enough to give her his business card. Saki and Nagisa's moment of solidarity was nice too~

Sucks for Chiyo, but I've read enough of your fics to know there's probably some secret reason Ken rejected her. And it's not like he's had much development yet either, so this feels like a convenient segue.

MagicalMelancholy wrote: ↑Sun Sep 22, 2024 9:27 pm

Damn, now I wanna read this play.

It's a good one. Early on when I was planning this story out, I remembered reading that play and read it again. And I realized it was perfect in so many ways. It made me think of Hanako most of all - for obvious reasons. It was nice writing her reacting to the play, because it really would be deeply personal for someone like her. And in a lot of ways, she goes through the same thing as Mitsue (Chiyo's character). Survivor's guilt and retreating into depression and even shunning romance to a degree (especially if you consider Sisterhood canon).