Hanako's Broken Heart Club

[Pyramid Head]

You don't need to even turn on the food network and scroll through crap by Bobby Flay to find the good cooking shows. The Food Network website keeps track of recipes fairly well and several YouTube channels post full episodes of Good Eats, though you may need headphones if you go that route because some of them were posted by a user who never heard of audio amplification.

Plus, while i can't cook in my current predicament i actually have attended a few cooking classes and still study it and can provide cooking instructions to anyone who needs it if you just request a recipe and send a PM.

[Beoran]

Or if you don't want to waste time watching TV, BBC had a very extensive web site full of recipes:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/

They may not all be healthy but with 14k+ recipes it's easy to choose.
I myself can cook, but not as good as my wife. I'll have to admit at using frozen or canned vegetables at time,
but for stuff like green beans of spinach, they're far more convenient than the fresh ones. And if
it's frozen, then the nutrition is almost as good as fresh, sometimes even better if the "fresh" product
isn't really very fresh. Anyway, try to eat in moderation and healthy enough food, and it will be good for you.
And don't punch at walls. That's bad for your health too. :p

[Pyramid Head]

Or if you don't want to waste time watching TV, BBC had a very extensive web site full of recipes:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/

They may not all be healthy but with 14k+ recipes it's easy to choose.
I myself can cook, but not as good as my wife. I'll have to admit at using frozen or canned vegetables at time,
but for stuff like green beans of spinach, they're far more convenient than the fresh ones. And if
it's frozen, then the nutrition is almost as good as fresh, sometimes even better if the "fresh" product
isn't really very fresh. Anyway, try to eat in moderation and healthy enough food, and it will be good for you.
And don't punch at walls. That's bad for your health too. :p

Actually funnily enough in my opinion, frozen peas can be better than fresh peas because they begin to drop in quality at a rapid rate. Though while you were correct in mentioning it's sometimes okay to use frozen produce since if the freezing process works fast enough there's not too much cell damage and the nutrition is still there, i should warn that some foods like broccoli do lose flavor and nutrition when microwaved or boiled. Sometimes you just need to either make the time to cook food properly or use a cheating cooking method where you just steam it in a pouch, when you use that method the steam keeps the food from burning or drying out if you lose track of time and it's a good way to handle fish if you're not particularly gifted with a knife.

[Xiious]

Cooking rules.

Stay the fuck away from hot dogs, kids. Even the all-beef ones are loaded with nitrates and sodium. HBHC, if you want to avoid a legit "broken heart," learn how to cook well, and learn how to eat well. They go hand in hand, and you guys with mental/emotional hang-ups will realize that simply having a better diet and preparing your meals instead of going out or relying on the ol' nuker will do WONDERS for depression, fatigue, hopelessness, and general malaise.

Of course, I typically eat once every one and a half days and drink WAY too much, so take it with a grain of salt. But just a grain. Gotta watch that hypertension.

Practicing what you preach is one of the hardest things anyone can do.

Update:
I wrote a letter, just a small apology one, and mailed it off. So old school, but it gives them a few more days before they get it to cool off. As for me, I finished Muv Luv Extra and Unlimited a few days ago ad had started Alternative.

Right now, I'm at the part right after Captain Isumi gave her life by manually self-destructing the Susano'o. I never thought something could make me cry more than Katawa Shoujo, but Alternative has done just that....as well as that I know there's gonna be even more tear-inducing things that are gonna happen.

[Camoufrage]

First time actually asking for advise from this thread since I first got on here but I definitely am in a tight spot I can't necessarily tell anyone IRL about till I know for sure what I'm going to do about this predicament I'm in.

This is my second year out of my family's grasp and been hundreds of miles away from them for the most part. I still visit them every year around this time for about two weeks in order to catch up and not seem like I'm trying to avoid them.

But that's hardly the point. I have no laptop so this year I have been borrowing my fathers and using it for whatever I need it for. My dad is married to his second wife who we all love dearly, and she is 9 months pregnant. His last wife, my mom, he had a divorce with years ago.

Anyway so about two days ago I was browsing my dads computer and doing whatever when I found some pretty awful shit. Apparently my dad has been banging his assistant at his business and been kind enough to take pictures and save them on his work computer. I saw this stuff and nearly flipped shit.

He lost his last wife due to cheating, but this is on a whole other level. He had folders of him with different women nicely dated with the past few weeks. Now he's got another kid on the way, and my sister who is in her last year of high school. We have had the same dynamic for years, and this will destroy everything, and undoubtedly split our whole family in three.

But I am so confused as to what I should do with the situation. I'm the only one in my family that knows he is cheating, and I don't know if I should let it out. If I do we will have a kid that has a divorced family and a sister that is completely broken and may give up on school or do worse because she's destroyed by the fact our dad cheated again and ruined everything we had (mind you this girl is Harvard quality, smartest person I've met in my life). But if he just continues doin what he is doing even worse things might happen and I will regret it for the rest of my life.

Its also not easy keeping myself from just doing something stupid and possibly hurting my dad. The little bastard is three quarters of an inch from ruining multiple peoples lives in a snap, and isn't even phased by it. I nearly broke his 5000 dollar work laptop when I found the files, and its been so hard to keep this from everyone and act like everything is dandy. Friggin infuriating and I have to sleep in the same room as my dad until Tuesday when I can use my plane ticket to leave this place.

So I don't know what to do with the situation. I wish I could get a few minutes to think about the situation but I can't, my heads been spinning and I am basically in a blind rage. It has been interfering with the way I act everywhere, including here, because I'm just so pissed at my dad and so pissed at myself for not knowing what to do. I mean, if I tell his wife there goes a family that could have happened and the baby will have a hard divorced life. But she should know what he is doing, and keeping it from her seems like it would be a crime. At the same time my sister would break, I know it. She could possibly do something stupid because of it.

In the end, my dad is a piece of shit for this and has ruined our family and his and my relationship forever. People are assholes and all they do is screw things up.

God I never want a relationship again, all it ever does is corrupt people and break others hearts. I wish it didn't exist.

[Kutagh]

First time actually asking for advise from this thread since I first got on here but I definitely am in a tight spot I can't necessarily tell anyone IRL about till I know for sure what I'm going to do about this predicament I'm in.

This is my second year out of my family's grasp and been hundreds of miles away from them for the most part. I still visit them every year around this time for about two weeks in order to catch up and not seem like I'm trying to avoid them.

But that's hardly the point. I have no laptop so this year I have been borrowing my fathers and using it for whatever I need it for. My dad is married to his second wife who we all love dearly, and she is 9 months pregnant. His last wife, my mom, he had a divorce with years ago.

Anyway so about two days ago I was browsing my dads computer and doing whatever when I found some pretty awful shit. Apparently my dad has been banging his assistant at his business and been kind enough to take pictures and save them on his work computer. I saw this stuff and nearly flipped shit.

He lost his last wife due to cheating, but this is on a whole other level. He had folders of him with different women nicely dated with the past few weeks. Now he's got another kid on the way, and my sister who is in her last year of high school. We have had the same dynamic for years, and this will destroy everything, and undoubtedly split our whole family in three.

But I am so confused as to what I should do with the situation. I'm the only one in my family that knows he is cheating, and I don't know if I should let it out. If I do we will have a kid that has a divorced family and a sister that is completely broken and may give up on school or do worse because she's destroyed by the fact our dad cheated again and ruined everything we had (mind you this girl is Harvard quality, smartest person I've met in my life). But if he just continues doin what he is doing even worse things might happen and I will regret it for the rest of my life.

Its also not easy keeping myself from just doing something stupid and possibly hurting my dad. The little bastard is three quarters of an inch from ruining multiple peoples lives in a snap, and isn't even phased by it. I nearly broke his 5000 dollar work laptop when I found the files, and its been so hard to keep this from everyone and act like everything is dandy. Friggin infuriating and I have to sleep in the same room as my dad until Tuesday when I can use my plane ticket to leave this place.

So I don't know what to do with the situation. I wish I could get a few minutes to think about the situation but I can't, my heads been spinning and I am basically in a blind rage. It has been interfering with the way I act everywhere, including here, because I'm just so pissed at my dad and so pissed at myself for not knowing what to do. I mean, if I tell his wife there goes a family that could have happened and the baby will have a hard divorced life. But she should know what he is doing, and keeping it from her seems like it would be a crime. At the same time my sister would break, I know it. She could possibly do something stupid because of it.

In the end, my dad is a piece of shit for this and has ruined our family and his and my relationship forever. People are assholes and all they do is screw things up.

God I never want a relationship again, all it ever does is corrupt people and break others hearts. I wish it didn't exist.

The only thing that I can say is: If he continues, sooner or later his wife will find out and your family will snap into pieces anyway, even if you didn't say anything. However, if you haven't said anything then the rest of the family might become furious with you. On the other hand, they might become furious as well if you do say something.
However, you haven't mentioned talking quietly with him first, setting him an ultimatum: Stop doing that shit or you'll let his wife know. Show him you're angry about it and that you will break off all contact with him if he keeps cheating on his wife. If he listens, there is still a chance that the family can still be whole.

In any case, this situation sucks and I hope that it gets resolved quickly.

[Xanatos]

God I never want a relationship again, all it ever does is corrupt people and break others hearts. I wish it didn't exist.

Doesn't sound like it's corrupted everyone, just him. Don't let some asshole color your perspective too much. It'll ruin ya. (Disclaimer: I'm an asshole, but I'm okay to listen to.)

Let it out but make sure the timing is right. It certainly can't do any good keeping it hidden as that would only enable the guy. A family with someone like that is no family at all and it would only make things far worse if it were uncovered late down the line. Living in a divorced family isn't typically as hard as it's made out to be either. As for the sister, you said she's a smart girl. Harvard material. It'll do some damage but she sounds like she's equipped to overcome it.

I'd say gather your thoughts and how you'll tell it then get them all together and do just that. Speaking for myself, I'd rather have a damaged/divorced family than one built on a foundation of bullshit. He's like a tumor in otherwise healthy tissue. They'll all be better off in the end for having removed him.

I'll have to disagree with Kutagh on the ultimatum strategy: He's already done the damage. With MULTIPLE women. And in the past as well, judging from your story. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice..." You get the idea. He can't be redeemed. And if he agrees to quit, you know what? He'll likely start up again once you're away or just quit saving pictures of it. Expose him, cut him loose. It's like a lump of cancer: The surgery to remove it may hurt like hell but just leave it be and the host (family) will die anyway in time.

Sounds like a shitty situation overall but keeping quiet will only let him continue that crap. You said you all dearly love the woman he's with now...So I'd say she deserves to know.

[Total Destruction]

HOLY SHIT.

I literally cannot help you here, but I've got a feeling that wasn't the primary intent. But GODDAMN that is awful, and to be in your situation SUCKS. We could swap stories about being exactly in this kinda situation and what I did about it, but that was a million years ago, and I've never done anything right in my life until recently. That's why I give such good advice.

Jesus.

Keep us posted, yeah? This is NUTS. Best of to you and yours.

[Camoufrage]

@Kutagh and @Xanatos
Easier said than done obviously. Talking to my family about how he banged women and took pictures of it while his wife (an amazing one at that) has been pregnant with their baby girl. Yeah that's not very easy. And yes my sister is smart, but the smallest thing will destroy her. Tell her she may have to go to a community college and she starts crying for hours. Who knows what She would do when her best friend (my dads second wife) leaves them because he's a piece of shit.

@Total Destruction
Sorry to say but I dont think I'll be telling stories about thus to people for quite a while. This is too much for me to handle, really. But thanks a ton for the support.

[Pseudogenesis]

First time actually asking for advise from this thread since I first got on here but I definitely am in a tight spot I can't necessarily tell anyone IRL about till I know for sure what I'm going to do about this predicament I'm in.

This is my second year out of my family's grasp and been hundreds of miles away from them for the most part. I still visit them every year around this time for about two weeks in order to catch up and not seem like I'm trying to avoid them.

But that's hardly the point. I have no laptop so this year I have been borrowing my fathers and using it for whatever I need it for. My dad is married to his second wife who we all love dearly, and she is 9 months pregnant. His last wife, my mom, he had a divorce with years ago.

Anyway so about two days ago I was browsing my dads computer and doing whatever when I found some pretty awful shit. Apparently my dad has been banging his assistant at his business and been kind enough to take pictures and save them on his work computer. I saw this stuff and nearly flipped shit.

He lost his last wife due to cheating, but this is on a whole other level. He had folders of him with different women nicely dated with the past few weeks. Now he's got another kid on the way, and my sister who is in her last year of high school. We have had the same dynamic for years, and this will destroy everything, and undoubtedly split our whole family in three.

But I am so confused as to what I should do with the situation. I'm the only one in my family that knows he is cheating, and I don't know if I should let it out. If I do we will have a kid that has a divorced family and a sister that is completely broken and may give up on school or do worse because she's destroyed by the fact our dad cheated again and ruined everything we had (mind you this girl is Harvard quality, smartest person I've met in my life). But if he just continues doin what he is doing even worse things might happen and I will regret it for the rest of my life.

Its also not easy keeping myself from just doing something stupid and possibly hurting my dad. The little bastard is three quarters of an inch from ruining multiple peoples lives in a snap, and isn't even phased by it. I nearly broke his 5000 dollar work laptop when I found the files, and its been so hard to keep this from everyone and act like everything is dandy. Friggin infuriating and I have to sleep in the same room as my dad until Tuesday when I can use my plane ticket to leave this place.

So I don't know what to do with the situation. I wish I could get a few minutes to think about the situation but I can't, my heads been spinning and I am basically in a blind rage. It has been interfering with the way I act everywhere, including here, because I'm just so pissed at my dad and so pissed at myself for not knowing what to do. I mean, if I tell his wife there goes a family that could have happened and the baby will have a hard divorced life. But she should know what he is doing, and keeping it from her seems like it would be a crime. At the same time my sister would break, I know it. She could possibly do something stupid because of it.

In the end, my dad is a piece of shit for this and has ruined our family and his and my relationship forever. People are assholes and all they do is screw things up.

God I never want a relationship again, all it ever does is corrupt people and break others hearts. I wish it didn't exist.

First of all, check the dates the pictures were created before you do anything rash. They may be from before he was with his second wife. (It's a longshot, but take it.)

[Xanatos]

@Kutagh and @Xanatos
Easier said than done obviously. Talking to my family about how he banged women and took pictures of it while his wife (an amazing one at that) has been pregnant with their baby girl. Yeah that's not very easy. And yes my sister is smart, but the smallest thing will destroy her. Tell her she may have to go to a community college and she starts crying for hours. Who knows what She would do when her best friend (my dads second wife) leaves them because he's a piece of shit.

Most things are. But I'd still say they have a right to know what sort of...Creature...He is. I'm generally detached from everyone though, in addition to a rudimentary sense of family, so delivering bad news is simpler for me.

Whatever you decide, you've got support here. I

[Camoufrage]

@Pseudo
I said in the post they were dated: May-July 2012 all of them mostly with an assistant he's had for a month with a $1000 camera he bought last month, something tells me he and that slut had things planned out. They've been married 5 years

@Xanatos
Thanks man. I have no problem tearing my dad apart, just the rest of my family.

[Xanatos]

@Pseudo
I said in the post they were dated: May-July 2012 all of them mostly with an assistant he's had for a month with a $1000 camera he bought last month, something tells me he and that slut had things planned out. They've been married 5 years

@Xanatos
Thanks man. I have no problem tearing my dad apart, just the rest of my family.

Living a lie is easier but it's rarely worth it. The family can stay whole but founded on ignorance and some prick's BS ways, or be torn apart and heal as it may. Tears are inevitable but easier to handle if there are people there for support. Ignorance is bliss but I'd rather have turmoil if it means the truth. Ideally, you could expose it then manage to snag an ideal scenario: He's coerced by the whole family to quit that crap, and it remains together. If he gives a damn at all, he'd give it up when faced with that, and second chances aren't unheard of...But ideals are difficult to realize. Possible...But difficult.

Tough call, all things considered. Sleep on it.

If you need to vent further, this place is always here.

[Walrusfella]

Good Lord, Camoufrage, what an awful situation. When I read that I instantly remembered the rage and guilt and confusion you must be feeling.

I've been in a similar situation with my own father, though not with horrible pictures. I was 8 or 9. We went out for dinner in another town with someone he introduced as a friend. I later saw them making out when they thought I was elsewhere. I knew it was very wrong but I didn't know what to do. I ended up not doing or saying anything. My mother found out about her or one of the other ones and they divorced when I was 12. I felt guilty and ashamed for years afterward about my inaction until I arrived at the truth; I was a little kid and he put me in a situation I never should have been in. It wasn't my fault, it was all his.

I've never told anybody about that, not even my wife. My father and I get on okay now, but it's more like he's an older friend than my dad.

I can't presume to tell you what you should do. I never reached a conclusion myself. Whatever you decide, the effects this has on your family are not because of you. The sin is his and his alone. It is possible to have a good relationship of your own without any of that kind of betrayal. That crap isn't hereditary.

Good luck Camoufrage. I'm going to go pour a double scotch, then another for you.

[Camoufrage]

@Walrusfella
Then drink it for me would ya? Don't want to waste scotch after all? Well I'm much older than 8 or 9 so I have better idea of how to deal with this situation, but I'm pretty much stumped at this point nonetheless.

So if I do tell the wife I should probably wait till after the baby? So she doesn't loose the will to live during the process or something like that?