Reconciliation - (a Hanako bad-end story)

[Robnonymous]

Thanks for pointing those out. I'm not entirely sure how I missed "handsome" like that.

[Mirage_GSM]

Somehow I knew why Lilly was calling as soon as Hanako recognized her voice...
Great chapter! Do go on.

[Robnonymous]

• Pt 1 - Reconciliation
  Pt 2 - The Hotel Room
  Pt 3 - Bad Connection
  Pt 4 - Flight
  Pt 5 - Arrival
  Pt 6 - Reunion
  Pt 7 - Letting Go
  Pt 8 - Breakdown
  Pt 9 - Departure
  Epilogue - Checkmate

“Oh my gosh… Ohmygosh!! You’re Hanako Ikezawa, aren’t you?”

I give the flight attendant a smile and a brief nod without saying anything.

“OHMYGOSH!! I’m a HUGE fan of your work!”

It’s SO not the time for this…

“Well… thank you. I always enjoy meeting a fan,” I reply, careful to keep my voice down. This is supposed to be an 18-hour flight, and the fewer people I have asking me about my inspiration and whatnot the better.

My inspiration is dead.

No, I’m not going down that road again. Not now. I’ll have plenty of time to get hysterical in the restroom once we’re in the air but I’ve got to keep it together until then.

The flight attendant shows me to my seat, a huge grin plastered on her face the whole time.

“If you need anything – I mean ANYTHING – Ms. Ikezawa, don’t hesitate to ask for Julia.”

She’s sweet in that over-excited puppy kind of way.

“Thanks, Julia,” I say as I give her a more genuine smile. She trots off, looking like she’s either going to explode or pass out.

“Americans… I get it, it’s a cultural thing, but you’d think she’d be able to keep it a bit more professional.”

I look to my left just as Sho flops into the seat next to me. I can’t tell if he’s honestly annoyed or just trying to lighten the mood.

“Oh come on, she was nice,” I argue, “A little excitable maybe but it was sincere.”

“I’m sorry,” he sighs, removes his glasses with one hand and rubs his eyes with the other, “I’m just tired.”

He freezes, “I… uh… I mean… God, I’m sorry.”

I nod, “It’s okay, really. I wish I didn’t have to spring this on you at the last possible second.”

He shakes his head but I don’t give him time to interject.

“This really means a lot to me, Sho. Honestly, thank you. Although you didn’t have to come along.”

“Hey,” he puts his glasses back on and smiles, “I go where you go, remember? I’m your shadow. It’s part of my contract.”

His smile disappears, “Besides, how could I let you go off and face this alone?”

Oh here we go…

“Sho, I don’t need-“

“No, Hanako, hear me out. Please. Just this once.”

I shut up.

“In all the years we’ve known each other I’ve NEVER seen you take anything this hard. I know there’s a lot about yourself that you won’t tell me, and I’m fine with that. It’s your business. But I know this friend-“

“Former friend.”

Best friend. And my first love.

“- former friend meant a lot to you. Enough so that you’re willing to drop everything in the middle of a book tour, fly out to Scotland and attend his funeral. You’re probably already going through hell and it’s probably going to get worse.”

Bingo.

He turns his head and looks straight into my eyes, “I’m NOT going to let you do it alone. Like it or not, I’m here. For you. If that pisses you off then that’s too bad. You can fire me once we get back.”

I don’t know whether to laugh, cry, or punch him in the mouth. So I turn to look out the window for a second while I figure it out. The ground crew is scrambling away from the plane as I hear the luggage compartment doors lock. It’s almost time. I turn back and he’s still looking at me.

“Thank you,” is all I can say.

Despite my original intentions, I stay in my seat once we hit our cruising altitude. Now that I’ve made it through the initial shock of Hisao’s passing I’m doing a little better. There’s still an immense amount of regret and sadness swirling around inside my head, but most of the despair is gone. Either that or I’m just in shock.

Once I get to Inverness, though, it’s going to get ugly again.

Yes, it is. I can’t kid myself into thinking that I’m going to put on a brave face for Sho or Lilly or anyone else. I’ll probably turn into a sobbing wreck of a human being, but I’ve still got another seventeen hours or so before I have to worry about that. Best to try and get some sleep in the mean time.

But what if I dream?

Well, what if I do? It’s bound to happen sooner or later anyway and I can’t just not sleep.

I lean back in my chair and turn away from the window. Sho’s already fast asleep, the most recent draft of my work-in-progress clenched in his hand. I smile to myself.

Besides, I’m not alone anymore.

I close my eyes.

----------

“Hanako.”

Leave me alone.

“Hanako!”

I didn’t mean to!

“Hanako, wake up!”

Little by little, my senses start to function again. I can feel someone shaking me. My left hand is sore. I can hear some kind of faint humming noise. When I open my eyes, I can’t remember where I am.

I’m on an airplane.

Right. I must’ve fallen asleep. Had a dream. I look over to see Sho’s hand on my shoulder. When he sees that I’m awake he stops shaking me, but he doesn’t move his hand. He looks concerned. Almost scared. I look down.

No wonder my hand hurts.

I’ve got his hand in some kind of death grip. His fingertips are almost purple. My knuckles are completely white. I let go. He winces and flexes a bit. I can feel pins and needles starting to poke my fingers as my blood starts flowing again.

“I-I…” I stammer, still not entirely awake, “I’m sorry. Are you o-okay?”

He bends each of his fingers to make sure they’re working properly and gives me a small nod. I wish I could tell what he’s thinking now. Actually on second thought, I don’t think I want to know.

He probably thinks I’m crazy.

“You were having a nightmare, I think,” is all he says at first.

Was I? I don’t remember anything. He must be right, though. If it was bad enough for me to clamp down on his hand like that it must have been awful. He must see my confusion written all over my face because his expression softens a bit.

“Are YOU okay?”

I have to think about that for a minute. Am I actually okay? Well, as okay as I can be right now? I think I am and I tell him as much. He gives a strained smile and nods.

“Good. We should be touching down in about an hour, so you might want to stay awake. I mean how often will you have the chance to see Scotland from the air in the middle of the night?”

The man has a point.

“I suppose so. But first,” I give a little stretch and stand up, “I have to pee.”

He shifts a little to give me room to pass, then turns to watch me go. As I get to the door I smile back at him and mouth the words “I’m fine” before going in. And the thing is, I am fine. I’m nervous as hell about what’s going to happen when I see Lilly again and I’m already dreading the funeral – Woah there, best not to get too far ahead of myself – but I’m actually doing okay.

I exit the restroom and walk back to my seat. I give Julia a little wave when I notice her looking in my direction and her face turns bright red. To her credit she waves right back without hesitation.

I like her. She’s adorable.

I plop down next to Sho and take a look out the window. It’s still too dark to see much so I look back to him. He’s trying really hard to hide his worrying, but he was never very good at that sort of thing. I give him a reassuring smile.

“I’m fine, really. I’ll probably be a total mess once… well, you know… but I’ll be okay.”

He puts his hand over mine and gives it a gentle squeeze. I return the gesture in kind.

“I know,” he replies.

We both watch through the tiny window as the Scottish countryside unrolls beneath us. And for the first time in years I remember what it feels like to have a real friend.

[CNB]

So what kind of books does Hanako write, that she's become (apparently) world-famous in the last handful of years?

[Specter Von Baren]

Despite my original intentions, I stay in my seat once we hit our cruising altitude. Now that I’m made it through the initial shock of Hisao’s passing I’m doing a little better. There’s still an immense amount of regret and sadness swirling around inside my head, but most of the despair is gone. Either that or I’m just in shock.

"Now that I'm made it" should be "Now that I've made it". Other than that, I didn't see any errors.

[Brogurt]

I think I am and I tell him as much.

This was odd. Was there some reason for a lack of dialogue?

[Robnonymous]

I think I am and I tell him as much.

This was odd. Was there some reason for a lack of dialogue?

Not really, just a personal preference thing.

"Now that I'm made it" should be "Now that I've made it".

Argh, totally missed that one. Thanks!

As for the books Hanako writes, I'm purposely keeping it vague. I figure everyone probably has their own idea of what kind of books she'd write (mystery, sci-fi, self-help, etc...) so this way we can all fill in our own blanks.

[Otakumon]

I think I am and I tell him as much.

This was odd. Was there some reason for a lack of dialogue?

Not really, just a personal preference thing.

"Now that I'm made it" should be "Now that I've made it".

Argh, totally missed that one. Thanks!

As for the books Hanako writes, I'm purposely keeping it vague. I figure everyone probably has their own idea of what kind of books she'd write (mystery, sci-fi, self-help, etc...) so this way we can all fill in our own blanks.

She wrote a series of books detailing the adventures of a boring young student that gains entrance to an exclusive school of science and his struggles to become the greatest scientist ever. The first movie is due out this summer and is called 'Henry Cobbler. Blinded me with Science!'.

[Acerus]

Great story, if a bit short (for my tastes at least). Are you planing anymore parts by chance?

[Robnonymous]

Thanks, and yup. I've still got more planned. I'm thinking it'll end up having another 2 or 3 parts before I'm finished.

[CNB]

Not really, just a personal preference thing.

Thought it worked reasonably well to show how far "out of it" she was at that particular moment.

[Robnonymous]

My apologies on breaking the "every other day" schedule that I've been attempting to stick to. Long story short, lack of sleep coupled with long hours at work make for not much time to write. Plus it's hard to make words read good when I'm exhausted. I do have the next part in the works, but it's not finished and will probably need some refinement before I post it. My ballpark guess is that I should have it done within another day or two. I hope you folks don't mind the wait too much.

[GibGabGoo]

My apologies on breaking the "every other day" schedule that I've been attempting to stick to. Long story short, lack of sleep coupled with long hours at work make for not much time to write. Plus it's hard to make words read good when I'm exhausted. I do have the next part in the works, but it's not finished and will probably need some refinement before I post it. My ballpark guess is that I should have it done within another day or two. I hope you folks don't mind the wait too much.

I'm sure everyone else is perfectly happy to wait, a late chapter that's been refined and polished is much better than an unpolished chapter that meets a deadline

[Brogurt]

I'm sure everyone else is perfectly happy to wait, a late chapter that's been refined and polished is much better than an unpolished chapter that meets a deadline

I'm all too familiar with this
Valentine's Day

[Robnonymous]

• Pt 1 - Reconciliation
  Pt 2 - The Hotel Room
  Pt 3 - Bad Connection
  Pt 4 - Flight
  Pt 5 - Arrival
  Pt 6 - Reunion
  Pt 7 - Letting Go
  Pt 8 - Breakdown
  Pt 9 - Departure
  Epilogue - Checkmate

We collect our things and slowly make our way toward the exit. I’ve never liked this part of flying. I just want to get off the plane, but it always takes forever for the people ahead of me to get their crap and go. I just want to get out of the aerodynamic tube filled with recycled air and stretch my legs. ESPECIALLY after spending so much time sitting down.

I see Sho tense up as we get closer to the door. It takes all of half a second for me to understand why.

Julia.

The flight attendant is making her customary goodbyes and hasn’t noticed us yet. I imagine Sho’s just waiting for her eyes to land on us. He probably expects her to flip out and make a scene. It’s happened before, sure, but I don’t think he’s giving her enough credit. She obviously knew enough not to disturb us during the flight, which is something I deeply appreciate. I feel like I need to thank her.

Lightbulb!

“Sho, would you hand me the draft you’ve been looking over?”

He starts to open his bag, then freezes.

“… Why?”

“I just want to check something,” I say with a slight smirk.

He sighs and digs it out for me. He gives it one last, almost forlorn look before finally handing it over.

“Thanks,” I smile, then pull out a pen and scribble a short message on the front before tucking it under my arm. Just as Julia spots me. And just like I expected, she keeps it together. When we get close enough for our own farewell I motion Sho on ahead and step to the side.

“It was a real pleasure meeting you, Miss Ikezawa,” she beams. Her face is beet red. I nod, smile and hand her the loosely bound stack of papers under my arm.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t have anything worthwhile to sign for you. I hope this is okay. I wanted to thank you for enjoying my books.”

She hesitates for a moment before reaching out, like she’s afraid it’ll bite. Her eyes jump from the offering in my hands up to my eyes and back again. I give her another smile and a nod.

“It’s okay, really.”

She carefully plucks the bundle from my hands, silently reads my message and gives me another huge grin. We say our goodbyes and I make my way into the connecting tunnel. Sho looks like he’s torn between being pissed off and genuinely touched. He opens his mouth to say something, but gets cut off by the sound of Julia finally realizing what I’d handed her. Whatever he’d planned to say is forgotten as he smiles and shakes his head.

“I’ll print another one out for you when we get back,” I assure him.

I step into the terminal with Sho close behind and take a quick look around. Things are pretty quiet, which strikes me as odd until I remember what time it is. At least the distinct lack of a major crowd should make our meeting a lot easier. Problem is, I don’t see anyone even remotely recognizable.

“Do you see her?” I ask as I turn back to Sho. He shrugs.

Hanako,” he chides, “I have no idea what any of these people look like, remember?”

Oops.

“Y-You’re right, Sho. I’m sorry,” I say as I turn back for another look. Still no luck.

“How about you try to give them a call?” he suggests. It makes sense. Then again, it’s ridiculously early in the morning. I’d hate to wake anyone up. Besides, I sent Lilly a quick text with our arrival time before we got on the plane. She knows we’re here.

So where is she, then?

Our area of the terminal is emptying out fairly quickly, but there are still a decent amount of friends and families catching sight of one another, hugging, laughing and so on. A short man with brown hair, a nice suit, and a handlebar mustache trots over to an old woman who exited behind us and gives her a quick hug. A beautiful Amazon of a woman, blonde hair falling past her shoulders and everything, waves at someone else getting off the plane. I catch myself wishing I had her confidence to wear a shirt cut that low. I’ve gotten a lot more confident with my body since high school – I could totally pull off wearing pants that tight. Already have, actually - but I still get nervous about showing too much skin.

I hear a sharp, rhythmic tapping and whip my head around. I feel excited and terrified at the same time. After so many years, will Lilly and I still have anything in common? Will we even get along?

Does she hate me?

My shoulders slump as I find the source of the noise. It’s just one of those weird electric vehicles they use in larger airports. Something sticky must be on one of its wheels. I glance back at my phone. It’s only been a few minutes. Maybe they got caught in traffic or are looking for a parking space right now. No need to get anxious, even though I totally am. A lot.

I nearly jump out of my skin when I feel a hand clamp down on my shoulder.

“Heya, kid!”

I look up to see the blonde woman again. Her cleavage is out in full force and a big grin is plastered on her face. I know it’s not out of the question to have some fans in Scotland, but I wouldn’t have expected them to be so direct. Even Julia addressed me by my full-

Wait a second…

My brain finishes connecting the dots and my mouth drops open.

“A… AKIRA?!”

Her grin gets even bigger, “You caught me!”

I’m still totally shell-shocked at this point. I mean really. Akira Satou? With long hair? Wearing GIRLS CLOTHES??? It’s a wonder I’m able to speak at all but I manage to get the ball rolling somehow.

“I-I’m s-sorry, you just l-look so…” the reality of the situation suddenly comes back to me and I find myself desperately fighting back eight years worth of guilt. I’m not doing a very good job of it, either. I focus on the floor while I try to blink back the tears.

I can only manage a whisper at this point, “Akira… I’m sorry I… I didn’t-”

“Shut up and hug me,” she interrupts as she clutches my shirt and yanks me forward, “we can talk about all that sappy shit later itssoGOODTOSEEYOU!!!”

I can’t help but laugh while she locks me in a bear hug and spins me around. It really is good to see her again, and it’s a huge weight off my shoulders to see that she’s not holding a grudge. A few passersby glance our way, no doubt curious about the small girl with the burns and the large blonde falling all over each other while blabbing in Japanese. At this point I could honestly care less. It’s been a VERY long time, and I’m going to do my damnedest to make up for some of it.

She lets me go and we each take a step back. I’m pretty sure I even catch her wiping at her eyes for a second. We both start absorbing all the little details that have changed, but I’m still having trouble getting past her most obvious differences. It just seems so… unnatural to see her showing off her body like that. Not that she has anything to be ashamed of, but wow. I can tell she’s almost as surprised as I am. Almost.

“You cut your hair!”

“You grew out your hair!”

“You’re showing off some skin, girl!”

“You’re wearing girls clothes!”

I clamp a hand over my mouth and feel my face flush. Did I really just say that out loud?

What’s wrong with me?

She smiles and laughs, “Yeah… I finally got tired of working for dad’s company and left. He wasn’t too happy but he got over it. I manage a night club in the city now. Been doing it for a few years. The dress code is a little,” she gestures up and down her body, “different. The pay isn’t quite as good, but it pays the bills and makes us both happy.”

“Oh? You and Lilly are…” I trail off as she shakes her head.

“Heh. No, Lilly and Hi-“ her expression cracks for a second, “Lilly… has her own place. I meant ‘us’ as in me and The Boyfriend.”

Wait, does she mean..?

“Wait, what happened to the guy from Japan?”

She smirks, “I AM talking about the guy from Japan. We’re still together.”

I can’t keep myself from asking, “… You’ve been together this whole time and you haven’t… you know..?”

“Haven’t what? Gotten married? Ha!” she shakes her head but keeps smiling. I suppose it’s something that comes up all the time.

“Anyway, who’s the cutie?” she nods toward Sho who’s been standing beside me in silence this whole time, “He’s with you, right?” she asks with a wink.

Oh crap, I completely forgot about Sho!

“Y-yeah! Sorry. Akira Satou, this is Sho Yamane,” I can see he’s a little taken aback by her comment but he does his best to take it in stride. He reaches out to shake her hand.

“It’s good to meet you.”

“Likewise,” her eyes narrow and she pulls him in closer, “You two are using protection, right?”

The question catches us both off guard. Sho especially. I can’t think of a time I’ve ever seen his face so red. I can’t tell if he’s angry, embarrassed, or terrified.

“Akira!” I protest, “We’re just friends! Sheesh!”

She lets go of him and laughs, “I’m just kidding, calm down!”

We start walking toward the baggage claim. After a few minutes of silence I finally get up the courage to ask Akira about what’s been bugging me since we stepped off the plane.

“So… is Lilly..?”

She shakes her head, “No, she didn’t come with me. She’s had…” she lets out a long, tired sigh, “it’s been a rough couple of days. The parents have been keeping her company and helping with the arrangements, but she’s still a wreck. I can’t blame her.”

“Y-Yeah…” is all I say.

“Those two were really tight, you know? I never admitted it to him but he…” her voice starts to shake a little, “was a great guy. I’m really glad they found each other.”

She stops walking and smacks herself in the head.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…” she gives me a desperate, pleading look.

“It’s okay,” I reassure her, “That was a long time ago.”

So? Does that mean I should just automatically not care that my best friend ended up with the guy I wanted to end up with?

Of course not, but that doesn’t mean I can’t also be happy for them. They were happy together. I can take some small consolation in that. We start walking again.

“Um… is Lilly… I-I mean…” I start shaking a little, “Is she still mad about… before?”

Akira doesn’t say anything for a while. Too long, I think. It looks like she’s chewing on the corners of the inside of her mouth while she searches for the right words.

Here it comes…

“She was never mad at you, Hanako.”

I stop dead in my tracks. Sho almost smacks into me but I hardly notice.

“W-What?”

“She was never mad at you,” she repeats as she turns and gives me a very serious look, “She was upset, confused, and more than a little hurt, but she never blamed you. If anything she blamed herself.”

She starts walking again. I have to jog a little to catch up at first.

“W-What do you mean s-she blamed herself? I was the one who…” I can’t say it.

“I know,” she nods, “but you were right, in a way. Sometimes the two of them treated you like you’d fall apart if anyone so much as breathed on you. I can’t say I’d have been all that happy about it, either.”

“B-But,” I argue, “t-they didn’t know! I n-never told them! The only r-reason they thought that was b-because I always shut m-myself off from the world.”

“Okay, so you both fucked up.”

I slow down and turn to face Sho. He seems… sad.

“Look,” he continues, “I know I don’t know much about your life before we met, or your friends, but it seems clear to me that you BOTH made some mistakes. So why don’t you stop dwelling on a past that NEITHER OF YOU CAN CHANGE and deal with the here and now?”

Akira turns to me and jerks her head at Sho.

“I think like this guy,” she says with a smile.