A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

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Xuan
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Xuan »

I absolutely don't mind them appearing 18+ style, but yeah, it's kinda disturbing. Funny thing is I don't ever remember dreaming about characters in VN, although there was the same drama.
" It would be hard to believe I was nearly killed by a love confession."
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Mirage_GSM
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Mirage_GSM »

Minister of Gloom wrote:3. "Solar Plexus" I have translated just as "lower back". Translating medical terms to Hebrew is difficult.
You should find some body part that is actually on the front side, e.g stomach or sternum. Getting hit in the back would not affect HIsao that badly.
4.
"Whatever Emi is trying to say is cut by a horrified-
*NEXT BOX*
Eeep!"
Only that won't work in Hebrew, because in this language nouns come before adjectives(frankly, I think it makes more sense that way, but I am not exactly unbiased). That means that the "Eeep!" would have to come before the "horrified", and this would look really bad. So I think we'd just have to do without that part.
Maybe something like:
Emi looks horrified. She starts to say something but...
*Next Box*
Eeep!
You have to know if you can get this to work in hebrew.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

Maybe something like:
Emi looks horrified. She starts to say something but...
*Next Box*
Eeep!
You have to know if you can get this to work in hebrew.
Oooh that's very nice, I'll check out the option.
You should find some body part that is actually on the front side, e.g stomach or sternum. Getting hit in the back would not affect HIsao that badly.
Well, it only says there that he is rubbing his solar plexus... I don't know much anatomy, so I just googled it and wrote what I found...
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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Mirage_GSM
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Mirage_GSM »

The Solar Plexus is a cluster of nerves roughly in front of the diaphraghm. It's mostly famous for hurting like hell when being hit. When hit from behind there's the spine protecting it.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

Damn you, google!

Will now be fixed. Thank you very much.
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

Katawa Shoujo related dreams have stopped. I can now continue with my translation without fearing for my sanity.
Scene 15 translated. Strangely, there are no notes this time.
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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Sephiru
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Sephiru »

No notes? Boooo. *sad language obsessed girl* :'(
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

My birthday today! One can make the happiest, most surprising of discoveries when one is absent minded enough.
I have decided to leave the party for a few minuets to translate another scene, out of a sense of duty.
Notes:

1. Emi's "crash-tackle" has been replaced with an "assassination attempt"(that dangerous, dangerous woman)
2. Hanako sometimes looks at Hisao "hopefully/a look full of hope". How cute of her.
3. After much deliberation I have decided to edit and change the class names to the Hebrew format: a letter designating the "level" of the class and a number designating it's place. Hisao's class is now "Yod-Beth Shalosh", "Third twelfth class".
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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Darroth
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Darroth »

Minister of Gloom wrote:My birthday today! One can make the happiest, most surprising of discoveries when one is absent minded enough.
I have decided to leave the party for a few minuets to translate another scene, out of a sense of duty.
Notes:

1. Emi's "crash-tackle" has been replaced with an "assassination attempt"(that dangerous, dangerous woman)
2. Hanako sometimes looks at Hisao "hopefully/a look full of hope". How cute of her.
3. After much deliberation I have decided to edit and change the class names to the Hebrew format: a letter designating the "level" of the class and a number designating it's place. Hisao's class is now "Yod-Beth Shalosh", "Third twelfth class".
Happy Birthday!
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

Busy and busier, ever so busy.

Done with another scene.

1. It builds character="This is how you make a man of yourself"
2. Hebrew somehow makes it seem as if Mutou hates Misha even more than he does already.
3. "What did we say about volume control?"="We talked about speaking so loudly, didn't we?"
4. Misha speaks like a total bimbo. I have just noticed that.
5. Microsoft Word won't mark my "typos" anymore, since there are just so many :)
6. Instead of "yelping" when Misha realizes Hisao isn't having fun(that bastard!) she says "Hey, wait a minuet...!"
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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Mirage_GSM
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Mirage_GSM »

Minister of Gloom wrote: 4. Misha speaks like a total bimbo. I have just noticed that.
I noticed that scenes with Shizune/Misha are harder to translate than others. Long sentences, much use of gerund...
It might be a difference in the writing stlyes between the different authors. I didn't really notice when I played the game, but if you analyze each sentence to find a translation...
Surprisingly I found Rin's scenes very fun to translate. I wouldn't have expected that, it is mostly very concise sentences and the occasional pun to try to save.
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

'nother scene, there.

1. It's kind of hard to describe the art room, I don't know exactly what it is that makes it so.
2. You were right, Mirage. It is truly a pleasure to translate Rin!
3. "The problem is in your pants!"="Your problem is down there, isn't it?"
4. The whole description of Rin and the fork sounds somewhat sexual to me, in Hebrew. Either that, or Freud was right and I just see hints of sex everywhere.
5. "Catches me off-guard"="Catches me with my pants down". Rin's comment about Hisao's problem "down there" catches him with his pants down! I couldn't help but giggle.
6. At some point, Hisao basically asks himself "What is wrong with that person?"
7. It was very hard to find a good translation for "horsing". I found something in the end, but I am kind of worried that I might have accidentally used an ancient word for "riding horses". Which isn't appropriate there, of course.
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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Mirage_GSM
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Mirage_GSM »

You know with all the effort you seem to put into this, you might feel justified to delete the "not very" from the thread title. You put more thought into this than a lot of translators I've worked with in the past.
I am in no position to judge the quality of your translation, knowing not more than a few snippets of jiddish, but if you find one or two people to proofread your work, you could try to make your translation official.
It would be hard to try to beat the number of translations of this but one can try 8)
Emi > Misha > Hanako > Lilly > Rin > Shizune

My collected KS-Fan Fictions: Mirage's Myths
griffon8 wrote:Kosher, just because sex is your answer to everything doesn't mean that sex is the answer to everything.
Sore wa himitsu desu.
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

Wow, there is actually a Hebrew version to some of the pages? This is awesome :P
I mean, the idea is. I don't know how useful the whole thing is but I really like the idea. Too only so few have it, though.
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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Minister of Gloom
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Re: A Not Very Serious Hebrew Translation

Post by Minister of Gloom »

Very busy these days, renovations at all. Can't afford the hours a day of quiet concentration required for a good translation. I guess work will resume once I return from my vacation, on the 27th.
Good news, though: I have been contacted via PM by another Israeli willing to help with the project! She claims she can recruit even more people, so it is actually very possible that once I (we?) finish working on act 1, we might try out for a full, true translation to Hebrew!
Life, what is it but a dream?
זה מגניב אותי כל פעם מחדש, העובדה שיש פה עברית. אני תוהה אם מישהו ישים לב ששיניתי חתימה.
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