Yamaku: The Place Where Dreams Come True (A Clannad Crossover - Chapter 2, 6/16/2024))

[guthrum06]

Preface: Some Notes on Continuity

Where this fits in Clannad: The events of this story occur following Kotomi's route in the visual novel. In other words, this Nagisa did not end up with Tomoya Okazaki and experience the events of After Story. In her own route, as well as in Fuko's and Koumura’s, she becomes sick and is unable to finish her third year with Tomoya and the others. This story assumes this happens after the events of Kotomi's route too. 

Where this fits in Katawa Shoujo: Katawa Shoujo takes place during the 2007-2008 school year. Nagisa was born in 1986 and is in her third senior year, so this story starts over a year before the events of the visual novel, during the 2006-2007 school year.  In other words, the heroines we know from KS are in their second year and Hisao Nakai is still in Chiba, blissfully unaware of his heart condition. The KS heroines aren’t the focus of this story, Nagisa and her fellow third-year students (OCs) are. However, you can expect to see them from time to time. Some more than others

Art by Beroki

TABLE OF CONTENTS:

Chapter 1 (This Post)
Chapter 2
Chapter 3

---

Chapter 1

This feels a lot like last year.

It's the first day of the school year and I'm standing at the bottom of a hill. My school is at the top.  And I'm having a hard time taking that first step.

I just ate dorayaki at a tea house. My parents took me there yesterday, and it was really tasty, so I went again this morning. It was worth walking down the hill, but now I'm not sure I want to go back up.

Sometimes, when I have to do something really scary, food is the only thing that motivates me. It gives me something to look forward to. When I woke up today, my first thought was that I wanted to get on a bus and go back home. But instead, I got ready for my first day in a scary new place and put on my new uniform. That’s why I deserved a reward.

I’m not sure how I feel about the new uniform. I wore my old one for four years and got very attached to it. I was very sad to leave it at home.

It feels strange to be wearing something so different. The forest green skirt is cute, and I like the bow, but the shoulders on the blouse are a little bulky. I think I’ll get used to it with time. Maybe by the time I graduate I'll be just as attached to this uniform.

This will be my third try at finishing my last year of high school. I get sick all the time. So sick that I can't do anything but stay in bed for months. So, I haven't been able to attend school enough to pass my exams.  That's why I’m 19 and I still haven't graduated high school. Even if all goes according to plan this year, I’ll be 20 by the time I graduate.

Last year, my second attempt at completing high school started off so much better than I could have hoped. I was worried I wouldn’t be able to make friends because all the people I knew had graduated. But then, I became part of a wonderful circle of friends. I loved them all. They even helped me create a club.

It all fell apart though. I got sick and couldn't finish the year. They all graduated and moved on while I was stuck in bed. And now I’m doing my third year. Again.

I miss all my friends, but Tomoya is the dearest to me of them all. So dear to me that I fell in love with him. About a year ago, at the bottom of a different hill, he gave me the push I needed to make the climb and go to school when I was really scared. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't have met any of my friends last year.

I clench my eyes shut and take a deep breath. I picture the boy who gave me that push.

Tomoya, I could use another push right about now…

I shake my head.

I can do this on my own. Tomoya gave me the push I needed. He helped me make friends and start the drama club. But I did a lot on my own too. I can do this on my own. It does make it easier though, knowing he would want me to do this.

“Dorayaki,” I whisper to myself as I take my first step. I have an extra one in my bag so that I can reward myself with another one for making it through the day. 

As I make my way up the hill, I wonder what they might have in the cafeteria later. At lunch today, I can pick out something they serve there as a reward. One that’s on campus.

After I got sick last year, my parents started looking into sending me to a different school. One for students whose medical issues make it harder for them to go to a regular school. One that would work with me to stay on track to graduate even if I got sick.

They found one. But unfortunately, it is very far from my hometown.

I have reached the top of the hill, and I'm standing in front of a large iron gate with red brick pillars on either side. It certainly looks fancier than my old school.

This isn’t just my new school. It's a boarding school. So, it's also my new home. Yamaku Academy.

I'm not sure what to make of it yet. I only moved here yesterday but I already really miss my parents and friends. I even miss my town. I’ve spent my whole life there and gotten pretty attached to it. I miss everything so much that I cried myself to sleep last night.

But my parents and friends think this place will be good for me. My dad even put aside his silly antics when convincing me to come here. He looked more serious than I had ever seen him. That's how I know this is important.

I go through the gate and look at the time. I'm supposed to check in with the head nurse in about five minutes. Around the clock medical care is one of the benefits of going here. Having medical care on campus is a big improvement. My hometown doesn't even have its own hospital. We had to go to the next town over.

Still, talking about my health with a stranger makes me uncomfortable.

I'm standing in front of the entrance to the auxiliary building now. The nurse’s office is inside.

I clench my eyes shut, whisper “Dorayaki,” and go through the door. 

A man in his early 30s greets me. He has purple hair, a lab coat, and a silly grin. He reminds me a little of my father in how he holds himself. It makes me feel a little more comfortable.

Nervously, I squeeze out the words, “H-hello, sir.…I have an appointment with…the n-nurse.”

The man's grin gets sillier, and he closes one eye. 

“That would be me. You must be Furukawa.”

I nod, “It is very n-nice to meet you, sir.”

“Come into my office, and we’ll talk.” 

I close my eyes for a moment, whisper, “Dorayaki,” and follow him.

“What was that?”

I feel my cheeks flush at being overheard, “N-nothing, sir.”

I follow him and sit across from his desk while he looks at the contents of a folder. His grin never leaves his face.

He looks up from the folder, “You have HIDS, is that correct?”

“Y-yes sir.”

For my whole life, doctors have said I was sickly and weak and prone to fever and that’s all there was to it. But after I got sick last year, Kotomi did everything she could to get to the bottom of my medical issues. I'm very lucky to have such a good friend. Especially one who is a genius.

After doing some research, she suggested that my doctors test me for a specific group of genetic conditions. I think she called them… ‘periodic fever syndromes.’ One of them came back positive. I was diagnosed with one called HIDS. Those letters stand for Hyperimmunoglobulin D Syndrome. I spent a lot of time memorizing that and learning to say it, but even doctors and nurses just call it HIDS.

As I understand it, having HIDS means the genes that deal with my immune system aren’t how they are supposed to be. They give bad instructions to my body, so I get flu-like symptoms even when I don't have any infection. 

The nurse gets out a stethoscope and approaches me. He listens to my heart, and then my breathing. Then he gets out an infrared thermometer. While he points it at my forehead he says, “How are you feeling today?”

“G-good. Just…nervous, sir.”

He nods and smiles., “That's understandable. It's a big day.” The thermometer beeps and he checks it. “You don't have a fever, that's good. Would you mind telling me how your HIDS presents?”

“Yes sir. I get sick for a long time with a high fever, and I get so tired I can't get out of bed. S-some nausea and aches and pains too, sir.”

He smiles, “You don't need to be so formal with me. I appreciate the respect, but I would prefer you to relax a bit.” He closes one eye and grins, “Plus, you calling me ‘sir’ is making me feel old.” 

I close my eyes tight out of embarrassment, “I-I’m sorry.”

I almost added a ‘sir’ but managed to stop myself.

He grins, “Not a big deal. So, how long are these episodes usually?”

I open my eyes, “At least a month…sometimes six.”

“How often do you have them?”

I sigh. “Once a year, usually.”

“Have you had an episode since you started your medication?”

There's no cure. After all, the problem is in my genes. They can't change those. At least not yet. Kotomi did say maybe someday, but not any time soon. 

But I am on a new medication that is supposed to make me sick less often and for shorter periods of time.

“No, I haven't.”

He nods, “Okay. You have your own thermometer, I’m guessing?”

“Y-yes si-...I mean, yes. I take my temperature e-every morning and night and keep a journal.”

He smiles, “That’s great. You’d be surprised how many students here are lax with their situation.”

“Oh…uh-uhm…I’m sure they have their reasons.”

He laughs, “It’s nice of you to support your new classmates when you haven't met them. They are lucky to have you. Anyway, you don’t need to come to see me unless you notice your temperature is starting to trend upwards.”

“U-um…what will h-happen…?”

“Happen?”

“I-if…I get sick.”

“Well, you should come see me and I'll check you out.” He winks. “I mean that in a medical sense of course.” He pauses for a moment with a grin on his face. 

It takes me a moment to get his joke. When I do I blush and look down at my hands.

He is more like my dad than I thought.

He chuckles and continues, “We'll start you on steroids and anti-fever medication, which along with your daily meds will hopefully ease your symptoms and shorten your episode.”

“Th-thank you for having it all planned. That is a relief.”

He laughs, “Of course, it's my job.”

“The teachers here will…understand if I get sick?”

He nods, “You would be excused from classes until you get better. Hopefully, with your new medication, it won't cause you problems for long. But the teachers here know how to be flexible. They'll work with you and do everything they can to help you keep up.”

I feel some tension leave my body, “Okay. Thank you so much, sir.” I sigh, “S-sorry, I forgot.”

He chuckles, “No problem, Furukawa. Have a good first day.”

I thank him again and leave the auxiliary building. I take a deep breath. That wasn't too bad. He was nice. It is a relief knowing that I have him to turn to if I get sick.

…WHEN I get sick.

Now I need to find my classroom. I hate this part. Everyone else in this class has been here together for the first two years. I feel out of place. Like an outsider. But I felt that way last year and things worked out okay.

As I walk towards the school building, I recite my mantra. This time in my head. I don't want someone to overhear me again.

Dorayaki. Dorayaki. Dorayaki.

There are other students around, but none of them try to talk to me. That's usually how it goes when you're the new girl. I think I would be embarrassed and awkward if they tried, anyway.

Just outside of my classroom, there's a large bulletin board with a sign that says, “Clubs.” I feel myself smile as I look at all the flyers. They are all very well made. More professional than my flier last year. Not as cute, though. No one used the Great Dango Family as a mascot.

It looks like they have a lot of clubs here. I thought maybe there would be fewer since the health of students might get in the way of club activities. I can see I was wrong.

As I look over the flyers, I see that there's track, astronomy, band, chorus, newspaper, art, soccer and more. My eyes linger on one flier in particular – Drama club.

I get out my notebook and excitedly write down the room number and time for the informational meeting. It's one week from today at 4:30 in the performing arts center auditorium. 

The bell rings, and I hastily finish writing and go into my classroom. When I do, I find that there isn't anywhere for me to sit. The room is filled to the brim with students, and there's not an available desk. Now everyone is looking at me as I stand near the doorway, unsure what to do. The teacher isn't here yet. I feel my face turning red.

Dorayaki.

My voice cracks when I say, “Excuse me…d-does anyone know where I can…sit?”

I hear a male voice say, “Yeah. For you, my lap is available.” Several other students chuckle with him.

I clench my eyes shut in embarrassment, and then a girl aggressively says, “Shut up Ichiro. I don't want her first impression of our class to be you.” I open my eyes in time to see Ichiro recoil and the class go quiet.

The owner of the voice stands up from her front row seat and approaches me with a smile and a comforting voice that sounds very different from the one she just used. “Hi, I'm Akane. I'm the class rep. Let's go find you a desk.”

I nod, thankful for her help, and follow her into the hall.

“What's your name?”

“Nagisa.”

“Well, Nagisa. Welcome to Yamaku, and class 3-1. Sorry about Ichiro. He's the worst, and he didn't waste any time in making sure you know that.” She sighs, “I apologize for not having a desk ready for you. Our homeroom teacher isn’t exactly on top of things. I was supposed to have our class roster a week ago, but I still don’t have it. So, I didn’t know about you.”

She has an accent I don’t recognize. I understand everything she is saying, but I’ve also never heard anyone talk quite how she does. Almost every word sounds a little off, but it’s hard to put my finger on. I wonder where she’s from.

“I-it's okay. Thank you, Class Rep.”

Akane is a tall girl who has dark shoulder length hair, with fringes that cover her forehead. She wears black rimmed glasses and has brown eyes behind them. She has a commanding air about her, but somehow also feels very friendly.  She reminds me a little of my friend Kyou from back home, who was also a class rep.

I follow her to a door that says, “Maintenance Staff.” She knocks on the door, and it is opened by a smiling man in his 40s with long dark hair he wears in a ponytail. He has a goatee that is starting to gray.

Akane says, “Mr. Kobayashi, can you please bring a desk to class 3-1? We are one short.”

He nods, “Sure thing.” He leaves his office and walks towards the stairs.

Akane turns around and heads back towards the classroom, and I follow her.

She continues, “I bet it's hard showing up here in your third year. We don't get a whole lot of transfer students. All the classes here are the same all three years, so everyone knows everyone.”

“I-it is a little hard.”

She smiles at me, “Just watch out for the guys, okay? Especially Ichiro. You're new. I have a feeling that means they will be extra interested.”

I stop walking and say, “W-why?”

Akane stops too and says, “Our class is 70% boys. And…you're a new girl. The first new girl since our first year, and you're pretty.”

I feel my face flush so I look down, “N-no…I'm not…”

Akane laughs, “Well, you're apparently pretty and modest. Just watch out for them, okay?” She studies me for a moment while tapping her finger on her chin. “I'm worried about you. You seem…defenseless. Why don't you come to lunch with me and my friends today? I can guarantee one of those guys is going to try to get you to eat with them, so you'll be able to say no.”

I nod, “O-okay…thank you.”

…

“Hey, Nagisa, was it? Why don't you come to lunch with me, I'll show you around campus. Help you get used to things. Show you how stuff works around here.”

Morning classes just ended, and as Akane predicted, a boy is trying to get me to go to lunch with him. It's the same boy who embarrassed me earlier. Ichiro, I think his name was. He's tall, with an athletic build. He has dark spiky hair and brown eyes. He has a cane, but one that he leans his elbow on, instead of one he holds.

“O-okay.”

From my side I hear Akane say, “Actually, she's going to lunch with me, Ichiro. Run along.” She points to the door.

He scoffs, “She said ‘okay!’ Butt out for once!”

I frown, “I-I'm sorry, I did tell her I would go to lunch with her first.”

Akane crosses her arms and pulls out her stern voice again. “See? Like I said, run along.”

Ichiro scoffs again and leaves the classroom.

Akane and I leave the classroom together. She sounds frustrated when she says, “Why were you going to go with him? Didn't I warn you? About him specifically?”

“I-I'm sorry. I'm not good at saying no. I get flustered and…I just…want people to be happy. And it seemed like he was being nice. So, I was going to do what he asked.”

He also reminds me a little of Tomoya. It's the attitude and spiky hair, I think. But it's too embarrassing to tell her that.

She stops walking and turns to look at me with a bemused grin. “You…really are defenseless, aren't you?”

“N-no. I…I don’t think so…"

“Look, Nagisa, I don't know how it was at your old school, but some of the guys here are only after one thing.” She pauses for a moment and studies me. “You…know what I mean when I say that, right?”

I nod.

“So…just be careful. If you go around doing what some guy asks you just to make him happy…well….”

I feel tears of embarrassment welling up inside me again.  I clench my eyes shut to close them in.  Then I feel a gentle hand on my shoulder. And I hear a gentle voice.

“I’m so sorry, Nagisa. I didn't mean to embarrass you. I shouldn’t be teasing you. I don't know you well enough for that."

I open my eyes and see her gentle smile, which makes me feel better. “N-no…I’m sorry. I’m just…a crybaby. It's worse than normal right now. I’m…having a hard time, I-I'm sorry.”

She smiles and squeezes my shoulder, “You don't have to apologize when you're the one who is upset, okay?”

I nod and smile back.

“You let me know if I can do anything to help you adjust, okay? It's kind of my job as class rep.”

I smile back, “Thank you. You're already helping. You're a very good class rep.”

…

We go through the cafeteria line, and I am very happy to see that it is far more relaxed here than it was at my old school. There is plenty of food and it isn't insanely crowded. They have a pork cutlet sandwich too, one of my main rewards from back home. I can mix it in with dorayaki now.

Now Akane and I are standing in front of a table with two other girls. She puts her tray down and uses animated gestures when she says, “Hey, you two. This is Nagisa. She's a third-year transfer student.” She looks at me while she continues to move her hands as she speaks, “Usually we have a fourth, but she's out sick today.”

One of the seated girls, a pretty blond with blue eyes, gives me a warm, welcoming smile. It makes me smile back. “Hello Nagisa, I'm Lilly, it's lovely to meet you.” She pats on the seat next to her and moves an object next to her that I don't recognize. It looks like metal sticks bundled together, “Would you like to have a seat next to me?”

“Um…y-yes. Thank you very much.” I take a seat next to Lilly, who I notice is much taller than I am. I always feel small, but next to her I really feel it. It would be generous to say that my head goes up to her shoulder.

Akane sits down next to a girl with short blue hair and glasses, and they start gesturing to each other. 

Akane says, “Shizune says hi.”

Oh. That was sign language a minute ago. 

I smile at Shizune and say, “Hi. It's very nice to m-meet you. It means a lot to me that you are all so welcoming. Thank y-you all very much for your kindness and generosity.”

Akane moves her hands as I’m speaking. I know she must be translating, but it's a bit distracting. It will take some getting used to.  Shizune smiles and nods to me.

Lilly says, “My, you’re a polite one, aren't you?”

“U-um…am I?”

Lilly giggles, “You are. I think it's a good thing. People tease me for being too polite, though. So perhaps I’m not the best judge.”

As Lilly turns to speak to me, I notice she is looking over my head when she does. I also notice now that her blue eyes are very cloudy. She also moves her hands slowly and delicately to find her cup before taking a drink from it. 

She's blind. 

Akane laughs. “Shizune says it doesn't sound as pompous coming from Nagisa.”

Lilly clicks her tongue and pouts, “See, Nagisa? Even my own very dear cousin teases me.”

This makes me giggle, “My family teases me a lot too. It must be nice being here with each other. I…miss my family quite a lot. Even the teasing.”

Lilly laughs softly, “There are certainly pros and cons.”

Akane laughs, “That's exactly what Shizune said. You two sure are alike for people who butt heads all the time.”

The two cousins look annoyed by Akane's assessment. Which I think might prove her point.

“Are you both third years too?”

Lilly shakes her head. “We are in our second year. But we're class reps too, that's how we first met Akane.”

I smile, “Wow. You're all…so dedicated to the school. That's very impressive.”

Lilly and Akane laugh while Shizune looks at me like I’m some sort of animal she’s never seen before.

Akane says, “Wait, wait, wait…you're serious, aren't you? Most people around here who said those words would be mocking us. But you aren't.”

I shake my head. “You're all working hard to help students, and the school. I really think that's wonderful.”

Akane and Shizune exchange a look and Lilly says, “Thank you, Nagisa. I'm glad you view it that way.”

Akane laughs at something Shizune signs and brushes her hair back behind her ear. Only now do I notice that she has a hearing aid. It isn’t like the ones I’ve seen before, though. It has two pieces. One behind her ear, and one a ways above her ear and attached to her scalp. When she turns to look at me and Lilly, now that I know what to look for, I see she also has one on her other ear. They are both black like her rather thick hair, so I didn't notice them at first.

 “Again, Shizune said the same thing.”

Lilly sighs, “Well, that's not surprising in this case. I think we all appreciate someone as earnest as Nagisa. We don't get much praise.”

Shizune signs something to Akane, who sighs and says, “She wants to know if you’ll join student council. Lilly and Shizune are both in it. So is our friend who isn’t here today.”

“Wh-what? No. I would…just get in the way. But…I think it's great that you do that.”

Akane relays Shizune's message “Let me know if you change your mind.”

Akane rolls her eyes at something else Shizune signs. “You should make sure you're in some club. Don't be lazy like so many students around here.” Akane sighs. “Her words, not mine. Clubs aren't for everyone. I’m not in a club, for example. Class rep responsibilities and tutoring is enough for me. And yet, she’s still calling me lazy.”

Lilly says, “Surely, she wouldn’t include you, Akane. Your work as a tutor is just as demanding as any club, if not more so.”

Shizune signs something and Akane says, “Yep, she is. She says don’t end up like me. Join a club.” She punctuates the sentence with another eye roll.

 “Oh, I love clubs. I think students working together towards a common goal is…just wonderful.”

Shizune’s eyebrows shoot up and she starts moving her hands the fastest I’ve seen so far.  Akane laughs, “She wants to know if those of us who can hear you are really sure you aren't making fun of us. She thinks your face looks serious but is wondering about your tone.” She flashes me a smile as she continues to sign, “I’m telling her you’re serious.”

Lilly puts a hand to her mouth and laughs softly. “I was going to ask about her facial expression, I thought I might be missing something too.”

I frown and look down at the table. “Why do you all keep thinking I’m being mean?”

Akane chuckles, “You're just so sweet. I guess we must not have a lot of that around here. But you're right, we should have known you were serious from earlier. What club are you going to join?”

“Drama. That's the club I was in at my old school.”

Lilly says, “Ah, I think that is a very small club. They will be happy to have you.”

I smile, “I had to start it with some friends at my old school because people lost interest. I’m g-glad there’s a club here, even if it's small.”

Shizune signs something to Akane, who sighs. That seems to be a common response to things Shizune signs.  “She says if you started a club, you have what it takes to be on the student council.”

I look down, feeling embarrassed. 

I made myself sound more impressive than I am.

“Oh…w-well I had the help of…many friends. And we still never put on a play or anything…not…after I got sick.”

Akane says, “That stinks. Hopefully you can do a play here.”

I look up and smile, “Yes. I hope so.”

I just hope I can stay healthy for long enough.

…

I return to my dorm room for the evening feeling drained because of all the stress of the first day at my new school.

I sit on my bed and snuggle my dango plush.

The day went better than my first day last year. I made it up the hill without anyone having to help and I was able to talk to people on my own. I even made a few friends, I think. It’s sort of nice knowing that girls like Lilly, Shizune and Akane can relate to having their health get in the way sometimes. As much as I love my friends back home, none of them could really relate to that. 

I do wonder what all my friends from back home are doing right now. Of course, none of them are there anymore. The girls all went to university, Sunohara went back home to find a job, and Tomoya's going to cram school to get into a university in Tokyo. He and Kotomi are living together. I think they will be engaged very soon from the way they both talk. They’re young but…so right for each other. 

It's a good thing Kotomi straightened him out and made him want to go to university. I'm not sure what he would have done otherwise. He was so lost when I met him.

Lost like I was. Like I still am.

I squeeze the dango plush tight.

I would never have been able to do that for him. It's good they ended up together. She had such a hard childhood. And he was her long-lost childhood friend, so she has known him longer. And she’s better for him. And beautiful. And so smart. And a wonderful person. She deserves him more than I do.

But…I wish I could stop thinking about him. I would love this dango no matter what. It’s the cutest thing in the world and my friends bought it for me together when I got sick. But when I found out it was his idea to get it for me, I loved it even more.

I squeeze it a little tighter.

I look at the cell phone sitting on my desk. It has everyone's numbers in it. They made sure to put them in. Maybe I should call him.

I shake my head at my silly thoughts. He has a girlfriend. I shouldn’t be calling him, I don't think. Especially not when I feel this way about him. It wouldn't be right. Maybe I should set up a call with both of them. That might be okay.

I sigh and shake my head at myself again.

He's probably not even thinking about me. Why would he? I'm just the awkward crybaby he was friends with.

I nod to myself, feeling resolved.

I should do my best to stop thinking about him too.

[Silentcook]

The mere idea that you polluted the forum with KEY stuff makes me want to delete the thread, perma-accountban you, perma-emailban you, perma-IPban you, salt the Fan Fiction section and close it down for a month since I can't slash-and-burn it down. We at 4LS didn't much like KEY, and especially Jun Maeda - can you tell?

More seriously, my worry was that your stuff could have little or nothing to do with KS, a "reskin". That doesn't seem to be the case, so go forth. The stuff about KEY is true though.

[Frankyo]

I remain hopefully optimistic but I do come from watching the anime where Nagisa is with Tomoya, so her by herself at Yamaku will be sorta clashing with what I'm used to/expect. Since I've read your previous works and have seen your OC work with established characters I hope this will be a good fanfic as well.

We at 4LS don't much like KEY, and especially Jun Maeda

ootl, is this just a joke or what's up with KEY and you guys 4LS?

[guthrum06]

I remain hopefully optimistic but I do come from watching the anime where Nagisa is with Tomoya, so her by herself at Yamaku will be sorta clashing with what I'm used to/expect.

I mean, isn't the whole point of fanfiction to put characters in positions they aren't in within the canon?

[guthrum06]

I am joining Akane for lunch today. I have the past several days too. It has been the highlight of each day, getting to know her and my other schoolmates a little bit better.

When we enter the cafeteria my eyes and ears are immediately drawn to the table where Shizune and Lilly are already sitting. This is because there is someone new there. And she's very loud.

“Wahaha!~ Was Shicchan mad at you, Lilly?”

While we’re in line Akane notices me looking over towards the table and says, “That would be Misha. The one who was sick the last couple days. She's still not 100% healthy but…you wouldn't know it from her voice. She can be…loud and a little annoying sometimes…but she grows on you.”

I smile, “I-I’m sure she’s nice.”

Akane smiles back, “She is. One of the nicest people I know, actually. But I know you’re a little timid and she’s…the opposite of that, so I’m warning you.”

I nod, “Th-thank you. I’ll be okay.”

We get our food and walk over to the table.

Once we are closer, I see Misha more clearly. She has messy waist-length light brown hair and brown eyes and she’s wearing such a big smile that it makes me smile too. I also notice that like Akane, she knows sign language and is relaying information between the two cousins.

They have no way to talk when they are alone. I hadn't thought of that. That must be hard as family.

When we get to the table, I take a seat next to Lilly again, while Akane sits next to Misha. When I sit down, Misha loudly says, “Hi Nagisa! I’m Misha! Sorry I missed you yesterday, but Akane told me aaaallll about you!” She gives Akane's shoulder a squeeze.

“I-it's nice to meet you. You are a second year too?”

“That’s right! Do I look older? Wahaha~!”

Confused by her loud and out of place laughter I look at Akane, who gives me an embarrassed shrug and smile.

Shizune signs something and Misha says, “Shicchan says I need to introduce myself better. She wants me to also tell you that I also have class with her and I’m her…her…interpreter? and…” Misha looks confused, then she signs to Shizune and says, “That last part was too fast, Shicchan! I'm still sick! Slow down!”

Akane finishes for her, “And you’re in student council with them too.”

Misha smiles, “Thanks Akane!” She pats Akane on the back and smiles at me. “She's my sign senpai! I wasn't very good when I got here last year, but I’ve gotten so much better thanks to her helping me after class! Good enough to interpret for Shicchan. I’ll be just as good as she is, soon~!”

She still has this much energy when she’s sick? Maybe if she had HIDS she wouldn't even notice.

Akane laughs, “I’m just glad that you’re good enough now that I don’t have to go to student council meetings.”

Shizune sighs and signs something to Akane, who sighs in response. “She says I should have just joined.” She signs to Shizune and says, “You have a one-track mind, you know that?”

Lilly laughs softly, “That passion for student council is one of my dear cousin’s strong points. And…one of her weak points too.”

Misha relays the information to Shizune, who starts to glower and move her hands furiously, to which Misha replies “Wha? Shicchan, that’s too mean.”

Shizune glares at Misha, who relays Shizune’s words in a half-hearted voice, “Your weak point is that you don’t care enough about student council. And it’s such a big weak point it outweighs your strong points.”

Lilly sighs, “Yes, we are of different minds about this.” She shrugs and looks toward Shizune, “I can’t be too upset with you. I was rude first. I apologize, Shizune.”

Shizune hesitates for a moment and then sighs and signs to Misha who says, “I'm sorry too.”

I start to feel very awkward in the middle of this tense conversation between three student council members, two of whom are related. Luckily, it seems Akane has picked up on that and she steers the conversation elsewhere.

“So Nagisa, how are you feeling a few days into Yamaku?”

“U-um…I like it. I’m still getting used to…not being at home. But people have been nice and welcoming. Like all of you. I d-don’t feel like too much of an outsider.”

Lilly smiles at me, “Well, you’re a very sweet girl. It’s hard not to be welcoming.”

Even though she must be 3 years younger than me, somehow she feels like a big sister.

“Thank you.” I turn to Akane, “So, you tutor sign l-language?”

She nods, “It’s my mother tongue. So I don't need classes. But I want to teach sign language, so I convinced the instructor here to let me help out my first year, and I've kept at it.”

Misha puts an arm around her and hugs her so close their cheeks are touching, “And she's great at it!”

Akane blushes, “Um…th-thanks, Misha. But can you…let me go? This is…embarrassing. A-and I don't want to get sick.”

Misha laughs loudly and lets her go, “Sorry, sorry! I'm just really thankful for you. You have me thinking I want to be a teacher too, you know.”

Akane laughs but looks more than a little flustered, “I know. Actually, you want to teach too, right Lilly?”

Lilly nods, “Yes. I love English, so I’d like to teach it.” She looks towards me, "As with Akane, I want to teach my mother tongue. Well, one of them. I have one Japanese parent and one Scottish parent, so I learned both at the same time.”

“Wow, that's really amazing! My English is…awful.”

Lilly smiles, “Well, come exam time I may be able to help you a bit.”

“Thank you. I might need it.”

“Shicchan says she wants to be a businesswoman and…and…” She squints for a moment and looks like she’s thinking hard, while Shizune repeats the same hand motion more slowly. Misha sighs and turns to Akane, “Sorry to ask for help again…I'm really off my game today. Brain feels fuzzy.”

Akane pats her on the shoulder, “Philanthropist. Not the most common word, no big deal. Especially when you're sick.”

Misha’s dejected face turns into a big smile, “Thanks!”

Akane relays a message from Shizune “She wants to know what you want to do when you graduate. I think we’re all interested, actually.”

The other two girls nod.

I frown and look down at my food, feeling embarrassed in front of these more accomplished people who are already planning their futures despite being so much younger than me.

I quietly say, “Um…I…don’t really know. J-just graduating has been hard for me. My health has made it…h-hard. So I haven't thought thought that f-far ahead.”

I feel a comforting hand on my back. I look up and see Lilly's warm smile, “You have plenty of time.”

“Thank you, Lilly.”

Akane nods and gives me her own warm smile, “She's right. Maybe if you like drama club this year, you'll do something related to that.”

I force a smile, “Yeah, maybe.”

If I can make it through this year without getting sick for months on end.

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm at the informational meeting for drama club. So far…I'm the only one here, and it's 5 minutes past the scheduled time. I'm starting to wonder whether I will have to start drama club here too.

Just as I'm about to give up, I hear the doors to the auditorium open.

I hear a boy say in a disappointed voice, “Only one?”

I hear a girl say, “Well…at least it's a girl. I won't be outnumbered anymore if she joins.”

I start to feel very nervous so I clench my eyes shut and whisper, “Dorayaki.”

Then, I stand up and turn to smile at the sources of these voices. I see two boys and a girl. The girl is walking arm-in-arm with one of the boys. They must be a couple.

I recognize the other boy as one of my classmates. He would be difficult to forget.

He's the largest person I've ever seen. He's so tall he has to duck under door frames and his shoulders are so broad that I think it would take five or six of me to match his width. In class, he has a special desk.

He has short, dark, curly hair and brown eyes, and a large square jaw. His appearance was a little intimidating at first, but even a week into class I’ve seen enough of him to know he's just a regular student who happens to be really big. He even seems nicer than most people. He also happens to be the best student in our class, even better than Akane. They have a little bit of a rivalry. But it's kind of one-sided according to her.

He has a slight limp and he uses a cane, one that goes up to my shoulder.

When they get close,he recognizes me too. In a booming, deep voice he says, “Oh, hi. Nagisa, right?”

I nod, “Yes. You're…Daiki?”

He smiles and nods and looks at his fellow club members, “ This is Nagisa. She’s a third-year transfer student.” Then he looks at me and points at them with his cane, “These are my friends Ken and Chiyo. We're…the drama club.”

Chiyo laughs, “Sorry if you were expecting something more. We just started last year, so we're small. We’re both third years, too.”

Chiyo might be the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen in person. If she weren't wearing the same uniform as me, I would think she was a celebrity. She's a tall girl with green eyes and chestnut-colored hair that she wears in braided twintails. Her delicate facial features and very feminine curves have me feeling a little jealous. Especially because we have the same outfit on. On her, it somehow looks glamorous. On me, it's just a school uniform.

The next thing I notice about her is that her nails are painted a very very vibrant red color, and they also seem to have some sort of design on them.

I smile, “I'm very happy there is a drama club. It doesn't matter how many members there are.”

Ken says, “Well…since it's just you, we can probably skip the really formal part and just have a chat. Let's take a seat together.”

Ken's a tall boy, though you wouldn't be able to tell next to Daiki. He has short black hair and dark glasses on. Now that he's closer, I think he must be blind. Like Lilly did when we first met, he is looking clear over my head when he speaks to me.

Daiki sighs and says, “…I'll sit on the stage.”

I am frustrated about being small sometimes and wish I was bigger. Before meeting Daiki, I had never stopped to think that being really big has some serious downsides. He doesn't even fit in these chairs.

Ken nods, “Right. And we'll sit in the front row. I'm good from here, Chiyo.”

“O-oh! Right.” She lets out a squeaky laugh. “Sorry, Ken.” She lets go of him and he takes a seat. I notice her face has turned red.

The two of them leave a space between them, so I end up sitting between Ken and Chiyo. Daiki is seated right across from me on the stage.

Ken says, “I'm technically the club president, so I suppose I'll lead. We're the drama club. We aim to put on one play each year. We’ll do one at the end of this trimester. That's…pretty much it.”

Chiyo laughs, “It really is it, isn't it? Doesn't sound very impressive when you put it like that.”

“It is impressive! Students working together toward a common goal is…beautiful. And doing a play as students i-is just…amazing!”

Chiyo scoffs, glares at me and crosses her arms, “Did you seriously just come here to make fun of us? You seriously didn't have something better to do?! You're pathetic. Get out of here and stop wasting our time.”

I look down and close my eyes to avoid her glare. And to hold in the tears that I can feel coming.

I wanted to join the drama club. But they don't want me. They think I'm being mean. How did I mess this up so badly?

Daiki quickly says, “Chiyo - she's serious. From what I've seen in class, this is real. She isn’t mocking us.”

Chiyo responds, “What? Seriously?”

He sighs, “Yes, seriously. It's okay Nagisa, we know you aren't making fun of us. Right, Chiyo?”

Daiki's words make me feel a little better. I open my eyes in time to see Chiyo uncross her arms and looking at me apologetically. She pats my shoulder. “Oh…I'm…really sorry for misunderstanding. So you…really like plays that much?”

I nod and look down at my hands while I fidget, “E-everyone at Yamaku keeps thinking I’m m-making fun of them. I’m sorry if it sounded that way. I d-didn't want to make you feel bad.”

Chiyo waves her arms, “No, no, no. You did nothing wrong. We’re just…jaded, pessimistic people. It's on us, okay?”

Ken laughs, “Us, huh? I only seem to remember one of us jumping to a harsh conclusion.”

She groans, “Fine. Me. It’s on me. I'm very sorry, Nagisa. I was a total bitch. Please don't go because of me. I want you to stay.”

She gives me a really warm smile, and it makes me feel a lot better. I smile back.

“I-I'll stay.”

She squeezes my shoulder, “Good.”

Ken says, “Well…now that that's out of the way…Have you acted before, Nagisa?”

“No.”

“What experience do you have with plays?”

I frown, “…none, really. I was in the drama club at my old school…but, I got sick and never did a play.”

Ken responds, “Oh. Well that's okay. We'll teach you, that's what clubs are about, after all.”

I smile, “So you three have experience?”

Chiyo nods, “We did a play together last year and we did most of it on our own. Our advisor isn't really the hands-on type.”

Ken laughs, “As you can see, he isn't even here today. We were late because we were waiting for him, but we gave up.”

Daiki laughs, “Don't worry. She knows how he is, he's our homeroom teacher, after all. He didn't even make sure our classroom had a desk for her on our first day.”

I smile, “Oh. I didn't know he was the adviser.”

Ken chuckles, “I don't know if he knows.”

“Yes, he's a bit forgetful. B-but very nice.”

Chiyo chuckles, “Wow, you really are sweet if you're defending him.”

I shrug, “I like him. So…when you did a play last year, what did each of you do?”

Chiyo says, “I acted. I also designed and made the costumes.”

Ken says, “I acted and helped Daiki with the set, sound and props.”

Daiki adds, “I directed and did all the other technical stuff, like lighting and set design.”

They actually know what they are doing! They are a REAL drama club! We'll actually do a play!

If I can stay healthy.

I smile, “That's…really wonderful. I don't know i-if I can be of help but…I hope I can contribute. I want to do a play with all of you. I want to join drama club.”

Chiyo smiles and says, “Welcome aboard!” while the two boys smile. They really seem glad to have me. I hope I don't let them down.

---

Class just got out for lunch. As I'm packing up my things, I notice there's a shadow over me and my desk. I look up and see the source of that shadow, and smile at him. Daiki smiles back and asks, “Do you want to come to lunch with me and the other drama club members?”

I look at Akane, who smiles and gives me a thumbs up. She's saying it's okay in this case for me to say ‘yes’ to this boy's request. I feel a little bad not going to lunch with Akane and her friends who have been so welcoming, but since she approves, I guess I shouldn't. Lilly, Misha, and Shizune have all been very nice to me, but going to lunch with my club does sound appealing. Shizune would approve of me becoming more involved in a club, too.

I look up at Daiki and smile, “Yeah, sure.”

Daiki ducks under the door frame as we exit, making me realize what a funny-looking pair we make. I can't even get close to touching the top of the door frame with an outstretched hand. But he has to watch his head.

We head to the cafeteria, where I notice Daiki doesn't get a tray. With his cane, I guess that would be hard.

“Do you need help?”

He bends down and says, “Sorry, I didn't hear you. It's loud in here.”

Yeah, and your ear is really far from my mouth.

“Y-you didn't get a tray, so I thought you might need help.”

He laughs, “I can get a tray on my own.” He grabs one and easily balances it on his hand with his palm facing up. It's so large that it's plenty stable when he holds it like that. He puts the tray back and says, “We're going to the club room in the performing arts center, so we can't bring trays.”

I nod and grab curry bread and melon bread. I haven't tried them here so far, but I liked them at my old school. After we make our selections, Daiki and I walk to the performing arts center. We chat on the way there.

“How are you liking it here?”

“I like it. I really miss my parents and some friends back home…but apart from that, it's great. People have been really nice to me.”

“That's good. I have really liked it here myself. But…I can imagine coming in for your third year being…daunting.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well…first everyone here already knows each other and stuff like that. But, being around so many others with disabilities and medical problems for the first time can be overwhelming. It kind of was for me my first year.”

“I've…kind of liked it.”

He looks at me with a raised eyebrow, “Liked it?”

“W-well…maybe that's not the right way to put it. I have people I love back home. But…no matter how much my parents or friends care about me, they've…never really understood what it's like to have health issues.”

Daiki nods, “Well, that's certainly something we understand here.”

We go into the performing arts building and stop in front of a door that says, ‘Costume Shop,’ in fading, peeling letters. Daiki opens the door and says, “After you.”

I thank him and enter, and find a very big rectangular room filled with racks of dusty old clothing and costumes. There are also run down sewing machines and lots of old wardrobes and trunks. This isn't what I expected to see. It's kind of amazing.

I find myself drawn to one clothing rack in particular, which has several sparkly dresses with sequins. One of them has stripes of gold, silver, and red sequins. I find myself oddly captivated by It.

“Those are something else, aren't they?”

I'm so startled by the question I drop my bread. I was so distracted I sort of forgot I wasn't alone.

Chiyo laughs, “Sorry. I guess you were in the zone, huh?”

She bends down and picks up my melon bread at her feet, while I get the curry bread.

“Yeah. I got distracted, s-sorry.” I notice now that Ken is here too. He and Daiki are sitting around a table in one of the few places in the room that isn't filled up by clothing racks and other stuff. Daiki is watching us with a bemused expression. Even though he can't see us, Ken is making a similar face. I think he is observing us in his own way.

I take a moment to truly take in the massive quantity of costumes in the room and then say, “This is an amazing club room.”

Ken laughs, “If you like dusty old junk.”

Chiyo clicks her tongue at him, “I agree with Nagisa. This place is neat. I've spent countless hours here and I still haven't seen everything.”

Chiyo and I sit down with the boys. Only now do I see that Daiki is sitting on a very big chair. It is gold with countless fake gemstones, and it has huge arm rests. I try and fail to suppress a laugh.

He smirks, “Ridiculous, isn't it? But it's one of the few chairs at Yamaku I can sit in. It's probably a throne from an old play, but I was pretty happy when I found it.”

I smile, “I'm glad you found it too.” I sit down in a regular chair and kick my legs, which don't quite touch the ground. “I have the opposite problem.”

Daiki laughs, “I suppose you do.”

As I eat my bread I think about the room I'm in and realize I have some questions.

I must have looked curious, because Chiyo taps Ken on the shoulder and says, “Explain this room to Nagisa.”

He nods, “As you can see, drama used to be a much larger club. Kind of like band. With dozens of members and regular performances throughout the year.”

“What happened?”

“We’re not entirely sure. But by about 10 years ago it was defunct. We found that all out when we started the club again last year and then our advisor showed us this room. We found some stuff that told us a little about it in here, but not much.”

I nod, “At my old school…the drama club was defunct too. My friends and I brought it back last year. My advisor there said…young people just aren't interested in plays anymore.”

Ken laughs, “Given the attendance at our performance last year…your old advisor knows what he's talking about.”

Chiyo slaps his arm, “Don't scare her away!”

He scoffs, “This coming from the girl who tore her head off within a minute of meeting her?”

Chiyo pouts, “D-don't bring that up! I'm trying to forget how awful of a person I was. I was up all night cringing at myself.”

Daiki laughs, “We all were.”

I laugh softly, “I-it's okay Chiyo. It was just a misunderstanding. You d-don't need to lose sleep about it.”

She smiles at me, “You're comforting me after I was awful to you? Are you like…the sweetest person ever?”

“I…I d-don’t think so.”

“Hmm…Yeah, the sweetest person ever probably wouldn't say they were the sweetest person ever.”

Ken clears his throat, “Can we…maybe get back on track, Chiyo? We were talking about the meager attendance at the play, remember?”

I nod, “H-how many came to your play?”

“Maybe 20 people? About 19 of which were faculty, staff, or our families. So, not a whole lot of young people. It's like your adviser said, not many of them are interested in plays.”

“Well, that's still an audience.”

Chiyo nods, “That's right. Don't mind Ken, he's gotta be the most pessimistic club president in the history of Yamaku.”

He scoffs at her, “I'm just a realist.”

Chiyo giggles and pokes Ken's arm, “I think that's on page 5 of the pessimist script. You know it so well you’re off-book.”

He laughs at her, “Fine, fine. I'm a little too negative. I should do better with new blood in the mix.”

—-----------------------------------

I'm at my first official club meeting, in the same room where we have lunch.

Ken says, “It would be nice if we could pick out a play by the end of the month. Any ideas?”

Chiyo says, “Well…how many willing actors do we have?”

I wait for someone to respond. But then I realize that my three clubmates are looking at me expectantly. They already know who is and isn't acting except for me.

Dorayaki.

“U-um…I'm willing to act if it will help. I d-don't have any experience though. I don't want to hold you back. O-or…ruin the performance. So maybe I should stay off the stage?”

Chiyo waves her hand at me, “If you’re willing, we’ll use you. The only way to get that experience is…well, to get experience.”

“O-okay…I'll do it. If you two help me learn.”

Ken and Chiyo both nod.

Daiki says, “So…three actors, then. We should look for plays with three roles. We could have someone play multiple roles, but that’s pushing it.”

I look at Daiki, “You don't want to act?”

“Well, we need one person who isn’t anyway, for the tech stuff. And…there aren't a lot of roles that work for me anyway.” He laughs. “Maybe if we do Beauty and the Beast. I can turn into Ken at the end.”

Chiyo and Ken laugh, but I don't. I don’t like how he's talking about himself. He's not a beast.

“I-if you want to act, you should. I can learn the other stuff.”

He smiles, “Really, Nagisa, I'm more interested in the offstage stuff anyway. Thank you, though.”

Ken says, “Should we stick to one act plays again?”

Daiki nods, “Those are the most feasible for our little group and non-existant budget.”

Ken says, “So…I guess we should do some research. Why don't we meet in a week, after looking into some potential plays? We can each pitch one we really like.”

—-----------------------------

Class just got out for the day, and I'm heading to the library to find some one act plays. When I arrive there, the place looks empty. Even the circulation desk looks unoccupied.

I walk up to it, thinking that someone might see me and come help me once they do. My plan pays off.

I hear “J-just a minute!” from behind me, just before I hear a grunt, followed by several thuds. I turn around and see a red-haired woman sprawled out on her back with books all around her. She lets out a pained moan.

“Ow…”

I rush over to her and kneel down, and pick up her glasses which must have fallen off during her fall. “Are you okay? Here are your glasses.”

She reaches out for them and puts them on,and then sits up, “I…think so. How clumsy of me. I'm sorry.”

People tell me I apologize too much. Is that what I sound like? Would I apologize for falling down?

Probably.

I smile at her, “Y-you don't need to apologize, ma'am. Let me help you.”

As we pick up the books and carry them to the front desk, I realize there are so many that if she carried them on her own, she probably couldn't see over them. No wonder she fell.

She smiles at me, “Thank you. You're very kind. I'm Yuuko, by the way. The librarian.”

Now that she’s standing and wearing her glasses, I recognize her.

“Oh! You work at the Shanghai too, don't you?”

She looks at me for a moment and then smiles, “Yes, you're the dorayaki girl, right?”

I blush at her name for me, “R-right. My name's Nagisa. I'm a third-year transfer student.”

She nods, “Nice to meet you. Can I help you find something?”

“Yes, ma'am. I'm looking for plays. I'm in drama club and want to do some research.”

I feel far too proud at being able to say I'm in drama club. I think I may have even puffed out my chest when I said it.

She nods and points, “You can find plays in that middle row, where the bean bag chairs are.”

I thank her and walk to the general area where I was directed, but I haven't seen any plays.

I notice the bean bags look pretty comfy. This looks like a nice place to read. There is a girl with beautiful long dark hair taking advantage of one of them. The moment I notice her she silently points to the shelf in front of her beanbag.

She must have overheard the conversation with Yuuko.

“Thank you.”

The girl doesn't respond.

I approach her and she looks very uneasy. She holds up the book she's reading like she's afraid of making eye contact with me.

She reminds me of when I first met Kotomi. She is afraid of me and she loves books. I wonder if she's a genius with a tragic past too? Hopefully not that second part.

I position myself in between her and the shelf and she scoots her beanbag back a little.

I find a book called, 10 Japanese One Act Plays. I pull it out and open it to the table of contents.

The girl on the bean bag whispers something, but I can't make it out.

I turn to look at her. Her book is still covering her face.

“I’m sorry…I didn't hear you.”

She whispers, “L-living…”

Confused, I look at her for a moment while I try to understand. But I can't see her face so it isn't helping. Then I give up and look down at the book. When I look at the table of contents, I see a play titled Living with Father.

I smile at the girl, even though she can't see it. She must have peeked over when my back was turned to see what book I would grab. She must be as well read as Kotomi, too.

“You like Living with Father?”

The book moves up and down. That must be a nod.

“Have you seen it on stage?”

The book moves from side to side this time.

“Thank you so much for your help. I think I'll check this out and I’ll start with that play.”

She mutters, “‘…w-w-welcome.”

She is really starting to fidget in the bean bag now, and her hands are starting to shake. Her knuckles are white from holding the book so tightly.

I really would like to talk to her more about the play and why she likes it, but I can tell she's very uncomfortable. I know she would prefer it if I left her alone.

I thank her again and return to the front desk to check out the book.

[ramiroflores]

Is this called a novel

[guthrum06]

Is this called a novel

Well, I think it'll be about 100,000 words when it's done. So it's defnitely novel length! But...still shorter than my two other longfics.

[guthrum06]

I’m in the club room with the other club members. We're each going to talk about a one act play we found and then pick one to perform.

Chiyo sighs, “So, which stuffy Chekhov play are you going to try to get us to do this time, Ken?”

He laughs, “I suppose I’m predictable. It's called A Marriage Proposal, and it's a comedy where a guy proposes to his neighbor's daughter even though he doesn't really like her. Even during the proposal they can't stop arguing about every little ridiculous thing, they get engaged anyway because it's socially and economically advantageous for both of them.”

Chiyo raises an eyebrow, “Uh…huh. And what brilliant commentary is Chekhov imparting this time?”

“That people don't really care about love or emotionally bonding. Relationships are just about keeping up appearances and pursuing wealth.”

Daiki chuckles, “Sounds like a fun one.”

Ken sighs, “And what pray tell, do you want to do, Daiki?”

He laughs, “Well…I know you'll all just say no.”

“Th-that's not true!”

He laughs, “Thanks, Nagisa. Maybe you won't. These two don't usually side with me. I'm used to being outvoted by their little alliance. Anyway, I found a fun American one by Tennessee Williams called A Special Kind of Romance. It's about this guy who is moving into a new apartment building, and the beautiful landlady is flirting with him the whole time but he's completely unaware,” He takes a moment to wink at Chiyo, who blushes and looks away from him. Then he continues, “...and he's far more interested in the cat that lives there.”

I haven't been able to tell for sure whether they are a couple. I've never seen them apart and they seem very close. Daiki's wink must mean they aren't together, though.

Ken laughs, “That does sound like fun. But I feel like we would really need a cat to pull it off. Are any of the ones on campus tame enough, Daiki?”

Daiki thinks for a moment and says, “Yeah…not so much.”

I must look as confused as I feel, because Daiki turns to me and says, “My dad’s a veterinarian in Sendai. So, I trap the cats on campus and take them to him to get spayed and neutered before bringing them back. I also feed them and stuff. But as Ken suggested, they aren’t the cuddly kind who would do well on stage.”

I smile at him, “That's really nice that you do that. I didn't know there were cats on campus.”

He chuckles, “That means the spaying and neutering is going well.”

Ken says, “Well, we can keep that one in mind. Maybe using a plush or something wouldn’t be too bad. Do you want to go next, Nagisa?”

“S-sure.” I stand up and hand out the pages I made copies of.

Chiyo whistles and says, “Damn girl, you brought handouts?”

“Um yeah…I made copies of the play. I didn't really do much. The librarian helped me.”

Ken looks confused at first when I hand him an open book, but then his hands flit over the page and his jaw drops, “You…got it in Braille?”

“I r-really didn’t do that much. I just asked the librarian about the book I found the play in. It turned out they had it in Braille.”

He nods and sets the book down, moving his fingers over the page with a smile, “Well, I appreciate it. A lot. Tell us about the play.”

“It's called Living with Father. I-it starts sad, but has a happy ending. It's about a young woman a few years after the war. She lives in Hiroshima and she was the only one in her family who survived. Several years after the war, she still struggles with guilt and grief. Closes herself off from people. B-but her father has been with her as a ghost ever since the bombing. She spends most of her time alone with him.

Then, she meets a man that she loves. But she isn't sure she should be happy. She thinks she has to stay sad to honor her family. That it would betray them to be happy. B-but the ghost of her father tells her that she needs to move on and love this man. He convinces her, and then he disappears.”

I look around to see the reaction of my clubmates but I can't tell much from looking at their faces.

Ken strokes his chin and then nods and says, “I like it a lot. Especially because it's Japanese, unlike our suggestions. There's one problem, though: that's two male roles and one female role.”

I nod, “I thought…m-maybe we could change the father to a mother?”

Ken nods, “We can change it to Living with Mother. Might have to rewrite some lines here and there, but that should be doable.”

Chiyo excitedly says, “I love it! So much that I don't even want to talk about my play. I want to do this one.”

“Wh-what? I want to hear about yours!”

Chiyo shakes her head, “Nah. This one sounds perfect.”

Daiki says, “Okay. Then are we ready to vote?”

This is moving so fast!

Ken says, “Say, ‘Aye’ if you want to do Nagisa's pick.”

To my surprise, all three of my clubmates say, “Aye.”

Chiyo laughs at my silence, “You don't want to do the one you suggested?”

I look down at my hands, “I…thought it would be r-rude to vote for mine.”

She rolls her eyes, “Of course you did. Well, you're out voted anyway.”

Ken says, “It's official, we're doing Living with Mother.”

“R-really? You don't want to think about it more?”

Ken shakes his head, “It sounds great. Weighty and serious, but sweet too. A real crowd pleaser. And relatable. It will be a good challenge for us as actors, I think.”

Daiki looks up from the copied pages I brought and adds, “I’ll have to look at it more deeply, but based on what you said and what I’ve seen so far, we don't need any crazy set or technical design.” He puts his hand to his chin, “Maybe some complex lighting and sound for when she hears thunder and remembers the bomb, but that sounds like fun to me.”

Chiyo laughs, “You nerd.”

“Well, we can't all be aspiring actors and actresses like you two. Besides, actors need nerds like me.”

I smile at Chiyo and Ken, “You two want to be actors after graduation?”

Ken nods, “We joined a student acting troupe in Sendai last summer, and we're doing it again this year. We've really liked it.”

So, they ARE a couple?

No, wait. That doesn't make sense based on Daiki’s wink earlier. But they sure use ‘we’ a lot.

I smile, “That's really great.” I turn to Daiki, “Do you want to do theater stuff too?”

He shakes his head, “Engineering. But I really like theater. Doing tech and design stuff is fun, but I think I want to do civil engineering. What do you want to do after Yamaku?”

I should have seen that coming. Once again I have to answer this question in front of a bunch of ambitious people who know what they want to do even though they are younger than me.

I shrug, “I d-don't know yet.”

Ken smiles, “Well…if you like acting enough, maybe you can join the same troupe we're joining for the summer. That would be fun, right Chiyo?”

She knits her eyebrows and looks at him with her mouth hanging open, before smiling at me and saying, “Y-yeah, that would be fun.” She clears her throat and says,”Um…back to the play, I bet we have all the war-era and postwar costumes we need in here. Might need to do some tailoring, though.” She gets up and begins rifling through one of the racks.

We spend some more time talking about the play and making some preliminary plans before we read it together. I’m very surprised they are all so excited about the one I chose.

I should thank that dark-haired girl from the library some time. It really was the best play in the book.

After we are done with club activities for the day, we walk back to the dorms together. After Chiyo and I break off to go to the girl’s dorm she says, “Hey…do you want to hang out later? I have some homework, but you can come by in an hour. I’ll do your nails for you.”

I'm very happy about her invitation. So far, I haven't spent one-on-one time with any of my new friends.

“Yeah, that sounds like fun.”

…

“What color do you want?”

I'm sitting on the floor with Chiyo in her room. She has two dozen colors of nail polish for me to choose from. I'm excited for this. Maybe having my nails painted will make me a little more glamorous, like Chiyo.

“U-um…I don’t know. I've never painted them. What color do you think suits me?”

She looks up at me and then back down at all her nail polish before picking up a bottle, “Hmm…this pale pink should be good. Not too loud. It would be really cute on you, I think.”

I smile, “Okay…let's do that.”

I spread out my hand in front of her, unsure if that's what I should do. She takes my wrist and guides my hand to my knee. I spread my fingers out, and she starts doing my nails.

“Thank you…for inviting me. And doing my nails.”

She smiles, “Of course. We're the drama club girls, y’know? We gotta stick together.”

I feel myself smile from ear to ear at her comment.

Then she sighs, and stops applying nail polish for a moment.

“I should be honest with you, though. …I wanted to do this to get to know you better and hang out…but um, I also wanted to…clear the air, I guess. So, I also have…ulterior motives…”

“What do you mean?”

She sighs, “You’re going to think I’m really petty.”

I shake my head, “I won't!”

She chuckles, “You can't say that. You don't know what I’m going to say!”

“I know but…if it's bothering you, it isn't petty. You should talk about it.”

She nods and then sighs, “I-it's embarrassing, but I just have to say it - I-I’m…in love with Ken.” She blushes and looks away from me.

I smile, “I thought you might be.”

She rolls her eyes, “Yeah…everyone knows but him. He's the densest guy in the world.”

“Well…he can't see your face when you blush and get all flustered around him, right?”

“True. But I still think it's obvious even if he can't see.”

I laugh, “Probably.”

She looks afraid of the answer when she asks, “So…um…do you maybe…like him?”

I shake my head. “H-he's nice and he’s handsome. I can see why you like him. But I don't.’”

She exhales and laughs softly, “Thank God! I was really worried you did, and this would come off as me saying ‘dibs!’ and then we would hate each other forever.”

“Even if I liked him too, I wouldn't hate you. And…you've known him longer, so it would be fair for you to tell me to back off.”

Chiyo rolls her eyes at me, “You're like a little angel.” She smirks, "Kind of look like one too.”

“I-is that good?”

She laughs, “I think so. Makes you easy to talk to.”

She goes back to painting my nails and we are silent for a while as I think about her situation. I don't want her to make the same mistake I did.

When she finishes I say, “If he isn't getting that you like him…why don't you confess?”

She frowns, “I don't know. It's…complicated.”

“Does he like someone else?”

“I don't think so. And I would probably know, because he’s also my best friend.” She looks at me closely. “I'm going to tell you something, but promise it stays between us, okay?”

I nod.

She smiles, “I've only known you a few weeks, but I'm already very certain you're not the type to go back on a promise. An angel would never break a promise, right?”

I sigh, “I-I’m not an angel…b-but I won't break my promise.”

She takes a deep breath and looks me in the eyes and says, “I can't have kids the usual way.”

I meet her gaze, but I'm not sure how to respond. What does that mean exactly?

Chiyo slaps herself in the forehead and chuckles, apparently realizing my confusion.

“That was a really weird way to put that, wasn't it? What I mean is…I don't have a uterus.”

“O-oh. I'm sorry.”

She laughs, “You don't have to apologize. It's not your fault.”

“I-I know but…it must be hard.”

She frowns slightly, “It…is. But it's better than the alternative.”

“I-it was making you sick?”

She nods, “Very. I had this thing…where my uterus was all messed up.” She frowns, and places her hand on her lower abdomen, “Adenomyosis, it's called. I got my first period when I was 11, and it was always really painful. I couldn't even get out of bed. I thought it was what all women went through and I was just weak. That's…pretty much what the doctors said too. That it was normal and I just had a low threshold for pain. B-but they were wrong…” She starts to sniffle a little and trails off.

I hand her my handkerchief and she smiles at me and wipes her tears.

“Y-you…don't have to tell me all of this right now.”

She shakes her head, “I want to. I know I’m tearing up and stuff, b-but…it feels good to talk about. Other than with my parents and medical people…I haven't talked about it before. ” Her eyes get wide and she looks at me, “U-unless I’m…oversharing and freaking you out. I can stop.”

I shake my head, “You’re not. I want to listen.”

She smiles at me, “Okay. Well…starting a few days after my 14th birthday, I was in debilitating, blinding pain about 50 times worse than normal…I spent the whole day in a hot bath because nothing else helped. And this time…it didn't stop when my period was over. I…burned myself a few times with heating pads, because that kind of heat was the only thing that gave me relief. I…have ugly burn scars.”

“I-I can't even imagine pain like that…”

Fatigue and exhaustion I can imagine. But the pain from HIDS isn't anything close to this.

She nods and grimaces, “Now the doctors finally looked into things and figured out it was a problem with my uterus. They tried lots of things, smaller surgeries and stuff. They wanted to preserve my uterus if they could. But in the end…the only way to make it stop was…taking it out. When they did, they saw it was so messed up I couldn't have kids anyway. So…it was the right choice. And I’m pretty much pain free now.”

I smile at her, “That's good.”

She smiles, “Yeah, it is. I still have one ovary too, so I have eggs. I can have biological kids if I want some day, but I can't carry them.”

I frown, “And…that's why you don't want to confess?”

She sighs and nods and then she starts speaking really quickly, “I know we're just in high school, so having kids doesn't need to come up. But…at what point am I supposed to tell a guy I can't have them? Should I tell him right away? Because…it kinda seems like I should. Any relationship could end up going that direction…and if I don’t tell him and he only finds out later, that doesn’t seem fair. And if I do tell him that might scare him into thinking I want to get married and have kids right away or something.” She sighs deeply. “I'm trying to sort all of that out.”

I take a moment to think about her words. They came out so quickly that I was a few words behind.

“That is hard. But…if two people are right for eachother and love each other, I don't think anything can keep them apart. If it's right…he'll understand.”

Chiyo laughs, “That's a very Nagisa thing to say.”

I frown at her.

She smiles, “I mean that…in a good way. I hope you're right. I really want to tell him. But at the same time I'm thankful he's so dense that I haven't had to tell him.”

“So you kind of like how things are?”

She frowns, “In some ways. In addition to the usual fears about a confession - like being rejected - I'm also scared of losing my best friend, and I'm scared of how he'll react to my…medical situation. So, I'm…just not sure.”

“I'm not either.”

After a few moments of silence she says, “What's worse, is, we've been close since we started drama club last year. So I've lied to him about it for a long time. So…I also have to tell him that at some point…”

“You lied?”

She nods guiltily, “I lie to everyone about my health. I-I’m…embarrassed about it. You…and one other person are the only students who know.” She hugs herself, frowns and looks off to the side. “And…the other person didn't find out because I wanted them to.” She shakes her head. “Anyway, I say I have anemia. Sometimes my hormone therapy doesn't keep things balanced and it makes me a little fatigued. So I tell people it's anemia. I lie because I don't want everyone to know the truth. Awful, isn't it?”

I shake my head.

She laughs wryly, “Oh, come on Nagisa. I bet you've never lied. No matter what. And here I am claiming to have a condition people actually suffer from, just to cover up embarrassment.”

“I don't usually lie. But…I might in your situation. It would be hard when it comes to…boys.”

She exhales, “If even an angel would consider lying, that makes me feel much better.”

I guess she’s just going to call me an angel from now on. I guess there are worse nicknames.

“I think…he will understand that lie when you explain it to him. A-and…if he doesn't, you probably don't want to be with him.”

“Yeah. Maybe.”

She isn't getting this. I need to be more forceful. Can I DO forceful?

I put my hands on her shoulders and look her in the eyes, “Y-you need to tell him soon, Chiyo.”

She looks at me with raised eyebrows, “You said that with some serious regret in your voice.”

I nod and pull my hands back to hug myself, “Th-there was a boy I fell in love with…at my old school. But I was scared to tell him. I thought…he wouldn't like me. His friends were mostly girls. And they were all…prettier, smarter, and more fun than me. A-and…then he ended up w-with one of them…and I'm very happy for them…b-b-but…”

My lip starts to tremble so I trail off and close my eyes tight, embarrassed that I'm still getting choked up about this. Despite my efforts, I feel a few tears run down my cheeks.

I feel Chiyo put her arms around me. I open my eyes and hug her back, very thankful for the comforting contact. It's my first hug since I left home.

“You know, Nagisa…the whole reason I wanted to talk to you tonight is because I thought we might be rivals, and I was worried.”

“Y-you don't have to worry.”

“What I'm saying is, I definitely would have to worry if you were interested in Ken.” She breaks the hug and looks me in the eyes. “You're really pretty. And sweet, and smart, and fun. So…please don't ever talk about yourself like you aren't, okay?”

“B-but I'm n-”

She puts a finger on my lip, stopping me from speaking. “Look at it this way. You're my friend. Would you like it if you heard someone talk about your friends the way you just talked about yourself?”

I shake my head. She smiles and removes her finger.

“Okay? You won't talk about my friend like that again?”

“I…I won't.”

“Good. I'm really sorry about that boy. Sounds like a real dumb-dumb.”

I snap at her, surprising both of us, “H-he's not dumb!”

Chiyo is taken aback for a moment, but then she laughs, “I just meant he's dumb because he didn't pick you. It's just a joke.”

“O-oh. Sorry.” I smile, “Then Ken's a… dumb-dumb too. I think…if he could see you, he would know you like him for sure. A-and be in love with you instantly.”

She chuckles, “Instantly? You think?”

I nod, “You already look like a famous actress. I-I'm sure you have the boys lining up.”

She blushes a little and fiddles with one of her braids, “I have received…some confessions, it's true. But none of them are Ken. Between…being in love with him and my health stuff…I haven't ever wanted a boyfriend. Not that isn't him.”

I nod, “I know…I didn't mean you should settle. J-just…you should be as confident as you want me to be. You're beautiful, talented, smart…all of it. I-if you feel more confident, you will be able to tell him. Despite everything.”

She sighs deeply and nods, “You're right. And if I don't do something soon, he might end up with someone else. Like your guy. Seeing…how much you regret not telling him definitely makes me want to go for it.”

“I'm always happy to talk about it with you if that's what you need. A-and let me know if I can help in any other way.”

She smirks, “Well…there are…a couple ways. First, don't come with us this summer.”

I giggle, “I wasn't planning to.”

She laughs, “Good. His stupid invitation is what got me worried that there might be something between you two I didn't know about. Also…would you mind playing the mother in the play?”

I smile, “You mean, so you and Ken can have romance scenes?”

Chiyo blushes and then nods, “I really liked the play you brought, but I was extra eager to go with it because I realized I’d get to do romantic scenes with him. I think that will give me some more courage.”

“Sure. I'm the oldest anyway. I should be the mom.”

She looks surprised, “How do you know that? You don't look any older than me. If anything, you look younger.”

I sigh, “I know I don't look it. But I turn 20 this year.”

“Oh. Yeah, you are the oldest. Ken and I are both 17 and won't turn 18 until the Spring. You're…more than 2 years older.” Chiyo frowns, “Did your health slow you down?”

I nod, “I get too sick for school all the time. Doctors took a very long time to figure me out, like they did with you. So, this is my third try at my third year.”

Her frown deepens, “Man, I suck. Here I am complaining about my boy problems and-”

“Chiyo…it isn't just boy problems. You had it just as hard as me. M-maybe harder. I've n-never had pain like you did. And I haven't had surgery even once.”

She nods, “I guess it isn't a contest. We both had it crappy in different ways.”

I smile, “Exactly.”

“Well…thank you for sharing. And listening. What do you say we spend the rest of our little girls’ night not talking about our health or stupid boys and just being silly?”

I laugh, “Okay.”

She gives me a big smile, “Hey, do you want me to add a design to your nails? Like mine?”

She flashes her nails at me, which are currently bright pink with cute little flowers of different colors on them.

“It doesn't have to be flowers. I can do other stuff too, as long as it's simple.”

It doesn't take long for me to come up with something I would like. They are simple. And all different colors too.

With a big smile on my face I say, “Can you do the Great Dango Family?”

She looks at me like I'm speaking an obscure foreign language, “The…huh?”

By now I really shouldn’t expect people to know what I’m talking about.

“Um…wait right here. I’ll be right back.”

She nods, still with a look of confusion on her face.

I go back to my room and get my plush dango, before returning with it. She uses my plush as a reference, and before long each of my nails have a different colored dango. Now I can look down at my hands and see the Great Dango Family!

Chiyo still doesn't really get it, but she seems very happy that I'm happy. And that's good enough for me.

---

I’m leaving the performing arts center for the day. We did a readthrough of the play now that our roles are assigned. I have a lot of work to do.

Ken and Chiyo really are great actors. Especially Chiyo. Between her looks and how well she can move through a wide range of emotions, I can't imagine she won't make it as an actress. I think the gap in our talent is going to be pretty obvious when we’re all up on stage, no matter how hard I work. I have the most lines too. I wish I had paid attention to that when I agreed to play the mother. But if this helps Chiyo get the courage to confess to Ken, I guess I can do it.

As I reach the main quad, I hear beautiful music. I follow the sound, interested in finding where it’s coming from. Before long, I find it.

There's a girl with shoulder-length light brown hair and honey colored eyes sitting on a bench and playing violin. I stifle a laugh, because it reminds me of Kotomi’s concert last year. Unlike her, this girl seems to know what she's doing. I don't have much experience watching live music, but something about how she plays her violin makes it hard for me not to watch and listen. I find myself standing stock still and staring with a small smile on my face.

After a few minutes, she curses and stops playing.

She glares in my direction and points at me with her bow, “You. Did anyone tell you it’s rude to stare? Did you get my permission to listen and watch? Are you at least going to put some money in my violin case or something?”

I feel flustered. “Um…sh-should I?”

She glares at me again, “That was a joke, idiot.”

I clench my eyes shut, embarrassed at my stupidity, “I'm sorry. I w-was just…listening and watching. I stopped because it sounded very b-beautiful. But…I’ll go.”

The girl sighs, “No… I’m sorry. I’m in a bad mood. You…didn't do anything wrong.”

I open my eyes again, “Are you in a bad mood because you made a mistake?”

She strokes the body of her violin with a sad look on her face. “Yeah. That's…pretty much…it.” Then she looks up at me and smiles. It's so bright it's hard to imagine she had such a sad expression just moments ago.

“Do you know the violin?”

I shake my head, “I only knew you made a mistake because of how you stopped. I have a friend who plays violin, though. Y-you’re much better.”

She laughs, “Is it Hikari?”

I shake my head, “She was my friend at my old school.”

She raises her eyebrows and starts to put her violin away, “Ah, I see. You’re a transfer student. The transfer student, even. I heard about you.”

“Y-you did?”

She smirks, “Just a little. Here, come sit with me. I’m not scary, promise…first impressions notwithstanding.” She giggles and puts her violin in its case on the ground before patting on the bench next to her.

I do as she asks and then say, “Wh-what have you heard?”

“Just that there's a new third year girl. It's big news around here.” She winks, “Especially among the boys.”

I blush and look down. “B-b-boys?”

I guess I am not quite as invisible here as I was at my old school. It's smaller. And I am certainly more confident and talkative thanks to the friends I made last year and how welcoming people have been. I guess it makes sense people notice me.

My benchmate smirks, “Aw. You're shy. That's cute. They'll love that. Well…I think they already do.”

I sit in silence as my cheeks continue to flush, not knowing how to respond. My benchmate stands up with the help of a cane, and then picks up her violin case.

“I gotta run.” She laughs. “Well, not run,” she thumps her cane on the ground, “but you know what I mean.”

I stand up and nod.

The girl frowns, “I'm sorry if I upset you, bringing up the boys thing. I'm just teasing.”

I shake my head, “I-it's okay. I…I'm just shy, like you said.”

She smiles, “Well, it was nice meeting you. I'm Saki, by the way.”

I smile back, “Nagisa. It was very nice to meet you too.”

She nods and starts to head off towards the school building. As she does, she says, “Feel free to listen to me play if you see me again, Nagisa. I won't be mean next time! Probably.”

I smile as I watch her walk away.