The 'Wild Speculation About Rin's Past' Thread

[Munchenhausen]

Speculation: Iwanako is literally a creature without a heart and, jealous of Hisao's, deliberately sought to destroy it.

By creating Katawako as a weapon of mass death. But, she accidentally added love to the recipe and created the most kawaii schoolgirl in existence instead.

So, we're basically saying that Katawako is essentially the Ultra-Tsundere?

That, and she floats.
Floating is the most kawaii of all transportational methods.

[AaronIsCrunchy]

By creating Katawako as a weapon of mass death. But, she accidentally added love to the recipe and created the most kawaii schoolgirl in existence instead.

So, we're basically saying that Katawako is essentially the Ultra-Tsundere?

That, and she floats.
Floating is the most kawaii of all transportational methods.

Well, I can't argue with that. It's almost unfair how kawaii a telekinetic limbless torso can be!

[someguy1294]

That, and she floats.
Floating is the most kawaii of all transportational methods.

...Okay, floating solves the horror brought on by the complete lack of mobility, but how the hell does she tell does she communicate when she's blind, mute and deaf? Telepathy is too obvious to me, so I like to think Katawako communicates by releasing a complex chain of pheromones into the air, kind of like an ant-queen.

Also, none of this has anything to do with Rin. Unlesss...

HOLY SHIT! What if Katawako is NOT actually a combination of the KS girls, but the source from which their DNA was extracted!? Each girl only got a fragment of Katako's DNA, which is why they all have one of her disabilities. Misha got the part of Katawako that wasn't actually a disability (drill hair and cuteness), and she only hangs out with the rest of the girls because she knows they're her sisters! Which also means that Misha's attraction to Shizune is INCEST!!!

And so are all those Rin/Emi cross fics you all wrote.

Did I win the internet yet?

[AaronIsCrunchy]

So... it's 1 girl manifesting herself in 6 girls, ensuring Hisao will fall for one of them and she can work her malevolent ways upon him, and soon all of mankind?
Yeah, you can have the internet for now

[linkoid]

Im not sure wether i should approach this logicaly or make things worse.
Here is a question. Why does Rin whear the male uniform? She's a lesbian. and she got all depressed when she confessed to Emi Shizune and Emi Shizune regected her.

Then Rin went on a rampage, ran over Emi's legs, then Hisao and Emi built a time machine and cut off her arms at birth, so Rin is extremely depressed when she sees her Hisao, the enemy!

[Trogdor]

...Okay, floating solves the horror brought on by the complete lack of mobility, but how the hell does she tell does she communicate when she's blind, mute and deaf? Telepathy is too obvious to me, so I like to think Katawako communicates by releasing a complex chain of pheromones into the air, kind of like an ant-queen.

Katawako communicates by radioactive decay. She has to eat radioisotopes periodically, like birds have to eat gravel to crush their food.

You see, Katawako's parents have a Terrible Secret. They're immortals. They were both mere infants back in 1945, one living on the outskirts of Hiroshima, and the other on the fringes of Nagasaki. They both survived their respective bombings without apparent injury, and grew up realizing they were different. They never get sick, they stopped aging at about eighteen, and both possess superhuman strength. They met by finding each other in the Personals section of a magazine devoted to the movie "Highlander".

Unfortunately, their blessing also comes with a curse. They can only have horribly deformed, immortal children. (Yes, that means she can't even kill herself.) Katawako was the first, and the last. However, she has also inherited their immunity to all forms of radioactivity, and can communicate by controlling nuclear decay. If you put a Geiger counter in front of her, she can make it approximate speech, despite the fact that she can't hear what she is doing.

The more she talks, the more often she has to eat a smoke detector. She glows in the dark. And if you stand too close, she can literally talk your ear off.

Now you know.

[Atario]

Also, she knows, like, math and stuff.

[Trogdor]

Also, she knows, like, math and stuff.

Katawako is angry at numbers. There's like, too many of them, and stuff. This is where Miki gets her hatred of math.

[Potato]

Im not sure wether i should approach this logicaly or make things worse.
Here is a question. Why does Rin whear the male uniform? She's a lesbian. and she got all depressed when she confessed to Emi Shizune and Emi Shizune regected her.

Then Rin went on a rampage, ran over Emi's legs, then Hisao and Emi built a time machine and cut off her arms at birth, so Rin is extremely depressed when she sees her Hisao, the enemy!

Literally no part of that answers the question "Why does Rin wear the male uniform?"

Katawako is just Godzilla in disguise.

[someguy1294]

Im not sure wether i should approach this logicaly or make things worse.
Here is a question. Why does Rin whear the male uniform? She's a lesbian. and she got all depressed when she confessed to Emi Shizune and Emi Shizune regected her.

Then Rin went on a rampage, ran over Emi's legs, then Hisao and Emi built a time machine and cut off her arms at birth, so Rin is extremely depressed when she sees her Hisao, the enemy!

So THAT'S why Rin walked in on Emi having sex! She wanted to join in, but was too shy to do so.

We need a Rin/Misha fic now.

[Munchenhausen]

Also, she knows, like, math and stuff.

If nothing else, that alone makes Katawako the most kawaiiest kawaii girl ever to kawaii

And so are all those Rin/Emi cross fics you all wrote.

EmiRin crossfics?
EMIRIN CROSSFICS?!
WHY HAVE I NEVER SEEN ONE OF THESE
THEY WERE LIKE MY ORIGINAL SHIP DAMNIT

[AaronIsCrunchy]

Also, she knows, like, math and stuff.

She only knows maths as it helps her calculate the most efficient way of dislocating each rib and ramming it up your pee-pee.

[linkoid]

Holy crap... Rin is actually a pokemon.

by linkoid
[Rin Riolu Pokemon]

Rinolu (Pokemon Rin).png (46.4 KiB) Viewed 5287 times

[Munchenhausen]

She only knows maths as it helps her calculate the most efficient way of dislocating each rib and ramming it up your pee-pee.

As kawaii as that sounds, I'd rather keep my pee-pee rib-free
That rhymes just enough you could sing it

Rinolu.png

ahahaha oh wow!

[AaronIsCrunchy]

She only knows maths as it helps her calculate the most efficient way of dislocating each rib and ramming it up your pee-pee.

As kawaii as that sounds, I'd rather keep my pee-pee rib-free
That rhymes just enough you could sing it

Just got an idea for an anti-Katawako 24 hour body spray...