Developments (Post-Lilly NE) [Complete, 2015-08-11]

[bhtooefr]

You know, something I just thought of...

The drabble in which Shizune plots to help Hisao out...

Is that referring to forcing him into a Student Council meeting that Lilly also has to attend, to try to push them back together (referring to the events of Farewell)? Or to a future event in this story?

Also, I did just think of a good way for Hanako to win that wouldn't involve her jumping into bed with Hisao, and would be even more rash of a decision than that (for someone with Hanako's specific anxieties, anyway). I'll keep it to myself, though.

[dewelar]

You know, something I just thought of...

The drabble in which Shizune plots to help Hisao out...

Is that referring to forcing him into a Student Council meeting that Lilly also has to attend, to try to push them back together (referring to the events of Farewell)? Or to a future event in this story?

Shizune and Misha's return is only a couple chapters away, so it won't be too long before we find out for certain. However, I do think there's enough info in this thread to answer that question.

[Endofone]

Great chapter again. =D I'm just really happy Hisao finally isn't so fraggin dense now, well smart enough to figure out a girl likes him =P. Mmmhmmm The smell of high school drama. Ohh Hisao, if you're going with Emi you better be ready for those daddy issues that are going to come bite you in the ass.

I thought that the whole scene with Emi was going to lead up to an impulsive kissing/confession scene, especially after what Emi said.

I considered this, but decided against it for a number of reasons. Hopefully they'll become clear over the story still to come.

Also, Hisao really has got to find a friend that isn't a love interest, and isn't biased about who he dates, so that he can talk about these issues

Someone's been reading my notes .

You know, something I just thought of...
The drabble in which Shizune plots to help Hisao out...
Is that referring to forcing him into a Student Council meeting that Lilly also has to attend, to try to push them back together (referring to the events of Farewell)? Or to a future event in this story?

Shizune and Misha's return is only a couple chapters away, so it won't be too long before we find out for certain. However, I do think there's enough info in this thread to answer that question.

I feel something fishy is happening here. ಠ_ಠ


Still hoping for a highly improbable Hisao x Lilly that'll never happen.

[dewelar]

What were you thinking, Ibarazaki?

As I run up to the nurse's office, I wish these legs were flexible enough to allow me to kick myself.

That was your moment! Why the hell didn't you just kiss him, you idiot?

I guess I know the answer to that question, though: he's starting to make me nervous. Every time I'm around him, I wind up saying things I'm not ready to say. It's like, he starts talking about all the stuff he's going through, and before I even think about it I start doing the same thing.

And you're scared of that. Admit it, Ibarazaki, you're scared of Hisao Nakai, more than anything since the accident.

And at the same time, you want him in your life, more than anything other than...

I'm now at the door to the nurse's office, so I cut that line of thinking off at the pass. I take a deep breath, gather myself, and knock. "Come in," I hear him say, so I do, closing the door behind me. "So, how was your evening run, hm?"

"It had its moments," I say as I hop up onto the table. "Hisao was down there when I got there."

The nurse's eyes widen a bit. "I hope you're not going to tell me you got him to run with you again."

I laugh and say, "Not after yesterday. I'd like to keep him in one piece, thanks. So, was he in to see you today?"

"No, he hasn't been. Why do you ask?"

I briefly wonder if this is even worth bringing up, but I decide to play it safe. "Well, when we were talking, he started getting himself worked up, and he grabbed at his chest."

The nurse puts on his serious face and says, "I see. Did you notice anything else unusual?"

"Nah, he seemed fine after a couple seconds. Sometimes I think he worries himself too much."

"Maybe compared to you. From the looks of this leg, you could stand to worry a little more about yourself. You need to do a better job taking care of this."

I can't help but start fidgeting at that. "It's not that bad."

"No, not yet, but you know it could be if you don't..." He shakes his head. "Well, you know the drill. Anyway, keep an extra-close eye on Hisao tomorrow morning, and if he looks like he's having any problems, make sure he comes in."

"No problem."

As he starts looking at the other leg, he adds, "Also, if you think Nakai is worrying about himself too much, it might be a good idea for you to get him out and about, get his mind off things." He looks up at me with a grin. "After all, we can't have him having a heart attack because he's worried about having a heart attack, can we?"

"Um...that can't actually happen, can it?"

The nurse winks at me. "Probably not." I roll my eyes as he finishes up the exam. "I wasn't kidding about getting him out of the school for a while, though. It would probably do him some good."

I pause in putting my legs back on to shoot a look at the nurse. "Did you...just tell me to ask Hisao out on a date?"

He laughs, shaking his head. "I'm not the one who put that label on it, sunshine. But if it makes you feel better, then yes, you may ask him out on a date for purely medical reasons with my blessing."

I glare at him. "You really are an asshole, you know that?"

He just grins, and I soooo want to punch him right now. "So, I presume this means you and Hisao have been getting closer."

I start to fidget again, not sure if I even want to answer that question. When I do, my mouth immediately launches ahead of my brain. "Sorta, I guess. I mean, I've been trying to take things slowly, but lately we've been talking a lot more, and now I think he might finally be over his ex-girlfriend, so..."

He still has that annoying grin on his face as he interrupts me. "...so you think it's time to make your move?"

I roll my eyes, saying "You don't have to put it like that."

He chuckles, continuing, "Well, just remember what I said last time we talked about young Mr. Nakai. Just make sure you take things slowly...well, as slowly as you can anyway." He winks at me. "Since it's you, I'll be sure to have a full triage unit standing by."

"Asshole." He laughs, and so do I. "Well, since we're on the subject, I guess I might as well ask. What exactly do you think he might be able to...um...handle?"

His eyes widen a bit, but that damn grin is still there. "Nothing too strenuous, but I'm going to make one suggestion that shouldn't be too difficult under the circumstances."

"What's that?"

"If you're going to have sex, you should probably be the one taking the initiative. Less strain on him that way, if you know what I mean."

I grin at him. "You're right, that shouldn't be a problem." I pause for a second, then add, "Not that I'm...planning anything like that or anything."

He winks at me again. "Oh, no, of course not."

"Are we done here? ‘Cause I've got to get back for dinner."

"Yes, we're done. Say hi to your mom for me."

"I will." I open the door, but turn around before going through. "And thanks."

"Anytime," he says, with a slightly less annoying grin on his face, and I run back up to the dorm.

After my shower, during which I scratch a certain itch that developed after my run, I get dressed and head down to the bus stop. Waiting gives me time to consider what the nurse said about Hisao, and he's right. The guy really needs to get out of this school, at least for a day.

During the bus ride, I start thinking about when and where we could go in the city. I was planning to wait until Hanako left, but maybe sooner would be better – maybe even tomorrow, if he's up for it. I think it'd be a great way to kick off the whole moving forward thing.

As far as what we should do, I figure we can just take it as it comes. Since Hisao grew up in a city himself, it'd be easiest to ask him what he wants to see. It sounded like he's only really been shopping in Sendai, so maybe just walking around would be cool.

Feeling pretty good about this plan, I get off the bus and walk the rest of the way home. I knock on the door and call out, "Hi, Mom, I'm home!"

"Come in, dear, it's open." As I do, Mom comes around the island and gives me a hug. "A little late tonight, aren't you? Why didn't you call and let me know?"

"Yeah, sorry about that. I missed the earlier bus because I got talking to someone, and I guess I forgot to call."

"Someone?" She asks as she starts setting out dinner. "That someone wouldn't be your mysterious new running partner, by any chance, would it?"

"He has a name, Mom," I say, trying to hide the smile on my face as I move to help. "It's Hisao Nakai, and he's not that mysterious, really."

"Well, in that case, tell me about him."

I sigh as I sit down at the table. "You mean your friend the nurse hasn't already filled you in? He says hi, by the way."

"Nakai...isn't he the boy who came in mid-semester? The one he wanted you to try and help get in shape?"

I nod. "Yeah, that's him. Hisao finally decided to get serious about it. He's already starting to get into a rhythm, too."

"So how are the two of you getting along?"

"Pretty good. He's been kinda down lately, but I think he's doing better now."

Mom gives me a hug from behind before sitting down herself. "You always were good at cheering people up, dear."

I roll my eyes. "Yeah, well, this was different. Hisao was kind of a tough nut to crack. We had to talk a lot to get him out of it."

Mom raises an eyebrow. "Talk a lot? You? Never!"

"Ha, ha. I meant...you know, serious talking. He just broke up with his girlfriend a couple weeks ago, and I've kinda been the one...listening to him."

She stops in the middle of taking a drink. "I see. That is different."

I open my mouth to make a comeback, but on thinking about it, she's right. There's something about Hisao that makes me want to listen to him. Maybe it's because he's so sincere about everything he says. Maybe that's why I've been telling him stuff, too.

I think about this while we're eating, and as usual Mom's watching me too closely for my own good. After a while, she puts down her fork and asks, "What are you thinking about, dear?"

I look away from her, saying, "Nothing, Mom."

"Well, then you're sick, because you're hardly eating anything."

I sigh, muttering "I'm fine," under my breath.

She gives me one of her looks, and gets that earnest tone in her voice. "Come on, dear, talk to me."

At this point, she's not going to be satisfied unless I say something. I figure I might as well see what she thinks about things, because I'm not going to get any advice out of Rin. I put my fork down and push my plate away, and dive into the topic. "Mom...have you ever been...afraid that you were telling someone too much about yourself too fast? Like, they made you feel too comfortable around them?"

Mom eyes widen, like I've just given her a present. I suppose I have, since she lives for being able to talk about this stuff with me, and we don't do it very often if I have anything to say about it. Then, she smiles. That's always a danger sign.

And it's that "I know something you don't" smile. I REALLY hate that.

"Hmmm...I think I know what you mean. When I was in school – you know, way back in the Edo period – I met a young man who had my head all mixed up, too. He made me feel like I could tell him anything, and yes, it scared me just a little. Being vulnerable is like that, I suppose."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, when you tell things about yourself to someone, it can almost feel like...well, like you're losing part of yourself to them. At least that's how I felt, I didn't know what to do. For a while, I even tried avoiding him, to avoid losing more of myself."

"Did it help?"

"Well, yes and no. After a while, I found that I actually...missed that feeling. When I told him about it, he laughed, because he had been feeling the same way."

Despite her smile, Mom has sounded kinda sad during this whole conversation, and I think I just figured out why. "You're talking about...Dad, aren't you?"

Mom nods. "When we finally did confess to each other, we knew that we weren't losing anything. We were just sharing ourselves with each other. That's what being in love means."

Okay, now this is starting to freak me out. What is she trying to say, that Hisao and I are going to turn out like...

Shit. No. That is NOT going to happen.

"Um...can I be excused? I've got to...go do something." Mom smiles, but doesn't say anything as I pretty much run to my room.

Nah, that can't really be what she's saying. She's probably just trying to push me into the boyfriend thing again. "I want grandchildren, Emi!" Sheesh, she doesn't know when to quit.

But...

...what if she's telling the truth?

As usual, I have to figure this out on my own. I mean, I like Hisao, and want to spend time with him. I've had to take things slower than I wanted, so I've been looking beyond just today. I've never been good at that, so that's probably messing me up. Still, things haven't gone badly otherwise. As long as I can keep myself from saying things I shouldn't, everything should go smoothly.

Yeah, maybe I'm just overthinking things.

...

Aw, crap, I'm picking up on Hisao's bad habits now? Maybe I really am doomed...

After cleaning up and taking my legs off, I throw myself onto the bed. Hopefully, a good night's sleep will make everything look better in the morning. Besides, I need to get to bed if I'm going to wake up in time to catch the bus.

The next morning, I get up before dawn. I remember waking up a couple times during the night, which I haven't done since...well, since the anniversary. It's probably because of what Mom was talking about last night weirding me out. I kinda want to get out of the house before she gets up, because if there's one thing I don't want, it's for that subject to come up again. I write a quick note telling her I'll be home for dinner, then head out to the bus stop.

On the ride to Yamaku, I try to get myself focused on thinking of fun things to do with Hisao in the city. Unfortunately, my stupid brain won't stop trying to put me back in freak out mode, so I just zone out altogether and nearly miss my stop.

I really need a good run this morning.

After a quick detour to my dorm room to put my blades on, I run full speed down to the track. I am really glad I don't have to wait long for my partner, as it's only a few minutes before I spot Hisao coming down the hill.

"Hey, Hisao!" I say, waving to him. "Bright and early today, I see!"

"Not as early as you."

"That's true!" I grin at him. As we stretch out, I can see that Hisao's got that look like he wants to say something again. Honestly, I kinda want him to, but it's better to wait until after the run. "Ready to go?"

Hisao nods, smiling. "I was born ready!"

Still in a good mood after yesterday. That's a good sign.

"Sounds good!" I say with a laugh as we move out onto the track. "Now let's see if you can keep up on those improvements from yesterday!"

We fall into our usual routine at first, but after the first lap, I see Hisao picking up his pace slightly. I look back at him questioningly, but for now he looks fine, so I do the same. We get to the end of his routine for the day, so he slows into cool-down. I call out "You're really starting to get into a rhythm, Hisao! Looking good!" He smiles at the encouragement, and I motion to him that I'm going to start my sprints.

I take off around the track...

...

air . . . wind . . . ground . . . track . . . . . . . . .
. . . will . , . not . . . hold . . . back . . . , . .

Damn it, Mom...

. . . . . . hear . . . smell . . . feel . . . see . . ,
. . . . . . . . . set . . . these , . . thoughts . ^ . free

Why did you have to compare him to Dad?

wind . . . air . . . track . . . ground . . . , , . . . .
. . . one . . . more . . ^ time . . . round . , . . ^ .

Don't I have enough...

. . ^ . . . time . ^ . space . . . form . . . flight . , ^

...to worry about...

. . . . ^ . . . . all . . . shall . . . b^e . . , , li^||

...losing...?

As I slow down to join Hisao on his cool-down laps, he gives me a concerned look. "Everything okay, Emi?"

Damn it again. I should have known he'd notice. Maybe I can still pass it off.

"Yeah, Hisao, I'm fine."

"You...didn't look fine on that last sprint. You looked like you stumbled a couple times."

"Oh, that. Yeah, I probably just need to adjust something. Don't worry about it, Hisao."

He raises an eyebrow, saying "Well, you're going to the nurse after this anyway, right?"

Yep, he's not buying it.

"Right," I say with an exaggerated sigh. Now that he's brought it up, I know I'm stuck either way, but if I go I'm taking him down with me. "What about you? After that little thing last night, it probably wouldn't hurt for you to pay him a visit, either."

He grimaces, so at least I have that little satisfaction. "I know. I probably should have gone last night, but something distracted me." He smiles, and I try my best to smile brightly back at him.

So much for that good mood.

Neither one of us says much as we finish cooling down. I catch him watching me every once in a while to make sure I'm okay. It's sweet, in a way, but I don't want him to start worrying about me. He needs to know I can deal with this.

Of course, it could just be him overthinking again. Or me overthinking again. Gah, I guess we BOTH need that distraction.

We don't talk much on our way to the nurse's office, either. When we get there, I stop at the door and turn to Hisao. "If...you're meeting Hanako again for lunch, you should probably go first."

Hisao gives me a weird look, or maybe a look with a bunch of different thoughts behind it. "All right. As long as you're still here when I come out." He tries to smile again, which I can appreciate. "Otherwise I might have to hunt you down."

Ah, there's that sense of humor coming back.

"I'm tempted to take you up on that, Hisao!" I say, with a grin I didn't need to try to wear this time. He goes in, and suddenly I feel like I'm ready to bounce off the walls again. When Hisao does come out, I ask "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, he said my heart sounds much better than it did a couple days ago." He looks a bit serious as he says, "So are you going in or what?"

I throw my hands up in mock outrage. "All right, all right, I'm going. Geez, whatever happened to captain's privilege?" That at least gets a laugh from Hisao. I give him another quick smile as I walk by him, which he returns.

After the nurse examines me, during which he puts on a serious face of his own, I know there's bad news coming. "I warned you to take better care of yourself, Emi. This sore on your right leg isn't healing properly. It's not serious, but you're going to have to take it easy for a couple of days."

"I can still run on it, though, right?"

The nurse sighs. "I'm not going to say you can't, but that doesn't mean you should. Since you're going to anyway, I'll just tell you not to overdo it. No more than one run a day, and avoid putting unnecessary pressure...well, you know this drill, too." He hands me a tube of some kind of cream. "Use this on it for the next couple of weeks, and make sure you come in here every day."

Mumbling my agreement, I leave the office. Of course the moment I know what I want to do to help Hisao out, I can't do it because I screwed up my own head and knocked myself out of commission.

Good job, Ibarazaki. Now you're subconsciously sabotaging yourself.

Well, the least I can do is let him know how things went. I'll give him a call later.

~~~~

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[bhtooefr]

Interesting effect, what you did with the poem, to show that Emi's having trouble.

during which I scratch a certain itch that developed after my run

I see what you did there. That said, would Emi beat around the bush like that, though, in her own thoughts? (Pun fully intended.)

[dewelar]

Interesting effect, what you did with the poem, to show that Emi's having trouble.

Thanks. I didn't get any comments on the original presentation, so I wasn't sure how it would play.

during which I scratch a certain itch that developed after my run

I see what you did there. That said, would Emi beat around the bush like that, though, in her own thoughts? (Pun fully intended.)

A fair question. The thing is, I'm not sure how else to phrase it properly in context. I mean, Emi coming right out and say "I masturbated" didn't ring true either, so I went subtle. Chalk it up to lack of experience with hearing/reading about girls talking about that particular subject, I guess . At least I got the point across .

[bhtooefr]

And, on a second reading...

"Um...can I be excused? I've got to...go do something." Mom smiles, but doesn't say anything as I pretty much run to my room.

I just had a hilarious vision of Emi and Hanako racing against one another on Yamaku's track, and instead of a starter's pistol, someone says something to each of them to trigger their anxieties about Hisao (well, in Emi's case, via her anxieties about her dad). With an "IGOTTOGODOSOMETHING" from each of them, they're off! (My money's on Hanako.)

I am a horrible, horrible person.

[Mirage_GSM]

Didn't she want to invite him to the city that day?
Good chapter. A bit longer than usual if I'm not mistaken.

[dewelar]

Didn't she want to invite him to the city that day?

*nods* The idea is that she and Hisao got preoccupied with the leg thing, so it got put off until after visiting the nurse. Thus, it will be part of the "call him later" bit .

Good chapter. A bit longer than usual if I'm not mistaken.

Thanks. And yes, this is (for the second chapter running) the longest chapter to date at ca. 3300 words. Too soon to say if that's significant, but it felt like the right length for it to be.

[FineFinnishFinish]

Didn't she want to invite him to the city that day?

*nods* The idea is that she and Hisao got preoccupied with the leg thing, so it got put off until after visiting the nurse. Thus, it will be part of the "call him later" bit .

Very conveniently timed for Hanako's lunch with Hisao

[dewelar]

A quick update:

The next chapter has been proceeding somewhat slowly, but is proceeding. I'm trying something a little more ambitious with it, so hopefully it turns out well. However, I refuse this time to predict when it might be ready.

A few general comments:

First of all, thanks again to everyone who has been reading and commenting on this story. I still find myself in awe of how many views this thread has gotten in just a couple months. This is the first time I've written anything that was longer than a few pages, so sometimes I still feel like I'm finding my way through this. I hope that everyone thinks I've been doing justice to the characters in the process, and would appreciate any feedback, good or bad, along those lines that anyone wants to send my way -- especially as it pertains to Emi, whose chapters have had a lot less response than the others lately.

Anyway, thanks for all the support and, as always, I hope everyone continues to enjoy reading!

[Machoman]

I have no idea how this is gonna play out but I'm definitely enjoying it.

[dewelar]

It's still a couple hours until I'm supposed to meet Hanako for lunch when I head down to the main building. I have something I want to ask, so I'm hoping to catch her in the library, or at least in the tea room. I'm carrying an armload of books, which I'd been procrastinating at returning, so I head for the library first.

When I get there, I drop my books into the return bin. Oddly, instead of one thump in response, I hear two. Yuuko's head pops up from behind the counter, followed by a second head that looks vaguely familiar. It belongs to a thin, light-haired boy, slightly shorter than me and wearing dark glasses.

"Argh..." says the boy, holding the back of his head. "I see what you mean about that being an occupational hazard, Yuuko."

Yuuko fidgets nervously as I laugh in spite of myself. "Sorry about that. I was just returning some books."

"Thank you, Hisao," Yuuko says, still fidgeting. "Are these all of the ones you still have?"

"No, I still have a couple, but I should be finished with them before Saturday."

"Good. Not everyone returns their books on time, and it's really a bother to have to close up without everything being properly cataloged."

"Hisao...that name sounds familiar." says the boy. "Have we met?"

"No, I don't think so. I just started here a couple months ago."

A look of recognition spreads across his face. "Oh, you're that Hisao! The one who was dating my predecessor!"

"I'm...sorry?"

"You're Lilly's boyfriend..." He grimaces before continuing, "or...um, were, I guess. Sorry. I'm Yoshiro Kamisaka. I'm the one they stuck with 3-2's class rep duties for the rest of the year."

Ah, that's where I've seen him before, working the stalls back at the Yamaku festival. Yoshiro holds out his hand a bit off from my current position, and I move slightly so I can shake it. "Hisao Nakai. Pleased to meet you. So what are you doing back there?"

"I'm also taking over Satou's duties helping Yuuko with the Braille books. She'd just...dropped some of them, and I was helping her pick them up." He waves a couple books in the air before placing them on the counter. "You're in the same class as Maeda, right?"

I have to dig into my memory for the name. "Takashi Maeda? Yeah, why?"

"He's a friend of mine. We're in the art club together. I'm going to guess you're not too well acquainted with him yet, though."

"Art club? You must know Rin, then."

"Tezuka?" Yoshiro drops his head. "Yeah, I know Tezuka." He lifts his head, then speaks in a very Rin-like, deadpan voice. "There is a boy. In the art club. He is blind." He shakes his head. "Gah...I've been hearing about it for three years. Drives me up the wall."

"Yeah," I say with a chuckle. "I think Rin has that effect on a lot of people."

Yoshiro nods. "Yeah, but at least she talks to them. Me, she just watches...or so I'm told." He grimaces again. "Then again, I hear talking to her might be even worse. Tell you what, Nakai -- promise me you'll never mention the Tezuka thing again and you've got a friend for life."

I laugh, shaking my head. "Yeah, okay, you have my word. Sorry, but I need to get going. It was nice meeting you, Kamisaka."

"Same here, Nakai." As I walk toward the back of the library, I can just barely hear him saying "Seems like he's got a lot on his mind," to which Yuuko replies, "I think that's just normal for him."

Yeah, I suppose it is.

~~~~

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====

Okay, so, what I wanted to do for Chapter 20 has gone down in flames, and I have just started to rewrite it nearly from scratch, so it'll be at least a few more days before it comes out.

One of the casualties of said flame-out is the above. It's actually a passage I've been trying to work in for several chapters, but for which never really found a home. Rather than continue to try and wedge it in where it doesn't fit, I decided to make it an interlude. I hope what I'm doing with this character doesn't interfere too much with some established fanon that I've been unable to locate (the only piece I've seen that even gives blind-art-class-boy a name is H&K:MD, which I think is pretty much an AU, so I hope I'm on safe ground with making this an entirely different character).

[Mirage_GSM]

In my opinion there is no such thing as "established fanon." Those words are mutually exclusive.
In my story (Tripping - find link in my sig) I named the character Takumi Mori. Don't bother to try to adapt your story though, because in mine he's secretly in love with Rin... Doesn't seem to fit what you had in mind for him at all.

[dewelar]

In my opinion there is no such thing as "established fanon." Those words are mutually exclusive.

True enough. However, in every fan-verse there are things that are portrayed in a certain way nearly universally (e.g., as mentioned in another thread, that Kenji's never-named-in-canon ex-girlfriend is Yuuko), to the point that it gets questioned when portrayed otherwise.

In my story (Tripping - find link in my sig) I named the character Takumi Mori. Don't bother to try to adapt your story though, because in mine he's secretly in love with Rin... Doesn't seem to fit what you had in mind for him at all.

Hmmm...I don't remember the search criteria I used to try and find this character's appearances, but obviously they weren't good enough. I haven't yet read "Tripping" because I tend to avoid fics that were written pre-full release, but will add it to my to-read list now that I've had a look at that chapter. Very interesting concept .