Hanako's Broken Heart Club

[YZQ]

Agreed. Top on the "to do" list is to remind the female friend that no boyfriend/girlfriend is worth giving up what you already have. If (s)he wants you to choose, a hiking session is in order.

[Auratus]

Well, Chest pain... Tired easily... I am having it recently. Does anyone familiar with these symptom? I guess I don't want to hear the answer through. It is ringing in my head. For some reason I found it is harder to track my own pulse. I never set foot farther than 100 meter radius from my house recently, and it would be hard for anyone in my family if I said "Mom, Can I have a checkup at hospital, I feel like I might having ...". Luckily I almost certainly enrolled in a university in Computer Engineering which my mother already rent a dorm for me (and I gonna live close with my crush YAYYYY!). So I would have less weird feeling to continue/restart Emi-inspired running and maybe save money for my own checkup. I am pretty much bored and few word with my crush daily are something different between days. What should I do? There are too much to do and nothing to do in the same times .

@Neoteros I personally believe that, why worry about cheating if you think she love you enough. One have many better alternative way to keep his/her lover than force another to cut communication. I am quite understand how "hard" it is, It's effect will fade over time. For time being I suppose it is best not try to influence her decision and wait. If the situation changed you can ask us .

[demonix]

Cutting off a girlfriend from her friends, family, and support system is a classic warning sign of an abuser.

You go straight to the top of the class there as there was an advertising campaign run in the UK about abuse in relationships, and one of the more recent adverts shows exactly what you've just said.

This is the full version of the advert in question (got to around the 0:46 mark for the guy not wanting his girl to have any friends beyond him).

@Neoteros: I'd suggest that you tell her to dump that A-grade ass, and be quick about it.

[pandaphil]

Thanks. Sadly I've read far too many true crime, and FBI profiling books. So little tidbits like that have stuck in my head.

As someone who's never had any luck finding a romantic partner, I get doubly pissed off when I hear about guys who abuse women. WTF is wrong with you people?

[KeiichiO]

WTF is wrong with you people?

You have no idea how many times I ask myself this same question. People are weird.

[Neoteros]

Cutting off a girlfriend from her friends, family, and support system is a classic warning sign of an abuser.

You go straight to the top of the class there as there was an advertising campaign run in the UK about abuse in relationships, and one of the more recent adverts shows exactly what you've just said.

This is the full version of the advert in question (got to around the 0:46 mark for the guy not wanting his girl to have any friends beyond him).

@Neoteros: I'd suggest that you tell her to dump that A-grade ass, and be quick about it.

She's actually thinking about dumping him, at least that's what she told me yesterday.

[pandaphil]

Well, Chest pain... Tired easily... I am having it recently. Does anyone familiar with these symptom? I guess I don't want to hear the answer through. It is ringing in my head. For some reason I found it is harder to track my own pulse. I never set foot farther than 100 meter radius from my house recently, and it would be hard for anyone in my family if I said "Mom, Can I have a checkup at hospital, I feel like I might having ...". Luckily I almost certainly enrolled in a university in Computer Engineering which my mother already rent a dorm for me (and I gonna live close with my crush YAYYYY!). So I would have less weird feeling to continue/restart Emi-inspired running and maybe save money for my own checkup. I am pretty much bored and few word with my crush daily are something different between days. What should I do? There are too much to do and nothing to do in the same times .

@Neoteros I personally believe that, why worry about cheating if you think she love you enough. One have many better alternative way to keep his/her lover than force another to cut communication. I am quite understand how "hard" it is, It's effect will fade over time. For time being I suppose it is best not try to influence her decision and wait. If the situation changed you can ask us .

I really think with symptoms like that that you really should see a Doctor.

[Auratus]

Well, Chest pain... Tired easily...

I really think with symptoms like that that you really should see a Doctor.

It would be hard for my family to take it. But university's admission have (probably crude) checkup. So I would ask anyone who checkup on me for advice. I might also jogging in university. (As my crush occasionally complain about her shape, especially thigh. I might convince her to be my running partner... and way to go from there )

and my chest is hurt briefly just when I try to sleep, but I suppose that's the clear symptoms. Pandaphil, Do you have any advice for me which potentially having cardiac problem? My mom was told me years ago that my "way older" cousin is having cardiac problem which why he isn't married yet despite his brother did for 6 years.

[Gamera Ramen]

and my chest is hurt briefly just when I try to sleep, but I suppose that's the clear symptoms. Pandaphil, Do you have any advice for me which potentially having cardiac problem? My mom was told me years ago that my "way older" cousin is having cardiac problem which why he isn't married yet despite his brother did for 6 years.

In my (infinitely uneducated) guess, are you aware of any sort of genetic heart/other chest organ condition in your family? Anything your uncles/aunts/grandparents have/had?

[SirSlaughter]

Well, Chest pain... Tired easily... I am having it recently

I really think with symptoms like that that you really should see a Doctor.

This right here! Don't tell us (Well I mean tell us to let it out of course like you did just now) tell a doctor, get someone who is trained and has studied for this kind of stuff to check you out and makes sure it isn't something big.

Oh and as for me:

Well I had broken up with my boyfriend (yeah I'm a guy too, get over it) because his retarded ass got drunk (again) and decided to push the issue of something a said a while back. We stopped talking for a week and then he gets drunk (AGAIN) and calls me out saying I am BSing him and lying about how I feel. I have nothing to lie about, seriously, why would I lie about something like this?

Well I told him I wanted to visit him beforehand so I could break up with him in person (He's 19 hours away by car) and maybe have the relationship end on a softer (But still sad obviously) note.
I wanted to be in person and show him I cared enough to end it like a real person and be there for him when I struck he final blow to end it all.
Well get this, he tells me he was happy I didn't visit him because he would have killed me. At first I was like, sure the metaphorical kind of kill, but nope, he straight up said he would have shot me. So I exploded at him and made it clear that any feelings I have ever had for him were just destroyed and that he had better never talk to me again. I have never been so hurt in my entire life. I was shocked beyond belief. No one has ever made that kind of statement of threat on my life since I was 4. I've faced down the barrel of a loaded gun and I never want to go through that ever again. I was 4 fucking years old and I had some hoodlums put a damned revolver in my face. Luckily I was only 4 years old and so naive and thought it was a fake gun so they let me off thinking they were funny. But my father found the gun later and the gravity of the situation hit me (several years later after I looked back on that moment and put 2+2 together).

So yeah, that was a fun weekend, getting nonstop messages on skype and stuff at 3 in morning and then receiving a blatant threat on my life.

[YZQ]

Stuff worthy of BHC and guns should never be mixed. Alcohol and guns, too.

[pandaphil]

@Auratus: Are there any kind of low cost clinics where you are that you could go to? Here in Seattle its the local clinic that keeps me going with my heart and blood pressure medicines at fairly low cost. Its a big improvement over the $20,000 charge I got from my one stay in the hospital.

@Sirslaughter: Oh man, I'm so sorry to ear what you've been through. I really glad you got out of there when you did. Guy sounds like serious bad news. Are you gonna be okay?

[Auratus]

Few day ago. I was promised happily with my crush that, I will give her a gift in her birthday next year as I can't do this year. Moment ago, I am lying in bed, Crying, concerning that my next sleep will become eternal, and here I am. Typing while crying, and still with no courage to tell my parent yet.

I start thinking I should take "Live like you're dying" seriously as, well... I think I should either tell my family very soon or start typing/writing my last word or both. One to you guys, One to my family, One to my crush. All to my "friends".

I living lazily for a month and just realize I might having my last. It's feel depressing. As I would study in Computer Engineer. I have a dream, A dream of the world where no one needs psychotherapist. Where no one suffer from depression. Depression is a major cause for morbidity and currently affect 4 percent of world population. And cause suicide, injury, unproductive, illness and numerous thing that cause death. I wish I can end it, or if I can't. Then hopefully someone end it.

[YZQ]

Do a checkup, and get a diagnosis.

[pandaphil]

Do a checkup, and get a diagnosis.

Yes please do. We don't want to lose you.